My man's got this friend named Chad. Chad isn't his real name, but that's what we're going with for this article. Chad is in a relationship that is ... well ... there's a reason Facebook had to come up with the "it's complicated" status. Nobody is happy, they often go out of their way to avoid one another or are forcing performative affection for the 'gram. One night, Chad decided he was going to hide from LadyChad and told her he couldn't see her because he was spending time with us. He then made up a whole elaborate story about drinking wine (which he doesn't normally do) and overdoing it because he really liked it.
Thing is, Chad never told US that he used us as a ridiculously specific cover story.
So imagine my surprise when I get a message from LadyChad on Instagram (not an app I'm terribly active on as far as messaging and I have literally never spoken a single word to LadyChad at this point) asking what kind of wine I had given Chad because she wanted to go out and purchase several bottles.
Um ... what? So there I am awkwardly staring at my phone already having responded to her "hi" so I can't just ghost the girl. She knows I've read her messages and am actively on my phone. Chad doesn't really talk to me, so I have no idea how I got roped into this, and I'm looking around like "WHAT DO I DO!?!?!"
Babe later assured me this is the sort of thing Chad did to him all the time and LadyChad was probably well aware that he was lying. Still, I didn't appreciate getting sucked into some elaborate Chad-scheme. If you're going to do that to people, you have to give them a heads up! One Reddit user asked:
What's the most awkward position someone's ever put you in?
... apparently the world is FULL of Chads. Get it together, guys. Stop being Chads. Here are some of my favorite responses - edited for clarity when needed. Enjoy the cringefest!
Didn't Know About The Divorce
GiphyI'm about to go for supper with my mom's new boyfriend, she's 50. I didn't know my parents were divorced.
The Invoice
GiphyMy mom sent me an "invoice" for raising me. I hadn't spoken to her in 4 years at this point. I called her to see what was up. She told me that if I don't pay the amount of the invoice, she's going to lose the house she's living in. She lamented that I was an expensive child because I had so many health issues, and how she was owed this money.
I explained to her that I wasn't responsible for my birth or the complications during my birth that she caused. She cried until I hung up, then immediately called me back with stone cold composure and told me I was no longer a part of her family. Big loss there.
Confronted By A Coworker
GiphyWas getting a drink at work and when I turned around my female coworker trapped me in a corner. She demanded to know why I don't look at her like the other guys. "I know I'm older than you but am I not pretty?" Luckily another coworker saw us and I just walked away laughing like she just told a joke.
- BigMilk0
Teacher's Erotic Poetry
GiphyMy high school English teacher read us erotic poetry she wrote about her husband... who happened to be our History teacher.
Five Minutes Of Faking It
GiphyI grew up not actively doing religious stuff and I lived in the middle of an aggressively Mormon neighborhood. One day when I was in the third grade I was invited to one of my super Mormon friends house for dinner. I went and her mother asked me to say grace. Being a stupid 10 year old with no idea how to say I didn't know how, I clasped my hands together and mumbled under my breath for five minutes. *five minutes *. I probably would of gone long if the mom didn't stop me.
I didn't have dinner with them again.
Sister or Best Friend?
GiphyRight, settle in and grab the popcorn, I've got a story for you. My sister married my best mate from college, it kinda made sense at the time because he had always been around at our house, spending time with my family etc. There were no hard feelings from me, I thought they were kinda cute and a couple. Anyhoo they get married had a huge reception were my parent spent an absolute fortune inviting probably close to 300 people, not just friends of my sister and her hubby but friends of my parents to show off to at how perfect the happy couple were.. Fast forward a couple of years and my sister and her husband had emigrated to a different country and out of the blue she calls me and asks if I can visit. So I pack my bags and go on holiday. When I arrive my sister tells me that she is getting a divorce from my mate and that she has been in a relationship with a lady on the sly for a year. So I've got my sister who now wants me to stay with her and support her through the divorce process and on the other hand I now have my best mate who is absolutely crushed as a male doubting his masculinity (as you would if your wife of 10 years just upped sticks and declared her self lesbian) who wants me to live with him and play video games and smoke pot with him every night.
I went and lived with my buddy. We got high every night, got drunk all the time and shagged everything.
I met my sisters new lady friend and we didn't gel. My sisters partner is almost as old as my mother is and I wish my sister all the best, but I struggle to connect properly with her new wife.
Acquaintance Awkwardness
GiphyAn acquaintance was crashing at my place for a night. We went out and had a fun night out together, he ends up bringing someone home. I crash while they're enjoy each other's company. I hear the front door open and close in the middle of the night and figure she's gone home.
Around noon the next day, the guest bedroom door finally opens and I hear him walking down the hallway toward where I am in the kitchen. I'm pouring a cup of coffee for him when a FEMALE VOICE says hello.
Turns out it was the acquaintance that left in the middle of the night. He left the hung-over bar-girl in my house. She and I had an awkward conversation while she drank a coffee then left.
- milesmac
A Dramatic Reading
GiphyI was waiting in a school office to be interviewed for an Art teaching position in a middle school 7 years ago.
There was another art teacher who already worked at the school in the office and she was trying to be friendly and make conversation with me.
She pulls out her cellphone and asks me my name. I tell her and she immediately logs into Facebook and finds my profile (which I left open to public at the time) and immediately starts reading my profile out loud for everyone in the office to hear.
Grindr Gone Wrong
GiphyTalking to a dude on Grindr and he invited me over. He started being way overly affectionate as soon as I stepped in the door. We had the typical "gay dudes about to hook-up chat" where we talk about work and how often we do this, etc. Things soon get hot and heavy. As soon as he was about to penetrate, he had a full on mental breakdown and started sobbing into my chest...
It went on for like 15 minutes and all I wanted to do was to get out of there! All I could do was reluctantly coddle him while he was hyperventilating over his recent breakup. We're both bare-ass naked, I've lost all libido at this point and I just prayed for him to get off me.
As soon as he calmed down, I don't think I've ever moved so fast in my life to get out of that house.
Thanksgiving Dinner
GiphyMy wife and kids and I were invited to her parents' house for Thanksgiving, along with her two sisters. While we were all around the table and the food had been served, sister number one discovered that sister number three was dating number one's ex. An angry, awkward silence ensued. The kids started asking why nobody was talking. Potatoes were passed really hard. Platters were smacked onto the table. Stink eye was amply provided to anyone over 10 who dared to speak. It was quite a celebration of love and family.
Grandma Is An Addict
GiphyMy Grandmother is currently addicted to opiods. She frequently and often texts me asking me to take her to the hospital, effectively forcing me to tell her "You need to call 911." Even though I am almost always certain it's purely so she can go in and get her high. What's more, she tries to guilt trip people who won't take her anymore, including me, saying, "Oh I can't walk! It hurts so much I can't stand!" Except we all know it's bullshit because it only ever happens within a few days of her morphine refill. Also, the fact that her doctor recommends exercise and PT really doesn't help her credibility.
It's just so awkward having to tell my own grandmother that she's addicted, that she needs to stop going to the ER for things that aren't actually emergencies, and to actually do what the doctor tells her. It's so awful actually.
"Previous Experience"
GiphyThe guy I lost my virginity to married a friend from high school. That, in of itself, would have been whatever. The awkward part happened when she reached out to me for advice because she was a virgin and was sort of worried about his "previous experience."
She didn't know that previous experience was with me...
After We've Worked An Entire Shift Together
GiphyMy boss makes me come in the room with her as a witness when she writes people up. It's awkward as f^ck because its usually after we've worked an entire shift together. I always make sure to tell them I had no idea and have nothing to do with it.
When Only One Of You Knows It's A Date
GiphyI was a freshman in college and a dude invited me to his place but worded it in a way that made it sound like other people would be there. I arrive in the same outfit I wore to band practice, and the dude opens the door wearing nice clothes. Shirt tucked in and everything. I chill with him, expecting more people would be arriving any minute, and they never do. Eventually a roommate comes out to get water and then goes back to his room. It eventually hits me that the guy is interested in me and this was some weird "date" thing. I was mortified. And in retrospect, it horrifies me that had he had really bad intentions, I willfully walked into a potentially dangerous situation. Luckily his intentions actually were just to chill with me. But I was BEYOND uninterested, and unskilled in the art of leaving places without feeling like I was rude. I think he could tell that I was caught off guard and he felt awkward as well. I mean he was dressed nice and I was in fucking band practice clothes. It was one of the most excruciating nights of my life. We had NOTHING in common and struggled for things to talk about. Cringing as I write this. Ew ew ew ew.
Grandchildren
GiphyWas hanging out with family. It was my 3 older siblings and their spouses as well as my brother who just had his first kid. That made me the only one without children. My mom proceeds to go on about how much she loves grandchildren and that I'm next and that I need to hurry up - while I'm sitting there with my girlfriend.
We had never really discussed kids at this point. I sat there having my family focus on me and ask all sorts of personal questions that I didn't want to be answering in front of everyone. It felt like an interrogation.
Oh, THAT Kind Of Tattoo
GiphyWas working at a hospital ER as a paramedic and was starting an IV on this old lady who had a thick Eastern European accent. I was finishing up and she made a comment on my tattoos on my arms and she said something about her just one tattoo and of course being friendly I asked what she got it of. She looked me in the eyes and said "Well it was something I didn't want to get" and of course I start connecting the dots and she was just about the right age to have been held in a concentration camp. It got real cold in that room all of a sudden. I had no idea what to say
"A Foot And A Half From My Genitals"
GiphyA friend in middle school accidentally kicked me in the balls, and they swelled pretty badly. This resulted in me not being able to walk properly. This worried my mom enough that she had the doc check my junk out.
This wouldn't be so awkward if he hadn't handled my balls and had his face like a foot and a half from my genitals. I was about 14 at the time, and not the "biggest" dude. That's probably the most awkward situation I've ever been in.
Caught Them Both Cheating
I caught my friend and his girlfriend both cheating with other people on separate occasions. I walked in on him and some chubby blonde girl bent over the toilet at a party - his girlfriend is a slim brunette. I walked in on his girlfriend with some black dude while I was visiting the two of them at their apartment. My friend is white and he was at work while his girlfriend was cheating. I promised both of them I wouldn't tell the other since that's not my place and I know their relationship is dysfunctional as f^ck.
The two of them started arguing one day over, surprise surprise, cheating. The both of them somehow caught wind that each other were cheating and they both started screaming at each other over it. I happened to be nearby so they both called me over. My friend said :
"Yo, you know this b!tch is cheating. Tell me who she's been f^cking!"
and she shouted:
"Don't listen to this as$hole. You know he's cheating on me. I know you've caught him before!" then pointed at me.
Neither of them knew that I had caught both of them cheating on each other.
I decided to maintain the middle ground and told them this wasn't my place to speak up. Then I quietly left while they continued to yell at each other. Knowing the two of them, an all out fist fight would have broken out between them so I decided not to say anything. They both ended up cheating on each other 2 more times, found out about both times and are still together for some reason.
Hacking
GiphyWas sent by my boss to some people she knew to help with "internet stuff."
I learned on-site they wanted me to hack into their 13-year-old daughter's Facebook account because they thought she was up to something.
"Just Wheeled Him Over"
GiphyI had to assist a friend of the family's grandfather with going to the bathroom. His daughter just wheeled him over to me and said "he needs to use the restroom" then left.
H/T: Reddit
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.