People in relationships have, at one point or other, made a huge mistake that jeopardized their future together as a couple.
Some grievances like infidelity are so beyond the pale that it's not worth continuing the relationship based on the ole' "once a cheater, always a cheater" adage.
But depending on the situation, do untrustworthy significant others deserve a second chance?
Strangers online gave their take on the issue when Redditor ChildhoodPersonal225 asked:
"People who forgave their cheating partner, what was the reason you let it go?"
Forgiveness doesn't always lead to a favorable outcome.
"I forgave my cheating partner, but it was also the reason we got divorced. You can forgive someone and still not want to be with them anymore."
"I forgave her after leaving."
"Me too. I spent a year or two upset about it, because she was in a happy relationship with the guy she cheated with. I spent that time hoping that she would do the same to him, almost certain that she would. Figured the other shoe would drop eventually and I could watch with great satisfaction from afar."
"That day never came. They stayed in love, they got married, they’ve got two daughters now. From everything I’ve heard, they have a wonderful life together. And I’m really glad that they do. What she did hurt at the time, and it was sh**ty, but we were a couple of 21 year olds who thought a three year college relationship was going to last forever. She didn’t deserve to spend her life paying for one time that she harmed me, and I didn’t deserve to waste my days waiting for karma to come back around and ruin her life."
"She got married to him the same day that I moved into an awesome apartment in my local city to live out my 20s in the most fun way possible. In a way, it felt poetic. Because of what she did, she found the person she was meant to be with and I was given the opportunity to seize life in a way I hadn’t before that."
"I wouldn’t change a thing about what happened and I have no doubt that she wouldn’t either."
Forgiving and trusting someone again is a risk many people, who are still in love, take.
"Because I was trying to understand why it is she made that decision, and I wanted to try and make the marriage work. My mistake."
"It almost always happens again. Give someone an inch, they take a mile. Next time they'll get better at hiding it."
"Not me but a friend. He didn’t want to be single again and go through the dating process. So he forgave. She cheated couple of times more and he still forgave. Ended up married. I stopped keeping up with the story because it’s always the same cheating sh*t again."
Alone For The Right Reason
"I thought that if I left her then I'd be alone forever."
"3 years after leaving her and that turned out to not be true and I also learned that being single is much better than being in a sh**ty relationship."
Things Didn't Compute
"Because I couldn't do math."
"We were dating for two months, but things got serious pretty fast. Met each other's families - this was around the holidays - and were having the talks about where we saw things going. One weekend, I come down with a really bad flu. Couldn't move out of bed, and told her I could not see her, but would be happy to talk on the phone. She tells me, 'hey, if its all the same, do you mind if I pick up another shift at the "piano bar" waitressing and make some money for the night?' I tell her, sure, I'd rather rest and try to kick this bug, go for it."
"Three months later, we're sitting on my couch and she seems distant. She tells me we need to talk, starts crying and tells me she thinks she has an STD. She tells me the night she picked up that extra shift at the bar, she stayed until closing and fucked her married boss in his car. But - and here's the kicker - she tells me, 'you and I had only been on a couple of dates up to that point and weren't exclusive,' so it wasn't like she was cheating on me, in her mind. For some reason, I couldn't put the math together to figure out which weekend it was that she took that extra shift, so I dismissed it. It wasn't until months later that the math hit me like an epiphany and, by that time, we had developed so much more as a couple that I figured it was a one-off indiscretion. (PS: She didn't have an STD, she had a yeast infection.)"
"In the end, I called things off. She was a pretty terrible person in the end, and may have cheated on me at least two more times by the time things were over. I wasted three and a half years of my life with her, but I never married her or had kids with her, which would have been way worse."
The Fear Of Nothing Being Better Than The Alternative
"I was pregnant with my second child and terrified of doing it alone. I didn't think I was capable. I was also beaten down enough to feel like I'd never have anything better. Thankfully I wised up, it's been years now and I'm still single and may be that way for the rest of my days but it doesn't scare me like it did. I'm happy and that's all that really matters."
Some people are suckers for emotional breakdowns.
"I'm a sucker for crying. One year into our relationship she confessed in tears that she cheated on me two weeks into our relationship by having sex with her ex. I forgave her and was proud of her for being honest. Two months prior to our wedding and I find out she's been screwing her boss."
"My wife's first husband slept with a sex worker on a business trip to South Korea. He used to travel there several times a year, and it became a running joke with his co-workers that he never took part in the company-provided hook ups. So, he finally gave in on one trip, and felt utterly horrible about it."
"A lot of factors went into her forgiving him over this: He'd only been with my wife (since he was 17 an she was 15,) sexually, he felt absolutely horrible about it. What's amusing is that their two kids were very young, like 10 and 6, and my wife had a feeling that something was going on and had arranged for the kids to sing a little 'YAY! DAD'S HOME!' skit when he walked in the door..."
"They divorced about 10 years later for other reasons."
Here's the thing about cheating.
Thrill Of Getting Away With It
"It is like an addiction issue. Junkies are junkies. The poison doesn't make a difference in behavior."
"Cheaters literally seek out all the time the thrill of flirting, secrecy, and yes, having power over someone else, knowing and doing something wrong and getting away with it."
"That is why most cheating couples just fizzle out when they get together after the original SO drops out. Having the poor sap / sappess getting duped is what kept them entertained, not the humping."
"Cheating doesn't just 'happen', people make it happen actively. That is why only rarely -if ever- a change actually occurs, because change doesn't happen unless the person wills it."
Accidentally On Purpose
"My favorite is when people say 'it was an accident.'"
"You accidentally sent hundreds of texts, drove to their house, spent money on them and bounced up and down on them a few hundred times?"
"Yeah, sending a mixed signal is an accident not getting down with the whole act."
"It's still hard to wrap my head around how some people can be so emotionally unaware of what their actions do to others."
People deserve a second chance.
But based on the comments above, how do you know if the person you're trusting after they broke your heart aren't prone to making the same mistake again?
As they say, "fool me once..."
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We often surprise ourselves when our opinion on something unexpectedly changes.
Maybe a TV show we thought we hated is much better than we realized, one food pairs with another surprisingly well, it is possible to go a whole day without eating cheese.
On some matters though, we find our mind has not and likely will never change.
On things both significant, such as politics, or more frivolous, such as preferring cats to dogs, or the age old cilantro battle.
Redditor itsdandyhere was curious to everything people believe they will absolutely never change their mind about, leading them to ask:
"What will you never change your mind on?"
Always Plastics On The Upper Level
"That my way of loading the dishwasher is correct."- Far_Dragonfly_3748
Everyone Has An Opinion
"Not showing dislike on youtube is a bad idea."- SuvenPan
"People who litter are terrible people."- Ok_Association555Pick Up Trash GIF by REIGiphy
It's a Safety Issue!
"People who don’t use indicators when they drive are a**holes."- Beetle_Jugo
"I'm Always Right!"
"That reevaluating your opinions when you find evidence that contradicts them is a good idea."- DodgyDuderinoYoure Wrong John C Mcginley GIFGiphy
Heartbreaking But Humane
"Sometimes it is kind and humane to euthanize an animal."
"We can’t save them all and they won’t live forever."- KatTheDogFosterer
And Then There's Science...
"Big rock in water make big splash."- DudeManBroGuy42069
"The Earth is NOT flat"- Loaki8Climate Change Earth GIFGiphy
Not A Safe Situation For Anyone.
"Dogs have no business in the lap of a person actively driving a car."- leowomanthe
Always Treat Others The Way You Want To Be Treated.
"People who treat waiters/customer service people badly are the worst type of people."- learnercow
One could easily be accused of being obstinate for being unable unwilling to change your opinion about something.
Which could very well be the case on certain matters, which can be unequivocally proven by science.
But in other matters, one should always stand firm in one's opinion, and never let anyone convince you otherwise.
After all, it will only be a matter of time until everyone realizes anchovies on pizza are delicious...
Good hygiene is important.
Not only for yourself but for others around you.
Having bad breath or a strong unpleasant bodily odor will result in an unpleasant experience for anyone in close proximity to you.
Although, sometimes we may find that despite our best efforts, we can't seem to shake the fragrance emitting from our bodies.
Making any advice people have to offer extremely valuable.
"What are some hygiene tips everyone should know?"
A Mint Won't Help...
"If you have bad breath that doesn't go away you may have tonsil stones."- wiener_dawg
Who Actually Likes Being Wet All The Time?
"Make sure your clothes get completely dry."
"You'll smell like mildew otherwise."- YakiVegas
"If something is worth doing, it's worth half-a**ing it."
"Say you're running late and need to be out the door 10 minutes ago, it's still worth giving your teeth a 10 second scrub rather than skipping it."- SharpPoetryBefore You Know It Brushing Teeth GIF by 1091Giphy
Always Make The Effort
"From someone who works in medicine literally wash your butt."
Wash First, Spray Later
"Deodorant is not meant to go on top of bad smells!"
"The bad smells come from bacteria."
"Shower first, then put deodorant on. It works by making your skin uninhabitable for bacteria."
"The nice scent is the cherry on top, the main benefit is preventing the bad smell from growing."- very-polite-frog
"I used to live in a very hot, humid place.""I found that the only thing that kept my groin area from smelling funky was to wash daily and the make sure everything got really well dried out afterwards."
"Towels didn't quite cut it."
"So, yes, I blow dry my lady garden."
"Not inside my vulva, but outside and around."
"Keeping my pubes trimmed short and changing into clean underwear often also helped."
"This also applies if you have fat rolls or loose skin folds."
"Yes, I have both."
"Wash well in between skin folds, such as under breasts and between belly rolls."
"I like Dr Bronner's soap, but any soap will do."
"Dry thoroughly afterwards."
"This will prevent smells, and will also prevent itching and rashes."
"Also, Lume deodorant works really well for these areas."
"Also, one more thing: deodorant is water resistant."
"It won't wash off by just splashing water on it."
"You need to give it a good scrub with soap to get it all the way off your skin."
"If you don't get all the old deodorant washed away, the new deodorant you apply won't work."
"It has to be fresh deodorant on clean skin."
"Even if you don't like the way your body looks, take care of it. It's where you live!"- notreallylucyhomer simpson singing GIFGiphy
Give Those Lobes A Break!
"If you wear earrings, take them off and clean frequently."- Far-Pollution9548·
Who Doesn't Love A Manicure?
"Keep your nails clean."
"Tidying your nails helps you prevent spreading germs into your mouth."- SuvenPan
Where Does Acne Really Come From?
"If you have bacne, ie back acne, lean your head forward to rinse your hair products OR wash your back thoroughly with soap after rinsing your conditioner/last product."
"Most people lean their head backward to rinse, which washes their hair products all down their back."
"If you wash with soap after, no biggie, but many people wash their body first, typically while letting the conditioner sit in their hair for a few minutes and thus rinsing after."
"In which case, you step out of the shower with hair product residue all down your back and butt."
"For some people and products, it's fine."
"For others, it causes skin irritation and acne."
"It should always be your first step in trying to eliminate bacne, just in case it's the cause for you."
"Things that can cause acne, for some people. non-exclusive list:"
'Products: soap, lotion, sunscreen, etc."
"Keep an eye out for those ones that you don't deliberately put on your skin but end up there anyway, like the hair products."
See also: laundry detergent/other laundry products."
"Finding the products that work for you and identifying the ingredients that you are sensitive or reactive to is pretty central to skin care, and yes it's an individual process unfortunately."
"Using harsh exfoliation or exfoliating too often."
"Overwashing/not moisturizing and protecting your skin enough to tolerate washing."
"Sweat left on the skin/keeping sweaty clothes on."
"Things that do not cause acne:"
"'Opening' your pores with hot water then failing to 'close' your pores with cold water after."
"Pores do not open and close, do not fluctuate in size with temp, and are always open as per their fundamental function."
"They can get clogged/filled though, so cleaning and exfoliating is good."
"This comes with a major caveat in that a diet high in sugar does have systemic impacts that can promote acne.'
"HOWEVER it is by no means a direct line between sugar consumption and acne."
"Critically, you can be a person whose acne is arguably worsened by their sugar intake and still see very little improvement from cutting sugar because one or more of the above triggers is still present."
"You can also be a person who eats sugar but manages the resulting effects, with or without conscious effort, and thus has no acne."
"Every acne ridden kid in the world has been told they should just stop eating sweets and it rarely helps because there are a LOT of easier/more fundamental things you should attempt and address before going straight to the major diet change."
"That being said it definitely has been a lifesaver for some people, so if you're stuck after trying all the things it's not a bad idea to look at."- IAintDeceasedYet
In truth, when someone gives you advice on hygiene, it's hard not to view it as a hint.
Leading us to quickly check our breath, or stealthily our armpits.
But hurtful as it may be in the moment, it's in our best interests to heed these warnings.
Why can't we just leave one another alone?
When you throw hate at someone it's just a reflection.
Or so they say.
"What is the dumbest thing you’ve ever received hate for?"
I got hate for giving a homeless man food. I said he deserved it. They said I was enabling. You can't win.
Under the Seathe little mermaid sebastian GIF by DisneyGiphy
"I painted my nursery with an under the sea theme and then was told the blue would make my daughter a lesbian."
"For having lunch with my grandma on my lunch break at work. Not joking. I serve a wide area of my state and when I’m in her part of the state, which was historically underserved by the person in my position before I was, I eat lunch with her during my lunch break."
"The other administrators I work with in parts of the state that I serve are now complaining that the only reason that part of the state is getting more attention (i.e. Equal treatment to them rather than being neglected) is because I like to have lunch with my grandmother."
The Early Days
"During my early days of the internet, there was a post on a live journal page about some woman who still breastfed her kid until he was like, 5. I commented on it saying 'I didn’t even know that was possible' and boy did people come at me. Calling me a troll just trying to rile people up, saying it was offensive... like dude, I was just 15 and honestly had no idea it was possible to breastfeed a child for that long."
"Not going to a birthday party. I know this sounds rude of me, and I did feel bad. But, I had my reasons. Back in high school, my friend was having a birthday party. At the time my dad was really ill, he was in the hospital and I wanted to be by his side."
"I told her my reason and that I wouldn’t be able to make it, but once my dad was better, I would celebrate with her in a different way. She didn’t like this, and threw a fit about it. To this day, I still don’t understand why. But, we’re no longer in contact."
Get Lettuceguinea pig eating GIFGiphy
"For putting pink or pastel rainbow fleeces in with my male guinea pigs. They’re guinea pigs…they literally don’t care. They want lettuce."
Pink or pastels are always an issue.
Only MeLook At Me Reaction GIF by WWEGiphy
"As a former people pleaser, making my own life choices instead of following other's pushy advice. Life choices that only concern me."
"I don't drink alcohol, not preachy about it, I just don't like the taste or the effect. You would think I was a mass murderer when declining, politely, a drink. I don't care if everyone else is drinking and think I'm kind of handy as a designated driver."
"I am blown away by all of the comments. Amazing at how many of us non drinkers are out there and how we share similar experiences. Thanks for sharing!"
"I have strong alcoholic genes in my family. Both my father was to his death and my brother are alcoholic. I'm evil for not drinking. Totally not wanting to not be one too, nope! Evil!"
Tell me a story...
"'Reading too much' my mom used to get mad at me, an elementary school kid, for going to the library and getting a big stack of books and reading through them all in a day. And I mean she was PISSED, she'd kick me out to go play and I would just sit outside in the grass for a few hours and wait to go back to reading lol."
I had no idea...
"For talking to a guy I met on a dating site not knowing he was in a relationship. Dude was messaging me on a dating app, we met up and he seemed cool. We hung out once, he wasn’t my type and we parted on good terms and then his fiancé called me."
"I said I was sorry, I had no idea. I stopped talking to the guy instantly but I still faced 6-8 months of harassment from this woman and her friends. I got told I wouldn’t live to see my next birthday, I got told I was fat, they called me nonstop they said that they knew where I lived, where I went to Uni."
"I even got threats on my blog that I had set up for uni. It was intense. I ended up getting the police involved. From what I know she stayed with him but somehow I was in the wrong even though I had no idea she existed. He did nothing wrong, it was all me… freaking ridiculous."
Truth be Toldblooming lisa simpson GIFGiphy
"For telling someone that I’m allergic to a certain food. (I extremely allergic to it)."
"I get so many eye-rolls when i mention I’m severely allergic to several common food ingredients. As if I woke up day and decided to make my life wildly inconvenient for the fun of it."
Don't hate us because we're beautiful.
Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Some people insist that animated movies are for children, but those prople are missing out on some amazing examples of cinema. Whether it's feel-good family friendly, musical masterpieces, or filmmakers using animation as a medium to tackle some tough issues like war and loss, here are some films you totally shouldn't miss.
Redditor CevicheCabbage asked:
"What is one animated film everyone must see at least once?"
The Iron Giant
"The Iron Giant."
"This continues to be one of my favorite movies ever."
"The story, the pacing, the beautiful animation, it’s an underrated gem of a movie!"
"Brad Bird’s finest work!"
"I wasn't trying to cry at work today, but here we are."
-PostmodernPriapismfeels love it GIFGiphy
Anything By Miyazaki, Really
"Howls Moving Castle while you're at it"
"If you need some wholesome throw in some my neighbour totoro"
"The entire Ghibli set but most important being My neighbor Totoro, because catbus"
"The Emperor's New Groove"
"The most underrated Disney film of all time in my opinion. It's hilarious, the story is great, and there's minimal singing for a Disney film. They cast the voice actors perfectly."
"Yay I'm a llama again!! Wait.."
How To Train Your Dragon
"How to train your dragon 1 and 2. I fell in love with Toothless and his sarcastic attitude on the first one."
"How to Train Your Dragon 2 got me through a significant depression period. There were days that I would get off work and have it on repeat until bedtime."
"I think 3 should be included as well. I feel a lot of people bash on it, but it formed a solid end of the trilogy IMO."
Get That Gold
"Road to El Dorado."
"The scene when the giant stone jaguar breaks out of the temple - Tulio and Miguel's quizzical glance and then screaming always makes me laugh"
- goforpoppapalpatineBoth Is Good The Road To El Dorado GIFGiphy
"Had to scroll way too far for this one. Treasure Planet is one of the greatest movies and it's a shame it got buried by Disney (by releasing it very close to Harry Potter and the chamber of secrets - some say on purpose to prove a point to the movies directors)"
"Dude I literally just remembered this morning that this movie existed, and now I plan to watch it when I get off of work! I'm wayyyy too excited to watch it again lol."
Definitely Not Happy, But Absolutely Worth It
"grave of the fireflies"
"Once, and only once."
"Those are the exact words I had in mind."
"This one. I was taught Japanese as my second language as a kid. The teachers put it on for us grade schoolers ( think 7-8 year olds). Messed me up and also gave me vast amounts of empathy at the same time. I don't like war, the people/civilians lose every time. I want to rewatch it but I just can't muster up the emotional strength."
"Definitely agree that it’s a must watch but it’s also one of the few shows I’ve watch that would make this grown man cry every time."
"Grave of the Fireflies left me with a feeling of 'I'm not going to be okay for a while' and I feel like everyone should experience that at least once."
A Goofy Movie
"A Goofy Movie"
"I would go to a Powerline concert no questions asked"
"'You ever notice how we're all, just like, wearing gloves all the time?'"
Ohana Means Family
"Lilo & Stitch. Ohana means family."
- GA Sam
"Lilo and Stitch is one of my all time favorite Disney movies, I absolutely agree with this"
"Seriously one of the movies of my childhood that has left a big, big impression on me. This scene where Nani sits with Lilo for the last time before they’re supposed to say their good byes, the authenticity of Nani singing a Hawaiian song softly. Or the way Lilo as an outsider copes with the loss of her parents. It’s all too real. It really broke my heart as a kid and does so even more now."
"It’s one of those movies that makes you truly understand complex emotions and how universal they are. It’s a wonderfully crafted movie. And hell, Stitch as cool af."
- beep-boop-im-a-robottouching lilo and stitch GIFGiphy
Prince Of Egypt
"Prince of Egypt"
"Yes! This movie was so good from the elite voice acting to Han Zimmer scoring it. Jeffery Katzenberg left Disney when they didn’t want to listen to him so he went and found Dreamworks and made the perfect film just to give Disney the middle finger"
"Yes. So much yes to this. I get chills watching that movie."
"Scrolled so far down just to see this. I love many animated films, but a must-see is definitely this masterpiece regardless of your religious affiliation."
Make sure you don't miss out on any of these absolute masterpieces!