Valentine's Day is one of those holidays that messes with people. We know it's total marketing trash created as a way to sell us stuff we don't need. Roses die, diamonds are awful, stuffed animals collect dust and your dog's just going to eat the nose off of it anyway, and none of us need that much chocolate in one sitting - at least as far as our dentists are concerned. Still, if we don't celebrate it, some of us get really really salty.
That leaves people and their partners perpetually panicking. (High fives to me for that alliteration) Do we gift? Do we not? How much? What's appropriate? By the time we figure it out, it's often way late in the game - at least in my world. If you're like that, too - no need to worry. Reddit's got you covered.
Reddit user u/Top3GamesA asked:
Reddit, whats a good last minute idea for Valentines day?
Start taking notes, folks
Being part of a healthy, fun, committed couple is honestly one of the coolest things in the world. You and your partner get a bunch of inside jokes, you've got a built-in sidekick for shenanigans, and even the really boring or terrible things are a little bit better because you're not alone. Your partner will probably be the person who makes you laugh the most, knows your secrets, and is right there by your side for all of those nights that turn into stories.
One Reddit user asked:
What's the weirdest thing you've done with your partner?
Honestly... this is all love. Some of it is really gross or probably illegal (both?) but it's all love. Here are some of the more epic responses.
H/T: Reddit
People Are Roasting Trump Over His Mind-Numbing Observation About The Wetness Of Water 😂
Donald Trump thanked the first responders who came to the aid of victims of Hurricane Florence. The storm devastated portions of North Carolina, dumping massive amounts of rain and damaging millions of dollars in property. Many natural areas were destroyed, some farmers lost everything and more than a few people have been left homeless. The first responders after this massive storm were literal life savers, and Trump was absolutely right to thank them. Unfortunately, the sentiment of his message was lost for many people because he didn't seem to put any effort or preparation into what he was saying. Then, in the middle of his off-the-cuff message, he confused everyone by talking about the wetness of water.
As Trump described the storm and the importance of first responders he told the world:
This is a tough hurricane, one of the wettest we've ever seen from the standpoint of water. Rarely have we had an experience like it and it certainly is not good.
The Tweet went out in the middle of the day on Tuesday, September 18th. At the time of this article, it hasn't even been up for 24 hours and already has over 13,000 comments. Many of them pointed out how Trump didn't even seem to try...
and how asinine his description was.
We don't know if Trump will continue to address the public by releasing these kinds of videos, or if they will continue to be as unrehearsed as this one is. We assure you, if they are, Twitter will have plenty to say about it.
H/T: Huffington Post, Twitter
My man's got this friend named Chad. Chad isn't his real name, but that's what we're going with for this article. Chad is in a relationship that is ... well ... there's a reason Facebook had to come up with the "it's complicated" status. Nobody is happy, they often go out of their way to avoid one another or are forcing performative affection for the 'gram. One night, Chad decided he was going to hide from LadyChad and told her he couldn't see her because he was spending time with us. He then made up a whole elaborate story about drinking wine (which he doesn't normally do) and overdoing it because he really liked it.
Thing is, Chad never told US that he used us as a ridiculously specific cover story.
So imagine my surprise when I get a message from LadyChad on Instagram (not an app I'm terribly active on as far as messaging and I have literally never spoken a single word to LadyChad at this point) asking what kind of wine I had given Chad because she wanted to go out and purchase several bottles.
Um ... what? So there I am awkwardly staring at my phone already having responded to her "hi" so I can't just ghost the girl. She knows I've read her messages and am actively on my phone. Chad doesn't really talk to me, so I have no idea how I got roped into this, and I'm looking around like "WHAT DO I DO!?!?!"
Babe later assured me this is the sort of thing Chad did to him all the time and LadyChad was probably well aware that he was lying. Still, I didn't appreciate getting sucked into some elaborate Chad-scheme. If you're going to do that to people, you have to give them a heads up! One Reddit user asked:
What's the most awkward position someone's ever put you in?
... apparently the world is FULL of Chads. Get it together, guys. Stop being Chads. Here are some of my favorite responses - edited for clarity when needed. Enjoy the cringefest!
H/T: Reddit
Minimum wage is crap. There. I said it. We can all stop pretending it's not. If you've never worked for minimum wage, consider yourself impossibly lucky. Those of you who have will totally get what this reddit user meant when they asked:
Minimum wage workers, what is something that is against the rules for customers to do but you aren't paid enough to actually care?
We all want to think that work ethic just is what it is, but I promise you when you make next-to-nothing it's not enough money for you to chase down a poop-covered man to try and hold him until store security gets there. Yeah, that was personal experience. Nope, I didn't even consider giving chase. Here are some of the best responses - some may have been edited for content or clarity.
H/T: Reddit