Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor Guava_ asked:
"Who is the worst kind of person to be sat next to on a long flight?"
These Redditors experienced tainted oxygen.
Olfactory Assault
"Smelly person. I mean I don't think there's anything you can do about it while on the plane."
– sweetgossip
"I’d take a big person over a smelly person, nothing is worse than someone who smells like @ss and you’re trapped…. Total violation of the senses."
– marblepudding
Foul Stench
"I once sat next to a man who smelled terrible - like a zoo animal. He was wearing a suit and tie and was visibly nervous and had sweat dripping down his face. The only item he was carrying was a Bible that he kept occasionally looking at during the 4-5 hour flight."
"Then there was one time I was on a very hot plane on the tarmac, and the German woman next to me smelled horrible and lifted her arm to wipe her armpit with a napkin, and I just wanted to be removed from the planet."
– sloppy_biography
Nose-Hair Curler
"An older woman wearing the most foul smelling perfume my nose has smelled. It was a 9 hour flight. I felt like throwing up from my headache a few hours in."
– purplehotcheeto
Poor hygiene is one thing.
Foul emissions are another.
Gas Leak
"I sat next to a dude who farted the entire 5-hour flight. I almost vomited and it was absolutely vile. I needed a huge shower once I got home. It was bad."
– quemaspuess
The Silent Ones Are Deadliest
"Ha - I sat behind and across the aisle from a guy on a 2 hour flight, who kept farting the rankest farts. After several of them, I finally said out loud, 'What the f'k - nasty' just loud enough for him to hear and looking right at him. He stopped farting after that."
"They were silent but deadly, so I think he thought no one could tell who it was. But I had been upgraded to first class on this little regional jet and it was just the two of us up there."
– sloppy_biography
Diaper Change
"I once had the people behind me change their toddler's poopy diaper right there at the seat and oh god it was awful. We all turned the vents on to blow it away but it was pretty futile. People were gagging."
– mattbnet
Noticing certain behavior made these Redditors uneasy.
Nerves
"Lowkey if I saw a guy in a suit sweating profusely casually checking his bible id get kinda nervous."
– No1shades
"I had someone sitting in front of us with a toddler that had to have it’s diaper changed twice during a 3 hour flight and that kid must have ate nothing but beans or something…seemed excessive for a short flight. I’ve had to change my daughter when we were in a flight when she was that old, but it was once…and took her to the restroom to do it. They did not."
– woundedbearhair
Poetry In Motion
"I was flying home from a college friends reunion. I was hungover and exhausted. All I wanted to do on that flight was sleep. I was seated next to a lady who was writing in a tablet. She kept looking over at me. I thought that she thought I was trying to read what she was writing. I settled back and closed my eyes. When I gave my drink request to the flight attendant, the woman next to me caught my eye. She said ‘would you like to read my poetry?’ I wasn’t hardened enough to say no, so spent the rest of the miserable flight reading and talking about her poetry."
– Walway
Time To Chat
"I'm the furthest thing from a plane chatter oh my god, my anxiety about all of it can only be controlled by sinking into my own mental space and staying there. But one time I was seated next to an old dude who clearly wanted to talk, and in spite of myself I can't help being nice to people, so I let him talk to me for awhile hoping it would just be a brief chat. Well, it wasn't. But to be fair it was because I realized that this guy really wanted someone to talk to, and the more he talked the more I realized he deserved that. He was a widowed veteran doing his best to care for his troubled adult children and he had stories to tell. The story about getting startled by a monkey while on tour in the military was hilarious. And he didn't just talk, he asked about me. I ended up telling this total stranger that I was flying for cancer treatment and showing him my surgical scars. I will never forget that guy. I wish him well. But no, this didn't make me into a plane chatter. I'm grateful that I met him but I'm just as grateful that I haven't been seated next to someone who wants to talk since."
– CharlesMansnShowTune
Pist-Off
"The guy I sat next to on a 14 hour flight that whipped out a bag of shelled pistachios right when we got on and proceeded to crack and eat them for the whole flight. Between the noise of the cracking, the soft shell pieces flying everywhere, and him sucking the shells and licking his fingers, I’m surprised I didn’t end up tackled by air Marshall and hauled off at the nearest stop."
– wayfaringlens
Armrest hoggers are the worst.
And I'm embarrassed to say I'm one of them.
Look, it's not my fault most armrests are poorly designed and aren't wide enough to accommodate the arms of both passengers on either side of them.
That being said, I try to be as respectful of the other person by giving them space to rest their arms as well. What I don't appreciate is when they casually shove my arm off entirely so they can have it all to themselves.
