Interracial Couples Reveal The Biggest Cultural Adjustments They Overcame
Interracial Couples Reveal The Biggest Cultural Adjustments They Overcame
[rebelmouse-image 18351636 is_animated_gif=Cultural stereotypes, and the judgments that accompany them, still present challenges for interracial couples. But dating someone from another culture has its perks too - different food, family celebrations, holiday traditions - all help to enrich our relationships. It's not always easy, though, as people still like to judge.
jbrown3152 asked, Redditors in interracial relationships, what was the biggest cultural adjustment you had to make?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
The Chinese ex was doing it right. Unopened and uneaten? Mine.
[rebelmouse-image 18351637 is_animated_gif=My ex-boyfriend of two years was Chinese, and I'm white (and Southern, while he'd lived most of his life in Chicago). We had some minor things like he would make fun of how much cheese I ate and I made fun of how much he learned to love sweet iced tea. But the one cultural norm we didn't even realize we didn't have in common was taking food home from special events. For white people, food left at the end of a wedding/event/banquet is for the host (whoever's paid for it) to dispose of/dispense how they like. In Chinese culture, mass to-go boxes are distributed and everyone takes home whatever they want. I remember being mortified at a wedding when my bf just snagged an entire, unopened box of cupcakes to take when we left. In my mind, he just stole cupcakes. What was so remarkable was that I thought he was being cheap and he thought I was being paranoid, and we never ever chalked it up to cultural norms. Learned this from a totally different (also Chinese) friend after we'd broken up.
Edit: I'm speaking of fancy or formal events specifically, not all get-togethers with food.
This seems like an easy adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351638 is_animated_gif=So. Many. Hugs.
Family is family is family.
[rebelmouse-image 18351639 is_animated_gif=One I can answer!
My partner is from Zimbabwe. I'm from Scotland.
The biggest culture shock by far is how every older woman is called mbuya (gran) and every older man sekuru (grandpa). From what I understand their language (Shona) doesn't seem to have a word for aunties, uncles or cousins: everyone is just your sibling, parent, grandparent or a stranger. Makes it a nightmare to work out what the 'real' relations are.
Saying "I'm full" is a no-no in many cultures, and there's always so much food.
[rebelmouse-image 18351642 is_animated_gif=Not a current relationship but a previous one. I'm white and he's Hispanic. Meeting his family was really when the cultural differences showed. His entire family was super welcoming, immediately I was included in everything and made to feel like part of the family, that was definitely not the norm in my other relationships.
I found out that even if I'm stuffed full if his mom or aunt offered me food, I better take it. To refuse for any reason was extremely rude.
Authentic Mexican food is amazing.
We did go to a Hispanic dance club together once and I was treated like trash by everyone present because of being white, but that was the only occasion of people disapproving.
We broke up because he's a terrible person, but I still miss his family.
Celebrating for no reason? Sounds like a great adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351643 is_animated_gif=My fiancée is black, I'm white/Asian. Everyone from her family is very loud but in a loving way, especially in public. So much laughing and clapping for no reason, I love it so much. My wasian family is very quiet and reserved and doesn't show much affection. Being in public and getting stared at is the biggest adjustment. Also the food. Anyone else love neckbone?
Well, this is different, and certainly an adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351644 is_animated_gif=I am dating a girl whose parents are from East Boston. They call pasta "macaroni" and red sauce/pasta sauce "gravy." WTF
Doesn't seem like much adjustment is needed here, everyone is really well-rounded.
[rebelmouse-image 18351645 is_animated_gif=Meeting her family: lots of hugs, the family is important, you always compliment how beautiful the mom is and eat all of her cooking, when the dad drinks then you must drink, anytime they invite you to an event then you drop everything and go or witness their wrath.
Her meeting my family: shoes come off the second you enter the house, be prepared to gossip with the mom, constantly receive a small sentence of wisdom from the dad.
I am Vietnamese and she is Venezuelan. Both families agree we would have beautiful children.
Edit: RIP inbox. y'all some amazing people: ;)
Mothers-in-law take a lot of adjusting.
[rebelmouse-image 18351647 is_animated_gif=White male married to a black woman here. We have been together since 1988 and have a 19 yo daughter.
I am not sure there were any real cultural adjustments. I have read about people in interracial relationships getting all kinds of blowback/disapproval but we've not experienced anything significant.
My MIL finds fault with virtually anything but that does not seem cultural though.
Tearing down cultural stereotypes is a necessary adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351648 is_animated_gif=My ex-boyfriend is Japanese. He and his family were very very proper, clean, and etiquette. The biggest thing was they were never really satisfied with his accomplishments. Every time he did something good they would always want more from him.
Edit: One thing I forgot to mention was that I'm Hispanic, and his family had some misconceived views on Hispanic/Latino people. The sister and dad thought I was going to be some sort of drug dealer or a gang member and were scared of me at first. His mom and brother thought I was going to be loud, good at dancing, and always say something in Spanish after every sentence. They were very interesting...
Learning your partner's native language shows immense dedication, and is a really noble adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351649 is_animated_gif=Learning Spanish. I married a Peruvian who speaks perfect English and so I have trouble remembering what I learn.
I like the sound of the wild Christmas.
[rebelmouse-image 18351651 is_animated_gif=My husband is Mexican and I am white. The biggest thing we genuinely notice and laugh about is how Christmas is handled.
His family - mass chaos, everyone opens presents all at the same time. There is literally trash and Christmas paper EVERYWHERE.
My family - slow, meticulous, everyone patiently waits their turn to open their gift. We legitimately have someone assigned to trash bag duty.
This happens far too often - skin color shouldn't define love.
[rebelmouse-image 18351653 is_animated_gif=It's weird getting racist side-eyes from people of the same race as me.
Whether it's interracial or sexuality, let's not judge others on how and whom they love.
[rebelmouse-image 18351654 is_animated_gif=My interracial relationship isn't an issue with most people. They normally just are disgusted because we're gay.
Hot take: visits are one thing, but having the whole family in a hospital room is really uncomfortable. It was for me.
[rebelmouse-image 18351655 is_animated_gif=I'm Hispanic, my husband is Caucasian. When someone in my family is sick, the whole family shows up. We all sit in the waiting room for a surgery, come by the house with food during a recovery. When his own father had a cardiac cath my husband didn't go with him even though he had the day off work. I went with his father and his mother and he thought it was so extra for me to go. His mentality is that I can't do anything if something goes wrong. He said if something did go wrong his mother would call him. In my family, it's a show of love, respect, and support to be at someone's sick bed, even for a routine medical procedure. His mother didn't find it strange, his sister didn't go either. It's just weird to me. When his grandma had a hip replaced he went to visit her in rehab only one time and she was there for two weeks. If it was my family, we would take shifts so she would have at least one visitor per day and one home-cooked meal.
Oh, white people...
[rebelmouse-image 18351656 is_animated_gif=Black man with a white ex here. I have plenty of these types of scenarios. My favorite is the white people who assumed we weren't together when we walked into a restaurant. My ex was absolutely incensed! I laughed because I've dealt with that ignorance on more than one occasion.
Parties for everything? Why not?!
[rebelmouse-image 18351658 is_animated_gif=White trash married into a Hispanic household.
Everything is different.
They throw parties for everything. High school graduation was a huge deal, I had to convince my parents to come because I needed a ride home afterward. His family was shocked.
We don't cook when people come over. Just buy some pizza. His mom might kill me if I throw a party without cooking a bunch of homemade food.
Sleepovers, family coming over? Then it's assumed they will stay the night. Totally threw me off. Our family barely visits and when they do it's for a few hours then they're gone.
Is someone pregnant? Awesome huge parties and lots of gifts. My family? That sucks better figure out what you're gonna do.
Kids party? Lots of games n food n cake and gifts. My family, oh cool here's a t-shirt I have work so I'm gonna leave now.
A family member needs help? They're family best go help. My side? The most you'll get is a 'that sucks' there's no helping each other.
Been about 6 years now and I'm still learning.
The concept of "on time" varies greatly from culture to culture.
[rebelmouse-image 18351659 is_animated_gif=Different understanding of time.
Edit: to be clear she is latina and I am white. Doesn't make me mad, it's just a difference in culture. It's an adjustment I have to make.
It takes a lot of courage to stand up to white supremacy. Sounds like the stepdad needs the adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351660 is_animated_gif=I'm black and I'm currently dating a white guy. His stepdad is a white supremacist, so going to his house always feels a little awkward.
Expanding your taste in food is one of the best ways to experience other cultures.
[rebelmouse-image 18349417 is_animated_gif=When I'm in a relationship I tend to eat less Asian foods to accommodate their tastes. I'm Asian-American and grew up eating a variety of foods. It was hard to adjust in the beginning because the people I tend to date (primarily small-town White-Americans) have a limited food palette.
Right now my current S/O has a very wide range of palette which I'm super duper grateful for. We've eaten a large array of ethnic foods compared to my previous relationships, but just not Asian dishes yet lol. Mostly due to us not traveling out of the city, where it primarily dominated by Thai, to the suburbs where there different facets of Chinese cuisines.
It's fascinating that dancing never caught on as part of American culture. But it's never too late to try!
[rebelmouse-image 18351661 is_animated_gif=I'm a boring white American and my fiance is Puerto Rican. Everyone dances, and dances well, except for me of course.
'Captain Marvel' May Have Just Introduced A New Black Female Superhero Right Under Our Noses
Warning: Minor spoilers ahead.
Nothing is a coincidence in the complex Marvel Cinematic Universe.
Now that Marvel Studios and Disney finally gave a female superhero her own movie, we realize Captain Marvel may have introduced a young character who takes on a more significant role in the future of the MCU.
The '90s-set origin story is led by the dual personalities of Carol Danvers — a U.S. Air Force pilot; and Vers, a Kree from the planet Hala in another life — and becomes Captain Marvel, expertly played by Brie Larson.
Without sounding too cryptic, Captain Marvel is the sum of Carol and Vers, and the complex narrative revolves around Vers finding out about her past.
Captain Marvel introduces us to a varied ensemble of personalities, including a young Nick Fury, played by Samuel L. Jackson, with whom she teams to fight off shape-shifting aliens called skrulls.
Instead of relying on a male love interest, Danvers has a best friend in Maria Rambeau, played by Lashana Lynch, giving the genre a refreshing feminist twist on the buddy action flick.
But it's Maria Rambeau's daughter Monica (Akira Akbar) who is making ardent fans giddy with anticipation about the character's future.
the future is beautiful and your name is monica rambeau https://t.co/HtNuXrWaZL— captain carol ︽✵︽ (@captain carol ︽✵︽) 1551819911.0
The precocious 11-year-old is, for all intents and purposes, just an adorable, "normal" kid who has ambitions of flying in the Air Force to emulate "Auntie Carol."
Monica's bravery belies her age as she encourages her mother to flee into space at the risk of never seeing her again for a mission involving the skrulls.
But there is more to her intelligence and inherent altruism, and those familiar with the comics are aware of her exciting destiny.
Refinery 29 revealed that the adult Monica Rambeau is just another iteration of Captain Marvel, and she is expected to come into prominence during the supposed 24-year time gap between Captain Marvel and Avengers: Endgame.
T'Challa is in the MCU Carol Danvers is in the MCU Monica Rambeau is in the MCU Y'all we are so close! https://t.co/rilnRAoErT— Raymond X (@Raymond X) 1552076618.0
Monica's origin story includes being a lieutenant in the New Orleans harbor patrol who comes into contact with "extra-dimensional energy" while preventing the creation of a powerful weapon.
As a result, she is able to manipulate, absorb and create energy.
Give Monica Rambeau her things!!!!— Ira Madison III (@Ira Madison III) 1552331197.0
According to the Hollywood Reporter, Monica is the second of six characters to take on the name of Captain Marvel and becomes the leader of the Avengers. She eventually adopts the codenames: Photon, Pulsar and in 2013, Spectrum.
✴️ monica rambeau: captain marvel | photon | pulsar | spectrum reading guide ✴️ https://t.co/etPruwZfbA— val saw captain marvel (@val saw captain marvel) 1552160876.0
The multifarious identities are complex for the uninitiated, for sure.
This might help:
In #captainMarvel they introduce the daughter of Monica Rambeau. Her name is also Monica Rambeau. In 2019 she would… https://t.co/MZMR6Cjcqm— Marc Dirix (@Marc Dirix) 1552071449.0
Fans are keeping their fingers crossed in the hopes that we'll be seeing the black female superhero's destiny realized.
Is anyone hoping that little Monica Rambeau is all grown up and busts into Avengers headquarters to show up the Sci… https://t.co/T56AX95nOC— Liz Nicole (@Liz Nicole) 1552015405.0
I know they didn’t give me all those heroic closeups of baby Monica for no reason. @ Marvel GIVE US MONICA RAMBEAU https://t.co/ECp8TlrPpQ— Eartha Snit (@Eartha Snit) 1552011810.0
Monica Rambeau and all of her code names getting ready for the next phase of the MCU https://t.co/o87qOdsoBo— Child of Hazel and Smoke (@Child of Hazel and Smoke) 1552257376.0
fun fact: maria’s daughter monica rambeau actually becomes captain marvel in the future and becomes the leader of t… https://t.co/pzzVyfHMf7— natasha ☾ | SAW CAPTAIN MARVEL !!! (@natasha ☾ | SAW CAPTAIN MARVEL !!!) 1552208712.0
The #CaptainMarvel trailer didn't do a good job. With this piece, I wanted to be clear that this film is for Black… https://t.co/3hckZUDltH— Jaleesa Lashay Diaz (@Jaleesa Lashay Diaz) 1552069934.0
I want a sequel yesterday. I just don’t know where they will have it. Will it take place in the past? (So much more… https://t.co/taq2pR4NyN— RoboFan (@RoboFan) 1552018976.0
@MarvelStudios Monica Rambeau! #CaptainMarvel I can't wait for her to get her powers! https://t.co/CCQ9P3iFFV— Jason (Captain Marvel did THAT) (@Jason (Captain Marvel did THAT)) 1551802986.0
I also freaked when Maria finally called her daughter Monica and I was like THERE SHE IS, MY GIRL, MY STAR MONICA RAMBEAU— Becca 💛 ECCC Q8 (@Becca 💛 ECCC Q8) 1552063569.0
As we've seen in Black Panther, the emergence of more black female superheroes is encouraging, and the seed planted with Monica Rambeau in Captain Marvel augurs a bright and exciting future for the MCU.
People Are Roasting Trump Over His Mind-Numbing Observation About The Wetness Of Water 😂
Donald Trump thanked the first responders who came to the aid of victims of Hurricane Florence. The storm devastated portions of North Carolina, dumping massive amounts of rain and damaging millions of dollars in property. Many natural areas were destroyed, some farmers lost everything and more than a few people have been left homeless. The first responders after this massive storm were literal life savers, and Trump was absolutely right to thank them. Unfortunately, the sentiment of his message was lost for many people because he didn't seem to put any effort or preparation into what he was saying. Then, in the middle of his off-the-cuff message, he confused everyone by talking about the wetness of water.
As Trump described the storm and the importance of first responders he told the world:
This is a tough hurricane, one of the wettest we've ever seen from the standpoint of water. Rarely have we had an experience like it and it certainly is not good.
The Tweet went out in the middle of the day on Tuesday, September 18th. At the time of this article, it hasn't even been up for 24 hours and already has over 13,000 comments. Many of them pointed out how Trump didn't even seem to try...
and how asinine his description was.
We don't know if Trump will continue to address the public by releasing these kinds of videos, or if they will continue to be as unrehearsed as this one is. We assure you, if they are, Twitter will have plenty to say about it.
H/T: Huffington Post, Twitter
Michael C. Hall Is Starring In A One-Night-Only Broadway Musical About Skittles—And No, We're Not Making This Up
Super Bowl Sunday: it's the only time when commercials are more popular than the show they interrupt. However, this year's best ad might not even be on TV.
Funny, irreverent, and sometimes controversial, Super Bowl ads have become as much of an event as the big game itself. Even those who don't watch football will tune in and watch as brands fight it out for the most talked about commercial of the year.
For advertisers though, getting your ad in front of one of the largest television audiences out there doesn't come cheap. A 30-second spot for this year could cost up to $5 million!
Candy maker Skittles decided to skip the Super Bowl and head for Broadway. For one-night-only, Skittles The Musical will appear on Broadway starring everyone's favorite serial killer, Dexter actor Michael C. Hall. No, we're not kidding.
The concept has so many people scratching their heads that Skittles needed to make another ad just to explain it.
Skittles The Musical ))) Starring Michael C. Hallwww.youtube.com
Anxious over appearing in the musical Hall sits down with a therapist, who like the rest of us is not exactly sure what it is. Hall explains the 30 minute advertisement is a real musical, you even have to buy tickets to go see it.
At one point Skittles even takes a self-deprecating jab at themselves and Hall, implying the musical is a terrible career decision.
After all, who is going to pay $207 a ticket to go see a 30 minute advertisement for Skittles?
A whole lot of people apparently
Tickets to the performance at the Town Hall theater in New York are almost sold out. People may not know what's going on, but they are ready to taste the rainbow.
@Skittles I’m ready! Purchased my tickets #SkittlesTheMusical— Corey (@Corey) 1548091647.0
@playbill @Skittles https://t.co/uo9aLkDV2f— robbie. (@robbie.) 1548135341.0
@playbill @Skittles My mind is blown and my heart is warmed. How fun! “Broadway the rainbow” indeed ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜— Allison Wonderland (@Allison Wonderland) 1548185407.0
If someone takes me to see skittles the musical I'll love them forever.— ☆Bambi☆ (@☆Bambi☆) 1548218569.0
On its surface Skittles The Musical may just look like an over the top gag from a brand known for its unusual marketing, but Skittles recruited some serious Broadway talent to put it together including playwright Will Eno and a cast straight from some of the biggest shows on Broadway.
According to Skittles the show will take "an absurdly self-reflective look at consumerism and the ever-increasing pervasiveness of brand advertising in our lives."
And if that wasn't enough Skittles will also be donating all the proceeds from the show to Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS. Skittles parent company will match that donation up to $50,000. You had our attention Skittles, now you have our interest.
Wait so rather than spend a bucket load of 💰to take out a 30sec ad during the SuperBowl, @Skittles will present a L… https://t.co/OVnNQfQ506— Christopher D. Clegg (@Christopher D. Clegg) 1548096836.0
@cadimy @playbill @Skittles If you read the article, it addresses that they're doing a short show in lieu of a supe… https://t.co/3Hxm2lNLyI— a dope ghost (@a dope ghost) 1548094203.0
@lnternetqueer @playbill @Skittles well that's quite neat!— 🦇 (@🦇) 1548094980.0
There is no telling how a commercial/Broadway musical from the bizarre minds over at Skittles will turn out, but it's guaranteed to be an performace like Broadway has never seen before.
Kenan Thompson Just Hit The Ice With Other 'Mighty Ducks' Cast Members, And The Nostalgia Is Real Y'all 😍
A mini-reunion took place over the weekend, as actors from the Mighty Ducks film series met up at an ice rink in upstate New York. Afterwards, they attended an Anaheim Duck's game.
The nostalgia-fest started with Danny Tamberelli, who played Tommy Duncan in the first film, posting photos of the group to his Instagram.
They wore recreations of the bright green jerseys the team wore in the movie.
Watching them, you can almost hear the whine of your old VHS player.
@EW Luv this— christy hale (@christy hale) 1548122543.0
@EW https://t.co/qsDIs6qCFA— Edward Sanchez (@Edward Sanchez) 1548121751.0
There was a Mighty Ducks reunion at an NHL hockey game yesterday. Question of the day: Who watched the Mighty Duc… https://t.co/E2XfitCRBO— Ty Andrew Darbonne (@Ty Andrew Darbonne) 1548162147.0
I want to watch all the Mighty Ducks movies again after seeing the mini-reunion photos. https://t.co/R7YmvBhoXG— Sam (@Sam) 1548147775.0
He was joined by Kenan Thompson, Vincent LaRusso, Colombe Jacobsen-Derstine, and Garette Ratliff Henson. All five acted in at least one of the Mighty Ducks movies.
After the fun of skating around the ice rink, the group switched jerseys to the more modern Anaheim Ducks design. They wore personalized jerseys with the names of their characters on the back.
The Anaheim Ducks account posted about it on Twitter.
Some mighty great people joined us at today’s game! Some of your favorite Mighty Ducks visited us on Long Island a… https://t.co/k9g8iyWMAr— Anaheim Ducks (@Anaheim Ducks) 1548032893.0
People were tagging their friends to let them know!
@LissaBriana @movieweb Omg that’s awesome— Brittany S. (@Brittany S.) 1548112054.0
@kevinlembke @movieweb Lol yeah I saw. Ducks got shut out tho lmao— space oddity (@space oddity) 1548109701.0
The group got to watch a game the actual sports team started because of the popularity of their movie, played on Sunday against the New York Islanders.
The original film starred Emilio Estevez as Gordon Bombay, a lawyer charged with drunk driving, who has to perform 500 hours of community service. Because of his background as a child hockey star, Bombay is ordered to coach a peewee hockey team. While initially reluctant, he guides the misfits to victory.
Danny Tamberelli, Garette Ratliff Henson, and Vincent LaRusso starred in the first film, while Kenan Thompson and Colombe Jaconsen-Derstine were in the second.
It's unknown at this time why the group reunited, though some are speculating for a Superbowl commercial.
But we have to ask the real questions here.
Best sports movie reunion? RT for The Sandlot Like for Mighty Ducks https://t.co/QSsGmJcpkG— Adam Navarrete (@Adam Navarrete) 1548109324.0
And yes, obviously Estevez would return as an older drunker Gordon Bombay who now sharpens skates like my boy Hans— Scott Sweeney (@Scott Sweeney) 1548103145.0