Just kidding, nobody expects you to hide totally non-sexual pieces of your body just to make others comfortable. But you need to know... forearms. Forearms, fam.
Reddit user tycooperaow asked:
"Women of Reddit, what is a non-sexual thing a guy did that turned you on?"
Scrunching your shirt to show your forearms is (clearly) my answer, but there's tons of innocuous stuff y'all are out here doing that have people down bad. Fiending. Craving. Thirsting...
Dinner And Desert
GIF by ShamelessGiphy"When we're cooking together. He is just chopping some vegetables and here I am getting turned on."
- flake5991
"Honestly cooking together is a very successful dating strategy for me."
"Have someone over and say you'll cook them a meal, they'll probably end up helping you and it's become an activity you guys do together."
"Then you eat the food, clean up, then before you know it you're in bed for desert."
- writingwithmovement
Driving 'Em Wild
Reverse Richard Hammond GIF by DriveTribeGiphy"Putting his hand behind the passenger seat and looking over his shoulder to reverse the car, pheww"
- subjectivevalue01
"You know he's about to finesse the hell outta that reverse."
- smol_boi-_-
"I remember once, on whatever freeway that is between Philadelphia and Baltimore, I was driving late at night with my then-girfriend and our baby daughter in the back seat."
"At one point doing the drive, I easily navigated a difficult stretch with one hand while singing 'Always Something There To Remind Me.' "
"My girlfriend, out of nowhere, declared 'I love you.' "
- ATAlum
"I agree, I get jitters in my nethers whenever my boyfriend reverses the car like that so effortlessly 😩"
- Poliwhirlers
"Second this, idk why but dang it's such a turn on."
- _throwaway26374859
Getting Personal
season 4 massage GIF by Chicago MedGiphy"Giving me a back rub."
"It doesn't start sexual, but after years of giving them to guys for a solid 15-30 minutes at a time (my arm was dead!) who wouldn't do it back for more than two swipes of their arm; a legitimate back rub is so appreciated and immediately turns me on."
"In general though, anything they do just to make my life easier and better on their own without my prodding."
"I noticed tons of things about my past partners (favorite food, favorite game, comfort tv show, comfort topics, comfort activities) that I would actively try to engage them in or give them when I can tell they're having a bad day."
"They don't ask. I just do trying to make them feel better."
"It so rarely happens where my stuff like that gets noticed that when it does, it's just amazing and appreciated and is immediate 'take me now.' "
"I don't mean chores or cooking help to make my life easier, I mean 'I've noticed you get happy and excited around these topics/things and you feel crappy. I'm gonna talk about these things/topics and just let you go deep.' "
"Chores and cooking help is nice, but it's not personal. Personalized help on a bad day is just amazing."
- musryujidt
Heathen Hugs
Kate Mckinnon Flirt GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Hugging me from behind. Poor guy just wants a hug and my first response is always to wiggle my butt like a dirty heathen."
- mikasa_517
"Uff the hugging from behind is my weakness too!"
- random_star0350
"Let me urge you to be a dirty heathen every time."
- deathbyhours
"Oh that booty wiggle is something else"
- steamenginetrain
Choreplay
cleaning up mr clean GIF by ADWEEKGiphy"First time I had my now-husband over for dinner at my house, he immediately got up and started doing dishes after he was done eating."
"Married 4 years now and it still gets me going every time."
- Dragoness42
"Choreplay is 100% real. I text her a picture of me doing laundry and dishes while she's out with her girlfriend(s)? She's jumping my bones the moment she gets home."
- throwawayspank1017
"I remember reading a Suzanne Brockmann book (Night Watch). The woman returns with bags of groceries."
"The guy (not yet a boyfriend) is on the phone, but he automatically reaches out to start bringing in the groceries and help put them away."
"I'm like, Suzanne Brockmann, you GET it. That is so hot."
- moonbeamcrazyeyes
"I figured this out many years ago. Women get horny when the house is clean and they didn't do any cleaning."
- teneggomlette
These Actors Seemed Miscast But Absolutely Nailed The Role | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
The Actors Who Seemed Miscast But Absolutely Nailed The RoleFew people bought into the idea of Bryan Cranston in the role of Walter White before Breaking Bad...The Reverse Clark Kent
justice league glasses GIF by DC ComicsGiphy"When a guy doesn't mention he has glasses until he needs them to read or to drive in the dark, then puts them on outta nowhere. Oof."
- Minnie7831000
"When my husband puts his glasses on.... 😈😈😈"
- ainjel
"They normally wear contacts, so seeing them in glasses is a big and nice shock"
- XenaSerenity
"Reverse Clark Kent."
- Ascholay
Monkey Brain
Beauty And The Beast Dance GIFGiphy"When he's a good Dad to our kid. Nothing makes me love him more than watching him play with, or snuggle, our 9 year old daughter."
"He's always been a good Daddy."
"Whenever I see it I get the happy clenches in my heart :)"
- littlegingerfae
"My wife always said that too. Seeing me just stop everything to take time with the kids to play or teach warmed her up."
- TenuousOgre
"I'm childfree by choice and don't even enjoy being around children. But every time I see him being great with kids I get all ... squirmy. Some SERIOUS monkey brain action here."
- [Reddit]
I Told You!
bash stanton GIF by MLBGiphy"Aw man, just saw a dude in 3/4 sleeve baseball shirt the other day. I started feeling ashamed for objectifying his forearms so much."
"Worked with this guy for months. I had no idea his forearms were so attractive. I had no idea I found forearms attractive."
- Princessfootinmouth
"Not a woman, but my girlfriends tell me rolled up sleeves showing off forearm does it for them."
- rudalsfg
"I had a girlfriend who loved watching me button the cuff buttons on a dress shirt. Something about the motion of it."
"Never understood it, but always made sure she was in plain sight when I had to button them."
- AmigoDelDiabla
"I'm a little guy, and never had big forearms."
"I had a new girlfriend about 15 years ago. I had just purchased a button up that had a little strap and button for the half rolled sleeve look."
"I came out of the house to meet her with her dog. She tells me later that shirt with the exposed arms is what sealed the deal for her. I laughed because if my forearms worked, any would."
- maaaatttt_Damon
Handle It
I Can Handle It Fast And Furious GIF by The Fast SagaGiphy"I am not a women but I can give a good example of a non-sexual thing leading to amazing sex."
"Long story short, wife and I heading off on a long road trip, had car trouble on day one. I dealt with it and we got moving again."
"I didn't think much of it."
"We got to our hotel that night and she was like a wild woman, it was extraordinary."
"I was like, 'wow!' and she said, 'I've wanted to do you so bad since you got that car going.' "
"So yeah, maybe just handling a problem?"
- Stumpytoes
"Taking charge and taking care of things."
- Ascholay
Talent
Kelly Clarkson Nbc GIF by The VoiceGiphy"Some one being really good at something."
"Like, say a brilliant piano player who really knows how to handle the piano, or a scientist who is insanely intelligent, or a craftsman who can carve beautiful things."
"Straight away I think: 'yes baby, handle me like that piece of wood, you sexy stranger with incredible talent.' "
- turdusphilomenos
Confusingly Sexy
"So this isn't like most of the comments I'm seeing here but I still question to this day why this turned me on."
"We were playing Dungeons and Dragons. My DM was in character as someone we were fighting and threatened the party."
"I cannot remember what the hell he said, but I distinctly remember sitting there for a while thinking 'why is THAT of all things turning me on?' I guess I'm into magic and threats?"
- opalrosehawk
Oh Look, We're Talking About Forearms Again
Oprah Winfrey Wow GIFGiphy"My husband's best friend from childhood opened a bottle with his forearm."
"Something about that was just Soooo Sexy."
"I mentioned it later to my husband (the trick, not that I thought it was sexy) and he said 'Who do you think taught him that?' "
"And yes, he demonstrated."
"And yes, it was still very sexy!"
- ZubLor
"I'm a simple lass. Rolled up sleeves on a button down shirt with the top few buttons undone is like catnip."
"Can't even really explain it beyond that, it just does something for me."
- BasketSweet2737
Be Free
The Kid Mero Dance GIF by Desus & MeroGiphy"Generally just not giving a f*ck about what anyone thinks of him."
"He will dance and be goofy as hell in public without a care in the world. He's just living life to have a good time while making other people's lives better in the process."
"We've been together for eleven years."
"Just not giving a f*ck about expected societal constructs is so attractive to me. Men who aren't 'just trying to do all of the things that society expects of them' are sexy."
"Just be you and forget all of the fake social media pics and captions and what your deranged family might think of you. Don't live a lie."
- jolly_poison85
Focus
dynasties GIF by BBC AmericaGiphy"When a man is thinking, focused, in a thoughtful act."
"He could be helping his Old People or his children, immersed in his favorite sport or hobby, talking about something that is important to him, relating to a pet, ribbing his friends, laughing subtly about something really funny."
"Doesn't matter. It's all sexier when he's focused."
- rsogoodlooking
Stretch
Gym Stretch GIF by Chance The RapperGiphy"Ugh my best friend who I'm really attracted to... Has the body of a GOD and if he ever stretches/yawns and I get that one little inch of lower torso when his shirt pulls up I'm DONE."
- tofutti770
"Bro anybody stretching is so f*cking hot…men and women. You can NOT prove me wrong like damn that's sexy"
- Kandle13
Best Vacay Ever
knight ok GIFGiphy"A guy riding a horse! I love horses and a guy that knows how to ride is just so sexy."
"And I love guys with long hair."
"We went to Medieval Times once and it was like a freakin fantasy for me. Mmmmm."
- mslm90
A Screwdriver
jim carrey screwdriver GIFGiphy"Not bragging but I was putting away dishes and mentioned my frying pan handle was loose."
"Without missing a beat, my boyfriend pulled a screwdriver out of nowhere and tightened it. Literally the hottest thing I have ever seen in my life and I've lived a good one."
- Archeressrabbit
Don't Panic
Ross Geller Friends GIFGiphy"I remember I went out to lunch with a co-worker. The server came over before I was ready to order, and I panicked."
"He looked at me and casually said 'the fajitas here are great.' I nodded, and he turned to the server and announced 'two fajita plates, please.' "
"Turned back to me and said 'water? Or something else?' I mumbled water, and he pleasantly turned to the server, smiled politely and said 'just a couple of waters.' "
"Now, I had never had a guy order for me. I always thought it would be something I would even get a little miffed at."
"Maybe it was him recognizing my panic, and just trying to help."
"Maybe it was the way he was so pleasant and charming about it."
"Maybe it was because I am used to staring at my children and insisting they make a f*cking choice about the food so the nice server can go about their darn job."
"But God damn, having someone else handle the ordering business with that kind of dignity and confidence... got me all sorts of hot and bothered in an unexpected way."
- Princessfootinmouth
A Subway Seat
Happy Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt GIFGiphy"Stranger on the subway asked me to save his seat."
"I was very confused, but couldn't stop watching as he dashed halfway down the car to ask an elderly lady if she wanted a seat. She was fine standing so he came back and I was blushing the rest of the way home."
- kickingtenshi
Studious And Attentive
Austin Powers Flirting GIFGiphy"Be extremely good at pool. Like pool shark status."
"I've hung out with two guys in the past who you'd never guess it and then next thing you know, they're banking the entire table in like two goes."
"Just the way they studiously approach it and pace around the table, eyes so attentive…"
- ultravioletblueberry
What did I tell you about the forearm thing? I wasn't kidding!
Forearms. Men, women, nonbinary folk, genderfull friends, cryptids... hear me. Take note.
Forearms.
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If You're Nasty.
GiphyHow often we are called a nasty name for turning down someone's advances. 5nitch
Futon Creep.
My boyfriend and I went to pick up a futon we had bought from a yard sale site, we went to the guys house. It was dark at the time because it was the only time that worked for us all. When we got out of the car to go inside I made a quick scan of my surroundings and made a note that there was a shovel leaned up against the house, and there were bricks in a little garden area.
The man we were getting it from made a joke about being trusting to come at night and it TERRIFIED me, and I was thinking "okay I know where there are items I can use to defend myself at least, if something happens." The whole time they were carrying the futon out I made sure to not take my eyes off the man. Things ended up fine, but I told my boyfriend about it in the car and he was so shocked and said he never even had the slightest feeling of danger or distrust. lander_nedla
Walking Around.
Yeap. I took a creative writing class in college where I guy wrote a poem about how racist it is for women to be afraid of walking next to him on the street at night (he was Latino) and while yeah I'm sure some people are doing it because of his race, I always thought he was missing the bigger picture of all unknown men are a potential threat to women. You best believe I never walk alone next to a man I don't know. kickingboys
Wasted Energy.
The non-stop mental energy we devote to maintaining our safety. In public, at work, in every interaction we have with a man we don't know well (and sadly sometimes also with men we do know well), in our homes, in our cars, on the internet... it doesn't ever stop. I'm not saying I live my life in fear. It's so ingrained that I wouldn't even personally call it a burden but it's certainly additional mental red tape. Every single decision or circumstance needs to be evaluate, often instantaneously. whitezhang
The Climax!
GiphyJust because penetration is enough to get you off doesn't mean it's enough to get us off. Least-Gap
YES! Even my poor husband, bless him, still has trouble understanding this! Like if we do certain positions that don't do anything for my clit, he doesn't get that I'm not going to climax from just that.
He's very sweet and does always make sure I finish before he does - he just gets confused when a position isn't doing it for me lol. thhungryduckling
"Women are like this. Women like that..."
We are not all the same. We have different opinions and taste. I met a lot of Men over the years that think that we are all kind of similar. "Women are like this. Women like that..." No. For example, some Women like shopping, other don't.
If we tried to know each others as persons, things would be a lot better. sonia72quebec
"prove them wrong"
How people tend to automatically question what you say, or address it as though you're unsure or you're asking them. Guys tend to have their words accepted, or only questioned after the fact.
How people tend to automatically undermine or dismiss your authority, regardless of your position.
You sometimes have to escalate a situation that should be minor or not an issue at all. You also have your ability questioned or assumed as substandard until you "prove them wrong."
How your accomplishments will be questioned or undermined. You finally get the opportunity to try and succeed? The standards were lowered. You slept with your grader. You cheated. It wasn't really that difficult, and so on. DC_MEDO_still_lost
BOOBS.
Having big boobs sucks. Okay yeah they're squishy sure and you can bury your face in them because for whatever reason you enjoy doing that but from my personal experience... they are a damned nuisance. Starting from when I was a kid, boys used to try to throw shit down my shirts, it became such a big problem that the principal got involved and that was humiliating. Then in high school my best friend and I were called "the DD twins" that was damn annoying.
Then also in high school I went to get my nails done at some nail salon and the two lady owners wouldn't stop grabbing them, they also didn't speak English well so idk wtf they were doing?!? Again in high school I was top student and won an award. My parents showed up to watch me walk across the stage to accept it and last minute the principal told me I couldn't go get my award because of my outfit. Meanwhile other girls were wearing spaghetti straps. My mom confronted the principal and he admitted it was because the shirt made my boobs look too big.
Wtf!! Also, I have to wear two sports bras to do any exercise. After two kids that were near suffocated while breastfeeding, my boobs now practically touch my knees. I can't ever find clothing that fits over my boobs and isn't a tent everywhere else. The hurt after I take my bra off. If I lay on my back they touch my chin and that's an awful feeling. The list could go on forever. Seriously, they suck. NoSpring4
Commonalities.
GiphyThat women's general motivations in life are not significantly different from men's, and that women are no more of a monolith of motivational drives than men are.
Basically, we're just like you in the brain. With all the complexity that involves. RedshiftSinger
Are You Sure?
Men don't understand what it's like to have people always discourage you from big career goals/undertakings. I am applying to medical school and I can't tell you how many people try to discourage me because "when will you have kids?".... btw, not even sure I want kids at all. It sucks, feels like people think your only value is in being a homemaker
And even if they don't give motherhood as a reason to discourage me, I still get met with ".... wow! Really? You want to be a doctor? That's a big undertaking/very competitive... are you sure?" And I can't help but wonder if a man would get those same responses on the regular
*EDIT: I know medical school is indeed a big undertaking/very competitive and that a lot of males probably get discouraged too. miss_appa
Pills.
GiphyThe pill isn't just to prevent pregnancy. It makes your periods more manageable. Some of us bleed heavily enough to be anemic without it. rapidecroche
Padded....
Pads don't literally attach to your vagina. Christmaspoptart
Just asked my husband where he thinks pads go and he confidently said the wings stick to your thighs. They really have no clue, god forbid he'd have to teach our future daughter these things. EdgarAlansHoe
"ok, got it"
We cannot hold in menses. A menstruating vagina is like an open wound, it just bleeds sporadically when it wants to.
I wish we could just hold it and expel it in one go, that'd be awesome! greffedufois
Is this an American thing I'm too Asian to get? Every male that I've interacted with about periods have been more like "ok, got it". I've even had male colleagues give me pain killers (even tea) when I tell them I have cramps. KoishiChan92
No Fear.
It's not necessarily personal when we're wary or afraid of you-it's the men before you that have shown that we need to be careful. When you're at a physical disadvantage that fear heightens no matter the intentions of the other party. zoeyjax
Don't Follow.
GiphyBeing followed in a car. In my college years I had someone follow me on side streets (my car couldn't handle the freeway so I took a long route home) for almost 20 miles. Instead of going home, I parked in the police station down the street from my house and the guy following me drove away. One of the scariest nights of my life. othybear
Leave Me Alone!
Period cramps and how painful they can be.
Some days I'm literally writhing on the couch from the pain and not even ibuprofin or ice can help. It can last hours and it feels like someone is constantly chewing my uterus with sharp fangs. If I say I'm staying home from work/school for period cramps, I'm not being a wimp. I cannot even think through the pain. It's not every period that I get them that bad but when I do, hooo boy. frostbirb
BOOM!!
The real landmine that is responding to DMs. If I ignore you, I'm a b!tch. If I'm friendly, I'm leading you on. If I tell you I'm married right off the bat, I'm conceited for assuming that you were trying to flirt with me (even if you very clearly were). PixelLaurs
the size of it....
That the threat of being physically overpowered feels very real. Not just in the context of being assaulted, but in general. The lingering feeling that if this dude really wanted to he could kill me with his bare hands. I guess this could be gender nonspecific, but being generally on edge and female doesn't help with the "sizing people up in case they try to lunge a me or something" issue. Just being smaller than anyone sort of puts me on edge, and I've heard from other women they have similar thoughts. hellhoundMcdogpound33
Tech No Support.
The fact that I have to often prove to my male coworkers and customers that I, shockingly, do in fact know what I'm talking about at work. Never mind the fact that I have a degree. It's usually customers, but when they expect a man, they will question everything you try to do to resolve their problem. Sorry boss, I'm not a slow worker, it just takes 2x as long to get the customer to trust me (tech support). Canadian_Toast
Got a Pen?
Giphy- How scary it is every time you go out at night alone, whether it's walking to your car or getting gas
- How expensive bras are. The first bra I've ever had thats been fully supportive was $105. My others, that don't do stuff, are $30-60
- What's with the luxury tax on tampons and pads? How are those luxuries? How are those considered luxuries, but condoms aren't? People aren't gonna stop having sex, but there is no easy way at all out of your period (plus the ruined clothes and sheets)
- Oh and I can't forget about my chronic back pain from 10% of my body weight being on my chest. moistmemes024
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