When people hear the term "teen mom," there are typically negative connotations that come to mind.
But in the Reddit community, all kinds of experiences have been had involving teen moms, both positive and negative.
Redditor eggyboi422 asked:
"Kids born to teen moms, how different is your life compared to other kids?"
A Couple of Teenagers
"I’m an early 2000s baby, and my mom really liked emo music when I was little, so I considered myself 'emo' at age six."
"I remember sitting in the backseat of my mom’s 4Runner and listening to Mindless Self Indulgence, MCR, Blink-182, American Football, Fall Out Boy, Taking Back Sunday, and all the late 90s-early 2000s emo music"
" I got to watch a lot of 90s cartoons along with 2000s stuff because it was what my mom watched, and we always had fun sitting on the couch watching TV."
"I had a really good childhood, my and my mom were always friends, she is a great mom, and I always look up to her for being a bada** young single mom who raised me alone."
- StarrAtlasAI
Experience Gifts
"My mom was 16 and my dad 19 when they had me. They took me to a lot of concerts and music festivals growing up."
"Starting around age nine, their go-to birthday present for me was concerts. The first couple of years it was stuff they liked. After I started developing my own tween/teen tastes, they'd give me three tickets so I could take a friend and my uncle as a chaperone."
- jinantonyx
Bonding at the Club
"I worked with a mother and daughter who were only 16ish years apart. They used to go clubbing together. I always thought that was kinda nice."
"And the daughter’s name was Stacy, so we always used to sing ‘Stacy's mom has got it going on.’ They were still enough of a daughter/mother relationship for that to wind Stacy up!"
- TannedCroissant
Money Troubles
"My mom and I are really close. She had me at 14."
"Growing up, I noticed a lot of my friends didn't get along with their moms. I always thought she was really relatable. We go eat, go shopping, get coffee, gossip, and just hang out."
"She worked a lot, sometimes multiple jobs at once, so I felt like I did fewer extracurriculars than my friends. But I was pretty happy growing up."
"She is always concerned with money. I'm starting to notice that she's not very good at saving money or planning retirement and whatnot."
"I once asked a family friend, 'Now that us kids are grown, how are my parents still living paycheck to paycheck?'"
"She explained that, in her opinion, my mom basically skipped learning how to take care of herself as an adult. Instead of learning how to effectively adult, she focused on taking care of her kids."
"I will forever be grateful for my mom and the hard work and sacrifices she endured to raise me and my siblings."
- i_prefer_naps
One-Sided Love
"Mom was 15 when she had me. Honestly, my life sucked. She used to say that she could have given me up for adoption and then decided not to because she realized that I would love her unconditionally, no matter what."
"Our relationship progressed pretty negatively because of that mindset of hers. Every negative thing I did was against what she thought motherhood would be like. I was something she could pick up and put down and leave behind at her leisure."
"There were a number of times she’d drop me off at a family member’s house and disappear. Once, I came home from kindergarten and no one was there (dad was in prison). The next morning, my uncle showed up. He had heard my mom left and had a gut feeling he needed to go to my house."
"There was no food and the heat had been turned off by the utility company. I don’t remember much about that time other than the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and the demolition man movie."
"She had pretty bad trauma and never processed it properly, so when she got angry due to a trauma reminder, she got really angry."
"When she was good, boy, she was golden. She could be the most fun person you could ask for, but she wasn’t a mother. She never held and comforted, but she expected hugs and comfort. She was a kid and thought with a kid brain. When we had some spare change, she’d walk me to the ice cream place and she’d buy herself an ice cream and we’d go back home."
"As I got older, our already weird relationship became weirder. She told me she didn’t want people to know she was my mom and I could introduce her as my sister. She would tell people that she had three children (my siblings) and not claim me because people would do the math. She wanted to be friends with my friends. She wanted to hang around when they were there."
"What I know about having a teenage mom is this: I loved her with the kind of fanatical worship that messed me up for a long time. She could be funny and cruel at the same time. When she gave you attention, your world would be brighter, but when she was mad at you, the world would be dark."
"She never grew out of her teenage mindset, and I had to come to grips with that."
"I can’t say that every teenage mom is like mine, but mine was rough."
- loxley3993
Irresponsible Roommate
"My parents got married when they found out my mom was pregnant at 16 (she had me her senior year at 17), and both still managed to work their way through college with me in tow."
"It was honestly pretty annoying. They liked to party a lot with their friends, which got annoying quickly having a bunch of 30-somethings getting drunk and listening to loud music when I had to be up early."
"My mom enjoyed the attention of being mistaken for my sister, but it felt gross because she was the 'hot mom' to all my guy friends growing up and I never heard the end of it."
"My dad wasn’t really interested in doing 'dad' things until they had my sister in their mid-twenties."
"I found out a year ago thanks to 23andMe that my dad’s not my biological father. Apparently, my mom slept around a lot in high school. I found my bio dad, which uncovered a huge conspiracy of lies and bats**t insanity that honestly deserves its own post. Teenagers are f**king stupid."
- writingaboutrain
Poor Care
My partner and I (gay couple) raised his niece's son from age six months to 18 years."
"She was so immature when she had him at 16. She decided to feed him less so he would not use up so many diapers. Bad move."
"He calls us Dad and Poppa, and he calls his mom Kathy. He is now 26. We love him dearly."
- carlodealo
World Lessons
"I was born to a teen mom and a single one at that. I definitely had a lot more freedom and less supervision as a child since both of her parents (my grandparents obviously) passed away soon after I was born, so there weren't many options for babysitters."
"Since she worked two jobs I would often be on my own after school until about 8 o'clock or 9 o'clock at night, sometimes later."
"She definitely struggled to hold down jobs due to not having an education and the overall grind would eventually get to her. At one point she was walking 11 miles a day to and from work because we didn't have a vehicle. Eventually, we lost our home and we remained in and out of shelters until I was about 12."
"I learned ALOT about the world in those days. At the time I hated it and was jealous of other kids having normal lives. Now that I'm older, I wouldn't trade it for the world. It gave me every bit of motivation I have, it gave me better social skills (gotta learn to make friends quickly when you move frequently), and most importantly it taught me to be humble and never view less fortunate people as beneath me."
"She was diagnosed with cancer when I was 13 and died when I was 15 which sucks because in my opinion, I grew up to be a good person and a good father. I would love to have her around to see it."
- KushKapn1991
Fewer Opportunities
"I’ve noticed that I didn’t have the same opportunities as other kids because being a teen mom can lead you down a road of struggle and poverty if you don’t have help from family."
"I’ve always wanted to play sports, but she could never afford the equipment needed at school to be a part of it. Mentally, I had to mature faster at a young age because she was still a kid herself. It’s unnerving to think teachers would tell me I seemed older than my age at ten years old."
- Ainika
The Free Teen
"My mother resented me and the freedom I had as a teen and young adult. I got to do and experience so many things she didn't get to, by choice."
"On her side, I come from a long line of teen moms, but I didn't make that mistake. I was 27 when my daughter was born. And my daughter is almost 22 with no kids yet, so the cycle is broken on our branch at least."
- lisasimpsonfan
Priorities
"My mom thought I spent too much of my late teens and early twenties at home with my boyfriend (now husband over ten years later) instead of going out drinking and clubbing every weekend like young people are 'supposed' to do."
- bryonia_alba
Guilt Trip
"When I started to look at colleges, my mom would snidely say, 'I would have gone to college if I didn't have you.'"
"It f**ked me up pretty badly. I lost all excitement to graduate and move into the next phase of my life."
- booboocanoeshoe
Standing in the Way
"I'm the first in my family to go to college, and I’m finishing my Ph.D. One time while visiting home, my mom went off on me that I think I’m better than everyone there and act uppity."
"It’s really stuck with me, and I’m not entirely comfortable at home or in academia where I feel like a complete outsider."
- quenual
Personal Growth
"Parents still trying to grow up and learn life lessons ten years later because they never really had the chance to while raising you, it’s kinda cool though because then If you’re aware enough, you also pick up on it."
"This happened with my dad too. He was in his twenties for me and my first brother and wasn't ready, but then my youngest brother came 14 years later and I always felt like my dad 'made up' for how he was with us by having a fantastic relationship with the youngest. I don't resent him for it, I get it."
- Leela_bring_fire
Breaking the Cycle
"My fiancé is a child born of a teen mom and she herself was a teen mom. She told me stories of her mom being abusive and tormenting her. A true narcissist."
"She, in turn, parents with tough love, but there’s no tormenting, just keeping a high level of accountability on her daughter. She doesn’t want her to go through what she went through raising a kid as a teen and wants the best for her daughter without resentment."
"My fiancé’s daughter is almost 18 and in college and not wanting kids ANY time soon. Fiancé also went from nothing to nurse graduating summa cum laude, shattering the 'teen mom' stigma people have on teen moms."
- jchetra83
While there are many ideas and stereotypes for what it means for a young woman to become a teen mom, it's clear from the subReddit that these experiences are much more mixed. Some are as negative as society might expect, but others are genuinely worthy of being praised.
People Explain Which Teen Movies Made Them Think 'The Older I Get, The More I Agree With The Adult'
There's a fairly common formula in movies geared toward a teenage audience.
A group of teenagers face one central conflict, to varying degrees of importance and severity, but manage to solve it in a surprisingly short manner of time.
The heroes of these films are usually a hodgepodge of traditional high school archetypes (star athlete, math nerd, girl whose beauty is disguised by a pair of glasses), all of whom the intended audience can completely relate to and root for.
And then we have the adult characters, who are often buffoonish stereotypes, or the outright villain, whose sole mission is to ensure the protagonist will not achieve their ultimate goal.
As teenagers, we often find ourselves ready to boo these grown-ups from the minute they appear on the screen.
But when we revisit these movies as adults, we find ourselves noticing that their behavior isn't quite as bad as we remembered.
Or, more shockingly, we actually find ourselves rooting for them!
"What teen movie is the epitome of 'the older I get, the more I agree with the adult?'"
The Teacher Was Right All Along...
"Rewatching 'Scrubs', I realize I’m no longer a JD., I’ve become a Cox."- RenegadeRinker
They Were Just Being Protective!
"I watched 'Sixteen Candles' recently and I now do not approve of Samantha going anywhere near Jake Ryan."-goblininstigator
All It Takes Is A Little Perspective
"Sadly, 'The Wonder Years'."
"I always couldn’t believe the dad was real, with his pissed off attitude from work."
"Now I understand."- hashn
The Wonder Years Thumbs Down GIFGiphyNothing Wrong With A Little Precision And Order!
"The movie 'Juno'."
"Jennifer Garner's character is at first portrayed as a 'square', then you realize she's a mature adult and her husband is a man-baby."- DaveFarted
Add It Up, The Wedding Cost Nearly $150,00!
"Not a teen movie, but 'Father of the Bride'."
"Watching it as a kid, Steve Martin seemed like an old grump."
"Rewatching it as an adult, holy sh*t he is the only sane person in that movie."- DrOctopusMD
It Was Literally His Job To Protect Them!
"'The Lion King'."
"Oh I thought Zazu was just an old fun-killer."
"What do you mean, Simba can't be king?"
"Why would you prevent the kids from going where they want?"
"As an adult and father, I'm 100% Team Zazu."- Oneiric86
the lion king GIF by DisneyGiphySeriously, Would Your Dad Have Been So Cool About It?...
"'American Pie'."
"As a new father, I hope to be like Jim’s dad when my little one is a teenager."
"Caring, loving and a complete embarrassment to them."- BanjoPhatterson
It's A Parent's Job To Worry.
"The mom in 'Ice Princess'."
"So you have a daughter who has a talent for and seems to like physics and has a shot of getting into Harvard."
"This girl throws it away for ice skating where she has only been competing for less than a year, where if she gets injured she's done and when she reaches 30 she's pretty much done."
"There is no way she is at an olympic level at that point she would need years of training! "
"Hell yes I would advise against it to!"- testmonkey254
Always Be Respectful Of Your Roommate!
"Goob, 'Meet the Robinsons'."- beepboop232
Meet The Robinsons Google GIFGiphyPeople Are Complicated
"Dr Doofenschmirtz."
"He’s just trying to do something right and being a good dad."- LukeLJS123
Dancing
"In Dirty Dancing, Jerry Orbach just wanted a family summer vacation and instead learned entirely too much about his daughters’ sex lives." - User Deleted
Menace
"Mr. Wilson in Dennis the Menace. Seriously, f**k that little miscreant and his parents that turn a blind eye to his shenanigans." -HotTub_MKE
Wimpy
"Haven't watched the movies, but I assume that the movies are similar enough, Diary of a wimpy kid, bro, your mom just wants to stop being a housewife and have a job and you complain that she isn't in the house anymore to be your personal slave, when you get from school you don't even greet her, you just give her your back pack, you little sh*t, do one thing in your life, did you ever thank her for anything Gregory?" - Torture-Dancer
Wonka
"Gene Wilder in original Charlie and the Chocolate factory “stop, don’t... come back” - isaacmorton
Good Will
"Good Will Hunting."
"A great film to watch as a smug, witty underachiever, however genuinely smart & funny you might be (at least according to your friends)."
"But go back to it 15 or 20 years later, perhaps after losing your wife to cancer, and you'll freak out at this scene."
"Source: No idea how smart or funny I really used to be, but I was definitely smug. I married the person I'd been with since we were both 16. She died at 33." - cdeverett
Rugrats
"Rugrats. The parents were so young and just doing their best. I like it was a group of neighbors that were best friends too. I get really stressed out on their behalf now. Especially the one where didi just wants to make it home before her banana tree she bought died in the car but no one could get their sh*t together." - cunexttuesday12
Daria
"Way late to the party; but I’m gonna say “Daria”."
"I used to be a disaffected teen too. All my problems were SO HUGE! And Daria’s parents just DIDN’T UNDERSTAND!"
"I watch it now, and Jake Morgendorffer is who I identify best with. He’s supposed to seem silly and crazy and out of touch, but now I just see a guy who worries so much about providing for his family, dealing with insecurity about his masculinity, and trying to relate to his daughters any way he can in spite of being completely baffled by them, because his hypermasculine upbringing left him ill-equipped to relate to girls."
"Poor Jake. He just wants to be a better dad than his dad. And in spite of his goofiness, I think he does an okay job." - corran450
As teens we're inclined to revolt from our parents and teachers, or even be revolted by them.
But the older we get, the more we understand that nine times out of ten, they were just looking out for us.
Just as we realize that Mr. Hall of Clueless was being pretty generous giving a C to a student who didn't seem to know how to pronounce "Haitian"...
High school... how the trauma follows everyone.
Who has a perfect high school experience?
I wish I could do it all again.
I would've listened more.
Redditor Resplendenced wanted to talk about the good ole days, and how we could've utilized them more.
"What is your biggest high school regret?"
I don't hate high school. But I don't love it. Long story.
Who Cares?
Eddie Murphy Whatever GIF by Coming to AmericaGiphy"Giving a crap what those people thought of me."
UltimateAnswer42
"This is why I was never interested in traveling back to go to a high school reunion. So pointless."
Ennion
Stand Tall
"Not being more confident. My inner voice talked me out of a lot of things that would have made my teenage years more rewarding and productive."
Pokestralian
"This times 1000. Shoot your shot, and act like nothing happened when it fails. Confidence is 100% people pretending to know what the hell they are doing regardless of whether they actually know or not. Nothing that happened in high school is going to matter when you are 40. Just keep that in mind."
jonweezy
Let's Chat
"Should’ve talked to more people."
souljaluv
"You kind of go through assuming other people don’t want to talk to you. Little do you know they think the same thing. I wish I was just nicer and more open to everyone."
Sackyhack
"Do you think the majority of the people genuinely wanted to talk to others? And if so, do you also think this still applies years after high school, or does it dwindle? Just wondering cause in my adult years it's hard finding friends."
ItsNotJust2DimnsionL
The Temps
"Not understanding that it was just temporary; the toxic behaviour of other students, the bullying, the fake friends and stresses imagined. In the end, it was four years of my life and I let it impact me more than I ever should have."
Flicksterea
"I came to say this!!! I’m a teacher and I tell my students all the time that this is temporary. They have to do 4 years then they’re free to do whatever makes them happy. They can go out in the world and get a job, go to college, trade school, etc."
"But there will always be a**holes who try to get you down no matter where you go, so you need to start practicing at a young age how much you allow them to effect you. I went to school with the same people K-12 in my small town and I still talk to 1. I left and didn’t look back, so I tell my kids they can do the same. Even when I visit my parents I don’t go out and see any of those people."
ShePax1017
WERK
Snap Werk GIF by Jackée HarryGiphy"Not realizing what a hottie I was. My self esteem was awful back then."
Iwantedtorunwild
We're all hot in high school. We just don't know it.
Not Bad
The Rock Omg GIF by NBCGiphy"Not finishing school and dropping out. Although, I had no direction or any parental care at the time and was depressed. I did get my GED and i’m in my final year of getting a bachelors in computer science. Not bad for a high school drop out."
kenzo-tx
Toxic
"Falling in with an unhealthy friend group. They were controlling and possessive, and I ended up isolating myself from other, possibly healthier, friendships. I was always warned about abusive romantic relationships. I didn't realize friendships could be abusive as well."
BmandaW
Basic Experiences
"Not dating and socializing. I never wanted anything to do with anyone, as much as people tried. I missed out on basic experiences which didn’t bother me back then but now I’m like i wish i did more high school kid things lmao."
possiblyari
"I was coming here to say that I should have completely skipped dating, so nearly the opposite of you. Dating in high school was horrible, emotionally destructive stuff."
triskelizard
Finding More
"I wish I joined the school paper or something like that."
yeahwellokay
"I was the photo editor on my HS paper because I had a nice camera. It was like a key to the school. I could walk the halls and if questioned I was on paper business. I knew everyone and everyone knew me. Took pictures of all the pretty girls and took some to the darkroom to learn to develop so to speak. Cause I bought a fancy camera I had an amazing high school life."
youareallnuts
With Care
grades a very poor effort GIF by 3 Doors DownGiphy"Not caring about college/my grades."
llxx00
"I had the opposite problem, caring too much about my grades leading to massive sleep deprivation."
TheRed_Knight
Oh High School... what a time.
Do you have high school regrets? Let us know in the comments below.
People Divulge How Their 15-Year-Old Self Would React To The Life They're Living Now
As teenagers, we have all sorts of ideas of what our life will be like when we grow up.
Living in our dream home, with our dream spouse and working at our dream job, essentially without a fear or care in the world.
Needless to say, life doesn't always turn out the way we expect it to.
Leading us to wonder, how would our teenage selves react to the lives we currently lead?
Redditor Jay-ay was eager to know the answer to this question, leading them to ask:
"What would your 15 year old self think about the life you are living now?"
Just Relieved I'm Still Alive!
"I'd be shocked that I was even alive."- Totallycasual
Surprised By My Profession
"'You hated school every single day of your life so far....why the hell did you become a teacher?'"
"'Wait, you've been in college for how long?!'"- Low_Lengthiness_6620
Not The Bank Account You Expected...
"'What happened to becoming rich plan?'"- SuvenPan
Womp-Womp...
"Disappointment and shame."
"So much wasted potential."- Rangestalker
"What a sad bastard."- EF_A_P
Sad Episode 15 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphyOld Habits Die Hard
“;You’re still collecting Pokémon cards?'"
"'Prove it'.”
"And I’d take back a card from childhood and a modern card to show him."
"Knowing me, I’d def believe it after that."- DiggingUpTheCorpses
Glorious Disbelief!
"Show 15-year old me a picture of my wife, and he'd think I was lying."- magnushimself
Noting But Pride
"Surprised that I’m doing everything I thought I never could."- dexZZZ
"'Hey, all things considered, not too bad'."- E_M_E_T
i'll take it tv land GIF by YoungerTVGiphyThere can't be many people who are living the exact life they had planned out for themselves when they were 15.
But whatever your 15-year-old self might think of the life you currently lead, all we can do is live in the moment.
So if you are happy with your current life, whether or not it's what you expected, that's all that matters.
In the US, teenagers technically become adults at 18, an age when they are presumably able to make decisions for themselves and establish independence.
But some teenagers feel they've emotionally and mentally reached maturity before being of legal age, and for some, long after.
Maybe it was a life-changing event or some kind of turning point that make these young adults feel like they are wise beyond their years.
Curious to explore anecdotes relating to coming of age, Redditor brokenbeanie asked:
"When is the first time you remember feeling like an adult?"
These Redditors experienced an epiphany when they realized trips to the grocery store was routine.
Shopping Shuffle
"When I got mad that they rearanged the grocery store."
– Filord99
Self-Sufficient Sustenance
"When I was buying my own groceries and had survived for two weeks on my own. I figured I must be doing it right since I wasn’t feeling hungry or diminished."
– il_cappuccino
Raising A Pet
"It took me a few years. I had a cat for a year and that's when I was like 'holy sh*t I've somehow managed to keep us both alive for an entire year.' That's when I felt like an adult. That was mid to late 20s. I am also a late bloomer."
– PoiLethe
Accomplishments without the supervision of another adult were common indicators for people who felt grown-ish.
Learn As You Go
"My first summer in college, my roommate and I housesat for a couple who were out of town all summer. Paying rent and bills, buying groceries. We were both working, thank God, but we didn’t have a clue what we were doing. Lived on boiled eggs, raisin bran, bologna and cheese sandwiches, and ten cent ramen."
– twcsata
No Approval Necessary
"The first time I didn’t have to ask for permission to go out."
– ag9910
Tasked With Responsibility
"In college, I was with some friends at a party and one of them fell and busted his face so badly, he started bleeding badly. I went looking for someone to do something when I realized I was the only sober one there. Not a fun night or feeling."
– YellowStar012
Epiphany
"I woke up, opened the curtains and looked outside at a beautiful sunny day. I thought to myself 'It's a great day to hang the washing out.'"
"Then I instantly thought ach jeez I'm getting old."
– AesopSkate
Fun With Taxes
"The day I paid my taxes online. I know I overpaid, but getting it out of the way and doing it by myslef felt good. I was an adult now I have full goddam credence to complain about the government."
– triotone
Regarding making purchases, these Redditors realized they could afford luxuries previously not granted to them.
Getting Wheels
"Honestly, the first time I bought a car without mentioning it ahead of time to my parents. I was 27 or 28, married (no kids, though), and it was at that point that I realized 'I didn't really run this past anyone............hmm....' All of the college loans without a cosigner, my careers (firefighter/paramedic and nurse),my marriage, vacations... Etc...All the stuff I did as an adult and it took a $32,000 purchase to really feel like an adult"
– AGACNP
Answer To No One
"I wanted to buy a box of fruit roll-ups. But was feeling weird about it because as a kid we were not allowed to get it. It was too expensive and my parents didn’t want to buy it. At some point, while I was thinking about putting it down, it dawned on me that I was a grown man with my own income. I bought like 20 boxes."
– kup2202
Gummies Gummies
"Constipated? eat sugar free gummies. Need to totally cleanse every single cell in your body? Eat sugar free gummies. Just bored and wanna play chicken with the toilet? Eat sugar free gummies. You and your husband extra bored during the pandemic, so you two want to play who can create the foulest odors possible? Five pound bags of Albanese gummies on Amazon!"
– Illustrious_Tie_4091
Remember your first job? That was a defining moment for these Redditors.
Joining The Daily Grind
"Starting my first full-time 9-5 job."
– galaxymaster1277
No Stress
"Same. It was weird not having to clock in or out and being allowed to leave work to go run an errand etc."
– ThunderySleep
Cool Boss
"I relate to this so hard. I remember when I got my first big boy job I'd pop my head into the bosses office and be like 'cool if I go to lunch?' Or something along those lines and she'd give me a weird look. After like two weeks she let me know that she did not care about lunch breaks, doctors appointments, or even leaving a little early, so long as the work got done. One of my earliest memories of that adulty feeling."
– gamesireallylike
Still Exciting And New
"I just started my first full time job a month ago and I still feel this way. It’s relieving to know it happens to other people. All of my friends work in a different type of industry so I never mentioned it."
– Shariberry
I remember buying my first movie ticket to an R-rated movie was extremely satisfying.
I conveniently forget what movie it was, but it was most likely for a horror film.
Not that the restriction for those under 17 has ever prevented me from sneaking into another theater after having purchased a ticket for a PG-13 film.
Hey, I never claimed to be a model teenager.