"IRL friends of social media “influencers”: what is it like?"
Content Over Friendship
"Awful."
"One of my best friends fell real hard into Instagram, and for a few years it was tolerable and understandable, albeit annoying and strange."
"Everything needed to be documented in specific ways, so lots & lots of photos, even if it took away from the moment."
"But the strange part was how, when she’d share things, the captions always told a slightly different story than what actually happened."
"Like just off enough for me and my other friends to say, huh, that has a weird quality to it."
"Fast forward a couple years, and she gets engaged."
"Boom."
"This was the catalyst for the worst of the influencer mentality to come out. I was in the bridal party, and it was a nightmare."
"No gratitude, just demands."
"Demands for expensive trips and expensive parties and all kinds of things that were above and beyond the means of her closest friends."
"And all the demands were because she had a 'following' and had certain expectations to meet."
"It was really heart wrenching to witness someone belittle their best friend and maid of honor for trying to plan a sweet bridal shower because it wasn’t going to be at an expensive restaurant or art gallery."
"It reached its peak for me when, after the in-state wedding became an expensive destination wedding, there was the demand for an out-of-town bachelorette party a few weeks before."
"I was honest and said I couldn’t afford the bachelorette (mind you, I made about a thousand sacrifices over those months to afford what I could), and was promptly bridezilla’d and told I ruined the whole experience and that I was an awful, fake, inauthentic person."
"It got so bad that the bridal party fractured and disintegrated, she lost two of her best friends (myself and the MOH didn’t even attend the wedding after all her behavior and blow-ups), and we’ve barely spoken since."
"All so she could have an instagrammable wedding that would look good for the few photos she ended up sharing of it."
"And, true to the weird strange re-written reality ways she had, she published a public 'apology' on her blog for her followers and family that completely distorted and rewrote what happened, painted herself as the victim, and got her the sympathy points she was looking for."
"Ppl really lose themselves when they create an artifice for social media."
"I learned a lot from her."- whenthesunrise
Channel 9 Reaction GIF by Married At First SightGiphyLess Than Picture Perfect
"I dated one."
"Not super popular but followers in the 100k range last time we spoke."
"I remember a lot of getting ignored and only receiving nice gifts/acts of kindness when they could post about it."
"Asking me to go to nice places (they didn't drive) only to leave me on a bench somewhere while they took pictures."
"Huge strain on the relationship, especially when they started to get bigger and there was more demand for content."- 42charlemagne
No Chance For Promotion? Not Interested...
"She hasn’t come to anything I’ve invited her to in 5 years because she only goes to events that 'further her business'.”
"Regularly says things like, 'we’re all using each other for something'.”
"Sometimes she texts me the same exact thing word for word over a couple of days, and it’s obvious she just copy/pastes the same thing and sends it to all of us and then forgets who she has sent it to."
"She still reaches out to me multiple times a year and claims I’m one of her best friends, but it sure doesn’t feel like it."
"I’ve told her as much, but she just says 'this is my life now, my business comes first and if you can’t accept that, then I guess you’re not a real friend'.”- Cirrus-Ramparts
It's All A Facade
"Pretty mundane, honestly."
"My friend is conventionally attractive, and if you look at her social media, you'd think she were a supermodel millionaire who goes on tons of trips."
"She's actually chronically unemployed, and has an income of less than 10k/yr."
"Her boyfriend makes about $60k/yr which is enough to afford them a very nice 3 1/2 bedroom apartment, and she has tons of props she uses to make each room look different from day to day so it seems like she's always in a new, exotic place."
"They take two trips a year to fun, tropical places, in which she takes many photos, and posts them as different places throughout the year."
"She's a very kind, considerate, sparkling personality, but whenever we hang out, I tend to be a shoulder to cry on as she laments about her lack of success in life."
"It's quite sad, honestly."
"But with her creativity and personality, I think she'll achieve her dreams eventually."- LemonFly4012
katy perry selfie GIF by Vulture.comGiphyNot What We Signed Up For...
"It's annoying AF."
"One of my buddies is constantly filming everything we do and posting it."
"It's to the point where people walk up to me on the street and ask me about him because they've seen me in his posts."
"I have no idea who they are."
"It dominates everything he does, and has severely impacted his personal relationships."
"He can't keep a GF and it's clearly related to this obsession of his."
"He does occasionally get some cool stuff out of it though."
"After pretty much kicking him out of my life because I do not want to be continually posted online, we've come to the understanding that when he's about to take a pic or video, he hands me the phone so i'm not in the shot."
"Works OK for me."- S_204
But What Will People Think?
"Friends with a high-profile athlete who is pretty popular on insta."
"He is always on the phone."
"Never lives in the moment."
"If we are doing anything fun?"
"Well, it basically didn't happen unless the world knows about it."
"Its just annoying."
"I cant imagine living for the approval or satisfaction of others."- Neither-Act1355
abbi jacobson instagram GIF by Broad CityGiphyWhat Exaclty Is "Influencer Status?"
"I post travel photos and have about two hundred followers."
"200, not 2000 or higher."
"My friend somehow thought that was influencer status and decided to copy me - except she quit her job so she could travel more and 'grow her own brand'."
"In 2020."
"She lost her apartment, her car, and still hasn't found a job, but calls herself a professional influencer all the same."- oikorapunk
Just.Plain.Sad.
"I know a wannabe influencer."
"She will reply to her own posts from her husband's account praising herself."
"Then she will reply to those posts as herself thanking him, it's hilarious, like inception for Facebook."- Sydneyfigtree
Followers Over Friends
"To be honest it’s really sh*t."
"I feel like I’ve been completely forgotten about and like I don’t matter anymore."
"I think that’s just some weird misguided jealousy but it still hurts because I miss talking to my friend."- EmeraldSunrise4000
Take Two...
"Sad."
"In the beginning they started because they got offers from brands because they were so popular on Instagram and it was a lot of fun for them."
"Now they don’t ever post pictures or videos without a filter."
"Rarely ever like a picture on the first try and don’t you dare post any pictures of them without getting their approval for it."
"Imagine trying to get a group picture with all of your friends for your birthday but having you take almost one hundred shots to get one that your influencer friend is happy with."
"Also in the beginning I would like and comment on all of their posts but now that’s not enough."
"They expect me message it others, share it on my stories and my page (something about new rhythms and likes not being important anymore)."
"I hate posting stuff to my page but I do it any way to be supportive."
"It is so tiring."
"They do get free things sometimes though that they sometimes share with me."
"Not worth it imo."- yonewredditwhodis·
Based on the content they post on their pages, influencers' lives would appear to be one giant party.
Spend a day with an influencer though, and it will soon become crystal clear that it is anything but.
Reddit user Acid_In_My_Eyes asked:
"People who can't sleep, what do you do all night?"
Yeah ... turns out, it's certainly not a space of creation for everyone. Unless the thing you're creating is anxiety.
Over and Over
"Toss and turn. Overthink. Replay conversations on my mind."
- strawberrytohoney
"Yeah man... anxiety takes it toll on sleep. The more stressful the day, the worse the sleep."
- zfgnjzfgnjmzrfgjk
"100%!!!! And how I could have acted differently or what else could’ve happened."
- strawberrytohoney
GiphyIncreasing
"Be increasingly pissed off about not being able to sleep."
- Froggielaflame
"It's the most vicious cycle ever."
"Can't sleep, pissed off that you can't sleep, now it's even harder to get to sleep. Now you are stressing out because it's getting closer to the next day, adds to the fact you cant sleep."
"Been there..."
- Zer0C00L321
Calculations
"Calculate how many hours of sleep I could at least still have if I was able to fall asleep at that moment."
- Adept-Elephant1948
"Same."
"It’s literally the worst because I end up priming myself for a day where I believe I’ll perform suboptimally; thereby ensuring I perform suboptimally."
"It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy."
- Samson8765
"Being tired and having a sh*t day at work because you laid awake all night thinking about how you were going to be tired and have a sh*t day at work is the worst."
- OfficeChairHero
Not No Regrets
" 'Dream’ random scenarios in my head where I either could have done better or changed things, or I’m dreaming of scenarios I want to happen, either because they might or just because I want it in the future"
-Genderneutral_Bird
"So its not 'no regrets' it's 'some regrets?' "
-Acid_In_My_Eyes
"Every single day. They can be as small as ‘I wish I had just given x person x compliment’ to ‘I never should have told x person about x secret’ etc"
-Genderneutral_Bird
Happy Place
"I have found success in just accepting that I cant sleep, OK I GUESS IM NOT GONNA SLEEP RIGHT NOW...and then getting in to a comfy position."
"EYES WIDE OPEN, NOT TRYING to sleep. Just lay there and let my mind wander."
"I build what I call, happy places."
"What kind of life do I WISH I had? What kind of world do I wish this was?"
"I build the whole world, I usually have powers but no one knows."
"I'm rich. I'm single. The world is safe enough to leave your front door unlocked and no one goes in to your house."
"I just build and build and build the most kickass scenarios, and eventually I'll wake up and be like 'OH I FELL ASLEEP!' and after that I usually keep sleeping."
-finalglimmer
GiphyBed Time Stories
"I am really bad at falling asleep. Unless really tired and/or using alcohol."
"Since that's not an everyday solution I listen to an audiobook, in my case the Harry Potter series."
"I know the books so well that my brain, while focusing on the story, grows numb an I fall asleep."
"The audiobook, unless the device is shaken, will turn off after 30 minutes. I mostly fall asleep within the hour now and I have something fun to listen to."
"Haven't tried it using a story I don't know, but that will probably keep me awake."
-Mr_Zoelmond
"I do this with Forensic Files."
"It’s crazy, but I’ve seen all 20 thousand of them and the familiarity and voice puts me in a calm trance."
"It takes what it takes lol"
-Leading_Funny5802
Crash When You Crash
"Read, browse reddit, music, get some work done, daydream/think whatever u wanna call it."
"I don't adhere to a schedule, I just crash when I crash, get up when I get up."
"It's healthy trust me."
-69stuffstuff69
"Do u work or go to school right now?"
-Acid_In_My_Eyes
"School, and online. All it complicates is the occasional obligation. May not align for everyone, but it's what works for me and if it works for you it could be all cool."
-69stuffstuff69
Relish The Rare
"Turn off blue light on all devices an hour before sleep."
"Use a white noise app or something similar so your mind blocks out and focuses on only 1 sound."
"Reading or listening to podcasts."
"Turn a lot."
"Most importantly for me is to get comfortable and relish in that rare comfort."
"The times I'm not worried about my lack of sleep, the better sleep I get. I normally remember that being comfy and switched off from the world (even if it doesn't work) is much more preferable to being uncomfy, looking at a screen and working for 7 hours straight."
"If nothing else, Masturbate."
-VirgilVanDoink
Transporting Myself
"I’m going through chemo treatments right now and on Tuesday nights through Thursday, into Friday, I can’t sleep."
"I will get up, go to the living room, pour a cup of coffee and read."
"I’ve finished a few books since January and I’m running out. I’m taking in the peace and quiet and transporting myself to a different world for a few hours."
"Then, I’ll take a nap for a bit. Rinse and repeat every other week."
-PickleSmack
GiphyTurning Japanese
"I remember a few weeks back, I was quite nervous about my girlfriend's wellbeing as she was super stressed about things."
"That made me super stressed about things to the point I couldn't sleep."
"I ended up trying to assemble basic sentences in Japanese for a few hours to take my mind off things."
-BagOfToenails
That Scrubbing Sound
"I really don’t know if this will help anyone, but I watch reconstruction videos of old vintage items and welding of items."
"Such as cleaning a old and broken PS1 and forging weapons from video games, hearing the sounds and the scrubbing at a low sound does help me sleep"
-Character-Ostrich-54
There you go, fellow insomniacs.
Now you've got a project list for the next time sleep decides it's not your friend.
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