Redditor AndyBales wanted to hear the small town tales that left everybody shook, so they asked:
"Redditors who grew up in small towns, what was 'the incident?'"
My towns are dull. But I have a feeling dull is good.
Scraped
Yard Work Dog GIFGiphy"It was hushed up, but the former sheriff of my hometown stole people's lawnmowers and sold them for scrap for close to a decade. Weird place."
Power_Wiz_IV
In the Woods
"A light shining into the sky a couple times from out in the woods. Police went out to check it, found a man no one knew in a cabin no one knew of, LOADED with guns and ammunition. When asked why he had so many, what he was doing shining a light into the sky."
"He was sending a beacon to the aliens because they told him to shine a light to guide them, when he had things ready for them…. Yeah."
IDontEvenCareBear
BAAAHHHHH!!!!
"'The incident' involved sheep..."
"A flock of sheep kept on the town green migrated through a broken fence into the adjacent cemetery. The sheep became known as the 'Lamb-scapers' because they did a better job of manicuring the cemetery grounds than the maintenance person."
Back2Bach
The Scandal
"Guy in my high school knocked up the daughter of the local fitness center owner. The owner offered him a car to leave his daughter alone and not be a part of the baby’s life. He accepted the offer and took the car. Once she gave birth, they ran away together in the car."
"The fitness center owner found them, torched the car, and threatened to kill the guy. They fought and the baby daddy won. This apparently garnered some respect from both men and now everyone seems like a happy family."
LessGoooo
The Stash
pulp fiction art GIF by hoppipGiphy"A wealthy couple were brutally murdered in their home by an adult daughter and her boyfriend. It was rumored they had a ton of money stashed in the house."
bemest
Money is always the root of evil.
Down the street...
Will Smith Smh GIF by The Academy AwardsGiphy"A guy robbed the bank then ran to his home to hide… that was down the street. Took the cops an embarrassingly long time to get him."
Wenissucker
Bianca Piper...
"Small town in Missouri. Bianca Piper, it was 2005, supposedly she went for a walk after a fight with her mom and was never seen again. I was a junior in high school and skipped school that day. My friends and I freaked when we saw cop cars and helicopters out EVERYWHERE. Thought they were looking for us. Everyone here has always said her mother had something to do with it."
thallemeyer
The Giggler
"The 40something drunk man who broke into the high school dressed as batman to prank scare the high school classes by staring in the windows then running away giggling uncontrollably to appear somewhere else on campus and scare a different class. There was an hour and a half long lockdown and he ended up found and arrested."
quietcopse
At the Bottom
"A little girl had a seizure (or hit her head. Nobody knows for sure) in the YMCA swimming pool, went unconscious, and drowned during a youth swim team practice. My sister and her friends were also on the team. They saw her at the bottom of the pool and thought she was just messing around. Lifeguards and instructors weren’t even paying attention."
broshley
WTH?!
Okaay What GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"Some cheerleaders pooped on a pizza at cheer camp and blamed the rival high school's cheerleaders. George Bush (president at the time) even spoke about it."
Alicesblackrabbit
Lord, the scandals of a small town.
Redditor Lost-Warning-2588 wanted to hear about everyone's craziest school stories.
So they asked:
"What’s the worst scandal to happen at your school?"
My school was pretty tame. At least in the public news.
I have no idea what was behind closed doors.
Throwdown...
Slap Empire GIF by FOX Nederland & BelgiëGiphy"Girl A decided to fight girl B in class. Girl A ripped girl B’s real hair out, broke her nose, and crippled her. Girl B was sent to the emergency room. Girl A was suspended for 2 weeks. They were both in 7th grade."
Apollo_xo3
After Graduation
"The math teacher left his wife of 18 years for one of the graduating seniors."
blunt_dissect
"Had a history teacher do the same thing. Left his wife for a student he had in freshman and sophomore year and they married the year after she graduated."
2faKilledmymain
"Happened with an English teacher in my school. He didn't leave school until a couple years after she graduated, but he left his wife and kids for her, and she dropped out of an Ivy League school for him."
ianisms10
Prevention
"One year in exams days they were trying to add a new method to prevent cheating where a man from the administration comes to every class before every exam and collects students phones while sticking a sticker with a number on each phone and giving the same sticker to the student."
"So he can get his phone after school without anyone taking someone else's phone that looks alike or something. This was working at first and a bit 'preventing cheating' until one day some guy sneaked into our high school and came as the man who collects the phones while he wasn't, he stole the whole high school phones and went. lol."
Crazy
"A student that was in the grade above me (I was a senior, he had graduated) killed his girlfriend and buried her by the train tracks right behind the school. Yeah it was crazy. He seemed like a cool guy I guess, I’d run into him at a few parties and had a couple classes with him. The girl went to school in a neighboring town so I didn’t know her."
macadamianacademy
Hold Me
Best Friends Love GIF by TV LandGiphy"My middle school banned hugging and hand holding during course changes because it blocked the hall. In protest all the Eighth Graders stood up and hugged each other during their lunch period. A bunch of students got detention. Made the cover of the Charlotte Observer."
bcarol99
Hugs make the world better. Hug it out.
Good Lord
Keith Morrison Wow GIF by Dateline NBCGiphy"The caretaker killed two local girls and hid them in the school, he tried using the clay kiln to burn them. He later dumped them a few miles away."
jofive
The Super
"We had a computer teacher/football assistant coach who was just blasted all day, had so many DUIs he had to get rides to work, but was the cousin of the Superintendent so he kept his job. Let’s just say that when he crashed a student’s car in the parking lot because he convinced them to let him borrow it that that was the beginning of the end of it."
"It was a small town. The scandal is that the Super tried to cover it up by trying to convince the kid to take the heat for it. To no one’s surprise, the kid was not convinced. They let him stay on as Super for another two years."
TheMCM80
Crazy, man...
"A kid in my senior year short story class (who sat directly behind me) was charged with the stabbing, beheading and burning of one of his friends/drug dealer."
"I remember the day like it was yesterday, sitting in my short story class when my teacher came in, in tears because she just heard the news."
"Students didn't find out about it until later. I actually have a friend who testified in his trial because he purchased the murdering materials at the hardware store she worked at."
"Crazy, man."
Supersmaaashley
Targets
"One weekend a couple of kids from the hockey team had a sleep over."
"One of the older boys from high school targeted them. He tied them up, slit their throats and set the house on fire."
"One of the boys survived and is an incredible person. He’s the chief of a fire department and has done motivational speaking."
"The murderer is now out on full parole."
Ed_Dantes35
BOOM!
New Girl Facepalm GIF by HULUGiphy"Kid made a chlorine bomb and threw it in the trash can at lunch. Lockdown, bomb squad, every single kid and faculty member out on the field in 95° weather for 2+ hours until parents could show up to pick up their kids."
Specifilly
Socks
"Kid in my class sent an email to the White House, threatening to kill Socks, the Clinton's cat. Secret Service showed up a few days later after they tracked down the computer."
Goombaw·
Swim Class
"First week of high school. PE class, the first section was swim. wasn’t my class, but the class after. This kid was playing a game with his friends in the water—who could hold their breath the longest. He was going up for air and hit head on the pointy part of the gutter, and never made it to the surface. Friends didn’t notice, teacher didn’t notice. Eventually, football players coming back to the locker rooms noticed. He ended up dying. Teacher was fired although I wouldn’t fully blame him as he was attending and teaching kids who didn’t know how to swim or weren’t strong swimmers. One adult for over 60 kids?? That’s the school's fault."
millennial_dad
Pardon Our French (Teacher)
"History teacher disappeared in the night with the French teacher's wife."
-0---------------0
Oral Tradition
"My high school Guidance counselor screwed a science teacher's wife and everyone knew about it. They got a divorce. Both teachers still work at the same school to this day, and students will never ever let it go. The story has been handed down from year to year."
tiyeyo
Kids are crazy. I'm glad I chose to only have pets.
Redditor AbsoluteHavoc wanted to heard all of the family drama that we've heard unleashed.
So they asked:
"What family secret was finally spilled in your family?"
Years Later
Family GIFGiphy"Found out my grandma had a baby as a teenager and was forced to give him up for adoption by my great grandparents. 40 years later he found us."
dont-take-my-soup
"Same thing happened to my mom. I'm 33 now, older half-brother is roughly 35. I hold hope that I'll meet him one day."
YagamiIsGodonImgur
Nod & Agree
"That my parents 'had' to get married. They always told us they got married in 1961, but it was 1962, 3 months before my sister was born."
"What's amusing is that my father was an accountant who was insanely fast with math. Whenever he was asked how many years they'd been married, he'd be off by one. My mother would correct him through clenched teeth and then my father would nod and agree."
dramboxf
23 and me surprise...
"My great grandmother wasn’t actually Mexican but rather was adopted by a Mexican family from a Chinese family who was being kicked out of Mexico when railroad construction was over. She always had more typically Asian features but only spoke Spanish and it was never really questioned. 23 and me is a hell of a thing."
bustyodust
ALL OUT!
"When my paternal grandfather died the federal govt reached out to do a state funeral. He'd been career army and a colonel, so we didn't question it. Then the funeral came and they went ALL OUT! Huge procession, people showing up who are really big names, like heads of dept's, senators, retired senators, people from the CIA and State Dept, it was nuts and we were all super confused."
"Turns out he was a key dude in the OSI during WWII and when the OSI splintered into the CIA and Secret Service, he went the Secret Service route. He wasn't on White House detail, but instead worked in a covert office that dealt with counterfeiting and currency."
"He went blind when I was a toddler and retired from 'the Army.' For whatever reason, he told no one about all his covert work with the OSI and Secret Service and the only person who knew (my grandmother) was sworn to secrecy and never told anyone. My father grew up thinking he was just a colonel working on base."
"Only after his death were we given all sorts of cool s**t like publications by him, lectures given by him, and all kinds of things from various things he did and was known for. All I knew him as was a blind old man who was perpetually smoking, drinking and being a crotchety b**tard. Turns out he was a bad motherf**ker and all but none of us knew."
haroldtitus425
True Crime
Consider True Crime GIF by Dateline NBCGiphy"My father's brother killed 4 girls when he was in high school. My father was the one who found out and told the police."
yeshelloitme
Good Lord. What in the world?
The Generation Before
Joe Biden Shock GIF by GIPHY NewsGiphy"My grandparents are first cousin’s... an uncle on the same side of the family is in prison for the assassination of a presidential candidate (family still says he was framed and is innocent)."
Cervesaz
The Push
"This is kind of messed up, but my parents told me my mom had a bad back because i pushed on her spine during birth. this was what I thought all my childhood. I think I was in my teens when my older brother told me my dad pushed my mom during an argument and she fell and had to have surgery. I thought I ruined my mom's back my entire childhood and those SOBs let me believe it "
thtssotrue
#7
"My mother is kid #7 of 10. My aunt (kid #4) who was born in 1945 did her DNA and found out that she has a different father from everyone else. She was devastated. There was always rumor that there was an affair but nobody talked about it. She has so many questions but nobody's alive to answer her."
I_see_farts
Thanks Mom...
"When I was 5 years old (1988), Santa Clause left a Nintendo on our front porch. It was wrapped in newspaper, and my parents had no idea who gifted it to us. My dad, particularly, tried to figure it out. He was always suspicious that it had been a family friend. It was by far the best gift of the year, and we played it all the time throughout our childhood."
"My dad died in 2004."
"Last Christmas, my mom explained that she was the one who had bought it and surreptitiously placed it on the porch. My dad really liked to be in control of things and had forbidden the purchase. She knew better. She didn't tell a soul for 30 years."
"Thanks Mom..."
Madame_F
In the Swamp...
Okaay What GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"I only just recently heard about this, but my grandmother had gotten a little drunk with my dad and brother a month or so ago and started talking about our great uncle Ferber (not sure on the spelling), but from what I heard he apparently killed quite a few people and buried them on some family-owned land in a swamp."
DHA_Matthew
Well if there was ever any reason to change your last name and move.
Do you have anything your itching to get off your chest about your family tree? Let us know in the comments.
Redditor gosty_the_brave24 wanted everyone to spread a little history.
So they asked:
"What's an NSFW facts about a historical figures that we don't learn in school?"
This thread maybe slightly inappropriate for readers under 17. So NC-17
Educational, but inappropriate.
Clothes Off
Shaking Cold Weather GIF by funkGiphy"Victor Hugo wrote in the nude as a form of motivation. He was a horrible procrastinator so he would lock himself in a room and have his clothes taken as encouragement to get his work done (because he was cold). When he was finished, he'd get his clothes back."
retro-petro
How Wonderous
"Wonder Woman was created by a polyamorous man who was (a) a feminist, (b) a kinkster, and (c) living with two bisexual women. Wonder Woman was influenced by at least one of his wives, and started as a very overt, kinky, empowering sex symbol for women, and was nearly cancelled because of how explicitly she was being depicted. It's supposed that her rope of truth was partly inspired by rope play in BDSM."
ray25lee
Zelda Lies
"F. Scott Fitzgerald's wife, Zelda, told him that the way he was built, he would never please a woman. He confessed this to Hemingway in a French bar, and Hemingway told him to meet him in the bathroom where he looked at Fitzgerald's penis and told him he was 'perfectly fine.'"
littleredridinghood6
Ummm...
"Emperor Nero kicked his wife Poppaea to death. He later found a slave boy named Sporus who looked like Poppaea, had him castrated, and kept him as his wife. After the death of Nero, Sporus was taken by Nymphidius Sabina, who treated Sporus as his wife. But Sabina was murdered by his guards when he tried to become Emperor. Sporus was next taken by the Emperor Otho, who had once been married to Poppaea until Nero took her away from him."
"Otho called Sporus Poppaea and took him as his wife. Otho was murdered shortly afterwards. Otho's rival, Vitellius, planned on using Sporus in a reenactment of the Rape of Peroserpina in the Colosseum, but Sporus committed suicide."
FireFlinger
Domino's?
Pizza Pizza Pizza Dancing GIF by Domino’s UK and ROIGiphy"The Boris Yeltsin pizza incident, in which the former Russian leader was found in just his underwear outside the Whitehouse hailing a cab so he could go get pizza... https://www.politico.com/blogs/on-congress/2009/09/yeltsin-drunk-in-his-underwear-hailing-a-cab-021553"
fezwang
I just don't find pizza THAT appealing.
Falling Apart
tales from the darkside 80s GIFGiphy"Herodotus, an ancient Greek Historian once stated that female mummies who passed away in Ancient Egypt were found more decomposed than male mummies. The reason being was that the females were kept at home for longer periods of time before sent for embalming to prevent necrophilia."
Icarithan
It did not work...
"Not quite a historical figure but John Pemberton, the inventor of Coca Cola, did so because he was chronically addicted to morphine and was trying to get off of it. Original ingredients were cocaine (famously), sugar, alcohol, and caffeine. He was trying to supplant his other addiction. It did not work."
Nightjar82
"So another thing about Pemberton that I learned very recently was that he served as a Lieutenant Colonel in the Confederate army during the Civil War. His morphine addiction you were talking about was actually something he developed after being stabbed with a sword during a battle."
TylerD1528
In Public
"John Quincy Adams boasted that outdoor sex was an American invention. Between that, his pet alligator, and a life spent in public service (literally from his teenage years until his death), probably far more interesting than most people who've held high office in the USA."
Bowmore34yr
"Also swam nude in the Potomac, daily, when he was president."
costabius
Build It
"The new UK monarch King Charles III great-great-grandfather Edward VII was so obese that he commissioned a french carpenter to build a chair that would enable him to have sex with one or two people at once. It is called the siege d'amour and was installed at his favourite brothel."
haveasliceofpizza
Oh Mary
frankensteins monster frankenstein GIFGiphy"The author of Frankenstien lost her virginity on her mother's grave."
Unique_Finance_2358
"In the version I saw, her father didn't approve of the relationship, so she told him she was visiting her mother's grave to avoid suspicion and then met her guy there for sexy time."
Agitated_Ad7576
Well that is a whole lot of mess. Goodness.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
