People say age is nothing but a number, or maybe it's a state of mind.
In my case, it's mostly a state of bladder.
In all fairness to my bladder, I'm not even 5 feet tall so it would be weird if I had some enormous elephantine organ.
I've always had to pee a lot ... but now I'm almost 40 and have a few pregnancies under my belt and honestly it's easier for me to just announce when I DON'T have to pee.
It's never. The answer is never.
Don't even ask me.
Yes, I have to pee.
And I'm not the only one.
Reddit user NordicModro asked:
"What is a clear sign of you getting older?"
Before Leaving
"You don't dare leave the house without peeing."
- GrimmRetails
"Especially in the winter."
"One of my biggest fears is getting into a car accident and pissing my pants, laying in the snow in wet pants waiting for the EMTS, ambulance, freezing my ass and Vjay off."
"I HATE being cold, but wet cold is hell."
- gerrywasi
"Oh yeah, and before you sleep, and when we wake up in the middle of the night and then the second time."
- docsav0103
"Whenever I see large sport championship parades or events like NYE in Times Square the first thing I think is: Where do they pee? I also will not go anywhere without knowing beforehand there will be enough facilities LOL."
- Capital_Pea
The Elder Scrolls
"When you are asked your birthday online and you realize how much you have to scroll to get to your birth year."
- ManicPrincessofKink
"It feels like I'm spinning the wheel on The Price is Right."
- Bubbly-Explanation
"The Elder Scrolls"
- NearbyBreakfast
"I had to travel in the early days of covid and my state required an online travel declaration before arrival."
"The web page only let you enter your birthdate through a calendar widget. I had to manually scroll back 598 months."
- needlenozened
"I was setting up my online bank account and they wanted my birthday. To get to it you had to click the calendar back month by month."
"I was born in 1964. That's over 680 clicks to get to my birthdate."
"That system was designed by a blithering idiot. Probably a teenaged blithering idiot."
- PaperPlaythings
Until...
"I saw this somewhere yesterday, you live your 30's just like your 20's until 'the injury' or 'the diagnosis.' "
- -Words-Words-Words-
"This is me."
"No injury, but life-changing (not life-ending) diagnosis -and the following ramifications- at 33 signaled the end of the good times, and forced me to come to terms with my mortality."
"Now my Friday/Saturday nights consist of couch, Cooper’s Hawk (home by 10), or DnD. Youth, and life, is precious ya’ll. Don’t waste it."
- deltavictory
"I feel attacked."
"Ate sh*t on a snowboard last year and dislocated my shoulder to the point it needed surgery. Now I walk like an old man on slippery surfaces for fear that something else is gonna fall apart on me if I go down."
- Puzzled_Reply_4618
"Yup. I strained the hell out of my back when I was 35 and In good shape - sitting on the ground pulling a weed. Could not move on my own. Needed to go to the ER for meds! That was like smacking into a wall"
- JohnExcrement
Sneaking Out
"I used to sneak out of home to go to parties."
"Now I sneak out of parties to go home."
- TheYoungWan
"Your next stage of old is not going to parties in the first place."
- YouveGotItMister
"I hate you and feel attacked by this comment. This is amazing. And hurts."
- Phoenixapartment
"Fact! My husband and I have a code word for when it’s time to go."
- Notjustapornacct
Action Movies
" 'Ooh I like their cabinetry' while watching an exciting action movie."
-SpatulaJamtown
" 'Who is going to pay for all this?' after an explosion"
- AtmospherePerfect532
" 'As if they'd furnish a million dollar penthouse with Ikea furniture. How unrealistic' - Me watching Hawkeye"
- BCS24
"Haha, I've been telling my husband about the cabinetry in the second season of the Punisher for two years now!"
- CallieCatsup
Legitimate Comfort
"You don't feel as compelled to engage as much. For better or for worse I suppose."
"I'm in my early 40's. And at this point I've learned to be ok with people being wrong. Used to feel like some sort of crusade to make sure everyone had the right information. Like many things in life, you always have to ask yourself if the juice is worth the squeeze."
"End of a game of Overwatch, had a bad game? Some random says 'Wow thanks for throwing, you were trash' My response? 'gg' "
"Someone cuts me off? Give them room."
"I just leave people the fuck alone as I want left alone. It's kind of become my life's mission. Fuck all that bs about pushing yourself."
"Seek some goddamn legitimate comfort because life will never stop throwing you bs to maintain that hobby of dealing with challenges. But what life will never offer you without you making it for yourself is comfort."
"And I find comfort in ignoring almost everyone. Most of the time. Not from a lack of compassion. Just don't like the volume that loud you know?"
-
No Longer Static
"The biggest one for me is realizing and recognizing that my parents are getting older."
"For my childhood, they were these static, never changing figures. But now, they're older and I can see that. It's definitely pretty saddening and worrying."
- Kaidsburg100
"I had this realization last year."
"My dad is almost 60. I've always had young parents but the years are finally starting to show and it freaked me out. Like a glass shattered moment. '
'I hate it."
- PirateQueenDani
"Had this realization last week when my dad turned 70, it just made me sad."
- stevio87
Zombies
"After sitting still for a long period of time, standing and walking involves shambling about like a zombie."
"You're fine after a seconds of movement, but initially nothing works right."
"To be honest, it can be solved by more movement in our lives."
"Daily walks, stretching exercises, yoga, that sort of thing. Aerobics would be great, but nothing high impact."
"The older you get, the worse being sedentary is for you; sitting down without moving or stretching for long periods (over a few hours) is fine when you're 20. When you're 40, it means your joints lock up, your muscles fall asleep, and you get cramps."
"If we moved every hour or so (even just standing up and doing a few stretches), it would likely go away."
- Kiyohara
Earlier
"I schedule plans with friends earlier and earlier every passing year."
"There's just something so satisfying about getting dinner and drinks at 6p and being back at home wearing my comfy fit binging the show du jour by 9p."
- cheerioguvna
"Yep. I'm 34 and now limit evening activities as much as possible."
"Just can't be bothered anymore."
"It's wet, cold, dark, you have to drag yourself out when you really don't want to then have the effort of getting home again afterwards."
"Screw that. I'd rather do stuff during the day and just have a quiet evening in to myself."
- _spookyvision_
The Grumpy Neighbor
"You know that movie trope where some kids play baseball or something and break an old guy’s windows?"
"As a kid I thought that guy was a grump. Now I just think about what a pain it would be to have your windows replaced."
"So yeah, that’s my sign I’m getting old."
- KickedInTheDonuts
Welp ... after having read all of this I am now more convinced than ever I'm really, really, old—and maybe I always have been.
Time for a nap.
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People Break Down The Things They're Waiting To Do Until They're Older
Some people love to ascribe time limits to when they can and can't do things.
There are sayings out there such as "LA is for your 30s," or "I could only do that in my 20s," or "I feel like I'm in my 80s," when you are doing something like eating peanuts and watching Designing Women.
The truth is, we can do these things whenever. Though it's fun to ascribe ourself these limitations, they aren't necessarily accurate. but sometimes, people make the choice to leave things for later.
With life both being "no day but today" and an incomprehensible stretch of time among us, it's natural to reserve some things for later.
A Redditor asked:
"What is something you are holding off doing until you are much older?"
Here were some of those answers.
Opiods Or Amphetamines? Choose
"Meth. If I'm like 97 and not cryopreserved or if I get a terminal diagnosis, I'm not going out like a b*tch."-tex_da_PHOX
"I dig the sentiment but I feel like you can definitely choose a better drug than meth for your going away party. Like it just seems rather horrible at 97 years old when your body isn’t even physically up to that anymore".
"Heroin or something like that seems like it’d be more pleasurable at that point."-Addictive_System
Bébés
"Having kids.. I can appreciate both sides. Yes, waiting until that age means you'll be more financially stable, more mature and probably more patient."
"But, having them young means that you can enjoy your middle age more, because you're not parenting littles at the same time. You have more energy to play with them too."
"And when you're retired your kids are already quite settled adults and don't need you financially for extra support as much, so you can afford to do the travelling you've promised yourself since you were younger."
"There's no right time or age to have kids, do it when you want and not a second before!"-Filhopastry79
Cover Them All
"Getting a tattoo to cover my old self harm scars. I'm ashamed and embarrassed by them. I wish I could cover them now."
"But I cannot afford a tattoo, and I'd prefer to wait until my father passes away to avoid dealing with him being snarky. I love him, but he can be judgemental and a little too uptight."-occultatum-nomen
See anything up here that you are also saving for later?
Streaking To The South Pole
"Going to Antarctica to join the 300 club. Why? Because its expensive. Basically you go to the South pole, wait till its 100 below outside and then go to the sauna and crank it up to 200 degrees."
"And then (usually with aid of alcohol) you run out butt naked except for your feet, take a picture by the south pole flag as by the time you get to it, your body will be covered in thick frost that makes you look like the abominable snowman."
"And then run back to the sauna and subjecting your body to a 300 degree temperature difference... hence the 300 Club."-Youpunyhumans
Teaching The Youths
"Become a high school teacher. I want to have an accomplished career before doing this (probably in my 50's when I'll be close to retiring)."
"I'd like to teach mathematics and on the way also be a positive figure in children's lives, give them the kind of care that I wish that I had when I was their age."
"It's something I'm thinking about a lot because my upbringing was extremely rough personally. I was never a driven student, and teachers wrote me off as someone who 'should be a plumber' (also, nothing wrong with being a plumber, but the teacher that told that to my parents was most likely trying to put me down)."
"I am now a professional Economist working towards an MSc. It took me a while to get there (graduated at 26, moving from a 0.8 GPA to 3.4), but it is what it is."
"No one deserves to be shot down by figures that are supposed to mould the next generation, and I will do my best to be someone my students will remember all the way through College and beyond!"-Sperabo
Might As Well Have Fun With It
"I (M[ale]60) have a terminal bucket list. These are things I'll tap if I get a terminal diagnosis -- mostly, things that I are dangerous enough (or I perceive them to be dangerous enough) that don't want to risk them if things are going OK."
"Things like certain drugs, skydiving, or going back to scuba diving (I got bent badly enough that my diving doctor told me that diving again would most likely kill me)."
"Skydiving is something I'm saving for a dementia diagnosis -- as soon as I forget what that red handle is for, problem solved."-1tacoshort
These Low Effort Jobs Have Surprisingly High Salaries | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Have you ever worked one of those jobs that paid you to kinda sit there? If you have, you know the joy that comes with watching the entirety of Breaking Bad ...I Won't Grow Up
"Maturing, in the sense where I get boring and cranky, and only care about work. If its bound to happen to everybody, I will run away in the opposite direction from it as long as I possibly can."-thatonemanss
How about things you think are better NOT put off? Anything you disagree with?
Drugs Drugs Drugs
"In my personal opinion I believe somebody should do something at least once in their life. That includes drugs."
"If you ever do it, be in a safe environment, I have friends who are not druggies, who will watch over you and help you not gain an addiction. I know this might seem terrible but it's just my opinion, nobody answer agree with it."-IConsumeLead
Interesting Times Are A Curse
"Traveling, I would like to travel the world and see all the beautiful places it has to offer, but given the ever rising tensions and violence it seems the time will never be right...."-Badjib
Teeth And America's Sad Reality
"Going to the Dentist. I'm holding off until dental becomes included in healthcare and gets offered better benefits. How dental is not treated as seriously is insane."-xaviticus
"My teeth are essentially chalk, but I’m trying my hardest to avoid getting dentures as long as I can."
"I like having my own teeth, even if occasionally they explode when biting into food."-ManifestSaviour
These are things people are putting off out of some kind of necessity. Whether or not you agree with it, or recommend it as an expert, these are things people are making choices to do so as to not interfere with their lives.
Even if it seems important—necessity trumps all.
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The big 3-0. For some reason, turning 30 years old has become a very scary thing.
The past two years in particular have been very strange one's to turn the milestone age. Cosmopolitan interviewed a few people who turned 30 turning the pandemic.
One person said:
"Turning 30 is the point at which we're pressured to feel it 'all coming together.'"
Because no one had anything to do on their birthdays, and their once vibrant lives were on pause, that quarter-life crisis feeling wasn't as heavy. They were able to let go of the things they thought they needed in their 20s.
We went to Ask Reddit to learn more about what those things were that needed to change once you hit that magic number.
Redditor Tbonewiz wanted to know:
"What something you should never do after age 30?"
Here's some of Reddit's best suggestions.
Maintaining friendships as an adult.
"Expecting passive friendships to happen. F*ck me, friendship takes a lot of work to build as an adult. Back in school you had excuses to see each other regularly. As an adult you have to construct those scenarios. And if you feel bad that someone hasn't reached out to you in a while then sometimes you gotta suck it up and reach out to them or else you could just end up not talking ever again."
"My friends and I are getting better at actually scheduling things instead of just saying 'we should get together soon!' to each other over and over again until we die."
"I've learned my lesson enough that when someone says 'we should hang out!' I respond with, 'Ok I'm free Saturday, want to get lunch?' I find some people are so bad about waiting for someone else to take initiative so I just do it now. I'm too old and impatient to wait for someone else to do it."
"I tried scheduling a coffee meetup with a coworker who lived nearby. After the 7th cancellation (don't know why I tried so many times) I got the hint."
"She still says that we should get together and catch up. 'Sure, you bet!' I say and forget all about it."
"Forgot to mention that she has a toddler so most of the excuses were doctors appts which seemed legit. Guess that's why I tried till it got ridiculous."
- Luneowl
Keep moving.
"Quit exercising."
"F*cking insane how long it takes me to recover now. At 27-29 I was recovering so damn quick."
"That soreness is motivation for me to stick to it."
"This is a big one. You see those 70 year old's running and hiking like they are still 30. Keep your bodies moving people."
"Move it or lose it."
"Can't quit if you don't start!"
"In 34….after 6 months of heavy exercising my recovery times are the same as my early 20s. The slow recovery times are mostly a symptom of being out of shape rather than age, until like 50."
"I'm 69. My reward for living so long is a pair of twin grandbabies, now 9 months old. They've turned out to be a very efficient squat-training regime, with the added benefit that they automatically up the ante over time by gaining weight."
"They're almost 20lbs each, now; caring for the two of them all day is, I calculated, about 4 squats per hour per baby. It adds up!"
"Note to expectant grandparents: do the work now and get ahead of this game."
Learned from experience.
"Leave the house without peeing first."
"Or going to sleep. Just go now so you don't have to wake up at 3am to pee."
"I have gotten all the way out to my car and thought, nope.... Lemme go back in and pee just in case! Hah!"
- MiLaydee
"The day you leave the house without peeing is the day you get pulled over in your car and have to hold it in while being lectured about speed limits."
"I once had to pee as my train was coming, but I was only about 25 minutes from my destination and would've had to wait a long time for the next one. So I just hopped on without peeing."
"The train had some kind of malfunction about 15 minutes in, and we ended up stopped for well over an hour. I have never had to pee that bad in my life. 0/10 would not recommend, the risk isn't worth it people!"
- jimsmisc
Fill up your tank, always.
"Think that you will actually fill up your gas tank the next morning before work. Don't kid yourself."
- NadiaElm
"I feel personally attacked."
"That's morning guy's problem!"
"F*ck that guy, I'll ruin his day."
"I tried finding the article, but there's some research that says our brains actually consider our future selves as different people, which is part of why we procrastinate."
"Exactly 'it's other guy's problem.'"
"I'll look for the article later, it's that f*cker's problem."
- scsm
Things That Are Normal Where You Live But Crazy Anywhere Else | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
People divulge the things that are normal where they live but crazy anywhere else.#Reddit #BestOfRedditFor more of the latest trending news, Reddit stories, ...Internet arguments in general really.
"Getting in arguments on Reddit, because 90% if the time you will be arguing with some punk-a** 17-23 year old."
"Make your case and walk away."
"You cannot argue on Reddit. You can state fact or opinion, but anything more is a waste of time."
- scw55
"For me, sometimes just typing the comment up and then deleting it without hitting post is enough for me. It gets it out of my system but doesn't further escalate the situation."
"Soooo much this. The best part is they have all this crazy life experience at 13."
"And they all think they are the first ones to learn about logical fallacies and so they try to use the terms against you but they do it incorrectly."
"We all did, it's just a few decades ago no one would listen to our BS for more than a few seconds. Now there's a worldwide megaphone you can tap into at any moment."
You are more than your productivity.
"Feel guilty about work. F*ck that sh*t."
"Remember, you are just a number. If you were to die on a Monday, they would have your position filled by Wednesday."
"I was about 33 when my passion for work went to 0 and I started not caring what they do. I focused more on my personal life and those in my life. Work was just that thing I do for a paycheck."
"Same with me, right down to being 33 years old."
"A switch just flipped after 2020... I busted my a** for 12 months straight, got put on multiple projects, expanded my scope of work, mentored new hires, etc. Got a solid year-end review but nothing that's distinguished myself from anyone else who was phoning it in."
"Yep, I had 6 years of excellent reviews but there was always an excuse for low raises and no promotions. 'we only get so many (promotions) as a company' or 'we are re-organizing' or 'the merger just happened so its a bad time' and so on."
"This is exactly why we have the 'work 3 years at a job then switch companies' mentality. It's the only way to properly get a raise/promotion."
"Indeed. Something that helps me reduce the amount of f*cks I give:"
"In 1 billion years, will anyone or anything give a sh*t about this? 100 years? 1 year?"
"No one lays on their death bed and says they wished they had spent more time at the office."
Go to the doctor.
"Skip routine health check-ups."
"So if I never got em in the first place I'm good to go, right?"
"I'm low key afraid to go see what's wrong with me. Nothing is hurting or anything, but I just know they're gonna be like 'you should be dead.'"
At some point, it's worth it.
"Move without movers."
- MNJayW
"Used movers for the first time a year ago. 0 regrets, I will use them again lol."
"Cost ~$400 for some college kids to move my crap and drive the truck. I hate moving so much that using movers deletes a solid chunk of the associated pain."
"Watching those two young men hoist our couch up and trot it down the stairs into the truck with little effort convinced us to always hire movers. It would have taken us a long time to move the couch and then we would have been exhausted afterwards."
"It's really worth the money."
- bunnyrut
30 isn't old.
"At age 30 you should never think age 30 is old."
"This, I'm mid 30s and I still think I'm a kid and I'm ok with that."
Who cares? You shouldn't.
"Caring about what people think you should or should not be doing at 30."
- nyle2
"Came here to say this. I'm actually healthier as a 35 year old than I ever was as a 25 year old and can actually do stuff I couldn't do in my 20's."
"As a struggling 26 year old this is so nice to hear."
"At a certain point I realized what you should or shouldn't be doing is all just relative to what actually makes you happy. I looked around at some of my friends and a lot of them had kids and got married in their early 20s. Some of them were blissfully happy and some were miserable."
"The ones that were happy were the ones that actually wanted to do that and not because it's what was expected. It became completely apparent to me that doing what people expect will never make you happy. Everyone's different and there is no one path to happiness. Just gotta find your own way and not worry what anyone else has to say."
"Yep, 30s are so much better than your 20s. Whoever said your 20s were the best years of your life was talking out their a**. Your 20s are the worst. Way too much pressure, no money, and an all round slog."
"30s things begin to click into place."
- JxY1989
"I always tell people this. Like I know there is science behind it because our frontal lobe doesn't finish developing until our mid 20s but honestly, for anyone reading, it really does feel like you wake up one day and say, "you know what, I really don't give a fu*k anymore." That's why I don't believe in anyone marrying before 25. The person I was in my 20s is not the person I am in my 30s. I wouldn't want to marry that person. I'm way more chill, and accepting now."
It's no surprise that the older we get, the wiser we become.
"Just wait til you hit 40. I didn't really feel like I had this whole adulting thing down til about then."
We are all just trying to figure out why we are startdust traveling through space on a giant floating rock and what we are going to do with our short time here.
Only you can decide what is right for you.
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People Explain Which Behaviors They're Getting Too Old To Even Tolerate
The cruel reality of life is our looming expiration dates as we age like fine wine.
But now that we've acknowledged a hopefully much-delayed inevitable, it's easy to make the most of our time on this planet and fill it with joy and as much gut-busting fits of laughter.
That meanas not dwelling on the little things that drive us crazy. Because ultimately, are they ever really that bad?
Probably not. We don't have time for that.
"What sh*t are you getting too old for?"

These Redditors talk about protecting their physical temple, since it's the only one we've got.
Blocking Harmful Rays
"Not wearing sunscreen. Just had my 1st melanoma cut out of my arm. Wear sunscreen kids."
– The-Rocketman3
Catching More Zzz's
"Staying up past my bedtime."
– LegoMyEgoYo
"Agreed. I'm currently up past my bedtime and I know I'm gonna regret it.. yet here I am."
Joint Discomfort
"My knees."
– Porgypuncher504
"I hear you. Fractured patella and arthritis don't mix well."
– rek57
These people have become less concerned about nonsense behaviors.
You Do You
"I'm too old to give a damn whether people think my pastimes are ridiculous."
– mcsporrghfghg
Making Excuses
"BS excuses. Stop trying to make up elaborate, unbelievable stories. Just tell me you forgot, or you overslept, or whatever. It's fine. I get it. But don't expect me to believe your convoluted, half-@ss ramblings. Grow up and own your shortcomings."
–jemmo_
Owning The Inner Nerd
"I love that the older I get, the deeper I steep into this pool of 'self.' I used to be deeply secretive of everything I was interested in because it could be seen as 'nerdy' and didn't jive with my 'outer persona'...but now at 31 with a kid of my own, I'm like who gives a f'k? If someone actually cares and thinks I'm a nerd for studying history in my spare time, then bye..? My opinion of you plummeted and I no longer want you in my vicinity."
"I really wish I could instill this in my daughter too, but I know it's not something you can really teach. You have to live through it and come to the conclusion yourself...whenever that may be."
– Caserious
Getting Territorial
"These kids on my damn lawn!"
– Rusky0808
"OMG spot on. I just moved into a new home a month ago. My lawn is dead because the previous owners had moved out months prior and no one watered, so the lawn looks terrible"
"Three neighborhood kids come running down the street playing a game, running through lawns and all, innocent, not destroying anything - and I about lost my shit. 'GET OFF MY LAWN' I yelled out the window. Then immediately felt guilty and old LOL"
"I'm only 40 btw."
– tspielman
A person wasting time beating around the bush to convey their thoughts was considered a huge time suck.
Saying What You Mean To Say
"Playing 'interpret the text message' with people I am dating. I am going to accept what you are saying at face value, and if your actions don't match, I will likely call you on it and flat out ask what's up. We're not teenagers anymore, and I left teenage angst behind long ago!"
– Lilsthecat
Mature Enough To Handle Rejection
"Best part of being an adult. You can cut the bullsh*t."
"With the last girl I dated before I met my wife, I had a sense that her heart really wasn't in it. So I just straight up asked her if that was the case."
'Are you invested in this relationship at all? I won't be angry with your answer, I just need to know if I'm gonna keep making an effort.'
'Honestly, no. You're a great guy but I'm just not feeling it.'
'Good to know. It's been fun, thanks for being honest.'
"Life's too f'king short to jerk people around, or allow it to happen to you."
– coleosis1414
No Time For Decoding Texts
"When my wife and I first got together I had to explain it to her I have no interest in deciphering anything, just tell me exactly what you want and we'll be good. One of the reasons my ex and I are not together was that I got real tired of 'I know I sent you these exact words, but what I REALLY meant was (something different entirely) AND YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT!'"
– thugloofio
Throughout my early adulthood, I've always avoided confrontation.
I've hated it. I always thought if something bothered me enough, the annoyance over something or beef I have with someone would dissipate. But it doesn't. Not for me anyway.
My pent-up resentment was crippling and I've blown up at inappropriate moments when I could've addressed my issues earlier when the collateral damage would've been more minimal.
I speak up more now, and it's no longer something I cower over. The results have been more positive than I ever imagined.
People Divulge The Most Accurate 'You'll Understand When You're Older' Experiences
Growing up, I was pretty positive that my dad was a lunatic who was triggered by lights and ceiling fans. Then I started paying the electric bill ; hey turns out that particular bit of "lunacy" might just be genetic. So is the one that makes you really excited about a good air fryer.
He always told me I would get it when I was older. He was right - crispy fried pork chunks whenever I want them IS awesome. We DO have food at home. It can be better than what we would get at a drive-through.
I just have to do it myself. Bummer.
One Reddit user asked:
What is the single most "you'll understand it when you're older" thing?
... looks like I'm not the only one out here "growing up." Other Reddit users are out here coming to all kinds of adult realizations, and honestly they aren't all thrilled about it, either.
King Triton Was Right ... Until He Was Wrong
King Triton, Ariel's dad was right. She was just a child and she was not "in love" with the random prince she saw for all of 30 seconds.
Honestly, this is a great example of what's wrong with parent-child interactions. When we were kids, we did agree with Ariel. We were persuaded by her emotions and saw her desires as our own.
As adults, we have a fully developed brain (hopefully) and more life experience, and therefore we aren't convinced by the ephemeral, but intense emotions, that kids/teenagers have.
But rather than validating Ariel's feelings, interests, and desires, Triton's basically like: "You're wrong for feeling that way, and also I'm going to destroy your room."
Which actually happens. Parents actually do that and are then surprised when the kid turns to the only validating adult in the room, who just might be a soul-stealing witch.
I really like revisiting media as an adult, not only to see how my sympathies have changed, but also to make sure that I'm not the adult who is perpetuating the conflict by not listening. Because as an adult, I expect better from myself.
Always Be Friends
Friendships fading away
I remember my dad telling me all kinds of cool stories about things him and his friends did in the past. I even asked him "why aren't you still friends with these people?"
He really did basically say "it's complicated, you'll understand when you're older."
Even back then I remember thinking "that's crazy, me and my friends will always be friends."
Sitting here now in my early 30's and it really hits home.
- Slowjams
Boring Is Best
The quiet, boring, simple, times are the best. Everyone's fed, happy, healthy, chill, napping... these are the good times.
So true. Boring = safe. You can't be bored when in survival mode.
When my old roommate's 7-yo would say she was bored he'd reply with something similar. And I would add, "There are no sabertooth cats lurking in the bushes."
After losing a parent, I deeply wished I had a time machine to take me back to when my family was all happy, quiet, bored, asleep under one roof together. I often remind myself that even when things are bad, at some point later I will probably look back and say "those were the good times".
Family Is Expensive
Money.
There was a reason that you didn't get those shoes, the PS5, a new shiny car, etc. Maintaining a home and keeping the family fed is f*cking expensive.
My mom was a single mom. My dad didn't pay child support.
I grew up knowing I could never ask for anything. We never ate out. My grandmother made my clothes.
One time my mom said she couldn't afford to keep me and I would have to go live with my grandmother. I was 12. That was a horrible feeling.
I am very good with money as an adult. I know what it is like to have nothing.
I don't know how my family afforded to have kids.
They definitely made less than like 25k/yr, sometimes WAY less or almost nothing, yet they paid for groceries and utilities and a mortgage and we still got to have presents for the holidays and stuff although there were times when we got groceries from the food bank.
I can barely afford to take care of one person and I make more than they did when I was a kid. They even indulged my expensive obsessions whenever they could and we grew up on that expensive vegetarian health food.
How????? No WAY I could take care of a family on that salary.
Time Flies
Time...wasting time, and how time flies.
It's mid Dec & I'm saying to myself 'what the heck-it's been 9 months of lockdown & I can't believe this year is almost over!'
As you age it seems to go faster & faster. When I was younger I felt like time just dragged on some days.
The thing that is the worst about getting older is seeing your parents and other loved ones age and eventually pass away. When you're a kid (even a high school age kid) you assume these people will just be around forever and things will always stay the same as they were.
It makes it easier to be disrespectful and generally take them for granted. I'm now 35, and this year was the first where I started noticing physical limitations with my dad especially and that was hard. They're minor for now, but it's only going to get worse.
The biggest blow to me is realizing I likely have less than 20 years left with my parents. Losing that constant source of love and support will be hard to take. They've been a rock my entire life.
- 830_L
To add to this, when you're a kid everyone who is already old just continues to be old. It's like nothing really changes.
As you start seeing middle age folk transition into the elderly it's a real dose of reality.
Take The Chicken Out
Why it's so annoying when you forget to take the chicken out of the freezer
The first time that this clicked for me I had to text my dad and say my bad.
- chefhj
My husband literally came home yesterday to me yelling at the frozen chicken I was trying to cut up.. we put it back in the fridge to thaw and ordered pizza hahaha
And so you order take out, leave it to defrost in the refrigerator and then the next day you end up either not wanting to cook or forgetting it's there.
We have a joke now that we pay $30 a chicken breast bc of how much we end up not cooking. Ugh.
He Was Exhausted
When I was a kid my dad and I had a tradition every week of going to the video store and renting a movie or two to watch together. It was one of my favorite things to do, but I remember I used to get really upset at him because every single time we'd actually start to watch the movie he would fall asleep.
It wasn't until I was older that I realized that the reason he would fall asleep was that he was exhausted from working two very physically demanding jobs to try and give me the best life he possibly could.
On top of that, even though he was tired he still made an effort to try and start a little tradition with me and spend time with me. Those memories of me having to nudge my dad awake are so great in my eyes, because they made me realize what a caring and hardworking man he was and still is.
- -eDgAR-
You Can Still Fail
It is possible to do everything right and still fail. Don't let it consume you. Pick up the pieces and move on.
I had to learn this after a project that I was on for 3 years was sabotaged and sh*tcanned. I did some amazing work, and poured my life into that project... in the end I had nothing to show for it.
It put me in a real slump for a few years. I'm still trying to pull myself out of it without becoming a cynical and jaded a-hole.
Thank you for saying this. My unit was closed after 20 years and it has been a struggle. I try to focus on the people helped, things learned. And to find something else that gives me the same thrill. Or maybe comparable thrill.
- skuhlens
Too Sweet?
I used to drink lemonade every time I went out. At some point I switched and for years now I've drank not much other than water.
A few weeks ago I randomly decided I wanted some lemonade with my dinner, and I almost couldn't drink it. It was like pure sugar. Incredible how your taste can change over time.
When adults said something was "too sweet," I literally couldn't comprehend that phrase. It was an oxymoron to me. Sweet = Good. How can something be too good???
Now I completely understand.
It's Not About You
What parents sacrifice just so you can do something fun.
Last night my husband and I sat in a line of cars for an hour and a half so our kids could see this cheesy drive thru light display in my town with Santa and other characters. 0/10 not worth it for us but the kids loved it and it was worth it to see them be able to do a fun Christmas activity during a pandemic.
It made me think of how much my parents had to endure taking my brother and I to theme parks and stuff as a kid just to see us happy. I appreciate it infinitely more now.
When I was pregnant I went to visit my hometown and my friends threw a baby shower for me. I also had a few birthday presents from people for my birthday the month before.
When I was packing to go home, there wasn't room for the baby stuff + the stuff for me, so I took home all the baby stuff and left my presents behind. My Granny said she could bring them up to me at a later date.
I remember sitting there looking at my suitcase with nothing for me being like "oh, so this is how it's going to be."
- riotlady