Reddit user the-embarrassed-goat asked:
"What do you want your last words to be?"
Spoiler alert—we aren't all the sentimental type.
I went into this expecting to find it full of commenters body-slamming one another in the feels. There is that, but there's so much MORE...
It's The Wink That Does It
" 'I'll see you tomorrow. You won't see me, but I'll see you.' "
"*wink*"
"*dies*"
- infinity-o_0
"What if they just keep the body around and come by and high five you every day, who gets the last laugh then?"
- Tooshortimus
"The cops."
- Krillin113
GiphyA Lot About Balls
"I’m not sure what mine would be, but my grandad had some pretty good last words."
"Before he went into a coma and never woke up he said his last words to my uncle, and those words were:"
“ 'Scratch my balls.' ”
"How do I even compete with such an absolute legend?"
- Steppo14
"Similar. My grandpas last words before coma were 'my balls itch.' "
- Hubey808
"My husband suffered a major stroke and didn't speak much after that."
"His last words were when the nurse was giving him a bedside bath. He said: "
" 'Oh babe! That's cold on my balls!' "
- laitnetsixecrisis
GiphyThose E-mails
" 'If only I’d copied & pasted those chain emails…' ”
- BadFishette
"Grandma noooooo!"
- Christmas_Panda
"Holy sh*t!"
"I’m having vivid flashbacks of AOL emails with a bajillion forwards and everybody adds something onto it in different fonts and colors."
- Ignitus1
GiphyThe Blackest Of Humor
"A friend died from cancer some 15 years ago."
"He had the absolute blackest of humour and when he was in the hospice and getting worse he decided to throw a farewell party."
"When he woke up the next morning he said 'Damn it, now I'm feeling better!' "
"While these were not his actual last words, he did die later that day."
- litli
"I spent the last three days of my best friend's life sitting with him. Someone had to drink the whiskey."
"My best friend served in the Marine Corps with me. We had so many adventures. They weren't always great."
"At one point I told him 'I always thought I'd die first.' "
"He said, 'Well, go ahead!' "
- Leatherneck55
GiphyThat Awkward Silence
" 'I left the money in the…' "
- OddRumskie
" *continues to be alive for several minutes in awkward silence* "
- ingenredes
GiphyA Perfect Joke
" 'You guys wanna see a dead body?' "
- Xellith
"This needs more votes - it broke me."
- thegandork
"Forget what I was going to say before. I want to steal this one."
"It's so good!"
- mingey555
GiphyBrotherly Love
"I just wanna let my elder bro know that even though I act mean to him, I love him."
"I know I need to tell him and change our relationship while he is still around. I was kinda embarrassed to tell him if anyone can relate, cuz we've never been clingy to each other."
"So I just bought Hershey's chocolate for him since I know he likes them. He said thanks. It's a start! :) "
- SquareQuestion6
GiphyWould You Like To Know?
"I met a customer once who told me about when his mom was about to pass in her hospital bed."
"She kind of stared off into space for a while, looked at her son and said: "
“ 'Mark, would you like to know what it’s like on the other side?' "
"Then she smiled and passed on. That always chilled me in a really sublime, beautiful way."
"I'd like my last words to be something peaceful like that."
- nonchellent
So We Can Talk Later
"I’d want to tell my family to get an ouija board so we can talk here and there."
- xbxnnyx_
"This comment needs to be further up!"
"It would be so fun to mess with people and watch them freak lol!"
- Emotional-Brilliant4
GiphyAll Dogs
" 'I can see Remi! He‘s waiting for me! Good boy.' ”
"My dog is still alive but I will realistically outlive him. I really hope those are my true last words."
- fatchamy
"This is one of the only things I want an afterlife for. Sure I hope my loved ones are there, but to be able to spend eternity with all my dogs."
"I'd sacrifice learning all the mysteries of the world, to be able to spend it with my dogs. I feel like there's probably not an afterlife, but f*ck I hope so for this reason alone."
- Davadam27
GiphySo which angle do you take for your final moment, readers?
Profound?
Passionate?
Playing for the laugh?
It's your time to shine, fam. The mic is yours.
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