We don't have to look very far to spot hypocricy.
It seems that everywhere we go, there is a bizarre hierarchy of rules and expectations.
You're in the top layer of power or wealth? You get certain rules. Occupying more of a middle zone? Your rules are a little different, a little more restrictive.
It can be so infuriating when double standards are as obvious as they are problematic.
And the worst part? Usually, the person who benefits from the hypocrisy is so powerful and emboldened that they don't even have the decency to be subtle about it.
Meet_Me_In_Heaven asked, "What double standard disgusts you?"
"If you owe a company money, you will be charged interest/late fees/service interruption almost immediately after the due date."
"If a company owes you money, you might see it in 4-6 weeks/2-3 billing cycles."
"Father here. On multiple occasions of taking my either of my children to the 'parents' room to change their nappies whilst out and about, I often receive dirty looks from the mothers and have even been asked to leave once."
"It's a parents room, not mothers. I just want to care for my children the same as you."
Power and Greed
"Right now in Canada, we're in strict lockdown but a dozen of our politicians have been found vacationing around the globe."
"In other words, we can't bury grandma at a funeral, but these politicians can go work their tan."
"Thankfully, many of them have resigned in the last 2 weeks."
"If you always arrive to work late you're in big trouble. If work never finishes on time, 'shrug, no big deal.'" -- Iammeimei
"I offered to work extra hours in a salaried position to get the company over a hurdle if they'd do the honorable thing and comp me hour for hour for my trouble."
"Outright refused, because 'you're salaried,' even though my giving up a few weekends would make a huge difference for their bottom line."
"So when they tried the extra hours mandatory free overtime thing later i told them to pi** up a rope." -- JeffIpsaLoquitor
"'No limit on sick days' policy followed by an annual evaluation where I was told I took the most sick days."
"Either f***ing dock my pay, take away my vacation days, or change your policy. Don't make employees feel like a**holes because of guidelines you laid out for them."
An Array of Expectations, All Impossible to Understand
"As a 17 year old I am expected to act like an adult but treated like child" -- LargePPman_
"The same kind of occurs when you're in college. You're basically treated like a kid who can get arrested and drink, since you're still under your parents' wing." -- CapriciousSalmon
"And yet men only one year older than you lead other men into battle. How we treat people in this age range is really bizarre" -- Kennaham
Man vs. the Institution
"The employee should give two weeks notice, anything else is unprofessional. But the employer will actively obscure their intentions until the very last minute." -- Jetpack-Katt
"My last boss had a nasty habit of, upon finding out that an employee was moving to a company we did work for/bought equipment from, he would call said company and tell them 'if you hire x person, we'll never work with you again.'"
"Then he had the audacity to tell me that it was unprofessional of me to tell him I was quitting day of." -- sjtaylor52
Railing Against the Stereotype
"Baking is for women. I love watching baking shows and seeing the creativity. I was recently inspired to make a father-daughter pact to bake something with my five-year-old daughter at least once a week."
"Next weekend, I am teaching her to make a checkerboard pattern cake (teaching myself, too). Last weekend, we made homemade bread, and she has been asking for a slice of that bread with every meal until now it is almost gone."
No Better Societal Mirror Than Hollywood
"Those romantic comedies with the cliché beautiful and smart woman married to the dumbest guy who is lucky to have her. Swap the roles and see people flip out." -- Devistator
"When movies need an ugly guy, they hire an ugly actor. When they need an ugly girl, they hire a smoking hot actress and put glasses on her" -- imaLilT-pot
A Day is a Day
"If I wake up at 4pm and go to bed at 9am, I'm lazy, do nothing all day, etc."
"Wake up at 4am, bed at 9. You're seen as a responsible member of society."
"Doesn't matter if you work the EXACT same number of hours, make the same money, do the exact amount of housework."
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The internet, as dark is it often becomes, can be a wonderful place to retrieve information.
The anonymity allows people to ask questions they might not ask in real life, and that same anonymity also allows others to give honest answers when they might not have.
Take, for example, the physical differences separating the male and female sexes.
Sure, everyone knows the general distinctions. But when it comes to the nitty gritty details, the subtle nuances of living day to day in a certain body, there's a lot to learn.
Recently, a Reddit thread offered the opportunity for women to ask and men to share about the common "guy problems" that women might not fully understand.
Spoiler alert: most of the content revolved around erections.
Mind the Tip
"Where does your member go when y'all use the toilet? Like does it just hang there? What if you have to poo with a boner?" -- katanavanna
"My boyfriend told me about a certain problem with men's penises sometimes touching the front of the toilet seat when they sit."
"I understand it but I'm glad I don't have to experience it lol" -- anonymouskz
"My husband complains the toilet downstairs is too small so his unit grazes the inside bowl." -- Zetta216
A Remarkably Thoughtful Response
"Where do your balls go when you sit down" -- bellie87
"This is why we usually sit with at least some spread. That being said, they're a bit more flexible and mobile than some people might think. They will find a place, or they WILL let you know that they're not comfortable." -- AlexAlho
"blue balls? like do you get horny and it gets painful?" -- Ovlizin
"It's not 'horny=pain,' but it is real. It's caused by a hypertension in our groin that occurs after prolonged intense arousal. And despite the moderate pain it causes, it is no excuse for any untoward behaviour" -- hrrisn
"Do guys just get random boners?" -- M31K_
"Yes sadly it can be awkward" -- The_nosicle
"From ages 13 to about 25 it's got a mind of it's own. After 35 it gets lazy and has to have a decent chance of actually getting used." -- [deleted]
"Some men i know are overly confident and very insecure at the same time. Is this the societal norm?" -- Kyrilla_Mignon
"Yep, you want to seem confident but it just leaves you insecure" -- hastthouforsakeme
"It's a complicated matter. It starts somewhere between men are not allowed to express their feelings and show no weakness.(boys don't cry) And probably ends with us never get compliments."
"Some of us just get only one compliment a month and this one compliment is what keeps us goin for month, if not years." -- motorfreak937
"I've always been so curious about how men's public bathrooms evolved to be such an 'exposed' experience compared to women's... like, we use a stall no matter what..."
"when men have to pee, they just have a thin sheet of fiberglass or whatever separating one of (what I'd imagine) is one of their most private physical parts from complete strangers."
"How many men just opt to use a stall at all times?"
"When you stick your finger in their belly button and it hurts them in their penis. Why is that connected?" -- 59Trees
"The reason for that is your median umbilical ligament (not to be confused with the medial umbilical ligament). the short story is that when you were a fetus, your bladder emptied through a canal in the umbilical cord."
"The MUL is the remnant of the bladder-navel connection and depending on differences in your individual anatomy, any pressure/pain applied to the belly button can cause a sensation at the tip of the urethra, the root of the penis, the clitoris, labia or g-spot. Or the other way around." -- Timguin
"Beards?? I can't imagine it NOT being annoying having so much hair on your face. Doesn't it get hot? And food get stuck in it?" -- sleepygaybi***
"No, it doesn't get hot. I find it more annoying to have long hair on the head so I don't know how you girls do that. Beards don't get annoying if you keep them trimmed." -- MoobyTheGoldenSock
"Only get hot under a mask, lately. Don't get food stuck in it because I don't eat like an animal, and I always rinse my face after I finish eating (as a just in case measure)"
"Main reason I've cultivated mine is that it's the only thing I can have in my arsenal to conceal my lack of attractive features." -- finch231
"Why do men feel shameful after masturbation?" -- sneeplesteen
"Well, I guess you're talking about post nut clarity." -- Tom_is_a_hero
"Why do some men think it's ok to spit in public? Like what is that about, I don't need to see you spit out a big chunk of phlegm on the street" -- Mq94
"Seen plenty of women spit in public too. I think this just has to do with how you're raised, not which gender you are. Some people just don't learn manners and common decency" -- hrrisn
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Step this way to hear rants about pockets, bare midriffs, and gigantic flowing powdery wigs.
The student of history views the past through all kinds of lenses that layer atop one another.
There are the events, of course. We study the wars, coronations, and frequent redrawing of boundary lines over the course of time. These comprise the staccato heart beats the drive the core of global happenings.
And then there is the ideological layer: which political movements gained traction, how religions picked up speed and exerted influence, the role that scientific advancements played in the dynamics of human civilization.
Those are the key layers, but certainly not the only ones. What about, for example, fashion trends as they developed throughout history? Perhaps the development of recreational tastes demands some examination. And how about mundane household products?
After all, these smaller dynamics are top of mind most often in our daily, contemporary lives. It follows that mundanity drove people's experience of life way back when as well.
One recent Reddit post came at the mundane corner of history in a creative way.
The Woman Your Man Can Smell Like
"Old Spice was launched by Shulton Inc. in 1937. William Lightfoot Schultz was inspired by his mother's potpourri, and as a result, the first Old Spice product in 1937 was a woman's scent called Early American Old Spice."
"The product was received well and therefore followed with Old Spice for men in 1938."
The Great Pocket Debacle
"Large pockets. Pockets were originally meant for women to have in their hoop skirts and such, while noble men had pockets (but they were quite a bit smaller)."
"Now women have practically no pockets and men can literally fit a water bottle in their pants."
A Flexible Brand
"Marlboro cigarettes. Before 'The Marlboro Man' became an icon of rugged masculinity, they were marketed towards women."
"They even offered red colored filter ends that would hide lipstick marks."
"Wrist watches were originally thought to be too feminine for men but during WWI they were found to be easier to use than a pocket watch." -- Due_Holiday8478
"Just guessing but I'd say it was probably its resemblance to a bracelet. If you'd never seen one before (i.e. when they first became a thing) you'd probably have a thought process of something like 'that bracelet has a tiny clock, that's handy!'" -- Creature_03
"Crop tops were originally designed for men to show off their abs" -- FatHeadedGoose
"I'm loving the resurgence of this trend!" -- 4ThaLolz
"Lol after we showed them Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, my 6 year old stepson went into his room and cut the bottom off all his t-shirts so he could be like Ted 😂. People always respond very positively to his crop top look." -- alizarin36
A Store for Everyone
"Victoria's Secret was originally supposed to be a place for men to buy clothes for their wives without feeling embarrassed, but now it's almost exclusively shopped at by women" -- Shuckles116
"Yes, but these days if you go into one as a man looking for something for your girlfriend or wife, the people who work there are SO helpful and nice about everything." -- Lyrre
Different Needs, Same Product
"A lot of the things women wear nowadays: makeup, wigs, high heels, and tights, were brought into fashion by aristocratic European men."
"The makeup they wore was primarily used to cover up the scars and marks from syphilis."
"Women didn't use to be allowed to ride horses at all, or had to ride side-saddle because of their dresses."
"In 2002 when filming the Lord of the Rings trilogy, the production crew couldn't find enough skilled equestrians to be extras, because it was mostly women who still rode recreationally. Most of the Rhohirrim in the movies are actually just like Eowen, women pretending to be men."
A One-Way Street
"Names. Baby names traditionally used for boys will transfer over to girls never the other way. As soon as a boy's name becomes more frequently used by girls it ceases to be given to boys."
"Names like Sydney, Carol, Avery, Shirley, Allison, Robin, Whitney....were all originally boy names."
"Kleenex was originally marketed as women's makeup cleaner, but they started complaining because guy were always sneezing into there tissues" -- Tobin_L
"It's even sillier than that. They were designed as gas mask filters, and Kleenex had a ton of them left after WW2, so they sold them as makeup removers, which then became popular as disposable handkerchiefs." -- I_might_be_weasel
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One of the major bits of logic behind moving away from teaching archaic gender roles is the fact that it's limiting.
Being creative is wonderful, why should that be a feminine thing? Being assertive is wonderful, why should that be a masculine thing? We could go on for days.
In a way, Reddit did when one user asked:
So let's get to it.
Ignorance Is BlissDave Chapelle GIF by MOODMANGiphy
I appreciate how oblivious men can be. I feel like ladies, myself included, tend to read too far in between the lines and guys just seem to go with the flow.
Not gonna lie, I enjoy people thinking I'm oblivious in some situations. If they don't want to talk about something enough to the point of directly saying it, why would I? All I have to do is say or do what ever I would have done; had I not noticed. Life can be easy if you let it.
I appreciate that men can have friendships around mutual interests without demanding full emotional disclosure or constant small talk from their friends.
I was one of three random guys that ended up hanging out together at a bar once. We left when it closed and went over one guys apartment. At one point one guy said this night was fun because it's so hard making friends as guys.
At that point I realized none of us had even exchanged names.
On the flipside though, I think it's awesome that girls can actually open up to each other about emotional stuff. Having so many friendships centered around interests can make them feel pretty hollow sometimes.
Unfortunately this is how all my friendships are. The only people I can talk to anything emotional are women.
Resilience Is Real
I appreciate the resilience of men. There's a lot of pressure on men to "provide" and they make so many sacrifices to meet that expectation.
I appreciate the resilience of women.
You go through periods, pregnancy, and childbirth. You deal with sexual harassment and discrimination and the condescension of men who think they know more than you because you're women. And let's not forget the beauty standards for women in this society that are so impossibly high that even the most beautiful women seem to think there's something wrong with at least one aspect of their bodies.
I don't know how you manage to put up with us.
You Deserve More
I watched my wife give birth to both our kids one vaginal the other cesarean. You ladies do not get enough credit for dealing with childbirth, in my opinion.
My wife had our first daughter's name picked out from when she was a little girl.
I wasn't thrilled about it but after witnessing childbirth live, in-person, she coulda named the kid "Fuzzy Bunny Slippers" and I'd have gone with it. Damn, woman, you earned naming rights after that freaking ordeal, let alone, the pregnancy itself.
The Science Of Softcouple love GIFGiphy
Their skin is so soft and they smell nice.
I really don't get why females usually have softer skin than males.
Hormones play a part in it. When transgender women start hormone therapy, their skin gets softer even if they haven't gained any weight.
And the fibrous connective tissue between skin and fat is also in a straight up and down pattern. In men, it's woven in a crisscross pattern. This is also why cellulite is much more common in women compared to men.
My wife is a licensed massage therapist, and she's done studies on cadavers. I remember her talking about a theory on this that's always made sense to me.
Women have a higher amount of subcutaneous fatty tissue, as others have pointed out, but there are other differences too. Biological males have denser muscles, thicker epidermis, and harder subcutaneous fat, but the biggest difference is actually the structure of the fascia both surrounding the muscles and between muscle fibers.
What she said was that male fascia is like a thick layer of shrink wrap around muscles - muscle density aside, that external support makes their muscles more efficient. Biological female fascia tends to be far more flexible, like female muscles, where the strength is in range of flexibility and ability to expand considerably further without snapping like a rubber band under too much tension.
As she said, its anecdotal, but biologically it makes sense.
Depression And Understanding
The fact that they're generally more supportive whenever my depression gets especially bad. Most of my male friends are either ignorant about mental health, or they fail to understand that it's not as simple as "just don't be sad".
Most of my boys aren't that understanding about it because they haven't gone through depression themselves. That, combined with them being stereotypically masculine when it comes to hiding their emotions, doesn't make it a very safe and productive environment to discuss mental health with them unfortunately
Relatively Few Atrocities
I appreciate that the overwhelming majority of history's atrocities were not committed by women.
When we have the power to commit those atrocities, we will finally have gender equality. We will just have to wait for our day in the sun when we can start a world war and cause millions to die or the earth to burn. It's a distant dream still.
I'm horrible at expressing myself, so hopefully this makes sense. I appreciate how calm men can be lol. When I'm scared, nervous or I need to deal with a big change happening in my life I automatically go on panic mode.
If I talk to my brother, cousin or coworker about the situation they are soooo chill. I'm like OMG!!! but what if this or that happens and their like ... you can handle anything...so if that happens you'll do this or you'll do that lol like so matter a fact about it and I'm like oh yeah... then I feel silly for panicking.
Friends Seem Fun
I love how the friendships work.
I didn't intend on it, but I have only really had guy friends. People always act like I'm boasting or something when I say that but I always wanted a chick friend.
The way they talk and sh*t is so cool. Like they can be so supportive. And the fun birthday sh*t they do!
But girls are very strange when it comes to trust.
Like they will compliment someone and then so openly talk about/ridicule them behind their back.My friends will openly ridicule me and then be so nice behind my back. And they really protect the other. The bromances is also cute.
This isn't the same for everyone like I know that.
My boyfriend will just say "F*ck em'" and it...works?
Ranting for 20 minutes about the issue gives me less pleasure than my boyfriend forcing me to say "f*ck it" to my stress.
I do enjoy milking out a problem with my mom and sister, but sometimes it just prolongs the stress when it's on your mind constantly.
I remember I had a stressful day, and I had "The Itch" to start ranting about it to him when all of a sudden, upon seeing him so comfortably lazy and uncaring of anyone and everything, my mentality switched into Guy Mode.
He asked, "How was work?" I said, "Eh, fine. F*ck em'" He nodded his head and we happily watched tv for the rest of the night.
I have mad respect for you guys who just simply not give a single f*ck. Even when you do, you still don't.
A Freaky Looking Cricket
Honestly? For me it's how they can go from being in war/defend the house against invaders mode to screaming like a 4 year old girl at the sight of a freaky looking cricket.
Son? You were just about to fight the human version of an actual ogre who is twice your size and you can't handle an insect?!
It's my favorite thing. I find it endearing.
Bruh insects are terrifying. Mosquito are my worst enemy. I'll do whatever I can to take them out and not get bit lmao.
Hey crickets are scary! I've woken up to them crawling on my face about 8 to many times, i just cant anymore!
But a recent Reddit thread zeroed in on one gender-based parenting stereotype in particular: the presumption that a father cannot be a equally present and hardworking parental figure as a mother.
Far from the absent, workaholics that populated 1950s movies, these guys love to take care of their children. They like to be vulnerable, teach good character, take care of necessary pieces of child-rearing, and simply enjoy fatherhood.
And yet they are questioned with subtle jokes and the proverbial elbow nudge.
The thread offered a safe haven for all the proudly present fathers out there. These modern patriarchs took turns slamming all the presumptuous onlookers they've ever faced.
"Not a dad myself, but an uncle. My sister in law is a mostly stay at home mom, but teaches a yoga class once or twice a week. My brother obviously has to look over his kids during that time."
"My parents constantly refer to that as babysitting... and it drives me nuts. I constantly interject, and tell them that that's just parenting, but there's just something the older generation doesn't get about that."
How to Silence a Room
"The line 'Yeah ever since their mum died' usually shuts them down pretty quick." -- Guerenica
"That's brutal. I love it." -- deadbass72
"'Actually, I kidnapped them... does that still qualify?'" -- Lemesplain
"I don't have any zingers like that, I usually just tell them that when they're your own kids, they call it 'parenting'" -- BigPZ
A Dad, Beard and All
"As a tall (6'4") and Large (300lb) quit hairy and bearded man with twin girls, when they were younger I got a lot of old ladies saying stuff like 'that man should NOT be with those little girls.'"
"Like yeah, f*** me for looking like sasquatch and having kids, right?"
"As they've gotten older, its got better. I don't get comments like that anymore. But if I take them to the park all of the moms avoid me."
Punished for Being Present
"I became a father at a young age (17) and when I would pick up my daughter and take her out for dinner just me and her--it's a weekly thing for us..."
"you wouldn't believe the dirty looks and rude comments I've received from people about being a creep especially when she was about 14 to age 20..."
"...she's 22 now, and now it has changed to other men giving me the thumbs up and basically saying nice job on getting a young lady, and they having absolutely no clue that I'm just hanging out with my daughter."
"My husband had dinner with this family while I was out of town once. They kept praising him and calling him just such a great dad."
"All because he didn't order alcohol at the restaurant. Because he didn't drive drunk with our kids. That's how low they set the bar for him. Meanwhile they have never called me a good anything."
"He is a good dad and yes, he was annoyed by this."
An Unwanted Title
"I don't know if anyone else gets this line often, but I do. 'Oh, looks like you're Mr. mom today' There's a word for dad. It's dad." -- deadbass72
"I have gotten that a few times."
"After the first time it happened, any time it had happened since, I've looked the person in the eyes and said, 'Yeah, she's Mrs. Dad today, we like to role play like that, kinky isn't it?' and then just continue what I'm doing before I was interrupted." -- masheduppotato
"I think a lot of mothers are annoyed by this too.. it makes it sound as if taking care of the children as solely 'her duty'..."
"...and if the father is being a father, that means she's slacking on her duties and using a 'baby-sitter.'"
Even the Infrastructure is Presumptuous
"To pile on, the worst is when you can't find a baby changing station in the men's room and there is no 'family room.'"
"I've straight up overtaken a women's room, so that I could change a diaper."
"I've never gotten that. However the amount of people that have seen me alone with my daughter and act as though I'm the only man they've seen spending time together with their little girl is literally insane to me."
"One woman insisted on buying our lunch because of it."
"I had this happen a few times when bringing my daughter places. She was 6 when we went I brought her to an auto race. This complete stranger who looks about the same age as me, with his younger girlfriend is leaning back on the seat a few rows down."
"He looks back and says, 'Let me guess. The ex wouldn't keep her this weekend?'"
"I was a bit surprised at the question. But I answered, 'Not at all. Just a father sharing his love of the sport like my father did with me.'"
"Then I held my left hand up and said, 'It's nice to know one of us hasn't failed at marriage or parenting for that matter.'"
"Didn't hear another word from him."