Breaking up is hard to do.
In fact, it's one of life's hardest things.
It sucks when love is over.
But the story is always interesting.
And there is always more than one side to the tale.
When couples retell the fall of their fairytale there is always different aspects and details mentioned.
Everyone has their own view.
And it's always best to hear both.
Or is it?
Redditor U_PassButter wanted to hear several sides of a break-up story, so they asked:
"Let your Ex tell the story; why did your relationship end?"
I don't want to know what embellishments my exes would say.
I was perfect.
Just Stop
Cardi B Applause GIF by Recording Academy / GRAMMYs
Giphy
"He needs to stop being so possessive and controlling. If I wanna f**k my coworker after a shift and take him back to the house and have you catch us. I fully expect you to be okay with all of it."
Initial-Attorney-578
The Privilege
“Well, the real problem was that that a**hole, aknightwhosaysnope, didn’t trust me. If he had trusted me, he never would have looked at my phone and uncovered the affair I’ve been having with one of his best friends, and I could continue to f**k that dude while allowing aknightwhosaysnope the privilege of paying my bills. What a d**k.”
aknightwhosaysnope
In April
“'I changed my phone password because I felt like it. If you need to use it I’ll open it for you.'”
"Cut to April she’s living in NY with her new boyfriend and I’m being served divorce papers. They had been dating for 6 months while we were married."
"The pandemic definitely changed some people, some for the better, but not all."
PissyMillennial
On a Saturday...
"I deliberately picked a fight just like I do every Saturday, to force him to apologize and treat me like a princess for the rest of the weekend. But this time, when I suggested that he didn't love me and we should just break up, he actually had the nerve to agree! I couldn't believe it - that line had always worked in the past to at least get roses and a gift."
"He's such an a**hole - I even refused to leave for a while, giving him the chance to apologize to me and take it back, but he was so stubborn and just flat-out refused!"
"Even when I kept calling his phone over and over from my car, insisting that we spend one last night together, he wouldn't let me back inside his place. I still can't believe that. He owed it to me to at least hold me one more time. I even told him that, and he was still a stubborn jacka** about it."
The_Law_of_Pizza
Why can't people just go to therapy?
Find yourself in trouble.
That's where you're heading.
Not Loyal
Its Over GIF
Giphy
"It was long distance, I avoided all girls as she said, stayed loyal, yet one day I felt she was down, asked what's worrying you? She told me she kissed her BFF and cheated on me, a day later she ended it."
lunar_pilot
Try
"I didn't try hard enough because I couldn't handle the pressure and stress of raising 4 children all under 9 years old, a full-time job, a part-time job, all household maintenance and upkeep, and an alcoholic partner who contributed nothing to the family or the household and drank his entire paycheck every week."
Feral_Attitude
Nothing Happened
"For some reason, he didn't like that I was cuddling with my best friend on the couch. He got it into his head that I was cheating on him (or close to doing it) and decided to end the relationship. Nothing ever happened with my friend, nor did I want it to. The fact that I immediately moved with him to another country was just a coincidence."
Tiny-Device-1127
10 Years Later
"My ex (34 F) after our ten-year marriage ended: 'He was a lovely partner, most of the time. But, his depression got a hold and he just quit enjoying anything at all, including time with me. He hated himself. I couldn't put myself through it anymore'...
"Thankfully, I've (34 M) done a ton of work and found a sense of peace, and I finally love myself. It's been a couple of years now, so, the hurt has (mostly) worn off. We have to co-parent anyway, but, I've found a new friend in my ex. She really did always care about me, even if we struggled to communicate this to each other, while we were together."
nickatnite511
Sins
New Girl Facepalm GIF by HULU
Giphy
"Apparently being committed to one person while dating is obsessive and to care about them even a little bit after the fact is an unforgivable sin."
TooYoungToBeThisOld1
Dating will be the death of everyone.
And apparently, so will love.
Just because someone is an adult or a parent doesn't mean crazy things can't fall out of their mouths every so often.
Sometimes parents say the darndest things.
That's why we should always have a pen or a recording device at the ready.
I suggest the phone.
Just wear fitted tees with pockets and hit record.
You have know idea how much having receipts will pay off mentally later.
Redditor TheGasMove wanted to hear about what things parents have said to their kids that left kids SHOOKETH, so they asked:
"What has a parent said to you that made you go WTF?"
The amount of things my mother has said to me that has left me gobsmacked is endless.
I should've kept a journal.
Comedy gold.
The Proof
Jennifer Lawrence Reaction GIF
Giphy
"After I told my mother that I didn't open up to her or my dad because I didn't trust them with my emotions, she started screaming that she hated me. Like, girl, this is exactly why I don't tell you things 😂."
LandPiranha63
Lessons Learned
"My mom told me that women pooped babies out of their butt. I believed this until I was 12 or 13. Boy, I got laughed at when I used this as my answer when asked in Sex Ed."
Eastern-Operation275
"I (27 F) have divorced parents and my mom always taught me the proper anatomy for things and that it's nothing shameful. On the other end, one day when I was at my dad's, a stray cat gave birth on his porch, and my stepsisters (same age) told my half-sister that it was coming out of the cat's butt, and I was like dude what? I questioned them, and they gave me scornful looks like I just said something offensive. LOL."
SpaceTimeBurrito
SURPRISE!!!
"A few months ago I had gone to do a surprise visit to my grandparents on my dad’s side. While I was driving up their property I saw them walking in their groceries and witnessed seeing my dad for the first time. I had never met my dad in my life but knew my grandparents."
"I walked up and greeted my grandmother and she ushered me over to talk to my father. As I went to greet him this dude threw his hood on and jumped in his truck and locked the doors and said no words to me. Never in my life have I witnessed a grown man run away like that."
Dabtoker3000
Facts...
"My father once told me that between my brother and I, I was his favorite. This caught me off guard because I thought parents weren’t supposed to have favorites."
fun_Dip_fan
"My dad once told me I’m not his favorite. So I told him he’s not my favorite either. Proceeded to get angry."
Honest_Math_7760
"It's problematic to share with your kids that you have a favorite."
LackEfficient7867
Bald Choices
Regret No GIF by Outside TV
Giphy
"I shaved my head at 21 and kept that hairstyle for the last 28 years. My dad walked into my room when I was 26 and asked me for a comb! He looked at me, thought about it for a second, and laughed. RIP dad. I miss you."
Content-Damage8406
It's my hair. I'll do what I want to.
That's the kid's motto.
Adults not so much.
At least that was my experience.
Why Bother?
Ytho GIF
Giphy
"When I called my mother to find out a good time of year to visit her she said, 'What for?'"
Space_T0ilet
Sure Papa Joe!
"Wasn’t my parents but my Grandpa."
“'Josh can you take me to see Marge?' Marge was his long-time girlfriend who had Alzheimer’s. My GP was in his 70s at the time and we took away his car because he was a dangerous man behind the wheel, to say the least. 'Sure Papa Joe!' That or PJoe was his nickname."
"Drive him to the place Marge was cared for at. Stop at the front and ask 'How long until I come back?' He replied 'Give me an hour. That should be long enough for us to have sex.' I start crying laughing and he leaves with a giant smirk. I could never look at him again without thinking or saying 'Almost 80 and still getting after it, WTF!"
ackbosh
The Joker
"Oof. I hadn’t talked to my dad in 15 years. I decided to reach out (for certain reasons and not to restart a relationship). He asked if he could ask me about my life. I let him. I told him, among other things, I was in a wonderful relationship with a terrific gal."
“'Is this a real relationship or like the girlfriends I had when I was with your mother.'”
"I was equally glad I disowned him 15 years ago, disappointed a man and a father would speak like that to his estranged son, and angry that he was the father I was born to. He is just one big joke to me."
Silence-brothers
Chop Chop
Steve Harvey Reaction GIF
Giphy
"I would often visit the kitchen to watch how my mother cooks. One day when my father saw me coming out of the kitchen, he said 'You keep visiting the kitchen, your penis and testicles are gonna fall off. That’s how girls are made.” Context: I was 7 when he said that to me and we are a Korean family."
DeepSleepr
Learning to cook, is a great survival skill.
More dads need to get onboard with that.
Redditor AMGBOI69420 wanted to hear about what it was like to work for the insanely rich, so they asked:
"People who work for the super-wealthy, what stuff have you seen?"
I've also had rich friends who didn't clean clothes.
They bought new every week.
You can't make this stuff up.
Musical Chairs
Make It Rain Money GIF by Tim and EricGiphy"Pumped a bunch of money into the Malibu City counsel in order to change a few seats. This would allow him to have the local ordinance changed so his front doors could be taller than 20 feet."
losthours
A Personal Willow
"Worked as one of four full-time groundskeepers at a large estate. 46 acres of lawn to mow twice a week. 2 clay tennis courts, 3 pools, one for the main house, and one for each of the two guest houses. 100+ acre private lake with boat house. No clue how big the whole estate was including the woods. My personal favorite was the 3-mile personal race track."
"But what really blew my mind was that he hosted his niece's wedding one summer, and paid $350k to have this massive willow tree trucked in and planted by the lake for wedding photos. Only to pay another $50k to have it removed and the landscaping returned to its original state after the wedding because he did not like the look of it."
Rarnah
Different Shades
"I used to work at a jeweler that sold Argyles amongst other precious things. We had one big money customer who never wore anything more than Hawaiian shirts and shorts (think on-holiday Adam Sandler) who would come in and tell us 'I’m feeling like a (color) diamond today.' And we’d show him the collection we had at the time of those colors."
"He had dozens just sitting in our vault. Loved collecting them but he never took one home. Sometimes he’d book a visit and we’d get them out of the vault for him to look at over a glass of whatever drink he felt like. The cheapest I saw him buy in my time there was $130k."
princess_bubble
I Don't Understand
"I often do work for the wives of wealthy professionals. The thing that has always stood out to me is that if I tell them that something they want isn't doable, they respond with literal confusion. It isn't anger. It's confusing. They are so unaccustomed to not being given exactly what they want that it's as if they don't understand what is happening when they are told they can't have something."
ShakyTheBear
Take This
Cash Gifts GIF by DigiGiphy"Not the craziest thing but wild to me."
"I was working for a kind of well-off family during a summer. I went inside to get a drink and the mom was cleaning the kitchen putting things away and such. She picks up a Macbook and says to me 'Hey, do you want this? No one uses it.' Got a brand new Macbook for college."
kingJoffi
I held onto my last Macbook in hopes that someone would just give me a new one.
Like on TV.
It didn't happen.
Let's Party!
Real Estate Thanks GIF by The Masters Division at Nest Seekers InternationalGiphy"I set up a party for a family out in the Hamptons that bought the house next door just to level it and set up a giant temporary party tent on the plot. Wild sh*t."
BinxieSly
Take it All...
"My brother-in-law builds custom homes in the redneck Riviera belt of Florida. One day, he called me to come over to this $15m beach house he was doing a complete remodel of. He was the original builder. He asked me to bring my truck and trailer. I show up, and he walks me through all four floors. He then says, 'The owners have removed all the stuff they want to keep. She has told me to dispose of everything as I see fit. Get what you want.'"
"Furniture, appliances, outdoor furniture, rugs, lamps, artwork, you name it. I don't know the value of everything I took home with me that day, but it was the highest-end stuff I've ever seen. FOUR floors of it, and I only got one trailer load because I simply couldn't fit anything else in my house. I likely had over $20k worth of furniture and appliances on that trailer."
Blackhawk-388
Money well spent
"Had a client come into our 3D printing office. His attention was immediately caught by a large industrial 3d printer in our showroom. Pulled out a credit card and bought a $250k machine on the spot. The best part was when we installed the machine at his facility. The first thing he wanted to print was a meter-tall penis. A few weeks after the install we got a photo of him standing next to the meter penis. Money well spent."
robertcboe
Not a Bad Dude
"An old boss did extremely well and sold off the lion's share of his ownership but wanted to stay involved in the company anyway, so he'd drive his absurd supercar to the office and just hang out. One day he came into the office and it was set up in such a way that the executive offices were in a little 2x2 office glass pod in the middle (with curtains for privacy if needed) and our rows were arrayed around them."
"I'll say this though, he wasn't a bad dude. We may not have seen eye to eye on politics but if you worked for the company he knew your name and would hang around and chat. Super generous around the holidays with time off and the big holiday party/door prizes/stuff of that nature. The company went way downhill when he finally let go of the reigns completely."
GWindborn
Money well spent...
kennedy center honors mic GIFGiphy"I moved the guy that created eBay. He had Aretha Franklin's grand piano (played it) and Elvis Presley's coat (didn't wear it)."
Interesting-Step-654
I want Aretha's piano and Elvis' coat.
I would wear the coat while playing the piano.
Redditor JasperMidnight wanted to hear all the things we've heard that left us in shock, so they asked:
"What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard someone say that they were 100% serious about?"
Sometimes I want to faint when I hear people speak.
Leo Lives! Then Dies!
Leonardo Dicaprio Ok GIFGiphy"English teacher here. Once, while showing my class the Leonardo DiCaprio version of 'Romeo and Juliet,' I had a student staring at the screen in utter confusion for half the movie before she said, 'How can he be in this movie? He died on the Titanic.'"
BlakeMP
Turn Around
"At one of my first jobs as a graphic designer, a client called me into his office and pulled up a photo he took. He then asked me if I could turn it around. No, not rotate it, but turn the viewpoint around. He wanted to see what was behind the camera when he originally took the photo. God, I have so many stories from that job."
HerNameIsRain
Change Direction
"A guy I work with said that a football referee runs over the distance of a marathon during a game. I pointed out that a football game was only 90 minutes long and that the marathon record was just over two hours so that would be impossible. He said it was possible, because a football referee 'changes direction a lot during a game, and it all adds up.'”
tommyhashbrown
Time Zones
"Someone I know argued with me that I do not live anywhere near Canada. He got pretty nasty about it too."
"When I showed him proof he said 'Well I only know Texas.'"
"I live right outside of Detroit, Michigan. Closer to Canada than I am to any other state."
"I have also had a few people argue with me that I do not live in the Eastern time zone. I guess they know better than someone who actually lives here."
msspider66
BRO!
Nbc GIF by SunnysideGiphy"'Yeah bro, it says carbonated because they removed the carbs' while standing in line at a drugstore. Best eavesdrop of my life."
sigmaswan35
Carbs aren't the issue we make them out to be.
They are our friends.
Back then...
No Way Wtf GIF by HarlemGiphy"I was on a date at an art museum. The painting tag said who it was made by the title and made Circe 1600 and she said 'Do you think the earth was even around back then? You just never really know.'"
hi_im_watson
Every Thanksgiving
"I was stationed in Germany in the late 80’s-90’s. Every Thanksgiving multiple dudes would be perplexed as to why the Germans didn’t celebrate. A dude once told me he was excited to celebrate the 4th with the Germans and asked if they did fireworks. I love you my brothers, but some of you are dumb."
420stoner332
"When I was in Germany on a rotation they actually put on an incredible fireworks display for us. So did the Afghans (who used flares from their lil lookout thingies around the fob) when I was deployed. I was astonished and then extremely touched in both scenarios."
LavishnessFew7882
Really Real.
"When I was a kid (and on and off when I was older, until after it was decommissioned) my dad worked at a nuclear power plant. I was mentioning this to a college-aged coworker at one point (I think I was telling a story about taking your daughter to work day or something) and the coworker stops me. 'Wait, those are really real?'"
'I stopped talking, at a loss for words. I then had her repeat what she wanted to know. 'Nuclear power plants are actually real things? I thought they were made up for like The Simpsons.'"
bestem
Thanks, Mr. Murphy
"In college, my teaching assistant in my dinosaur class insisted that roadrunners weren’t real and laughed at me for suggesting it as an answer for a bird that runs fast. But the real dummy was me because I’ve seen one in real life and I still said oh ok."
natsugrayerza
"In grade 6 my class read a poem about ptarmigans where every word starting with 't' was changed to 'pt'. The teacher said that ptarmigans were made-up animals. I countered that they were a type of arctic bird, so he sent me to the school library to find evidence."
"I came back with an encyclopedia and turned to the entry for Ptarmigan and he read it out to the class and told everyone that teachers don't know everything and they should never be afraid to speak up. One of the best teachers I ever had - thanks, Mr. Murphy!"
TheMightyGoatMan
Multiplies...
paul muffins GIF by Big BrotherGiphy"'Blueberry muffins you buy premade don't have any blueberries in them. Blueberries cost too much. They dye bleeds blue because they have the same texture and use them.' He has 'explained' it to multiple people multiple times."
By0z
BAD
"Maybe too obscure but anyway I was the radiation safety office for our lab group many years ago and was telling one of our more truly brilliant (not being sarcastic) PhDs that his badge came up hot, meaning his technique was BAD and he was going to have to be retrained and he said, 'It doesn't affect me, I'm done having my children.' Like being careless with radioactive isotopes can only affect your gonads and not, IDK, give you f**king cancer."
feliciates
Some people really need to think harder before they speak.
This piece is proof.
Do you have any stories to add? let us know in the comment below.