People Reveal The Weirdest Thing Someone's Ever Casually Told Them
Reddit user AlexanderKeef asked: 'What’s the weirdest thing someone casually told you as if it were totally normal?'
Unlike introverts who tend to shy away from engaging in random discussions, those who are comfortable–or too comfortable–in their own skin love to get all chatty.
That doesn't mean they have anything significant to say.
"What’s the weirdest thing someone casually told you as if it were totally normal?"
People whom you don't know tend to overshare as these Redditors experienced.
A High Request
"A story from a friend - in Colorado, someone once asked, 'Could you watch my wolves, I can pay you in weed.'"
"There's a lot to unpack in that question!"
– surlymoe
"You don't unpack wolves, you keep them together."
– hwarang_
Unsolicited Prediction
"Husband (30) and I were pushing our shopping cart out of the grocery store when a random man (who honestly looked like dumbledore) looked at my husband and said 'take my hat, you're gonna need it, you'll be bald very soon.' Obviously my husband didn't take it. It was super odd of him to say because my husband had a FULL head of hair."
"Three months later, my husband was diagnosed with a condition that made him lose all of his hair. Weird coincidence."
– hollyjollyaf
Self-Casting
"A guy once told me how he loved the feeling of wearing casts, so he'd put casts on himself- for days or weeks on end. Even if it meant he couldn't drive and would be stuck at home the entire time. He'd use vacation time just to wear full leg & arm casts."
– Present_Dust_2308
Homophobic Homosexual
A homophobic guy I know: 'Being gay is a choice.'"
"I said something like - ok, choose to be gay for a day, an hour, a single minute if you can."
"Guy - That's easy, I'm attracted to men all the time, I just choose to only like girls because I'm not gay."
"Me - Ummm..."
– discostud1515
Longheld Grudge
"Once, an older woman came up to me on the street, took hold of my wrists and simply said 'they ripped out my afterbirth', and then carried on walking."
– JennyW93
"It's strange to grab strangers. But one day in Walmart, my granny walked ahead of me, and reached to grab me to show me something, without looking and she was pulling on an old lady's arm obliviously, and the old lady's eyes were like O.O."
"My grandma didn't even apologize, she just let go and yelled at me to stay closer."
– chzygorditacrnch
A Hairdresser-In-Training
"I was getting my hair done this last weekend by my daughter at her cosmetology school. One of her fellow students was excited to meet me. She talked nonstop and eventually told me that she has hemorrhoids and that she has her husband push them back in. So much TMI from a stranger!"
– Digjam823
You never know about the personal lives of people you see on a regular basis.
Squeaky Clean
"I had a college professor on the first day of class say that she is obsessed with Q-tips and cleaning her ears and that her family has to limit her to 3 a day-"
– lokeilou
Here's The Story...
"That they have 6 kids, all with different dads & each dad is in prison."
– ChyCgx2
"I once had a coworker who had seven kids with five different women and he'd constantly complain about how most of his paycheck went to child support. You uh, dug your own grave, pal. I'm really not sympathetic to your plight."
– apocalypticradish
It's the end of the world as we know it.
End Of Civilization
"I know a guy, we don't talk often but due to business we cross paths on occasion. More or less every time we talk he asks if I'm ready for the total societal collapse coming next week, or Tuesday, or at the end of the month.. and so on."
"I just tell him that it's not gonna happen; he usually then asks about my "crystal ball" so I remind him that I've been right every time."
– rkpjr
Zombie Apocalypse
"I went to a ComicCon type event in my city years ago(Walking Dead was a new show, first season for reference) and went to a panel about zombies. They talked about historical zombie lore, the first zombie movies, and the exciting first season of the new show Walking Dead, with some actors on the panel. When they opened it up to the audience for questions one of the first ones was, 'what kind of zombies do you predict we’ll have in a real zombie apocalypse? (Fast vs slow)'…panelists don’t really know how to answer, each gives their personal favorite or worst case scenario. Then we get to, 'What do you think the timeline is for the start of a coming zombie apocalypse?' Panelists are kind of like….? Talk about how things usually play out fiction."
“'No, but exactly WHEN do you think we’ll need to be fully prepared for zombies in real life?' Like, guys, these are actors and media studies academics, first of all they don’t have the level of belief you do and second, the people you should be asking about this stuff are probably biologists."
– AlternativeAcademia
Whenever I feel threatened by a homeless person who is pressuring me to hand over them cash, I tell them, "I''m allergic to corn."
The random phrase throws them and in the brief moment they assess what they heard I'm afforded more time to distance myself from them.
It always works, especially when they realize I'm all kinds of crazy and not worth targeting.
I do my absolute best to never... EVER use public toilets.
I will hold it in until I'm about to explode... which isn't the healthiest idea, but anything to not have to use the bathroom away from home.
I've lived in New York long enough to know that public restrooms are a nightmare.
The things you'll find will leave you reeling in disbelief.
Redditor Yoprobro13 wanted to hear about the "treasures" we've discovered while visiting public restrooms.
They asked:
"What is the weirdest thing you found in a public toilet?"
Have you ever used the bathrooms at Penn Station or Port Authority?
If you have, then you know.
If you haven't... you don't want to know.
On the Menu
"Not me, but my husband once found a family-sized serving of spaghetti and meatballs splattered all over the toilet and walls of a bathroom stall. Sometimes I wonder what that person’s story is."
SciFiOp
Giphyhalf a dog...
"I went into an amusement park restroom with my grandfather when I was maybe 5 years old. When I approached the urinal I was about to use I looked down and was dismayed. I told my grandpa that someone's penis had fallen off into the urinal. He reassured me that it was just a half of a hot dog."
reddit_burnr
Seeds
"The most unsettling thing I saw in a public toilet was a massive pile of sunflower seed shells on the floor in a stall at a rest stop on I-40 in NC. And it wasn't just the shells from one of those single-serving snack bags, it was a veritable mountain of shells. Hundreds of them... who the f**k devours a couple of pounds of sunflower seeds while taking a shit at a rest stop? Seriously unsettling."
3nl
$40 where I live...
"I was working at Walmart a few months ago and employees had to use the customer bathrooms. I walked in and there was blood and toilet paper all over the stall and the floor and a bloody menstrual cup on the ground. The reason I was confused was because they cost like $40 where I live, who would just leave it there??"
kindofasatanist
Drenched
"A bag of completely water drenched clothes in the 3rd floor bathroom of a Barnes And Noble."
Tighten_Up
GiphyWhat in the?
Who eats a meal in the toilet?
My word.
I Fainted
"Man when I was in elementary school, some kid pooped a log that would make randy marsh have heart palpitations, it was like 2 feet long, it was so big everyone was getting their friends to come and check it out. I would never be a school janitor."
Slightly-Blasted
Giphy"Kenny"
"On holiday in New York, I was doing my thing in a cubicle when an arm appears with a business card under the stall door. I took it because I panicked but it was surreal. It was a plain white card with a guys name 'Kenny' and a phone number. Turned it over and on the back it read 'Call me for a good time.' I am not certain if the hand was male or female. To be honest, I have a lot of questions, but I never did call the number!"
ClocksOnTime
Bad Greens
"I pile of poop on the floor under the sinks. It was green. I headed back to my table (this was in a TGI Fridays) and told one of the staff about it. Had the best laugh of my life a few minutes later after someone went in to clean it up and we could all hear him yelling 'Oh my god, why is it green?!?'"
Irishpanda1971
Petty Please
"A poop painting and a trail of poop leading to the door. There was dirty granny panties in the garbage and poop on the door handle. Literally couldn't even be bothered to wash her hands. I refused to touch the door handle after that so I called the restaurant I was at and told them I was in the bathroom and I need assistance getting out. Petty, yes."
mydaughterisaqueen
Let's Count
"An abacus. It was in middle school basketball during an away game. Just sitting on one of the sinks."
SirBunBuntheBrave
GiphyI guess some find it suitable to do just about anything in a public restroom.
I'm staying home.
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People looking for a debaucherous night out need to look no further than their local strip joint, where anything can go down. Anything.
You may want to read on and find out the answers Redditor Bartos565 got when they asked:
"What’s the craziest thing you’ve seen in a strip club?"WARNING: NSFW descriptions ahead
Patrons had their expectations annihilated.
Display Of Character
"On Halloween I saw a stripper dressed up as Patrick (inflatable suit version) grinding on a pole."
– vertigo-1996
Cavity Inspection
"Stripper went all around the stage getting on all fours right in front of a small group and giving them a flashlight. She then spread her cheeks and wanted the guys to aim the flashlight and peer inside of her. It was so weird."
– TheShoot141
Not Everything That Happens In Vegas Stays There
"Glitter gulch in Vegas. Holy sh*t was that place rough. Saw a dancer out of her mind of something crawl to the stage, crawl around said stage, stare at a guy for half a song, then crawl back to wherever she came from."
– theoopst
Different Kind Of Blow Job
"A girl in NO took out her nipple piercings, replaced them with matches, lit the matches and had one of the guys in our group blow them out."
"Holy Tamale I won't forget you lmao"
– Yoshable
These Redditors got the best seat in the house. Because they suddenly found themselves actually becoming the seats to be sat on.
There Goes The Tooth
"The girls dragged my buddy onto stage and sat him on a chair. The biggest girl there slammed her a** down on him so hard his false tooth popped out and they had to turn on the lights and everyone was looking for it. They gave him 2 free shots, one to say sorry and the other to put the tooth in to disinfect it."
– someprickinvietnam
Up Close And Personal
"A stripper asked me if I wanted to see a trick. I said 'sure,' and she proceeded to do a handstand on my knees and booty bounce my face. Pretty sure I got whiplash that night."
– tstrickler14
Are the following theatrics interactive or invasive? You decide.
Scent Of A Woman
"An old guy who was a regular would give big tips just to sniff a dancers a**."
– garyda1
Impressive Feat
"Stripper asked me if I had a problem with feet, and I honestly replied ‘no’ before fully thinking it through. Next thing I know, she’s using her feet to remove my glasses, and place them on her own face. Then she takes them off, and puts them back on me, again using only her feet. She was very polite, and I’m sure someone would have paid big bux for such an opportunity, but it was mostly just surprising to me."
– franklin_1717
A Mouthful
"First time in Tijuana the guy on the sidewalk by the entrance offered my friends and I a free beer just to get us in the door. We went in and sat down."
"Two girls came over and one immediately sat on my lap, the other one was like a translator trying to get me to pay her for a dance."
"I turned to my friend to say something and mid sentence the girl on my lap put her boob in my mouth."
– rickyg_79
Flavor Of The Month
"Not so much the dancers, but the female bartender served a shot called 'the dirty O' it was the bar rail run off that she stirred with her finger, after fingering herself."
– justrees
America's Favorite Cookie
"Not seen, but I did have a black stripper ask me and my then spouse (both white) if we wanted to go in the back and make a reverse oreo."
"Edit: Y’all need to calm down. It was like 1:00 pm on a Tuesday and we had a coupon for free drinks."
"She gave me her card though. Do strippers usually have cards?"
– StelleSenzaDio
The Hottest Performance
"Not sure anyone will see this, but here it goes: I was in a strip club in Portland and the staff started moving chairs further away from the stage. The DJ said no one was allowed within 5ft. The girl came out and started fire dancing. She would light a toy on fire, and put it out. Light her vagina on fire. Put it out. All while dancing sexually. A dude gets up and hands her a dollar. She took it... And lit it on fire! Let it burn into nothing, and keep dancing. She was an absolute gangster."
– Oregon85
Some strip clubs fulfilled all the cravings–including hunger.
Major Convenience
"No joke, they had an Arby’s upstairs. It was beautiful."
"Edit: Quick clarification since so many people seem to want to know where this magical place was. I unfortunately don’t remember the exact address as this was just something my friends and I happened to pass by while going on a road trip back in college and decided to check out if there really is a f'king Arby’s in a strip club. What I do remember is this was somewhere in the Los Angeles area. This was also over 10years ago so there’s a good chance this place doesn’t exist anymore, but if you’re in the SoCal area and feeling adventurous I’d say go for it :)"
– TrinixDMorrison
Meat Everywhere
"The one time I worked in a club that had a steakhouse in half if it was AMAZING. Someone was always buying us food."
– xenowife
It Has Appeal
"She opened a bottle of beer with her vagina. Not a screw top bottle either. It was one you need a proper bottle opener for."
"Then another one shot half a banana across the stage. A few minutes later a little old cleaning lady came passed and swept it into her scoop. She took a couple of steps and then looked at another patron and held up the scoop as if to ask if he wanted to eat it. He declined."
"I'm sure you can guess this happened in Thailand."
– NevetsZA
The first time I got into a strip club while visiting San Francisco, I was both in awe and nervous. Up until that moment, I have never seen so many exposed lady parts in an environment where it was perfectly normal.
I was fourteen.
So when I got kicked out after my older brothers' friends snuck me in, the bunny waitress caused a scene and rightfully cursed us out of the room.
I'm sure seeing a pimpled teen with a Shirley Temple being thrown out was the weirdest spectacle those patrons have ever witnessed at their favorite local hang.
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Every couple's origin story is different.
Curious to hear strangers' dating experiences, Redditor HeloPeopelinos asked:
"What was the weirdest way you got into a relationship?"Ready to get started? Okay, cupid.
These Redditors found a spark online.
Mutual Interest
"On the original Napster. She had a very rare live track I wanted, and I had the whole back catalogue of the same artist that she wanted.":
– kevinmorice
It Started With A Rant
"Craigslist used to have (might still have?) a rants and raves section. I posted a long pissed off open letter to how much winter in Chicago sucks."
"A woman answered it and sarcastically made light of just about everything I posted, and we went back and forth for a few emails before meeting up for drinks. Spent close to 3 years together."
– conipto
Chatting
"9GAG hat a chat app called 'Cookies' for a few months. It was basically Twitter for 9GAG and I only used it for a few days. When I posted something, I chatted with a guy for a bit and we found out that we were both from Germany."
"We kept talking on Whatsapp but I had some family and mental health issues which is why we didn’t write with each other for over a year. When I wrote him again apologising for my distant behaviour we started talking again. We’ve been dating for over 5 1/2 years now."
– mrl_a
How Sweet And Tinder
"I erased my tinder because I wasn't into just hook ups and right before I erased it I matched with a cute girl and just said to text me if she wanted because I was going to erase my tinder. She did but only to be my friend and literally 2 months later we started dating. Now she's my best friend and girlfriend coming up to 3 years."
– Deftoones
Some people unexpectedly met their eventual significant others in person.
The Manifestation
"In school, I drew a lot and would often draw randomly made up people."
"Once, I doodled a pretty girl and the girl sitting next to me asked who she was."
"I told her she wasn't a specific person but she thought I was just too shy to say and kept pressing, as well as getting all of the other girls in our class involved."
"And one of them said she knew her. Some girl who went to a nearby school."
"So they asked me if that's who it was and if I'd like them to get her to come meet up with me."
"I said f'k it, yeah."
"We met up that weekend and ended up going out for a few months."
"So, I basically drew a girlfriend into existence."
– BadgerSituation
The Wave
"My ex wife was the consolation prize in a radio contest. Well...kinda."
"I used to co-host a morning radio show back in the 90s, and we did a version of 'The Dating Game' on the air. Just like the classic TV show, we'd have a woman choosing between 3 eligible bachelors, or a man choosing between 3 'bachelorettes.'"
"The winner would get a date paid for by the station, and the runners up would get a consolation prize. Part of my job was to coordinate everything between the contestants. This one day, we had the bachelor in the studio, and three women on the phone. He picked one for his date (it was tickets to a baseball game and dinner at a nice restaurant), and afterwards I got all the information from the runners up so that they could get their prizes."
"One of them sounded really fun on the phone, and we hit it off. Our studio window looked out over the station's lobby, and I told her that if she came in to get her prize while I was still on the air, she should turn and wave at the window."
"A few hours later, I looked out the window and saw her waving. My first thought was 'holy sh*t...she needs a date?' Turns out she was pretty hot...and it turns out that I had her phone number."
"So I called back later and asked her out. Relationship lasted 7 years."
– gogojack
In The Spirit Of Competition
"Was holding tryouts to join our clan in Starcraft around the year 2000."
"She joined our game and it was decided I would 1v1 her while the rest of our clan watched. I kicked her ass and we agreed she could join up with us if she still wanted to. Turned out I couldn't stand her and tried to avoid her like the plague."
"Somehow started talking over AOL instant messenger and ended up learning she was a 4-hour drive away in the state next door. Things fell into place and we ended up in a long-distance relationship at the tender age of 16."
"We celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary this last September. Can still kick her a** in video games. =D"
– Guinnessnomnom
Not every encounter is romantic.
Going Insane
"Met a girl while exploring a creepy abandoned insane asylum at 3am. We were both there with separate groups, neither group was aware of the other group’s presence but we kept hearing one another moving around and scared half out of our minds because we each assumed the other was crazed hobos or criminals using the place as a hideout or something."
"Anyway our groups kept getting closer and closer to one another while trying to figure out how to get out. I turned a corner, saw a face, and nearly brained this poor girl with the baseball bat I was carrying before I realized it was just a bunch of scared college kids same as us. We had a good laugh about it, me and the girl hit it off, and ended up dating for a couple of years."
– KongUnleashed
Mistaken Identity
"Was at a party. Waved at a someone I knew. A girl standing between us who was visibly smashed thought I waved at her. She came over and tripped in the last meter. I caught her."
"That's 10 years ago and we're getting married in august."
– DaPino
Making A Mark
"She threw up in my bed after taking a nap there without asking me on my newyears party."
"Hard to say no to that."
– T0b3yy
The Trade-Off
"Work did a mandatory fun evening at a bar. My then gf came in with a good looking woman, walks past the group I'm with, goes to the bar and proceeds to order two shots of tequila and drinks them off her friends breasts. She then waves me over, some shenanigans happen and in the morning tells me I'm dumped but her friend is single. That lasted about a year. I got traded."
– throwaway198675543
These relationships started off with an apology.
Time Out
"It was an alien themed birthday party. I knew only the person who’s birthday it was. I’ve also got a neurological condition which means sometimes I need to take a time out. So I’m sitting in a beanbag leaning against a wall in a full alien morph suit. My time out must have gone for a while, and people who arrived after me thought I was a decoration as I was motionless."
"This guy trips over my foot, so I moved it. He freaked, and then realised I was a person and came up to apologise. I just gave a thumbs up. Anywhos time passes and I go to get snacks. I take the hood part off and the guy that tripped on me is just staring open mouthed. He eventually comes up to say he first thought I was a decoration, then thought I was a dude. He then spent the rest of the night getting snacks for me."
"Lasted a few months."
– Grieie
NSFW Note
"There was phone number written on the back of a bus I was on when I was 14-15 and under it was written 'will suck dick for money' I was with a few mates and to be a little smart a** show off to my friends I called it and asked if she was for real."
"later that day I felt so bad for the girl I ended up texting her and apologising for being an a**hole and she was grateful for my message and explained that it was her ex that put it there. Anyway, we got texting and I ended up dating her for 3 years. Nice girl."
– braedn
Cupid persevered, regardless of the circumstances.
Oh, Deer
"Hit a deer going about 45, knocked one of my headlights out. The car was drivable, but it was dark and foggy in the country. My crush was with me that evening, and after cursing the deer for a solid 10 minutes, I asked if it was okay if she stayed with me that night instead of me potentially wrecking driving her home."
"She agreed. We got back to my dorm, and I had to use the restroom. I told her I’d fix the bed situation when I got out. I intended to pull the mattress cover off, and let her have the bed for the night while I used the floor."
"Yeah, she didn’t think that. I came out of the bathroom to find her wrapped in my blankets. I asked where I should sleep and she said to just sleep next to her. We ended up cuddling all night and having a tasty campus breakfast date the next morning. We’re still together 2 years later."
– Programmer-Boi
Pandemic Romance
"My ex and I got stuck together at his place on our first Tinder date. For 2 months. Met him during a layover I had where he lived and they closed all the borders a few hours before I was supposed to leave. 2020 was a wild time."
– ApprehensiveStatus13
It wasn't that bizarre, but years ago, I met someone as a straphanger on a packed subway in NYC.
Our train came to a halt in between stations, and we were held there for a good half hour. A fellow passenger sitting down in front of me decided to engage with me with some small talk, which I absolutely cannot stand.
But he was cute.
After exchanging numbers, we ended up having a brief fling. But much like our stuck subway car, we weren't going places, romantically. So I eventually got off that train to nowhere.
It just goes to show you never know the opportunity for a meet-cute could be there in front of you...as long as your eyes aren't glued to Candy Crush on your daily subway commute.
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People hard up for cash will do anything. But what about the other way around?
There are a ton of jobs or favors that don't require much skill, experience, or labor, and people who are fortunate enough to get hired walk away with a king's ransom.
Looking for those kinds of "jobs," however, is like finding a teardrop in the ocean.
Few who struck gold, at least temporarily, shared their experiences when Redditor NikTheNerdBoy asked:
"What's the dumbest thing you were paid to do and how much were you paid?"
Good luck finding these well-paying tasks.
Running Errands
"Had a WFH gig working sort of as a personal assistant for a rich guy on the opposite coast from me. I did all kinds of wacky sh*t for him. For example, one time I had to break up with my boss's girlfriend because he was too wimpy to do it himself. That was literally my job."
"One day, I bought him a new pickup truck. Meaning, I negotiated the deal and paid for the truck with his credit card. All in all, I'd say the process probably took about two weeks, for which I was paid my usual wage at six hours per day. No big deal."
"Somehow, his dad found out about the new truck and he decided he wanted a new pickup truck too. He called me about a week after I bought the truck for my boss and said he'd pay me $2,000 to buy a truck for him. I called the same dealership back, spoke to the same salesman, told him what was up and basically said give me another truck, same price as before. The salesman was only too happy to comply."
"It took ten minutes to make the phone call and then a day or two to get the title and other paperwork sorted out. So, depending on how you look at it, I made $2,000 for just ten minutes worth of 'work.'"
"Somehow, my boss's rich friend found out about all this. He decided he wanted a new SUV. 'OhYeahThrowItAway, you have to buy it for me!' I told him the last time I bought someone a vehicle, I got paid $2,000. The friend was basically like F'k it, I'll pay you $3,000, just get it for me' and then he emailed me his wish list."
"That deal took a little longer, maybe two weeks."
"I made $5k extra in just two months buying vehicles for lazy (or dumb) rich people."
Staying Out Of The Picture
"I was paid $300 to move my car for a movie that was filming by my apartment."
Pack It Up
"Got paid 10k to leave an apartment because it was sold and new owner wanted to move in. I was tenant (renter) under previous owner. I had 4 months left in my rental contract. This was in Spain (Barcelona)."
European Vacation
"I was flown to Paris to do a compliance audit, the systems weren't set up for the audit, couldn't get access so spent the week being taken to restaurants and shopping. On 1 of the days and at the last minute the company decided to send me to London for a meeting, literally just to meet people. I missed the Eurostar because I forgot my passport (totally blanked that I was entering another country), they had to rebook the Eurostar. Nothing was achieved out of this trip. No audit was completed. Nothing came of the meeting. The cost to the company 25k+ for me to do nothing for a week. Corporate money is ridiculous money."
Game For Cleaning
"My friend asked me to clean out his Guinea Pig cage because he couldn't be bothered that day."
"In payment he gave me his copy of Zoo Tycoon 2 for PC." – Bubbly-Crew9697
License To Sit
"Twenty five years ago, and in Indiana, the law was that in order to operate nail salon, someone there must hold a full cosmetology license, not just a nail technician license. A nail salon opened next to the hair salon I worked at and they all held nail technician licenses and the one who held a cosmetology license would be delayed in Korea for a week for whatever reason. At 18 years old, I was paid $25 an hour to merely to sit in the nail salon as the 'holder of the license.' I answered no phones, tended to no clients, did nothing but paint my own nails repeatedly and watch tv for an entire week. Was a sweet, sweet gig."
Not much labor was required for these so-called "jobs."
Ten-Minutes Of "Work"
"I used to work for a PR agency. Every month one of our clients wanted a handful of photos re-sized for their website; nothing fancy, just setting the width to 500px in Windows Photo Manager."
"It was maybe ten minutes of work every month, but the contract said the minimum amount of time we would charge them for was one day - and this was for the full team too, not just me. It must have cost them several hundred pounds every month."
"I showed the client how to do it several times, and explained that they could save a lot of money doing it themselves. They didn't seem to mind."
"In the end I made sure I got it in writing that I'd informed them of their options and let them get on with it."
Thank You, Goodbye
"$175 to do some kind of user study at Netflix, I show up in the lobby and then they go, 'actually we got the data we needed from the studies earlier today, you're free to go!'. Still got paid!"
– Lycid
Hush Money
"I did an event for a national association for deaf people at which they did every presentation in ASL. I am an audio engineer, who specializes in live sound and concerts. I did nothing for 5 days of show, $450 a day."
– murter95
Paid To Play
"I got asked to do 2 hours of barrier watch (Guarding a barrier ribbon while a crew did x rays inside a power plant). This was asked last minute after a 12 hour shift so the bonuses of staying happening to be a Sunday, etc I was being paid $110 to stand and play on my phone and make sure sure nobody tried to pass all the DO NOT ENTER DANGER DANGER signs during a time of day with minimal personnel."
– Hotel29
The Worthy Companion
"When I was 19, I meet an heiress (I think she was in her fifties). She paid me $20 an hour to go to lunch with her. She would take me to five star restaurants and we would shoot the shit for 1-2 hours every week. That is literally all she wanted from me... to sit and eat lunch with her at a fancy restaurant. It was nice, I was poor so that extra 20-40 bucks a week made a big difference and I got to eat some of the best food in Houston. She was a nice lady. I taught her how to pump her own gas and took her to a grocery store for the first time in her life. She taught me proper table manners and that not all rich people are narcissistic jerks."
Gotta Have Wendy's
"I was driving for uber. Picked up a bunch of drunks at like 2 AM. They were like 'Yo we gotta grab some Wendy' I go 'I'm sorry this is my busy period' they go 'Can we bribe you?' I go 'Absolutely you can bribe me.'"
"One the guys said I'll give you $100...I was shocked it was that high, another guy said '$150' and finally his wife said 'F'k it I want Wendy $200 and we buy you Wendy too.'"
"I finally said yes, FYI I hadn't said yes yet because the reality is $20-$40 would have gotten me to stop at Wendy."
"So there I sat at Wendy as those 3 drunks bought me wendy and paid me $200."
Substitute Chef
"One time I was at this super fancy dinner party. I'm talking servers and everything, I was in a freaking tux! It was outside and catered by a professional bbq company. I mean these guys had won international competitions. Well get this, they were double booked and didn't show. The other servers didn't know how to grill, and this totally smokin server in her 30s is just staring at the grill like a deer in the headlights. Well I don't want to be a hero but I ask if I can help. The entire staff spend the rest of the night bringing me drinks as I make this bbq and NOBODY realizes the award winning chefs didn't show up!"
Where Do We Apply?
"Ok this wasn't a job or anything.... But I got 10$ to eat half a watermelon."
Favorable Weather
"Got paid 300$ to shovel my neighbors front steps and driveway while she was away on vacation all winter. It did not even flurry once."
Some opportunities present themselves.
When I was a kid, I hung out at a Japanese summer festival booth where you roll a bowling ball on a track that had two hills. The objective was to push the ball hard enough to get it over the first hill but not too hard to get it over the second hill.
I was fascinated with the challenge and stayed there for a long time as my parents were over by the food booths with their friends.
It was a slow day, and the dude working the booth wanted to peace out for a bit, so he offered to pay me $50 to "hang out" in his stead.
Of course, I said "sure."
No one ever came, and I earned fifty bucks rolling bowling balls for an hour. Was it the dumbest thing I ever did for money? Maybe, but I laughed all the way to the piggy bank that day.
That guy really must have despised his post enough to give a twelve-year-old kid $50.