Redditor Music-and-wine wanted to hear what some therapists thoughts about our wildest issues.
"Therapists, what is something people are afraid to tell you because they think it's weird, but that you've actually heard a lot of times before?"
I think everything I think is weird. So... no shocking here.
Explore
the office therapy GIFGiphy"I have heard some variant of 'This is probably weird, but I feel if I am my true self around others then they won't like me' more times than I can count. As I explore the formative situations to this belief alongside my clients it definitely pulls at my heart strings."
oreganick
Brush them off...
"Intrusive thoughts. Nearly everyone has thoughts about pushing the old lady onto the subway train, swerving into opposing traffic, or stabbing their loved one in the stomach while cooking dinner with them. Some folks, however, take these thoughts very serious that believe that they might act them out. It's called thought-action-fusion. Most of us are able to brush them off, though."
vedderer
'Fit in'
"I'd say a common one is believing that there's something innately, irreparably wrong with them that makes them unable to ever truly 'fit in.' For a lot of people it's such a deeply ingrained belief that it can be extremely painful to acknowledge or express, regardless of the level of personal success in their lives."
GuidedBySteven
On the Daily
"That they don't like their family members, are angry/want to stop communication with their parents etc. I work in a country which Is more culturally collectivist, so not wanting anything to do with your parents makes you an a**hole in the current cultural sense."
"We deal with this almost on a daily basis. There is deep and profound shame in this and when we find that line of 'oh, it might be that your parents are toxic to your mental well being/trigger your trauma' many of my clients actually get visibly angry with me."
"Cultural psychology is so important, cause when I first moved here I had my American/European hat on, oh boy, did I need to adjust."
leonilaa
So far it's agreed. We all need help.
Fail
"Clients become quite fearful of admitting that they weren't successful since the last time they had a session. This could include not succeeding in using a coping skill that they're learning about, or not being able to complete a homework assignment I gave them. Humans aren't robots, and therapy is a lot of work."
"That being said, I don't expect people to be perfect as they start to work on themselves in a positive way. It takes time to really commit to change, especially in relation to trauma or conflicted views that an individual holds. I feel as if the client doesn't want to let me down as their therapist, but these 'failure' events are just as important to talk about as successful moments!'
DnDYetti
Many Questions
"Usually it’s sex related. Shame about their desires or kinks is common. Gender questioning is another. Some people are ashamed of things they did in childhood or adolescence, haven’t ever told anyone and think the team will be horrified. We have heard everything. Everything. I’m always compassionate and always understand why we do the things we do. I’ve yet to have anyone bring something I can’t ‘get.'"
throwaway4u2021
Normal
"Many of my clients lived through severe childhood trauma and neglect. They had no one to model or explain healthy emotions or to show them appropriate ways to react to stress, fear, anger, etc. Most often they’ll describe a completely normal reaction to a stressor and then follow that up with 'I don’t know if that’s normal.' These are adults who were exposed to so much dysfunction during their formative years that they don’t know whether it’s normal to cry when they’re anxious or afraid, feel angry when their boundaries have been violated, etc."
yayeayeah619
Too Close
"Hidden sexual dreams and fantasies about family members. More common than people think, and often stays that way and doesn't really interfere in the person's close relationships unless they allow it. Many things we dream or think are unconscious and involuntary, and the root of such things is often nonsensical."
I'm Done
Tired 90 Day Fiance GIF by TLC EuropeGiphy"Women often feel really ashamed when they tell me they are burnt out on being a parent or that they never want to have kids. I wish all of them knew how common this thought is."
trick_deck
Therapy is rough, but so helpful. Below are some resources to utilize if necessary.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
I've lost count of the number of times I've been left SHOOKETH to the core of my being. Of course being scared seems to be structured into my DNA. I can be thrown off by a mild noise at night. And I faint at the sight of blood, mine or yours.
RIP
Acds2 Look Away GIF by Anime Crimes DivisionGiphy"My brother losing consciousness and falling down the stairs. He lay on the floor with his eyes open and blood coming out of his ear. He was fine after one day at the hospital, but I sure as hell thought I just witnessed the death of my brother."
The Long Driveway
"My dad and grandma waiting for me at the top of our driveway when I got off the bus coming home from kindergarten. My mother had breast cancer and the moment I saw them waiting there together, I knew she was dead. We had a long driveway to begin with but that day it felt like it took an eternity to climb. I knew what they were going to say but I still dreaded hearing it. I've never felt that kind of terror since."
The Blackout
"This happened just this past weekend."
"Came home to find my brother blacked out and when he came to he could barely stand, walk, was in an altered mental state talking like he was drunk. He hadn't eaten or drank anything but water in 3 days and had been sleeping pretty much around the clock. Turns out he's diabetic now and was experiencing Diabetic Ketoacidosis."
"Spent the weekend in the ICU. He blacked out because he was so dehydrated that his heart couldn't properly pump blood and his blood pressure was bottoming out while his heart rate was skyrocketing. His blood glucose was sky high. He's doing better now thankfully. But I thought I was watching my big brother, my best friend, die right in front of me at the time."
- kat4190
In Class
Scared Breaking Bad GIF by davidsaracinoGiphy"A 4th grade student of mine had a seizure, it was just awful and terrifying."
Oh yeah, those people should be thankful I was not around. That is a whole messy lot trauma. Having to be a witness to or a survivor of frightful experiences can leave you changed for life. Let's try to go on...
Pleading
Not Safe For Work No GIFGiphy"Another convict begging the co's not to let him die as he nearly bled out after having his throat cut from ear to ear. It was the begging that I can't forget. I had seen someone killed before and it didn't effect me nearly as much."
Up in Smoke
"The Black Saturday bushfires."
"We were in a small town where my grandmother lived helping her pack up to get to safety. The fire was moving so fast we had maybe 1 minute to move if they sounded the warning to leave. Watching the horizon change colour from black to a dark orange to a full wall of flames in a matter of minutes is freaking intense."
"The trees exploded from the intensity of the heat making these dull popping sounds amongst what sounded like rain from ash and embers falling everywhere. It's worth noting that the town is nestled amongst a bunch of hills in dense bushland with treacherous terrain and we were almost completely surrounded. Every hill glowed for hours."
Last Breathes...
"Finding this young dude after he'd been stabbed like 7 times and trying to comfort him. I knew the guy was going to die and I think he did too. About a year of sleepless nights and a moderate case of PTSD later I've come to terms with what happened."
Best Excuses For Late Assignments That Were Actually True | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Oh Mom
"Seeing my sweet kind terrified mother crying out for death as she dealt with a huge tumor in her esophagus that prevented her from swallowing, after having had brain surgery to remove another tumor, to help with quality of life. I hate cancer."
Pulse Check
"I watched a girl get hit by a car and stopped to help. The panic I had when the guy who got there first said there was no pulse. Lucky in that case he just didn't know how to take a pulse. But 18 months later and I still wonder how she's doing. It's like the old Chinese/Buddhist proverb "if you save a life, you're responsible for it" only I can see how you'd still feel it even if you couldn't do anything."
Terror Cycle
"I survived a plane crash. It was far and away the scariest thing I've ever witnessed. Second behind that was watching a van full of people wrap around a bridge underpass pillar (the driver fell asleep behind the wheel). 6 of the 7 people died - the 7th person was laying in the back seat sleeping and avoided being crushed."
"Strangely enough, about 5 years after that accident, I was in Basic for the Army and met a girl that lived a few hours north of me. She KNEW the people who were killed and their funerals were in her high school gym. It's a small world, folks."
loop time GIFLife Saver
"Finding my husband in a full cardiac arrest. Thankfully I found him very quickly and was able to commence CPR and save his life. There is a slim chance of survival for cardiac arrest so I'm grateful it happened a couple of minutes after I got home. Most terrifying moment of my life."
In the Air
"I was a receptionist at a trucking company. I was sitting the front desk and all of a sudden there was the loudest sound ever and as I looked out the window I saw a small building fly up in the air. Found out later that a welder and his helper had tried to weld something and there was an explosion. They both died. That was pretty sad."
Remaining Scars
"I've seen my brother and another guy get blown up in a natural gas fire. Soaked/emerged in natural gas liquids and ignited Prob 70% skin/ hands looked like shredded white latex gloves with blood dripping from the tears. Lots of hospital time. Remaining scars are relatively Insignificant."
Up in Smoke
Sad GIF by PokémonGiphy"Watching 3000 houses go up in flames about a mile east of me. I had the cats in carriers in the car, ready to go west."
Hearts
"Someone already covered 9/11, so I'll add one that's more existential fear: seeing my dad in recovery after heart surgery. It was only then I really realized how mortal and vulnerable he was, and that he wasn't going to be around forever."
- Athrynne
"I remember walking into the hospital room after my dad had his quadruple bypass surgery. Seeing him unconscious with a ventilator down his throat made me feel so helpless."
PB+J
"When my son was 18 months old I fed him PB+J for the first time for lunch and my wife said he'd already had some at daycare. I laid him down for a nap a short time later like usual after lunch. About 45 minutes later he woke up crying and I could tell he was in pain. I rushed to the room to find him completely swollen. I instantly knew he was allergic to peanuts. I did a 10 minute drive to the hospital in less than 5 minutes."
"The whole time I was thinking his throat would close and I would have to watch my baby boy die in the back seat. I got him there and everything ended up being fine as they treated him instantly. Thankfully his reaction to peanuts, so far, has only ever been a surface reaction and no throat closing. He's 11 now and to this day I've never experienced anything more scary."
Door Issues
"Bus doors closing on me with my mother on the other side as a child and seeing her chase the bus down to get me out. It's not that my mother wasn't watching me, I just found a coin on the ground and of course me being a kid I picked it up and the moron bus driver was too impatient to wait for me to leave, it was literally a 6 second window between my mother getting off and the doors shutting. Thank goodness she made enough noise outside for him to stop and let me out".
Through the Crosswalk...
"I saw a guy on a bike get hit by a car. Guy blew through a crosswalk on his bike when he wasn't supposed to, car came to a stop and bumped him. Car was going maybe 2 miles an hour, but the dude still got flown a good 6 feet. You don't really think about how big and heavy cars are until you see something like that. Anyway, dude got up, shaky as all hell, waved at the car, then pedaled off. Nuts to see."
I would never be able to leave home after seeing things like that, heck just reading it is giving me anxiety. This is why therapy and Xanax are a must have for survival. Good luck out there. The clock is ticking for us all.
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Mommy First
confused one more time GIF by Paramount NetworkGiphyWhen my youngest daughter was 5 we were all sitting together eating a meal when out of nowhere she announced "if we had no food I think we'd kill mommy first because daddy can cook so he can cook her" and then just carried on eating. It's good that she has a plan I guess.
"who's that?"
At grandma's old farmhouse in FL, 4 year old granddaughter looked at the ceiling and asked, "who's that?", grandma replied, "who is who honey?" Daughter, "there's a witch on the ceiling looking at us." Grandma: "well, is she a nice witch or a mean witch, because mean witches aren't allowed in our house." Daughter: "well, she's smiling, but not in a nice way."
She proceeded to watch something on the ceiling track toward the basement door, then went back to her snack.
Edit more context, this is a historic (1910's ish farmhouse in citrus (formerly cattle) country.) I was visiting with my kids and, separate from this, my daughter stopped at the start of the main hallway one day and asked me, pointing to the front door, "daddy, who is that little boy?"
Already freaked out by above I asked what she meant and she abruptly said, "oh never mind he left." I'm not a big ghost believer dude, but I definitely leave 4% of my brainpower open to something I don't understand based on their focus, honest line of questioning and apparent belief in whatever they were or were not seeing. It seemed to surpass the normal "I have an imaginary friend" thinking.
Extra edit for skeptics, this is a house in Fl that actually had a basement, super rare, yes bc of flooding and a low water table, but super creepy basement it has!
"Hi Mommy! I got blood!"
I have twin boys. One of them was prone to nosebleeds when they were little. Real gushers, too. Cured me of any blood aversion I may have had. His nosebleeds got to the point where a black towel was carried in my diaper bag at all times, and I bought him black pillows for his bed because he'd ruin white ones.
One morning when they were about 3, I hear them playing quietly in their room, so I enjoyed a few minutes of extra rest before getting up and starting our day. They were laughing and talking and seemed to be content.
When I got up and went into their room, I found an absolute murder scene. Twin A had gotten an absolute geyser of a nosebleed, and the two of them played with the blood. They were both covered in it, one much more than the other. They were using it to practice writing letters on the wall, and there were dozens of bloody little handprints everywhere.
It was like a freaking horror movie... two little boys covered in blood and giggling, poorly drawn alphabet letters on the wall and dozens of child sized bloody handprints. When they saw me they came running over, all happy, arms outstretched to be picked up and the bloodiest one said "Hi Mommy! I got blood!"
We hate Her
nest GIFGiphyWhen my son was in 3rd grade I noticed he was in deep thought. I asked him what he was thinking about. "How I could kill my teacher and not get caught?"
In his defense, the teacher was a royal witch.
I'm not Jane
Not a parent myself, but still a good story:
At one point I had to share a bed with my 5y/o niece. Things were pretty normal for a while and I was almost asleep. Then I feel it; a tiny hand stroking the back of my head and fingers being run through my hair. I knew it was her because this was not the first time she'd done this. Kinda freaky, but then again, she had always been a weird kid who liked to touch other people to feel comforted. So, figuring she'd probably gotten scared somehow, I let her keep at it for a long time, thinking she would stop soon enough.
But OH NO. Then she started talking to me. She brushed my hair away from my ear, leaned in so that I could feel her breath on my cheek, and said: "Oh, don't worry auntie Jane, I won't kill you and make all your blood and guts come out." With that, she promptly stopped petting my hair, rolled over and went to sleep. Leaving me wide awake and pondering WTH just happened for the next four hours.
(BTW, Jane is not my real name, it just seemed like a good one to use.)
"daddy came home"
I scared my mom once when I was very young. My father was working night shift so he wasn't home at my bedtime. But when my mom was putting me to bed I suddenly said "daddy came home" and when she told me that daddy is still at work I answered "but I saw daddy's hand by the door." Mom grabbed me out of the bed and checked the whole apartment and of course found no one.
And when she put me to bed I just shrugged it off with "maybe it was just a piggy's hoof toes" and apparently was content with that explanation.
I don't remember this myself because I was very young (under 3yo) but my mom has told me the story and said that she was really freaked out.
Lucy
My daughter when about 3 years old was looking at herself in a full length mirror, I said to her "that's you there Lucy" she replied to me "but I'm not Lucy, I'm Hannah". We don't know anyone called Hannah and as far as I know she'd never heard that name in her life. She really meant it to and seemed quite confused.
In the Eye
The Color Purple GIFGiphyApparently when I was 4/5 yrs old I looked my beloved grandad in the eye and said 'I've just started my life, your's is ending.'
Back in before my Day....
When my sister was 2 years old she would often declare that she was actually 82 years old and what had we done with her big purple hat? It might have just been a game but my mom thinks it was a past life thing.
When I was in high school, my friend had a little brother who I think was maybe 8 at the time. Our friend was listening to a 40s swing song in the car (we all had a phase that I'm lowkey still in) and her little brother, from the backseat, said "I love this song!"
We asked him where he had heard it and he said "From before I was born. Then I fell into that hole."
Was mildly disconcerting.
"the dolly is dead"
My 3 year old was playing with her dolls. Then she just looked at us and said "the dolly is dead." I was stunned. We had never taught her that word and had no idea where she got it from. For a while after everything and everyone was either dead or dying or going to die. She also liked to smash her dolls against doorframes. Repeatedly. Then she would say "oh dear, baby needs a doctor". I think at that point baby was so far past a doctor.
"the funny man"
My brothers two year old twins were in their room giggling and laughing at something a couple weeks ago. When I went in there, they were both staring at a corner of the room, and towards the ceiling. When I asked what was so funny, they both just shrieked with laughter and said "the funny man" and kept on laughing.
Falling Water....
breaking tom cruise GIF by Mission ImpossibleGiphyI'm an uncle. My 3 yr old niece has an imaginary friend and blames her for things she did. The last one was pushing a glass full of water and it smashing on the ground. When I asked her why she did it, she said her 'friend' wanted me to slip and fall. When I asked why? She just said "because she wanted you to."
Had to explain to her that wasn't nice and she got mad saying it wasn't her. I dunno man. Kids are freaking weird.
Hey Kebin...
I'm not the parent but the child but my mum told me that when I was younger, I had an imaginary friend or something who I would talk to at night. He was called Kevin but I couldn't pronounce it so I called him Kebin. And one of the stories my mum said was that she didn't really believe in lying to your kids so didn't want me to believe in Santa. But apparently this Kebin guy literally told me everything. Despite her never telling me anything about it, I just suddenly woke up one day and told my mum all about it then said oh Kebin told me. I'm sure there's more stories about Kebin. I was a strange kid.
Slumber time....
My daughter likes to come into our room at night, its fairly common, and normally she just crawls into bed with us and I don't even notice.
But one night I wake up. And she's just standing right next to my head staring directly into my eyes, she smiled and said oh mama, you're awake. Scared the crap out of me.
3 is a rough age....
Once when my son was around 3, he walked up to me and asked if I remember when we were running through the woods being chased, and then we fought with some other people and wore their skins after. 😳 At that point, he was only watching Blues Clues and Bob the Builder. No idea where that came from. He said it so matter of fact. That's what made it creepy!
Where is HE?
Not a parent, but I still think about the time I was coloring with my niece and she looked at me and said, "When I was a ghost, God was not my friend," then resumed coloring. I asked her what he was. "He wasn't there."
She was around 4 at the time. Maybe she heard it from the TV or something, but it still weirded me out a bit.
Beware
death GIFGiphyMy Cousin once said when she saw her father go for a cigarette: "Dad, do you want to die?"
'demon words'
I was playing in a sandbox when I was too li'l to remember this incident. Apparently I stopped, looked at Mom, & calmly stated "The earth is in the hands of the devil." Matter-of-fact, like your kid. Then I went back to playing.
We are not a religious family. Once in a blue moon we went to church to appease my grandparents, but they were Methodist & there was no talk of fire & brimstone in that place because Methodists are fairly chill as far as I can tell.
I don't know where I learned the word 'devil'.
Santa is Scared
Ok I'm not a parent, and this is some random kid, but this is the creepiest thing I have ever heard a kid do.
My sister worked for a mall santa as an elf. So one day she has this little boy come up and sit on santa's lap. Santa asked the boy what he wants for Christmas. The little boy responded that he wants Santa's head in a sack and Santa's arms and legs nailed to his wall.
Santa had to take a break and go out for some fresh air after that one.
Run Auntie....
Originals Coffin GIF by blackbearGiphyI'm not a parent, but apparently my little cousin once pointed at the coffin during a funeral and told my aunt, "Aren't you glad you're still young?"
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