Redditor Flowerlock wanted to hear about the body art that has left people less than attracted, so they asked:
"What tattoo is a turn off?"
I'm thinking about a tattoo, but I don't have the nerve.
This list may have me reconsider.
AHHHHHH!!!!
leopard GIFGiphy"When I was changing with my boyfriend for the first time, he took off his pants and his entire upper left leg was covered with giant leopard spots."
"I almost screamed."
TheBIackened
Follow the Letters
"Misspelled words."
simplyani
"Sometimes it can work out though..."
"Some time ago a girl tweeted she got a Waterparks song tattooed on her and it had been misspelt, which caught the attention of the band and they officially changed to the name of the song to match her misspelt tattoo."
"Just one of those rare instances in life that works out for some unfortunate girl who got a bad tattoo... lmao."
Charlie483
Just, whyyy?!
"Anything poorly drawn. My ex was a hot guy. He got a wolf tattoo on his chest. Omg, it had crossed eyes and a fat weird face and for some reason pine trees embedded in the fur. Ugh. Just, whyyy?!"
EdgeMiserable4381
"My neighbor got a wolf tat done when he was super drunk. Besides the fact that all the detail was blurry, the wolf had a short, stunted muzzle. It was like a pug with a glorious mane."
IntheCompanyofOgres
Basics
"I know everyone has different standards of quality and art is subjective but I think (within reason of course) the worst tattoo is just a badly done one. Lacking a basic understanding of anatomy, bad shading, terrible line quality, patchy colour, etc. I'm not a fan of certain tattoo styles but if they're done well I can respect them."
capricious_achelois
Know Better
Happy Peace Out GIF by AmsterdenimGiphy"Random Chinese words on someone who has no idea what they even say."
chickadeedeedee_
"A friend of mine who visited Korea got a giant tattoo running down her back. She thought it meant 'love my family,' or something like that. I didn't have the heart to tell her that my other friend (a Korean) quietly translated it to 'foreigner.'"
Ccoyotee
Use a translation book friends.
Ownership
Artist Tattoo GIFGiphy"Property of (NOT YOUR NAME)."
masterofallvillainy
"Plot twist: they only date people with the same name so they don't need to remove the tattoo."
HirokoKueh
Gross
"Giant pectoral swastika."
Senator_Chickpea
"Yeah my neighbor has one. He got it in prison years ago."
"As he says it, when he was young he got into trouble, went to prison, joined the Aryan brotherhood for protection, served his sentence and has been trying to distance himself from them for years."
"He got it removed but a scar remains. The scar isn't super big and obvious, but it is noticeable, like a slight mis-colouring of the skin, the kinda thing that draws your eye and your not sure you can see anything, but it's a very distinct pattern and your brain puts together what it is after a bit."
Bigbadsheeple
God Knows
"Only God can judge me."
hunterbidensLT
"A friend of mines father was supposed to get 'Only God can judge me' written in olde’ English font across the width of his back. The tattooist was dyslexic and managed to finish the tattoo with 'Only God can Jude me.'"
"He had to have a cover up of his entire upper back as it couldn’t be fixed. He was an absolute chopper of a bloke and got rinsed for years. People still call him Jude now."
Djr215
Puff Puff
"A Marijuana plant. I like smoking myself and do it often, but I wouldn’t go as far as to tattoo it on me. Those I’ve seen get it tatted on them normally revolve their whole personality around it which is very dull in my opinion."
yeyewestie
"Same goes for the people who wear marijuana leaf attire. My wife likes all that and brags how she’s a bigger pothead than me, and I feel like a fool when I have to be like okay? Like I have a job I can’t be strutting around in that crap... lol."
that_bearded_guy_94
Suddenly...
eff GIFGiphy"My family and I once saw a biker with 'Seymour' written right above his butt crack when we were on a road trip."
Falling_Tomatoes
Be really, really, really sure about body art.
And make sure you like the stencil on your body BEFORE they start inking you.
We're talking placement and size. It never hurts to really think these things through.
"Which type of tattoo makes you cringe the most?"
Leave Calvin Alone!
"Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes peeing on stuff."
"Except the one from Hot Rod with one stream of urine going on the TV set and one going on the FM radio with an AM radio safely dry in the middle on a magic carpet."- alanladdismydad
What Does That Say About Them...
"A defendant in the courtroom I clerked in during law school had 'homicide' tattooed on his face, over his eyebrow."
"Not a great look."- Silidon
Love At First Sight... One Hopes!
"Couple tattoos like portraits or names."
"Mostly when they proudly tell you it’s because they’ve been together for 5 months and just know they stay together forever."- Gingeraffe25
Scared Animation GIF by Jacqueline Jing LinGiphyQuickly Outdated...
"Knew of a guy once who had 'DUBSTEP' tattooed on his chest in VERY VERY large letters."
"He also insisted that dubstep was the future of music and was here to stay."- Shadesmctuba
Choose Your Words Carefully...
"Tattoos that are gifts from you to someone else."
"For example 'for your birthday, I got your birth date tattooed on me!'"
"And tattoos with spelling errors."
"Example 'were you really there if you think you were their?'"- AlexatRF21
Easy To Make Assumptions
"Nothing says 'I've been to prison for cooking Meth in my trailer' like a Joker neck or face tattoo."- Celer_Umbra
Who Needs Love GIF by Trippie ReddGiphyTo Infinity And Beyond...
"Former tattoo artist here, and it has to be infinity symbols."
"ESPECIALLY when they want them to be 'uNiQuE', so they have you spend three hours drawing up different ways of cramming little McKayzleigh and Brackxston’s names, birthdates, birth weights, blood types, and favorite ice cream flavors in there."
"Fine, I’ll find a way."
"I can work for my money."
'"Oh, and can it also have a thin blue line in there for my husband?'"
"Sure, lady."
“And maybe some birds breaking off of it, cause my meemaw loves birds!”
"Sighhhh. Yeah, okay."
“'And can you do it on the side of my finger in white ink?'”
"F*ck you, get out."
"Bonus points on these if they walk in holding a monogrammed Yeti tumbler full of the alcohol they’re trying to smuggle in."- rumpertumpskins
Hickey's Are So Passé
"Lips on the neck."
"I get it, you're a gangster with an attitude problem and probably want to fight."- LooseLeaf24
No One Has Time To Read Anymore
"Sayings, especially ones that span multiple limbs/areas."
"I was in the Army with a guy from Texas that thought he was hard as woodpecker lips."
"Had ‘Cowboy The F*ck Up’ tattooed across his forearms."
"Ostensibly so if he put his fists up to fight you, you would read it and, I don’t know, be scared or something?"
"He never got in any fights that I know of."
" But due to the size he wanted it and sh*tty planning, one arm said COWBOY THE and the other arm simply read F*CK UP."
"And he immediately became known as Cowboy, the f*ck-up."- RistaRicky
GIF by andymilonakisGiphyAnyone considering getting a tattoo should always remember that they're all but permanent.
As far too many people are sadly stuck with a reminder of a past bad decision which greets them every time they look in a mirror.
And often on display for the rest of the world to see as well.
Redditorcarlden3wanted to hear all the deets surrounding outrageous body art.
They asked:
"Tattoo artists of reddit, what is the most fucked up thing you've tattooed?"
I have seen some truly off the wall tats in my day. So I'm interested to hear how what I've seen can be topped.
Help Wil E...
"Tattooist here. The list is long but the one that made me laugh the most that I've done, is Wil E. Coyote's arm poking out of a dudes butt, holding a sign that said 'help.'" ~ Goongalagooo
GiphyWhoops
"Not a professional artist, but my brother in law had jerry rigged up a tattoo gun in the garage out of a hand fan, an eraser, bic pen and a sharpened guitar string. Friend wanted to get a quote from Che Guevara, I'd rather die on my hands than live on my knees, or something along those lines... needle broke after the first T... so dude left our house with a fresh 'I'd rat tat.'" ~ whycantifindmyname
Dude...
"A dude who was a regular customer at an old job got a scorpion on one forearm and a tarantula on the other. Only their heads were replaced by Beavis and Butthead.The lines and details for the arachnid bodies were blown out a bit and blurred- Beavis and Butthead were mostly intact." ~ Vote_4_Cthulhu
"Well crap, I have a tribute to someone close who passed which has his favourite animals wearing Beavis and Buttheads shirts. I see nothing wrong with this." ~ VagueSomething
Billy Jack What?
"Had a woman come into the shop one time way back who looked like she’d been in a tanning booth 8 days a week for the last 40+ years. She wanted to get her locked-up man’s name tattooed on her, but she wanted it 'down there.' She convinced me to get waaaay closer to her jukebox than I was comfortable with, and had me tattoo 'Billy Jack’s P***y' so far up that I think we’re common law related now."
"(Name slightly changed for anonymity). Best part is that a couple weeks later “Billy Jack” called me from prison tell me how much he loved the tattoo. It was a collect call too. God damn it. Thanks for bringing that memory back. I was almost over it, lol." ~ willieyobslayer
Basics...
"My friend's mom got a Mustang car that transitions into horses. Just like one of the basic infinity tattoos that turns into birds, but with a car and horses." ~ Curly_su3
GiphySeriously? I mean... I have no words.
Seriously?
"I'm a detox nurse. A patient had a penis tattooed on the back of his shin so he could tell people he had a-d**k-shin. Addiction. Not making that up lol." ~ jessica4994
GiphyBackwards...
"In prison I knew a guy with half his name scribbled backwards on his forehead. The only explanation I could come up with was he was tattooing himself in the mirror and half way through realized it was coming out backwards to everyone so called it quits." ~ Luke-__-
Over the Pond
"I used to work with a guy who had a tattoo on the side of his body that was a woman squatting over a pond full fire hydrant peeing into it, inside the pond was floating decapitated heads. When I asked him wtf was this he told me that the woman was his ex and the heads were all his kids. I asked why is she peeing on them and he told me he has a pee fetish." ~ Kypriot
I Do... Not!
"Girl had a dream about marrying a dolphin. She got a tattoo of her as a mermaid, rising from the water in an embrace with the dolphin. Halfway through, after hitting on me the whole time and telling me stories about an abusive ex, she started arguing about the colour scheme and left with only the outline and some shading." ~ zombieriot
Gross
"My tattoo artist told me he made a snake out of a guy's penis, scales covering the whole thing. Different strokes for different folks. Pretty gnarly." ~ zygomelonm
GiphyOh my.
People, people, people...
To each their own I guess.
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No to Molly
stephen kings it clown GIFGiphyThe tattoo of a clown holding a gun smoking a joint on my leg. It was done when I was a ten in an apartment.
Antler Art
I don't know the exact English word but in German it's called "butt antlers". I'm not sure what it's actually supposed to represent but it kind of looks like you've got a deer inside your pants.
Now I want to see actual antlers tattooed as a tramp stamp.
<googles>
OK, no, I didn't really want to see that. I wouldn't click this if I were you.
http://www.tattoonow.com/gallery/tattoos/keyword/realistic~133/ass-antlers-by-chris-dingwell~36951
Kissed
Lips on the neck.
I get it, you're a gangster with an attitude problem and probably want to fight.
You get a lot of people with Albuquerque and the New Mexico State symbol tatted on them as well. ABQ is notorious for sh!tty tats... a lot of the work I've seen since living here is really bad honestly.
Joke's on You
heath ledger joker GIFGiphyNothing says "I've been to prison for cooking Meth in my trailer" like a Joker neck or face tattoo.
I knew a guy who got a green question mark because his name was Maurice and because of that song. I'm a joker, I'm a smoker, I'm a midnight toker. I am a comic book fan and told him that's the Riddler's symbol, the Joker's symbol, if any, is the Joker's face. He hung his head and was like, yeah, I know.
Uncouple Please
Couple tattoos like portraits or names. Mostly when they proudly tell you it's because they've been together for 5 months and just know they stay together forever.
The more crap a couple does to prove they're gonna be together forever, the less I believe they're gonna be together forever.
Yeehaw Fail
Sayings, especially ones that span multiple limbs/areas.
I was in the Army with a guy from Texas that thought he was hard as woodpecker lips. Had 'Cowboy The F Up' tattooed across his forearms (ostensibly so if he put his fists up to fight you, you would read it and... I don't know, be scared or something? He never got in any fights that I know of.) But due to the size he wanted it and sh!tty planning, one arm said COWBOY THE and the other arm simply read F UP. And he immediately became known as Cowboy, the f-up.
Oh Karna....
Just saw a couple of days ago a writing on some dude: "Karna isn't a witch" - just as I wrote it.
He's just expressing support for his friend Karna. She might not be a saint, but she isn't a witch.
To be fair, Karna is one of the most interesting characters of Mahabharata, a Sanskrit epic. Oh, and "Karna" literally translates to ear.
Sure hope his ear isn't a witch! :D
Stay with Adults
GiphyThose creepy faces of babies, which looks like there's a little demon on your body.
Baby face are so hard to get right. They don't have the same proportions as adults. Even drawings of babies are creepy 9/10 times.
The Neck Area
I once stood in line behind a lady who had, like, the bad tattoo parade going from the nape of her neck. She had "Only God Can Judge Me", something in Asian characters, and an ugly, faded, poorly drawn crucifix.
I hope the Asian part wasn't her name spelled out in katakana. Really common and really weird. Like you are worried about turning up unconscious in a lost-and-found in Tokyo and this is the only way they'll be able to identify you. All our names sound stupid in the katakana version.
Don't Phone My Home
Sci-Fi Movie GIF by MANGOTEETHGiphyWhen I was in college my friend was talking to some girl he worked with and she brought her very trashy, older friend.
The friend had a tattoo on her shoulder of a face. I said "you must really like E.T, that movie scared the crap out of me as a child." I was being honest, I thought it was E.T. It turns out that it was her daughter. Her daughter looked just like E.T.
How Lyrical?
Knew of a guy once who had "DUBSTEP" tattooed on his chest in VERY VERY large letters. He also insisted that dubstep was the future of music and was here to stay.
Even if it was here to stay, that's still a really stupid tattoo. It would look equally stupid to have POP or HIPHOP on your chest too.
Objection!
phoenix wright objection GIF by CheezburgerGiphyA defendant in the courtroom I clerked in during law school had "homicide" tattooed on his face, over his eyebrow. Not a great look.
Afterlife....
I work with the deceased. I've seen a direct correlation between "ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME" tattoos and being a victim of gunshot homicide. Juggalo tattoos don't bode well for MVAs. Tasmanian Devils go hand in hand with gastric bleeds from chronic alcohol consumption. The clinically depressed seemed to like dolphins.
A Gift
Tattoos that are gifts from you to someone else. For example "For your birthday, I got your birth date tattooed on me!"
And tattoos with spelling errors. Example "Were you really there if you think you were their?"
I thought tattoo presents were just... paying for your friend's tattoo. I'm glad I didn't know that, and wish I could unknow it.
Oh CB....
Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes peeing on stuff. Except the one from Hot Rod with one stream of urine going on the TV set and one going on the FM radio with an AM radio safely dry in the middle on a magic carpet.
Stamped...
stamp GIF by South ParkGiphyI have a tramp stamp that says "no regrets" in very fancy cursive. It's the only tattoo my dad laughed at rather than cringed. I can judge no one.
Body parts
Ones where the person gets a tattoo of someone using either their real nipple or belly button to replace the tattoo of a person's nipple or belly button (e.g. Buddha with real belly button). That is really damn gross, don't get one.
"oh... alright let me go get set up"
My first tattoo I went to get my daughter's name and her birthday. The guy tried so hard to talk me out of it and I couldn't understand why. He goes "man a name and date is just gonna turn into a bad memory one day". And then I realized he thought this was a girlfriend or something. Told him it was my kid and he goes "oh... alright let me go get set up" haha.
More related story. My daughter's mom (ex) has my name tattooed on her wrist and I laugh to myself every time I see her.
FAQs: "he thought you were dating a child??" No I can't imagine. Probably figured it was an anniversary or just didn't look to see what the date actually was.
"Lie to Me"
I'm a tattoo artist. Had a regular come into the shop, he was an older swinger type and my coworker tattooed him.
He got Pinocchio tattooed above his junk with his penis as the nose, and script that said "Lie to Me"
I try not to judge tattoos but I figured you'd all appreciate this one ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Edit: Obligatory "wow this blew up" edit. Thanks everyone for correcting my shrug ♥️
Know what you mean....
mark wahlberg no GIF by Daddy's HomeGiphyAny tattoo with something in Chinese or Japanese written on it. I am learning Japanese coz why not, and I saw this dude with a tattoo saying sakana (fish). I was like, hey what does that mean and he said poison. He may have typed poisson into Google translate lol.
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