Reddit user, [usernameredacted], wanted to know how things went wrong overseas when they asked:
"Tour guides of Reddit, what's the worst thing a tourist has ever done under your supervision?"
Can we all just agree that we should leave animals alone when they're out in their natural habitat? Please?
Don't Tick Off The Bulls
"I worked at a living history farm museum."
"I had a kid that was climbing on stuff the whole tour in the farm house and trying to get behind the Smith in the blacksmith shop during a demo."
"After the tour when people are allowed to roam the grounds, I hear his mom screaming and look over to the barn and this kid has climbed the fence into the field with our long horn oxen and is trying to poke them with a stick."
" I walk over and calmly told him to get out of the field before our lazy oxen decide they've had enough, but this jack off decides to look me in the eye and smack Ted on the butt with the stick like it's a riding crop."
"Ted, bless him, just kinda jumps a little and whips his head around with a WTF dude look on his face."
"But seeing as he's a long horn, he just wipes this kid out with one of his horns when he turned his head."
"Kid goes flying into the dirt and is having a melt down."
"Mom is freaking out. I'm like dude, get the hell out of the pen before Ted actually gets mad."
"So this kid is crying and trying to climb the fence out of the field and Bill, who has been watching this whole thing waits until the kid is almost over the fence and walks up to him and nudges him in the butt with his nose and pushes him off the top of the fence."
"It was everything I could do to keep from laughing."
"Kid was fine, Ted was fine, but the kid and his mom were promptly kicked out of the museum."
"Their dad and little sister were allowed to stay because she was well behaved and was just enjoying petting the goats at the petting zoo."
"So since the kid had to leave but his sister didn't there was a temper tantrum in the parking lot that could be heard all the way to the other side of the farm."
"But the oxen got some extra grain that night, so I guess they won in the end."- PtolemyShadow
Crypto Bitcoin GIF by ProBit GlobalGiphySnap, Snap
"Tour guide at a university."
"Small group gets into our gardens where there's a big turtle pond."
"Girl gets excited and wants a close up of the largest snapping turtle."
"Girl loses her phone to the turtle and tries to get the university to buy her a new one."
"Girl was lucky she still has all her fingers..." - Bengmann
Yank, Yank, OW
"My cousin is a tourist guide and biologist, most of his tours are in Africa."
"He instructed his group of 20-25 people including kids not to wear any type of earrings or collars especially shiny stuff since they were about to go into a thick forest to try to see a bunch of animals."
"This is very important because 20-25 make a lot of noise which makes wild animals run away or hide, it's even worse if they're wearing shiny stuff they can spot from far away."
"Ok so this woman complains, decides to wear shiny earrings anyway, cousin tells her to get rid of them or she ain't coming with the group so she obeys but puts them on a bit later."
"Some species of monkeys in that area LOVE shiny stuff. They ripped the earrings from her ears."- shave_your_teeth_pls
Learn To Keep Your Hands To Yourself
"I was working on a tourist island in Australia when this man pulled out almost all the back feathers of a peacock because he wanted to keep one."
"He sneaked up behind it, and grabbed a huge handful and yanked them all out."
"He was immediately escorted off the island."
"The peacock had a huge bare patch and most of its beautiful feathers were gone :("- mugsandcoveve
Dance Dancing GIF by BBCGiphyPunching Way Above Their Weight Class
"I had a guest, snorkeling try and grab the tail of a barracuda as he swam up behind it."
"Luckily I was able to hit the guest with a dive fin from the boat to stop him before he got ahold. If he had grabbed on, I’m sure he would have been ripped to pieces by that fish." - fkirwan82
You have to wonder what kind of people aren't going to listen to the tour guide. Honestly, it's not hard. Just don't do the thing they're telling you not to do.
Why Wouldn't You At Least Take A Swimming Lesson First?
"Former whitewater rafting guide."
"There's a calmer section of the river people can, if they choose to, hop out and swim through."
"They are wearing life jackets so you can just float through it."
"This woman decides she wants to try it and hops out."
"After she pops up she slowly tilts forward until just the back of her jacket is out of the water and she's completely still."
"After 5 or so seconds of this I start to realize this might not be intentional and paddle over and physically pick her head up above the water followed by her gasping for air."
"I haul her in the boat and ask what happened."
"She said she didn't know what to do as she'd 'never been submerged in water before'."
"1) why are you on a whitewater rafting trip?"
"2) why didn't your strategy involve moving your body?"- b771
GiphyThankful For Teachers Every Day
"I used to work at a heritage site. It was an old military installation with a lot of remaining original structures (bunk beds, cafeteria equipment, computers etc.)."
"Everyday it was a constant effort to remind people (read: kids) NOT to jump on the beds, not to slam doors open, not to punch every button like it owes them money."
"The absolute worst was a group of kids on a school trip."
"Within the first ten minutes we're walking through the tech portion of the exhibit, where we had a wall lined with Burroughs large systems machines (B5000's), all behind this little fence about waist-high."
"I turn to demonstrate some of the pieces, and when I look back at the group one of them had jumped over the barrier, opened one of the units and started pulling out handfuls of digital tape from the reels inside."
"I just about jumped on the kid when their teacher did just that."
"She jumped the barrier, smacked the kids hands and took him outside."
"I immediately ended the tour and had them all refunded, as I couldn't imagine what else could happen."- sassymatty
But, of course, they don't listen.
And bad things happen.
You Tell Them What Would Happen, And Then It Happens
"I work at a brewery tap room and take people on brewery tours."
"During fermentation CO2 is produced and excess comes out through a run off pipe and into a water bucket."
"One of the attendees, who was being a pain and trying to be funny but nobody was laughing, asked me what the pipe was for, so I gladly explained."
"He then asked what would happen if he breathed it in... in disbelief of his stupidity I told him he would pass out/damage his brain, he then proceeded to grab the pipe and take a breath."
"He was then ejected and barred. Some people are just beyond belief."- tedandrassy
But...Why?
"Friend of mine does tours of whiskey museums in Dublin."
"Someone took a sh-t in one of the exhibition rooms."- Eoinoconn
You Get What You Deserve
"I work at the National Cathedral, and a tourist took a small votive candle, and lit their friend's hat on fire."
"It didn't spread or set off any alarms, but it got through most of his hat and almost caught his hair on fire."
"He was also really overreacting, and he threw his burned hat into the organ."
"The Cathedral suffered from earthquake damage in 2011, and we borrowed one of their ladders to get it down."-not_hacking12
Fox Tv Fire GIF by Bob's BurgersGiphy"You're trying to seduce me... aren't you?"
"Bit late to the party, but what the heck."
"I gave tours in the French Quarter in New Orleans for about a year, and I had this one drunk older woman who kept nip-slipping and trying to flirt with me as I was trying to talk."
"It was really uncomfortable and kept throwing off my focus, but thankfully she wandered off about halfway through the tour."- Throway9591
We like to live dangerously
"Ran after a bear cub trying to get a picture."
"Was astonished after I yelled at them and asked 'are they dangerous?'
'Yes they are'."
"'They're bears'."
"Two days ago I warned a few people about an agitated moose up the trail and two of them got excited and ran towards it with cameras while I tried to explain why that was an awful idea."
"Tourists f*cking crave death I swear to god."- plantoyo
Maybe I'll listen next time
"Not a tour guide, just an idiot."
"About ten years ago, my grandma took me and my sister on what we decided to affectionately call an 'Old People Bus Tour' out west for a couple of weeks."
"Our parents decided to come along as well because it seemed fun, and it totally was."
"We went all over and saw some really amazing sights, but when we got to Arches National Park, for SOME unknown reason my Monkey Brain kicked in and went 'IMMA CLIMB IT!' as soon as we got to the entrance of the first path."
"Thankfully, it wasn't enormously dangerous, but it wasn't until I spontaneously scaled the bottom half of the arch and turned around to sit proudly looking at everything that I saw everybody's faces and it clicked that maybe I should climb back down and knock it off."
"I wish I could use the excuse that I was just a dumb kid, but I was in my mid 20s at the time."- MyLaundryStinks
Fall Climbing GIF by KletterRetterGiphyHow long have you got?
"I was a tour guide in hollywood for a few years."
"I cannot even begin to choose a story."- adhominem4theweak
Putting everyone in danger
"Tour guide here, there was this one guy who tried to swim in the ocean at Peggy’s cove."
"As some of you may know the currents are incredibly strong and I had warned everyone to not even go near the ocean."
"But this one moron didn’t listen and I had to hall his a** back to shore."
"We both almost drowned."
"D*ck."- LegendaryPineappleYT
Mind the gap
"Customer."
"So the tourist was in front of the tour guide."
"He said SHUT YOUR’E F*CKING MOUTH UP to a woman."
"I think was on a vacation with her child and she only yawned before She said SIR DO NOT SAY THAT INFRONT OF MY CHILD and she smacked him and he fell of the cliff and almost died."
"I went down and I said Sir are uh you okay?"
"He said NO IM NOT F*CKING OKAY YOU FUCKING DUMBASS."- f*ckboymigeee
Why do American tourists get such a bad rap?
"Not the worst on here but still bad."
"In between years one and two of uni, I took a job in a musem showing people around talking about the stuff on show."
"The group was behaving mostly ok, but this one American family, trying to touch things that out not be touched."
"And just being loud and obnoxious."
"I think I have it all under contorl untill we enter the Gree/Roman rooms."
"We have a replica Roman Legionary armor, weapon sheild and stick which held all the equipment."
"All in all its about 45KG (about 7stone) in weight for everything."
"Now this can be tried on to show people what Roman Legionaires had to go thorough on a march. we stopped to let those that wanted to, to try it on. now it was very clear that the dad, think Gun toting Texan from the Simpsons, was far to large for the armor, but i didn't say anything as even if he and his kin have been d*cks."
"I don't want to be rude."
"Anyway after it becomes clear even the helmet wont fit he gets moody and just drops it to the floor, lucky another group member caught it in time, and wanders of to 'look' at the real weapons that had been revoved from dig sites."
" Now one of the pride and joys of this museum is a fully intact Roman short sword with battle nicks showing that it had been used in battle, now these are far and few between, so anyone thats found is hightly exsiting for the Achaeologist that uncovers it."
"Anyway I am giving my speech about how far the Legionnaires had to march in a day and the set up of camps and the like, when there is a loud SMASH from the sword case,followed by the alarm going off."
" This dumb American had tried to prize open the case to get a better 'look' at it."
"There's lots of yelling as guards rush in."
" The damn fool still tried to pick it up but when he saw the guard rushing him he dropped it back into the stand THANK THE GODS IT DIDN'T BRAKE."
"He and his family were promptly kicked out and band for life but not before he offered to buy the sword."
"'I'll give y'all $20 for the thing and maybe we can for get the glass'."
"$20 you heard read it right."
"These things if sold, they really shouldn't be, go for 10 of thousands of pounds."- Emrys91·3y ago
GIF by The Last TouristGiphyWhen you Gotta go...
"Cave tour guide."
"South American man pisses on the floor during total darkness."- ZootZephyr
"Would you like to ride in my beautiful balloon?"
"Not a tour guide."
"Went on a Hot Air Balloon Tour of the Temecula Valley and our tour guide told us this story he experienced."
"For those that don't know, Hot Air Balloons have ZERO safety features for the passengers."
"You can fall or jump out very easily."
"So our guide was on a tour and somebody jumped out of the balloon."
"Turns out he had a parachute on."
"Don't remember exactly what happened to him, but he did get in legal trouble, of course."-
Who's the real animal here?
"I was on a trip to Thailand and we were at this Night Safari place, it wasn't a legit safari thank goodness, and we were all on the tram type thing and we went into the hyenas cage and this guy jumps out and tries to take a selfie with it."
"Luckily they were just fed and weren't as wild as the ones in the wild."
"He ran back as a few started to get up and yip."
"Afterward he was kicked out with no refund as you would expect."
"Some people just blow my mind."- SirDankius
the lion king laughing GIFGiphyJust follow the rules next time you're in a tour group?
It's that simple.
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But at least humans are smart enough to accept their dumbness. They invent items and services to keep everyone safe and secure, despite people's seeming insistence on screwing everything up.
Or, humans are so dumb that something continues to be around despite obvious solutions that we insist on not pursuing.
Whatever underlies it, the outcome is the same: our world is full of things that do not need to be here
Heel-Hook asked, "What exists only because humans are dumb?"
Out of the Kitchen
gordon ramsey GIFGiphyWorst Cooks in America.
I literally found out about this today.
Some guy decided to try to add more flavor into his steak (I think) by adding butter. This is a good idea, but it would have been a better idea if he took the butter out of the wrapping before putting it into the pan.
DUH!
Disclaimer before UFC fight: this may include violence.
Well yeah it better freaking contain violence, that's what I'm here for.
"no swimming"Â
No swimming sticker on places that are physically not possible to swim at.
Yeah they're for the people who are too dumb to realize it would be suicidal to try and swim somewhere, so really they're necessary because I saw a guy hop in to a river from a bridge over a wier and then go over it. He held onto the "no swimming" sign to stand on the railing to jump over. He was fine, but only because the water level up top was lower than usual.
Not at Home....
'Don't try this at home' warnings.
Let's be fair, the show Mythbusters needed this. Some of their things came from stupid people or were ideas that could possibly be recreated at home.
Dummy GIF by memecandyEnd of Life
A lot of senseless deaths. Everyone who ever died of a preventable cause of death.
Less then 30....
Congressmen with 30+ years in office.
I guess that depends on perspective. The least corrupt and most honest person in Congress has been there that long.
Deep Cuts
Safety scissors.
Not even safe either. I have a scar from a pair. Go through skin just as well.
K Ok GIF by OriginalsBloodshed.
War. HOO. What is it good for?
Corporate entities not in the war-zone.
It's Whack.
Tik Tok.
Just saying this before someone else will say it.
the cycle
excited news GIFGiphyMedia, modern day as we know it. 24 hour news cycles, censorship, click bait, all of it.
Cool Off....
The "caution: hot beverage" labels.
The dumb ones in this case are companies like McDonald's that permanently disfigured a customer with super hot coffee, then did everything they could to make people think she was at fault.
All of the Above
Climate change, sea level rise, depletion of fisheries, whaling, War on Drugs, Global War on Terror, war, genocide, racism, wars of religion...
daylight savings GIF by ScreenJunkiesFor Hope
Religions. Sorry if this makes anyone mad, but aren't religions made to explain things we can't understand?
It can do more than that. It brings many hope and purpose, and then there's always the imbeciles who justify hate with it.
It wasn't, but we like to view the politics of all history through the lens of today's culture. sure, maybe a peasant's life revolved totally around their faith-but that doesn't mean the primary purpose of the priests was to take his crops. before travel was easy and most people could read and write, the Church was the power and the social structure of most of Europe. but to say that it's history was wholly one of a desire for control was disingenuous.
The Best Dope
sad leonardo dicaprio GIFGiphyThe Darwin awards.
That is very true considering they're literally awards for the world's biggest idiots.
2020!!!
Donald Trump's presidency.
I'm not surprised anymore. 46% voted for that guy in the first place despite all the crap he'd done before. I swear if he wins again I give up on America.
This isn't lettuce?
fruit of the loom GIF by NBAGiphyI found warning labels on fruit salad saying "Warning contains fruits."
Just Wait.Â
The loading progress bar was made because the people brought for testing thought something was wrong.
Yeah, providing feedback that the program is running and hasn't crashed is an important part of UI design.
100% sugar
Ingredients labels on flour, sugar, raisins, etc.
It's because of standards more than for stupid people. There aren't many people wondering which ingredients sugar contains (spoiler: it contains 100% sugar), but all products intended for human consumption are required to have an ingredient lists.
Putting the ingredients on items which are just a single ingredient may be a bit ridiculous, but it doesn't harm anyone and it's probably better than coming up with possibly confusing exceptions for that regulation.
It's for Health.Â
Marijuana criminalization.
That had more to do with taxes and lobbyists from the cotton industry.
In the U.S. at least.
Aide says Nixon's war on drugs targeted blacks, hippies
"You understand what I'm saying? We knew we couldn't make it illegal to be either against the war or black, but by getting the public to associate the hippies with marijuana and blacks with heroin. And then criminalizing both heavily, we could disrupt those communities," zomboromcom
BACK UP FOOLS!!!
Fences and railings at the Grand Canyon.
This one made me chuckle. I visited the Grand Canyon Visitor's Center last year in July, peak summer, peak tourism. Lots of tourists.
Thing is, the visitors center is right up at the side of a freaking cliff. A several hundred foot high cliff. Sheer rock, no incline. And yet, on that day, I could not fight my polite urge to let people be themselves. People were literally getting on top of the rock railing and doing poses for Instagram, dancing, jumping, doing handstands. People are freaking stupid.
Meow Time
cucumbers GIFGiphyCats videos. I agree that cats are funny, but when it's the most popular thing on the internet, it makes me think that people aren't interested in self-development.
How?
Wikihow.
Yeah the majority of wikiHow articles are useful, but every now and then there's one that's hilariously dumb.
Comedy gold a while ago, just from a wikihow.
pop furniture GIFDear Prep H....
Certain Warning labels....
"Dear Preparation H, I love your product and it has made me feel so much better; but boy does it taste bad!"
We is Dumb
Math: we're literally incapable of the kind of information processing and abstraction needed to deal with things directly. So, we came up with systems of symbols and rules for manipulating them that allow us to sidestep our cognitive limitations. Also, the lottery (unless it's a charity lottery or something).
How Free?
Bags of nuts, vegetables, meat, etc. that say "gluten free."
Those labels can be pretty helpful for people with severe allergies. The "gluten free" labels typically indicate that the product hasn't come in contact with any gluten products at any point during processing, such as on shared machinery. It doesn't matter for most of us, but guarantees can be important for people who can't tolerate even trace amounts of gluten.
Everything & Everyone....
Climate Change
Jersey Shore
Kanye West's presidential campaign
The modern day Flat Earth movement (even the ancient Greeks knew it was round bro)
You (the person reading this not OP), I've met your mom.
Issues with Shade
Racism, not just for the whole BLM, it is known that genetic diversity is the key for species survival, and we are looking waaaay too much at what shade of black, Brown or white a person has.
Also, "race" is one of those things that people won't give importance until some one mentions it.
In the books....
diva read GIFGiphyFrom the biblical perspective, clothing.
Protip: if a snake starts to talk to you, you probably shouldn't eat the food it suggests you eat.
to inflame
The word flammable.
The original word was inflammable, from the word inflame. But people thought it meant non-flammable. So the word flammable was created.
It's a good word because it keeps innocent children from being burnt because of their dumb parents.
System Shock
electrocuted home alone 2 lost in new york GIFGiphyThe charge of an electron. Benjamin Franklin had a 50/50 chance and he guessed wrong. This has made teaching electronics harder to do for the rest of eternity.
Scientific Understanding is Only Half the Battle
"Measles. In the 2000's, measles was nearly eradicated. However, because of antivaxxers communities, it went on a rise again. In the same vein, wear a goddamn mask people."
"I should also mention measles was always very prevalent in other nations, so I'm just referring to the US in this comment."
Because Yes, Someone Has Tried That
"warning labels" -- Ocean_Beast
"This was exactly what I came to comment. My most favorite warning label was on a baby stroller. 'Remove child before folding!'" -- kaismama
"I found this on a hair dryer: 'Do not use while sleeping'" -- MEScout
"My fav warning label was my coffee maker saying 'do not hold above peoples head'" -- twolimbooctopus
Drop Cloth
GiphyFood Bibs, Not all of us can be like Hannibal Burress and have the confidence to not drop or spill our food on the way to our mouths.
Debatable
"Lawyers. Source: am lawyer." -- fendaar
"Even without dumb people I think we'd still need some lawyers to handle things like contract law or patent law." -- adeon
"Oh really? Name every law" -- Darkmaster666666
1 Foot Doughnut Claims
"NOT REAL SIZE Logos on posters."
"I used to work in a grocery store that had a bakery, and we had a poster that was hanging from the ceiling with the bakery's logo and a few pastries beside it."
"We had to reprint the poster with a message under it that said, 'Not real life size' because some Karen got mad then when she got her donut and it wasn't 1 ft. in diameter."
"She complained for 'False advertising' and corporate had to send a new poster."
-- jman857
Unnatural Phenomena
"Pugs" -- Lil-Sleepy-A1
"Have you ever seen the skeleton of one of those monstrosities?" -- zookeeper4980
"If you keep a pug in good shape, it will breathe easier" -- maxipad2008
In Case You Had Other Interpretations
"The label on milk bottles that says it contains dairy. If I'm buying milk I'd kinda hope it contains dairy?" -- thebibarista
"Allergy info: This peanut butter contains peanut products. Gee thanks" -- Heel-Hook
"Disclaimer before UFC fight: this may include violence. Well yeah it better f***in contain violence, that's what I'm here for" -- ZoFarZoGood
A Momentous AccidentÂ
"Penicillin, because someone didn't clean the Petri dish" -- drempire
"Worked out though" -- Heel-Hook
"Or a cantaloupe" -- naivemetaphysics
It Doesn’t Have to Be This Way
"The [virus] death toll in the US" -- Snow_Da_92
"How is the US media reporting the country's response for [virus]" -- Heel-Hook
"Pretty much like you'd expect. The left says everyone's stupid for not wearing masks, the right says everyone's stupid for wearing masks...."
"It's a sh** show....." -- Snow_Da_92
Who Was The Last to Leave?
"Africanized honey bees, a.k.a. killer bees."
"Some scientist accidentally let out bees and now they have the intent to kill anything in site. Worse than wasps my opinion."
-- Cheese_Boi20
Buying Power
"In the call center I work at part of our greeting is that we have to thank customers for the number of years they've been with the company because we legit had people complain about us not doing that."
The Most Ridiculous Things Someone Said With A Totally Straight Face
Reddit user ButterflyOverkill asked: 'What's the most ridiculous thing you've heard someone say that they were 100% serious about?'
We've all heard someone say something totally inaccurate and thought to ourselves, "What?"
But the really troubling incidences are when the person speaking clearly believes what they're saying and they make the misinformed comment with a totally straight face.
Redditor ButterflyOverkill asked:
Swimming with Tsunamis
"My brother, against all laws of known physics, is absolutely certain that if he was ever in a tsunami he could just 'swim under it.'"
"We've both been in the ocean plenty of times, surfed a bit, and have definitely had our share of waves wreck our sh*t, but he's still certain he could do it if he got the timing right."
- Magic_Man_Boobs
Accent-Based Geography
"The Caribbean coast is off the coast of England because they have British accents in 'Pirates of The Caribbean.'"
"This man was in the military and had no knowledge of geography."
- Aware_Statement_205
"Man, the Death Star must have been built in England, too."
- Faust_8
The Earth is Flat
"My co-worker. We were all having a conversation. I don't remember what we were talking about, but I said something to the extent of, 'Crazy, it's like someone thinking the earth is flat.'"
"His response was, 'Well, it is.'"
"My other co-worker and I looked at each other, confused."
"Our Flat-Earth co-worker continued explaining why the earth is flat. He was saying it like he was stating facts."
"We're engineers for crying out loud. You paid too much money for your glasses and degree to see things this way!"
- Boyblack
"One of my good friends I had once respected went down this route. He effectively said because he hadn't seen the earth from space, he doesn't believe it's round. He believes nothing he hasn't seen himself."
"I proceeded to show him the red bull guy literally land on Earth from space, and it was round, but he still didn't believe it because it wasn't him."
"He also couldn't explain why nobody had ever fallen off the edge of our flat earth since if it is flat; it clearly has to end somewhere. He just said, 'I don't know. I just know it isn't round.'"
"I thought I would lose my f**king mind."
- QuaintHeadspace
"Has he seen his BRAIN?"
- dpet_77
That's not how this works
"My cousin was not the sharpest tool in the shed. He was convinced he could have unprotected sex with any woman because his current girlfriend was pregnant, so there was no risk he could get another girl pregnant…"
- joeyboii23
Drive to Hawaii
"A nurse I used to work with asked why we can't drive to Hawaii. She was absolutely serious and I wasn't surprised when she didn't last beyond her training period."
- Veritaserum25
Hawaii's Neighbor, Alaska
"I was asked, 'Why is Alaska so cold but Hawaii is warm when they're right next to each other?' because on US maps, they're always both in a little cutaway box down by Mexico."
- Msktb
Misunderstood Roundabouts
"Putting in a roundabout was stupid because now they had to stop four times instead of the one time if they had just left it as a four-way-stop."
- SaraSmashley
"We recently got a few in my town. People treat them like stop signs and come to a (somewhat) complete stop before entering."
"If it’s clear, I just breeze through without stopping like you’re supposed to. I’ve had passengers tell me I ran the stop sign. It’s a yield sign."
- caseyjosephine
The Caribbean Moon
"That when we were in the Caribbean we were seeing a different moon. Their moon."
- robkat22
"I’m living in the Caribbean and went out to look at the moon after reading this. It’s such a clever duplicate, I never would have known."
- inconsistencyItself
No Accountability
"My ex-husband was a horrible driver. Wrecked everything he ever owned and then some, but he somehow thought he was an excellent driver."
"We were riding through a town with a four-lane main road. He started to change lanes oblivious to the car that was located exactly where he was headed. I told him to stay in his lane, and fortunately, he did."
"He said, 100 percent seriously, that if he'd changed lanes and crashed into the car that was already there, it would have been their fault because they didn't honk their horn to warn him."
- sirdigbykittencaesar
"This reminds me of an old joke:"
"A man is driving to work when his phone starts ringing. It's his wife."
"She says, 'Be careful darling, the news has just said there's a maniac driving the wrong way down the road.'"
"The man replies, 'Not just one maniac, f**king hundreds of them!'"
- Mackem101
The Sun and the Moon
"'Why do they call one side of the Sun the Moon?'"
"This 30-year-old legitimately thought the moon was just the other side of the sun."
- JoisChaoticWhatever
Seatbelt Safety
"'I never wear a seatbelt.'"
"And why the h**l not?"
"'Because if I am in a wreck, there’s no way I’d be thrown to safety.'"
- BreatheMy
"I had a friend with a similar theory. She didn’t wear them because she had heard stories of people wearing seatbelts ending up with serious head injuries in car accidents."
"She honestly couldn’t grasp what the results would be without them."
- ghjkl098
Scary Orb in the Sky
"Former 911 dispatcher here. I had a guy call once freaking out about the white orb thing in the sky."
"The moon. He was very worried."
"I made him promise not to drive or leave his house. I told him to call back if he felt sick, but we never heard from him again."
"I wonder if there’s a dude out there who remembers that time he got [baked] and called 911 because of the moon."
- Here4TheShinyThings
Bluetooth Shower Head
"She was very serious that she wanted a useable hand-held shower head without a hose because the hose was 'ugly.'"
"I asked if she meant an overhead or a wall-mounted shower head because those didn’t require a hose."
"Nope. She wanted the water to flow from the wall into a handheld shower head without a hose."
"I tried to tell her that wasn’t possible and ended up sending her to a different home improvement store."
- Lone_Ronin_
"She wanted the wireless version."
- thatvixenivy
Those Darn 5G Headaches
"My wife’s grandmother was complaining once how her phone’s 5G was giving her headaches and asked my wife to turn off the 5G."
"My wife works with phones and was easily able to tell her grandmother that her phone wasn’t even capable of 5G."
"Her grandmother didn’t like that answer and later took her phone into her carrier to only be told the same thing."
- croyalbird13
Trapped in "The Oregon Trail"
"I'm 43 now but used to do a fair bit of traveling in my younger days, up until I was about 30. I always came back home for Thanksgiving and Christmas."
"Anyway, I had hitch-hiked back into town and was walking to my Grandma's house where I'd be staying, carrying my Alice pack."
"A girl got to talking with me on my way, and it came up that I'd just got back from Oregon."
"Dead-faced confused, she was like, 'They have towns out there, like cities and stuff?'"
"She genuinely believed it was still like the Oregon Trail days... except this was in 2005, lol (laughing out loud)."
- lightsaber_lobotomy
"People on travel forums sometimes ask if the roads in Arizona are paved, especially the road to the Grand Canyon."
"I always want to reply, 'No. You need to rent a covered wagon.'"
- mesembryanthemum
We've all been misinformed about something at some point, but these accounts were very surprising.
It's tough decide if these instances would be worth talking about, to help the person know better next time, or if it's just better to smile and nod.