"Teachers of reddit, what is the craziest reason you have had to send a student to the office?"
Must Have Been One Epic Backpack...
"I’m a middle school teacher."
"I had a student sneak a gas cooker and his moms pork chops into school in a large backpack."
"He cooked pork chops for his friends at lunchtime, he was sent to the office for unsafe behavior, his mom was PISSED he took her pork chops she was preparing for dinner."- swanathonjon
At Least She Wasn't Faking It...
"I didn't send the student; she was from another room, but this really happened where I taught over 25 years ago."
"A girl was sick and the office phone was handed to her to tell her parents to come and get her."
"At least she was honest...because she puked right onto the phone, and it zapped the entire school's PA system somehow."
"This was using, of course, a land line."
"I can't tell you why the secretary didn't just do the talking for her."
"This was in around 1997, and I'm assuming the phone was even older than that, could've been from the '80s."
"The phone was a push-button model, so probably not older than that."
"You used that phone to access the PA, so I'm guessing the stomach acid fried some wires in there."
"Yuck!!"
"My room was across the hall from the office, and yes, we could definitely smell the vomit."
"Couldn't close the door fast enough."- 1989DiscGolfer
張敬軒 Vomit GIFGiphySo, So, Gross...
"A grade 1 student came up to me on the playground telling me another student was making her sick."
"She pointed to another student about 10 metres away, looked at me, and projectile puked on the blacktop."
"Went to the other student."
"He had found rabbit turds on the ground and stuck them in his mouth and was chasing kids around."
"I then puked."
"I didn't go to the office."
"But rabbit turd kid did."- mollymuppet78
Who Knew Teachers Had To Put Up With So Much Vomit?
"A student repeatedly getting on tables and singing Gucci Gang in the middle of class."
"Every. Day. For. Weeks."
"I have since left the profession."- CorieMcP
How Did He Even Get It?
"Kid was selling drugs."
"13 yrs old."
"Cops were involved."
"Had to go to court."
"Was a massive headache all around."- James_Is_Raging
One At Least Hopes She Cooked It?
"When my sister was a substitute teacher a kid ate the dead class fish."
"It was Monday so it might’ve been dead all weekend."- natsugrayerza
Adam Devine Bad Ideas GIF by The Roku ChannelGiphyOne Way Of Handling It...
"A new male student, year 4, gets mistaken by his classmates for being female (he had long shiny hair)."
"I’m guessing this wasn’t the first time this has happened, as he immediately jumped to the top of his desk, pulled out his junk, waved them out to everyone, yelling, ‘what the f*ck is this! I’m a boy, I’m a boy!'."- joelwhite313
Oh, The Innocence Of Children...
"A kid handed me a whole string of condoms in front of the class the day before spring break bc I was getting married over spring break."- m0992104
People Need To Think About Their Lies More Carefully
"It was the second day of my first year teaching (5th grade)."
"A student refused to do a writing assignment because she said she forgot how to write in English."
"When I asked what language she knew how to write in, she said, 'I only know Japanese'."
"Listen, it is plausible a student at my school would be proficient in writing in Japanese."
"HOWEVER, I had already seen her files."
"The likelihood that she knew was fluent in Japanese was a bit far-fetched."
"She eventually told me she also speaks Japanese, so I called her out by asking her to say, 'I don't want to come to school today' using her newfound foreign language skills."
"This 11 year old LITERALLY responded with, 'Ching chang chong!'"
"I sent her to the dean's office for refusing to work and man, OH MAN, did it work out perfectly."
"She sat down with the dean who tried to pry more information from this student."
"Only for the dean to explain to the student she herself is half Japanese and attended school in Japan."
"I wish I could have been a fly on the wall when the student heard the dean speaking ACTUAL Japanese to test the students' knowledge of the language."
"The student eventually said she only knew a few Japanese words, which devolved into her admitting the entire story was a lie to get out of doing an assignment."
"On the second day of school."
"And lies like this went on allllllllllll year long."
"So many hilarious, yet equally sad, stories from that year that I still laugh at eight years later."- 8MCM1
Schitts Creek What GIF by CBCGiphyGoing To The Principal's Office Isn't Always A Bad Thing...
"Not a teacher, but my dad was a bus driver, and one day, this kid gets on the bus, sprinting, and nearly knocks himself out on the chair."
"When my dad goes over to see what's happened, he realizes the kid had no pants on."
"The mother, who drove off in her car extremely quickly, had literally sent this poor kid to school with no pants on."
"My dad got a student he knew really well to sit next to this kid and comfort him, and also make sure everyone else wasn't a**holes."
"My dad, when he finally got to the school, walked this kid into the office and asked for a spare pair of pants."
"Poor kid."
"That mother was an a**hole."- bananaboy65
6th Grade?!
"We were doing sketch comedy in 6th grade a few years back and seeing as it was a nice day we went outside to practice."
"From across the field I see one of my students very clearly and aggressively trying to put his junk on a prone classmate."
"When I asked him, he said it was for his sketch and he was playing a character named 'the iron teabag'."
"The best was the follow up text from my boss saying 'I had to Google what teabagging was before I met with the kid'."- Beirsed1985
Misguided Chivalry
"Kid shows up to class 10-15 minutes late to a 40-minute period."
"7th grade."
"Shawn: 'Sorry Ms. G I was in a bad mood and I didn’t want to bring it to class'.”
"Me: 'Hi Shawn, I will still have to count you tardy. You’re extremely late and I need to know where you are for safety reasons. In the future there’s a counselor request form on my GoogleClassroom page you can fill out'.”
"Shawn: 'Okay thanks'."
"Things went normally for about 10 minutes, until another student shot a rubber band."
"It didn’t hit anyone but Shawn decided to take justice into his own hands."
"In the middle of me giving instruction he gets up, walks slowly across the room (I assumed for a tissue) and smacks the other student across the face."- Pretend_Dog_2253
In truth, being sent to the principal's office is fairly easily avoided.
So much so, that in some of these cases, one almost wants to give them props for creativity.
While the controversial topic is justifiably subject to condemnation, the show delicately depicted each characters' emotional turmoil and their families in the aftermath.
While many in these types of forbidden relationships don't end well, Redditor Sadebiru was curious to hear from those familiar with the situation and asked:
"[Serious] Redditors who slept with their teachers, what was the fallout after it happened?"
Consequences
These Redditors faced immediate disciplinary consequences for their involvement in their respective intimacies, but one suffered emotional trauma for years.
The Trauma Of Being Used
"My English teacher used me as a sperm donor. She slept with me until she got pregnant and then stopped. She didn't even bother to switch schools so I wouldn't know. This was about 50 years ago and it still crosses my mind and bothers me. So the fallout on my side was being mentally messed up for about 4 years and not being able to have a normal sexual relationship for a long time."
– readit2U
Predatory Soccer Coach
"I had a very inappropriate relationship with the assistant soccer coach. His contract was not renewed the next year and I was the subject of gossip, obviously, and labeled the school sl*t by my classmates. It was a very small private school so there was literally no way to keep anything secret. It was only later on I realized he'd taken advantage of me and was, obviously, a sicko who knew I'd fall for the flattery of an older guy the rest of the girls on the team thought was cute."
Sleeping With The P.E. Teacher
"My cousin Adrian slept with the physical education teacher. It was in the mid 1980s, and it right near the end of the school year. She was immediately transferred and he lost his school reference and was suspended for the remainder of the year, which was like four weeks from memory."
"he was no angel. He was an absolute player and he said he has no ill feelings about the whole thing at all. It didn't affect his schooling any further after that and he said he absolutely seduced her, it wasn't the other way around."
Left "Morally Conflicted" About Taking Action
"It was horrible. I was groomed by my English teacher. He said all the right things and I thought I was emotionally mature enough to handle it. I was not."
"I realized when I was 19 how messed up it was and very quietly told the bishop and the Victims of Sexual Misconduct Councilor (catholic school). My worst fear was that it was going to be a big public scandal and I didn't want my family's name dragged through the mud. So he permanently lost his teaching license."
"He is now dating a woman and I want to reach out to her so bad to her to ask if she knows, but at the same time I want that chapter of my life to end. I'm very morally conflicted."
– DeezMags
Secret Liason
"I had a little intercourse with the replacement French teacher after class, first gay time for him, never did it again. He spent the rest of the year looking at everyone but me in class and dodging every occasion to interact with me, definitively out of shame. But idk if it's because he slept with a student, had gay sex or did it in the classroom we were in atm."
Perspective
"Towards the end of the 70's, I was in a boarding school, and a student in a class above mine slept with one of the kindergarten teachers. He must have been about 16, she in her twenties. Since he was in his final year, he passed out, and from what I last heard, he was doing well in life. She on the other hand was not allowed back to school."
No Fallout
Instead of suffering a fallout per se, the following Redditors reflected on their flirtatious entanglements.
Creepy But Without Incident
"There were no real ramifications."
"In high school I was in a unique study program. Because I was smart enough to do the schoolwork on my own but didn't bother attending class, they let me do all my work at home and I only had to go in once a week to take tests. This let me work more, not have to figure out how to get to school, get As, and learn more. I was being moved around a lot, so for a while I had to do this program at a different school."
"I had to meet with the teacher privately in his office for about an hour. Of course he was a creepy old man so after months of him hitting on me eventually we ended up meeting up one day to screw. I was in the program because I didn't go to school, so while I did my schoolwork I missed the next couple weeks and so he showed up at my work panicked over my lack of attendance. Since he probably got scared over that and the potential ramifications he didn't hit on me anymore afterwards and eventually I moved again and went to a different school."
– AlishaV
Heart Break
"I had a long affair with a college professor. He broke my heart, of course. After about 15 years. I don't think anyone knew except maybe a couple of my friends who never said anything. I was older than my classmates, so it wasn't so bad. Til it was, but that was years later, after I graduated."
Consenting Adults
"Nothing since I was 6 years out of high school by that point."
"We became friends a couple years after I graduated, eventually I told her I had something of a crush on her, she thought it was cute and flattering and sat on it for a while. One day she invites me out and we meet up, have a good time, we leave. Later that night she texts me when I'm work says she's got feelings too and wants to pursue it."
"We go on a couple more dates, see a movie (The Watch for those wondering), make out in her car afterwards like a couple horny teenagers. We do the deed that night, good times."
"Anyway, the age gap was something she couldn't get over, I was 25 and she was 48, different places in our lives with different goals. We still chat though."
The Chinese Teacher
"She was my Chinese teacher at a Confucius Institute, and is almost 10 years older than me, but I always had a minor crush on her."
"When her contract was about to expire and had to leave my country, we went out to dinner. She was leaving for one last trip before returning to China, so this would be the last time I would see her. I decided to take a shot and told her about my crush. We slept together that night."
"There wasn't really a fallout. We are still in contact, but don't really talk about that night."
One And Done
"Gay dude here. It wasn't my teacher, but just a professor at my school. He contacted me via an app. I was feeling desperate, so I invited him over. Did the deed. He messaged a few days later, asking for another session, but I politely declined. Same thing happened a few days later. He took the hint, and I never heard from him again."
Good Memory
The following academic flings were either highly erotic or wound up being blissful.
"Too Riskey To Continue"
"A few people found out and gave me sh*t about it, but really not a big deal for me personally. It was obviously more difficult for her. Rumours got back to other teachers who were not cool with it and she had some awkward conversations to navigate with the headteacher. She admitted we saw each other outside of school but denied anything sexual, which they did not seem to believe. She was told never to be alone with me and had restrictions placed on her ability to act as a chaperone on school trips etc."
"It didn't last as it was obvious it was too risky to continue but there was no bad feeling between us."
The French Teacher
"I slept with my French teacher about 5 years after leaving school, she was just as as I'd always imagined."
"Afternoon Office Nookie"
"It was in college, we slept together before we knew I was in her class. It was one of those lecture only classes with like 200 students in it so it wasn't a big deal."
"No fallout beyond some late afternoon office hook up now and then."
"She would text me pictures of what she was wearing under her outfit that day. I miss being young."
"The Best Thing That Ever Happened"
"I started dating the grad student that was teaching one of my undergrad classes, although because I took time off before going to uni and he started early I was actually older than him."
"The uni had rules against the sort of thing, of course. We weren't found out until the spring quarter, at which time we were told to cease and desist, but by the time this happened we were engaged."
"The administration were happy for us (and we were all friends there, the department was like one big family), so instead they told us that for the rest of the year my exams and juries would have to be handled by another professor and that our class sessions would be recorded to be sure there was no funny business or nepotism."
"20 years on, we're still married - it was the best thing that ever happened to either of us!"
In rare cases, some students have glorified their dalliances with teachers and bragged about their conquests among their peers.
Some – as those participating in this thread – expressed the absence of fallout or lack of emotional trauma.
The usual suspects are the chatty pupils, and the class clown, always looking to amuse their fellow classmates. Usually, these obnoxious behaviors from students can be stopped with a warning.
But when objects are involved in disruption and the teacher physically has to walk down the aisle to retrieve something that has been thrown or that stole focus, that's just asking for detention or a trip to the principal's office.
Curious to hear about the experiences of teachers on the internet, Redditor SpoonSArmy asked:
"Teachers, what's the weirdest thing you've had to take away from a student?"
Matters Of Food
Most students cannot wait for the lunch bell, so they'll manifest lunchtime by sneaking in a snack during class, only to have them ripped from their hands.
One student, however, was genuinely terrified about a food item he had in his locker room.
Something's Afoul
"It was December or January and we were having one of those 'lockdowns' where the police come in with dogs to sniff for drugs. We were all locked in our classrooms and no students were allowed out, even to visit the restroom. One of my students was white as a ghost, very afraid. I asked him what's the matter, but it was obvious he was afraid he was about to get busted. He said 'Do you think the dogs will go to my locker?' I said 'I don't know, do you have something to be worried about?' He said 'There's a ham and cheese sandwich in there.' I scratched my head a bit, 'I'm sure it's no problem to have a sandwich.' He said, 'Yeah, but it's been in there since September.'"
Shakespear-ian Snack
"Instant pudding. My student was mixing it in a large Cool Whip container, using milk from lunch, right in the middle of a lesson on Macbeth."
"They were making their own witch's brew."
Wrong Juice, Shelby
"A wine cooler that looked like a Capri Sun. This was a 2nd grader and she was just getting ready to drink it."
End To Torment
No teacher appreciates being interrupted during a lesson, especially when the disruption is an aggressive one.
These teachers had to put a stop to violence in the classroom by removing "weapons."
The Orb Of Death
"Eyeballs. I worked with a blind student with autism. When he would get angry, he would pop out his glass eyeballs and throw them across the room. They were expensive, so mom asked that we put them in a plastic bag in his backpack if he threw them.... no more eyeballs for you today! 🙈"
Attempted Allergy Attack
"First thing that came to mind - a drawing of a peanut. One kid said he had a peanut allergy, so a boy drew a peanut on a piece of paper, and started shoving it in the other boy's face and being a general jerk with it."
Decking The Halls, And Each Other
Christmas ornaments. They were throwing them at each other and it eventually caused a fight.
Next to that would be a curtain rod. He found it and kept hitting people with it."
When Enough Is Enough
Some items taken away involved more than one object at one time, starting with the contents of these contemptible gadgets.
Making Noise
"Not a teacher, but was part of almost eliminating the 'prize' box in my kids class."
"Kid is in kindergarten. I'm freinds with a few of the other fathers in her class. One of the things her class has is a prize box. If the kids are all on their game for the week, or a kid does something especially good, they get to choose something from the box. Its filled with the kind of stuff you would find in a blister pack in the dollar store. Stuff like a little plastic car, or a bouncey ball or whatever. Anyway, the kids love it, the parents supply stuff for it."
"So one day my kid comes home with a f'king kazoo from the thing. Nothing like a 6 year old who just figured out how a kazoo works while you are trying to work from home."
"So immediately i fire off an email to the list of my fellow dads asking what wisea** put kazoos in the prize box, and then see that 2 other people had beat me to the question."
"One of the guys finally replies back 'heh'"
"and it was on. I countered with whistles, someone else had this annoying popping thing, someone else got the worlds worst balsa planes, so like, the second time it flew it was destined to snap in half and upset your kid....this went on for like a good 2 weeks before someone crossed the line and sent in glitter."
"By this point the teacher was on to us, and told our wives on us."
Something's A Buzz
"An entire menagerie of live insects. One afternoon my class decided that they should see how many bugs they could capture and keep alive in my classroom. The next day, I returned from covering lunch duty in another part of the school and noticed that one of the cubbies had paper towel taped over the front like a curtain. Before I could investigate, I noticed several Tupperware containers hiding in desks."
"Dozens of worms (that was the cubby) Many assorted beetles Uncounted ants 4 bees A wasp And, most upsetting, several flies which were crazy glued to index cards and had their wings removed."
"That was a long day in a long year."
So Here's The Scoop(s)
"a girl had about 50 plastic spoons in her pocket, she tripped and tey all fell out, we all found it hilarious but a high up teacher was walking by and made her pick them up (she was going to anyway) and put them all in the bin
he was probably very confused over the whole situation."
My Experience
I had something taken away from me while I was in eighth grade during English class for reasons that still leaves me with questions.
It was a book written by the master of horror, Stephen King, called The Tommyknockers. I had it out on my desk and as soon as my teacher saw it, and she took it away and told me it was inappropriate for me to read.
How did she know? Did she read it? Or was it because Stephen King uses lewd language in all his novels? Or was she just punishing me because I was annoying and talkative in class? Full disclosure, it was because of the latter.
Sometimes, the mischievous ones are just asking for it. So students, always just pay attention and respect your teachers, m'kay?
