self love

Top Stories
People Divulge What's Truly Holding Them Back From Loving Themselves
Tyler Nix on Unsplash

When it comes to succeeding in life, one of the most important qualities to possess is confidence. It sounds simple, but most of us can attest that it's not.

You can't be a confident person unless you love yourself. That may sound egotistical, but it's not. Self love is different from arrogance. Self love is all about accepting yourself as you are and being proud of who you are.

That's not to say you should be proud if you're not a decent person, but if you are trying your best, there's no reason not to love yourself. However, it's hard for a lot of us to love ourselves. Some of us find it even harder to do than others.

Keep reading... Show less

People Share One Thing They Actually Love About Themselves

[rebelmouse-image 18356079 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Though we live in a largely self-deprecating society, we should always keep an eye on what we love about ourselves.

Self love can manifest in a number of different ways: from the way we treat ourselves on a day-to-day basis, to the way we go about conversation with our peers and our elders. If you're always focusing on self-deprecation, that comes through just as powerfully.

Reddit user Common_Communist decided to make the internet focus on what they love about themselves by asking:

What do you love about yourself?

Here are some of the lovely answers.

The Little Engine That Could

[rebelmouse-image 18356080 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I am insanely mediocre in pretty much everything but that never stopped me from achieving what I want.

Inclusion

[rebelmouse-image 18356081 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My social awareness to pick up on when someone is feeling left out of an activity or just feeling down, whether it be in a social setting or at work, and actively including them in the conversation or whatever we're doing.

Objectivity

[rebelmouse-image 18356083 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Just my ability to keep a cool head about stressful things. I'm always able to step back, look at myself in 3rd person, and figure out the next steps to get out of a problem.

Initiative

[rebelmouse-image 18356084 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My ability to figure stuff out. If I need to fix something, I will research it and work on it and see how to do it rather than letting it stay broken or paying someone else to fix it. It is fun for me.

Learning From Life

[rebelmouse-image 18356086 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I love the level of confidence that I now have and took 30+ years for me to develop. As a child who was bullied mercilessly all the way through high school (including daily physical and mental violence), having my first girlfriend be physically and emotionally abusive and ended with her cheating on me, and being completely inept at making friends; I have every reason to be a complete mess of a human being... but I'm not. I took steps in my mid to late 20s to improve myself as a person and every little thing I did added to my level of confidence to the point where I would now consider myself a successful person (married, own a house, and have a decent paying job) and I'm excited about my future prospects. I'm at the point now where people who know me are truly shocked about some of the things I went through growing up and on occasion don't even believe me when I tell some of the darker stories.

Self-Love Through Love For Others

[rebelmouse-image 18356087 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I'm very selfless. I know this sounds weird since I'm saying it about myself, but I always look out for others and do what I can to help anyone before myself. My wife says it's my best quality.

An Unexpected Love

[rebelmouse-image 18356088 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My grey hair.

If you'd have asked me 20/25 years ago if I'd be happy to go grey I would have said "No" without even thinking about it. Now, I love it.

Musicality

[rebelmouse-image 18356089 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

It's kinda weird but I can learn instruments really really fast. It's pretty great.

Just Chill, Man

[rebelmouse-image 18356090 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My ability to go with the flow. Basically my 'don't care' attitude. Really helps me enjoy life more and without the stress most people feel.

Creativity

[rebelmouse-image 18349596 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I'm a pretty good writer, and I've worked hard to get to a point where I've been writing fiction as my sole source of income for over half a decade now.

It's a numbers game, and you need to write to market. Those are the two big things. I self-publish romance on Amazon, and it does me OK: there's a built in readership who go through books like water, and they're actively out there looking for your work. There are people out there reading two or three novels a week, and that's all money in your pocket. You just need to make sure that you're filling their demand, and someone who likes your work my very well go through and buy every book in a series. Don't treat the audience like rubes, though. Just because it's a pretty formulaic genre, it doesn't mean you can phone it in. They expect a good story, and good editing, and a well-designed cover.

Ultimately, the more high-quality and audience-focused work you put out, the better you'll do. Good luck.

Doggone It

[rebelmouse-image 18353008 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.

Digging Yourself Out

[rebelmouse-image 18356091 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I stopped my depression, suicide and reprogrammed my mind. Figured out the source of it all... I figured a way out.

Daddy Non-Issues

[rebelmouse-image 18356092 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

How good of a Dad I am. It's not often I brag, as it's actually a pet peeve of mine, but I'm a great husband and father. Especially when I see how most dads are...eeesh.

Grateful, Grateful

[rebelmouse-image 18356093 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

How lucky I am to have such nice things and such great people in my life. I've been told I'm likeable but I don't entirely believe that.

Trying To Understand

[rebelmouse-image 18356094 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My ability to empathize and rationally discuses the root of a problem, rather than start name-calling and pointing fingers. It's an all too easy road to take when having a disagreement with someone, but I'm very proud of myself for trying to remain calm in these situations.

Eyez

[rebelmouse-image 18356095 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I have really nice eyes that are blue and gold coloured.

Sharp-Tongued

[rebelmouse-image 18356096 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My wit.

I know it sounds arrogant to say "I'm pretty funny" but when I say wit, it's more in a way that gets people comfortable.

I can almost always come up with quick, amusing responses off the cuff, and around new people, that tends to take away most awkward tension.

I always told my fiance that if I could only keep one character trait, it would be that, because there is hardly ever a social situation where it isn't useful to some degree.

All The Small Things

[rebelmouse-image 18356097 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

That I finally learned to stop giving a f*ck about the small things, especially the opinions of other people whom I don't really value.

It really has reduced my anxiety, improved my self-confidence, and makes me feel much more comfortable living life on my own terms. Quit caring so much about what other people think about how you live!

Passion

[rebelmouse-image 18345108 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I love the fact that even as an adult, I still have a fascination with the natural world to the point in which I am pursuing a PhD. I guess that passion that I had when I was a kid never really faded away.

I also think that I have nice eyes :-)

Depression Interrupted

[rebelmouse-image 18354291 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I'm someone who lives with what had been crippling depression. I still have the brain chemistry of a depressed person but I can honestly say I'm a genuinely happy person.

I have a lot of work I have to do to be happy, including keeping track of my energy and constantly talking things out with my wife because the chemicals in my brain want me to go into a crazy downward spiral where I reject reality and fold myself in on my own dark concoction of depressed skewed views.

Years of therapy. Daily pep talks to myself. Daily evaluation of my life to show myself what I have to be happy about, and a lot of writing out intrusive thoughts so they don't bounce around in my brain until I believe them.

I'm genuinely happy. I smile all the time and there's so much to laugh about. I'm glad I can say that even through it's sometimes challenging to accept that it's okay to be happy.

Intuition

[rebelmouse-image 18349700 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My ability to just KNOW when something is wrong, especially relating to people. I'm great at psychology and behavioural studies, and while I know not to shove 7 billion+ people under the same umbrella, I'm good at noticing the small details about a person: their eye movements, what they do with their hands, how shaky or smooth their voice sounds, their appearance, etc. I usually don't judge them on that either, I just keep it at the back of my mind for next time when I see them, to see if they do/have the same traits.

So far, I've only been wrong about one single person in relation to how dangerous or mentally stable they are. That one person, a psychopath, was so good at hiding his issues, that the only thing I caught on with was that he didn't really ever talk to me - which I shrugged off, seeing as he was my sister's bf and they barely ever visited.

Gen X-cellent

[rebelmouse-image 18356098 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

My willingness to evolve with the times.

Even though I've officially hit 'get off my lawn' age, I refuse to even spring for a place with a lawn. Yards are a waste on resources, even though my generation considers them aspirational.

Planners

[rebelmouse-image 18356099 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I'm pretty good at figuring out a plan when sh*t goes haywire. My boyfriend is and ex-boyfriend was horrible at handling things when something goes wrong. I've always been the one to go, "Okay, well this is the problem, THESE are our options to deal with it. Let's figure it out." I don't waste time wallowing in what could have been and what went wrong. Helps that I'm optimistic while still being realistic.

Owning Thyself

[rebelmouse-image 18356100 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I'm a really good illustrator, writer and singer. I'm also pretty funny.

It's taken me a long time to build up the self confidence to say those things up front, rather than dancing around self deprecation as a stand-in for humility.

I love that, too.