"What's your biggest red flag in a partner?"
The Wisest Admit When They've Made A Mistake...
"Inability to recognize or admit when they've made a mistake."- UniversityEastern542
My Way Or The Highway...
"Using ultimatums to get their way instead of compromising."- Whed1956
And That Concerns Me, Why?...
"No respect for your interests or your time."- ElNakedo·
Bored Over It GIFGiphyIt's Can Be Easy To See Clearly Through The "Gaslight"...
"Manipulation on any level."- xfalinex
"Manipulating, gaslighting, 'winning'."- umbrex
Is It Really So Difficult To Say "I'm Sorry"?...
"Inability to apologize."- theregoesthevillage
Sorry Taylor Swift GIFGiphyHonesty is ALWAYS The Best Policy...
"My biggest red flag in a partner would be their inability to communicate effectively and be honest with me."
"Trust is key."- Proper_Ad5123
What You See Is What You Get
"Wanting to change my style and look."
"First girlfriend wanted me to wear button up shirts, colored my hair brown, and even wanted me to wear brown colored contact lenses."
"Coincidentally these were all features of her cousin who she later married."
"A good partner helps you grow and become the best version of you."
"They don't try to mould you into their own vision."- AdmiralClover
Alicia Silverstone Makeover GIF by filmeditorWritten In The Stars
"Blames their sh*tty behaviour on their star sign."
"Yeah, I ain't buying the 'it's because I'm a Scorpio" bullsh*t."- A_Direwolf
...Or Maybe A Scratched Cornea?
"An eyepatch. It's a sign of dangerous living, possibly pirate or rustler but certainly an outlaw."- beathelas
Temper Temper...
"Can't control their anger and/or hits and breaks stuff when angry."- LilleSmurfine
There Is Nothing More Important In Life...
"Your significant other restricting you from hanging out with your friends."- AagamAaghnya
There Is So Much More To Life...
"If their political views are their whole personality."- V1p3rzach
brooklyn nine nine politics GIFGiphyIt's fair enough to have deal breakers when it comes to finding a partner.
Always remember though, first impressions can be misleading.
And love has a way of helping you overlook the imperfections of others.
Redditor halcyon_n_on_n_on wanted to hear all the things everyone's partners have said that left them confused. So they asked everyone:
"What’s the dumbest thing your significant other has said or done?"
My exes are all dumb. But at least they made me laugh.
‘Ajar’
Clint Eastwood Hello GIF by GritTVGiphy"We bought a new car. She asked me if I changed the settings to Spanish because it said ‘Ajar’ on the dash when the door was open."
Chibano
Splits
"She told me she only waxes her legs, because if you shave one hair, then it splits and two grow back in its place."
"Can confirm, this can actually happen. Granted, it isn’t super common, but this is how most of my in-grown hairs occur when I shave under my arms. Exfoliating before shaving and then using an aftershave or just conditioner on the spot afterwards does wonders for cutting down on the frequency and discomfort of them."
SecretTeaBrewer
Limp Branches
"I asked him to plant a baby tree in the back garden. The next day I saw it and thought it looked strange. Walked up and it had been planted upside down. He thought the roots were tiny limp branches. Laughed for days."
goaheadblameitonme
"I'm a gardener and this is one of our running jokes whenever someone asks us wether we know how to plant something."
"'Yeah sure, the green end goes right into the ground, right?'"
that_gardener_girl
“she gets that from my side of the family...”
"I had a kid prior to getting together with my fiancée and having a second daughter. The father of my eldest is not in the picture and my wonderful fiancée has taken her on as his own. To the point that he frequently forgets that she isn’t his genetic offspring."
"We were at a holiday party at his parents house. I was talking to my future SIL about my eldest and her night terrors when fiancée pops off with 'she gets that from my side of the family...' cue really confused faces all around. His sister sat there and started questioning what other genetic diseases my eldest has magically got from stepdad. It took a few minutes before he figured it out. I love this man..."
coffeetish
The Smart Car
Think Sheryl Lee Ralph GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"My deeply intelligent wife lost her CAR. Like left it in a parking lot and somehow got home on Friday. Monday morning I get a text: 'Where’s my car?'"
"She’s gonna finish her medical degree next year."
Docdentanddane
Why can't people just think deeper?
Dead Serious
Animation Loop GIF by CLGiphy"My boyfriend as we were looking up at the beautiful night sky."
"'Wow, there's so much we don't know about the universe. Like where the stars go during the day. Are they still there? If not, where do they go?'"
"He was dead serious."
tinbasher97
Pull the Cord
"As I'm in labor with our daughter, my husband asks 'Do you want her to have an innie or an outie belly button?' Weird question, but whatever. So I tell him I don't mind either way, both are cute. And then he says 'Yeah, but when the Dr asks, which should we pick for her?'"
"He thought when they clamp the umbilical cord, parents tell the Dr the type of belly button they prefer. He's really smart, I promise."
NoThankYouTrebek
Hey Dave
"When my wife and I started dating in the mid 1980's she knew I was a huge fan of David Letterman. She said she had a huge surprise for me as she had tickets to see Letterman at a local venue."
"I was confused since David Letterman did not tour. I looked at the tickets she purchased and they were for the old 60's band 'The Lettermen.'"
"We didn't go, but I married her. 30 years this September."
DetroitBreakdown
"To go"
"My favorite memory of my parents is going to some fast food joint, through the drive thru. Mom is driving and giving our orders to the cashier. Just as she finishes my dad casually says 'To go' my mom, and she turns back to the cashier and says 'To go.' Two seconds of buffering later and she slaps my dad full on in the chest, who is laughing f**king hysterically. Don't think we've ever let her live that down."
ZeBootygoon
I'm Dead
Season 2 Lol GIF by Insecure on HBOGiphy"My husband and I were at Canadian Tire and they had tiny examples of tents (basically looked like they were made for barbie dolls) and the pricing for each underneath. He turned to me shocked and asked, 'Why are these so expensive for such tiny tents?!'"
"I almost died laughing."
Zombombaby
God Bless the people we love.
Do you have any stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.
A Redditor wanted to hear about what people have learned once they cohabitated with the ladies and asked:
"What did you not know or realize until after living with a woman?"
I've lived with many women. It's been... an experience.
I'll Do It!
Waking Up Sun GIF by MTV CribsGiphy"According to my wife I cannot open the living room curtains properly and she always need to redo it."
chillipotpeeps
Hygiene
"I either need to do a 1hr upper body workout to blow dry my hair, or let it sit wet for several hours while it dries after I get it wet. Plus, just getting it wet, shampooing, conditioning, and making sure I've gotten all the product out of my hair takes a good 15-20 minutes. I absolutely do not wash my hair every time I wash my body and shave or vice-versa. It just takes wayyyy too long."
RNGHatesYou
The Look
"The color of their shoes will match their earrings and their purse, and if you look carefully, will pick up the highlights of the design of their top. And that's not an accident."
"I never realized this was a manner of dressing until I saw it being assembled first hand, and then the next day at work it was like I paid attention to what my female colleagues were wearing and I'm like HOLY CRAP THEY ALL DO THIS."
LordSn00ty
It’s bizarre...
"Women are both simultaneously messier and cleaner than men. It’s bizarre how messy rooms can get with them and how quickly they can turn it around and make it clean!"
"Also random hairs everywhere, and make up stains that appear. They also have a really weird obsession with glass containers or jars."
ciregno
Heavy Lifting
Stretch Size Up GIF by 60 Second DocsGiphy"That she owns only one truly GOOD BRA. There is only one and part of your duty as a man is to protect The Good Bra."
If you are doing laundry, you must take the greatest of precautions to make sure it is properly cleaned, dried, and stored. God forbid The Good Bra ever turn up missing or in the wrong drawer."
"Ladies, why is there only one GOOD BRA?"
StillHereUBastards
I can't even discuss undergarments...
Build Up
"Started noticing a residue building up in the sink. It’s some kind of skin oil, but the wife insists I’m making it up."
Repressedmemoryfoam
Gotta Go
"I live with three female roommates and one night we got onto the discussion of bathroom habits. Two of the three believed that men always stood up to pee. Like if you were going number two and had to go number one you would stand up first and then sit down to finish the job. It was really funny to help to clarify men also sit to pee sometimes too."
zapp1121
Loose Strands
"When long, loose head hairs wash off in the shower, it's common practice to stick them to the wall rather than let them collect in the drain."
"If she forgets to remove them afterwards, it can be very confusing for the next person in the shower. Why are there a bunch of individual strands of hair deliberately stuck to the wall?"
Professor_Brooks
"Oh God this is me. I try to remember to pull the hair off. It's hard to get loose hairs off your head when it's wet so sticking them to the shower is kinda the only option."
Skin Issues
"I have never stayed on one thread as long as I've stayed on this one. Thank you OP and everyone who's posted. The ones about not knowing that pads stick to underwear rather than skin cracked me up, but also gave me new perspective. I mean, it makes perfect sense. How would someone who's never had to use one know if someone doesn't tell them?"
trumpeting_in_corrid
Stuff is moving...
Black Friday Christmas GIF by TargetGiphy"If they leave stuff at the bottom of the stairs, that means you’re supposed to bring it up. If it’s at the top of the stairs, you should bring it down. Also, the correct place for objects in the kitchen is where they currently reside. Stuff is gonna move around constantly, just roll with it."
I just chose to live alone. Men or women be damned.
Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comments below.
"What immediately makes a man/woman unattractive?"
When You Don't Have Anything Nice To Say...
"Snidely putting down other people for no reason."
"Especially if the other person was talking about something they’re passionate about."
"That sh*t hurts my soul."- serbianspy
Compliments Are Easier Than You Think...
"Speaking down to someone else in order to get the group’s attention/laugh."- spaceflower890·
A Little Kindness Goes A Long Way
"How they treat others."- bawbsmith
insulting dan levy GIF by CBCGiphyOpen Your Eyes!
"Ignorance and a wish to stay that way instead of improving."- Tigydavid135
No One Loves A Know It All
"When they think they know everything/ are always right."- SoupAddict34
Homer Simpson Fox GIF by AniDom"But Enough About Me, What Do You Think Of Me?"
"Not being interested in anyone outside of themselves."- peywally
"It's OK If I Do It..."
"Years ago, before meeting a blind date for the first time she told me over the phone that she hoped that I didn't wear glasses because she found them unattractive and couldn't see herself dating a guy with glasses."
"So, I met her later, and she wore glasses."
"I find Hypocrites unattractive now."- nsvxheIeuc3h2uddh3h1
Jurassic Park No GIFSHUT UP ALREADY!!!!!
"Constant whining."- BulldawgHokie
There's nothing wrong with being stopped dead in your tracks after an impossibly gorgeous person walks by you on the street.
But best to reserve judgment on that individual until sharing at least a word or two with them.
As the first thing they say might camouflage their beauty in the blink of an eye.
"Dear non-asexual people: if you were in a relationship with someone and they sat you down and said they are asexual, what would your reaction be?"
There Is Always A Solution
"This actually happened to me."
"My current partner told me about 3-4 years into our relationship that she realized she might be asexual."
"She told me that she'd realized since we'd been together that she'd often used sex as validation or because she thought she was supposed to."
"She'd been coming to the realization for a long time before she told me, and told me she was afraid of how I'd react."
"I'll preface my reaction by saying that we have never been monogamous, so things may have worked out differently if we were."
"I was not totally surprised."
"We tell each other everything, and I'd heard a lot about her previous partners."
"From what I gathered, I was her first long-term partner who wasn't abusive, pushy, or worse."
"I didn't feel like I'd disappointed her or turned her asexual in some way, I knew that she was telling me this because she felt comfortable that I wouldn't freak out or leave her."
"When we'd first started seeing each other I'd gone through a similar experience working up the courage to tell her I'm bi."
"The entire experience made us closer."
'That was years ago now, and we still very much love each other."
"We still have sex occasionally, but she's also fine if I seek it out elsewhere as long as I'm safe, always, and communicative, to a fault."
'Coming out to a partner is always difficult, regardless of what your sexuality is, or isn't."
"It's scary to think the person you love may feel differently about you afterward, but it's better than living a lie and letting it eat away at you."- Duckiesims
Happy Well Done GIF by LaffGiphyJust be Upfront
"i've been on a date with an asexual guy."
"He told me 1 hour into the date."
"I had nothing but respect for straight up telling me."
"I said I want sex to be a part of a relationship, he respected my choice and we had a great date."
"We were friends for long after that."- kaascheesefromage
Nope, Not Going To Work...
"Wish them well, find someone who shares my interests."- tacit_urn
Minor Detail...
"This actually happened to me."
"He was so much fun, that sex ultimately did not matter."
"We had 8 years together before he went I search of new adventures, but we stayed friends until his death."
"I still miss him."- Dang_It_All_to_Heck
Alicia Silverstone Flirting GIFGiphyAn Insurmountable Hurdle
"I’ve been there."
"College boyfriend after about a year of dating told me that he thought he was asexual."
"We had been having sex until then, and it made me feel awful thinking that he might’ve not wanted to the entire time."
"I felt bad 'making' him do that."
"It was always consensual, but I was worried he only did it because he felt he had to."
"Some people can make a relationship without sex work, but this is what I personally did not want."
"I never shamed him for his lack of sexuality, but it made navigating the relationship more challenging."
"That relationship went on for at least another year, but ended up failing for a few reasons."
"I’m quite sexual, so that became a compatibility issue."
"We did not have sex thereafter."
"He was kind of a controlling person, (not because he is asexual)."
"He would make me feel ashamed for getting turned on or, god forbid, pleasuring myself."
"He also guilted me in staying with him despite the lack of any sexual compromise."
"He basically said that if I really loved him for him we would stay together."
"And I did love him a lot at the time, so that is why I stayed."
"I know now that sex is important to me, and really it is nice to be intimate with someone and to feel wanted in that way."
"I felt ugly for the longest time because any time I brought up this issue, I would either be rejected, ouch, or shamed for wanting anything sexual."
"We were both pretty young in this relationship."
"If I were in a relationship like this now, after some more relationship experience, I would have tried to have a clearer discussion about my needs."
"In all, I hope that if anyone else finds themselves in this situation, ie with a partner that realizes they’re asexual, that you can have a serious conversation and decide if this is enough of a compatibility issue to stop seeing each other or make a compromise to match both of your needs."- Silverhime
kate hudson breaking up GIFGiphyIt Can Have Its Advantages
"Wow this is weird, this actually happened to me the other day."
"My partner came and told me she is asexual."
"We talked through what that meant to her and basically she's not anti-sex, in fact she enjoys it, she just has almost no independent interest in sex, and almost no attraction or sexual desire towards people."
"So, after checking that she was still happy with the way things are and she wouldn't prefer some alternative arrangement, we basically just agreed to continue as we have been throughout the relationship up to this point."
"Boring I know, sorry."
"In fact it made me feel more free to pursue my own kinks and desires, since sex is now something she mostly does because she wants to make me happy I feel less bad making it about my wants."- cdwols
Sex is always a very personal issue.
With that in mind, someone with a high sex drive simply might not be able to make a relationship work with an asexual person.
Though opposites do attract, which can include two people with highly opposing views and needs towards sex.
For at the end of the day, there's no ignoring a connection.