Redditor asexyjohn18 wanted to hear about all the things that get people in the mood, so they asked:
"What is a non sexual trait that turns you on?"
I love a walk. A little strut. Nothing like getting the heart racing.
Tingles
hair GIF by SB NationGiphy"Getting my head scratched or having someone run their fingers through my hair."
SensitiveDolphin55
"Same. It’s so pleasant when the tingles run down your spine... ;-) "
PumpkinSpiceMaster
LOLOL
"When a girl genuinely laughs at jokes I make."
Realistic_Practice16
"I remember being on a first date with a beautiful woman and I made a bit of corny joke/comment and she laughed at it. I remember thinking, damn, wait till I get to my good stuff. I did get to my good material apparently as we were married. She gives me as many laughs as I give her."
CarlJustCarl
Do Right
"Kindness. When I see someone going out of their way to help others for no other reason than it’s the right thing to do… that is some truly attractive vibes."
Electrical-Bid-9577
"Apparently it's vanishing from this world really fast. People who show kindness often end up in losses (of course not everytime but most of the time yes). It really breaks my heart."
Walker1798
"Probably the sexiest thing out there. Someone can be smoking hot, funny, talented, etc. But if they're not kind, they're unattractive."
sravll
Oh Yes...
"Smiling right at me, and men stretching. LAWD HAVE MERCY!!"
Skwiddling
"I have trouble smiling at women. Is this a turnoff for them? And ones I like are really hard to smile at. Because I know it's always going to be some really weird big smile if I am crushing which makes me feel like a super duper creep."
Maximum_Knee_4622
Simplicity
Happy I Love You GIF by Warner Bros. DeutschlandGiphy"Sorry if this is too kinky but i like it when they care about me."
SirReal10000
"Too far man. You need to rethink your choices."
Funkeysismychildhood
Sometimes it's all about the heart.
Eye 2 Eye
i see you GIF by VH1Giphy"When a guy explains something to you in a calm and understanding voice. Bonus points for gentle eye contact."
Belphiespillow666
GENIUS!!
"Being crazily intelligent. Screw dirty talk, I want you to explain some unexplainable s**t in my ear."
-F**KINGUSERNAME
"Heck yes. My best connections have been with a philosophy/history professor turned chancellor, an environmental engineer, and a neurosurgeon, all 3 Summa cum laude grads and conference speakers in their fields. The downside to genius though is complete absorption in their fields leaving little time for in person connection."
__trezora__
Yummies
"Everyone should know how to cook. Hunger knows no gender. I like to eat good food so I learned how to cook. I asked my mom one day and she reacted surprised. She was more than grateful to have an opportunity to teach me the ‘finer’ aspects of cooking, as she called it. Lol. I love food."
"My girlfriend, now wife, likes to jokingly say I got her into bed with a well seasoned steak and homemade fries. I mean we did sleep together almost immediately after we finished dinner so maybe she’s right. That old saying comes to mind. 'The quickest way to the heart is though the stomach.'"
SaiyanGodKing
Getting Green
"When I ask my husband for help when I repot my plants and he delicately cleans and moves the leaves. He is a mechanical engineer and he works with huge pieces of industrial equipment, seeing him so tenderly caring for my plants just makes me melt."
BoysenberryNo3877
Limbs A Lot
Excited Thomas Lennon GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"Men doing intricate work with their hands."
GooglePixel69
"I second this, also someone who can play guitar/bass real real well... just watching their hands, whoa mama."
squeaky-mcgee
Well, it seems that just about anything can get someone in the mood, especially if you're kind, courteous, and especially a good cook.
Anything to add? Let us know in the comments below!
Always a relief.
"One of those really big pressure relieving poops."- jimmygreen717
"Taking a big long pee after holding it in for an age."- BilboSwaggins1993
Side-splittinngly funny!
"A real good laugh."
"I mean a real, hearty, can barely breathe laugh."
"Sadly rare, though."- dqflynn
Kelly Clarkson Lol GIF by The VoiceGiphy"There... right there... oh, yea, that's the spot..."
"A really, really good backscratch from someone when you just can't reach an itch."- DaynoDestroyer
Quench my thirst...
"Drinking fresh water when you're extremely thirsty."- Angiiiiii
Unbridled comfort.
"Very rare nowadays, married with kids, but sitting down in comfy clothes for uninterrupted gaming."
"No chores, no plans, snacks as a plus."
"The dream."-KnackeredParrot
Jason Segel Movie GIFGiphyHot and steamy... literally...
"On a cold and rainy day, taking a hot shower after you have been outside for a while."- 177Columbus
Hitting the sheets...
"Putting clean, fresh sheets on your bed, and then crawling under them while they're still cool, enveloping you in that fresh laundry scent as they gently settle around you."- NihilisticPollyanna
True love
"The joy of realizing someone you like loves you."- DRMRCX
Season 9 Reaction GIF by The OfficeGiphyGoodbye and good riddance!
"Quitting a lousy job and peeling out of the parking lot!"- canadaguy9
For those of you going through a dry spell, maybe consider giving some of these a try.
Or who knows, maybe you'll soon discover a sensation which makes you miss sex a little bit less.
Or completely.
Reddit user MainSeparate2964 asked:
"Men of reddit, what's something non-sexual that instantly makes a women really attractive?"
Spoiler alert - almost everything on this list is something that either myself or a friend has tried to minimize about themselves.
We all know someone who has stopped smiling "too big" or laughing "too loud" or asking "too many questions" or being "too smart" or hesitated doing an activity because it was "too masculine."
Dulling your shine because you're afraid people won't like you only gives people less to like.
Laugh
"Genuine laughter."
"Someone who is comfortable being happy is someone people wanna... make 'happy.' "
- walk_through_this
"Yes this exactly. Carefree people who aren’t concerned about their outward appearance and are fine just laughing and being happy are amazing."
- thatonetraveler
"I would add that it doesn't really matter what the laugh sounds like as long as it is genuine."
"I've heard of people being self-conscious about their laughing sound and that's just silly to me, to be honest. A genuine laugh makes you very attractive!"
- stbtb
Hilary Duff Lol GIF by YoungerTVGiphyCuriosity
"A curious mind."
"Finding the interesting side of things you have never thought about before, your partner's passions, friends' hobbies, a topic in a movie/book/documentary... whatever."
"You will never run out of things to discover and get excited about with such a person."
- Jimbo_Sandcastle
"My girlfriend is a massive book nerd and just hearing her talk about books and how some books made her feel is honestly the cutest thing ever."
"God I'm a lucky moron."
- cannedrex2406
"My ex was a beautiful and accomplished woman, but had no curiosity about people or things."
"She was very focused on only her goals - which is fantastic and means she will achieve so much. But the complete lack of odd and intriguing conversations or curiosity about others (including myself) and what makes them unique was difficult."
"I’d say this is true generally too. People are so much more interesting and fun to be around when they have a genuine curiosity."
- ColinHalfhand
The Melody
"Her face lighting up when seeing me."
- seeasea
"I kept running into someone who put a smile on my face the way my then-wife simply couldn't. Never thought of straying, just felt this little melody than never really fit with the rest of the music, y'know?"
"My wife and I split over other reasons."
"I ran into that someone again and found the same smile, that same melody."
"That was almost four years ago. I'm currently waiting for that someone to come home now, and we'll be having dinner together in our home. The melody goes on and on."
- walk_through_this
"My boyfriend always says he loves how happy I am to see him, how excited I get to see him, and how I smile when I see him."
"It’s genuine. I am really that happy to see him."
- mollylg311
One Liners
"A woman that can crack a great one liner on the spot is about the most attractive, non-aesthetic attribute in my opinion."
- Burjennio
"That’s a lifer trait cause when the rest falls apart at least whip smart humor is left"
- balldatfwhutdawhut
"Half the reason I fell for my girlfriend is because, when she first met my friends, they were cracking a couple jokes, and some were at her expense (nothing mean though)."
"Before I could say anything, she immediately snapped back. Instant 10/10"
- Walshy231231
The Atmosphere
"Being straightforward."
"I breathe the atmosphere, not read it. Tell me directly what you're thinking or how you feel so I know."
- I_Love_Small_Breasts
"This is so very important. None of us can read minds, yet we do have horrible habits of trying to do so."
"If we all could just stop trying to mindread and stop expecting our own minds to be read, all of society would benefit."
- truthseeker1228
"Yes!"
"I specifically remember this one line from the office where Kelly says 'Darrel is SOOOO complicated. What kind of man just says exactly what he's thinking?!' "
"That's what made me realize that I want to be like that in my relationships. It takes some getting used to, but works great. would recommend lol."
- moist_maplecrumpet
Plot Twist!
"Being well put together, like they got their life some what straight..."
"Otherwise it won't be as devastating when I f*cking ruin it."
- UpsetYet
"You get an upvote for the unexpected twist at the end lol"
- Affectionate_Wall705
"Damn, you my ex?😭"
- _anxious_lemon
"Dude! I think I dated you in college."
- mark_f**kerburg0
Waifu
"Muscle."
"It's a sign of a woman who is neither neglectful of her health nor overly concerned with 'the perfect figure. Just someone who's figured out how to prioritize getting in her best shape while living her best life."
"That's somebody who has it figured out."
"Also buff women are hawt."
- ArchDukeNemesis
GiphyHugs
"Giving good hugs."
"As a very physical and touch starved person if someone gives me a good hug I might cry and I’ll definitely think about it all week."
- MrHoneybuns
"Bro a hug from a girl you really like, and she does it from behind as a surprise, is one of the rarest forms of flattery that men get."
"It's actually a huge shame that more women don't do it"
- MainSeparate2964
"This is how my boyfriend won me over in the very first minute of our very first date. :) "
"He gave me a warm, generous, respectful hug and I thought to myself 'damn that was a good hug.' ”
- foxglove0326
Mom Mode
"As a married man, how good my wife is to our kids."
"How much they love her reminds me every day that I chose the right woman. I have known too many men that chose a pulse over the character of the woman they're with and end up getting f*cked up pretty bad at the end of the relationship."
"When I was a single man, I'd say empathy and compassion would have been the top two to get my motor started."
- valboots
"Good mom vibes are absolutely a thing."
- Tsiar1
Enthusiasm Over Everything
"Interest / enthusiasm."
"A thousand times this. Ten BILLION times this."
"Sure my wife is attracted to me, but she also loves movies, is psyched when we take our kids to renaissance faires, and likes weird sh*t that I dig as well."
"Does she have big boobs? Yes. Is she psyched about going to an old castle to explore history? Yes."
"Does she have an @ss that won’t quit? Yes. Will she spend 5 hours at a combination book store slash petting zoo? Yes."
"Did I bang her this morning before going to work? Hell yeah. Am I psyched to watch a movie with her tonight? So very much."
- Jaws_V_The_Return
"Keep living the life my man."
- literalilliteratekat
"Good for you two! Wish you a lifetime of happiness and morning sex and movie nights."
- niiightskyyy
Happy Hailee Steinfeld GIF by Pitch PerfectGiphyThat's Hot
"Being pretty while dressing modest."
"Like, not feeling the need to show everything off. It's hot."
"I also don't mind girls showing everything off either. That's hot too."
"Turns out girls are just hot."
- o8unu
Plays Well With Angry Old Man
"Being nice."
"I have enough negativity in my life these days."
"A happy, polite, bubbly personality is amazing and it plays well with my 'angry old man' qualities."
- GingerMarquis
She's Got Moves
"A friend of mine met a girl in a bar we were at. This girl was with one of her friends."
"I wasn’t attracted to this friend so I just basically maintained conversation with her so as to give the other two some room."
"The girl was really cool so chatting was easy, but still not interested."
"At some point the girl gets bored talking, gets up, said she wanted to dance. I thought to myself: ‘awesome yeah cool, why not?’ "
"Guys and gals, those girls moves were something to fall in love to."
"I’m not talking about anything sexy or sensual or whatever, at all… just pure skill and, charisma?"
"I can’t put my finger on what it was, but my god, did that make her look like 80x more attractive, if only for a moment."
- DasThrowawayen
Us Army Dancing GIF by US National ArchivesGiphyThe Scent Of A Woman
"Scent."
"I spent 3 hours watching Batman today with a girl I’m kinda seeing and I could smell her the whole time and could barely focus on the film for wanting to kiss her."
"We’ve been seeing each other for months and spend more than enough time together but something about how she smelt today made it maddening"
- Melancholy_Prince
Not NPCs
"When they're respectful of the people around them; be nice to the server, the cashier, let the elderly go in the bus in front of you (in the same line of thought, offering your seat...), etc."
"I want to see you care, or at least know you're dealing with actual human beings."
"You're not in the Matrix, everybody around you is unique with feelings, experiences, fears, likes, dislikes... Treat them as such. All the people around are not NPCs."
- Maleficent-Bet-1371
Talent
"Being really talented at something."
"You can shred the guitar or sing? You know how to weld or scuba dive? You can paint really well? You know a martial art? Hell yeah. Skill is sexy."
"Having a sense of humor is also a really great thing. Even if you don't have a good skill, being witty and fun makes you enjoyable to be around and that counts for a whole hell of a lot."
"Just being hot and being barely able to function as an adult isn't great. Being a humorless mall mannequin of a human isn't what someone seeking a partner wants."
"Above all, being open and honest about what you want makes everything so much better. If your partner can't or won't communicate with you or you can't find an effective way to communicate with each other, there's no point in trying for any sort of relationship other than the most skin-deep sorts."
- Psych-adin
bass guitar GIFGiphyWardrobe Wonders
"Unintentional wardrobe malfunctions."
"If I can see a hint of a bra or the peek of panties it’s an instant turn on."
"Can’t be too deliberate though."
- pherring
Elation And Joy
"Reading these posts reminded me of what I enjoy when it came to a girl - like, her being genuinely happy."
"The smiles, laughs, jokes, that look in a girls eye when she is being mischievous and the smirk that comes with it, the innocent look they make when you catch them in an embarrassing situation..."
"... like mentioning needing to buy more cookies, and you turn around to find her shoving cookies in her mouth - and that pause as you two watch one another, before both bursting out in laughter."
"God, I want this feeling of elation and joy again. I haven't felt it since years before my Divorce."
- Captain_Blackbird
As for me ... yeah that whole list of things I was insecure about makes up the bulk of why my partner adores me.
He loves that I'm the "worst evil genius" he knows. He is totally into the cartoons, he sings backup when I bust out a silly song, he jumps in and joins me when I do a happy taco dance.
Oh, and the best part; he snort-laughs and he has a big goofy smile like Spongebobs eager face, too!
AND THIS MAN GOT ME A STEP STOOL SO NOW I CAN REACH LIKE 2, MAYBE 3, SHELVES!
Authenticity, fam.
Get you some.
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Reddit user Gokusrightnut asked:
"Women of Reddit, what is a non-sexual thing your partner does that gets you in the mood every time?"
Get ready to take your screen shots, jot down notes, etc. There's a lot of lesson here.
As a woman, please, I implore you... use the power held in this article wisely.
Two Words
"Ahem 'Good Girl' "
- tacos4uandi
"My boyfriend one time whispered that in my ear and I swear I felt my throat and heart both drop to my vagina."
- Trackgirl123
"My main squeeze says this to me and I absolutely go weak at the knees."
"It's just the way it rolls off his tongue omg. Like, yes sir I am a good girl please tell me more lol"
- kdoesthings
GIF by TLC EuropeGiphyThe Big O(boe?)
"One my friends got married last year and now I'm good friends with her husband. He basically told me that he found out that whenever he plays his oboe (he's in an orchestra or something?) she always wants to have sex."
"He's just started playin it whenever he gets in the mood now."
- Deep_Delay3414
"Guys who are Musically Talented are Caliente AF!!!!"
- funlovingfirerabbit
"Maybe she’s oboesexual"
- ItsDeathBySnuSnu
Domestic Bliss
"I don’t know about other women. But my wife gets turned on when I am 'domestic.' ”
- mattdr1990
"Lol, I texted my wife and told her I vacuumed our house with the vacuum we had just purchased a few days earlier. She told me to stop sending her sexy texts while she was at work."
"She 'thanked' me when she got home. 😎😎😎"
- blyss73usa
"Honestly men taking care of kids is one of my biggest turn ons. Seeing a Dad being cute with his baby girl, even just the guy making silly faces at my daughter."
- dollyprincessb
Sexy Sleeves
"When my husband rolls up the sleeves of his sweaters."
"Don't know why, but that look is just so sexy to me haha."
- NalaandBuddy
"Giiirl. Met a guy with his sleeves rolled up while in a bar."
"Went up to him & commented on how hairless his forearms are. He’s Asian and I’m Greek (which equals hairy) and I had a few at that point so I had no filter."
"He responded and said he’s as smooth as a dolphin. We’re married now."
"Rolled up sleeves is what brought me to my husband 😂"
- No-Business2452
"I absolutely understand."
- VanillaInner
Eye Contact
"I'm really into when guys take a sip of something without breaking eye contact with me. Bonus if it's alcohol."
- Preachingsarcasm
"I’d misjudge the distance between face and drink and spill it."
- ineffectivegoggles
Saints And Sinners Smile GIF by BounceGiphySomething Needs Fixing
"Weird as hell, but my girl loves how I carry a ladder. No idea why."
"But when she's in a bad mood best believe there's something up high that needs fixin."
- RynoLasVegas
"I like to think you go unscrew a few light bulbs every night. Just in case."
- vitiku
"And then screw them back in... if yanahwhaddamean!"
- RynoLasVegas
Tummy Peek
"Every time I see my boyfriend stretch and I get to see the tiniest bit of his stomach ... I don't know man it just does something to me"
- moorasi
"The tummy peek is hot!"
- scaly_friends_4me
The Tool Belt
"My girlfriend seems pretty insistent on watching me any time I wear my toolbelt around the house."
"I always think 'Lady, I'm no piece of meat!' but then I love it when she treats me like one 🤷🏽♂️"
"Needless to say, it's usually the last thing to come off."
- benign_from_behind
Orange Construction GIF by DrSquatchSoapCoGiphyLinguistics
"I agree with all of these and want to add how I love it when my husband speaks Spanish."
"I don’t know 95% of what he is saying when he’s on the phone with family/friends, but good lord. And if it’s a work call and he’s using his commanding 'work voice', double hot."
- ronsinblush
"When we’re speaking English and he answers the phone or just talks to someone else in his native language (German). I think German is hot already but the sudden switch is just too much to handle."
- scarlettcandlestick
Grunts
"The grunts he makes when he’s fixing something/working out…"
"One time we were at the junk yard and just watching him pull parts made me wanna do it in one of the random cars right then and there."
- Soclothesminded
Alright fellas, you got all that?
Get out there and make us proud.
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