People Confess How They Thought Babies Were Made When They Were Little
Reddit user lLoveYourCat asked: 'How did you think babies were made when you were little?'
In the United States, it's no secret that sex education for minors is inconsistent at best.
But some people learned very unexpected stories about how babies were made, and those stories had a way of making a lasting impression.
Curious about other's stories, Redditor ILoveYourCat asked:
"How did you think babies were made when you were little?"
One Time's the Charm
"I knew babies came from sex as a fairly young child. My parents never sugar-coated that. But for some reason, as a kid, I thought you only had to have sex once to have multiple pregnancies. I seriously didn't fix that misunderstanding until early middle school."
- Crazey1988
"At some point, when I finally accepted that you had to have sex to have a baby, I thought the only time people have sex was to make a baby, and it only took one time to get the job done."
"Then when I figured out teenagers were having sex, I thought you had to be married and have sex to make a baby, but then when my unmarried cousin got pregnant, I was just confused."
"But I was sure my parents only had sex four times, and then when my mom got pregnant with number five, I thought, 'Wow, they did it again.'"
- Raw_Combination_438
Stealing Storks
"A stork delivered them, of course. What the f**k, lol (laughing out loud)."
- Dells51
"Storks... I thought people trained them to steal babies from a factory and you would leave special treats on your doorstep as payment and encouragement for the stork to steal one for you."
"I was scared to death of birds for the longest time and would have a tantrum at the zoo when I saw a flamingo."
- No_Finish_3144
Young Conspiracy Theorist
"The government. I used to think that we lived in a totalitarian society and that the government was in complete control of everything."
- bebotak**t
"I thought the President sent people their babies when asked by mail."
- GustavoAlex7789
Scheduled Baby Delivery
"The women in my family explained to me at the age of six that a doctor calls you sometime after reaching adulthood at the age of 18 to schedule a baby delivery date."
"The husband either pays to schedule the appointment or the government does after verifying that you have been married and financially stable for quite some time."
- Lokikat00
Marital Kissing
"When two people kissed."
- Short-Reality7353
"I thought the same thing, but I understood that when my mom gave me a kiss, there was no risk. Being someone raised in a very Christian background, I assumed that when you got married, God made kissing a reproductive act."
"Since I made this assumption, I remember questioning why teenage pregnancy could possibly be an issue."
- meuserj
The Ultimate Christmas Gift
"I thought Santa was bringing them."
- NorskoTheScorpion
"He was. I mean, Christmas comes but once a year..."
- Nouveauuuu
"I MAY NEVER ENJOY CHRISTMAS AGAIN."
- NorskoTheScorpion
A New Meaning to 'Forest Friends'
"When I used to ask my dad where I came from, he'd say he found me under a rock in the forest. Of course, I would go look for babies under rocks, too, but all I ever saw was dirt and those rolly-polly pill bug thingies."
"It was so gross thinking babies were just found THERE that I was actually relieved to find out how they were actually made!"
- melodie-artist
Pregnant By Proximity
"I thought women got pregnant by just being around a man, and I was always confused about what would happen if a woman still lived with her parents or dad after she’s an adult."
- ILoveYourCat
Coming of Age Story
"I thought it was a 'just happens once you reach a certain age' sorta thing. As a woman, I was terrified because pregnancy sounds like the most awful thing, lol (laughing out loud)."
"(I know the end result is worth it but even as a 31-year-old, I'm like, nope.)"
- BansheeShriek
Sounds Plant-Based
"I thought they grew like a seed inside the mother's belly."
- maclaglen
"Technically, that’s true."
- ManagementFresh4960
"Watermelon seeds."
- bravovice
"Well, not like that."
- ManagementFresh4960
The Power of Marriage
"My mum told me you couldn't have a baby if you weren't married. Note that she said 'couldn't', not 'shouldn't'."
"When my unmarried cousin was sleeping a lot my mum told my aunt 'she's having a baby'. I thought 'she can't be having a baby, she isn't married.'"
"A couple of weeks later she had an engagement party, quickly followed by a registry office wedding. She had a baby a few months later."
- MolassesInevitable53
Baby Trees
"I thought they grew on trees. True story."
- 8inchsalvatorre
"Baby trees, lol (laughing out loud)."
- ILoveYourCat
"I was surprised when I learned how it really happened, lol. I was like, 'You mean there are no trees?' And Mom just shook her head."
- 8inchsalvatorre
They Were Just There
"I don't recall a time where I gave the matter any thought without knowing the reality of it."
"Like, literally, until the day I was first introduced to the concept of birth, I don't think I cared where babies came from."
- N_Who
"Right, the little guys just EXISTED."
- Mizar97
Educated Is Best
"I asked my mom and she told me the truth."
"Educate your kids, folks. They can handle it."
- Bite_Me_23
Spontaneous Babies
"I didn’t... They just showed up, honestly."
- badguywindow
"That’s what I thought. I was terrified as a little kid that I’d wind up being a teenage mother because I thought it just happened spontaneously."
- dinosore
"Exactly what I thought would happen. Like one day you were just, boom, six months pregnant."
- badguywindow
While these responses might be funny, it's an important reminder of an area in the educational system that's often lacking.
But in the meantime, while the system's curriculum is getting sorted out, at least we can take comfort in the fact that we weren't alone in believing these tall tales.
Being a doctor comes with many challenges.
Long hours, challenging surgeries, icky symptoms or injuries.
The most frustrating challenge that all doctors find themselves dealing with, however, might be stubborn patients.
Patients who think they know better than their doctors, despite the fact that they haven't completed medical school or residency.
Or patients who simply don't seem to grasp what their doctors are telling them and constantly return with the same problem.
Often putting themselves in dangerous, possibly fatal, situations, and leading their doctors to wish that all their patients were just ever so slightly more informed.
"Doctors of Reddit, what is something that you wish everyone knew about their body?"
Stick To The Dosage!
"This one is more about medication."
"Antibiotics only work against bacteria, they are not some kind of wonder potion that cures anything, and they should not always be given."
"Please please stick to your prescription the doctor gives you."
"Even if you already feel better, don't just stop unless the doctor says you can stop."
"A lot of medication needs to be taken according to the prescription in order for it to be effective, because you build up the doses to an effective level."
"Stopping or not sticking to it really decreases effectivity."- jonneyboy112
Be Honest.
"Tell us what drugs and alcohol you’re on."
"We aren’t gonna tell the cops."
"We aren’t gonna lecture you."
"But it might change the anesthesia I give you."
"Some stuff I give you might kill you."
"If you drink a 30 pack a day, tell me."- CopyX
When To Be Alarmed If There's Blood
"Ejaculating blood happens to most people at least once in their lives and in 99% of cases it resolves without taking any action within a week."
"It doesn't even warrant a doctor visit."
"Peeing blood, for both sexes, is a serious medical emergency and you should immediately go to the ER."
"People think it's the other way around."- StardustDoc
A Diet May Not BE Helping You
"How to eat healthy."
"Just because you're skinny doesn't mean you're healthy."
"Especially the teenagers who I take care of."
"Sometimes I will ask them what's a healthy food your doctor wants you to eat?"
"Rarely do I get a right answer."
"I feel like the internet has so many fad diets, and family members rarely cook, so families don't know basic nutrition facts."- Thornloki256
No Two Bodies Are The Same
"That there is a wide range of 'normal'."
"Don't be embarrassed by your body."
"Having said that, if you are concerned about anything, ask your doctor."
"We have generally heard it all before, and trust me, we have, nearly always, seen it all before."
"Maybe you have something that has been bothering you for ages, but you were too scared or embarrassed to ask about it."
"Just ask! It might be 'nothing' and you have been stressing about it for no reason."
"And if not, then you are at least one step closer to getting it fixed."
"No one can help if they don't know."
"There are no stupid questions, so ask away."
"I'm always amazed when I have been asked about something that has been bothering a patient for years and years, but they were too embarrassed / scared to bring it up."
"Most of the time, it is nothing / a completely normal body function / feature."
"Other times, it is something that should have been discussed right away."
"YOU know your body best."
"So speak up! Don't wait for the doctor to 'ask the right question'."- frangipani_c
life tripping GIFGiphyAll In Moderation
"Some people seem to think that if you act healthy for a bit, it'll make up for being a wreck."
"There are so many things wrong with this."
"Just one example, antioxidants are like gas for your car."
"You can store up a certain amount of vitamins, but your tank can only hold so much."
"If you binge and overfill your tank, it doesn't do anything, you excrete it out as waste, and you can't expect to go the next several months without gas just because you tried to overload it before."
"You're going to still need to get gas."
"Same goes for your fruits and veggies."
"Had someone tell me he went vegetarian for a few weeks, which meant he was done for the year."
"He was dead serious."
"Had a patient at risk for heart failure try to insist that if she stayed away from salt entirely for x days/weeks, she should be able to have her fill of McDonald's fries and ramen."
"Had a smoker argue that if he stopped for some time, he should be able to smoke freely for a while."
"With some digging, 'stopping' turned out to mean a couple less cigarettes a day."- bhappyyyy
Angry New Amsterdam GIF by Global TVGiphyIt is very surprising indeed, when patients either ignore or dismiss advice given to them by their doctors.
Particularly as they felt the need to go and see their doctor in the first place.
Who hasn't on one occasion or another looked at someone with a svelte physique and become green with envy?
Wishing that we looked like them, and compelling us to hit the gym and lose a few pounds.
As such, we often roll our eyes when skinny folk complain about their weight and/or appearance.
But should we be throwing them the cold shoulder or offering a shoulder to cry on instead?
As maybe being skinny, by choice or simply genetics, might not be as easy or glamorous as it appears.
"What is the worst thing about being skinny?"
Lack Of Padding For Your Bones
"Its so easy to hit your pelvic bone on the side into things, and it hurts so much."- Lord_Botond
"My partner and I are both skinny."
"When we are intimate it often happens that it's just bone on bone which is not comfortable."
"Like this morning we where spooning. "
"I was the little spoon."
"And he had his arm resting on my hip."
"That's all it takes."
"There is just no soft cushion between us."- SnowdropWorks
Treated Like A Doll On A Shelf...
"People feel the need to just pick you up all the time."
"Put me down!"
"I don't care how strong you are!"- JBroms
Carrying Pick Up GIF by The Only Way is EssexGiphyMore Noticeable Changes in Appearance
"People noticing every fluctuation in weight."- Own-Discussion5137
Cuddling Impaired
"Lap isn’t as comfy for dog to sit on."- DontStopMe_
"Do You Have This In My Size?"
"Finding pants that fit."- Vigothedudepathian
Golden Girls Pants GIF by TV LandGiphyUnfair Assumptions...
"People assuming you have an eating disorder."- Sirens-Song69
We Can Squeeze You In
"As someone who was underweight in my childhood up to my early 20’s, and suddenly obese in my 30’, It doesn’t matter what weight you are, people will always have something to say about it."
"But one thing I HATED about being skinny, was always being the one to have to sit in the middle seat in the car."- Wild-Bee-7415
No Seatbelt Strong Enough
"It's easier to be tossed around in a fight."- meitz88
Shook Star Trek Voyager GIF by Star TrekGiphyAlways Needing To Bring A Cushion
"Going to an amusement park and realizing that no one else thinks the seats on the rides are too hard."
"I was in pain."- tiredfoodlover
As the saying goes, "the grass is always greener in someone else's yard."
Next time you're seated next to someone who doesn't seem to have an ounce of fat on their body, think twice before letting jealousy or judgement get the better of you.
Instead, maybe consider how lucky you are that the hard chair or bench you're sitting on is far more uncomfortable for them...
No matter the country, the law is a difficult beast.
Laws can change street by street.
So who knows if you're doing what's right?
But every civilian fancies themself an expert.
Guess what genius... we're wrong.
But on TV...
Redditor IfItQuackedLikeADuck wanted the legal eagles to share some truth.
So they asked:
"Lawyers, What's a law that isn't real that normal people insist exists?"
The law is tricky. So help us out.
We see you...
mean girls amy GIFGiphy"People that think it's illegal to be video taped in a public space."
RmeMSG
Goodwill...
"In the UK, people often claim that if an item is listed for sale in a shop then the shop legally has to sell it to you at that price. This is not true at all as the shop doesn't have to sell you anything at any price."
"Often as a gesture of goodwill shops will honour erroneous prices, but they are under absolutely no obligation to do so."
HereForTheTurnips_
Her Choice
"Probate attorney here. I’ve had many people ask me when the 'reading of the will' is going to take place. I explain to them that only happens in movies. But one of these days I am going to have one, and hire a mysterious blonde wearing a veil to sit in the corner quietly."
"Then I’ll tell everyone that she inherits everything. Provided, of course, that she must adopt the decedent’s cute but troublemaking six year old child no one knew about. Or she can spend the night in a haunted house. Her choice."
SpaceFaceAce
Thanks Eric
"That commercial use of a photograph means selling the photograph."
"Commercial use means that there is an implied endorsement. You can take and sell photos of Eric Clapton all day long. Put that same photo in an advertisement for a certain guitar without a release and you can be sued."
xaclewtunu
Not true...
Big Boi Smh GIF by OutkastGiphy"An arrest isn't magically invalidated if the police don't read you your rights on the spot."
"There could be a whole thread of just misconceptions people have from watching Cop TV."
Auntie_Hero
I knew Olivia Benson was lying.
$$$ Talks
Bugs Bunny Money GIF by Looney TunesGiphy"In California, it's not illegal to discuss your wages with your co-workers, despite what your boss might say."
Coolest_Breezy
100 Feet Away
"Am a lawyer. This is not a law that doesn’t exist, but a law that is misunderstood. Typically, you can’t just go get a restraining order against anybody. Most states have specific laws for who you can get restraining orders against (typically household members or former romantic interests). Usually, it’s only in domestic violence cases or for victims of crimes. You can’t just get a restraining order and comically use it to keep someone 100 feet away."
"*in the United States, at least."
hawkjc19
Damn you Sam
"'When my parents die, the government is going to seize a big chunk of the inheritance and I'll get nothing.'"
"In the US this is a very common misconception. Although state inheritance taxes vary, the US federal taxes on inheritance don't actually kick in until the estate's value exceeds US$5 million."
"So, for the vast majority of working class folks, the federal inheritance tax won't have any effect. But people will still talk to their family lawyers and ask about how much Uncle Sam is taking away when mom or dad die."
dusmeyedin
Suggestions
"It's a law that exists but widely misunderstood is the concept of Entrapment. If the police put a Bait vehicle in a high crime area, that is NOT entrapment. If the police are watching a bar known to overserve to see if there are impaired drivers at the end of the night that is NOT entrapment. Entrapment only occurs when a gov agent suggests committing a crime that you were not otherwise going to commit."
Dinothegreen
Secrets
Angry Inside Out GIF by Disney PixarGiphy"A real, but widely misunderstood law is HIPAA. People think it protects you from literally any discussion of your health issues by anyone at all. Nope. Not even close."
I need a lawyer. NOW!
Do you have any misconceptions to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.
Women Share The Biggest Misconceptions About Their Bodies All Men Should Know
The mysteries of a woman's body have enchanted men since the beginning of time.
Having met many men I feel that mystery will continue to the end of time.
Which is a surprise seeing how you can research just about anything on Google.
Class is in session gents.
Redditor Miguenzo wanted all the men out here to take some notes, the ladies need you to listen up.
"Ladies of Reddit, what is the biggest misconception about your bodies that all men should know?"
A Rusty Knife
"Trim and file your nails, your penis might not feel it when you pleasure yourself but weare like ‘wtf does he have a rusty knife on him?’ We know and it kills whatever you were trying to accomplish."
mandysreality
Like a wave...
"Miscarriages are not, in my experience, a quick over and done with situation. My miscarriage started out as spotting and I immediately got nervous. Went to the ER and of course found out ultrasound was picking up no heart beat. HCG levels were falling. I was not given a D&C. I was sent home and had the worst 'period' of my life at the point for over a week."
"There was a lot of painful cramping, blood went from spotting to full force to chunky. My hormones went out of whack and I broke out like I was in puberty. I was physically and emotionally and mentally a wreck. If your partner is or ever suffers a miscarriage, even if they didn’t want the little bean, it’s still a huge event and just be there for them."
"And don’t tell that person things happen for a reason. I heard that a lot that week. Though it might have actually been what found my thyroid condition, I still don’t consider my miscarriage and my loss some trivial reason to have found another medical crises. I really wanted that baby."
"It was early on so I’ll never know what it was but my heart always sticks to the feeling it was my little boy. And if the person who lost a pregnancy still thinks about it, or still feels sad and it comes to their mind now and then, just let it rush in and then back out. Like a wave, sometimes we just need to wade in the waters."
been2thehi4
For the very first time...
"Just because we are tight doesn’t mean we are a virgin. We are probably either uncomfortable or just built that way. Once had a conversation with a boy who tried to convince me (a woman) that I’m wrong and he’s right. He was a Virgin."
Lonely_otter207
"Along the similar lines, having intercourse can strengthen the vaginal muscles and make a girl feel tight. The vagina stretches to accommodate different sizes and constricts afterwards back to its regular size."
subtleshocker
ask, ask, ask!
"Only a select few will have a natural and healthy thigh gap. It is by far not the norm. Also, what worked on your ex' doesn't necessarily work for your new partner, so ask, ask, ask!"
Zelldandy
"The thigh gap thing is just obvious. Only time I could see a guy being confused about that is if a woman is using shapewear and everything just falls out when they take it off."
Shaqfu4052
Wow women have a lot going on.
The Messy Truth
"Pregnancy really f**ks a body up. There's still a lot of stigma about talking about it but it's not just getting big and then popping out a baby. Your abs can separate, your vagina can tear, most care kits for new moms involves a lot of numbing spray for her body that is ripped apart."
"If your wife has recently given birth she's going to need you to be a superstar of support. Tuning out and letting her take the lead because you can't breastfeed is about the worst thing you can do for your marriage."
SloppyNachoBros
Body Marks
"Stretch marks are the most normal things in the world! Treat them accordingly. An ex friend of mines old boyfriend got her naked and saw them and asked her, horrified, how she got hurt. Of course men can get them too! any single person who has a growth spurt anywhere can. I've just only seen confusion/assumptions about it more often on the male part rather than knowledge."
audreyshepburn
Closures
Bbc Three Comedy GIF by BBCGiphy"I swear I wish I was making this up, but I had one guy ask me if it's true that our vagina 'closes' when we get to our menopausal age. Like it ceases to be there. No sir, it doesn't."
SelfHelpful1849
Well that is a lot to process. But I date boys, so I can let it all go. The rest of you, pay attention.