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People Share The Most 'WTF' Thing Their Parents Have Ever Said

"Reddit user TheGasMove asked: 'What has a parent said to you that made you go wtf?'"

A baby chimpanzee looks in shock with their hand over their mouth
Photo by Nagara Oyodo

Just because someone is an adult or a parent doesn't mean crazy things can't fall out of their mouths every so often.

Sometimes parents say the darndest things.

That's why we should always have a pen or a recording device at the ready.

I suggest the phone.

Just wear fitted tees with pockets and hit record.

You have know idea how much having receipts will pay off mentally later.

Redditor TheGasMove wanted to hear about what things parents have said to their kids that left kids SHOOKETH, so they asked:

"What has a parent said to you that made you go WTF?"

The amount of things my mother has said to me that has left me gobsmacked is endless.

I should've kept a journal.

Comedy gold.

The Proof

Jennifer Lawrence Reaction GIFGiphy

"After I told my mother that I didn't open up to her or my dad because I didn't trust them with my emotions, she started screaming that she hated me. Like, girl, this is exactly why I don't tell you things 😂."

LandPiranha63

Lessons Learned

"My mom told me that women pooped babies out of their butt. I believed this until I was 12 or 13. Boy, I got laughed at when I used this as my answer when asked in Sex Ed."

Eastern-Operation275

"I (27 F) have divorced parents and my mom always taught me the proper anatomy for things and that it's nothing shameful. On the other end, one day when I was at my dad's, a stray cat gave birth on his porch, and my stepsisters (same age) told my half-sister that it was coming out of the cat's butt, and I was like dude what? I questioned them, and they gave me scornful looks like I just said something offensive. LOL."

SpaceTimeBurrito

SURPRISE!!!

"A few months ago I had gone to do a surprise visit to my grandparents on my dad’s side. While I was driving up their property I saw them walking in their groceries and witnessed seeing my dad for the first time. I had never met my dad in my life but knew my grandparents."

"I walked up and greeted my grandmother and she ushered me over to talk to my father. As I went to greet him this dude threw his hood on and jumped in his truck and locked the doors and said no words to me. Never in my life have I witnessed a grown man run away like that."

Dabtoker3000

Facts...

"My father once told me that between my brother and I, I was his favorite. This caught me off guard because I thought parents weren’t supposed to have favorites."

fun_Dip_fan

"My dad once told me I’m not his favorite. So I told him he’s not my favorite either. Proceeded to get angry."

Honest_Math_7760

"It's problematic to share with your kids that you have a favorite."

LackEfficient7867

Bald Choices

Regret No GIF by Outside TVGiphy

"I shaved my head at 21 and kept that hairstyle for the last 28 years. My dad walked into my room when I was 26 and asked me for a comb! He looked at me, thought about it for a second, and laughed. RIP dad. I miss you."

Content-Damage8406

It's my hair. I'll do what I want to.

That's the kid's motto.

Adults not so much.

At least that was my experience.

Why Bother?

Ytho GIFGiphy

"When I called my mother to find out a good time of year to visit her she said, 'What for?'"

Space_T0ilet

Sure Papa Joe!

"Wasn’t my parents but my Grandpa."

“'Josh can you take me to see Marge?' Marge was his long-time girlfriend who had Alzheimer’s. My GP was in his 70s at the time and we took away his car because he was a dangerous man behind the wheel, to say the least. 'Sure Papa Joe!' That or PJoe was his nickname."

"Drive him to the place Marge was cared for at. Stop at the front and ask 'How long until I come back?' He replied 'Give me an hour. That should be long enough for us to have sex.' I start crying laughing and he leaves with a giant smirk. I could never look at him again without thinking or saying 'Almost 80 and still getting after it, WTF!"

ackbosh

The Joker

"Oof. I hadn’t talked to my dad in 15 years. I decided to reach out (for certain reasons and not to restart a relationship). He asked if he could ask me about my life. I let him. I told him, among other things, I was in a wonderful relationship with a terrific gal."

“'Is this a real relationship or like the girlfriends I had when I was with your mother.'”

"I was equally glad I disowned him 15 years ago, disappointed a man and a father would speak like that to his estranged son, and angry that he was the father I was born to. He is just one big joke to me."

Silence-brothers

Chop Chop

Steve Harvey Reaction GIFGiphy

"I would often visit the kitchen to watch how my mother cooks. One day when my father saw me coming out of the kitchen, he said 'You keep visiting the kitchen, your penis and testicles are gonna fall off. That’s how girls are made.” Context: I was 7 when he said that to me and we are a Korean family."

DeepSleepr

Learning to cook, is a great survival skill.

More dads need to get onboard with that.

Lost In Translation: Words Foreigners Wish Existed In English

Reddit user Don_Pickleball asked: 'What is a word that exists in your native language that is sorely missed in English?'

brown wooden surface
Photo by Hannah Wright on Unsplash

The great thing about foreign languages is that each language has its own expressions and words that don't necessarily have translations in other languages.

My mother tongue is an Indian language called Telugu.

In Telugu, we have several words and phrases that don't exist in English, even though I wish they did.

One example is the word 'gaadida guddu.' Literally, it means 'a donkey's egg,' but the word is usually used to denote nonsense.

Essentially, when someone says, 'gaadida guddu,' they are saying something is 'as believable as a donkey's egg' (which means it's unbelievable since donkeys don't lay eggs)!

Redditors know lots of words and phrases in foreign languages that don't exist in English and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor Don_Pickleball asked:

"What is a word that exists in your native language that is sorely missed in English?"

A Feeling

"In German we have the word 'Geborgenheit' which describes a very specific feeling of feeling cozy and safe and protected. Like you would feel when you're around loved ones sitting around a fire or when the person you love holds you under the warm covers when it's raining outside. I tried to explain this to someone the other day and when we googled the translation- it came up with 'cozyness' which really doesn't pay justice to what it actually means."

– Else1

"“Saudade” it has a similar meaning to “miss you” but we have a direct translation for that “senti sua falta”, saudade has more of an emotional feel to it, it’s really hard to explain, it’s deeper than simply missing someone Btw I’m Brazilian so the language is Portuguese"

– peddy_D

"Gigil? It's when something's so cute you get this sort of feeling of violence? I don't think I'm explaining it right. Kilig is also a similar feeling, but that one is for love; something's so romantic it gives you goosebumps? Or makes you giddy."

– ClickGrayson

Expanding My Vocabulary

"And we have "verschlimmbessern" if you try to fix something but actually make it worse than it was before."

– Chili919

"I need this word in my life."

"Send help...."

– elmonstro12345

Categories

"I miss roles in friendship distinguished in Polish. “Kolega” is a friend who you like spending time with. Partying or chilling. You socialise and have a good time. “Przyjaciel” is a friend whom you don’t need to keep in touch or have a good time. But when some bad thing is happening, you know you can call him."

– CodNo503

Similar Words, Different Meanings

"I remember being in Prague and seeing something along the lines of "Pozor, Polizia voruye" which meant 'attention, the police is looking' but in Russian/Ukrainian it sounds exactly like you'd say 'Shame, the police is stealing'"

– SignificantAssociate

"“Bom dia” means good morning in your language."

""Bom dia” means bomb him in mine."

"We are not the same."

– borazine

A Beautiful Sight

"There is a Japanese term “Komorebi”, for which no English translation exists. It roughly translates as “the scattered light that filters through when sunlight shines through trees.""

"I love how some languages are able to describe such beautiful moments in life."

– tipsy_jana

​Grateful For Existence

"Backpfeifengesicht. "A face in need of a fist""

"I'm not a violent person but I appreciate that this word exists."

– No_Tamanegi

I've Felt That!

"Definitely not my native language, but I love --"

""Kuchisabishii“ is a Japanese term which directly translates to 'lonely mouth; when you're not hungry, but you eat because your mouth is lonely."

– MOS95B

The Right Clothes

"Kalsarikännit in Finnish. Literally "underwear drunk" , or more spesifically, "long john drunk.""

"Meaning deliberately getting drunk alone at home in your underpants with zero plans of meeting anyone or going out. I think other nations do this as well, but don't have a word for it."

"Delightfully relaxing and therapeutic at times, slightly concerning if done excessively."

"At best a wonderful opportunity to touch base with your self, your life and your deepest thoughts and feelings. And/or watch that one cheesy comedy from 1992 you love but can't get any of your friends to watch with you because they have standards."

"At worst you wake up to an unholy mess accompanied by a killer headache, cheese all over the bed, cryptic messages on ripped up pieces of pizza box cardboard written by you to you all over the kitchen, and have nobody to blame than yourself."

"I've seen it translated somewhere as "pants drunk", but actual pants are much too fancy attire for this. For full experience you need to wear your most comfortable, decades old long johns that have holes and a weird stain that somehow never comes off in the wash."

– Fit_Share_6147

I Want To Say It!

"My native language is a Native American language called Comanche and isn't a written language but the word sounds like "chaw-tamaw-tey-quat" and it basically is a socially acceptable way to say "I'm done speaking.""

– SCP-33005

"That's fantastic, I'd get so much use out of that."

– HeidiKrups

Baby Bear

"Lagom (swedish)"

"It means not bad, and not too good. Just an average between. A very neutral word."

"For example, when you wash your hands, the water should be lagom hot. Not cold, not scalding hot. Just lagom."

Live_Rock3302

Who Doesn't Do This?

"Japanese has loads of words that require entire sentences to explain in English. My favorite of all time is tachiyomi, which means "standing at a newsstand reading something without any intention of paying for it.""

– the2belo

I do this all the time, with novels at the bookstore.

Nice to know there's a word for it in some language!

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