We all like to say we accept people the way they are.
We don't judge anyone without knowing them, and even once we do know them, we try to give them the benefit of the doubt. There may be a reason they can't be authoritative parents, or they have bad table manners.
Truthfully, however, we all have something we judge people for.
Sometimes, we're overt about it. More often, we judge people secretly, but we still judge.
Redditors know this all too well and dished about what they judge people for.
It all started when Redditor lukiiiiii asked:
“What do you secretly judge people for?”
I'd Rather Not See That
"Shoes off in public places. Like I saw a person at a soccer game. He had shoes and socks off, and cracking his toes on the top of the seat in front of him"
– ASP204
"In my country, (NZ), It's quite normal for people to walk around the streets in barefeet. But that, the is just nasty."
– muffin_eater1
What's In A Name?
"Parents giving their kids awful "trendy" names"
– urbexbabe
"Or take two common names and combine them into a new name. I’m looking at you, Utah."
– lordhalibut
"I hate when people b*stardise good names like Jaymee instead of Jamie."
– Minime1993
Pets Are Family; Now Treat Them Well
"Irresponsible pet ownership. Your dog shouldn’t have matted fur and should be housetrained, the fact that half of your outdoor cats never came home should be considered a sign you’re doing something wrong, that lizard needs enrichment, Guinea pigs should live in pairs, and ffs stop torturing fish to death in a bowl!"
– Redqueenhypo
How Do You Write?
"Bad grammar and spelling"
– you_will_be_the_one
"Lose and loose, affect and effect are ones I find most infuriating. I think because they're not just the wrong words, but they're pronounced differently so when I'm reading my brain has a hard time seeing the word "loose" and pronounce it like "lose.""
– bikewrenchsucks
"I agree with this 100% I don't get how some people, even adults, can still not know the difference between your and you're."
– YouInevitable2999
Judge The Judgey
"The only people I judge are those that are overly judgmental and gossip about everyone for everything, especially when it’s something someone can’t help, or hasn’t had the privilege to “buy” themselves out of."
"I don’t give a sh*t if you don’t like her hair, Barbara. I don’t give a sh*t if you think he acts weird because he’s quiet, Harold, and Nancy, I CERTAINLY don’t care about your pretentious a** opinion on your neighbors not living up to your personal lifestyle. I don’t give a F*CK. Let people live."
– KPal93
Be Polite
"When they don't have basic manners (thank you, please, excuse me, etc)"
– CoyaiPijao
"Don’t forget chewing with their mouth open. Annoys the hell out of me."
– Tra1nGuy
Everyone Deserves Respect
"How they treat service employees."
– MissKleenex1990
"I don't. I openly judge them for that. The biggest fights I got into with my old roommate was over his treatment of waiters and fast food workers. I refused to go out to eat with him ever again."
– PhreedomPhighter
Words Should Sound Right To Be Right
"When someone pronounces the word frustrated as FUSS-trated"
– captainpennyfarthing
"I don’t understand, you’re going to have to be more pacific."
– MrSleepless1234
"Or when library is pronounced “lie-berry”"
– HammerHorrorWhore
Do It Safely
"I know I’m not supposed to, but smoking."
– Ghost9283
"For me it’s not whether they smoke but how they smoke. Smoking in doorways or near kids or ignoring/being rude to people who politely ask them to stand down wind or something. It’s super disrespectful"
– breakingswipev
Maybe We Should All Just Say Accidentally
"When people say "on accident.""
– brokenmike
"Same, but it seems like more people say “on accident” than “by accident”. I asked some friends because I thought on accident sounded stupid but they all said they say it that way so I’m confused"
– stealthman55
Unhygienic
"Long fingernails..like unnaturally long. It’s germ city and most people don’t wash their hands properly. 🤢🤢"
– TakeMyrtleHiking
Gathering Likes
"Posting their kids on social media - even if they (the adults) don't mind putting their kids on there, the kids may not like it when they are old enough to understand."
– Cautious_Action_1300
Human Nature
"Their appearance though I think everyone does that once in awhile. It’s wrong but it’s something you see first about people before you actually speak to them"
– LifeParty964
It's Not Hard To Be Kind
"Being mean to their kids. Not just losing your cool a bit, but when I hear people publicly call their own kids stupid, or swearing at them. I don’t think much of those people."
– asleepattheworld
"Also just the general use of profanity around your kids. I will secretly and visibly judge you for that."
– _From_dust
There's An Order!
"If they put milk in the bowl before the cereal"
– evilcj925
"Monsters like this exist?!"
– deer_riffs
Yeah, I would judge people for that too!
There's something about seeing a person litter that drives me up the wall. I remember being younger and being explicitly told to hold on to my trash and not just throw it in the street.
As a kid, I distinctly remember being made fun of for not just throwing the bag of chips I'd just eaten or an empty soda bottle into the gutter.
I can't imagine doing that. Why?! We truly treat this planet as if we have somewhere else to go. And yes, it says a lot about people who do that.
Turns out I'm not the only one with strongly held opinions. People shared their thoughts after Redditor Acrobatic_Western_67 asked the online community,
"What's something that makes you instantly dislike someone?"
"Treating food service..."
"Treating food service/retail employees like garbage for no reason."
SibyUnrest
This is a big one. Don't do it. It says a lot about you. The people who take your food orders are not personal servants.
"Standing in the middle of aisles..."
"Standing in the middle of aisles or doors, etc., and not paying attention to anyone else coming or needing to get through. Extra bonus scorn if you actually take a tone or give a dirty look when someone dares say 'excuse me.'"
llcucf80
Ah yes, spatial awareness. It's in such short supply.
"When they exhibit..."
"When they exhibit a personality trait that I also have, and don't like about myself. Every time I find myself being dismissive or judgemental of somebody, it's just my own insecurity."
At least you're self aware enough to recognize that, and that's a big step!
"When I'm talking..."
"When I'm talking and they are not listening. Like they are not even trying to pretend that they are listening."
eat-the-rich-07
Ah yes, the constant talker. Difficult to get a word in edgewise.
"A person can treat me like a princess..."
"A person can treat me like a princess but as soon as I see them mistreating either animals or people, I am out of there. Because one of these days, you'll be on that receiving end."
starlightradio
Honestly, good for you. You know when you've dodged a bullet.
"Telling people..."
"Telling people to smile. It just screams condescending and a lack of emotional intelligence."
Condescending indeed. I really felt for the women I worked with back when I did customer service. They heard it all the time and I could tell they hated it.
"Grown ups..."
"Grown ups using 'baby talk' to try to get what they want. I'm not talking about when people goo-goo at babies, but when they use a silly whiney voice to try to persuade people or make people do them a favour."
"Aww, pwease hewp me wiv dis wittle pwoject."
"When I hear that I instantly lose respect for that person, be it a stranger or someone I know."
"Pet peeve."
handsahwill
I cringed so hard reading this. I hope no one does that around me!
"When the first thing they do..."
"When the first thing they do when they meet me is talk bad about others. Probably to make me think they are great and it's the other people that are the problem."
TooGayToPayCash
Yeah... run away. Run far away. If they're talking like that when they first meet you
"Okay..."
"One-upping people. 'Yeah, that's pretty good, but one time I...' Okay, we get it, your life is more amazing than everyone else's."
well-uh-yeah
That's nothing! You should hear MY thoughts on what you just said!
See what I just did there?
"When out driving..."
"When out driving, someone who pulls out in front of you, then proceeds to go 5-10+ mph under the speed limit."
You just described a bunch of my family members. I apologize on their behalf.
It should go without saying, but I'll say it anyway: These sorts of behaviors are the kind that make other people think you're a jerk.
Don't be a jerk. Got it? Good.
Have some opinions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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People Explain Which Behaviors Scream 'Oh, You're THAT Kind Of Person'
We're told not to judge a book by its cover. But what about the first sentence?
To assess a person's character can take time. Often, only through extended exposure do we understand another individual's values, their traumas, their strenghts.
But there are some loaded behaviors--even little ones--that seem to cast relatively large shadows during that process.
Sometimes, a person commits an action or says something so loaded that we cannot help but form a broad opinion of them entirely.
sigurbodi91 asked, "What's a behaviour you can notice and think 'oh they're THAT kind of person?'"
Grasping for Power
"people who think someone working in retail/hospitality/restaurant industry/etc is inherently below them. infuriating." -- ImportantVegetable
"Before I went to law school, I was working a second job serving to save up some extra money. I had my bachelor's degree and worked a full time job at a well-respected trust company, just wanted the extra cash."
"The number of people who treated me like I was too stupid for a 'real job' was infuriating, but the stunned look of pure confusion when I told them about my 'day' job was priceless." -- pushing-up-daisies
Throwing Away Shame
"Littering. It just screams 'I don't give a sh** about my action's effect on other people' or 'I only think about myself'" -- DoctorBubbleButt
"BTW, cigarette butts count. Smokers I'm talking to you. Before you jump in with 'but I don't throw my butts on the ground' yes you do. All of you. I don't think I've ever seen one of you not throw your butt on the ground." -- thecarhole
Faceless is Still Human
"If you're mean to the person in the drive thru, you probably aren't a friendly person." -- cort_cort
"Agree. Or to the receptionist." -- bigjoffer
"Similar to that, getting mad at the employee for something that isn't working right or whatever. I feel so bad whenever my dad gets mad at an employee, I'm like dude they just work here, they can't control everything." -- icyangel2666
Nobody's Safe
"When they talk about someone else badly or share someone else's business. If they're gossiping about others, its only a matter of time before it's about me." -- tohellwithausername
"Came to write this."
"Also, it's the worst when they try to be subtle about it. It's almost like they want to gossip, but want you to be the one who initiates." -- OnCloudTen
On Full Display
"The Shopping Cart Theory"
"The shopping cart is the ultimate litmus test for whether a person is capable of self-governing. To return the shopping cart is an easy, convenient task and one which we all recognize as the correct, appropriate thing to do. To return the shopping cart is objectively right."
"There are no situations other than dire emergencies in which a person is not able to return their cart. Simultaneously, it is not illegal to abandon your shopping cart."
"Therefore the shopping cart presents itself as the apex example of whether a person will do what is right without being forced to do it."
"No one will punish you for not returning the shopping cart, no one will fine you or kill you for not returning the shopping cart, you gain nothing by returning the shopping cart."
"You must return the shopping cart out of the goodness of your own heart. You must return the shopping cart because it is the right thing to do. Because it is correct."
"A person who is unable to do this is no better than an animal, an absolute savage who can only be made to do what is right by threatening them with a law and the force that stands behind it."
"The Shopping Cart is what determines whether a person is a good or bad member of society."
-- LikeAPlane
Viewing Yourself Critically
"I once tried to interject while someone was telling a story (to encourage them and let them know I was on the same page) and he stopped his story completely and said 'Ohhhh you're one of those' (meaning an interrupter)."
"That was the first time I realized that I interrupt people and that it's rude (have since learned to mostly stay silent while listening)."
Waaaay Too Comfortable
"Talking on speaker phone or face time in public" -- No_Trust_5295
"Either inconsiderate or tech illiterate." -- SleepyFarts
"My mother does this.... Her excuse, 'My head gets tired from having the phone up to my ear.'"
"Just EXIT THE SHOP!" -- FuzzButtQuestion
Your Face Fly Is Down
"People who wear their mask below their nose" -- jmaple1
"Or below their mouth. The chin diaper." -- Qwerky1928
"It's more comfortable to wear it fully covering your mouth and nose." -- lovelybumpershoot
They Belong on Teachers' Desks and Nowhere Else
"People who buy Red Delicious apples are usually terrible people." -- done001100
"I always like to say 'at least half of the name is right' for those." -- derekg1000
"You've caught me, red handed." -- Charles_Whethers
"Seriously who is still buying these sh** apples? This isn't 1860 anymore you don't have to eat dirt." -- desertravenwy
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Children are a handful. You have to birth them, pay for them and then take care of them for decades. So one would think that would be grounds for some positive treatment. But kids can be cruel.
Whether they didn't mean it or not, children can cause a hit to their parents emotional psyche.
Redditor beardlesshipster reached out to the parents of Reddit asking... Parents of Reddit, what's something your kids do without realizing it hurts your feelings? Grab a drink moms and dads, you're not alone.