Reddit user ts_13_ asked:
"What’s a food you can’t buy because you will literally eat the entire thing in one sitting?"
Never. See. The. Cookies. Again.
But I don't feel bad about it, cause I'm absolutely not the only one out here with self control issues. Here are Reddit's snack confessions.
Serving Size
Tortilla Chips GIF by Salsarita's Fresh Mexican GrillGiphy"Chips."
"The larger size bags are a better value, but I almost always get a small bag. Why? Self-preservation."
"Regardless of how big the bag is, for me the serving size for chips is one bag."
- GrumpyCatStevens
"Same, can’t open a bag of chips/chip-like things (Doritos, Cheetos, etc.) without it being gone and me being full of shame."
"Crunchy, salty, and savory is a deadly combo for me."
- [Reddit]
"Same!"
"The routine is eat half the bag, lie to myself and save the other half for another day…an hour later eat the rest of the bag."
- Ill-Marionberry-9071
Literally Heaven
"Fresh warm French bread that just came out of the bakery"
- Original-Area-8739
"Dude fresh bread straight out the oven is literally heaven. I will eat an entire loaf, I’ve done it before and I'll do it again."
- ts_13_
"I bought a breadmaker at the beginning of the pandemic and man it is dangerous."
"The loaves aren't huge so you can just... eat one. Like a snack loaf."
- bartnet
Addictive Personalities
"Literally anything I slightly like"
"Yes, if I think 'damn these pickles are pretty good' there goes the whole jar PoP jut like that."
"Same with cookies, chips, anything."
- IReallyLiveCorn729
"This is me too."
"Not just cookies and chips and treats, but regular meals too. It's gotten to the point where I only cook bland things because if I make something that tastes good I'll want to eat 3 or 4 helpings that night."
- sedimentary-j
"Most snacks really. I don't have a sensible relationship with food."
- [Reddit]
The Brown Dragon
Happy Get Down GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"Cereal! Omg it’s bad. Specifically Cinnamon Toast Crunch (regular or the churro kind)"
- StreetNext5958
"Someone brought in popcorn at work the other day. All sorts of 'gourmet' versions. One was Cinnamon and Sugar."
"It tasted EXACTLY like Cinnamon Toast Crunch."
"I killed the whole bag. Now I'm shaking. I need more. I'm chasing the brown dragon."
- Element1977
"Omg here in Texas, HEB sells horchata-flavored Rice Krispies. First it was Cinnamon Toast Crunch then it was the churros...now it's these."
"Canela es vida"
- MephistoTheHater
A Fascination With The Frozen
"Popsicles."
"Not the fancy ones, that 3 dollar bag of 24 twin pops. Had my girlfriend come home and see the side table by the couch full of sticks and just shake her head in disappointment at me."
"It's a childhood addiction I'll never shake, I guess."
- kira7setsuna
"One day an old roommate bought a 48 box of ice cream sandwiches then went to the gym."
"By the time he got home I only managed to save him two."
- amplesamurai
"I like to eat all the colors and leave the grape ones , then eat the grape ones repeatedly until my entire mouth has frost bite."
"I've had to go to ER three times because of it and have given myself nerve damage."
- abitheshark
An Animal
"White cheddar popcorn... I turn into an animal"
- Legitimate_Duck6090
"Same. My sister has a video tucked away of me emptying a bag of white cheddar popcorn into my mouth at a stop light while driving. She made sure my husband saw it before we got married."
- Signal-Block-1797
"The amount of SmartFood family-sized bags that I have singlehandedly torn to shreds…"
- SnekBills
More Animals
Hungry John Krasinski GIF by The Animal Crackers MovieGiphy"Circus Animal cookies with the pink and white frosting."
- FecusTPeekusberg
"If surveyed, I wouldn't even say I liked them and it never occurs to me to buy them. But if they're around, get out of my way!"
- LordPizzaParty
"Have you tried them frozen? Discovered it by accident when I was staying in a place with no AC, and haven’t looked back since"
- HalloIchBinToad
ADHD Obsessions
"Anything I like. I have ADHD and no self control"
- goyourownwayy
"I have ADHD and I obsess over food too! Will eat the same thing for days until I don't like it anymore."
- jellie_99
"The lack of self control is actually the worst."
"I binge food, alcohol, people, until I’ve f*cked up my body, my relationship, my job, or whatever else."
- PinealPunch
Hidden In The Toilet
"Peanut Butter."
"If it's in the house, it CALLS to me, and I am drawn to it like a Siren from Greek mythology."
"When my partner wants to have PB in the house, she literally has to hide it from me. And I've found it a few times, so she has to get REALLY CLEVER every time she gets a new container."
"Last time she hid it in the toilet tank, and I found it because I had to repair the flapper device and found it in there."
- whomp1970
"I found my people. Can’t have it in the house. I will throw it away to save myself from myself."
"Everyone close to me knows it too, cuz I’ll announce it."
"No, no, no, get it out. I won’t stop eating it until it’s gone."
- mach1130
Easter Emergencies
crab GIF by OriginalsGiphy"I made myself sick on Easter because I ate what turned out to be 11 crab rangoons in one sitting."
"I'm lactose intolerant. They're full of cream cheese."
"Worth it."
- graccha
"I'm allergic to seafood and I am addicted to them. Luckily they're usually made with fake crab..."
- alexopaedia
Delicious Bread
michael cera bread GIFGiphy"Garlic bread"
- turboultra
"For years, I thought I really liked pasta. But no. It was merely an excuse for the garlic bread."
- eleanor61
" 'Garlic bread is my favorite food. I could honestly eat it for every meal. Or just eat it all the time without even stopping.' — Scott Pilgrim"
- femme_phoenix
"Most addictive substance on Earth hands down"
- Mrs_PigeonPantsago
"I came here to say this."
- haloarh
Oh Oh Black Berry...
"Black berries. I mean, I buy them anyway, but those fuckers are gone once I get my hands on them"
- ClicheRasin
"I tried the Sweet Karoline variety last year and damn if they didn't taste like the ones from my grandparents' yard! Ate a pound over three days, then bought more. Half woman, half berry by the end of the week."
- Jules_Noctambule
"At least those are kinda healthy…"
- ts_13_
"Thus why I still buy them"
- ClicheRasin
Dangerous Little Egg
Cadbury Creme Egg Cat GIFGiphy"Cadbury mini eggs , they're very crack-adjacent"
- ramz86
"Just reading the name makes my teeth hurt."
"I actually cried one time because I felt so sick from eating too many of them but couldn't stop until the bag was empty. And I was a grown ass adult mom of 4."
"I'm very sad I haven't had any this year."
- dedoubt
"I have found my person. Those things hit so f*cking hard."
- Sorcererstoned
"Crackbury mini eggs"
- r4d1ant
Cheese It Is
"Cheez Its"
- Kailua3000
"Yup, and they make me feel so sh*tty afterwards too."
- YCSMD
"thanks for reminding me, i need to get some cheezits"
- dacoobob
"They are a real treat for me. I don’t buy them often because rare for a box to last longer than 24 hours in my house. It’s just me eating them."
"The other night I had cheezits and wine for dinner and I just can’t do that anymore."
- notstephanie
"Same here. I quit buying those a long time ago…I would sometimes open the box while driving and half the box would be gone by the time I got home."
- crazydoc2008
"Oh I know that feeling lol. 'Let's see how much I got lef-'."
"SHAKE SHAKE"
"Oh no..."
- Kailua3000
Chinese Take Out
Giphy"Cheap Chinese food that loads up those styrofoam containers."
- ALargeChip
"The more you are left wondering how the place passed their inspection the better it tastes. A place on my way back from work somehow managed to get like a 95 or 96 and has the absolute best honey chicken I've ever had (I'm a sucker for sweet stuff)."
"It's also incredibly cheap. I used to get more than I can eat for like $7 and they only recently increased to around $9. I tip them very well because that stuff is delicious and is worth more than they charge.
- demonmonkey89
"I will eat any/all Pork Fried Rice put in front of me no matter what."
"Its gotta be the sh*tty Americanized version though, the worse it is the better."
- fistymcbuttpuncher
The Name Doesn't Help
"Muddy Buddies. I will devour an entire bag of these like a gluttonous pig"
- rf8350
"My mom makes it homemade and gives me a gallon bag of it every Christmas. It’s usually gone by the 27th."
- JesusWasAUnicorn
"I call that puppy chow over here, but yes very addictive"
- ts_13_
"Crack, I tell you."
- FrenchMartinez
"You should make them yourself even better tasting"
- One-Reveal-2297
Za Time
hungry pizza time GIFGiphy"PIZZAAAAAAAAA"
- [Reddit]
"Me: I'll just eat half so I have some left overs for tomorrow!"
"Why do I lie to myself? I know I'm gonna eat the whole thing..."
- ChaplnGrillSgt
"Seriously."
"You never feel full on pizza until you finish the entire thing lol"
- Tom38
"Im into fitness..."
"... fitness whole pizza in my mouth!"
- Raptoot83
"Just ate an entire pizza today. Granted it was super thin and probably really 2-3 slices in real pizza terms lol instead of the tiny 8 thin slices I had but still, it was a lot and I had zero self control. Zero"
- Sublime_Dino
Scouts Secret Recipe
Tim Curry Cookie GIF by Extreme ImprovGiphy"Girl Scout cookies. Have to buy two boxes bc one of them will not make it out of the parking lot."
- dkstr419
"Thin mints and a quart of milk. Isn’t a sleeve 1 serving?"
- chonks1985
"well, to be fair, they're only a single serving box"
- chileheadd
"Tagalongs you open a box and it’s empty."
"Every damn time"
"A box lasts 10 minutes once it has been opened"
- satanmat2
"The shortbread cookies could kill my entire family and I’d still come back 😩"
- [Reddit]
Fancy Cheese With Fancy Bread
"BRIE AND BAGUETTE"
- ACcatlady
"muffled sounds of sandwichy enjoyment"
- DRGHumanResources
"Brie, fresh baguette and fig or pear preserve is an even superior combo!!"
- meriboo
"One summer I spent six weeks camping around Humboldt County."
"Baguette, brie, smoked salmon, red wine. Pretty much every night. I regret nothing."
- fuck_huffman
"This was dinner in our household tonight! No words spoken about…we just silently demolished it and understood it was dinner."
"For dessert we added peach jelly."
- seoDenOsA
Alright foodies, you're up.
Go ahead and confess your snack sins. You're clearly among friends here.
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In a way, pineapple on pizza is kind of a hero...
Reddit user CertifiedAnus asked:
"What single ingredient spoils an entire food dish for you if it’s included?"
Infused With Death
"Warm something up with radish, which is good raw, and it will infuse the food with the taste of death."- RenegadeMare
"Cooked radish is one of the worst things ever."
"I once made roasted radishes as a roasted potatoes substitute."
"That was a big nope."
"Worse than doing cauliflower substitutes."- [Reddit]
Schitts Creek Comedy GIF by CBCGiphyCoconut Eggs?
"When whoever you're with makes breakfast using coconut oil."
"Coconut flavored eggs, or bacon anyone?"- c1nut
"Shortly after I got married, my wife, who is nooooooot skilled in the kitchen, wanted to surprise me and make breakfast."
"I woke up and she started cooking. I took a bite of the eggs and froze, fork in my mouth, eyes bugged out… just… frozen."
"She’s looking at me, big smiles, asking 'how is it?!?!' All excited but self conscious."
"She had READ somewhere about putting some milk into scrambled eggs, so she decided to try it."
"Unfortunately, she used whatever milk we had, which was coconut vanilla flavored almond milk… in the scrambled eggs."
"It was one of the most disgusting things I ever forced myself to smile and cringingly eat. But I did.,"
"Coconut vanilla almond eggs. Lol"- Hot_X7
Soap Plant!
"Coriander! Cilantro? I'm Aussie so we just call it Coriander."- 0ChillPterodactyl
"I'll say it again SOAPPLANT."- Queenof-brokenhearts
"Fucking cilantro."- Platypus_life_
Please Stop
"Jello."
"Might be a white person thing, but at every single family gathering I’ve went to there was some kind of dessert that would’ve been great if jello wasn’t added."
"Can we please stop adding jello?"
"They always f*cking add the jello."
"Not even the good kind either, always the worst flavors."
"What the f*ck is a 'jello salad'?"
Why does a 'jello salad' exist in the first place?? Nobody ever touched the jello salad."
"That never stops them from making it though."
"Year after year family gatherings were tainted with my disgust for jello salad."
"I stopped going to family gatherings a few years back. I couldn’t take the unbearable encounters with the cursed dessert any longer."- juulululia
Scared Jurassic Park GIF by VidiotsGiphyTasting Beige
"Miracle Whip."
" 'Sandwich kicking flavor' my a**."
More like sweet-ish and bland."
"Like tasting beige."- 14braincells
Stringy Water
"Celery."
"Never in my life have I had a craving for crunchy, stringy water."- Hrekires
Christmas Medicine
"Cloves."
"It gives food a medicinal taste."- toothbelt
Fresh Prince Of Bel Air Dance GIFGiphy10 Years of Trauma
"Avocado."
"My wife once asked me if I liked Avocado shortly after we were married."
"Sure, I guess I do."
"So it soon became part of of dinners."
"A lot. Too much."
"SOOO much that even sprinkled with lemon juice, it soon became unbearable."
"To this day- 10 years later, I can't do anything with Avocado in it."- 35242
A Peeling Sticker Sound
"Blue Cheese."
"Especially because it comes pretty regularly on top of stuff I didn't ask for it on."
"On salads, on sandwiches, on steaks, with chicken wings...ugh."
"I had a leather jacket in that got moldy because of humidity in the back of the closet. It got so moldy that it stuck to the wall, and made a 'peeling sticker' sound when I peeled it off the wall."
"Blue cheese smells like that did."- NecroJoe
It Just Spreads
"Olives."
"The devils grape."- johngannon8
Emma Thompson Chewing GIF by Walt Disney StudiosGiphyBread Doesn't Make Everything Better
"Wheat anything (gluten)."-snarcasm68
So Bitter!
"Star anise is terrible! "
"I have a hard time with dill too."_
Let The Flavors Speak For Themselves
"Any condiment besides mayo in the context of chicken strips, chicken sandwiches, and french fries."- AsrielzardYT
Rainbow 3D GIF by BadBenjaminGiphyAvoid Food Which Makes You Cry.
"Onions."
"Specifically if they are chopped up."
"I don’t wanna be munching on my rice and feel something slimy slide across my tongue."
"But i will eat onion rings any day."- Funny_Maybe126
"Raw onion."
"It just over powers a dish if you use too much."
"Green onion is fine, but any other, and all I'm gonna taste is the onion if it's not a very minimal amount."- moderndaygypsy13
Quite The Combo
"Boiled eggs and wasabi."
"I'm not eating that sh*t no."- Issa_Queen11
Grind It Up...
"Pepper corn."
"My friends and I used to have an awful roommate."
"One friend was our main cook and he would constantly take over the cooking."
"I hated it."
"One day he wanted to cook us a dish."
"Our cook friend kept telling him EVERYTHING he's putting in the dish we can't or won't eat."
"He brushes her off insisting we just need it 'cooked right'."
"So he made us some steak,, I cant eat beef I get stomach problems, with under cooked onions, friends hate the crunch, and loaded each steak with pepper corn."
"The angry suprised Pikachu face he had when I scrapped all the kernels off and maybe nibbled on the steak."
"We warned him."
"It also tasted bad."- LemonyMercury
Sunburnt Grapes...
"Raisins should only ever be used in certain cake or cookie recipes."
"Keep raisins out of everything else."- PunchBeard
Alright, you've heard the hard limits on these Redditors menus, but now we want to know what ingredient you hate.
We've all got one, don't be shy about it. What totally turns you off when it touches your tongue?
Reddit user centstwo asked:
"What's your go-to lazy meal?"
Not only do I feel better about the whole grazing thing, but I'm taking notes on some of these people's ideas. All I'm seeing here are time saving tips.
On Deck
Rainbow Pizza GIFGiphy"I keep a cheap frozen pizza on deck for the laziest of meals."
"I just get the 3 meat pizza and add whatever shredded cheese I have on hand before I pop it in."
- ADamnTroll2
"We call this the 'emergency pizza' in my house."
- MultiPass21
"I do this, or rather I intend to do this."
"Unfortunately I end up eating them because I want to eat them, and not when I'm feeling lazy."
- nonresponsive
"Get yourself a pizza stone, you will not regret it."
- farlos75
Store Spätzle
"Lentils with Spätzle (traditional german noodle made from eggs) - store-bought."
"I'm sadly not one of those who can afford making anything from scratch. But on the other hand I think spätzle are pretty much the easiest type of pasta to make from scratch."
- Tschnitzl-sama
Your Melty Majesty
"Grilled cheese sandwich"
- NorthernRoost
"Or a quesadilla, depending whether bread or tortilla are closer to hand."
- Porrick
"With Tomato Soup."
- rufev
"Add ham"
- Fubared259
"That's not a grilled cheese, that's a melt."
- agreeingstorm9
True Laziness
frozen anna sleeping GIFGiphy"Sleep. True laziness is being too lazy to even eat."
- Kind-Replacement5788
"I used to not know if I was more tired or hungry. So I would make a hot dog, eat it in bed and fall asleep."
- estherober
"Coffee will take the hunger edge off, too. Gonna go do that now since I’m too lazy to eat."
- mashtartz
"If you’re tired and hungry…. Staying awake to eat you’ll still be tired. Go to sleep and you won’t be hungry."
"Residency with a toddler pro tips- sleep always wins"
- Mxhashim
Cereal Snacking
"Honey Nut Cheerios."
"I eat the entire box in bed with a box fan running."
- CPOP1-slash-CPOP0
"Cinnamon Toast Crunch, in a red solo cup, covered with milk. No spoon necessary."
- Iamjimmym
"I like the regular Cheerios but I add my own honey if I’m having it with milk, and if no milk can eat it with my hands without honey and without getting sticky."
- gahiolo
Breakfast
"Scrambled eggs and cheese wrapped in a warm tortilla"
- Relative-Language-55
"This is my breakfast lmao"
- Marble____
"This is the correct answer."
- little_mushroom_
"Ha - made this for myself, husband, and and oldest child just today for lunch. Good stuff, yo."
- MagpieMandible
Nothing On It, Nothing In It
"Hawaiian Bread, nothing on it, nothing with it, just bread."
- -bonkbonk-
"As a kid I would sneak and eat them just plain. Hits the spot."
- OklahomaIsWhere86
"My 2 year old son watched me eat a whole bag one day."
"Now it's his favorite snack and he cries for it like you'd expect a toddler to cry for sweets."
- No-Smoke3180
Jazz It Up
bam yes GIFGiphy"There is a nearby supermarket that sells smoked shredded pork. When you get it home its cold and not very good, so what I do is fry it in a pan with diced onions + garlic. It is delicious and takes like 4 minutes to make."
"There are these delicious challah buns I used, but they keep catching on fire in the toaster."
- ooo-ooo-oooyea
It Just Keeps Getting Worse
"Hotdogs. Like sad hotdogs"
"Out the can into boiling water and the bun is put in the microwave for 10secs then just a little bit of sauce."
"Yes, I said can. Ye Olde Oak brand."
"I'm a Brit to make this whole hot dog situation worse."
- RedRoodle27
"Can!?!?"
- Alright_Hamilton
"Chips?"
"Pepperoni chips."
"Line a plate with paper towels. Cover the plate in pepperonis, while they’re only partly overlapping."
"Put in microwave for 2-2 1/2 mins."
- jscncfl
Now that you've heard from the chefs of Reddit, it's your turn. What's your go-to meal for when serious cooking is too much to ask?
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