New experiences are the spice of life, but sometimes that spice might be a little more bitter than you originally thought.
Whether the experience turned out to be a total flop, or it was the kind of thing that you're glad you got to do once but don't need to do again, some things are best left as one-off experiences.
*Content note: the following article contains graphic descriptions of injuries, and mentions drug use. Reader discretion advised.*
Reddit user CaneToDefeatYou asked:
Always Swim Parallel To The Shore
Not paying attention to currents when swimming in the sea (and going anyway when there's a red flag and no guard)
Dumbest sh*t ever. I was with my two brothers and my father, happily splashing around. Suddenly we turn around and the shore just got very far away. So we start swimming back but the sea is stronger than you. If you stop 5 seconds to catch your breath you lose the progress you did during the last minute, and that's precious.
I was young so I don't remember it as a legit life-threatening situation, but my bros and dad still got chills when talking about it
It Technically Worked?
Put pizza wrapped in foil in the microwave when I was 10 thinking it will warm up quicker. It surely did by lighting on fire 3 seconds after I turned it on
Maybe Stay Out Of Caves
Spelunking / cave exploring. For starters, it begins and ends with going through a million bats. And the journey in between is just too dangerous, in the last place in the world you'd want to get hurt. And super tight squeezes are freaky.
the story of the guy who got stuck upside down in the Nutty Putty cave system will have me never ever getting into spelunking. his body is still stuck there because it was too unsafe and difficult to get him out. it's so disturbing and sad.
Every single time cave exploration or spelunking is mentioned on Reddit, the Nutty Putty cave gets mentioned. And for good reason.
Hard pass. Not a fan of being eaten by the planet.
Climb Of A Lifetime
Climbed the stairs up the CN Tower. It's a twice a year thing for charity. My friends and husband were all like "Yeah, come join us! It's so fun!!"
No, 144 flights of stairs is not fun. I've done it once. It's crossed off. Never again.
Edit: okay, it's "only" 144 flights of stairs, and 1776 steps. Sure felt like a billion, but this post has gotten some traction and I feel guilty.
Accidental Theft Is Surprisingly Common
This one time I was getting a drink that was only for a dollar, so I sped-walk my way into the mini shops, quickly grabbed one and ran out. I was running to my friend with the drink until I felt something in my pocket, pulled it out and it was the dollar...
I quickly ran back to the mini shop to see the shop owners scanning the outside of their shop, I gave them my dollar and said "Sorry", they looked at the dollar, looked at each other, spoke in a different language, and went back inside.
I'm pretty sure they called me an idiot, as I went back with shame.
My dad told me this story. In the 70s he and my mum stopped at a Little Chef (motorway services restaurant) for lunch. After they finished, they got the bill, then left. They drove for half an hour before realising, they didn't actually pay the bill.
Being honest people, they turned round and went back and paid. The staff said "We though you'd be back".
In the days before pre pay gas pumps my buddy and I stopped at a station to fill some jugs up with 100 something octane race gas before heading to the drag strip. We forgot to pay. About a half hour later we were sitting in the pit area getting the car ready when a sheriffs deputy rolls up and told us. Both of us thought the other had paid. Whoops. He gave me a ride back to the station and I paid and bought pops for everyone including the deputy. He hung out with us for a while at the track. Felt dumb.
Let's Stick To Proper Toilet Paper
Ran out of toilet paper when i was 11, saw alcohol wipe cloths and thought that would work just fine... nope, as soon as I did that first wipe it was as if the sun teleported into my a**hole and i was hopping around the bathroom trying not to squeal. Mom opened the door to check on the noise and saw me jumping around with an alcohol pad between my cheeks.
Keep alcohol away from your anus.
These Conspiracy Theories Are Easy to Debunk | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Jungles Aren't As Fun As They Look
Hiking through jungles. They look so beautiful in movies. In reality they are some of the most brutal hikes I've been on.
Let's start with the humidity. It's so bad it drenches you to the bone, and there's no escaping it. Being under a jungle canopy is like being in a pressure cooker. The heat and humidity beats you down harder than any environment I've been in.
Then there's the swarms of biting bugs. From never-ending mosquitoes, giant spiders on everything, ticks jumpung on you from everywhere and colonies of aggressive fire ants criss-crossing the trails, you can expect to have more bug bites than you've thought possible to survive.
Once-in-a-lifetime Was Enough
Went to Times Square for New Years Eve in New York City. I live in NYC and I figured it was the kinda thing I wanted to see but didn’t need to see again. Went in 2000 when I was 18. Got there 11am and stayed for 13 hours in the freezing cold but with close spots to the ball drop and screen. I’m glad I did it. I’m also glad I’ve never done it again.
Peer Pressure Sucks
Did heroin for the first time and wasn't into the sensation at all. The same roomate that talked me into herion talked me into smoking some crack to even out. Luckily I wasn't a fan of either and never did either ever again.
Sometimes It's Just Not Worth It
Removing paint from a table. I still need to finish sanding the thing but that was a nightmare, who paints a table with like 30 coats??
Edit: Used Citristrip Safer Paint Remover, then scraped the flat surfaces with a scraper, then used steel wool on the other parts, rinsing the chunks of paint off in between as it gunked up the steel wool real quick. Then repeated the process a few weeks later, then used a belt sander on the flat surfaces, now just need to hand sand the other surfaces.... It's like you want to quit but you are too invested at that point.
Beware The Bar Brawls
Tried to intervene during a street fight. Got shot for my troubles.
Was at the bar with my ex wife. Two regulars (one of which I considered a friend) started arguing. My friend went outside to go home and end the problem. A**hat decides hes gonna continue the fight in the parking lot. There was a group of us that followed and when he went to pull A gun my drunk a** thought it would be a good idea to step in and try to stop it all. F**ker shot at me three times. One of then hit my leg.
Yeah... still not good enough reason to try it a second time.
Running In The Desert Sounds Like A Bad Time
A marathon in the desert.
Do you try to find new ways to die every day?
Well I'm an epileptic with brain cancer who still cooks.
Can't Lose Money If You Don't Play
Bought a $20 lottery ticket.
Shoplifting Is Maybe Not The Best Idea
I stole a tester eyeliner from the makeup section at a store when I was 17. The security guy took me aside in a small room and "questioned" me, asked for my information, and to scare me, he said this would always be in my record and companies won't want to hire me anymore and I burst into tears and had a panic attack. He said he'll let me off if I pay double the price of the eyeliner, so I did and he let me go.
Now, I don't know how much of what he told me was real and if the resolve was legitimate, but if he tried to just scare me into not becoming a serial swiper, it worked.
Pretty sure he just pocketed the cash after.
Hot Things Are Hot!
Grabbed the hot grill as a 5 year old. Learned my lesson.
Put my face on a just unplugged iron.
This is my earliest memory. I was younger than 4. My mother was ironing the clothes and i was in the same room. She finished, unplugged the iron and left the room for a second. I was curious how hot it was so i went to check it. Why with my face? Because whenever i had a fever my mother used to check if i had a temperature by putting her cheeky against my forehead and well... Monkey see monkey do.
Wrong Kind Of Lube
When i was 14, i accidentally mistook bike chain lube for sex lube. At first, i wondered why it was blue, but that thought was almost immediately overpowered by an intense burning sensation.
Definitely Not Avocado
Asume the green stuff on the sushi tray was avocado...
More Like Bed And Social Anxiety
Stayed at a bed and breakfast. I’m not social enough to socialize with people during breakfast.
Same. Came downstairs at 9:15 because they said breakfast was served until 9:30. The owner said, "there you are!" and showed me to a table with a little card that said Mrs. Whinecube (in fancy script) and then proceeded to scold me that all the other guests were already done eating.
Why Do So Many Kids Do This?
One time (I was around 12 or 13?) I suddenly took interest on my sharpener, since my pinky finger was small enough I decided why don't I sharpen my finger? Like why the f**k not?? So I plunged it in and twisted (hard). Took nearly a week to heal.
One of the most stupidest things I ever done
I did this as a kid too, it’s like some sort of whack childhood intrusive thought that you actually act on.
It's often good to try new things and get out of your comfort zone, but it's perfectly okay to head right back to that comfort zone immediately afterwards.
The market of product delivery is a fickle, sometimes senseless beast. There have been so many fads, inventions and ideas that everyone was sure would revolutionize the world. Moments of creative advertising and strategic planning and unveiling go into the perfect introduction. The budgets are blown are cash is thrown.
The heralding of something new and innovative is trumpeted. The hype is big and the anticipation high. Then every once in a while... THUD! What was to be the next big thing is the next big floppy disaster.
Redditor u/MexPoosyConoisseur wanted to compare notes on the items that left us disappointed, by asking:
What was hugely hyped up but flopped?
In my medium of art (film/tv/theatre/literature) the hype/flop game is the norm more times than we care to admit. Sending art to the masses is always a gamble. And every gamble has a loser.
I'll do Diet!90s 1990s GIF by PepsiGiphy
"When the Segway came out I remember an expert on Good Morning America saying that they would design cities around it in the future, instead of cars. Before it was called a Segway it was referred to as 'the thing' and new information about it was treated like freaking nuclear codes."
It's a Negative....
"Google+. It stayed in invitation only phase for way too long. By the time it was open to everyone, people forgot about it and it flopped."
"They also forced you to use it if you had any other kind of google account so people naturally resisted it. What they didn't understand is that people use other social media websites if they have something unique to offer. Unfortunately now it seems like every social media site is copycatting each other."
"I still remember 3D TVs were supposed to be the next "technological leap" or something. Even the World Cup was broadcasted in 3D. Then it just died out."
"Not just TV, but that era where every movie had a 3D version in theatres. As someone who wore glasses and is nearsighted, I was never able to watch them."
Yeah I gave up on cat toys early on, and dog toys. My dogs have never really been into stuffed animals, or squeaky balls. Thank God. And I always thought the Segway was weird and unstable.
Bad MovesTaylor Kitsch What GIFGiphy
"The Nivelle Offensive It was hyped to win WW1 for France in 48 hours. Instead it was so bad that it started a mutiny, got Nivelle fired, and had casualty numbers an order of magnitude higher than expected."
"Atkins diet-esque food items at fast food restaurants in like 2008 or whatever it was. They came and they went like the wind I remember KFC tried to get in the game at the time by claiming their chicken was healthy because it was low in carbs. That went down like a lead balloon."
"Juicero. The ultimate culmination of unicorn companies that make no sense."
"It was partially bankrolled by GOOGLE and I heard that people speculated that the DRM thing it had was so Google could harvest user data. That's gotta be the dumbest way to do that ever why would Google care about people's organic glorified juice box preferences."
"Ooooh. When I read that word, it rang a bell so I looked it up. I remember seeing advertisements for that thing. I think I remember seeing a video of someone opening up their packets and showing it was just... A mush. That you pressed to get a drink out of."
Not so Slender...
"The 2018 Slender Man movie... I remember before it came out it had like a 92% want to see on rotten tomatoes after it came out it got a 17% liked it."
"Honestly the movie shouldn't have been PG13. An R rating (which as far as I know was actually the original focus) would've been much better, as then the movie would've been more like the creepypasta and not like a child's fanfiction. It sucks the R rating was cut but "wOUlD sOMeOnE tHiNK oF tHE ChIlDrEN?????????????"
Foreigners Explain Which Parts Of American Culture Seem Strange | George Takei’s Oh MyyyAmerica, land of the free... and oversized portions and cars. That's how the saying goes, right? There are some baffling quirks about the United States. That...
The Huntgeraldo rivera man GIF by South Park Giphy
"Geraldo Rivera's special Mystery of Al Capone's vault in the 1980s. 💩"
"That David Copperfield special where he "made the statue of liberty disappear." Forget that crap."
"If I remember correctly, the camera and the bleachers with the audience were on a stabilized platform. They just trucked both a few feet to the side until the statue was out of camera shot, then pulled back the curtain."
"The dark universe (the mummy)."
"To this day I cannot believe it even got that much hype and money during the kickstarter campaign. Even in the initial pitch it didn't seem that impressive or interesting so thankfully, I decided to wait until it was out. Never ended up buying one, obviously."
Let me see...
"I remember google glasses were supposed to be the next big thing but let me tell you I haven't seen a single pair out in the wild."
"I think Google got a big whiff of the vast majority of the population being really mad that people could film with the glasses without anyone ever knowing. I think it scared them off. People did not want this, and there were many people who seemed ready to fight people who wore these glasses."
Keep your baby...
"TY beanie babies. Everyone thought they were going to be rich when I was in high school."
"I put a new coat of some all-weather sealant on this lady's playground set for her little kids. I was 13, it was summer, got, and she asked my dad if I could help her out. 6 hours later, she pays me with one single beanie baby. "This is gonna be worth a lot of money one day. Your afternoon of work has made you rich as an adult." Freaking bullcrap."
"Is anything happening?"
"The end of the world in 2012."
"My cousin texted my the day that we were all supposed to die. She said "is anything happening?" And I was like "what do you mean? No. Nothing is happening" she really said "oh, well you live in a time zone ahead of us by 2 hours. I thought stuff would happen over there on the east coast first." I freaking died. The thought of the world imploding on itself but still following time zones is fantastic."
"Quibi. That streaming service with nothing over 10 minutes. Launched about 3 weeks after the world shutdown."
Oh GarthCountry Music 2018 Cmas GIF by CMA AwardsGiphy
"In the life of Chris Gaines. The project where Garth Brooks created a grunge icon that would premiere in a movie."
"Fyre Festival is the ultimate "hyped but flopped". It's a cautionary tale of what NOT to do when organizing and/or promoting something."
"It's really just a cautionary tale not to scam people. It's organization and promotion worked totally efficiently, but it was a scam from start to end. Otherwise it wouldn't have worked and we wouldn't be talking about it today."
Well on paper they all sounded like good ideas. Maybe the issue lies in the execution. Try again perhaps? Except Slender Man and Geraldo. No, just no.
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A daft driver was left with a huge hole in the side of his car after fitting it with the wrong size door.
Robert Woods, 33, spent three hours replacing a broken door on his Peugeot 206 before realizing the new door he had replaced it with was a foot too small.
Newly qualified driver, Robert, tried to save himself some cash by fitting a brand new passenger side door himself because the old one had a faulty wind-up window.
Robert Woods / SWNS
He said he even went to a specialist Peugeot parts dealer, back in May 2017 when the ordeal happened, to source the right part.
But Robert somehow managed to walk away with a door for a five-door model rather than his three-door version of the car.
And when he came to replace the broken door with the brand new one, father-of-two Robert said he was baffled to see the "massive gap."
Robert has said ever since the blunder his mates have poked jokes - forcing him to sell his beloved motor.
Robert Woods / SWNS
Robert, from Manchester, England, said:
"I didn't realize it was too small until right at the very end. It took me three hours to do. I shut the door after fitting it and started to walk away."
"But I didn't hear it click so I turned around. I noticed this massive hole in the side of the car."
"I was baffled but realized straight away what had happened. I felt really daft but saw the funny side by the end of it."
"I sold the car not long after. Every time I picked a mate up in my car they'd make jokes about it. I haven't heard the end of it since it happened."
Robert, who lived in Blackburn at the time, passed his test in May 2017 and parted with £600 (~$780) to pick the Peugeot as a "cheap runaround" to get him on the road.
But after making the purchase he soon realized the passenger side window would not wind down and was completely broken.
Robert got a quote for £60 (~$78) to fix the window but he said he soon worked out it would be cheaper to buy a new door all together and fit it himself.
He thought he managed to find himself a quick and easy replacement door for just £30 (~$39) from a local garage specializing in Peugeot car parts.
Robert Woods / SWNS
Robert, a courier driver, said:
"The window wouldn't wind up and it was cheaper to just get a new door. I went along to pick this new door up and the color was bang on. The guy in the warehouse said it would fit my three-door model."
"I thought I was quids in and was saving a bit of money. All I had to do to replace it was take out two bolts and disconnect the wiring."
"A friend helped me replace it and it was quite straightforward. We reconnected everything and to begin with I was quite pleased with myself. But then I closed the door and noticed what had happened."
Robert, who has a partner, Sarah Donohue, 33, said he didn't bother trying to replace the door for a second time and continued to drive the car with the broken window.
Robert Woods / SWNS
He added ever since the incident his friends have made fun of him.
The torments got so bad that Robert sold the car later the same year after growing sick and tired of being laughed at, he said.
"Every time I went somewhere in the car someone would say something or make a joke."
Former firefighter Robert now drives an Audi A3 and said he can now fix most mechanical problems, but still hasn't dared to replace another car door.
Guy Advises Men To Keep A 'Lady Drawer' For Guests, But People Can't Get Over The Bizarre Items In His Own Drawer
A male Twitter user's attempt at accommodating his female guests is turning heads for all the wrong reasons.
Twitter user @DaddyAllDay recently shared his bro tip of keeping a "lady drawer"—but the contents of his own drawer drew ire and confusion from actual females.
I feel like every guy needs a “lady drawer” if you plan on having frequent guests. https://t.co/wgjExZOlIt— ClawDaddy BLM (@ClawDaddy BLM)1578783016.0
The controversial tweet reads:
"I feel like every guy needs a 'lady drawer' if you plan on having frequent guests."
Included was a picture of his own drawer- filled with strange items that may or may not be helpful to women.
While the drawer did have some useful things, such as tampons and pads, it also includes an open pregnancy test, two bottles of nail polish remover and a dildo.
While the sentiment is kind, sort of, the contents of this drawer are truly bizarre, and weirdly sexist. Women aren't all the same—and definitely don't want to share certain items with or even be reminded of the women before them.
@DaddyAllDay, who lists his name as BassFather, wrote a follow up Tweet.
"For the record, I'm not saying to go buy all this sh*t. You really just need makeup wipes, tampons, hair ties, and a hair brush. I just had all that laying round so I designated a drawer for it."
For the record, I’m not saying to go buy all this shit. You really just need makeup wipes, tampons, hair ties, and… https://t.co/Xen0ZKdUFH— ClawDaddy BLM (@ClawDaddy BLM)1578807354.0
Plenty of Twitter users replied to the man's tweet with pure confusion.
@DaddyAllDay Imagine using the same brush as other random females.. that’s disgusting— . (@.)1579039585.0
@DaddyAllDay yes, because women love being reminded of all the women who were there before us— marisa ronis (@marisa ronis)1579116667.0
@DaddyAllDay Nothing makes a girl feel more warm and fuzzy about a guy than being told she's welcome to the feminin… https://t.co/Istdps8XfL— debbie...(just sayin') (@debbie...(just sayin'))1579237276.0
@DaddyAllDay Honestly, no one needs to be sharing hair brushes. They probably have their own anyway. But, no one… https://t.co/Fe6WR96M6c— Pat 🌊🌊🌊🌻🌻🌟🌟🌊🌊🦉🦉🌺🌺🌴 (@Pat 🌊🌊🌊🌻🌻🌟🌟🌊🌊🦉🦉🌺🌺🌴)1579232104.0
Others capitalized on the Tweet, turning it into a meme.
I feel like every guy needs to have a “lady drawer” if they plan on having frequent guests https://t.co/qb72R4xwaL— Carol (@Carol)1579142542.0
I feel like every guy needs a “lady drawer” if you plan on having frequent guests. https://t.co/AA7elsNOIw— but doctor, i am (@but doctor, i am)1579147046.0
I feel like every girl needs a “fella drawer” if you plan on having frequent guests. https://t.co/fMyLZ2sWMm— faith🦕 (@faith🦕)1579141374.0
I feel like every guy needs a “lady drawer” if you plan on having frequent guests. https://t.co/Ms3bc35Xr4— JER (@JER)1579149400.0
I feel like every guy needs a “lady drawer” if you plan on having frequent guests https://t.co/YCvP8Pj9Ga— TJ (@TJ)1579195189.0
I feel like every guy needs a “lady drawer” if you plan on having frequent guests. https://t.co/P4kzRnEa7K— ✦ eve ✦ (@✦ eve ✦)1579140168.0
Try again, BassFather.
Love... will make you want to forget love. Searching for love is one of the most exasperating "adventures" life has to offer. Half the time, the journey for love... will fail you. It's part of the gamble. If you're searching online, it makes it that much more nerve wracking. The crazies are running amuk out there. Sometimes the bumble isn't worth the buzz.
Redditor u/dannyboy8323 wanted everyone to band together and share some love stories gone awry by asking.... What's your biggest fail when it comes to online dating?
Not realizing how much can be lost in the absence of voice inflection and physical social queues. ealoft
This is what so many people can't seem to grasp when I explain to them I don't do online dating. If they've never experienced what it's like to have this happen they just can't understand it no matter how much I try to explain it. And, to me, it's a huge part of my attraction (or lack of) to a person.
Edit: it's not like I don't date or have issues getting dates, I just don't do online. I still meet people in real life, I just don't like online and feel my real life connections tend to work out better for me. seh_23
I still cringe.....
Oh man, the first time I contacted someone (it was via The Onion personals, which were really a thing in 2005), I just made fun of a band she said she liked. I wrote something like, "My only problem is that you are into (band)" She replied (as she should have), "My only problem is that the only thing you offer is a criticism". I still cringe. dinnersateight
Getting hundreds of matches on tinder but not going on a single date with someone I initially met from the app.
Edit: I am a male. I've set up many dates, but get ghosted the day of. alaf44
but good lord was I a naive fool....
Matched with someone on a dating website (before Tinder). Got to talking, seemed like a chill dude, even though there were red flags (he insisted we were dating before we met and I wasn't allowed to talk to anyone). Agreed to meet up with him at a cafe by work. Organized with my receptionist she would ring me at an allotted time and tell me I had to come back to work, so I had an out. Met with the guy for coffee, it seemed well enough, then my girl rang me, so I told him I had to get back. His response was "I've got my work van here, do you want to jump in the back and have a quickie?" I noped out of there and went back to work.
A couple of months later he ended up coming into my work to see my boss. I made polite small talk with him then when he left my boss called me into her office to ask how I knew him. Turned out he was married to my bosses niece and I dodged a bullet.
Update: sorry to leave you all hanging. Boss believed me, and we never spoke of it again. I was too embarrassed to raise the subject again because I keep my private life private, and her because i assume she kept that crap between her and her niece. My boss was also a black belt in jujitsu so not the person to mess with.
Yes, i should have known better when he got possessive straight out the gate, but I was young, insecure, and lonely. It's not a crime to want to be wanted, but good lord was I a naive fool. Fen_Misting
Dated a guy who was in a Poli-sci PhD program (confirmed) who had a law degree (confirmed) but had "left practice because he didn't enjoy it." Nope. Had been arrested for a federal hate crime as a neo-Nazi and was ineligible to practice. Thank god for google. doctaliz
When I connected Spotify my bumble profile and unbeknownst to me, 3 of my top 10 artists were the wiggles, hi-5 and blippi. Pretty sure I missed a few connections because of that! kwisssy
What's Your Password?
Not trying it sooner. At the end of the day, we're all just people looking to connect and share a Netflix account. toaster_jack
A female friend then thought it would be fun to create a tinder profile & swipe for me during a party. Spend the next few days being mind blown at getting matches, sucking at texting, progressively getting better at it. A few months later going on a ton of dates, getting better at that as well, and finally finding my current girlfriend of soon 2 years. Developed more at flirting & understanding dating in those 6 months than from birth up until that point. Sairony
Using Plenty Of Fish, the free dating site. It was like the Netto of dating sites. I chatted briefly with one woman before telling her I was going out for a few drinks.
Next day I checked my messages and she had sent some. It started with "why don't you come round to mine and get drunk together", progressing to "why are you ignoring me", then to "I think you're gorgeous and we will be good together" and finally "don't you ignore me".
I sent her a message the next day to never contact me again. zetecvan
Match to browse.
I used the free version of Match to browse, then decided to sign up. Quickly realized it didn't have anything to offer me, so I cancelled and got a refund. I then had 20 different emails about different women interested in me. Way too coincidental. cowbellhero81
3 Days In.
I once told a guy (via text) I had to go because my lunch break was over. When my shift ended there were tons of angry messages from him asking where I was and why I left so suddenly. I told him it was because my break was over and I can't text when I am at work. He then started apologizing to me and told me he was afraid he had lost me and that I hated him. We had "known" each other for 3 days and we had never met in real life. AtWarWithEurasia
She was way hotter than me.Giphy
I met with this very attractive woman off Upper middle class tinder (Bumble).
She was way hotter than me.
At some point during the evening, she leans forward on her bar stool, narrows her eyes and goes "I know there was some reason I swiped right on you".
Because at this point she could not remember 😂. ThatsASaabStory
crap happens mate....
Met with a girl at a bar in Philadelphia on a Friday night around 6PM. It was fun and we drank a lot, but I noticed that she was pacing MUCH faster than me. I had around 4 beers in the time it too her to drink 7 martinis ($15 a glass). We are getting along well and she says that she needs to use the rest room. She took her jacket and purse to the restroom. I didn't think much of it but after an hour of sitting at the bar alone waiting I realized that I got used for a heavy pregame.
The bartender kinda realized it. When I asked for the tab he shrugged and was like "crap happens mate. I took two drinks off your tab." djm2491
Since I'm a weirdo.....
I had about given up on dating in general after I broke up with another loser I had met on there. But I decided to revamp my profile a little and put exactly what I was looking for. I.e. looks don't matter, but you have to have a job, and not live on your mom's couch at 33, and have some goals regardless of how big or small they are, etc. I included that I am a professional with my own place, car, full time job, and college degree and though education isn't a deal breaker I just want someone I can have a conversation with. It was pretty straightforward.
I included that I like fun stuff too, because I am not a very serious person I just was tired of getting involved with losers. I went from getting several messages a day from guys to maybe a message a week.
Since I'm a weirdo, I made a second profile. I had zero pics of my face, and only partial body pics. I had pics of me with boxes on my head, wearing weird masks, etc. I put how I only read the necronomicon and I have antlers, and I glow in the dark or some weird shit. I got a crap ton of messages to that profile.
One of them ended up being my current partner of 6 years. Lol... once I sent him an actual pic of me he said he recognized me from my other profile. I asked later why he didn't message me on that one and he said I seemed scary or something.
Now I know that asking for a guy with goals is scarier than potentially being an antlered necromancer. jahlove24
Mix It Up.
Putting all my eggs in one basket. Once I start a conversation with one person, I just stick with that person until I know it's not going to go anywhere. I can't deal with trying to remember stuff about two+ people at the same time. I don't mind though if the person I'm talking to is talking to more than one person as long as if we're on a date, they're not on the phone to them or mix us up. hotchocolatelover
Agreeing to meet someone with a topless profile pic. My God he was vain. Sinnes-loeschen
From the Bots.
I matched a girl who looked really cool and complimented her hair. She responded with something along the lines of "I'm so glad you messaged me, most of these guys just match and never message." I've seen almost exactly the same line before from bots, so I assumed she was a bot and said something snarky about it.
She replied, upset, and then unmatched me. D_Thought
Not being exciting or witty enough in the text game. In real life my expressions and demeanor save me, not so much online. brucekeller
I'm the opposite, I'm so smooth over text but super awkward in person. My texting personality and in person self are basically two different personas, which is probably off putting. Lightning_Larry_
She was being flirty but I just kept asking "how's your day going" "what are you up to" and other generic questions until she stopped and never messaged me back. hayisforhorses101
Step yo freak game up son. satanvacation
Chatted with them a year by phone, once we met we had nothing to talk about and it was the most awkward encounter of my life. MattSouth
Sometimes chemistry fails to translate to IRL. If it was a good fit, you would still have had topics of conversation. greywolfau
You have no idea how many neglected wives are out there online and they love to omit the fact that they have husbands. Watch out for the milfs. She'll break your heart and her husband will break your neck. syringelol