Redditor celena6443 had some questions about seduction, so they asked:
"What's something simple that turns you on?"
A smile.
A simple smile gets me all of the time.
Kindness First
"I like it when she’s nice."
Ok_Pear_8291
"I like it when she's mean but in a nice way."
presideAM
Making Moves
"Returned interest. If I’m making a move, they’re making it known it’s very welcome."
DefinitelyNotADave
"This is the one. I am texting a girl who I have no idea if she’s into me or not but she gave me her number, didn’t reply to the last text I sent and I’m just like… well it was a question so I’m definitely not going to text again. Now I sit and wonder. I think I may overthink this whole dating thing."
eoJ_semoC_ereH
"Enthusiastic consent is appreciated. If I feel like I'm imposing on someone in any way, it makes me withdraw to avoid being a nuisance. I don't understand why some guys like it when girls display discomfort with romantic vibes."
FriedMattato
The Story
"My wife’s hips when she’s sitting. Specifically, if she’s in her undies doing her makeup, and I can see the little crease that her side butt/hips make. Don’t know why, but just makes me lose all train of thought if I see it."
theonephaze23
"I do indeed lose my train of thought regularly, i.e. whenever my wife changes her crossed legs while sitting on the couch and I'm facing her telling a story."
apeaquatic
"Exactly the same for me!! When I told my wife she don’t get it, and it is that line where her thigh meets the hip it's just so hot."
ilithios27
I Remember
"When she remembers things from previous conversations where I've talked about my hobbies, interests, favorite foods etc etc. I don't tell people these things with the expectation of them remembering or even caring but knowing they've paid attention and cared enough to remember the things I'm passionate about makes me feel valued, respected, and wanted. Anyone who doesn't try to suppress the little kid inside me that is passionate about some dorky things is cool with me."
warrof1
Hold Me
Hugs GIFGiphy"Hug from behind."
happygolucky226I
"Came to the comments to find this. I’m not a short woman, but my husband is much taller than me and a hug from behind combined with a back-of-neck kiss will get me from 0 to 1000 real quick."
IntuitiveMonster
Hug me, hold me, love me.
From behind I feel it.
Not Feet?
Hands Nails GIF by 2021 MTV Video Music AwardsGiphy"Had a casual hookup once who very sensually played with my hands and wow that was a level of intimacy I wasn't aware I could experience, and the immediate go zone it threw me into."
BlondeBreveHC
Big Talker
"The way a guy talks. Not just tone of voice but how he uses his words, or if he talks with his hands, etc."
Kbrown_021
Simplicity
"All my attention-starved ass can think of is positive direct attention. Like, when a person is very clearly interested in talking to you. Instead of passing greetings and bland conversation with the group that could be directed towards anybody who'd listen, they quickly direct their attention towards you and ask questions, trying to get to know you. "
"If someone hot does that... historically I've been too scared to do sh*t, but it definitely gets my heart pounding. Also, boobs. I'm a simple man."
2Scarhand
Gazing
"Eye contact."
nopestillgotit
"As an introvert and... I don't know someone who finds prolonged eye contact uncomfortable, if I'm attracted to someone and they are the type where they hold your gaze in conversations, I get sooo flustered so quick just—tingles everywhere."
bich-imma-slap-u
"This!! Oh, I go weak in my knees when my partner deep gazes into my eyes."
Impressive_Flan1600
Anything
"Sad cringe, but anything that says hey, here's something that I've done for you in my own free time specifically because I remember you saying you liked it, or because I wanted to impress you with something I personally like. I don't know, something (anything) that just reassures me that I'm not just the fat kid on the other end of the seesaw."
tazil_monkey
LOL
Mothers Day Lol GIF by reactionseditorGiphy"A compatible sense of humor. I like to make people laugh and have a unique sense of humor so if I make a woman laugh I'll catch feelings pretty quick. but if she makes me laugh I'm gonna be in love."
dimmu1313
Laughter is the best medicine.
And the best way to love.
Redditor pterv2112 wanted to hear about the things that are truthfully not so simple.
"What looks easy peasy lemon squeezy but is actually difficult difficult lemon difficult?"
Monopoly. For the life of me, I can't get the hang of that game. I don't care anymore.
Play it...
Saturday Night Live Happy Dance GIFGiphy"Playing the triangle. A lot of my non-musician friends joke about how easy it is to play it. Then they actually hold the damn thing and look stupid."
phamtasticgamer
It's A Lot!
"Work. I'm a lawyer and had a client call saying she needs a help with a merger, but 'don't worry, it's super easy peasy lemon squeezy.' That project took 6 months and I almost had a breakdown. She didn't understand why the bill was so high since it was SO easy."
moekay
"Gotta love how the layman lumps all lawyers together as the sleazy snakeoil salesman type without realizing or appreciating the sheer complexity of the legal work involved."
cotidie_abide
Body Moves
"Dancing. I wouldn't say it looks 'easy,' but when I see people do it, they're so good at it and it flows so well it looks easy. But damn, I just CANNOT get my body to do anything more than a bop and maybe some stupid arm moves. I'm 25 and dance like a 50 year old at a reunion. Dancers are so delicate and make it look so easy, it's honestly amazing. It's just hilarious when I try to do literally anything and fail horribly."
MiloAlbertsky
Fingered
"Whistling with your fingers."
SimplySolstice
"My cousin taught me when we were in our tweens. It's come in very helpful whistling for the dogs and horses at feeding time."
"What I always wanted to learn was how my grandpa whistled without having to stick dirty fingers in my mouth. Nothing like cleaning stalls, then trying to whistle for horses with sh*t-covered hands. Washing them in near-freezing buckets of water wasn't a first choice either."
flecksable_flyer
It's a...
Studying Hand-Made GIF by Philippa RiceGiphy"Drawing something from memory. Like a bird or something. In mind - yep that's a bird On paper - that's... a bird?"
KayGlo
Drawing birds is impossible; mine look like mules.
Go Deep
Digging Blue Collar GIF by JC Property ProfessionalsGiphy"Digging. Anytime it's shown in movies or TV it looks easy AF but the second you have to grab a shovel and break dirt... bleh."
justaboredfarmer
Hello Doc
"A basic physical exam at the doctor. Looks like a simple 'look at the throat' - 'listen to the chest' - 'yup they have a heart all right.' When in actuality Doctors spend thousands of hours practicing it so that when you come in with a murmur or 'Funny-looking-kid-syndrome' they can recognize it immediately."
"And yes, there are entire class sections on how to respectfully ask your patient to turn their head and cough as you push on their testicles (they're looking for hernias)."
RobheadOW
Variations
"Street names. Everyone thinks it's great fun and likes to offer suggestions but every tree, lake, and other natural feature has at least a dozen variations which you can't repeat for emergency service reasons. That and you get cities which want a street name change anytime the road changes direction regardless of a logical break point like an intersection."
blue_fox_13
Being Regular
"'Natural' makeup. More work than 'regular' makeup."
Lockshala
"To be honest this reminds me of a video I watched of a visual effects artist explaining his job, If no one notices your work on the footage you've done your job well, its only when you mess up do people notice."
EON199
"This is painfully true for a lot of jobs. When nobody notices, it means you did an excellent job but no one will give you credit because they aren't even aware there is credit due. But the moment you slightly f**k up, you're the worst person in your profession."
BreakfastCheesecake
The Squeeze
As If Lol GIF by MOODMANGiphy"Making lemonade. Sure squeezing one lemon is easy peasy, but do you know how much juice that makes? Not a lot."
PrimaryOstrich
Psssh simple...
"Pretty much anything that a professional does. They make it look easy cause it's their job. Throw a football 65 yards accurately? Psssh simple if you're an elite athlete. Cut open a chest cavity to fix a few coronary arteries? It's just another day at the office for a surgeon. Frame up a structural wall within a 2000 sq ft house?"
"Just a bunch of wood and nails is all you need. Make crowded teeth perfectly aligned? Surely it's just a matter of wearing trays 1 through 55, voila! It's all straight. In reality, each of these tasks takes someone who trained for years to visualize the problem, solve it, and execute it to the T. It looks easy, cause they practiced the hell out of it."
buttgers
3 feet off the floor...
"Flying remote controlled helicopters. It looks so effortless when watching seasoned flyers but in reality it’s like balancing a marble on an upturned bowl."
Michael_Stone_UDA
"I'll never forget the time I went out and bought a decently priced helicopter."
"5 minutes into setting it up, i didn't even get it 3 feet off the floor before i smashed it into a chair destroying the rotor blades."
"I tried maybe like 5-6 more times before i gave up and now it hangs in my garage as a monument to my failure."
Deseptikons
Relationships
"Maintaining friendships from high school/college after you graduate. People get so busy with work and starting their own families that friendships get put on the back burner. You stop talking to someone for a few months, then it suddenly hits you that you're no longer friends with the person."
DeathSpiral321
"The mark of a good friendship is one in which you can go a long time without seeing or talking to someone, and the moment you see or talk to them again, it's like you saw them just yesterday."
Moonchopper
Comfy
GIF by Vulture.comGiphy"Folding fitted sheets. I've watched instructional videos that make it look so easy but I always just end up with a crumpled up mess, and that's how it gets put away."
AngryGoose
On Wheels
"I use a wheelchair and people usually don't believe me when I say that getting around can be difficult, because many of them think that pushing a wheelchair is easy. (They literally tell me this.)"
"The thing is when you use a wheelchair all day and it is basically your only means of transportation, it looks more natural."
"This becomes a problem when I point out accessibility problems. They often don't believe me because they see how I can navigate and assume that it's easy – just because *I* make it look easy."
buckyhermit
Payments
"Finding a career you’ll want to go to every day that won’t crush your soul. Remember when you were young and teachers told you that you could be whatever you wanted to be... yeah, not so realistic when you want to pay bills and maybe have a little beer money too."
"I didn’t go to college and struggle with the thought of not being able to have a lateral career move without a degree, but then I see my friends absolutely floundering with their student loan payments and think maybe I don’t have it so bad after all."
goldengirlsmom
I See Living People
"Socializing with people. I have severe social anxiety, and even small interactions with strangers, and even some people I’ve known for a while are really hard for me. I don’t hate people or dislike being around them, but I’m just awful at keeping conversations going or initiating them. Outgoing people make it look very easy, for me it is not."
Workout Exercise GIF by OpenfitI love Lemonade... the drink and the album... but I have no patience to make it.
Redditor MuchDuck wanted to discuss what we maybe need to chill about because we're not in that much danger.
"What is widely considered a red flag but actually is not?"
Let'e be less cautious. Life is meant to be lived.
Hold On
Text Chat GIF by IlizaGiphy"Not responding to message within 5 milliseconds."
JiroAizato1
"I am a quick texter. I just type really fast. I make people feel like they need to respond immediately or I'll get mad even though I tell them I don't expect it lol. I get seen as a red flag lol."
ExtensionQuantity112
Sight Unseen
"Not making eye contact doesn't mean someone is lying."
Electronic-Emu-773
"Too much eye contact can actually indicate someone is lying as they're looking at you to see if you believe it."
krs1426
"I’m afraid I will see negative emotions towards me in others eyes. Disappointment, dislike, any kind of dis. Also, I have a very expressive face. I don’t want to bare my soul. I don’t like lying but I’m not brutally honest if it only hurts another."
pugapooh
The Socials
"Not having a social media presence. I’ve had multiple people tell me that my choice not to use social media was a huge red flag, but in reality I got rid of my accounts because they were making me miserable. I got rid of my Instagram/twitter accounts two years ago, and have been noticeably happier ever since."
"Edit: I really did not expect this comment to blow up so much. I think this is the first time that’s ever happened to me. Obviously a lot of people feel the same way that I do. Quick note to save a few people some typing: Yes, I obviously still use Reddit. I mostly kept it because I like the News tab, and the anonymity makes it far easier to deal with than something like Instagram."
taylor52087
Profiles
"Not posting pictures with friends on your dating profile. Some people assume you’re anti-social and not pleasant to be around, but I choose not to because I feel weird to post pictures of other people than myself."
GreenLurch
"I entirely prefer someone to *not* post pictures with friends. It's hell when ALL of their pictures are with friends so it's like 'Who the hell am I getting from these 20 different people that aren't strikingly different?'"
Sophiliath
Alone is good...
Wink Flirting GIF by GIPHY Studios OriginalsGiphy"Not dating for several years, I’ve been told by girls that if a guy has been single for over five years that’s a problem.So you’d prefer he’d be in 25 relationships in the last five years and wonder why all those relationships didn’t work out?"
bigblueberryboobies
Sometimes alone is the better option. Smarter.
Stay Away
San Diego Lol GIF by San Diego Zoo Wildlife AllianceGiphy"Not having many friends. I'm just very introverted not a weirdo."
sticks-in-spokes
Blood isn't always thick...
"Not getting along with parents. Some parents are abusive, neglectful, or toxic to be around; and if an adult chooses not to be around that, good for them. Of course, if a person is actively awful to their parents, that's another story."
insertcaffeine
"THANK YOU. everyone always says that I’m being rude by being so uncomfortable sitting next to my mom, and that’s because around other people she seems like a really really nice woman, but when its only the family she is MENTAL and mentally abusive AF."
Sunfl0w3rD4wn
Weirdo
"Being independent, or even a loner. Sometimes we’re just shy and have poor social skills. We’re not 'creeps' or 'weird.' I just do my own thing and leave people alone for the most part unless they want me in their life."
BurghFinsFan
"This is me. I do not have anyone, except my wife, that I would call a close friend. I am active in a few areas hobbies, but that is it. I am not lonely and enjoy socializing once in awhile, but honestly I like doing my own thing. I get plenty of socializing with my coworkers during the day."
toad__warrior
Hidden Figures
"I once met a girl who thought it was a red flag that I always placed my phone screen down on a table. She thought it meant I was hiding something. I had to try and explain that it's too big to keep in my pocket and it's screen down to be polite and show her that she has my undivided attention. Although, I must admit, that her level of insecurity was a red flag to me."
Natural-Ad678
Roommates
Family GIFGiphy"Living with family, in this day and age it’s just not feasible for everyone to have their own place."
kumakami89
Living with family... that's the new best roommate situation.
Do you have something to add? Let us know in the comments.
Everyone can be ambidextrous!
"I'm left handed and and I wanted to learn to write with my right hand."
"it was much easier than I thought and now I can write with it making it look somewhat decent."- JE3V4N_
"Using your off hand skillfully."
"I worked on this when I owned a woodworking business and it has helped so many times over the years."- karg_the_fergus
Should you ever forget your keys...
"Picking a lock."
"It only takes about 1 or 2 hours to learn, contrary to popular belief." - DifficultAd5113
frustrated frustration GIFGiphyCan't get to the genius stand? No problem!
"Fixing computers."
"It's just a lot of googling and YouTubing."- theassassintherapist
"Basic IT troubleshooting."- usmarine7041
You'll have a blanket done in no time!
"Crocheting!"
"It looked really difficult to me but I was really pleased how easy it was to pick up."
"Especially with YouTube tutorials."- geeltulpen
Crochet GIF by Twin_MadeGiphyBut do get a license first...
"Flying a small airplane is actually very simple."
"It's everything else like weather and flight planning, emergency mindfulness, airspace and traffic, and confidence in yourself that gets tricky, but any person with eyeballs and a pulse could fly a plane."- Clyde-MacTavish
With practice, of course
"Parallel parking."- Feels2old
Give your arms a rest!
"Unicycling."
"It takes just 10-20 minutes a day for 3-10 days.'
"Find a railing you can lean on to start."
"At some point, you'll be able to let go and ride!'- Vegan_BTW_VR
Juggling Unicycle GIF by Derek TeeGiphy... Is it though?...
"Driving a stick shift."- fantazja1
Need a new chair? Well, get to work!
"Woodworking."
"Understanding the machinery isn’t easy at all, but woodworking by itself with files or a knife is very easy to learn."
"And there’s youtube."- SaikageBeast
Give Zuckerberg a run for his money...
"Programming."
"Easy to get into but hard to master, also most of it is just debugging."- ousz
"Programming."
"Specially web and mobile programming."- FrancoRATOVOSON
Work Coding GIF by ScalerGiphyGalleries will be vying for your work!
"I’m gonna get hate but DRAWING!"
"Literally, practice genuinely makes perfect with drawing."
"Look at other’s works, trace for a little to get the hang of certain shapes, i swear it’s not that hard and so easy once you understand the basics."- arthropodlover
"Drawing."
"Start by tracing pictures you like, get the feel for it and start practicing your sketches."- knipmes
We all have to face our fears...
"Fighting your fear against spiders."
"All you need to do is hold one in your hand you’ll realize that there is no need to fear them."- huet_fan
Drive safely!
"Definitely using your blinker while changing lanes."- Fluid_Fig9070
mini cooper car GIF by MINI USAGiphySafety first
"Balisong knife flipping, if you’re starting safe with a trainer then honestly just fidgeting around you can get some cool tricks cracked down."- StormoQuake
It's not so difficult to be bilingual
"A language."
"When you are completely immersed in another culture, it comes really quick."
"I learned several languages fluently within 6 months when I lived in their countries"- WieBentUEigenlijk
It's just a numbers game...
"Math."
"So much of the time is explained in an overly complex way, these textbooks need to chill."- Erect_Teeth
Looking Let Me Think GIF by TipsyElves.comGiphyNext time you think, "aw, I wish I could do that," rather than keep wishing, why not just give it a try?
I'm just not that into any of it. I'm also tired. That's just me. And you?
Me
For Me GIF by Lil YachtyGiphy"Me, myself and I."
F1r3Phoen1x
"Try trusting all three of them."
TaintModel
Tough
"Trust issues."
DrMannulus
"That’s such a tough way to live. It took me until my 40’s to realize that the main person who didn’t like me was myself. Took me a few years to talk myself around to liking me and then loving me. Now I am able to be less critical of other people too. (If I’m judging others, then I must expect to be judged too) My life is less stressful and I’m actually happy."
hen1bar
Meh
"Currently I'm making 0 effort to do so. Haven't been interested in anyone in a while."
Angel_OfSolitude
"Same, I hate online dating cause I can't tell what peoples personalities are and Im not on most forums of social media. 'Im obviously still on reddit but I have nothing else besides snapchat."
"I also work a lot as well, so pretty much the only time I come in contact with new women in my life is like at the grocery store. I don't drink much but I feel like I need to start hitting bars or college parties or something though. Im not even in college but It seems like it's the only way to meet women around my age without social media."
"Or just approaching random ones in the store. I just feel like unless I just actively 'hunt' for a date I won't ever find one. Which sucks cause I'd rather meet women organically, rather than just trying to hit up someone you see cause they might have potential based on looks."
thepastyprince
Happy
"The idea that I'm happy by myself."
Dvmbledore
"It's definitely a confidence thing. People in relationships don't need others' approval nearly as much - this translates to more confident, less needy behavior that signals to others that you're self-assured and comfortable with yourself. That's very appealing."
theragingletter
in-between...
amanda tanen catwalk GIF by HULUGiphy"I'm in that awkward in-between area where I've got too much self-worth to settle for someone who's going to ruin my life and not enough self-worth to let a good person love me."
JACofalltrades1
There really is no rhyme or reason to it all. Is there?
Blah
annoyed GIFGiphy"My personality. I get bored really fast, and don’t think it’ll be fair to the other person. My friends say it’s because I haven’t met the right person, maybe true, but I don’t want to risk it."
mapeci77
"the rest of my life"
"Not being able to find someone that I can forsee the rest of my life with."
nuovi
"When I was dating in the 1970s, 'the rest of my life' was my standard statement to myself. Sure he was great to be around, but could I put up with him for the rest of my life? For my one, yes, except it was for the rest of his life. He died in January after being married for 44+ years. Simple comparison: Could I live with him in lockdown?
EC-Texas
"attractive"
"I'm not the best in social situations and I feel like I have nothing to offer."
JukeBoxHero1997
"Just a heads up: you absolutely have something to offer. Whether you're good at socializing or not, just show someone kindness and respect."
"And be there for them, and if they are available and attracted to you then you'll be everything they need. And I don't mean like you have to be physically 'attractive,' but like the person actually is down to hang out with you. Either way, you have worth and someone would be happy to love the sh*t out of you if you let them. :) "
SteveNJulia
Terrible
"I'm a really terrible partner. I've put multiple people through absolute hell, because they have normal expectations in relationship. I require a lot of alone time, sometimes I just want to sleep by myself. sometimes I like traveling by myself. I can get super depressed and withdraw."
"I've learned now that I have to keep things casual and I'm probably not meant to be a typical relationship where you build a life together and live together all the time. Also, I'm sure it's just modeling because my mom and stepdad live separately and just go on dates, so unless I find someone who loves being alone as much as me (unlikely) I guess I'm just over here vibing."
LadySovereign
Too Good
Which One Reaction GIF by AudibleGiphy"Vacillating wildly between 'I'm not good enough for this person, and it’s only a matter of time before they find out,' and, 'I’m too good for this person, I will never be satisfied.' Often, multiple times on the space of a single afternoon."
robbycakes
Ask them to hang out?
"My desire hasn't overtaken the expectations of effort required."
haijak
"The effort can be pretty ridiculous. I re-entered the dating pool somewhat recently after being in a relationship for most of my adult life and holy s**t is it terrible. People expect you to know exactly what they want when they want and if you mess anything up then they'll move on to someone else. Ask someone out too early? You're weird. Ask them out too late?"
"They're not interested any more - you missed your chance. Ask them to hang out? Too vague - no. Ask them on a dinner date? Too specific and too much pressure. Everyone has different expectations and people are so unforgiving if you can't figure it out. I'm told pretty frequently that I'm attractive and have other good qualities and yet I'm terrible at dating. The whole process is so confusing and demoralizing. I stopped trying after a while."
thequietthingsthat
I Know this pain...
"Self sabotage."
acid_vision_
"I’m very positive I do this unconsciously whenever I date. I seem to be very attracted to people that are either unstable, they don’t know what they want or emotionally immature. It’s like my brain wants me to be alone forever."
cemeterykitten
at a loss...
"I'm not the kind of sociable that goes out of his way to meet people for that reason. I don't care for bars or parties for instance. It's not that I don't want someone, it's that I don't really know how/what to do. And since I'm a male, it's doubtful a girl would risk it herself and pursue me. So yeah... at a loss."
Tijain_Jyunichi
Today's Crush
Happy Alison Brie GIFGiphy"Getting hyper-fixations on people and then being disappointed when they are normal people. Just today had a crush on my young orthodontist - like 5/6 years older than me cause he was nice while fitting new retainers."
DaffodilGoofyDuck
"I do this except only ever with one person lol. I’ve only ever been truly attracted to one person. I still have a long time so I imagine it’ll happen again, but I still thinks it’s weird when people my age by this point have ex counts in the double digits."
Entercheesynamehere
No Interest
"I simply don’t have the energy to provide and love someone unconditionally at this point of time in my life. I want to grow as an individual and love myself first. I choose to not be in a relationship for that purpose because it would be completely unfair for them."
Sienna-hart
Apps are a joke...
"I have no idea how to meet people. Apps are a joke, I don't drink so I have no reason to be in a bar, and the only friends I have are on discord so no group activity stuff. My one hobby outside of gaming (hiking) is also very solo focused with me not even encountering another person for most of the day... I've just given up and accepted that I'm just not meant to ever find anyone."
zose2
I Don't Need You
"The question isn't what's stopping it from happening. It's more that having a life partner is a huge commitment that I don't really want to enter with anyone that I know, nor am I really seeking out someone that could fulfil that role because it's not a net positive to be in a relationship. I really enjoy not being beholden to anyone, and someone would have to overwhelm that for me to want to be with them long term... I think I'd prefer to just have some really good friends."
PastaBakeWizard
"capable"
kevin can wait focus GIF by CBSGiphy"I'm not in as much of a rush as I used to be. My focus is on patching up the holes in my life so I can love myself first."
"I've been mentally checked out for a while. Too many pressures, too many thoughts, and too much self-neglect. I'm steadily getting back into a comfortable feeling. Just recently started feeling 'capable' again. Maybe someday I'll find someone, but it's no longer a do-or-die event for me."
Tylrt
Toleration
"I'm at the age where I should have my life figured out at this point, but I don't. My peers are generally already established in life and are rightfully looking for a partner who's on their level. Couple that with bad attachment insecurities, and it would be cruel to get another girl a tangled up in this hot mess haha."
"Anyone in this thread though should look at their reasons and try to work on them earnestly. I am currently and hope to one day get to a place in life that maybe someone might tolerate me long enough to give me some head pats or whatever people in relationships do. It's tough, like really tough, to not have someone for this long, but you can only march forward."
lastcallcarrot
Alone is ok as long as you're ok. So be ok alone.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.