Cringey coworkers, we've all been there. The worst I ever encountered was a male associate at a higher end jewelry store. He was good, his sales spoke for themselves, he looked like a model, which perfectly showcased the touches of diamonds he wore. Really, he didn't need to suck up to be noticed as a good employee...but he did anyways and it came back to bite him.
He would gossip to bring other salespeople down and make them look bad. After sharing an especially personal and mean-spirited comment about another coworker I looked at him in disdain and said "I would hate to hear what you have to say about me when I am not here." He sputtered a bit trying to say something along the lines of how I was different etc.
The environment wasn't for me and I left although months later it turns out he was fired after trying to spread false and damaging gossip to a regional manager about the boss. He could have just been nice to people and gotten promoted his own merits instead of tearing people down.
It's such commonplace for these situations to occur one Redditor by the name of ActualWater1994 wanted to her more cringe-inducing stories.
"What's the cringiest/ worst examples of butt-kissing you've seen at work?"
Reddit did not disappoint.
That came back to bite her!
“Part of my job is delivering children's books to some agencies to hand out. One month our executive director didn't like the book that came in. There were a couple lines she felt were inappropriate."
“She asked me not to deliver them and she would order new books. A coworker of mine noticed I didn't deliver them and took it upon herself to do it. The executive director doesn't care for her and she was trying to get on her good side."
“She thought she could make herself look good by making me look bad. I thought she went to lunch, had no idea she was out there trying to do my job. She came back and proudly tells others that she did my job and maybe now the director will be pleased."
"She came to my desk and angrily says, in earshot of the director, 'I just went and delivered the books that you never delivered. I shouldn't have to do your job on top of everything I'm already doing for this agency'. I just looked at her and said 'Well that was dumb'."
"She went to the director next and told her that she delivered the books since she seen it hadn't been done and asked if there were any other tasks she could do for her. The director was pissed!!! She was planning on returning those books so she could order different ones."
"They weren't labeled with our logo yet either, which she would have seen if she checked. It's required that we put our logo on them. The director tore into her for overstepping her boundaries and trying to make me look bad. She tried so hard to kiss her butt and it backfired big time. Oh and I was praised in front of her for listening."
“My boss sent me out to get her boss a birthday card and gift, which was all fine and good as it meant an escape from her for an hour or so. The card was nothing out of the ordinary, but the cake was very fancy and not your typical office birthday cake. I then had to swing by Tiffany's to pick up the bracelet that was the actual gift, just from her to her boss. Expensive gifts to colleagues let alone managers, were not the done thing there (and it wasn't even like it was a bank or anything high end) so it seemed horribly out-of-place and blatantly butt-kissing.”
No one likes a braggart.
“Had a coworker in my marketing team who was a lead designer. He was often pretty dismissive of junior level employees, or would try and one-up everyone's stories (you tell him you stayed at a hotel at the beach over the weekend, he tells you he stayed in a penthouse at the same beach for a whole week).”
“He also always tried to be in proximity of senior staff members and would brag loudly if they were within an earshot, hoping they would hear how awesome his life is, I would assume. One day, a VP from our company had come up to talk to somebody in a pod close to ours.”
“The pretentious designer loudly asked me about my weekend, I gave him an answer. He responded loudly, one upping my answer, noticed the VP wasn't paying attention to him at all, quickly got up, hovered behind the VP while he was talking to the other employee.”
“Eventually the VP cracked a joke and the designer let out the loudest, fakest laugh I've ever heard, startling the VP, who up until then was not aware that this guy was standing behind him. VP just got an awkward close lipped smile, quickly nodded his head, and walked away. Designer came back to our pod, sat down, and started working as if he was never mid conversation with me."Giphy
"I just looked at him and kept walking.”
“I had this coworker at target that would go on the biggest power trip for no reason whenever he was on guest services. Guest services is the people usually at the front of the store where you do returns and stuff like that for anyone that doesn't know. We all would alternate doing it, and it was usually with a manager — there's literally nothing special about it besides that it was slightly more tolerable than being on a register."
“Whenever said coworker would be on guest services he would think he was manager and was the most unbearable person for the hour he would be doing it.
One shift I was walking to the bathroom, which you had to walk past guest services to get to, and he went out of his way to loudly ask me where I was going in that managerial tone I'm sure you're all familiar with as if he was a manager."
"I just looked at him and kept walking.He would do similar things like that to everyone and it was just the cringiest thing I've ever seen. I've never seen someone become such a kiss-*ss because they did a slightly different role from everyone else for an hour — and everyone did guest services like we literally just alternated throughout the shift."
No one wanted to work with him...
“Happened recently at work. One particular co-worker is almost insufferable with his behavior. Constant trumpet blowing with his lackluster work, endless comments about how much money he has, degrading other team members to get some kind of moral high ground and get in good graces with management."
“Whats more cringe is his posts and interactions on the team member WhatsApp group, really fake or cheesy crap that definitely is not his character at all. Basically everything that he does involves trying to sh*t on someone to look better at his job."
“Anyway, he thought he was top sh*t after one of the managers recently left and applied to take the advertised Duty Manager role. He was shut down almost immediately and apparently one of the night managers straight up told him that they did not want him to work nights due to nobody wanting to work with him."
Former Flat Earthers Explain What Finally Made Them Come Around | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
That’s the way the cookie crumbles...
“Other receptionist at my work is a huge *ss kisser. Calls herself head receptionist when she's really just a part-timer that doesn't do her job right. Will constantly have 'meetings' with the bosses and take credit for things other people do. Most recent example is when a client brought us donuts and left them at the front desk."
“I was in a room but heard the convo between the client and her about the donuts being a gift. Then heard her walk to the back and announce to our boss that she (receptionist) ordered them donuts because they work so hard"
They added the sweet ending to their coworker's donut deception in another comment.
"I walked into the breakroom when the boss was in there, pretended to see the donuts and went 'Oh! Mr C did stop by with those donuts after all!' My boss must've suspected something cause she got a look on her face but smiled at me and told me to add him to the thank you card list."
"I guess it got back to that receptionist that I 'tattled' on her because the next time she was in she critiqued me on a bunch of things. Most annoying trait about her though for me is when she talks to me, she hardly ever makes eye contact and will just stare at my arms (which have scars). Only me, no one else."
“Just be yourself.”
“My supervisor is always trying so hard to be best friends with management where I work, there are many examples to choose from but this one makes me cringe the hardest due to the sheer expense: my manager is a big lover of fresh coffee. So yeah, my supervisor spent a small fortune on a fancy coffee machine for herself, even though I remember having a conversation with her at one time about how she can't stand the taste of coffee.”
“She comes to work everyday with the branded travel mug that came with the coffee machine, but, instead of coffee inside it's extremely milky tea. I asked her about it and she uses the machine for hot water. Just be yourself, people would like you more god dang it all!“
Office baby shower...
“I work with a woman who threw a baby shower for a manager's (not her manager though) wife, thrown in our office. Meanwhile her equally pregnant ‘friend’ in the office was invited to the party but received no shower of her own or even an acknowledgement from the suck up.”
“Funny thing is everyone hates the manager so nobody really stayed longer than they had to. Also she tries to call us out for not getting gifts for for the manager on national boss's day as if him being paid more to f**k things up for us isn't enough already.”
Magic the Gatheing cards...
“One of my co-workers knew the branch manager was obsessed with magic the gathering, so he pretended to have 'connections' with someone at Wizards where he got 'free cards'. Turns out this guy was actually just buying the cards."
“One of my other co-workers saw him buying a booster box at a Walmart nearby. He was literally bribing the boss for favors with magic cards that he paid full price for. The sad thing? It worked."
“Everyone knew this dude got preferential treatment. When he f**ked things up, manager dude would always cover for him. He got promoted to a position he definitely didn't deserve over someone else who was way more qualified."
“We even tried letting bossman know that he was just buying the cards at the walmart nearby, but he didn't believe us. So yeah, a few thousand in magic cards got the buttkisser raises worth 5x that."Giphy
Dating the boss's daughter, *mega-cringe*.
“The worst was a guy I worked with at my last job doing HVAC...because the boss was going to get a full report on whatever crew he worked with that day. If you said something negative about the boss, he was going to tell. If you were a minute or two late coming back from lunch, he had a pic on his phone with the time stamp."
"If you didn't hang something perfectly level or straight, he'd toss a level on it, snap a pic, send it to the boss. He also came in every Sunday and washed all the trucks (with no pay) to make sure we kept a good image. Found out eventually it had nothing to do with the job...he was just dating the boss's daughter and he was trying to 'prove' himself."
These are some serious cringe-inducing work moments. Sadly enough, most of the attempts would have gone over better if the person had just been themselves and worked together the first place. Others though, well, flattery can get you everywhere...
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Some jobs are just not worth the stress. Yes we all need money to survive and thrive but there can be ways to achieve that goal that will not leave you mentally baron. How many of us have looked around the office or state of work we are in and thought.... "Now this is too much?"
Do I Live Here....Giphy
Being scheduled on basically every day I was supposed to have off.
Lately whenever the mother of one of my students pisses off the father (they divorced >4 months ago) he will send all three of their kids in mismatched clothes with shirts that have some variation of "I love my Dad" or "Daddy's kid."
I have not seen the same shirt twice and believe mom throws the shirts out and dad just keeps buying more.
Is This Normal?
"Do this task. What do you need?
- I need 30 computers and 20 USB3 flash drives.
- Here's 15 computers and 7 USB2 flash drives.
- What? I need 30, where's the other 15? And these flash drives won't do, the system won't even work with those.
- Budget cuts, sorry."
"How's this task going along?
- Everything is set to go, but as is it won't fulfill the task.
- What's keeping you from doing the task?
- I need 15 more computers and 20 USB3 flash drives.
- Ok, we'll order more ASAP, they'll be here in two years. Make sure everything's running by September though."
Are things like this everywhere or is it just at my job?
I'll get back to you....
I have a vendor who gives me the same answer every day that I email him: "Let me check and get back to you."
His shipment has slipped by over two months at this point and it's driving me nuts.
He's doing the same thing to other people in my office on other projects. He's on a quick list to be blacklisted, but unfortunately, the clients love his stuff.
Edit: Furniture, he sells furniture. Why does everyone think it's drugs?
I handed in my notice at work and my boss suddenly stopped talking to me. LOL...
Should have just been that way to begin with you idiots!
This other Woman?
A third party keeps insisting that an individual worked for my company. They did not. We have searched everywhere. We have punched in every variation of their name, birthday, social security number into our system. Dude didn't work here, and "Well this other woman says he did" isn't an argument.
ETA: As much as I appreciate all the replies, this is not my first rodeo as an attorney, and I wouldn't be complaining if this had a simple fix like "tell them to f--- off" or "stop replying."
Oh the Journeymen....
I manage all the tools, parts, and materials for a small electrical company. We have a ton of little fittings, couplings, and such that are very small and have multiple parts. We recently let one of our journeymen go, and I'm in the process of clearing out his van. Turns out he was hoarding tens of thousands of fittings in his van, all mixed together with absolutely no organization.
To top it off, at least 60% of them were completely disassembled before being just chucked in to drawers, boxes, and bags along with mixed bolts, nuts, fasteners, etc, so it is now my job to take these collections of assorted hardware and dump them out, separate them, and reassemble as many as I can before restocking them in my already overflowing shop.
Nobody Likes You....
It's my boss' birthday, not a lot of folks respect her. I'm new to the department and was asked by Don to collect money on Friday to get her flowers. He was going to bake a cake and bring it in. He was sick yesterday so didn't come to work. I collected a measly 19$ from others, awkward af because no one even likes her, topped it up with my own 10 to get a decent bunch of flowers, bought yesterday evening and brought in this AM.
Don is in and says "I couldn't find the money you collected, do you have it" I said "I used it yesterday to buy the flowers, wasn't that the plan?" He replies with an attitudey "well no..." I ask why it matters and he says. Well I couldn't bake the cake because I was sick so I don't know what we're going to do now if the money's used up, we can't get a cake now"
Another girl nicely chimes in that she will run out and grab a cake and don't worry Don it's all fine. Don's a snippy guy so I don't bother asking him how I was to know he's too ridiculous to go get a cake himself.
Others are running around asking me if I've seen the money because apparently Don's making it well known that I was supposed to collect money but no one has seen the envelope (obviously, I took it yesterday), then I have to explain that I used all the money so I look stupid. Keep throwing in that I was doing exactly as was asked of me but Jesus Don would it kill you to communicate your change of plans to people???
Bar manager and 20% of the staff quit. Owner hasn't hired anyone. It's been 3 months. No one can take unexpected days off or call in sick and inventory is at an all time low. (Except the kegs. So. Many. Kegs.) We keep running out of everything. I (and others) have offered to help over the summer and nothing has come of it.
The restaurant is expanding and we need more employees but my boss is too focused on having us dust (during construction), replacing glassware with crystal, and setting up public accessible training courses to bother with actual management. Oh, and communication is non existent, so I regularly show up to work and have no idea where stuff is or what the new procedures are.
The Good ole CC....Giphy
I work with a woman who cc's her boss on all emails. Her boss follows up on all of the emails 5-10 minutes later. They looks like this:
Woman: "Hey Ganglebot, we're starting this new thing so can you send us X, Y and Z when you have a chance - thanks!"
Her boss, 5 min later: "Ganglebot, as per [woman's] initial request, we need these things to move forward. In our previous meeting on May 4th, at 2pm you indicated you could send these to us. I ask you to please send these along ASAP as our initiative depends on good information. Please confirm receipt and indicate when we can expect these documents."
The Goodbye Girl....
Girlfriend took the time off in advance to see a best friend she hasn't seen in two years for literally one day. Work is currently telling her that they're scheduling a mandatory employee meeting everyone needs to go to or else you get fired. Keep in mind there is barely anything important that ever gets announced at these.
I was offered a job at another location. I told my boss about it and my current company offered me a raise to stay. I took it. It's been 2 months and I haven't seen the raise in my paycheck yet.
UPDATE: I emailed my boss and asked for an update. They assumed I understood that the raise would begin at our new fiscal year which starts July 1. So it will be in my next paycheck.
Jeff cuts his fingernails every damn day in his office. How do they grow so fast? Is he a werewolf?
Also, he scrapes every last tiny damn bit out of his yogurt container. It's so loud and he does it for like 3 minutes straight.
As Time Goes By....
Boss doesn't understand how time works.
The next week he comes to me again and says the same thing. Literally word for word. I remind him that I'm not finished the super important thing from last week and he says it doesn't matter, the new thing is important, put 100% of my time on it.
The following week he comes to me and asks me if I finished the first task. No, I say, I stopped working on it to work on the new task. But, he says, I told you to work on it 100%.
I said, "You want me to work 100% on task A, AND 100% on task B?"
Yes. Yes he did. Not 50/50. 100/100. He didn't understand time.
I wasn't able to hit the target goal for the cancer screening program I work for this year. Basically my head office asked me to increase the number of people we screen for breast cancer this past year. I agreed to the increased goal but they then didn't increase my budget enough to actually cover it.
So come the end of our fiscal year and I'm having to explain to them over and over why it happened. And my boss JUST called to ask if I can increase my goal more for next year with no additional funds. The Peter principle alive and well.
Such a Bot....
Two of my co-workers were promoted out of the department and no one was hired to replace them, leaving me to do the work of three people (minimum). Upon expressing that my own hours weren't enough time to get the work done - even with overtime, I was told, "You have to get it done. If you can't get it done it means we'll have to find someone else who will."
Robot. What you're looking for is a robot willing to work 24/7 for a barely living wage. Got it. Glad to know the company values my mental health.
I do sound for cover band at a hotel that feels like they're better than or at least equal to an act that sells out stadiums. Every night I deal with 5 60+ year old musicians with expectations that would make Mariah Carey say that's too darn much.
Client had a full 10 months to review a demo site that we had up. They made a couple of nitpicks and claimed they were happy with it. The site went into staging a few weeks ago and they immediately came up with a list of 50+ issues with it and demand it be fixed or they won't renew the contract.
Are you Busy?
Sharing an office with OSHA specialist. He has literally nothing to do,each morning he fills up the three band aid dispensers that we have and then stares out the window or sits in front of a blank computer screen all day and keeps damn clicking with his pen and annoying the crap out off me.
Meanwhile I have so much stuff to do shits falling off my table, have tons of emails, people constantly asking for help and he then he leans over the monitor and comments "busy today eh?" I swear to god I hear one more pen click or stupid comment we will have our very first work accident and there will be no one to claim it to.
What's in a Name?Giphy
Assistant forwarded me a call from a friend/colleague of mine. She got one syllable of my friend's name wrong which wasn't a big deal. The friend and I are working on a big deal so she's called multiple times since then. My assistant has got her name wrong every time and despite me correcting her each time, the corruptions are getting further from the mark.
Happened again yesterday, the worst butchering of the name yet. I wanted to yell at her, but I took a breath and I said "her name is XX. When you consistently say her name wrong it sounds like you're insulting her. I know you're not trying to insult her but she is a personal friend and she brings us a lot of business so please do try to get it right."
I don't think I could have handled that better, but she flipped out at me, then told a bunch of the other staff about what a fool I am. Ugh.
we as a management team just waived our annual increase to make sure there was enough for all of our employees.
as we're giving them their annual reviews, raises and new salary info, they don't know we're not getting anything this year.
An inbox full of emails followed by text messages asking if I got the email 2 minutes after it was sent followed by a phone call asking if I got the text message just as the text message notification pops up. The phone call then covers all the information from the email and the text message.
Calm. the. hell. down.
Musical Employeessmh GIFGiphy
Management is to cheap to pay for another worker so the responsibility is passed to a different person every night. It goes against the policy and procedures of the place but they don't care.
The sole developer of an application that electrical engineers for some of the biggest companies (Apple, Samsung, Toshiba, etc.) around the world rely on is on a month long adventure in Africa. I am currently the only person maintaining the application and I was given access to the repository just 5 days before the creator became unavailable.
My gluten allergy did me dirty. Boss just told me that she's actually going to take the time I spent in my bathroom out of my paycheck. Thank god this is my last week.
Edit: wow guys thank you for all the support! I'm so glad people actually care about issues like these because it's a real problem.
A friend of mine just got a settlement of $13,000 for being fired over a health related issue, which they were aware of when she was hired. It's nice change.
Problems in the Starsbbc two space GIF by BBCGiphy
Astronomer here! I submitted my PhD (yay!) and it turns out part of the process in the country where this is happening (The Netherlands) is I have to pay to get over a hundred copies of my thesis. The department actually recommends 200-300, because "you'll want to give one to everyone in the department, and send them to luminaries in your field, and just save them in case someone wants one in the future..."
Meanwhile everyone not from the Netherlands will stare at you funny if you say this and say they maybe printed out one copy for their parents and another for their adviser because, you know, we have the internet now. Which I 100% agree with; this mainly seems like a great way to kill trees. Unfortunately for the trees though I've realized getting your doctorate is a "their ball, their bat, their rules" situation, and 400 years of tradition doesn't budge easily, so I'm just gonna have to print the damn things. Sooooo stupid!
What's Up Doc?
I work in a state psychiatric hospital.
The "Doctors" are incompetent and just view it as a puff job to settle into. We treat the patients like crap. We don't treat them, we just feed them drugs. The admin is more concerned with keeping the crappy decision makers happy than actually trying to do what the institution is tasked to do.
And i got in trouble for asking the dietary director "why do you make 200 servings of potatoes for 75 patients".
I have own personal sales targets and my branch has an overall target to hit.
My yearly sales target is around £1.2m and with less than a month to go I am currently at £1.8m but the branch fell short 800k.
Everytime in my branch's sales team hit their personal targets too, the branch heavily relies on other sectors sales for specific products for the remainder.
So due to other areas of the company not pulling their weight, my team now look like we're not doing our jobs and are getting crap from HO even though the figures are there in black and white.
Overall this means that there is no 20% payrise and I'll have to keep scraping the barrel for another year just to keep living.
The First 38...
Got a 4th job to help manage bills, save up and pay off some debt. Job pays very well and hourly too, consisting of writing on a topic I'm very passionate about and love to discuss with people and share knowledge on. I already have plenty written for my own personal use and this company basically wants to license me to use it and have me write more.
First 38 hours of work is creating hyperlinks in my sources. Copy article name, paste into Google, click PubMed link, find full-text article or copy DOI into SciHub, copy link, paste into source, copy article name, create hyperlink. Rinse and repeat, for 38 freaking hours.
Not what I imagined myself doing.
The Voicemimi faust tone GIF by VH1Giphy
Accidentally mentioned to my boss that my relationship was ending. He just asked me about it in front of my coworkers, and I got a stern talking to for the tone of voice I used when I told him I'd prefer not to talk about it.
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It's never fun to watch someone dig their own grave. While it might inspire a sense of "gee, glad that's not me!" it still leaves a lasting impression on you.
People are usually doing the best they can with what they have. And sometimes that best is truly not enough to get them through the day in one piece. Sadly, if you work with them, you're beholden to this horror show, too.
These are their stories.