My life of the party people are dead and depressed. Cheers...
Yin & Yang
We Did It Win GIF by HBO MaxGiphy"One’s a doctor, one lives in a towable caravan."
Low_Corner_9061
"There doesn't seem to be a lot of middle ground in this thread."
space_monster
Tabs Up
"Worked at a bar in college, and friends worked at other bars. So I knew a lot of people who drank a lot. Most went on to be in sales or some other job where interpersonal communication skills are more valued than raw academic skills. Some do very well."
AmigoDelDiabla
"Bartended full or part time for 15 years now. It's funny those same people keep coming in to drink, but now it's with coworkers and clients and rack up huge tabs and tip the best."
Minimum_Attitude6707
Drink to the Top
"He drank with the right executives at a conference and got offered a job. He now makes three times what I do."
Moctor_Drignall
"I know someone this happened to as well! Our senior year I think she drunk-tweeted something and a company loved what she tweeted that they offered her a job. We graduated 11 years ago and she still works for them! (Although this kind of goes against the thread because she doesn't drink anywhere near as much anymore since she got married and started a family)."
PAKMan1988
Genius
"Ran into an old friend who was like that. We were in our late 30s when that happened and chatted; turned out he partied hard until late 30s and during that time, flitted around job to job to simply fund his partying. One day he looked around and noticed that he was the old guy at the bars hanging with early 20-somethings."
"He realized that all of the folks our age were ahead in their careers, with family/kids etc. Said that was a pretty sobering revelation and enrolled himself back into school and was in his 2nd year of engineering as he wanted to be an aerospace engineer."
rudebish
The Right Way
golden globes GIFGiphy"He partied with the right guys and now makes very good money in sales where he parties with clients but the company pays for it."
MySonHas2BrokenArms
Sometimes vodka works you all the way to the corner office. I'm on my way...
Never took off...
Drunk Vince Vaughn GIF by HBO MaxGiphy"He decided to do a commercial pilot license. Spent so much money on the training and the partying that his debts overtook him. Here, most airlines don't accept pilot candidates with outstanding debts or criminal records. He never got to fly a plane. He still owes a lot of people small to medium amounts of money. Accepted a menial job writing technical manuals."
Ruggiard
The Mess
"I lived in a house with a bunch of guys. One of them was in electrical engineering. He got a job at Applebees for some extra cash and started having parties with work people after work (so 3-5am). That made it hard to make class so he dropped a semester."
"We all graduated and he said he would refocus on school soon, but he was having too much fun partying. I went back to college 20 years later for a football game. He is still working as a waiter at Applebees. He is the creepy guy who acts like he is best friends a with a bunch of 20 year old kids. He’s a mess."
alpacasarebadsingers
Tragic
"He never stopped. He continued drinking at a crazy pace, and lost his job, his driving license, and his wife. He had to move near to a liquor store to keep drinking. He was found dead on the floor of his apartment from a hemorrhage in his stomach caused by years of alcohol abuse. He bled to death from within. He left behind two sons."
SpaceLaserPilot
'dedicated party house'
"A friend of mine in college pulled a Van wilder, and spent 7 total years in college (just getting his undergrad) because he liked the partying so much. He lived in the college 'dedicated party house' that had just two modes, actively throwing a wild party, or recovering from the latest party."
"What was wild about him was that even though he lived a party lifestyle, he got excellent grades and took phenomenal care of himself (when he wasn't getting black out wasted and having weird sexcapades), and was the person who got me into running/marathoning."
"Eventually, he finally graduated with a degree in Mechanical engineering, moved to the east coast, got married and became a born again Christian. He seems happy and successful and just had his first kid recently, but its absolutely weird seeing him post pictures of him getting adult baptized and doing mission work."
GlastonBerry48
Unrecognizable
Sad Lonely GIF by PokémonGiphy"He overdosed, blacked out and fell off a balcony at a hotel and hit the pavement so hard his mother couldn’t recognize him."
Impressive-Orchid748
The party has to end sometime. When the lights come on... go home. That's clearly a general life lesson as well.
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The Loft
read suicide squad GIFGiphyMy 3rd grade class had a "reading loft". It was a pretty good sized "fort" (probably taking up 1/3 of the classroom) covered in carpet and had lots of cool places to hang out if you wanted to read. The teacher incentivized us to finish work early so we could grab a book and head to the "reading loft" so we didn't have to hang out at our desks being bored.
One day in math.....
I got bullied a lot in middle school. One day in math I'd just been overwhelmed and couldn't take anymore so I called my dad and begged him to pick me up. He told me I'd be alright and just ignore it. 20 minutes later I got called to the office for check out and he took me to get my favorite food and spent the afternoon in the park with me. RIP old man, that was one of the best days of my entire life.
Being Strange....
In third grade, it was some reading appreciation week, and we decided as a class to visit a cemetery. Granted it's a pretty famous cemetery with a couple of really important people buried there, and we had a scavenger hunt to find them. Along with like the oldest grave we could find, the biggest, and we had to make a rubbing of one of our choosing. As a strange child, it was the best field trip I had ever been on.
Can you hear me now?
can you hear me now GIF by BET AwardsGiphyWhen I was in second grade, I got bullied because my whole family was deaf. One kid kept picking on me everyday. Well one day he came up to me and started screaming, saying can your mom hear me, and this tall girl stepped in and punched him in the face. She got suspended, but no one ever made fun of me again. We became best friends after that.
You're Exiled.
I got banned from reading in class because I'd finish my work early and pull out a book. The teachers would always say I wouldn't pay attention.
So I started writing and doodling. Then the teachers started confiscating my pencil and paper, saying I wouldn't pay attention.
So I'd read ahead in the textbook instead. Then the teachers started holding my textbooks when I didn't immediately need them, saying I wouldn't pay attention.
So when I'd finish my classwork I'd just dissociate and spend the rest of the hour staring at empty space. It was not particularly healthy, and it definitely has had a permanent effect on me.
Hey Ho! Let's Go!
I was always a shy introvert and when I went off to high school I made it a goal to do one thing during my 4 years there that would force me out of my comfort zone. I ended up trying out for the cheerleading team. I was definitely not the type to get up in front of a crowd and cheer. The tryouts involved performing a personally choreographed dance which was no issue as I had some dance background.
They allowed those who wanted to try out to perform their dances in groups, but since I had no friends I did it alone. I was so damn nervous but I did it and I made the team! The rest of my high school experience pretty much sucked but that one thing made me really proud of myself.
Ask Dave...
I had a young teacher who was maybe a year or two out of school himself. He asked if he set his own car on fire at a Dave Matthew concert, would it be illegal. I told him that it would be. He thought since it was his property he could destroy it. I had to point out, yes, but it is disorderly conduct. Then I had one teacher who played minor league baseball for years. He was very good looking.
It was a private, Catholic school and they paid crap. I know because another math teacher wrote a problem on the board and muttered the people in the problem with a lemonade stand were finally people who made less than him. High school was a strange time!
Gossip Queen...
shocked new girl GIFGiphyA math teacher paused a class because he got a message from his brother. His brother met a girl at a party and had a crush on her, but he found a week later that she was lesbian and got a heartbreak. He went outside to call his brother and came back and told us the story.
Safe from Chocolate....
Every morning my teacher will ask us questions about history if we get it right he would give us a snicker bar. But this the funny part, he would throw the snickers bar at us real hard. So if get the question right you would had to dodge the fast moving snickers.
Straight Up!
stand up 80s GIFGiphyWatching my mother rip the principal a new one because a typing teacher failed me for poor posture despite my having 100% on every assignment plus bonus marks.
Mom ranked up that day.
The Jump
In high school we had a group project and this class was 90% girls so the other 10% guys (including me) were in a group. This teacher used to kinda gang up on us with the girls and one day she was preoccupied and we were talking about how we didn't want to be there and we should just jump out the window.
This one guy scopes out the window, sticks his feet out first, give us a wink and just jumps out. Dropped probably 7-10 feet onto the grass and just waltzes back into class like he just came from the bathroom or something. Teacher didn't even notice.
"sex equals fun"
Sexy Jessica Alba GIFGiphyOne of my math teachers in high school was a bit on the crazy side in a very good way.
He'd scoot around the room on his desk chair, rolling over backpacks and the like. He'd punctuate talks with weird sayings like "but, but, but, he said, which is tub spelled backwards." He generally made the class time entertaining for everyone.
One day, he decided to show us the derivation of a mathematical formula. Nowadays, showing this particular formulation to a bunch of high school students would likely get him kicked out.
I don't remember the exact derivation, but the end result was "the integral of e to the x power equals some function of u to the nth power." Written out, it looks like this:
Sex = f(u)n
Yes, he went through a whole mathematical derivation just to tell a group of high school students "sex equals fun."
C-
I was a terrible student and a huge baseball fan growing up. In 6th grade I had an English teacher who knew I wasn't dumb, just hard to motivate. She privately offered me an extra credit assignment, all I had to do was write a 2 page essay on any topic I liked at all explaining why I liked it so much. I straight up turned down her offer, being content with my C- grade.
So she flipped it around on me and publicly told another guy in my class that since HE was the biggest Red Sox fan in the class, he should write a 2 page essay about the Red Sox and present it to the class. I practically jumped out of my seat and said I was a way bigger Red Sox fan than Mike and I should be the one writing that essay. She let us both write one. She was a really good teacher.
Miss you Mr Pitchford.
Reminds me of my history teacher in my first 2 years at secondary school. He hummed and spoke in rhyme and called the class his 'little chickadees'. He was a fun teacher who I only saw genuinely angry twice. He had kinder egg toys on his desk.
He grew his beard every 5 years and shaved it off for charity.
He had a heart attack and fell down the stairs in our last year at school and supposedly had another not long after we left. No idea if that awesome teacher is still alive, he wasn't that old, if alive I expect he would be around 60-70 now.
Miss you Mr Pitchford.
Wizards & Turtles....
Nickelodeon took over my school when I was in the 2nd grade. We were the first school to win and it was because a girl at my school who was a few grades older entered the contest. All the Nickelodeon celebrities were there - Mr. Wizard did cool science experiments, Barth did gross stuff with food, Marc Sommers had the super sloppy double dare obstacle course we could go through, teachers got slimed, and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles put on a concert. It was literally a dream come true. And then at the end we all got free backpacks filled with Nickelodeon swag. I still think about that day.
The Journey...
Going to an inter school sports competition. Our school would participate every year and we would come last without fail!
I took part for 8 years during which we never won ANYTHING (just got a participation certificate).
While going to the competition we would play games on the bus, listen to songs, eat at fast food joints.
Looking back I don't remember the many losses that our team endured but the time that we spent together is still crystal clear.
It was never about the destination.... it is all about the sweet journey.
Thanks Dad....
fathers day dad GIFGiphyWatching my stepdad call the principal of my school in 4th grade out on his bullcrap right in front of me. Because it was the first time I had a father figure in my life who cared enough about me to stand up for me.
Detention Rocks!
I got in trouble for calling my English teacher out on an incorrect Harry Potter fact she was spouting one day. (Granted, I was a little fool and was also refusing to do the work she assigned, but I was done with her BS.) Principal decided to give me detention as punishment.
Thing is, detention involved an hour or so of homework/reading time before a period where we were to help the host teacher with whatever tasks they needed. I was a book nerd, and the host teachers were both science teachers who I got along with swimmingly. Plus, they wanted help with cleaning the fish tank.
Needless to say, those days of detention were AWESOME.
I just remember the principal's face when he asked me how detention was going. Apparently, being excited to go back was not what he expected.
Middle of the winter.
Oh boy it was a few months before corona. Middle of the winter. It was so cold that I guess the morning due froze and so the floor was kind of frosted over. I'm late to school riding my bike as fast as I could. I arrived but my class was kinds far. So I run for it determined to make it on time. I go up the stairs of the 800 building which is outside of the building and run to my class.
I'm running. Then I notice I'm about to run right past the class who were all outside. I make an abrupt stop, but the frosted floor has other plans. I slide about a good six ft while still standing. Everybody's watching me in awe. I didn't fall down. It was epic.
Edit: btw I made it on time
Fill it Up....
patrick eating GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphyWatching a freshman attempting to deepthroat 7 cheese sticks at once.
The record for most milk cartons drank before throwing up was 26 by the time I graduated. They started suspending anyone who tried to break the record because they were cleaning up milk puke so often.
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And it's not always the students doing the bizarre and grotesque behaviors. Often, a teacher is the unnerving presence, dropping strange foreboding clues until some bombshell discovery comes out.
And then there are the outside agents, the people not affiliated with the school who drop in just long enough to put everyone on edge, or worse.
This Reddit thread reminds that for all of school's mundanity, occasionally something arises to put everyone on their heels.
twatomexus asked, "What is the most disturbing thing to happen at your school?"
"Calm, Sadistic"
"School dismissed one day and as the students were leaving one of the 8th grade English classes, one of the students stayed behind alone to meet privately with the teacher. Said he had a surprise for her, 'A good surprise,' he assured."
"She thought it was awkward how much he was struggling to get it out of his backpack. As soon as she looked up, she realizes that her 'surprise' was an 8 inch butcher knife. The student stabbed her in the chest and punctured her lung."
"Violence in our local schools of course was never unheard of, but the weapon of choice and the calm, sadistic nature of that attack took the cake."
-- ladyyyyyyy
What is it about 8th Grade?
"In 8th grade a boy who was known to be a trouble kid was sent to the principal's office. Before the principal could send him to in school suspension, the boy picked up a metal stool and bashed the principal over the head. The principal needed over 100 sutures to close the wound but came back to the school to finish the year before transferring to a different school system.
"The boy was arrested for murder our sophomore year. He's on death row now."
A Classic, Horrible Story
"Gym teacher would 'massage' girls' legs after class so they 'wouldn't get sore later.' That's gross alone, but he was recently fired for grooming them to date him."
"One victim apparently won't testify because she's 'in love' with him."
The "Adult in the Room"
"A boy decided to mess around near the glass display case, he bumped into it and the whole pane fell over his and lacerated his arm down to the bone. There was a sea of blood on the floor and glass everywhere."
"Our gym teacher, who was a gym bro dude, got squeamish and passed out."
-- Bison_Eyes
Impervious Frats
"Some frat got in trouble for pouring boiling water on their pledges. Just kidding, they didn't get in any trouble. A few guys were arrested but all charges were dropped, and the frat is still active today." -- golf43
"A fraternity was doing an annual event where they dive into a cold pond on campus and holler a lot. It was called off half-way through when one of the bros found a decaying corpse hidden in the murky water." -- vorpal_potato
It Stops Being Silly When Someone's Got a Sledgehammer
"Some pants-less lady walked into the school's quad area holding a sledgehammer during my lunch period and started screaming about how "GOD IS COMING" and proceeded to put said hammer through a couple windows. Eventually, the custodian managed to pin her down and she was arrested."
"I was in the library at the time and when the bell rang got to witness the chaos. At least no one got hurt."
-- LilMoi
A Complete Escalation
"The tennis coach at my high school was always kinda weird. He'd pay a little too much attention to the girls on the team, wink at them in the hallways, general creepy things like that."
"My sister was on the team during her sophomore year and one day he brought a chainsaw to practice and chased students around with it while it was running."
"Obviously it freaked everyone out and my mom called the athletic director to report it, along with several other parents.They investigated the incident and he "resigned" a week later."
"He died of cancer several years later, I've always wondered why he brought the chainsaw."
Like Clockwork
"USA: Every year around 9/11 an old man would circle the school (on foot) and shout Islamophobic things. We could hear/ see him from the windows and always had to be on soft lockdown bc of it." -- the_cumsquat
"America is so f***ed up man." -- fredbuddle
Would Never Pee Again
"One of my friends told me that his friend went to the bathroom at school one time and looked up and saw a man looking at him from an open spot in the ceiling. It turned out to be a homeless man that had been living in the school for a while." -- yeeb0p
"I shi**ed my pants and had to look up my ceiling wall." -- 80mebcdy_
Explosive Vandelism
"I don't know if this is disturbing but in the computer science room someone jammed metal pieces in the outlets under a few tables and every time someone bumped a cord plugged into the metal filled socket(which was often) sparks would shoot out everywhere.
"After a while the teacher found the outlets and when trying to unplug a cord to reach the metal pieces sparks shot all over the floor and almost hit people all around the spot. It was an interesting time."
-- sandworm45
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