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People Reveal The Dumbest Reason They Ever Had To Go To The E.R.

"Reddit user lugulaga asked: 'What is the stupidest reason you went to hospital?'"

Paramedics load a patient into an ambulance
Photo by Mat Napo

Everyone is a bit leery of hospitals.

Even people who have to work there would rather be somewhere else most of the time.

But sometimes, a trip to the hospital is unavoidable.

More specifically, a trip to the ER.

We humans can really get ourselves into some ridiculous health-related situations.

All you can do is try to laugh about it.

And be grateful you lived so you can tell the silly story.

Redditor lugulaga wanted everyone to fess about the times their ER visits were more embarrassing than painful, so they asked:

"What is the stupidest reason you went to the hospital?"

I do my best to stay away from the ER.

I'll even suffer in silence.

Especially if I'm being an idiot.

Intractable

Giphy

"Hiccups that lasted 24 hrs, stopped right when the doctor stepped in the room. Lol."

stargill70

"I’ve seen this a lot. Had a guy last Monday. 'Intractable hiccups.' Fun note: we use Thorazine to treat it. As in the anti-psychotic."

W6RJC

Down the Hatch

"Not me but I had to pick up a mate who swallowed a 50c piece to win a $2 bet. If you don't know, an Australian 50c is quite large. They had to do an endoscopy to get it out. They let him keep the black corroded coin too."

honest-aussie

"My son did this but with an American 25¢ quarter. He had it in his mouth but inhaled it. It was stuck sideways in his airway so luckily he could breathe. They had to put him under and got it out via endoscopy."

"He spent 9 hours with it in his airway and hardly spoke at all. That is the quietest he has ever been since he learned to speak. He was about 9 when this happened, he is autistic, though very high functioning, and was sensory seeking which is why it was in his mouth."

kaismama

While I Sleep

"A bat landed on my head while I was asleep. Rabies shots all around!"

olda**hit

"Ugh, my child had a 'mystery bite' from daycare that we ignored until it started looking infected. Doctors asking about animals and specifying bats-- reminds me that LAST YEAR the daycare had bats removed that were living in the roof but had no sighting since then."

But I said it. So they had to do the rabies shots, including IGG injected directly into the infected bite... on a 2-year-old. Most traumatizing experience of my life... thank goodness she doesn't remember!"

overweightthrowaway3

A Hard WInd

"My husband went because he was in extreme pain and thought he was having a heart attack. Turns out it was wind. He just needed a good fart."

blueboatsky

"I took my 1-week-old son to urgent care because he had abdominal pain for hours and hours. He cried in the waiting room for a couple more hours, then farted three times and immediately fell asleep."

"They called us in about 10 minutes after that. The doctor said, "As long as you guys are here, let's see how he's doing" and gave him the standard well-baby check. I thought that was nice."

EvadingDoom

Not the Thumb

big bang theory paper cut GIFGiphy

"When I was 8 I was bored so I got a bottle of Gatorade from my pantry and grabbed a kitchen knife then proceeded to stab it over the sink to see how easily the knife would go through the thicker plastic of the bottle… almost lost my thumb."

New_Moon_Lotus

Kids and kitchen knives, a most deadly combination.

Merry Nothing

Freak Out Running GIF by TLCGiphy

"Christmas Day, I dislocated my knee attempting to kick my brother during a sparring match. Needless to say, my martial arts career was over."

IDontThereforeIAmNot

Broken

"I was at a house party, all the bathrooms were full. Went outside, and decided I should crawl under the porch to pee. Everything went well until I tripped on the way out and rolled my ankle. Shrugged it off, limped back upstairs and someone said 'Your ankle is broken.' Sure enough, bone sticking out. DD took me to the hospital and got me ice cream on the way home. I miss you, Kyle. You're the best."

Ubermassive

Knobbed

"Butt cheek injuries caused by a door. I hate touching door knobs with my hands and always use my forearm to rub against the doorknob in a downward motion using friction to turn the knob. Was joking around with my gf saying I can open a door with my buttcheek exactly like how I use my forearm. Jumped at the door butt first and the little metal thing that guides the door cut my buttcheek (I think they call it strike plate or latch strike)."

"The cut wasn’t a clean cut because the thing wasn’t that sharp. 30+ stitches."

"After that, she had to stand behind me holding a bowl to cover my wound every time I take a shower so it doesn’t get wet, and we live in a hot country so she has to do that twice a day for like a month."

Normal-Focus9248

We did Nothing...

"I’m an ER doctor. About once a year I see a very nice young female who comes to the ER with three or four family members because her fingers are blue. They have always googled all sorts of fancy and exotic diseases that they are worried about. 100% of the time the patient has brand-new blue jeans on."

"Without saying a word I just grab an alcohol swab and wipe the blue dye off of their hands, and then I do the same thing to their jeans to show them it’s the same color. The collective sigh from the family is always what does it for me. Not surprisingly, half the time the patient doesn’t believe me and is angry that 'we did nothing.'"

Dan-z-man

All Sewed Up

Tongue Out GIF by MOODMANGiphy

"When I was about 3, I was running up the stairs in my house and fell. I hit my chin on a step and bit my tongue nearly off. My parents took me to the local hospital where they sewed up the gash in my tongue without anesthetic. I still remember it to this day."

Salty_Fixer

I feel faint after reading all this.

Thank the Lord no one brought up any eye issues.

I'd be on the floor.

Split-Second Decisions That Saved Someone's Life

Reddit user True_Egg_5685 asked: 'What split second decision have you made in your life, that if you hadn't made it you would have died?'

Man lying on edge of tennis court OR man falling off edge of structure
Martin Sanchez/Usplash

Life can be viewed as a series of moments in quick succession each influenced by a preceding event.

At any given time, things can go awry, but somehow things manage to fall in line much like an elaborate maze of dominos.

But one misplaced domino can cause the whole rigorous set-up to come to an unsatisfying end–unless the faulty piece is corrected just in time before the domino in front of it squarely taps it.

If you've been lucky, a last-minute decision in your life has been properly adjusted to avoid catastrophe.

Curious to hear about close-call situations from strangers online, Redditor True_Egg_5685e_Egg_5685 asked:

"What split second decision have you made in your life, that if you hadn't made it you would have died?"

Life can be treacherous in the fast lane.

Unwarranted Lane Change

"Driving 80 miles per hour on a lonely interstate in the middle of the night. Decided to change lanes for no reason, and ended up missing a crumpled car in the middle of the lane I just left. It looked like a professionally crushed car that had fallen off of a truck. No light lenses or reflectors."

– Upper-Job5130

Unseen Obstacle

"I was driving through Dallas on I-20 at like 2am once and had a similar experience. No other cars, just me doing 80mph, and I just absentmindedly changed from the middle to the right lane for no real reason. Suddenly there's a blacked out sedan just parked in the middle lane, no lights on and no people in sight. I thought I was hallucinating, it happened so fast."

– glum_hedgehog

Why Coffee Is Essential

"Fell asleep at the wheel, woke up and corrected my steering without panicking."

"Drowsy driving is just as dangerous as drunk driving. Never again !"

– Nielas_Aran_76

T"his happened to me when I was in my late teens. I was burning both ends of the stick and was driving home from working and falling asleep. I remember it so clearly. Nodding off, waking and being thankful I didn't crash and then nodding right back off again. I'm amazed I didn't kill myself. I did eventually hit a divider and popped two tires. I must've been going very fast. I don't know why I'm not dead."

– boringcranberry

You never know when a pedestrian is where they shouldn't be. Or when a car is traveling where it shouldn't.

Wayward Wanderer

"I'm from Northern Ireland and my brother and I were coming home from a night out, he was the designated driver. We were doing 70mph on the motorway and he moved into the fast lane and missed a guy walking on the motorway, dressed in black, by about a foot. So scary 😰."

– garymason74

Reckless Driver

"Grabbing a middle schooler's backpack as she was about to cross without looking and staying on the sidewalk instead of crossing the road. (I was in high school at the time)"

"The reason?"

"The red car that had almost ran me over a few weeks before was barrelling down the street at high speed."

"Car zooms past at the moment the kid and myself would have been in the middle of the road."

"Same driver. I recognized the shade of blonde hair."

– MerryMelody-Symphony

These people survived a terrorist attack.

At The Time Of Signing

"Was in a bombing. Knelt down to sign something when the detonation happened. Glass shards were a hair away from killing me. The person who gave me the paper to sign technically saved me, they’re fine too."

– PinkBedazzledLeotard

"Story time! My grandfathers family lived in Halifax at the time. My great uncle George was a newborn. They had him in his pram facing the window. For some reason my aunt went in and turned his pram around so it wasn't facing the window anymore, then she left the room. As she was leaving the room, the windows blew in. If she hadn't turned the pram he would have been shredded by glass."

– Lexifer31

These individuals continue counting their blessings.

Retrieving A Forgotten Item

"I went to ride my bike and almost forgot my helmet, I honestly debated grabbing it since I was only planning on doing a few miles; last minute I decided I might as well have it and then half a mile out I got hit by a car. Helmet was busted as hell but other than a concussion I was fine"

– SunfireElfAmaya

Narrow Missssssss

"Nowhere near as extreme as some of these, but I used to go for walks in a nature park right behind my neighborhood, usually with headphones. On one such walk, I happened to look down to see the foot I was currently stepping with was about 6 inches from coming down on a diamondback rattlesnake. It was arched back, ready to strike, rattle going, but I couldn't hear it over my music. Leapt back immediately and walked around it without issue, but holy crap, it gets my heart going just thinking about it."

– pownij

Life-Saving Maneuver

"I was caught in a bar brawl. Tumbled to the bottom of a crowd and was pressed to the floor when some psycho was on my back choking me. Couldn't move and couldn't breathe. I thought that was it. I was gonna die on the floor of a New Jersey nightclub. Suddenly I remembered a move my wrestling coach taught us to break grips. I found his thumb, folded it like a fist and squeezed as hard as I could. It cracked like a stick. I could hear him scream in my ear and he hopped off. I pushed up and swung my way out. I was choked so hard that both of my eyes were full blood red, no whites and I cracked a molar. That was a close one and who knows what would have happened if I didn't recall that one random move or if I never wrestled to begin with. Scary."

– Ghostface5000

A moment that still sends shivers down my spine was when I nearly avoided a head-on collision with an 18-wheeler that had been zig-zagging between the different sides of a busy street.

The presumably drunk driver was speeding and towards me and I had to decide whether to swerve into the parked cars on the street or steer the other way and risk driving into cars careening toward me.

I decided for the former and turned the steering wheel towards the parked cars, just as the truck clipped the back corner of my Nissan Maxima.

My vehicle spun 180, but thankfully, I managed to slam onto the curb where no cars were parked.

The semi-kept going. It was a hit-and-run. And I count my blessings that I live to tell about the fact that I didn't steer my wheel towards the left which would've had me on a collision course, head-on, into the semi.

The Most Unusual Ways People Have Almost Died
Photo by Sandy Millar

I've lost track of the number of times I've averted death.

One of the most unusual was death by a dog.

My dog is small.

And she loves to sneak up on people.

She loves sneaking up on me the most.

I've explained that I need her to stop.

Especially after she popped out of a closet at the top of the stairs.

I swear I heard God whisper hello in the split second from when I tripped to miraculously being able to grab the handrail.

I've tried to tell her that she's not in the will, so lay off.

All of my other near deaths are car incidents and bad dates.

Care to share?

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We all... could be a Dateline NBC villain.

Life pushes us.

Of course, there are also times when accidents happen and we prove life is fragile.

One never knows what actions they will one day be responsible for.

More deep breaths should be taken.

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As humans with autonomy and knowledge, we try to protect ourselves as much as we can. However, accidents do happen, and while we can expect the unexpected, we can't always protect ourselves from it.

Because there isn't always a defense, people sometimes have a close brush with death. They experience something that could've killed them but, by some miracle... didn't.

More people have stories like that than we expect.

Redditors are no exception and, in fact, were eager to share their close calls.

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