The infamous Mortal Kombat ABACABB code doesn't actually work in real life, but there are absolutely times when some overly dramatic poorly-rendered game blood would make a moment way funnier.
We could use it for educational purposes, or in trauma reduction.
Ted the Feminist might even still have a girlfriend!
Sometimes a sense of humor is all you've got left, ya know?
Hilarious as that could get - if cheat codes actually DID work, we can think of quite a few we'd try before that one. Sorry, Ted.
Reddit user citizen287 asked:
"What is a real life cheat code you use?"
Instead, we're just stuck with these "real life cheat codes" from people who are somehow good at life or whatever.
Look It UpGIF by The SimpsonsGiphy
"When I hear a word I cannot define, I stop whatever I am doing and look it up."
"You would be amazed how that helps you understand the world around you and all aspects of it, especially finances."
"You are absolutely right."
"It was the philosopher Wittgenstein who said: 'The limits of my language means the limits of my world.' “
"In other words, your field of experience of the world will increase as you become more competent in learning language, vocabulary, words and definitions."
"Wait, I thought everyone just did that? How else would you understand the sentence or whatever"
"When you decide to use a teaspoon instead of a tablespoon for ice cream or yoghurt or pretty much anything."
"It gives you more bites, forces you to take more time to enjoy something, really savor it -- and I think that's pretty special."
"I only use small dishes and utensils for the past few years :) Makes a huge difference!"
"Completely agree with you!"
"I have tons of little spoons specifically for that reason, so I can savor what I’m eating instead of gobbling it down right there"
"Agreed. Except cereal, which requires bigger bites so it doesn't get soggy."
Thoughtful NotesTaking Notes GIFGiphy
"Keep a list of things people love or want."
"It comes in super handy during birthdays and Christmas."
"I always get complimented on how thoughtful my gifts are. A little planning goes a long way."
"My brother decided to create a Google sheet for all of us."
"We each have our own tab, and after Sept 1, no one is allowed to look at their own tab, because the rest of us make changes to it to indicate what was bought."
"He got tired of all of us screaming for lists from his family."
"I do this too! As people are chatting and mention something they like, a favorite restaurant, etc I’ll remember and add it to a list in my notes app on my phone."
"I’m constantly complimented on my thoughtful gifts but I’m just listening!"
To The Left To The Left
"Whenever I have to fart/have a belly ache I lay on my left side. I did this long before actually looking up the science but apparently your GI Tract is situated in such a way that laying on your left side helps move things along."
"Same. Did it for years before understanding the reasoning why."
"Sometimes I can only burp if I lean up and to the left as well. When I was very young, I just told everyone I had a leaky chamber."
"Yeah, this one's a good tip, which I also follow. Any of you who suffer GORD or similar can use use this to take some of the edge off the burning too."
"Doesn't always work, of course; but I'll say anecdotally that I've suffered severe GORD my entire life, and sometimes just moving into this position is the only thing that brings any kind of relief, even if slight or brief."
Clean As You Gocleaning GIFGiphy
"Wash your bowls, spatulas, and so on while you are cooking. After supper you will have hardly any dishes to do."
"YES. My dad swears by this, the 'clean as you go' strategy, thus I use it in my daily life even at work and not just in the kitchen."
"My mother is a ‘leave all the dirty dishes in a pile and clean them after the food starts to cook’ human"
"I do a lot of this while I'm waiting for the food to cool down before I eat. So much nicer being able to enjoy a warm meal knowing there's no cleanup afterward."
"Also accept that you will clean your kitchen every day. It's just a law of physics."
One, Two, Three ...
"If you go into another room and forget what you came for, next time start counting in your head as you are getting up to go to the other room."
"You can think about other things but for some reason the counting keeps the original thought tied to it."
"I’m going to have to give this a try!"
"I did it all the time, I called them trigger points, basically recount your step so your head trigger and help you remember what you were doing in the first place."
Save The Zipper
"I had a pair of jeans where the zipper wouldn't stay up."
"I put a keyring through the little hole in the zipper and hooked it around the button. Zipper stays up and the keyring is hidden behind the fabric that fastens over the button."
"Saved me buying a new pair of jeans for a while. I hate buying jeans, they're the worst clothing to go shopping for."
"this is great!"
"Elastic band works too"
Let It Go
"I abandoned my ego about 11 years ago."
"Life has been immensely easier since then."
"100%. The easiest thing to do in life is to sometimes just say sorry or not have an ego about things and everything goes smoother."
"So true. The focus returns to just what needs to get done in life/work/school without the ego clouding or triggering a lot of baggage."
Don't Shed A Tearworld onion GIFGiphy
"When dicing onions, cut it in half and peel the paper then rinse it good. No tears."
"5 - 8 sec microwaving the half onions do well, too."
"Didn't know that, nice."
"You can pick up relatively anything with your toes instead of bending over."
"Yes I know it’s weird but it actually helps a lot whenever you have back issues"
"I do that, my family looks at me weird tho"
"Everyone that lives with me collectively agreed that I do not have feet, but rather four hands."
"This is a good one, I often use this especially when picking up clothes that have be put into the washing machine or something falls down and your hands are not free."
Friendly And SilentHappy Stephen Colbert GIF by The Late Show With Stephen ColbertGiphy
"Let people talk and sound friendly they will always let out more than they are willing."
"Also always start a negotiation with a positive with the other party, then you start working your way through more sensitive terms of your soon to be agreement."
"Also, make use of silence. Lots of people will be keen to fill the silence by saying something (anything!) which can give you an advantage."
"I work in an inspection and enforcement role and I have had great success with this. I am friendly and personable by nature but also as a rule. I ask open ended questions and let people talk. They will inevitability keep talking and give me all the info I need."
"I was on an inspection recently and the employer had a work term student who came along. I told him that people will almost always tell you what you want to know, you just have to give them the opportunity. It's an easy job, listen and take notes, the workers will tell you what is wrong"
"Same thing I work in a very nieche part of the legal word, which mainly deals with contracts and maneuvering and expediting things with state institutions, while I was an intern through a lot of frustration and the express course from my coworkers I sort of started developing and honing this skills, which made life 100 times easier."
Electric Kettle For The WinCelebrity Masterchef Omg GIF by MasterChefAUGiphy
"When I'm cooking, I'll boil the water in the electric kettle and then add it to the pot, so I don't have to wait as long."
"Another step to this is adding a bit of water to the pot and heating it as the kettle boils. It means that the pot is hot when you add the water from the kettle and usually goes straight back to boiling"
"I started doing this a few weeks ago! A lot faster"
"Exercise and eat well. An hour a day makes the other 23 SO MUCH INSANELY BETTER."
"I’ve been in amazing shape, then I had some medical stuff knock me down into depression/drinking/doordash every day and got fat as hell. Everything hurt. I slept like shit. People, men and women young and old treat you so much worse when you’re unattractive it’s ridiculous… snapped out of it, got back in shape, felt like myself again, body feels amazing, strangers are nice again."
"I’ve been the same person in both physical states. There is absolutely no comparison whatsoever. Life is much, much, much better as even a moderately fit person. It’s bizarre how much it effects your day to day social interactions with strangers"
"This was my cheat code when in therapy for depression and a restrictive eating disorder. I realized that even a short walk around my building complex boosted my mood a little, and that little could be enough to actually brush my hair or eat something decent. Some days were truly so awful that I couldn't bring myself to do even that, and I reached out to friends or neighbors who were kind enough to knock on my door and get me on a walk."
"For a while, cardio was one of the biggest weapons I could use against my condition, and afterwards I thought of it as just something I do a few times a week as preventative treatment."
"Actually understanding how to use google search engine."
"first tip. if you're looking for a specific quote, keyword or company and want to find only the reddit results type in first:"
"site:reddit.comthen you add in your actual query. It would look like this:"
"site:reddit.com what is a real life cheat code you use?"
"And you will be able to find this answer more easily. Google has a large variety of filtering tools to allow you search more effectively."
"You can honestly simplify it to just 'search term reddit'. So if I want to see what reddit thinks of a movie I'll do "the avengers reddit" and if I'm mostly getting memes might refine it to 'the avengers review Reddit'."
Efficient CommuteBike Drive GIF by BoschGiphy
"I ride an ebike to work. I save money. I am in better shape. And because I don’t have to go to the gym to get cardio, I save time too."
"My commute is kinda far at 8 miles one way, so the adult helps with the time and sweatiness."
"I don't know how people pull this off TBH. I get a collar of sweat walking out to the mailbox sometimes. Not horribly out of shape or anything, I just sweat a lot."
"The eBike helps a lot. You still sweat, but the 20 mph breeze evaporates it. Works better in drier climates, but I’ve been pretty happy with it in New England."
"Also, have a rack to put your bag. Wearing a backpack will keep you back sweat from evaporating. And finally, wear breathable clothes."
"That can mean wearing workout clothes & changing or I like to wear shorts that look like dress clothes but are made of breathable materials."
"I’m a notoriously sweaty dude, and it’s worked for me here and in Arizona."
"Somewhere like Miami might be different though."
AM Errand Run
"If you can, go run your errands at night. All the stores you have to go to? Do it at night.
No people, no road anxiety, just you getting shit done in (mostly) quiet. The only things I go out in the daytime for are doctor's and dentist appointments."
"i would not recommend this to anybody that isn't a man or at the very least cant physically defend themselves"
"As a woman, I've found that if I shop before 9am, I feel completely safe. And most people dont want to be up that early so the stores are mostly empty and I dont have to stand in absurdly long lines to buy my groceries, gas, or fast food."
"i work nights so i too do most of my shopping in the mornings and can confirm the lines are almost non existent"
"Fair. It depends on where you live. I live in a city where the downtown area is sketchy and full of druggies, but all the big-box stores are about 5-10 minutes away in a (generally) safer area. Haven't gotten attacked yet and I'm a woman. But other areas are far more dangerous regardless of store placement."
Two Out Of Three
"Neil Gaiman's trio:"
"Submit quality work"
"Submit work punctually"
"Be pleasant to communicate with"
"...you only need two out of three."
"Over my academic career,"
"I've submitted absolute dogshit, but it was on time and I was polite about it."
"I've submitted requirements really late, but it was good work and I was apologetic about it."
"I can sort of ignore messages and be blunt in communication as long as I submit good work on time."
"Pretty much every professor has allowed me to submit at least one late assignment because I'm polite and participate class"
"I had one professor for 4 semesters and got As in all his classes. I had him for one more class a year later and was like 'Hey I know this assignment is 3 weeks late but I'm gonna go ahead and submit it now' and he was just like 'yeah that's cool' and gave me full credit"
"My dad used to quote a variation on that regarding buying products/services:"
"You can get it quick"
"You can get quality"
"You can get it cheap"
"I agree with this but I feel like punctuality outweighs the other factors in certain situations where the proctor is anal. I’ve experienced many situations throughout my degree in which I couldn’t submit assignments 10 minutes past the deadline even though the quality was great and I was as nice as I could possibly be."
"Although that’s pretty situational. Usually proctors aren’t total d*cks."
"I’ve gotten a 50% raise doing exactly this in my first year after graduation. It really works and it’s really easy, as long as you have integrity."
Night Hydrationsaturday night live drinking GIF by globaltvGiphy
"Drinking water before you go to bed on a night out is the only way to prevent or diminish an inevitable morning hangover, especially useful if you work early."
"You're hangover is the result of you being dehydrated, you don't need to drink a gallon, even just a pint will save you from a day of headache hell"
"If you foeget drinking more than normal at breakfast also works just fyi"
"I really don't think it works as well, as a seasoned drinker I can say drinking before you go to sleep works much better"
"You are right, it doesn't. You get the morning headache. But it doesn't last all day"
"This is true. Also if you're going straight to sleep after there's no point drinking more than a pint cause apparently your body can't process that much water at once so most won't be absorbed anyway."
We may not be able to use video game cheat codes, but if you're nailing it at life and have a cheat the rest of us can use, share it in the comments.
Please? Seriously, 2022 is a mess and we need all the help we can get.
Cheating. It happens in every classroom, in every school. Some students are crafty and get away with it. Others take bold approaches that backfire spectacularly - like stealin an entire Wikipedia article and then citing the same article. Teachers have Google too, you're gonna get caught.
MCMax49 asked schoolteachers of Reddit: What is the stupidest way you've seen someone try and cheat?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Cheaters never prosper. That's a lie! Cheaters often win and often walk away with no remorse and sometimes that's ok. Life is one long, arduous game of survival. And more often than not it's imperative to find your way around by maybe cutting an edge out for yourself. When you know a few things about the outcome prior to the finish you can handle the terrain with a touch more ease. And I'm not ashamed to championing that!
Redditor u/SunZuu wanted everyone to fess up and admit to a thing or three by asking... What are some cheat codes you've found in the game of life?