You got to have friends.
There are shows about the beauty of friendships.
There are shows about the downfall of those connections.
I think we should focus more on the downfall.
We often turn a blind eye to the people we can and have called friends.
That can be a big mistake.
Don't let loneliness lead you.
Sometimes people just have to go.
Redditor dragonXgal wanted to know what signs we should look out for when it comes to certain "besties."
So they asked:
"What are red flags in a friendship most people brush away?"
Friends who never ask about you... or ask but then only listen long enough to turn the convo back to them.
I hate that.
Walk slow...
Owl Creeping GIFGiphy"Continually feeling like you want to say something but should hold your tongue."
WilletteKinoshita
"This, have to walk on eggshells around them. Can't really communicate with them because they will take everything personally and blow it out of proportion."
kryptonite753
Tick Tick Boom...
"When you hang out with them it feels like you're defusing a bomb when theres nothing going on right then."
thedialupgamer
"I had to let go of my 'best friend' because of this. With my real friends I could always just respond to a text message with the first thing I thought of. With this girl I felt like I had to carefully consider what I was saying and then reword it several times before I could hit send because I didn’t want to be dismissed or berated in any way. That’s not friendship."
By Nature
"Really jealous and possesive friends. I'm a jealous person by nature, and even though my jealousy flares up when I see my friends hanging out with other people, I would never let them know. Why? Because I don't want them to feel bad about doing the things they love (eg. having a social life outside my little world)."
"If a person tries to box you up because they want you all to themselves, it's not a proof of love or companionship. True love (in any kind of relationship like friends, family, lovers) is shown by respect and allowing the other person to have free will."
lovecraftianslu*t
Liked Most
"Friends who are good to you when one on one but constantly put you down In group settings. This is a big sign of insecurity/jealousy. Other signs: inappropriate attention seeking behaviors, trying to twist the situation on you when confronted about things, not respecting your boundaries, is super friendly with new people but in a disingenuous 'I wanna be liked the most' way."
"Then constant gaslighting, getting mad at you for not going by the exact same moral playbook as them, when in group settings they get really uncomfortable and try to change the subject or put you down extra if attention is on you, acting they like can take constructive feedback but actually taking it out on you in small ways throughout the rest of the day."
-MattTheRat-
And Now?
Oh No Anger GIF by KingfisherWorldGiphy"You see you got a private message from them and your gut reaction is to start getting nervous or anxious."
"'What is it this time...'"
FernandeWorm
There is a very informative list.
Guess what?
Nick Offerman Popcorn GIF by NBCGiphy"Friends who gossip excessively. If they're talking about other people, chances are they're talking about you."
Jalaphi23
"And people that send you screenshots of private messages with other people. Guess what? Your private messages are being sent around too."
Rikosae
Caring
"Being dismissive of all your interests and achievements. Meanwhile everything they do, no matter how mundane, is amazing."
TijuanaMccrory
"And then you bring this issue up and they give bs reasons like 'it’s hard for me to care about something I don’t know about” or even further “you’re being sensitive/erratic/emotional' and you just sit there thinking 'I’m sure glad I still attentively listened to all those times you bored me with your financial spreadsheets you made to decide what car you would buy...'"
TGDivide
Not Real
"They only talk to you when all of their other friends are gone."
"My 'best friend' in high school did this with boys. If she was dating someone I was invisible. I can only think of one guy she dated where this didn’t happen."
pizzapeople31
"Same. I 'broke up' with her after 10 years of being best friends cause I couldn’t handle the emotional turmoil of the intense loneliness of hanging out with someone almost every day to nothing at all for a few months till she was single again. Every time I would get right again she would become single and I would fall back into it so I just put a hard stop to it. It’s best that we aren’t friends than settling for being her placeholder."
bendydendi
2 Way Street
"Always asking for favors but never there when you need them to return one. It's the fact that they act like you are the best of friends when they're around you because they want something, then Immediately blow you off once you've helped. Had a few so called friends like this. They weren't around for long."
"Yeah a friendship is a two-way street and ones that only go one way are not healthy."
-eDgAR-
100%
Fuck You Season 4 GIF by FriendsGiphy"Friends that don’t let you have any other friends and require 100% of your time when they can’t give you the same."
sexyandnotyours
All of these signs are IMPERATIVE! Trust!
What things would you add to this list? Let us know in the comments below.
Cautious People Admit The Things That Make Them Immediately Lose Trust
Cautious People Admit The Things That Make Them Immediately Lose Trust
[rebelmouse-image 18346893 is_animated_gif=Trust issues define a generation.
Millenials have incredible trust issues. Study after study has shown that our generation trusts nothing that is thrown at them. Part of the reasoning for that may be because we so easily pick up cues from other people. So Redditor pmmecoolpianopics, looking more into our trust issues, asked the internet:
Here are some of the most trustworthy answers.
Spousal Denial
[rebelmouse-image 18346894 is_animated_gif=Badmouth their spouses. Anybody who has so little respect for their own life partners makes me wonder if can they respect anybody or anything.
The Scorpio Queen
[rebelmouse-image 18346895 is_animated_gif=Use their astrology sign as an excuse for s***** behavior or poor personality traits. "I'm just a Scorpio. Don't argue with me when I think I'm right." No, Jenny, you're just a b-tch. Work on it.
Beggars Being Choosers
[rebelmouse-image 18346896 is_animated_gif=People that don't pay back money they owe you. Hey sometimes they forget a few $ and that's understandable but if it happens more than twice regardless of the amount, I suddenly "have no cash on me". Ever.
Cell Phones A Plenty
[rebelmouse-image 18346897 is_animated_gif=Have more than 2 phones on them. 0 phones is ok, not everyone needs a cellphone. 1 is regular, a lot of people have a phone. 2 ok so you got a personal phone and a work phone. No problem. 3, they are up to something. Wether it be drugs or cheating.
Awesome
[rebelmouse-image 18346898 is_animated_gif=Talk way too much about how awesome they are
Use Your Pronouns
[rebelmouse-image 18346899 is_animated_gif=I don't trust people who insist on using my name in every sentence, I get the feeling they want to manipulate me or sell me something. It's the kind of shit I bet they learn in Salesman 101 to get suckers to trust them
Showing Off
[rebelmouse-image 18346900 is_animated_gif=those people who only bother you to get information out of you, or only pop up in your life when it is convenient for them. also, drug addicts who are too far gone because they are extremely manipulative and will say anything to get you on their side but all they want to do is drag you down with them because drugs matter the most to them.
Flakes
[rebelmouse-image 18346901 is_animated_gif=People who never commit to plans, but make sure they're holding that door open still. They're almost always opportunists who are just waiting for something better to come along. But just in case my plans are better they don't want to say no. They're almost always going to stand you up, or cancel last minute at some point.
So It's YOUR Fault!
[rebelmouse-image 18346902 is_animated_gif=ALWAYS have a reason why something wasn't their fault.
Bad Cop
[rebelmouse-image 18346903 is_animated_gif=get defensive when questioned.
Absolutely
[rebelmouse-image 18346904 is_animated_gif=I don't trust people who see the world in absolutes.
Framed
[rebelmouse-image 18346905 is_animated_gif=People with razor wire thin chin strap facial hair. Just why?
Carmen San Diego
[rebelmouse-image 18346906 is_animated_gif=Wear a long trenchcoat with the collar up & big sunglasses.
As God Is My Witness
[rebelmouse-image 18346907 is_animated_gif=people who take great pains to tell you how honest they are
Global Responsibility
[rebelmouse-image 18346908 is_animated_gif=Make a mess for the janitor to clean up because "I'm giving them a job"
Shhhhhh....
[rebelmouse-image 18346909 is_animated_gif=People who say, "Don't tell anyone but..." or, "I'm not supposed to say this to anyone but..." or some version of not being able to keep to themselves what was disclosed to them in confidence. It immediately tells me nothing I tell them is safe.
On The Way Down
[rebelmouse-image 18346910 is_animated_gif=Smile too much and call me darling, experience has showed me that people are always treating me as a child when they do that, and I can expect the same respect they give to a child
Which is "I will respect you untill you dare to argue back"
Clutter
[rebelmouse-image 18346911 is_animated_gif=i don't trust people who just throw their s*** on the floor when they're done with it like what the f-ck tim just put it in a fucking bin like 10 feet away or fucking put it your nasty cargo shorts pockets like what the frickin heck dude
Storytime
[rebelmouse-image 18346912 is_animated_gif=I don't trust people who have a story for everything. They're usually always lying to get you to like them.
My Name Is Elder Price
[rebelmouse-image 18346913 is_animated_gif=Who wear short sleeved shirts and a tie.
Alas
[rebelmouse-image 18346914 is_animated_gif=I don't trust people who wear those eyeglasses with the fake nose and moustache. They're usually very sketchy but, alas, not always.
Alpaca Your Bags
[rebelmouse-image 18346915 is_animated_gif=People who chew with their mouth open. Not only is it bad manners but it's downright disrespectful to the ears. I immediately think they're a sh-t human being or an alpaca and I'll be damned if I ever trust an alpaca again.