Reddit user Pixiedustpotatoe asked:
Were you bullied at school? Where are your bullies now and what did they make of their lives?
and it's pretty much like a VH1 Where Are They Now? special for all the people in your life who really, really sucked.
If you experience bullying then you sort of hope to see your bullies face some sort of karmic consequences, but based on these responses it may not happen.
When it does though, ooooohhhh when it does...
She Is Not Her Father
He became an auto mechanic, was married and had 2 kids. He died around 35 years old and I ended up teaching his daughter in middle school. She was very smart which was weird since he was not at all. I went out of my way to be sure I was kind to her and to be sure there was no negative feelings towards her. She is not her father and had nothing to do with how he treated me.
- 1toy4me
They Succeed Just Fine
Yes, and well, they all have normal lives as far as I know. They finished school, got normal jobs, and carried on as if nothing had happened.
I've found out that the thing they tell you about bullies not succeeding in life is just a lie. In all honesty, they have had more successful lives than myself, so it has flipped the other way around. Bullying someone doesn't leave a major impact on your life, while getting bullied can easily lead to social and mental problems.
Plot Twist!
GiphyI was. I became friends with my high school bully as an adult after we connected on Facebook (she had been a Mean Girl, popular, was a model, while I was a weird, bookish art nerd). She confessed in our 30s a few years into the friendship she had feelings for me, it was wild (I never anticipated it, had always thought she was straight.)
She got embarrassed and ghosted after I asked for time to process what she'd told me (I was interested, just blown away.)
I have no idea what she's doing now. I think she's a stay at home mom. I dunno, I hope she's happy. She turned out not to be a bad person, just troubled.
Some Things Never Change
My bully would pull my pants down without fail every day from grade 3 to grade 5. It could be while I was eating lunch, or washing my hands, or walking by - just at any point of the day really. She would even pull my underwear down with my pants occasionally. I would get so embarrassed and cry in the bathrooms.
Fast forward to now, she came up on Facebook as a friend suggestion (stalked a little, she's now married with a baby girl), some of my colleagues being mutual friends. I asked one of my colleagues about how they knew the bully and my colleague said the bully was working here and got fired a month before I started working.
Apparently she was purposely causing dramas between departments. I asked my colleague what she was like and my colleague (who didn't know she was a bully) said she was always very rude, unapproachable and difficult to work with. Sounds like some things never change!
I'm A Better Person
He's got a nice, cushy job, a wife, four kids, and owns his house. And I have PTSD and am currently unemployed in part because of that diagnosis.
But I'm a better person than he is, because I can say without reservation that I've never abused anyone in all the ways he abused me.
I still don't forgive him. I want to but I can't do that yet.
Tenure
Don't know, don't care, I'm a tenured professor now with plenty of time for my hobbies so f*ck them wherever they are.
- nealius
Satisfying
GiphyOne boy at school spent years calling me fat and ugly. A couple of years ago he persistently hit on me in a club to the point that a male friend had to threaten him to leave me alone. Satisfying doesn't cover it.
- dgic
The Sheer Disregard
Bullied, called homophobic slurs because I wanted to stay in and sketch/ draw cartoons and not play sports. Kicked and punched a couple of times too.
Met both of them years after we went to school together. One had gone to jail for a year. Both acted like they never did anything or remember what they did. I think that's the part that hurt the most, just the sheer disregard.
Thanks Karma!
Yes, and things actually turned out quite well for me. I was a really nerdy, very unattractive kid. Kids picked on me a lot. All these years later, I turned out to be quite beautiful and am a lawyer. The bullies? Most dropped out of college. The worst of them used to be a very cute kid but turned into a morbidly obese adult who lives at home. Karma did me good.
Once A Year
One of my bullies was/is a friend of my brothers. My brother moved 1000 miles away from me, but the bully friend still lives in my same area. My brother comes to visit 2x a year, and during the summer visit, I throw a large party, to which my brother always invites this person.
I was teased and taunted unmercifully by this guy all through high school about my weight, looks, lack of boyfriend (or type of bf when I had one) you name it. My husband is perturbed that my brother is even friends with this guy still. But he and us only see him once a year for about three hours. We will survive, I am 48 now, I'm an adult, I'm over it an not afraid of him.
I am, however, pleased (in a petty revenge kind of way) to report he has had not one but TWO failed marriages, lost a nice job his sister got him at her company because he came to work drunk, got kicked out of college for who knows what (alleged illegal activity, from what my brother says), and I'm sure his life sucks in other ways.
Feel No Pity
I was bullied to the point where I considered suicide, luckily a few things happened in my life which helped me to change my mind and I'm doing really well right now (I'm currently working toward my dream career!) I still have anxiety and depression but it's not a bad as it used to be.
I find it funny how all the people who bullied me and almost destroyed me, are now destroying their own lives with drugs and alcohol. I don't feel any pity for them, after over 10 years of torment, both mental and physical (of course the school system did absolutely nothing to help me). They got what they deserved.
Motivation
Two mean girls at my high school. One got an abortion and graduated a low tier law school, the other went to some city college for an arts degree and is now doing probably some minimum wage job.
I'd say just keep working hard, and when you get unmotivated think about how good it'd feel to laugh at those people on your way up >:)
Sure as hell got me going.
Relevant Backstory
There were two main bullies, the best I can tell one turned into a typical working class chav and he spends the majority of his time doing petty criminal stuff - his brother, also a bully of mine, is serving hard time for an armed robbery. I expected nothing less. The other, I've no idea what happened to him but mutual acquaintances tell me he is now a drug addict and homeless so I'm in the odd position of feeling sorry for someone who caused me a lot of misery.
On a more positive note, another kid who bullied me in High School ended up becoming one of my friends many years later. He was abused at home as a kid and that was the reason he acted out in school. Now he's happily married and living a great life.
- zerbey
A Lesson Learned
I was bullied and I did some bullying of my own, I am not proud of that, but it did happen and I have since reached out to them to tell them I am sorry and that I had no right to do what I did and asked them to forgive me. They all (thankfully) forgave me and thanked me for contacting them.
I know that 'bullying' by today's standards is vastly more harmful than what I did in the late 80's/early 90's, with everyone seeing it online with cyber-bullying, but I still feel pretty bad about what I said to some people.
Nightmares
GiphyI had a horrible bully in middle school. I was an athletic (judo) girl, not even chubby, but she shamed me into anorexia and eventual hospitalization. Fast forward 5 years, she jumped from an 8 story building and died two days later. Had extremely mixed feelings about it, even went to her funeral. I'd been wishing death on that girl for half a decade. Still have nightmares of me pushing her.
- bellezyk
Better
Ayy, got bullied by someone when younger. Turns out he stole my first girlfriend. We were together for 3 and a half years. It's been like 6 years now and they are still together.
So briefly, my bully stole my girlfriend and turns out to be a better boyfriend than me. Fml.
- morybon