Your bedroom is a reflection of who you are. It's the heart of your dwelling, with an aesthetic that is personal and at which you are at your most vulnerable, physically, and emotionally.
So when it's finally time to share the space with a romantic partner, either one of these things is bound to happen.
You'll most likely have an erotic experience charged by mutual passion, or the person you lured into your sexy lair will take one look at your collection of vintage dolls and politely nope out of there.
Curious to hear about bedroom aesthetics and their influence on people, Redditor kyle21irvin asked:
"What is a bedroom decoration that makes somebody unattractive?"
These are decorations for some, living nightmares for others.
"piss bottles in the corner of their room."
"speaking from experience."
"Eww- my bf when I was a teen (now ex bf) used to do this because his room was in the basement and he was too lazy to go upstairs. Once cause you’re sleeping? Ok but get rid of it the next day. No- he started using regular cups from the kitchen and just leaving them in his room. It stunk and molded."
"I said something about it and he flipped out on me and said I embarrassed him (it was just us in the room). He progressively got worse, super narcissistic, gaslighting and emotionally abusive."
"So many signs I should have listened to but he already had me gaslighted. Horrible horrible time in my life."
We Got Company
"Dolls. Lots of dolls. Dolls that just stare at you. Dolls that judge your soul. Dolls that become possessed."
Where The Bodies Go
"A blue 55 gallon barrel in the corner."
What occupies the walls of a bedroom says a lot about a narcissist...or a horn dog.
"Knew a guy that had a framed professional photo of himself, shirtless, over the top of his bed. 🙄"
"If you’re a guy and you have too many posters of bikini-clad women on your walls, that’s a huge turn-off."
"pictures of their ex."
These odd scenarios raised eyebrows.
Leave A Mark
"White butcher paper covering the entire backside of bedroom door. A black sharpie dangling on an attached string. Please don’t forget to sign as you exit ladies."
A Wrong Impression
"The first night I brought my partner back to my apartment, I was telling him some stories about my dachsund (who lived at my mom's house). He saw a dachsund plushie sitting on the TV and thought that was what I was talking about."
"Later, when he met my dog, he said 'oh, what a relief! I thought you were crazy!'"
A Grip On Love
"Handlebars on the headboard."
"Fluorescent lights. It makes everyone unattractive."
The Empire Strikes Back
"I once hooked up with a girl who, it turned out, kept a lifesize Star Wars stormtrooper mannequin in her bedroom."
"I have never been harder before or since."
"Using old liquor bottles as decoration. Not special ones, but the kind that just show off that they drink excessively."
"Ugh yes my ex-boyfriend's friend collected monster energy cans and thought it was the epitome of aesthetic interior design to display them on a shelf."
Is that art?
"A former roommate had several paintings of crying women in his room. One very large and amateurish... Brought a lot of women home though 🤷🏼♂️"
Nothing Is Just As Bad
"How about lack of decoration? Because a matress on the floor is not attractive."
We all have our unique tastes that inspire the look of our bedrooms, and I don't judge anyone's personal aesthetic within reason.
But huge turn-offs for me are bad hygiene and untidiness.
As an example of the latter, I would say rolling over onto a plate of dried SpaghettiOs just as things are getting heated is not something I would say is an element of a romantic evening.
Yeah, it was over before the pants even came off.
"I have to respond to this text," said I, as excused myself when my phone wasn't even in the same room.
Leave your dirty dishes in the sink, or wash them while you're there, people.
Finding the right pajamas can be a fairly stressful ordeal.
Which is perhaps why some people choose to forgo pajamas all together, and sleep in the nude.
No doubt saving people hundreds of dollars on what they might otherwise have spent on a pair of pajamas.
But in addition to being economical, people no doubt have countless reasons for their natural choice of sleepwear.
Or lack thereof.
Redditor -TheMidpoint- was curious to hear why people opted to sleep in the buff, leading them to ask:
"People who sleep naked, why?"
Because I can!
"Zero restrictions while sleeping means better sleep."
"I have learned to hang a robe by the bedroom door..."- IssaScott
"I sleep better when my body is a bit cool."
"I hate having to wear clothes by day, so by night its a relief!"- Draculamb
'I have to wear clothes all day, f*ck having to wearing them in bed."- Purple-Homework764Lets Go Undress GIF by PaxerosGiphy
Built in security system
"Wouldn't you be scared if you were a robber and saw a naked man running at you with a frying pan?"- makz_ammo
Read into it as you will...
"Same reason I shower naked, so I don't get my clothes wet."- dmack080288
This could have two meanings...
'It's f*ckin hot."- KulladarFan Reaction GIF by MOODMANGiphy
Not just at bedtime...
"It stops people from sitting next to me on the train."- bujler
"When else does my genitals gets to see sunlight."- sex_chef
To get a head start on the day.
"In the morning I don’t feel like taking off clothes to get into the shower so i just sleep naked."- Zoie10135Relaxing Homer Simpson GIFGiphy
It just feels so good...
"because it's way more comfortable and I won't feel every single crease in the clothing and it won't bunch up."- everyonesBF
The most important factor when it comes to sleepwear is comfort.
Which, for many people means ditching sleeping attire all together.
And let's face it, there are few better feelings than that of the sheets against your skin.
Well, maybe one or two things, which also involve a lack of clothing...
What does this insomniac do at night?
Work. The answer is work. It always has been.
As a kid, I'd write endlessly in notebooks when I couldn't sleep. Now that I'm an adult you can absolutely find me online at 4 AM rambling about some madness like trans Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or that one time my neighbor bare-hand picked up a piece of dog poop and put it in her pocket.
Yes, I live in Florida.
For me, insomnia is a place of creation. But what is it for others?
For that, we turn to Reddit. Because humans stay nosy about what everybody else is doing.
Reddit user Acid_In_My_Eyes asked:
"People who can't sleep, what do you do all night?"
Yeah ... turns out, it's certainly not a space of creation for everyone. Unless the thing you're creating is anxiety.
Over and Over
"Toss and turn. Overthink. Replay conversations on my mind."
"Yeah man... anxiety takes it toll on sleep. The more stressful the day, the worse the sleep."
"100%!!!! And how I could have acted differently or what else could’ve happened."
"Be increasingly pissed off about not being able to sleep."
"It's the most vicious cycle ever."
"Can't sleep, pissed off that you can't sleep, now it's even harder to get to sleep. Now you are stressing out because it's getting closer to the next day, adds to the fact you cant sleep."
"Calculate how many hours of sleep I could at least still have if I was able to fall asleep at that moment."
"It’s literally the worst because I end up priming myself for a day where I believe I’ll perform suboptimally; thereby ensuring I perform suboptimally."
"It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy."
"Being tired and having a sh*t day at work because you laid awake all night thinking about how you were going to be tired and have a sh*t day at work is the worst."
Not No Regrets
" 'Dream’ random scenarios in my head where I either could have done better or changed things, or I’m dreaming of scenarios I want to happen, either because they might or just because I want it in the future"
"So its not 'no regrets' it's 'some regrets?' "
"Every single day. They can be as small as ‘I wish I had just given x person x compliment’ to ‘I never should have told x person about x secret’ etc"
"I have found success in just accepting that I cant sleep, OK I GUESS IM NOT GONNA SLEEP RIGHT NOW...and then getting in to a comfy position."
"EYES WIDE OPEN, NOT TRYING to sleep. Just lay there and let my mind wander."
"I build what I call, happy places."
"What kind of life do I WISH I had? What kind of world do I wish this was?"
"I build the whole world, I usually have powers but no one knows."
"I'm rich. I'm single. The world is safe enough to leave your front door unlocked and no one goes in to your house."
"I just build and build and build the most kickass scenarios, and eventually I'll wake up and be like 'OH I FELL ASLEEP!' and after that I usually keep sleeping."
Bed Time Stories
"I am really bad at falling asleep. Unless really tired and/or using alcohol."
"Since that's not an everyday solution I listen to an audiobook, in my case the Harry Potter series."
"I know the books so well that my brain, while focusing on the story, grows numb an I fall asleep."
"The audiobook, unless the device is shaken, will turn off after 30 minutes. I mostly fall asleep within the hour now and I have something fun to listen to."
"Haven't tried it using a story I don't know, but that will probably keep me awake."
"I do this with Forensic Files."
"It’s crazy, but I’ve seen all 20 thousand of them and the familiarity and voice puts me in a calm trance."
"It takes what it takes lol"
Crash When You Crash
"Read, browse reddit, music, get some work done, daydream/think whatever u wanna call it."
"I don't adhere to a schedule, I just crash when I crash, get up when I get up."
"It's healthy trust me."
"Do u work or go to school right now?"
"School, and online. All it complicates is the occasional obligation. May not align for everyone, but it's what works for me and if it works for you it could be all cool."
Relish The Rare
"Turn off blue light on all devices an hour before sleep."
"Use a white noise app or something similar so your mind blocks out and focuses on only 1 sound."
"Reading or listening to podcasts."
"Turn a lot."
"Most importantly for me is to get comfortable and relish in that rare comfort."
"The times I'm not worried about my lack of sleep, the better sleep I get. I normally remember that being comfy and switched off from the world (even if it doesn't work) is much more preferable to being uncomfy, looking at a screen and working for 7 hours straight."
"If nothing else, Masturbate."
"I’m going through chemo treatments right now and on Tuesday nights through Thursday, into Friday, I can’t sleep."
"I will get up, go to the living room, pour a cup of coffee and read."
"I’ve finished a few books since January and I’m running out. I’m taking in the peace and quiet and transporting myself to a different world for a few hours."
"Then, I’ll take a nap for a bit. Rinse and repeat every other week."
"I remember a few weeks back, I was quite nervous about my girlfriend's wellbeing as she was super stressed about things."
"That made me super stressed about things to the point I couldn't sleep."
"I ended up trying to assemble basic sentences in Japanese for a few hours to take my mind off things."
That Scrubbing Sound
"I really don’t know if this will help anyone, but I watch reconstruction videos of old vintage items and welding of items."
"Such as cleaning a old and broken PS1 and forging weapons from video games, hearing the sounds and the scrubbing at a low sound does help me sleep"
There you go, fellow insomniacs.
Now you've got a project list for the next time sleep decides it's not your friend.
Want to know more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Sex is fun. That is rule #1... sex should be fun.
And it should be safe and responsible and yada yada yah.
Sex should be all of those things. And it should be something we can speak openly about.
Let's not sit around waiting for Madonna to sing about it some more, let's already implement the lessons she's espoused.
There are rules and conversations to be had, and no class in school, or book is going to be able to tell you everything.
So let's chat...
Redditorxk543xwanted to talk about sex baby.
"What are some unspoken rules of sex?"
Try to stay as sober as possible. Not remembering due to alcohol or whatever your poison is, just feels empty.
"Cut/sand down any fingernails you plan to put inside another person."
pengd0tSeth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy
"To all the cowgirls out there, the penis is breakable, be a bit gentle."
"That audible pop will never leave your mind. Even after Alzheimer's riddles your brain."
"Yeah, if you're a cowgirl, grinding your hips back and forth is the motion, not bouncing up and down. If you want a thrusting motion when you're on top, lay down on top of him and let him do the work."
Bad Move Bro...
"Never tell a woman, 'oh but I didn't have an issue with this with my exes."'This was when I tried to tell him, again, but well after sex that he was just rubbing my clit wrong. He was practically jabbing it with his thumb like it was an elevator button. Every woman is different!"
"I had a guy ask my if I was enjoying myself because I wasn't moaning in that moment and 'most people are moaning more by now.' We never had sex again."
"Give them a hug and kiss afterwards. It helps."
"Depends. Could be confusing to someone just expecting casual sex and getting that... might seem like a pity hug or something. The phrasing reminds me of something Abby would encounter on Broad City to be honest."
"But yeah ~ do that when dating someone, definitely. Hug, kiss, cuddle as default. Hugging and a kiss after finishing is not a rule for sex, its a rule for 'intimate or semi-intimate partner' sex. Sex for the first time with someone and you're 'meh' about seeing them again, DO NOT hug/kiss. That is just leading the other person to believe that there is more to the encounter than what you're feeling."
Stay the Course...
"Please do not go faster/harder if you can tell I am about to finish. Do exactly what you were doing that got me there."
"Sincerely, my clitoris."
tinybirdblueRelaxed Basketball Wives GIF by VH1Giphy
Be confident. And be truthful. If they're doing it wrong... say it. Help the next person out.
"Don't start talking about your ex or your kids at any point in proceedings."
cruiserman_80be quiet bbc three GIF by BBCGiphy
I'm Only Me
"Don't blame you. Being compared to other partners is rude and weird, especially in the moment. Imo, it's healthier and more enjoyable to approach sex as a fun, exploratory connection, rather than a 'if I do X, they do Y! If they do this, I get that!' So many sexual scripts are inaccurate, and they reduce the uniqueness of connecting with an individual."
"If you’re enjoying something, just enjoy it, and don’t ask them where they learned to do it."
"My wife and I are poly. One time I was going down on someone who was pretty new to the scene and I guess they were impressed because they asked 'did [wife] teach you that?' I didn't really have an answer besides '..no?' and they just sort of seemed generally uncomfortable until we stopped a couple minutes later. They obviously ended up realizing that non-monogamy wasn't really for them and we stayed platonic friends. <3"
"Possibly TMI but I love pretty much all sex, seeing it, hearing about it, etc. but I can get why people don't want to think about partners with other people. To this day that feels like such a weird fucking question for someone in the latter category to ask during sex."
And you are?
"Don’t get their name wrong."
“'Freedom of speech does not mean freedom from consequences. You’re well within your rights to shout out another person’s name while making love to your partner… but if you don’t think there won’t be at LEAST a discussion…' - Russell Howard"
"Hygiene... that is all."
"Wash your EVERYTHING!!!"
Don't be Awkward
"Don’t ask a woman to brush her teeth after she’s given you oral sex before you’ll kiss her. She will cry. And also, she’s just had YOUR PENIS in her mouth. To be fair, 25-year-old me didn’t know he was going to lose his virginity that night, but still. Learned that one real quick. Was real awkward."
Warm Up Essential!
"Pre heat the oven don’t just shove it in."
"Always salt your pasta while boiling it."
"Never fart if a girl is giving you oral sex."
"This happened to me in college. Right when I got off. She jerked her head up from the shock wave, stench and ended up with a mess. Ol' Smelly Musket."
"This happened once and I was so embarrassed. My gf finished like a champ but she still makes fun of me."
"All stuffed animals OFF the bed..They don't need to see this. (Context, I am 20f and sleep with a cuddly toy)."
Oobleoobletsacademy awards stuffed animal GIF by E!Giphy
"Even when you are clean you’ll still have a natural body odor of some kind. Don’t talk about it."
"There are people out there with 'weird' odor issues, which probably should be dealt with, but yeah usually it's more like a unique smell, rather than a pleasant or unpleasant smell, and if you get negative thoughts just by smelling them, you're probably just not happy with that person."
"If you want to do something kinky that you've never done with that person, or never explicitly talked about, START SLOW! We hear the choked-out-of-nowhere horror stories surprisingly often in comments, it's always people going 0 to 100 and scaring the crap out of their partner."
"For that example, you start with like a playful, gentle grab of the neck, see how your partner responds or ask if you're not sure. Then you kinda work up in stages until you reach the limit of what's comfortable, or ideally what feels best. You know, instead of helping someone live their nightmares. I think people would be more willing to explore if these crappy experiences weren't so common."
"This is why."
"The partner that doesn't get an orgasm out of it is sooner or later going to be trying to rush through sex as quickly as possible. They won't want foreplay and they'll be happy for you to come quick."
"Why doesn't my partner want sex?"
"This is why."
"Not a single rule should go unspoken, with the exception of mutual respect. Ask questions and make clear boundaries before, during, and after. want to try something? ask. Not comfortable with something? Tell them."
Western_Cook8422speak jimmy fallon GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy FallonGiphy
"The unspoken rule of sex should be to SPEAK. Don’t get me wrong, a good mindless, in-the-moment, tuned to each other’s bodies session is great, but if you’re having sex with someone you care about, take the time to discuss goals, wants, needs, and anything else ahead of time. 'Here’s what I want' should be spoken by each party, so you have a clear goal, and know what to do to reach it."
"Maybe your goal is to finish and go to bed. Maybe it’s to try something new. Maybe you just want to be given oral for hours or worshipped. Maybe you want to be berated and disciplined. It opens up a world of opportunity you otherwise wouldn’t ever explore because you never discussed it."
I hope you all wrote this down, or bookmarked. Especially that last one. Sadly it's too often overlooked.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Owning your own home is great!
You get the freedom to do whatever you want with your property—unless you're stuck under the tyrannical thumb of a Homeowners' Association—and no sharing walls with neighbors to keep you up at night.
Unfortunately, it also means that you have to deal with all of the problems that come up all by yourself too.
Reddit user winterwolf2010 asked:
"What is one thing about your house that is mildly infuriating?"
Hope You Like Damp
"We are the lowest house in a hilly neighborhood so guess whose yard floods?"
"What's up fellow swamp homie. How many times have you gotten your lawn mower stuck (twice) and have you gotten your truck stuck trying to pull your lawnmower out (once)."
"They wouldn't need to worry about water in the desert if they'd just pipe it straight out of our yards eh?"
Where's The Line?
"In a tightly-packed neighborhood, the property lines for my yard and my neighbors' yards aren't right down the middle between the houses; they're closer to my house than they are to the neighbors' houses."
"I used to find it infuriating when my neighbors would mow part of my lawn while mowing theirs. Then I learned where my property lines actually are. Now I'm just furious at my lawn."
Which Switch Is Which?
"No matter which switch I flip to turn on the kitchen light, it's the wrong one. It seems no matter which one I flip, I get get the dining room light or the laundry room light instead of the kitchen on the first try."
Do-si-do Your Partner
"My entry-way/foyer/whatever that area is called, is too goddamned small. There is enough room for one person to come in, close the door behind them, and take off their shoes and coat."
"Add one other person and it becomes a ballet. Add 2 people or a child and it's Twister but all the colors all the time."
"I have two switches that do nothing. I've plugged lamps into all the nearby outlets then toggled the switches, all the overhead lights are accounted for."
"Both phantom switches are on a plate with three switches. I assume the previous home owner had them running to something but when things got rewired he just didn't bother removing the switch, replacing the plate patching the hole."
"Instead there's just some capped off wiring somewhere in my walls."
"Thing is, I'm almost certainly not going to fix this minor but annoying issue either so it will be up to the next homeowner to fix it. An endless cycle of laziness and incompetence."
Just A Bit Crooked
"Absolutely nothing is squared correctly. The window's off by more than 3 degrees on both sides. Door frame...the same..."
Just A Bad Layout
"My kitchen sink is positioned on an inside corner with a cabinet below at a 45 degree angle to the dishwasher to the left. Whenever I open the dish washer, I can't open the cabinet under the sink to get the dishwasher soap."
"I've lived here for 17 years, and every damned day I open the dishwasher, try to open the cabinet and hit the dishwasher door with it. Have to close the dishwasher door, open the cabinet, get the soap, close the cabinet door, open the dishwasher door, pour the soap, close the dishwasher door, open the cabinet door and put away the soap."
"When I redo the kitchen I'm relocating some things even if it means losing some counter real estate."
Well, That's Just...Unfortunate...
"The only floor in the entire house that creaks? Yup, master bedroom right under the bed......"
It's Haunting Me
"There's this tiny TINY black dot in my bedroom ceiling that I can't unsee."
"It's fine. It can see you."
"We have a tiny spot in our bathroom that wasn't painted when they built our house. I feel your pain…"
That's A House Fire Waiting To Happen
"I have a 14' x 16' room on the back with half a dozen can lights, a ceiling fan with light, and about 10 sets of outlets."
"The entire f*cking room is on a single 15A breaker."
Sometimes it's the littlest things that can really drive you crazy over time.
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.