Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor SafetySnorkel asked:
"What are some signs you should NOT become a parent?"
These are the wrong reasons for people to decided to have kids.
Feeling The Pressure
"If you're doing it just because everyone else is."
– EllsyP0
"On top of that, if your religion really pushes for it, it's okay to say no thanks. Yes, children will bring great joy and blessings into your life, but uh, I like having free time. And if I think I'll be a bad parent, then why chance it?"
– stealth57
The Wrong Backup Plan
"if you do it in the hopes of 'saving' or 'advancing' your relationship, or if you wish to 'compensate' for perceived lack of personal achievements."
– Comprehensive_Day511
It's Teamwork
"Want to exacerbate the bad things in your relationship? Put a baby in the middle of it. If you weren't getting along before, you sure as sh*t aren't going to get a long better on half as much sleep and quadruple the stress."
– SeeYouOn16
Mental and emotional well-being were mentioned as a prerequisite to parenting.
First Things First
"If you can't look after yourself first."
– whetstonereek
"This is the most important one. You will have a hard time caring for someone else if you are struggeling with life yourself."
– MyNameIsMikeAswell
No Regrets
"In my 50s and life has been a roller-coaster. One thing which can cheer me up a bit when I’m at the lows is remembering: At leadt I don’t have any kids. They would be messed up and angry and it’s likely I’d be facing charges for neglect."
– LanceFree
If your fit the following descriptions, you're definitely not a parent-person.
The Wrong Approach To Raising Kids
"You view your child as a mould in which you can shape, alter, and control, pinning all of your failed aspirations and ambitions on them and forcing them to be something they are not."
"Rather than acknowledging your role as a guide, motivator, and a pillar of support to help them discover and forge their own identity and loving them even more because of it."
– SublimeVibe
Mind Is Made Up
"Not wanting kids."
– W-S_Wannabe
"I’ll take it further:"
"If you aren’t 100% sure that you want kids, and aren’t willing to sacrifice most of your life to do so, even if they end up being special needs or difficult, then you shouldn’t have them."
– justwalkingalonghere
Thinking About A Kid's Perspective
"I tell people this all the time. You need to really want to have kids. It’s hard to be a good parent even if you want them, if you don’t want them it’s impossible. It’s not fair to the children to bring them into this world without parents that are motivated to parent them."
– Salt_peanuts
This can breed resentment once a child becomes an adult.
A Caution
"If you’re thinking of having kids so they can be your retirement plan then please. Don’t."
– Pizzawithchickensoup
"Dealing with this right now with my in-laws. Damn glad husband has a spine though, but it's sad to hear the repeating arguments over and over again."
– kindadeadly
Discussing The Future
"Point blank told my dad to pick out his own nursing home and caregiving services when he retired so we would have a plan when he starts eventually declining. 'We are your daughters, not your caretakers.'"
– acc6494
The best barometer I've had indicating that I'm not capable of being a good parent is my gut reaction to kid tantrums in public.
I often see parents being paralyzed when a child is screaming at the top of their tiny lungs and are too afraid to deescalate the distressing situation for fear of being judged by others.
If you spank them, that's abuse. If you yell at them, you're an unfit parent. If you ignore the circumstances hoping the child would calm down on its own, you don't have a backbone and are regarded as a coward.
I've heard all three judgments mumbled by others who are watching. And I would definitely commit one of my reactions to a wailing kid in a grocery store with all eyes on me.
The fact that I'm too concerned about my disciplinary response, or lack thereof, and what people will think of me instead is a good indication that I still make it all about me.
Yeah, I'm not parenting material, and I'm not ashamed to admit it.
Redditor Birchtree16 was eager to hear the names that made people's jaws hit the floor, leading them to ask:
"What baby name immediately makes you lose all respect for the parents and why?"
Not Nearly Enough Space...
"Any of Nick Cannon's kids' names."
"They are all so over the top bad."
"Moroccan, Monroe, Golden Sagon, Rise Messiah, Powerful Queen, Zion Mixolydian, Zillion Heir, Beautiful Zeppelin, Legendary Love, Onyx Ice Cole and Zen."
"Why?"- cinnamongreen
Why Even Bother?
"Joaux (Joe) is a personal favorite."- Themissrebecca103
This Just seems reckless
"Any name as alcohol. Chardonnay, Tequila, etc."
"Saw those a lot as a teacher."
"Had a male student named Crash Danger."
'Not kidding."- Tanyaschmidt
Happy New Year GIF by HBOGiphyHow Pretentious Can You Get?
"I know someone who named their kid Chozyn."
"The kid wasn’t adopted either."- Stabyouup666
They Will Find Out Eventually
"I used to be on tumblr back in the day of Supernaturals glory, and someone named their poor child 'Destiel'."
"I get it, you like the ship."
"But you have an actual child that is TOTALLY gonna be pissed you named your kid after a fictional relationship on a show about demons and other supernatural things."
"The lack of respect or forethought like?"- Niburu-Illyria
Naming Your Child After You Has Its Risks...
"Youandi."
"It stands for you and i."
"Horrible."- NathalieDV90
Confused Always Sunny GIF by It's Always Sunny in PhiladelphiaGiphyThank Goodness For Nicknames
"Mike but short for Micycle."- BurningHuman
X Marks The Spot...
"All the names with X thrown in the middle or even two."
"Jaxxtley."
"Braxxton."
"Braxley."
"I hate them."- WorkRedditUsername69
Definietely No Chance Of A Complex...
"A guy running for some office near me is named Rocky Rhodes."
"How does one look at their tiny newborn and think 'Rocky! '"
"Looks like a Rocky to me.'"
"And you know how much I love ice cream!'"- nahteviro
"My brother once had clients named Jerry and Mary Derryberry."
"We didn’t believe him so he took a picture of whatever account papers."
"Don’t even remember what his job was at the time, who gives a sh*t."
"But the series of events to have a married couple be named Jerry and Mary Derryberry is just so delicious."- Jibber_Fight
Bon Appetit Gourmet GIF by Studios 2016GiphySome Points For Originality?
"Horribly misspelled to seem different."
"The irony is that my boyfriend's name is Krysteffor."- quinnk1n
That's Just Laziness...
"Misspelling of common names to act trendy."- amdpg1976·
'Parents who essentially give their kids the same first name as their last name."
"Robert Roberts, William Williams, etc."
"I know one of each in real life."
"It seems purposefully cruel."- bwilson525
NO.
"Reighfyl, pronounced 'rifle'."- KickNo2069
Or They Were Just Jane The Virgin Fans...
"A girl I know, her name is Baby Sasha."
"She said we can call her baby."
"Her parents were clearly lazy to come up with a proper name."- saltyy_spitoon
It's certainly easy to judge when we hear a name which is, to put it mildly, peculiar.
Though before we rush to judgment, we must consider that unusual as may seem, it could have personal meaning to the family.
Though, anyone who names their child "Reighfyl", regardless of the spelling, definitely deserves to be judged.
