"What are some horrifying things to consider when thinking about aliens?"
We'll Be Their Pets...
"Aliens could do to us what we did to wolves, selectively breeding a once noble species in grotesque ways, transforming us into the equivalent of bulldogs, poodles, dacshunds, etc."- flipester
No Matter How, It'll End Badly...
There is absolutely nothing on planet Earth that the aliens can't find in more abundance elsewhere."
"Precious metals, gasses for fuel, assuming they don't have zero point energy or some sh*t that lets them get power from vacuum, and even water are all available in space and you can get this resources with zero resistance."
"So I don't think they would come here for any resources, unless they want our biosphere."
"Which, for all we know, could be abundant in the galaxy."
"If aliens do show up one day but turn out to be hostile, there is absolutely nothing we can do to stop them."
"If they have been coming here, if you believe in that sort of thing, they have been doing so for a VERY long time."
"They know everything about us, including our weaknesses and how to exploit them."
"Meanwhile, they are a species capable of FTL travel."
"Wiping us out would be as simple for them as flipping on a light switch."
"No jet-to-ship dog fights, no magical weak point to hit, no third-act secret weapon to save us."
"Just one press of that button and everything turns white--and then black."
'So if they do come to Earth, they would need a damn good reason to."
"If our luck is truly awful and they actually want something from us, we'd better pray that it's something that we don't have to fight over because we wouldn't stand a chance."- Armascribe
Commuting Area 51 GIF by Joseph HarmonGiphyNothing To worry About... I Hope...
"It’s possible that they are fat single-cell organisms just loafing around."- Literally_The_Best
It Might Not Be As Bad As We Think... It Will Probably Be Much MUCH Worse...
"For all we know, aliens might not be the 'little green men' that fly around in flying saucers and destroy us with laser beams."
"They could be an interstellar pathogen that shows up one day and silently and effortlessly kills us all without warning."
"Our immune systems would have no idea what hit them."- CaptainWisconsin
Emotional Disconnect
"Our human concepts of morality and empathy are heavily influenced by our mammalian biology."
"Imagine that aliens land, and instead of having nice little family units their species lays clutches of thousands of eggs at a time."
"They don't form strong bonds."
"Life is essentially expendable for them."
"They see us weeping over a dead child and they have literally no frame of reference for understanding why this would be upsetting."
"I'm not saying all aliens will be like this; but some definitely could be."- ToBePacific
alien GIFGiphyDon't Knock It Till You've Tried It?
"What if there really is valuable information to be gained from butt probes?"- HarlanCedeno·
Best To Have An Open Mind...
"The assumption that they come in groups in some flying saucer."
"For all we know they might just 'appear' in hordes of thousands of not millions all across the planet."
"Also, we like to think that aliens will share the same way of thinking as humans, i.e. reasoning, emotions, etc."
"But the only reason we think that is because that's the only thing we are familiar with."
"Aliens might have completely different emotions or thought processes than us but we won't know because we never encountered them before."
"It's like the 4th dimension."
"At this point it's pretty well established what it is but most of us, if not all, have no clue how to visualize or properly explain it."- JingleberryJohnson
alien GIFDidn't Occur To You Either, Did It?
"Extremely unlikely, I know, but if aliens ever come to Earth it likely means they are a space-faring and interstellar capable species with tech at least centuries, if not millennia, ahead of ours."
"In other words: if aliens are even remotely capable of traveling to our planet, we're pretty much outgunned hilariously."- WhereIsOldZealand
The Journey Wouldn't Be Worth It...
"The speed of light is 186,000 miles per second."
"I think that any aliens that are capable of traveling light years to reach us have no interest in our resources."- avatarlevel
They Could Be Trying To Help US?
"The scariest thing to me is thinking that aliens want nothing to do with us."
"I don't get why everyone thinks that aliens would attack us immediately."
"It's one thing if we come into their territory, but if they stumble upon us we're most likely safe."
"Them finding us would mean they are incredibly advanced."
Angry Alien Face GIF by wenjrGiphy"Anything they could get by attacking earth they could get far easier by harvesting it from a different planet in our solar system."
"Unless they feed specifically on brainwaves, it isn't worth the hassle to attack a planet teeming with life they may have some weapons, however primitive, that might be used against you."
"It's far more frightening to believe that aliens have/will one day discover us and won't be interested, They won't want us on their intergalactic counsels, they won't want to give us medicine, they won't want to form any bond."
"If they decide to just leave humanity alone, that means either they have decided we are not worth saving, or that we are too close to destruction to be worth the resources."- BombsNBeer
I'll Believe It When I See It...
"My main thing is that they'll bring a virus or something that'll just wipe us out coz we've never seen anything like it."
"Or we'll be immune coz it's too alien, who knows."
"But until there is actual proof that there are advanced aliens out there, I'll stick to the idea that they are bacterial cells on titan or something."- Libbymiss
We won't even know they came...
"That one day they will just wipe out our planet without us ever knowing why and that it will be so fast we don’t even realize it."
Marine Life Goodbye GIF by pikaoleGiphyThanks to the likes of H.G. Wells, Ridley Scott and others, it's easy to assume the worst about the possible existence of aliens.
Something to consider, which might help us sleep a bit easier at night, is that on some far-off galaxy, there is an extraterrestrial species, just as terrified of us, as we are of them.
Redditor Ill-Jelly2924 asked:
"Aliens come to Earth, we need a leader, who should be the president of the entire world?"
This Guy
"James from down the road. He seems to have his sh*t together."
"Had his Christmas lights down about the first weekend in January."
- baronvonbee
Turnabout
"The aliens."
- Renee_D608
"I for one welcome our alien overlords."
- GracchiBros
"Can't conquer the planet if we declare you leader upon arrival."
- Panic_Azimuth
"Aliens come to earth..."
"Humans: 'You are our new leaders. What next?'"
"Aliens: 'SON OF A BITCH! You know what? Nevermind, next planet'."
- josiahcruz__
"'No seriously, wait.. where are you going? We actually... no hold up, we do need a... damn it, they're gone...'."
"'We really screwed up, eh?'"
- Silver4ura
GiphyMommy
"My mom. Not even joking."
- rfd2115
"And then she start wooping their a**es (if they have any) with her 360° no scope slipper throw."
- Hefty-Cartoonist674
GiphyThe Best Boy
"The dog that is a mayor in that one town."
- cheeseonmypotato
"He's certainly got the qualifications."
- invisible-hand-shake
GiphyBBC?
"David Attenborough."
- _Snide
"The perfect ambassador of life on Earth."
- Ashtorot
"Not an option. The aliens would have sought him out in the earlier days to front their biographical documentary series. A once in a lifetime gig that one."
- ruka_k_wiremu
GiphyIt's Not Easy Being Green
"Kermit the frog so he can relate to little green men."
- joedagrinder
"And he’d play his little banjo to win them over and steal their hearts."
- call_me_cort
"The aliens might be a little concerned about the hand up his a**."
- fugue2005
"Don't they supposedly do that to abductees anyway?"
- AnonymousPerson4
GiphyWon't You Be Our Neighbor?
"Mr. Rogers"
- DJSp00k
"We get Bob Ross, Steve Irwin, and Mr. Rogers together to make peace with the aliens."
- dragonslayer694296
"So we're just raising all the dead and making them meet with aliens?"
- TFlo904
"Throw in a Betty White, and you'd have a zombie squad."
- 9gagiscancer
GiphyIdiocratic
"Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho."
- Reelplayer
"I was gonna say, Terry Crews, either as himself or as President Camacho."
- boot2skull
Who?
"The Doctor."
- oogeej
"It was revealed during the Twelfth Doctor’s run that every nation agreed to name the Doctor President of the Earth when there is an Alien Invasion, until said Invasion is over."
- bowtiesrcool86
GiphyDolly Would
"Dolly Parton"
- bluevelvetwaltz
"She’d turn it down. Proof she’s the right choice."
- mochalatteicecream
"'To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job'. ~ Douglass Adams"
- AceMosaic
"Nah, she'd do the Southern Refusal and then accept it when someone super unqualified tried to step in instead."
"But she'd make sure the aliens knew she is only doing it because the people wanted her to, which she'd explain while being a gracious host."
- Elaan21
GiphyPicking the right representative during first contact is critical.
Our existence could depend on it.
So, did Reddit get it right?
Or is there someone better for the job?
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RedditorMelonExtinguisherwanted to hear what "conversations" we could have from beyond our solar system that would be too much.
They asked:
"What could be the creepiest message from space?"
I figure a nice warning would even be creepy. Kind, but creepy.
Farewell
Bye Bye Peace GIF by Cappa Video ProductionsGiphy"Don’t remember where it’s from, but there’s a book or something where humans start getting messages from everywhere that are goodbyes from other species as the universe ends."
KhaoticKrabb
Sound Off
"Audible human screams."
Uncannier
"Winner right here. Yikes."
doctora_novia
"Or your planet's extended warranty."
kooshipuff
Where is Everybody?
"What the hell did you guys do with all our dinosaurs?"
FranksRedWorkAccount
"Bonus scare if the aliens tells them that the earth is like a breeding ground for dinosaur pets like we have for cats and dogs."
skisawsome
"We thought that asteroid was you getting tired of them, so we evolved into intelligent life."
GunzAndCamo
Tick Tock
"A countdown without context."
WodkaAap
"Would be fun to project a countdown into space to just mess with however did it. But just make our countdown end before theirs."
Kelmeckis94
"If it ends with 'Happy stellar new year' I think we'd be good."
Just-Call-Me-J
YOU
Happy Penn Badgley GIF by LifetimeGiphy"One claiming to be from Earth. In English. Describing us humans but very clearly not from Earth."
TheFreshHorn
Well that is more than we need to hear?
The Voice
Hannibal Lecter Killer GIFGiphy"A voice which is almost human but just off enough to make your skin crawl, telling us to stay away."
TheChainLink2
Hush
“Be quiet or they will hear you.”
Quint89
"I reread this every time it comes up in a thread - at least a dozen or so times now. One detail just occurred to me that hadn’t before: if the message left earth 40 years ago (eg this race of aliens are relatively close), and we’ve been broadcasting for 100."
The realization that a scientist has is much more profound then 'oh crap, this is scary better stop broadcasting'… more like “oh f**k, our 100 years of broadcasts are traveling out into space already, there are millions more potential recipients, and stopping now won’t change much, we’re already f**ked”
"That first message 100 years ago could just be reaching the big bad aliens now… and they have decades worth of a radio trail to follow."
Brown_notebook
Trust Issues
"Be careful, don't trust them."
Jumpingtojupiter
"There’s actually a really good Kurzgesagt video about this concept. And how it is actually quite logical that upon detection of another intelligent species both will immediately try to annihilate each other. And for this reason we probably should not advertise our existence to the galaxy."
nick1812216
DONE!
“Exterminate. Exterminate. Exterminate.”
MomCat23
"Yeah I was surprised we hadn't gotten more of these responses. Thought it'd be a go-to for a lot of folks, given how The Stolen Earth went."
nairbeg
Owl What GIF by NickelodeonNo thanks...
"It'd probably be an unsolicited alien nude pic."
Mr_Otingocni
"What if that's what crop circles are?"
Nobody_Super_Famous
Don't be Shocked...
"'People of Earth, your attention please. ..This is Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz of the Galactic Hyperspace Planning Council. As you will no doubt be aware, the plans for development of the outlying regions of the Galaxy require the building of a hyperspatial express route through your star system, and regrettably your planet is one of those scheduled for demolition. The process will take slightly less than two of your Earth minutes. Thank you.'"
"'There's no point in acting all surprised about it. All the planning charts and demolition orders have been on display in your local planning department in Alpha Centauri for fifty of your Earth years, so you've had plenty of time to lodge any formal complaint and it's far too late to start making a fuss about it now'"
Fragrant-Pass-3568
Strike 3
"We tried to give you a second chance. Unfortunately, you have failed us again and now we shall correct this mistake. Forgive us, goodbye."
Spidermanzinho
"Maybe the way the world's been the last few years has messed with my head but why does that scenario just seem so plausible?"
Loofs_Undead_Leftie
Just Us
Fall Scrolling GIF by Fia OrueneGiphy"We are dying. By the time you receive this, you will be the last sentient species in the universe."
peon47
Flood It
“'We’re sorry we couldn’t hold them any longer, may the cosmos protect you from the imminent horror you're going to suffer.'” And then a timer of 14 days shows up all around the globe and a blueprint of items to build something displays."
God_of_hoodies
"At this point I won't be surprised especially if it's the flood or tyrants."
variogamer
Change the Channel
"I'm getting bored of watching these. I was into for a few thousand years and they still haven't evolved past their own consciousness. Let's restart the simulation. Maybe the next ones will be interplanetary by this time."
RuneAcademy
"There’s no way for us to know for sure, but it’s theorized that there was calculus in there, among other things. Calculus wouldn’t be invented by other means until Isaac Newton in the renaissance. So yeah, it set us back at least a thousand years."
rl231661
Left Behind...
"We're sending a transport to pick you up. They will kill anyone who stays behind. The transport will arrive in 12 of your hours, and leave in 24 hours, departing for the refugee center at alpha-centauri. Don't worry, the transport has room for at least 1 million of you. And we're told the refugee center isn't so bad. Consider taking some pictures of your planet before you go, to remember it. Unfortunately we can't take cultural artifacts unless they fit in your carry-on. Please form orderly lines at the transport pickup location."
snapwillow
No One is Home!!
Season 1 Episode 3 GIF by Rick and MortyGiphy“Communication is dangerous. Stop reaching out, stop trying to find other life. We exist, we’re out here. But if they find out about you, they’ll be the first to visit.”
GunsandIndica
"What then?"
"One thing. I had a dream like this scenario once. In a voice that's just barely human, but too softly spoken to be something otherworldly, a message sent to NASA from an unknown source; saying: "'They've been giving us chances. For years now. I tried telling you guys...but my messages were never received...'"
"'It's all over. I'm sorry. All I can tell you now is that they're plotting... planning... waiting. I don't know how advanced things are on Earth now but... you NEED to come up with something to get out of Earth NOW. If not, get people underground. Deep underground, as low as possible. The world you know now? Forget it.'"
"'Everything you once knew is going to die. Prepare yourself, because if I know anything things are about to become a living hell. Good luck. And oh yeah! The most important thing you need to know is-'"
"The message cuts out."
"What then?"
sunwooosh
Let's all hope none of this can happen. My 2022 Bingo card is already full.
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But while the very thought of an unsolicited visit from beyond the solar system is terrifying, what if they want nothing more than to get acquainted with us earthlings?
And while our species is getting to know the other, Redditor cocoperrier had an interesting hypothetical he posed to strangers on the internet.
And that was:
"If aliens asked you to pick one song to represent humanity what would you pick?"
People didn't hold back from what they really had to say about our humanity.
An 80s Classic
"Everybody wants to rule the world 👀"
– Vv-V
Getting Along
"Why Can't We Be Friends?"
– theniqk
What A Conservatorship Is
"Toxic - Britney Spears"
"All aliens need to know that this is a traditional ballad from the cradle of civilization."
– brentus86
Our Clock Is Ticking
"The final countdown - Europe. First 80s song I remember hearing, first song I played on the sax (that wasn't part of my learning songs). It's a banger and always will be."
– Wynonna99
Shifting Blame
"We didn't start the fire."
– NirinQuing
Accepting Our Fate
"It's the End of the World as We Know it (and I Feel Fine) by R.E.M."
– mrmitchs
When putting ourselves in a positive light, these songs seemed appropriate.
Hey Now
"You're an all star."
– L0AD13
Two Choices
"Louis Armstrong - What a Wonderful World.....Would be the aspirational choice."
"Theme from Sanford and Son .....Would be my personal choice."
– KirbyBucketts
It's Quite Bubbly
"The Coke song:"
"I'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony…I'd like buy the world a Coke and keep it company."
– NorthernStockNoob
Holding On To A Good Thing
"Never gonna give you up."
– CLEETUSTHEMIGHTY
We Are Winners
"We are the champions of course."
– fantasy2301
These might work best as a playlist to welcome our martian friends.
Timeless Composition
"Beethoven's 9th symphony"
– Smooth-Reality-1434
"I was thinking Beethoven too, but one of the piano sonatas (no. 8?) or quartets (no. 14?)"
– GruckleBuck
"Welcome to the Jungle."
– Soylent-PoP
British Invasion
"Almost all the songs by The Beatles."
– dennis7x
I think there is no better introduction to humanity than the single most-performed song and most-translated song ever.
"It's a Small World (After All)."
The Sherman Brothers' earworm written for Walt Disney succinctly conveys a positive message of peace and brotherhood, and it represents the very essence of the humanity we can only hope to strive for.
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We must of course send Adele. As long as they promise to send her back. And if she goes... I'm going as well.
Steve
steve irwin GIF by BustleGiphy"Steve Irwin. He was great at handling creatures we think are strange and scary." ~ iamacraftyh**ker
"My first thought! What a legend he was! And his enthusiasm for life would be so disarming they would just go with it."
~ kittenharty
Carl
"Carl Sagan." ~ Vegaman11998823
"The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors so that, in glory and triumph, they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot."
"Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds."
"Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position in the Universe, are challenged by this point of pale light. Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity, in all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves."
"- Carl Sagan (The Most Metal Quote of All Time)"
~ MoxEmerald
Will we be destroyed?
"Genghis khan, for genocidal communal reasons." ~ HorseWest9068
"Mr. Khan! How'd the meeting with the aliens go? Will we be destroyed?" "No. I don't think they can do that anymore. On a semi-related note, I am now the Great Khan of the UFO and some planet I've never seen before. You're all welcome and also under my rule." ~ Frapplo
Rise & Fall
"Marcus Aurelius." ~ Stoic-Nurse
"I feel like this would be a good view. They wouldn't just receive a positive view of the world but a true view of the world pain and suffering but, from the ashes something great rises and many great things happen, empires, nations, kingdoms."
"All rise and reign for lifetimes. Many grow attached to that way of life and believe it will stand for eternity only for it to end in someone's lifetime. But those who came before saw them at their height and true beauty and those after saw it crumble and fall." ~ PeanutRecord698
Love Him!
Keanu Reeves Flirting GIFGiphy"Keanu Reeves. His film resume seems to be appropriate." ~ YEGMusic43
So far, so good. I'd trust Keanu with everything. And Steve Irwin... love him.
The Good Guys
bob ross GIFGiphy"Bob Ross, Steve Irwin, and that one really really nice old man across the street that gives you the best candy on Halloween and is always there to be a sprinkler for positivity energy." ~ Timely-Style-130
JC
"Julius Caesar probably. He was kidnapped by pirates and charmed them so much they kept him alive. Meanwhile, Caesar openly threatened them and said once he is rescued he would have them tortured. The pirates did not treat Caesar any worse and, sure enough, Caesar was rescued and put all the pirates to death." ~ EnumeratedWalrus
Who Better?
"Honestly? Myself. I don't truly know anyone else and although I know I'm far from qualified I still think I'd be an alright choice. Idk. Without a thought I'd say someone like Abraham Lincoln but who knows how crappy a person he was. Same goes with a family member. Yeah. My grandpa is amazing but I don't know how he would react to aliens. Hence I can only truly suggest myself." ~ darkcyberleon
Not Him!
"Anyone but Mark Zuckerberg. He already controls this planet. He gets access to anymore resources, the next thing you know he has all the infinity stones. The last thing anybody wants is a multi-universal identity theft lizard wizard containing omniscience." ~ essentialoils3
Arnie
"Arnold Schwarzenegger. He seems like a legitimate cool guy, with the special Olympics stuff he does and encouraging healthy lifestyles and such. He also seems fairly level-headed as a post-political leader, so I'd trust him to work out a good deal with the aliens."
"And if on the off chance the aliens have watched Predator, they would know Arnie is not to be messed with. Arnold Schwarzenegger for sure. Unless the aliens have housekeepers on their ships, then we should probably go with someone else." ~ ProcedureAcceptable2
Best Friends Bff GIFGiphy"After reading other posts it made me realized I can't endorse someone I haven't met. So I take back Einstein or Edgar Cacte instead my best friend and best person I've ever known Sandra (Flicka) Dukes. It was an honor to be her friend."
~GullibleEffect9399
So we do have options. Not many, considering there are 8 BILLION of us.
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