A bouncer has a tough job. Nobody wants to deal with unreasonable and belligerent drunk people. But someone's gotta do it.
Unfortunately this also means sometimes, the bouncer pisses somebody off, and then accidentally sees them in real life at some point thereafter.
These interactions aren't always bad, but understandably, they stick with the bouncers. It's only a little nerve-wracking to work these jobs...
The Boss<p>I was interviewed by a guy we had tossed out. I still remember his name because he was such a d**chebag that we banned him after this interaction and we all kind of laughed at his name because it fit his behavior so well. </p><p>Think "Kyle Blake," not his real name, but he has two kind of bro names as first and last.</p><p>Anyway, fast forward about a year, having finished school, and I'm at a staffing agency to interview for some crappy job. In walks Mr. Blake.</p><p>Unfortunately, nothing super interesting happened, but throughout the interview he acted a little strange. I never found out if he recognized me, but I was not offered the job.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Shilvahfang/" target="_blank">Shilvahfang</a></p>
Sucker Punch And Sucker Apology<p>I've bounced off and on for about 15 years in the same mid size city (about 150k people). One night as people were leaving this guy sucker punched another patron right inside the door. </p><p>Several other people quickly got involved. I grabbed Mr. Sucker punch and he spins around and squares up with me. I guess because I'm tall (6'6) people always seem to try and rush me and wrestle me by the waist. Mr sp was no different.</p>
Tales From The Bad Years<p>It happened fairly frequently with the regulars. As long as they weren't fighting, they'd be allowed back in the next night. Usually they were pretty embarrassed, and apologize for being a drunken jacka**.</p><p>One time I did have to kick out a good friend because he got in a fight. He was in a bad place, and was pretty embarrassed by the whole thing. We didn't really talk about it much afterwards. That was over a decade ago, and we're still friends today, and he's settled down and doesn't drink like he used to.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Chucklefluk/" target="_blank">Chucklefluk</a></p>
Baby I'm Sorry (I'm Actually Sorry)<p>Haven't been a bouncer in about 15 years but funny story from when I was, a guy I threw out and had to manhandle roughly (he was trying to hit me and other people) came back the next day, not to start trouble or get in again but merely to apologise and go. </p><p>Seeing somebody genuinely sorry was a very rare experience. He said and I quote <em>"I know I was a bit of a c*nt and needed a slap, I know I'm banned, I was off my nut and just wanted to say sorry and no hard feelings"</em>. It stuck with me because he really meant it. It really doesn't go like that most of the time.<span></span></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Lost_Afropick/" target="_blank">Lost_Afropick</a></p>
Domestic Dispute (+ Me)<p>Not a bouncer but a former bartender. I had to call the cops on a couple who had become angry and violent during a Sunday brunch. Both were arrested. The husband threw a glass at me, but the wife started swinging at the cop, so she got the worst of it. Rumor has it the husband was released later that day, but the wife spent a few days in jail.</p><p>A few weeks later I was in Walmart and spotted the couple. The wife didn't see me, but the husband did. We both walked away in opposite directions without saying a word. But truth be told, I was terrified.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/tamadrum32/" target="_blank">tamadrum32</a></p>
Oh Hey Leatherface<p>I have a slightly relevant story. My brother went to Uni in kind of a rough city, he was at a student bar and watched this guy get bounced. </p><p>Well, he and the bouncer crossed paths again that night... the guy <em>came back with a chainsaw</em>. Needless to say he ruined the fun for everyone else and cops were involved. Bouncer was not injured. <em>Hamilton Ontario, Canada for those asking!</em> <span></span></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/fetalpiggywent2lab/" target="_blank">fetalpiggywent2lab</a></p>
This Can't Be Comfortable<p>I was a bouncer in a higher-end Toronto club in 2000/2001. People were generally respectful and just out to have a fun night. The only real memorable ejection was from a couple we caught having sex in the ladies washroom. </p><p>It was very awkward, we had to ensure that it was consensual, and ask them to stop, and then escort them out. Because the bathroom facilities were limited to 3 or 4 stalls per gendered washroom, there was a long line up for the ladies room... The couple then had to do the walk of shame past the long washroom line up. They were then escorted from the establishment...</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/prime-meridian/" target="_blank">prime-meridian</a></p>
Hey! If You Have Ever Done This, You're Trash!<p>Ex-pub manager here, one evening I had a group of drunken young idiots who started a fight in my pub which needless to say ended up with them getting kicked out.</p><p>Fast forward a few weeks and I was having breakfast in a local cafe with one of my bar staff before opening when said group walked in and immediately recognised me, queue the verbal abuse and threatening behaviour so I finished up and left.... but it did not end there....</p><p>My friend had managed to keep most of them in the cafe (he half knew them) but one strolled out straight up to me... and dislocated my jaw with a right hook, followed by several kicks to the back as I went down.</p><p>Needless to say that day is why I no longer work in the pub trade.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/djfishstik/" target="_blank">djfishstik</a></p>
The Sweet Revenge Of The Law<p>I used to bounce at a club in Annapolis, if you can call throwing drunk spoiled little rich idiots out of the bar bouncing.</p><p>3 guys I had thrown out a few weeks prior saw me in a shoppers grocery store. They started following me, first talking sh*t and then throwing food at me.</p>
Okay Calm Down Supervillain<p>I worked the door at a punk dive bar, big part of the job is bouncing people who've had too much with the attitude "it's cool dude, we're all friends, but you've had enough tonight come back tomorrow." </p><p>99% of people that's fine and it works. One dude who had probably smoked something that night was fixated on the bartender wearing a Superman shirt and ran home to shave his head and came back challenging him to a fight.</p>
Hat in hand<p>This one guy in his 40s I bet came into my bar once and was clearly on a new level of drunk for himself. This was around Christmastime and it's normal to have people who don't normally drink much come in and not be used to drinking, basically, it's a really sh*tty time to work in a bar.</p><p>Anyways, he got soo wasted we eventually had to take him outside, he was hitting on girls half his age and was just generally obnoxious. Mind you bar was one where 18/20-year-olds would hang, more a club really, so he was very much out of his element.</p>
Elsewhere<p><span>I once went to a pub and realized I knew the bouncer from elsewhere. She was a nude model at an art class I attended.</span></p><p><span>-</span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/AltogetherGuy/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">AltogetherGuy</a></p>
Red and green<p><br>Former barman - had to "encourage" a lad to leave his work Xmas party after his elaborately choreographed karaoke rendition of "Like a virgin" with very pointed references to an older lady (his boss I suspect) did not go down well. Saw him the next morning working the till in the local supermarket- I've never seen someone's face go white ->red -> green so rapidly</p><p>-<a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/SeatAccording/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">SeatAccording</a><span></span></p>
Recovering Alcoholic's Wife Throws Out His Expensive Bottle Of Maple Syrup, And The Internet Is Understandably Divided
When one of your loved ones is a recovering addict, you may feel like you have to take extra precautions around them to avoid any potential triggers.
But in this particular couple's case, the wife was more triggered by the steps her husband was choosing to take in his recovery.
We all have those friends, well let's be honest.... we've all BEEN that friend. It's okay. Sometimes liquor gets the best of us. Often those five extra shots are NOT a good idea. Try to remember that. Nobody wants to have to babysit their adult friends. Now, often these moments lead to lifelong hilarious stories. But you need to watch how many stories you collect and actions come with consequence.
Oh Jim/Frank.<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjI3NzU5OC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYyNDA3NDI4Mn0.wTnKuPqFqZMKJ2DhxAQb-KIIgeuSsMK5CiVNVK-y2AU/img.gif?width=980" id="f94f4" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="e1dea9fd264d175f579792b2c8c0d4d2" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Giphy<p>I had a friend in high school who got naked every time he got drunk. As soon as Jim was naked we knew the party was over.</p><p><em><strong>Edit:</strong></em> his name was actually frank! <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fckv5cj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">Chickiepie</a></p>
Traffic Issues.<p>Traffic was stopped after a college basketball game so he decided to get out of his car and chat with a cop who was there keeping an eye on the crowds leaving the arena, she arrested him for DUI. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fckspjj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">Coogles</a><span></span></p>
Testy Man.<p>I had a friend who would always pull out his testicles when he got drunk. No penis, just testicles. Sometimes he would attempt to play the piano with one testicle.</p><p>It has been about 20 years since I last hung out with him socially, but did this Halloween.</p><p>Sure enough as soon as he was wasted- he was necking back $1K bottles of wine he'd brought which added to the weird- he was ALL ABOUT his testicles. Still.</p><p>At least he left them in his pants but he spent the whole party chasing after me yelling "Tiny penis... HUGE testicles. Every time! Above average!" He also tried to convince my husband to sell me to him. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fcl6vt1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">underpantsbandit</a></p>
On the Leg.<p>Drunk friend was relieving himself in a bush. Someone tapped him on the back. He turned round, still continuing to pee, to find himself face to face with a policeman. Poor cop had pee all down his leg, but saw the funny side. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fckrc3t?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">jmhorne</a></p>
Oh Guinness....<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjI3NzYwNi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0OTg4Njk4M30.BVoPScUg8Xxyp7QThFBLQ3MPAmSVF-sQ6DlKUereEoY/img.gif?width=980" id="61298" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="50880947c7a89c633e6b76003fdd9e2d" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Giphy<p>My friend claims he was abducted by aliens one night on his way home from a local festival.</p><p>In reality, he drank way too much Guinness, tried to ride his bicycle home up the steepest hill in town, and blacked out in the process.</p><p>It was 5 years ago. We just argued about it, again, this weekend. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fckopek?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">PM_ME_B00TY_PICZZZ</a></p>
"bad roommates"<p>A guy I knew in college came to a Halloween party on roller skates and got absolutely plastered, and proceeded to roller skate up and down the stairs. This ended predictably to everyone but him, and he fell and got hurt. Due to the anesthetic effects of being super-drunk, however, no one realized how badly he was hurt. He passed out in the living room, and proceeded to pee all over the floor in the middle of the night because he couldn't walk to the bathroom. Turns out his leg was broken in 2 places.</p><p>I also just mentioned in a "bad roommates" thread about a girl I knew in college who stole someone's cat while drunk and hid it in our campus housing apartment. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fckifje?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">cactusfairyprincess</a><span></span></p>
Had a friend with a prosthetic leg......<p>Dumb, but funny. Had a friend with a prosthetic leg, only he never told anyone about it who didn't already know. He always waited until a party was going well into the night and everyone (including himself) was plenty drunk. He'd then produce a large knife and get everyone's attention before plunging the blade into his leg. He'd then throw his head back and scream in (fake) pain.</p>
Be Coozie.....<p>Retrieved a beer coozie that fell in a port-a-Jon.</p><p>Ate food out of the trash can with the Constanza excuse that it was "on the top."</p><p>Same friend. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fckqmvs?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">ill_change_it_later</a></p>
Need Blankets.<p>One of my favorite drunk memories was when I was probably 17 and we were drinking in a friend's basement and as everyone was going to bed one of the people there kept complaining about how uncomfortable their blanket was. In the morning we discovered he had been using one of those big rubber bottomed rugs (like the kind you would put in a laundry room or something). He was also literally feet from a stack of blankets. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fckppe5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">rampantapplejohn</a><span></span></p>
Not Mr. Ed.<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjI3NzYxNi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzNDYxMTU4Nn0.aiHEPrQWs1L2xOTNNXy6-s7msv9waLaMGzsuKqR8cuM/img.gif?width=980" id="be0cd" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="5a9d5a565fc73922c9470d73d082d02f" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Giphy<p>He punched a horse... a police horse... with the cop still on it... at Mardi Gras in New Orleans. He spent some time in jail for that one. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ehop56/whats_the_dumbest_thing_a_drunk_friend_has_done/fckjyh1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x" target="_blank">King_Kongs_Left_Nut</a><span></span></p>
After a wild night out, you unfortunately have to deal with the repercussions. Those being the dreaded hangover. Everyone has their own technique to deal with hangovers (mine is orange juice and lots of bread), and some of them can be pretty out there. Here are some of the best ones.
u/just_a_firenope asked: What is your go to hangover cure?
Always effective.<p>Water. Before bed and first thing waking up.</p><p>If I plan on drinking I'll put a couple bottles on my nightstand.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/my2020account/" target="_blank">my2020account</a></p><p>A ludicrous amount of water during drinking for me. Like I force myself to drink a ton of water, like 2-3 cups per drink or more. I pee a ton but even if I'm super drunk I'll wake up just fine in the morning with little to no hangover. Water and staying hydrated is the key.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/JimmyReagan/" target="_blank">JimmyReagan</a></p>
Solid tip.<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjE5Nzc0MC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYyMjE4ODMyOH0.4L7_om0hOTA7BgEbpsb_pCAaoSEcoc6oDkkVcVNttow/img.gif?width=980" id="331e0" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="d83f279b50f131936dd14157c165a9c4" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Giphy<p>Pedialyte is my ultimate savior. Much better than Gatorade!</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/RJacobson11/" target="_blank">RJacobson11</a></p><p>Put it in the freezer so it's like a slushy. Tastes much better.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/burplesnout/" target="_blank">burplesnout</a></p>
Nothing cures a hangover better than more alcohol.<p>A big breakfast and a Bloody Mary.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/BjOaNmEzR/" target="_blank">BjOaNmEzR</a></p><p>Bloody Mary, full of vodka, blessed are you among cocktails.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Arios1923/" target="_blank">Arios1923</a></p>
Yum!<p>Big steaming bowl of Pho. Warm broth settles my stomach and it goes down so well.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Demonico101/" target="_blank">Demonico101</a></p>
Breakfast of Champions.<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjE5Nzc0NC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY3MjY0NDE4M30.c7vF_NrGiJ7fncl8Z5C3YYNX1CTy-ba5MFBLFPYAP_g/img.gif?width=980" id="7d6ee" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="19427530d8fe93118fd3b526ab8fb067" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Giphy<p>Weed, Gatorade, and a breakfast/lunch that's horribly unhealthy (Mickey D's, 5 Guys, Dominos, etc).</p><p><span style="background-color: initial;">[deleted]</span><span></span></p><p>Just had a big basket of Long John Silver's for lunch. Can confirm, feeling much more functional now.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/lbeaty1981/" target="_blank">lbeaty1981</a></p>
Love a good egg.<p>Eggs and water. Too much alcohol depletes the amino acid (glutathione) involved in the preferred metabolic pathway, causing it to use another pathway and build up acetaldehyde, which is responsible for the hangover. Eggs are high in cysteine, which is a precursor to glutathione, and helps get your body get back on track.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/khalov61/" target="_blank">khalov61</a></p>
Sounds about right.<p>A nice greasy slice of pizza before bed and a baconeggandcheesesaltpepperketchuponaneverythingbagel in the morning with a large ice coffee.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/dizzycraig/" target="_blank">dizzycraig</a></p><p>Found the Jersey person.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/gxsia_/" target="_blank">gxsia_</a></p>
Finally, a sensible one.<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjE5Nzc0OS9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY2MDk4NjI5N30.SPn-5J3whAulgJCoybuuCIF17GE1kR6eoKtTvQODVw8/img.gif?width=980" id="49116" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="010ca165284f813cb9b3706c33d2b875" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />Giphy<p>Eat some pickles and drink some of the pickle water, it has more electrolytes then Gatorade.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Uberwolf18/" target="_blank">Uberwolf18</a></p><p>Alternatively, only do picklebacks the whole night.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Dnpc/" target="_blank">Dnpc</a></p>
Also good advice.<ol><li>Sleep</li><li>Get out of bed</li><li>Try not to die</li><li>Get something to eat and a gallon of water</li><li>Don't die and sleep more</li></ol><p>Or my favorite one: just don't drink.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/ObnoxiouslyFortunate/" target="_blank">ObnoxiouslyFortunate</a></p>
First dates can be awkward; ridiculously painfully awkward. In my case they've been particularly awkward because not everyone involved has always known it was a first date. Yeah. It's been cringey.