People Who Made An 'If We're Still Single At 30' Marriage Pact Explain How It's Going
Reddit user eurekathatsit asked: 'How is your “if we are single by 30, we’re getting married” friend doing?'
Most of us like to set goals to motivate us toward a desired result rather than waiting for something to manifest itself.
The goals that are typically positive may include achievements like reaching a specific body weight, completing higher education, or saving enough money to purchase a home.
And then there are the goals that are more like consolation prizes because they seem unattainable in the present, like securing a relationship by a certain point in time.
Those who might be familiar with the last scenario shared their updates when Redditor eurekathatsit asked:
"How is your 'if we are single by 30, we’re getting married' friend doing?"
Tragedy strikes.
Canceled Plans
"Had a Married at 40 option."
"Lost contact with her for a few years and had started to rebuild our friendship. She’d got married and moved away, but was in the process of splitting up and remembering her old life."
"Had arranged to go and see her in her new flat, big night out planned. But then contact suddenly stopped again."
"Found out about 6 months later that she’d had a car crash and died instantly. Her (still) husband hadn’t told any of her old friends what had happened."
"She was the first one from our friend group that had died. It hit hard. Still think of her often and the mischief we got up to in our late teens."
– GeeGeeDub
Cancer Sucks
"We both got married before 30 to other people. She married a cool dude and had 4 kids. They had a beautiful family and so do I. I was genuinely happy for her and glad we didn’t 'end up”'with each other. She died of cancer a few years ago when her youngest kid was still in elementary school. My heart breaks for her and her family. I feel closer to them than they realize because I knew her since middle school. I think of them often and hope they are finding peace and happiness in this crazy life."
– walkabout16
Loss Of A Dear Friend
"With us it was 'if we are still single at 65 let’s just move in together - at least we like each other.' We met first year at university and had been close friends ever since."
"She died of breast cancer at 63. Miss her every day."
– Nagsheadlocal
Some managed to find success, while others, not so much.
Married Life
"Not me, but I have a former coworker that made that pact with his senior high school prom date. Lost touch for 7 or so years. Reconnected at the 10 year high school reunion. Got married 2 years later. Now 2 kids with a third on the way and VERY happy. It was cool to watch the majority of that story go down"
– Accountabili_Buddy
Going Along With The Ruse
"I married her sister. I never wanted to marry her, she was my friend and she thought of the 'if we aren’t married by 30.' thing."
– TheChzMouse
Tending The Garden
"He’s unhappily married to someone else. Spends all his time gardening now."
– MrFurleysJumpsuit
"so uh how’s the garden?"
– whatproblems
Love Success
"I kissed her this morning when I was leaving for work, we get married in 3 days."
"No joke, made the pact, reconnected in person after a few years on my 31st birthday which is 3 days before her 30th, we went out for a date and we haven’t spent a night apart since. And in 3 days we say the ol I Do’s."
"Thank you all for the kind words and the awards, I’m going to show my fiancée this later after work, she’ll love it. Wedding is in 2 days! (Aug. 18)"
– ArcAddict
A Wild Life
"She’s been living a WILD life. We made the pact at 22, she got married by 24, divorced by 25, new relationship and got pregnant at 26, married at 28 and divorced at 30."
"In that time she dropped out of college, went back to college, completed her associates, got nailed for a few drug charges and is currently fighting for custody of her kid with the dad."
– Goopyteacher
The feeling wasn't mutual when the pact was revisited.
Taking A Pass
"I’ve made that pact with so many people that I hope no one comes to make claims when I turn 30."
– anonfallenstarz
"So about our pact."
– TheNonMurderingSort
Seven's A Crowd
"He has like 5-6 kids. He actually hit me up when we were 30 (were 32 now) and asked about the deal. I was like “dude don’t you have like 5 kids???” I was not gonna take on that circus 😂"
– yoinkss
Bad Timing
"We made the pact at 15 as a joke. We finished high school, college and moved into early adulthood while he dated other people. I was single until 23 when I met my match who I’m still with to this day."
"This year he broke up with his girlfriend because he said he loved me and couldn’t be friends anymore because it was too hard for him."
"It sucks but I wish him the best."
– Caramel_Kind
It's understandable why people set such goals, especially if they want to make sure they are not settling for each other after kissing a few frogs.
But who's to say true love won't manifest in your 40s?
It's not an ideal benchmark, waiting to see if the other person has either found love or is still waiting by 30, because love is unpredictable and seems to come when you least expect it.
As they say, love is patient.
Unfortunately, people are always not.
Day by day.
Moment by moment... we march closer to our final days on earth.
It's the natural cycle of life.
Age comes with a lot of life price tags.
We gain wisdom but we lose years.
It's all a give and take.
And as much as it's great to be alive.
Loss still sucks.
That makes the side effects of age, worrisome at best.
Redditor stofugluggi wanted to discuss the inevitable... the process of ageing.
So they asked:
"What are you starting to like less and less the older you get?"
Not being able to dance as fast. I miss going at 100 miles an hour on the dance floor.
Shopping Mecca
Stranger Things Indiana GIF by netflixlatGiphy"Malls. Used to love hanging out at the local mall with friends as a teen but as an adult, I fully just beeline straight to what I need to get and then it’s just survival mode until I get back to my car."
bbqwingdings
The Old Place
"The typical bar scene. I get off work and want to unwind. I don’t enjoy the loud, nearly shouting level of noise at the typical bars. I want medium volume bars that are fun and lively, but not noisy. I miss my old, favorite bar. COVID economy killed it. Craft beers and good appetizers is what I want after a long day. Not shots and drunken fools."
xrayboarderguy
Good Days
"Being sick. It was an excuse to stay home and play video games when I was a child, and my body could usually fight it off pretty well. Sick days weren’t even that bad. Now my body hurts a lot more with much lesser illnesses, symptoms linger around much longer, and many times it’s not serious enough to justify staying home so I just have to go about my day anyways."
"If I do get sick enough to stay home from work I am nowhere close to being in good spirits. I am not playing video games all day long. I am laying in bed contemplating where it all went wrong."
Jailbreaker_Jr
Highs/Lows
"Enjoyment and happiness doesn’t hit like it used to. I am still generally happy and enjoy doing things, but it doesn’t get me as excited as it has in the past."
Hihihi93
"I had an older friend who said getting older was like the roller coaster ride evening out. Highs not so high but lows not so low."
woodstock923
I’m 25 and I feel this, imagine in the future. God…"
numerionegidio
I'm Tired
The Simpsons Winter GIFGiphy"Getting up in the morning. I mean, I love the fact that I’m alive, but sh*t getting up and out of bed suuuuucks."
redditor_5678
"Bed is soft and warm. The world is cold and hard. I choose bed."
sourdoughbreadlover
Affairs with our beds. The life goal.
Me
Twin Peaks Mirror GIF by Twin Peaks on ShowtimeGiphy"My life and choices."
Spazzycattt
"For real. Dealing with the consequences of those choices made in the past is not fun."
InflatableRaft
Stay In
"Leaving the house lol."
droopyheadliner
"I can relate to this. I was highly extroverted prior to the pandemic. I loved socializing and enjoyed meeting new people. Now? I’m too anxious and depressed to even leave my house sometimes. I’ve turned down most invitations for social hangouts because I can’t bring myself to meet anyone in person."
titaniumorbit
"This. People in public are so crazy and obnoxious now. Rather stay home and chat with friends through xbox."
patricio87
Remember the Fun
"Social media. It's vapid, boring, and a continuous stream of advertisements now. I remember when it used to be fun. Now I've deleted pretty much all forms of it except Reddit."
squeakycheetah
"Dude literally everything is advertisements now. It’s getting exhausting. Even iMessage games are littered with advertisements. I remember when instagram had just one advertisements you had to skip in between stories, now there’s two. If you wanna go to the next story on Snapchat, there’s an advertisement you have to look at before you can. I hate it."
Ac997
"All the major social media sites are basically melding into TikTok."
jordy_muhnordy
Leg Joints
"My knees."
monkeypickass1
"Right there with you. I even got rid of one of mine and have an aftermarket model now."
htownlifer
"I've had knee issues for practically my entire life because of my poor diet. God was it painful seeing everyone in school on recess do squat (?) exercises then I'm just here with my knees shivering and hurting and barely able to do a few of them. Luckily I've managed to fix them a bit over the years but when I get older that sh*ts coming back."
Wyvernator1
Cash Cow
Donald Duck Money GIFGiphy"Spending money. When I was younger, I’d save up cash and buy clothes and shoes and food and all kinds of useless sh*t."
"Now I’m in my 30s and it feels like I’m bleeding money just to survive. I’m currently looking for a new apartment with in-unit laundry and you’d think having laundry in your apartment was a luxury for kings and queens. How does anybody afford anything?!"
Burrito_Loyalist
Wow, when you put it all together, you see the scope of change.
Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comment section below.
There are many TV shows with compelling themes and interesting character developments that impressed both critics and audiences alike back in the day.
But some of the shows that once captivated audiences have not aged well, and there are many elements in them that are outdated by today's standards.
Curious to hear examples of these, Redditor lilac_cup asked:
"Which tv series has aged like milk?"
The handling of these controversial TV story lines seem so careless in retrospect.
Addressing Child Abuse
"The very first episode of Hill Street Blues has two cops breaking up a domestic disturbance caused by a woman finding her man f'king her 15yo daughter. The man is told not to be sh**ty, the woman is told to put out more and the child is told not to be so tempting. Then the cops leave, patting themselves on the back for a job well done."
– kifferella
The Teacher's Secret Relationship
"Pretty Little Liars. I think even at the time, the teacher dating his 16 year old student storyline was considered creepy, but in 2022 it’s honestly unbelievable that was ever portrayed in any kind of positive light. Also that her parents didn’t immediately just report him to the police."
– ColdFIREBaker
Forbidden Attraction
"Not the whole series but Ally McBeal. In one episode Ally found out her bf is bi and her reason breaking up with him was she afraid that one day her bf would be attracted to their son."
– thrussie
These reality shows would never fly in a "woke" world.
Racist Cringe
"There was a reality show on Fox called 'Black. White.' Where they put a white family in blackface and a black family in whiteface."
"Just reading about it, it turns out the white family wasn't even a real family. They were unrelated actors."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black._White.
– MichaelJAwesome
Extreme Makeover
"Extreme makeover. I remember watching this show as a kid and being like oh wow they’re fixing all these ugly people with plastic surgery and making them happy. I just think that caused a whole generation to think they could change their body with money. Show lasted like 4 seasons. Couldn’t imagine that show today."
– thenightshifters
Teen Exploitation
"Secret life of an American teenager."
"Just what…."
– carlirodriguez8
A Critique
"My god this show was terrible. My wife’s sister was into it and we ended up watching a lot of it when we were dating. I think they tried to make the banter like Gilmore Girls, but it ended up being the characters repeating their current plots and arcs over and over. I don’t remember the characters at all, but the main character was such a horrible person, and the audience is supposed to root for her."
"The main things I remember about it were the religious girl claiming she killed her dad by having sex with her boyfriend, and apparently you go to Bologna to get bjs."
– MachFighterG
So-Called Expert
"You Are What You Eat."
"Host Gillian McKeith (or to use her full medical title, Gillian McKeith) was an absolute quack with an online medical qualification from a Mickey Mouse university. She pretended to be a scientist by being recorded standing around in a lab wearing a white coat, spouted unscientific nonsense that anyone who had done a GCSE in science could see through, and was obsessed with getting people to shit in Tupperware boxes."
"It got cancelled after the final series when you had to have her move in with you. In the last few years she popped up again as a prominent anti-vaxxer once COVID vaccines became available."
– MattBD
These pageant shows glorifying good looks and talent would never be greenlit today.
Performing Pressure
"Dance moms- used to be entertaining, now all I can see is the psychological effects it must’ve had on those girls."
– KE789
"Americas Next Top Model has to be #1."
"From all the behind the scenes sh*t that went on in production to what the show actually shows. It’s all just horrendous."
– Nickster1619
From Ugly To Beautiful
"The Swan, was 2 women who are considered 'ugly ducklings' participating in a pageant against each other after undergoing a three-month transformative process aka having heaps of plastic surgery."
– twozedzed
Psychological Downer
"Right?! How were they allowed to do so many procedures in such a short time while completely isolating these women from their families? Making them diet and exercise while healing from a tummy tuck, breast implants, and veneers?! The 'therapy' sessions were a joke and were just for show while these poor women with low self esteem were preyed upon for entertainment. Just out of a safety and medical prospective…wow."
– Snoo-8746
Judging The Reflection
"Didn't they also not allow the contestants/patients to have mirrors the whole time so they were surprised when they saw themselves? Psychologically having massive changes like that and it being sudden is extremely bad for your brain, you can end up rejecting the reflection because it's not 'you.'"
– Delouest
As audiences evolve, so does the writing and development of all forms of entertainment.
But because the changes are gradual, it is jarring when looking back and noticing how offensive and isolating some of these shows can be.
Times sure have changed in the world of entertainment–mostly for the better.
It's always interesting what ages well and what doesn't.
And, for that matter, how quickly something ages.
How often do we find ourselves sitting down to watch a film or TV show from only ten years ago to see how poorly it holds up?
Or, for that matter, how ten years ago we thought something would be the next big craze or trend, and instead see it become obsolete with each passing year.
Redditor jerydajery was curious to hear what things people were attracted or fascinated by a decade ago, but have little to no interest in today, leading them to ask:
"What was attractive 10 years ago but now isn't anymore?"
Blogging
"Honestly, I miss the blogging culture."
'Articles written with honesty and passion, mostly to connect with real-life friends first and online audiences second."
"Only the biggest bloggers could make a living off blogging."
"They were the original influencers."
"Easy to avoid though because there were just a handful of them, unlike the influencer culture of today."
"The one thing I love about blogging culture were the honest reviews."
'No advertisers to please, just regular folks writing their opinions on something they’ve used long term."
"Back then Google even had a specific search engine exclusively for blogs."
"Blogs were proper article length."
"Then Twitter came out and no one has the attention span anymore."
"That was the beginning of blogging downfall."
"What a shame."- Aemilia
Will probably skip the reunion...
"My classmates."
"Swear, every one of them is on crack now."- DOEsquire
GiphyWon't be much use anymore...
"Mayan calenders."- ThreeEdgeSword
Who.Knew.
"2020 definitely sounded attractive 10 years ago."
Did people actually do this?
"Having a moustache tattooed on the side of your finger."- garynzilla
GiphyDid anyone rock this look though?
"Girls rocking that Han Solo look."- CregDerpington
Everyone's getting so tense...
"I remember everyone going nuts about thigh gaps."- baeraerm·
People must have wanted to lighten the mood...
"Black granite countertops, apparently."- genteelbartender
Not so "hip" any more...
"Hipster culture made a 180."
"Now that's just a bad stereotype of a millennial."- steamedpasta
GiphyNo need to prove you're wearing underwear!
"Sagging your pants."- Ramdom901
"When your thong was visible above your pants."- deliriousspacechild
When in doubt, stick to your natural look.
"Smudged mascara around chick’s eyes."
"Don’t forget the OG guy liner."
" I personally never saw the appeal but everyone had it from 06-12."
"Oh, and the individual streaks of colored hair dye."- Charlirbravo
Slow and Steady Wins The Race...
"Being the fastest in class."- damangofr
Running Late On My Way GIF by MinionsGiphyBushy is beautiful!
"Thin eyebrows."
"Hope that doesn’t come back."- Difficult-Shallot-67
The "Beeb" would agree...
"Justin Beiber haircut."- Devitomann5000
Now they come digitally...
"Spam letters."
" All the time everywhere."
"Now you don't see them anymore."- Ninge3007
A tarnished legacy?
"Johnny Depp?"- Gompedyret
Hold on while I update my status.
"Being active on Facebook."- QuantumR
social media facebook GIF by weinventyouGiphyThe world becomes a different place with each passing year.
One can only imagine things we can't get enough of today which we won't be able to bear the sight of in ten years.
Though, it's safe to assume one thing we wouldn't mind seeing less of are medical masks and mobile testing sights...
Beauty.
We all want to attain it.
Some people dedicate their lives to having it.
But who can say what is and is not attractive?
The older you get, the more serious and realistic you get with the topic.
And grapple with whether it really matters.
Redditor Big-Courage-7297 wanted to know what some people really thought when they looked into a mirror.
"How hot do you think you are? Why?"
Depending on the minute and the era, I fluctuate in my response. Oh, and depending on my sodium intake.
Middle of the way...
Mackenzie Ziegler Makeup GIF by Brat TVGiphy"5, am not ugly nor a beauty."
son-of-sumer
"'Perfectly balanced, as all things should be' JK... you probably look great."
math_math99
Alright
"I give myself a solid 'alright for an old guy' out of 10."
TungstenkrillYup.
"Comparing myself to when I was young I feel like a 2. However if I look around at other guys my age, I'm doing pretty great. Simply still having a full head of hair puts me in the top 15%."
sarcasticorange
"Occupying the latter half of the age bracket here too. And while I’ve never considered myself wildly attractive, one of my wife’s work friends once remarked to her, 'you didn’t tell me your husband was a silver fox!' I keep that one in my back pocket for gloomy days."
Ryanbikes2
Mama Said...
"My mom said I'm a 10/10."
gamer25677
"His mom also said I’m a 10/10. Im starting to think she says that about everyone who’s been inside her."
AlwaysMooning
"Don't listen to these jealous haters you be that 10/10 and strut your stuff."
"Learning to love yourself, doesn't mean you don't see your own flaws but know where to improve and where and how you want to grow. Appreciate the goodness within even when it's hard, and work to have your ideal to be reflected on the outside too. Loving and forgiving yourself is the greatest peace you'll know, because everyone else might be gone at the end and you'll be left with you and your memories, make good ones. Spread positivity. 💕"
SevWagoner
Changes with time...
"I think most people's scores fluctuate with age. I like to think I was a solid 8/10 in my early 20s. Then my metabolism crashed and I was working a desk job. I got real fat, got lazy, less effort, dropped to a 4/10. Got my s**t back together, lost the weight, started putting in the effort again, back up to an 8 if not higher in my 30s."
"Then I had a traumatic event in my life and I slipped into a dark place for many years. I put on weight again, stopped putting in the effort, general depression stuff, 5/10. Now I'm in my 40s, working on keeping my weight down, putting in some effort, solid 6/10..."
"But no matter what has happened, how low or high I've been... my wife has always considered me a 10. She's the best woman I've ever met and will always be a 10 to me too."
Bannon9k
Oof...
Freaks And Geeks Photo GIFGiphy"6 or 7 on a good day? 1 when I try to take a picture of myself."
baconpoutine89
God I hated picture day. Still do.
Bless You
"I have days where I think 'God da*n, look at me. I’m God’s gift,' and then other days where I think 'how does every mirror not break?'"
Conconharni
"Actually though. Part of it is I used to be super athletic but due to an injury now can’t, but go**amn, I could look quite literally like a sculpture of a Greek god or hero, but also a balding baby-faced creep. Also occasionally homeless. More often the two latter than the former"
Walshy231231
Getting Higher
"I think I was a 6 growing up. But now that I've matured into my late 30s I'm a solid 7."
Ok-Type9999
"This is me except as a kid I’d give myself a 3. Long-haired greaseball in my teens but now in my 30s, exercising for the past decade has really helped me out. Solid 7/10."
Fine-Difference-6896
"Man, I went from 4 to 8 to 5 in the span of 20 years. Metabolism is a *itch."
ELL_YAY
Bad Views
"I just remind myself that the me that looks bad in in some pictures/at some angles is the same me that looks good in other pictures/other angles, just a different version. There are some angles and types of lighting and mirrors that for whatever reason, will make just about anybody look bad. There is no such thing as someone who looks good when the phone camera opens itself and shows a view of you from under your chin."
StreetIndependence62
Boy Magnet
ichabod crane mirror GIFGiphy"I was objectively pretty hot when I was younger. Now I am an older hot, which is weird. Younger guys really dig me but I’m like, you weren’t even born when the Challenger blew up and I was at Uni."
dearabby1
Me Too
"8/10 if you're into dad bods."
"2/10 if you're not."
mbpeters13
"This is me too. I’m tall, broad, decent muscles (especially my legs), but also a little chubby with long wavy hair and a decent beard. I always say I’m a straight 6, a twink 2, and a bear 8."
roygbivasaur
Liquid Courage
"3/10 today."
"I got bullied way too much as a kid and my self esteem is non existent."
"On a good day with makeup on and liquid courage in my system I can feel like an 7 or 8."
archangel1223
"I can relate. I did not even realise fully how much it changed me until years after it ended."
Faifainei
So am I hot?
"I used to believe that when kids smile back to you when you smile its because you are cute. Recently my young cousin said she smiled because she thought my face was funny looking when I smiled. So when i asked her if I was good looking she said, 'Hell Nah!!!'... kids have no filter. So am I hot? To that I respond HELL NAH..."
sharpie-sapien365247
Unstable
Jason Sudeikis Snl GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Is 'not' a fair answer? Given my track record, I have astronomically poor odds of someone actually finding me attractive and wanting to take a shot on me. Then most of those people are typically very unstable."
anongentry
Oh the Vanity
"Dunno, I’m always harsh on myself. So I’d naturally rate myself low as hell, but at the the same time I don’t hate looking at myself thus making it hard for me to rate myself. I’d definitely need outsider’s perspectives on me to form that vanity better."
MilkLight
Lackluster Days
"Between 8 and 9. 9 on my best days, 8 on the lackluster ones. Strong jawline, straight-across-board-level shoulders, 6'1'', in good shape, awesome hair, sky blue eyes."
"Edit: getting an awful lot of people sending me DM's and really ridiculous replies to this. It sounds to me that I was 'supposed to say' 0/10. Food for thought guys, confidence is a good thing. Especially if it's accurate."
BurnedOutStars
Back Then
I think I'm an 8. Getting fitter and drinking less may take me above that. I base this entirely on a conversation I had with a group of girls during study hall in high school. They were bored and making a list of the hottest guys in school. They were arguing where I fall in 3rd, 4th, or 5th. I was shocked, it was a big high school.
"They may have been pulling my leg, but I have internalized the narrative that, and to this day tell myself, out of hundreds of random dudes, I consider myself in the top 5."
NotAFederales
Grow Fast
hipster beard GIFGiphy"At the moment I'm a 4 or 5 because I let myself go in the last year but when I was in shape I was definitely a solid 7. I regret shaving my beard too."
stevothepedo
"Beards grow back bro! Stay confident 💪 Hit the gym even if it’s only once a week. Start small and build back the habit, you got this!"
Eragon_
We're all beautiful. Just keep saying that. Maybe it'll stick.