Strangers online came through with the fantasy scenario when Redditor Ithaqua3406 asked:
"If you suddenly had 'f'k you' money what would be the first thing you did?"
Some Redditors felt philanthropic.
Family First
"Retire my immediate family."
– Ziggu12
"I'd pay off my parents' house and other debts and then send my brother a check for $0.81."
– She_Persists
This One's For You, Pops
"I'd retire my dad (46M) immediately. After my mom left when I was 13 (25M now) he stepped up to be in the role of both parents to us 3 kids and we struggle bussed pretty hard for a few years until i was able to start working to help out even though he said i never had to. I haven't seen my mom since I was 17. Both my younger sisters and I are eternally grateful for this man. He taught me everything I needed to know to grow up and be the man I'm now today. So, I'd return that favor. I'd buy him a house with a big a** garage and work space so he could work on his classic cars and trucks all he wants. I'm in that mindset now, I'm working to not only have a successful life right now but to take care of my own family and him."
–Slwrolla
Let the indulging begin.
Simplified Order
"I'd order Dominos without optimising the order to fit one of the deals."
– Si1Fei1
"Changing it to pan? Dollar fifty more. Bastards."
– DrGPeds
Unobstructed View
"I'd buy the first 3 rows of a Ja Rule concert to keep them empty."
– Usr_115
"50 cent is that you lol."
– eks91
Tough Lesson
"I'd get dental implants so I wasn't in constant pain/ didn't look like I started every day with a hearty breakfast of crack."
"Edit: The feel compelled to say that I've never smoked crack or meth in my life. I did all my damage with cigarettes, sugar, and good old fashioned neglect. I didn't brush my teeth nearly enough, often going days or weeks between brushing. Yes, depression. I didn't feel like there was a point, and now I'm at a what I consider to be a catastrophic level of damage. I haven't actually felt any tooth pain in a very long time unless you count poking my tongue or cheek with a jagged bit once in a while. I had two initial quotes from dentists, one for $15,000 and another for $17,000. Both came with the caveat that they'd likely cost more because of an unknown number of extractions that'd require surgical removal. Dental tourism isn't really an option, I'd be looking at multiple procedures requiring recovery and return trips that I'd rather not make internationally, alone, and require being put under for surgery, I'd rather not go that route. I live paycheck to paycheck, and not well. I bring home about $2800 a month and finances not covered by my medical insurance (and even those tbh...) in the scales of thousands of dollars are a fanciful dream not even worth thinking about for me. Yes. America."
"If you read nothing else in the post:"
"Brush your f'king teeth."
– uglymiddleagedloser
A Tasty Luxury
"Get a permanent personal chef, so that I can eat delicious food all the time, and in a relatively healthy way."
– Alkazeel
"This here is overlooked. Having some great chef that would also double as grocery shopper doing great food 3 or 4 days a week? Under 10 grand a month."
– PhillieUbr
Who would need a job?
Not these Redditors.
Peace Out
"Quit my job. I'm at the point I may do it anyway honestly."
– e22ddie46
“'What’s the point in having f'k you money if you can’t say f'k you.' Bobby Axelrod"
– smitcal
Off The Grid
"Disappear."
– YoungHermit92
"pay for a helicopter to come pick you up from work, 2 guys in suits come out, ask you to come back 'for one last job', you say you were retired, and ask why can't John handle it, the suits just shake their heads and say 'it's worse than last time, and they already have John.'"
"you look back, wave your coworkers goodbye, and get on the chopper, never to be seen again."
– Dravarden
See Ya Later Alligator
"Quit my job. It's not that it's a bad job, I actually do like it, but I don't have time for it! I would rather live my life and go on adventures. So many things to see and experience in this world and life. :)"
– chocolate_orca
Alternative To Quitting
"Never quit. Purchase the company while still working in the trenches without revealing that you're the new CEO. Begin making all the decisions you can see should happen because you're there. Fire bad bosses and managers, get yourself 'voluntold' to go to other stores/offices for various excuses, listen to the fellow employees b*tch about corporate and quietly fix the problems they bring up."
– Bridgebrain
Worthy Replacement
"I’d buy the company I work for burn it down and collect the insurance money and build a public restroom in its place."
– Doublecutz
If I had money burning a hole in my pocket, I'd rent out Disneyland for the night so my LGBTQ+ friends and I can have the happiest place on earth to ourselves in a safe space without the judgment of conservative guests.
Oh, wait, I already experienced that when Disney hosted their official Pride Nite last month!
Then I'll pay for another night of that, please, but this time at Walt Disney World in Orlando because they didn't host such an event there for a certain reason.
There'll be lots of rainbow balloons, confetti, and queerness all over the entire resort to make our presence known in the Sunshine State.
Methinks that's the ideal "f'k you money" scenario.
Redditor Shadowclook21 wanted to hear about the times we've seen people waste money on nonsense, so they asked:
"What is the dumbest thing you've seen someone spend their money on?"
I get we all like nice things, but we have to be smart with our coins.
Wake Up!
Good Morning Time GIF by Berk's Beans CoffeeGiphy"An alarm clock coffee machine. It was me."
ineedanusername_
When on FB
"My wife is in a lot of mom groups on Facebook. The amount of people who beg for help for their poor babies who won’t get any Christmas/birthday gifts who also show off brand new giant tattoos is amazing. She shows me every time she finds one of these people and it happens all the time. Usually multiple recent photos of them out drinking and partying as well."
"So yeah, there’s a lot of people out there who blow big money in tattoos and partying instead of setting aside a little bit of money for their kids."
clocks212
Scratched
"Knew a girl who would spend all her money on scratchers and drugs. She would constantly go on about how when she finally won big she was going to move and get clean.... He grandmother gave her a 20 - 30k inheritance. Nothing changed except how many scratchers she would buy. I saw her buy out whole rolls occasionally. She wised up with the last few thousand and put some advance rent on an apartment (was in a motel) and fixed her car. But that money was gone in less than 2 months."
Sub_pup
60 Bucks
"PSA: Accidental subscriptions. Remember, kids, if you sign up for a free trial, be prepared to cancel that s**t the second they allow you. Otherwise, they'll start charging automatically."
xisiko1120
Kaboom
Im Ready Independence Day GIFGiphy"My neighbors once spent all their money on a private firework show, then had to hide their cars from the repo man for months. No longer neighbors."
redheadedstepchild54
Neighbors are always going to neighbor.
Classics
sia diplo GIF by LSDGiphy"I bought a cassette tape two weeks ago. I don't even have a way to play cassettes but I still bought it."
sibipi3040
They're Everywhere
"My Mum has spent $1000s on crystals and stones. She continues to, and gives them as gifts, I have no idea wtf to do with them so I put them in my plants pots then she gets upset for some reason. Send help please."
Necessary_Oil_9779
"Get her a rock tumbler and have her tumble her own and try to identify them. Cheaper in the long run. Makes for a more interesting hobby too, if she gets into it. It will get her out of the house and into nature. Crystals are everywhere, they literally litter the earth. A lot of ordinary-looking rocks turn out quite beautiful once they've been tumbled."
TerrifyinglyAlive
Just a Waste
"I dated a guy who would still use his debit card even when his account was over drafted because he didn’t realize he was charged overdraft fees for every transaction. I had to explain to him his single snickers bar or bag of chips or whatever from the vending machine was now costing him an extra $35. And he did this multiple times every single shift he worked."
beaniequeeny
5 More Minutes
"Gambling machines. I work in a bar room. People will play these machines for 12+ hours and never win. Then they Win $700 the next night and think they’re on top... it’s insane. They look like zombies sitting there in a trance. Once had to unplug the machine on a patron who would not leave for closing. Kept saying '5 more minutes.'"
BrianFrom97
OnlyCrap
"I worked with a guy who'd spend 200-300 bucks a week on OnlyFans. He'd brag about it, I guess he thought of he'd spent enough he might get lucky or something."
TheRealJokar
Why do some people spend with such abandon? It makes no sense to me, but it's not my money.
Have you ever witnessed someone blow a load of cash on something crazy? Let us know in the comments below.
Curious to hear from strangers online, Redditor Icky_the_Eskimo asked:
"What things are 100% worth the money?"
These are conveniences that are worth the money and can make life so much easier.
Helpful Household Tool
"A good vacuum cleaner. You don’t need to buy a Dyson, but get something better than the $89.99 basic model."
"Edit: I recently bought a Shark. I wasn’t about to spend twice what I paid for that on Dyson. I’m very happy with it. The amount of dirt it pulled out of my carpets was significant."
– DrProfessorSatan
It Holds
"Good brand Duct tape."
– Full-Worldliness-820
Kitchen Companion
"An enameled Dutch oven. The French-made Le Creuset and Staub cookware are wonderful, but you can buy a Lodge enameled Dutch oven for a third of the price. Worth every penny."
– danappropriate
This Combo Would Be Ideal
"A bidet"
"Non-stop flights"
– TruthOf42
It's more than about keeping up with appearances.
If The Shoe Fits
"Good quality shoes."
– RifleShower
"Yeah, I had to get boots with a harder and thicker sole to wear while walking and doing normal tasks. The ground here is rough, a thin and soft sole is going to cause me issues. Plus, I don’t slip in rocks anymore and find walking uphill much easier. It all depends on what terrain you’re on though."
– [deleted]
Choosing The Fashion
"well made clothing that:"
"fits you properly"
"can be used in a variety of uses (social, professional, recreational, etc..)"
"is designed to last, or can be repaired."
– upfjords
Snug Fit
"A well fitted and well made bra."
– D33nasaur
"I second the Nordstrom tip. They have a huge selection for all sizes & styles and once you find a brand & style you love, you can order from the manufacturer if Nordstrom no longer carries your fave. Plus, they will not be undersold. Wacoal probably offers the best support but their bras are not sexy. Elomi makes a perfect t shirt bra and Glamorise makes killer racer back w/front closure bras for large breasts"
– zestyspleen
Comfy Undies
"Ex Officio, tight, not loose. Sports material that is just amazing in hot weather, feels like silk, and stops your legs rubbing together if that’s a problem. Great for humid climates and travelling. God, I love them, they changed my life ! Too much underwear-related ranting, but I recommend them to everyone."
– zenconkhi
Safe Sex
"A teenager came through my line earlier that couldn't afford condoms. I took what he had and let him take the condoms. I'll deal with my till being short later. What's important is that he's safe and there's no babies or diseases afterwards."
– twitchy_taco
Good services are well worth paying for.
Hard Labor
"Hiring a moving company."
"You do all the small packing yourself and then hire somebody to move the large pieces of furniture. It’s amazing and removes so much of the stress of moving."
– OddFeature
Customer Satisfaction
"Can’t preach this enough. We just moved Wednesday, only 25 minutes away. Cost us $3,080 but it was 100% worth it. Zero stress. All done in one day. My wife just pointed and they moved it into the correct room and reassembled."
– mattlind12
Regular House Cleaning
"Once a month maid service. Probably the best thing I’ve ever spent money on."
– crapballsfacef'k
Life experiences can create valuable memories for a lifetime.
See Some Sights
"Traveling. If you wanna go somewhere, do it. I’ve never said to myself 'man I wish I never went to that place and spent that money.' I’ve got memories and stories now. Experiences that I’ll hold onto dearly for a long time. That’s worth more than any dollar amount. (Obviously be smart about your planning… but yeah. Just travel as much as you can)."
– iamaviamarie
Wanderlusting
"Solo traveling is fantastic. I get to please myself and answer to no one but myself. If I want to spend 3 days looking at art I can. If I want a rest day, I'll have one. Best thing ever."
– aquila-audax
Getaway
"A vacation away. I know so many people who say they don’t travel because it’s too expensive—and I mean friends who I know have the funds."
"It resets you. Can be the highlight memory of your year. It’s worth it to get away and indulge for a bit every once in a while. Especially if you can!"
I can't agree with the above more.
Traveling is definitely worth spending money on. Seeing the world will open up your perspective, being exposed to different cultures can be inspiring, and the friendships you make alone your journey is priceless.
There are ways to travel on a budget, so the excuse that being a tourist is too expensive is moot.
Also, much of the world have reopened their borders following the pandemic, so traveling to many destinations are now possible.
If you've always had the travel bug, what are your waiting for? Get out there and find your adventures.