Surprising Things Teachers Did That Somehow Didn't Get Them Fired
Reddit user stockstandardly asked: 'What DIDNT your teacher get fired for?'
There are certain things that are bound to get you fired in just about every profession.
Being nasty to colleagues and clients/customers, misusing company money, and first and foremost, not showing up to work.
When it comes to teachers, however, there are even more rules that others might not think of that are guaranteed grounds for dismissal.
Or so we think.
As some teachers manage to get away with shocking, if not downright apalling behavior and still manage to stay in the classroom, and out of the rubber room.
Redditor stockstandardly was curious to hear some of the most outrageous things ever done by teachers who managed to hold on to their jobs, leading them to ask:
"What DIDNT your teacher get fired for?"
You Thought There Was Only One...
"Y4 teacher put gaffer tape over the mouth of talkative students."
"Regularly."
"History Teacher invited me (16yo) over for beers and smokes."- stockstandardly
It Is Possible To Be TOO Close...
"Y5-7 gym teacher showered with us (the boys) because apparently there was chewing gum in the drain in the teacher's shower." - Runkepapir
Nobody Knew, Or Nobody Did Anything?
"I knew of two girls in my grade (age 16-17) that had inappropriate relationships with two separate teachers."
"Nobody was punished because nobody knew."
"Which makes me think this kind of thing probably happens all the time."- Green0livesAndHam
No Harm, No Foul?
"We had this little old lady for our all-male music class(16 years old) and she loved us and we all loved her."
"When we left the class she would slap our bottoms and we'd joke around trying to not get hit and dodging it and just goof off."
"We knew it was absurd and inappropriate and so did she but we all thought it was hilarious."
"I was always worried someone would narc or another teacher would see it and say something."
"She was the best. Hilarious woman and a good teacher."- SkinkaLei
How Much Proof Do They Need?
"Purposely slamming a student’s hand with the door."
"Hard."
"Happened a year after I graduated hs but there’s video footage of it out there somewhere."- lecstasy
Schools Should Be A Safe Haven...
"Telling the whole class to beat me up after school and defending them when I defended myself."- QuiescisMagna
'Spare The Rod And Spoil The Child"?... ABSOLUTELY NOT!
"I remember when I was in elementary school and my sister as well."
"My sister would always come home complaining of her bottom hurting and having trouble sitting."
"Back in school days during the 80s, they would give wooden paddle licks to kids for misbehaving, etc."
"My mother confronted my sister one day for all the complaining."
"She made my sister pull her pants down and saw multiple bruises on her bottom."
"My sister confessed that her teacher was giving paddles to her for however many multiplication problems she missed on her tests."
"Apparently, she was getting licks quite frequently."
"The next morning, when dropping us off at school, my mother was infuriated and stormed into the office and gave them a piece of her mind."
"Showed them the bruises on my sisters bottom."
"My mom fought hard to get the teacher fired, but they never did."
"The only thing they did was move my sister to another room, and the teacher stopped paddling kids."
"My sister never told my mom she got licks."
"I never did either.'
'Because you were scared of getting in trouble at home."
"Because getting licks at school meant you got in trouble at school."
"You didn't want your parents to find out."
"Can you imagine what would happen to the teacher in today's world?"- Safe-Block-7993
TEMPORARY LEAVE?!?!
"8th grade science teacher was asked if putting hair in dry ice as an experiment would create a reaction."
"Teacher said 'let’s see'."
"And proceeds to grab scissors, walk to said student, and cut off a two inch chunk of hair, close to her face, halfway down her waist length hair."
"You could hear a pen drop as he wordlessly walks over and tosses the chunk of hair into the box of dry ice."
"No reaction but he was put on temporary leave a week later."- InternalDreadIncomin
Learning By Anything But Example
"11th grade, teacher was clearly not heard by even a single student to say during a bomb threat that she hopes they blow the whole place up."
"This is after her husband got fired for knocking up a student."
"Not a single person heard her loudly proclaim she wanted the school to go boom, so she wasn't fired."
"Lol."
"Loved by all is an understatement."
"Another teacher 9th grade year wasn't fired for backing my friend into a corner and looming over her with his hand on the wall above her head."
"F*ck you, Mr Hanks."- GreenOnionCrusader
Far too many students feel unsafe at school for a variety of reasons.
Their teachers should never, EVER, be one of them.
And one bad teacher has the ability to ruin it for all the extraordinary teachers out there.
'Something's Not Right Here' Gut Feelings That Have Actually Saved Someone's Life
Why do humans doubt the inner voice?
Or that sickening feeling in the pit of our stomachs.
That's our intuition at play.
Some are more in tune than others, though.
And most of us just act like it's not there.
But when we do listen, when we do take that feeling seriously, it can save lives.
The gut knows.
Redditor IChronoI asked the online community:
"Hey Reddit, When did your 'Somethings not right her' gut Feeling ever save you?"
My gut has never been wrong. Sadly, I never listen, so I'm always wrong.
Being Alive
Giphy"My mom and her entire family were saved from dying from Carbon Monoxide poisoning by her dad. He left for work, got a weird feeling and drove back home. Everyone in the house was unconscious, and he had to drag or carry them all outside one by one. They all survived."
bellrunner
"Hey, deer"
"I used to just drive around country roads when I would feel stressed out or sad as a way to just get away and listen to music. One evening I was driving with my best friend in the car and we're on a gravel road that has a huge hill. We were driving towards the sunset but it was winter and the light was fading fast."
"As the car started down the hill I had this moment where I thought to myself 'my brights should be on' and I flicked them on and at the bottom of this super steep hill stood 6 deer on the road. I slammed on the brakes and the car turned sideways and skidded to a stop like 4 feet from the deer."
"Those stupid deer didn't even move, they just stared into the passenger side of my car and my best friend pointed at them and said 'Hey, deer.' The car was fine, we were fine, and Bambi was all good. I don't drive around like that anymore."
unhiddenninja
On the Beach
"My sister since she was about 5 was always obsessed with Tsunamis and would always ask my dad every night before she went to sleep if there would be a tsunami that night (we lived on a beach)."
"About 5 years later when our family was holidaying in Samoa an earthquake struck at about 6am."
"It was only a dull low rumble but went on for over a minute. Everyone at the resort woke up and went outside for a few minutes then went back to bed. My sister having been obsessed with Tsunamis ran down to look at the water and noticed the sea going out and saved a lot of lives including my own."
"There was about a minute from her noticing till the Tsunami hit. Luckily for us there was a cliff right behind the resort if not alot more people would have been killed."
"So something like a gut feeling 5 years in the making."
MWizzle
Class is in session...
"Not me but my science teacher, when she was a teenager she was standing near some lights at a pedestrian crossing with her and her friend. Very chill but out of nowhere she had this gut feeling that both of them had to move."
"They moved just a couple metres away and the next moment a car had hit another car and had hit one of the street electricity utility poles and it had fell and exploded (minor explosion enough distance away that it didn’t hurt the girls) exactly where they were. One of the wires had also snapped and hit it exactly where they were standing as well."
"They basically were in a scene of car wreckage and snapped wires and electricity explosions and the pole collapse. Just real insane. If the pole had missed them, the wire would have hit them and if not that then most likely the cars."
"That gut feeling of moving away saved both of them. I remember this story so clearly from high school science class because it was such a WTF, pity I only paid attention to these things and not actually science... hehe."
Yanked to Live
Yelling The Goldbergs GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy"I was walking out of a grocery store when I saw this kid about to cross the road. Something came over me and I yanked him back onto the sidewalk. Not even a second later a truck came flying past. He was probably around 7 or 8ish."
incognito_polarbear
This is why I just stay home and order in.
An Ordinary Day
Baseball Referee GIF by StickerGiantGiphy"Few years back I went to uni in Brussels. I would always take the train to get there. One morning I just woke up and didn't feel great at all."
"Keep in mind I have had a horrible flair up of Crohn's for the last weeks. But this felt different. Guess it was my gut. So instead of pushing through it like I did with my Crohn's, I decided to stay home for once. This was the only day out of 2 that I ever stayed home from Uni. That day the terror attack happened on the train that I usually ride to get to Uni."
somuchgold
In the Storm...
"I woke up from a deep sleep at like 2AM during a winter storm, something wasn't right... I immediately went looking for my senior dog and couldn't find her anywhere in the house. My roommates had a tendency to let her out for a walk and forget about her, closing the door."
"I ran to the front of the house and found her laying on the welcome mat, she was hardly breathing and covered in snow... She had been outside alone for at the very least 5 hours. I moved out shortly after."
Cafilkafish
Out for Drinks
"I went out with my best friend on new years last year and were having drinks with her friends when I realized I was out of cigarettes. I left for a few minutes to walk over and grab a pack and ended up talking to a homeless guy for a while, and when I went over to the entrance of the bar she was outside and said something mean to me for no reason and walked off."
"I was confused so I decided it would be good if I took a walk to let her cool off and then figure out what she was upset about. I was going to walk down the street for a bit but something told me to turn left, walking behind the bar and then turning to the side of the bar when I see a girl laying down on the sidewalk and people walking by her."
"As I'm walking over to help I realize it's my friend and she's not very conscious. She was probably drugged while I was getting smokes and who knows what would've happened if I hadn't decided to go that way. Scares the sh*t out of me."
kornfanja666
Eat First
"I was walking to the barbershop, and for some reason, everything just felt off. I ignored the feeling but every step I took just made me feel like something wasn't right, so I decided to just go grab some food and come back. While I was eating I saw police cars and ambulances driving to around where I was before, it turns out there was a murder. Now I always listen to my gut feeling."
beastin01
I Was Right There
cougar Htown GIF by University of HoustonGiphy"I was building a fort in the woods near my house as a kid. Got this eerie feeling that something was wrong so I packed my stuff and made my way home. Next day, on my way to school on the bus, my friend mentioned a cougar his family saw running across the road that was within a couple hundred feet of where I was. It just so happened to be at the same time I was out there."
mc_freak2013
Listen to THAT voice... it knows all!
Do you have any similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.
There are several things we think, for better or worse, will likely never happen to us.
Sometimes, they might be things we wish, even pray, will happen, such as winning the lottery or marrying a royal.
Then there are the things we are grateful for that the chances of them actually happening to us are slim to none, such as a rare, terminal illness, or being struck by lightning.
Unlikely as these experiences are, they do indeed happen to people.
Such as the extraordinary case of Australian Bill Morgan, who in 1993 came back to life after being legally dead on the operating table, and went on to win the lottery not once, but twice!
"Were you ever that 1 in 1,000,000? If so, what's your story?"
Unexplained Malaria
"Not me, my wife."
"We lived in Jacksonville, Florida."
"She rarely gets sick, but has mild insomnia."
"Around Wednesday, she had a low fever, and complained of aches and sweats at night and trouble sleeping."
"That weekend she wanted to see the Doctor."
"I told her she probably had the flu, just wasn't used the aches, and she always has trouble sleeping, but if she was still feeling bad Sunday we'd go to a clinic."
"Saturday night she couldn't sleep so we made an appointment for Sunday afternoon."
"But on our way there, sure enough she's feeling better."
"Doctor checks her out, she's feeling fine now, no fever, he says she probably had meningitis but is recovering."
"I'm due to go on a business trip to California the next day, Monday, and ask him if he thinks it's fine I go."
"He says, yeah, no problem."
"That evening, wife is eating and laughing and all is good."
"Monday morning I leave early."
"That afternoon, my neighbor calls, and lets me know my wife was wandering in the street in a delirium."
"My wife didn't know where she was, so the neighbor drove her to the ER."
"I book a flight home that night."
"The hospital checks her out."
"She has a fever, her blood cell count is in the basement, and she is completely out of it mentally. "
"They're not sure what's wrong, and a bunch of specialists start descending on her."
"I have to fill out a bunch of paperwork on her medical history, where we've been, etc."
"They think maybe it's some weird auto-immune disorder."
"Not good."
"She gets a bunch of transfusions and put on a cocktail of meds while they figure it out."
"Third day in the hospital, the infectious disease guy comes in."
"Blood parasite."
"Maybe tick born."
"She'd been to the mid-West recently, coulda caught it if she went walking in the woods or a park."
"Next day he comes in."
"Figured out the parasite."
"'Why didn't you tell me she left the country?'"
"Huh?"
"She hasn't."
"'Well, she has malaria'."
"Malaria?"
"I thought you couldn't get that in the U.S."
"'You can't, you need to go home and bring me her passport'."
"What the hell?"
"I retrieve her passport."
"CDC comes, does a whole case study on her, which they wouldn't release to us."
"Mosquito traps setup around the neighborhood, mysterious vans start driving by spewing clouds of stuff."
"My wife stays in the ICU for a week, but recovers just fine. "
"If you look at the 2010 CDC Infectious Disease report you'll see a discussion of malaria, and how the XX number of cases all are related to people recently returned from endemic areas, except for one woman in Duval County, Florida who received it from a cryptic vector." Reddit
Invisible Appendix
"When I was 14 years old, I woke up one day with heavy stomach cramps."
"We called the hospital and they told us that i probably have a stomach flu and should go to the doctor next morning."
"After one of the worst nights ever, vomiting and sleeping next to the toilet we went to the doctor."
"I had a fever of 40 °C and was aching a lot."
"The doctor told me I had to to go to ER and have it checked out because she thought my appendix was inflamed and causing the pain."
"We went to the ER and I stayed in the hospital for about 2 weeks, but they couldn't find anything."
"They treated me with broad range antibiotics and after 2 weeks I was feeling a bit better and they told me to go home and recover."
"The night i got back from the hospital I went to bed and started hallucinating that I lived in a retirement home and that pirates were coming to steal our food."
"So I was flailing around trying to fend of pirates when my mother came in and asked what all the fuss was about."
"I told her what was going on and she looked at me like I had summoned a devil."
"She took my temperature and she instantly took me to the ER again."
"I had a 41°C fever."
"When we went back to the hospital I got treated immediately for inflammation and they did a wide range of test again."
"They saw that something in my body was inflamed but they couldn't find it."
"I stayed in the hospital for about 2 more weeks when they finally found what was going on."
"My appendix was inflamed and burst the night ."
"I was having the hallucinations but on all the scans they couldn't see my appendix."
"The doctor told me that if I came in 2 days later I would have died because of the puss flowing in my body."
"Apparently there is a 1% chance of all the appendix cases that the appendix is so stretched out that they couldn't see it on the scans or that the area was so inflamed they didn't see it."
"So after staying on antibiotics for about 2 more weeks they finally removed my appendix and all the pain was gone."
"I stayed in the hospital for over 4 weeks just because of my appendix and my bad luck on being that 1%."- Warplevel
Making The Happiest Place On Earth Even Happier!
"For my seventh birthday we went to Disneyland."
"They just happened to be having a car a day giveaway when we were there."
"For my seventh birthday, Mickey Mouse gave me a Pontiac firebird."- CaptchaGremlin
earth reasons GIFGiphyUnique Allergy
"I'm allergic to potatoes."
"Never met someone else who is so I guess it's one in a million."
"Never eaten chips or fries."- Mannaminne
Life Saving Bacteria
"I was diagnoses with leukemia i got a bacteria growth wich killed the leukemia, a real 1 in 1,000,000 chance."
"I almost died thanks to that bacteria though."- InNeedOfFriend
An Odds Defying Love Story
"How I met my wife."
"I’m from the Netherlands, she is from the US."
"We met in Israel."
"It was my first weekend in Israel, decided to go on a pub crawl to meet some people and have fun, as I’m buying the ticket my now wife walks up to the counter to also buy a ticket."
"The girl working there introduces us, we hit it off the first night but I’m leaving in 2 days to stay with friends of friends in the middle of the desert for 3 months."
"2 days after I leave I lose my phone, don’t have any way to get back in touch with her."
"I had little money and could stay/work with the people in the desert."
"But I kept thinking about her so after a week I say I’m leaving."
"Take the next bus, goes 3 times a week, at 5am, and then a train to Tel Aviv."
"I had no idea how to find her, where to stay and very little money."
"I email a couple hostels to find a work/stay agreement."
"Those jobs are very popular and usually planned months in advance."
"I get an email back when I arrive in Tel Aviv."
" I can come in for an interview because they have a spot, this is already ridiculously lucky."
"Right after the interview and dropping of my belongings, I went back to the first hostel to see if they would give me information."
"They wouldn’t give me anything."
"Now I’m at a loss, Tel Aviv is a city of more than half a million people, I don’t know anyone and have little more than the clothes on my back."
"Kind of defeated I start wandering around/exploring the city."
"After a couple hours I get hungry and decide to treat myself to a restaurant."
"I’m well out of the tourist area and find a place that’s almost empty and rather cheap."
"I sit down, order a drink and something to eat."
"As I get my food I see my now wife walking past the restaurant."
"She sees me I see her."
"I’m literally dumb struck and just kind of grin and wave."
"Remember how I lost my phone?"
"She didn’t know that and just thought I ignored her."
" She waves and keeps walking."
"I throw like 200 shekels, way too much, in the table and sprint after her, explained and the rest is history."- Dominusatrox
John Cusack Serendipity GIF by MIRAMAXGiphyJaundice
"I am a 19 year old male. In August of last year, I was driving with my sister, when suddenly her face turned cold. “Gavin your eyes are yellow”, I remember her saying. I quickly pulled down the passengers mirror, and to my horror, two yellow eyes radiated back at me.""
"Fast forward, I spent a month being sick, the initial diagnosis was Hepatitis A.
"Went back to the doctor, nothing was better(things were worse in fact). Was sent to the ER, then to the liver transplant unit at UCSF. By this point my eyes had turned muddy orange, and my pee was the color of... a mahogany tree."
"Anyways, the team of liver doctors at UCSF managed to save my liver. I was diagnosed with autoimmune hepatitis. Oh, and my eyes are white again :)"
User Deleted
Crash
"I survived a “non-survivable” plane crush. I was on an old po-2 (famous for being very safe and uncrushable) on a tour of the desert in western China when I was like 7, my father’s friend who hosted me and piloted the plane didn’t survive but somehow I got out with a concussion and apparently passed out for almost a day In the middle of the dessert, in the wreckage of the crash, 50 km from the town/airport, on the edge of the desert. The people who found me were some tree planters (they plant greens in the desert to protect towns from sandstorm, a lot of people live in these desert towns in China do this) found me on there way picking up a shipment, and the only reason they looked was bc they were making a bet on how fast the egg would cook in the sand and went off the road to test."
"First thing first, according to legends, 15 min, I never tested it though. So, according to my dads, the theory that I might have lived was because the plane was mostly made out of fabrics and wood. So when the plane crashed, the front half collapsed and took the majority of the impact. Though I got knocked out, I was probably covered under the wreckage and in the shades, it cooled me off enough to survive for a day or so!"
yusenye
Tumor
"Had two 11cm benign tumours growing in my spine, resulting in gradual paralysis from my chest down. They had no idea how the tumours formed. Surgery took 11 hours when they thought it would take 4 because the tumours were so complexly woven throughout my spine. I now have pretty much half a spine and chronic pain but I’d take that over losing my life from paralysis and being unable to breathe 🙏🏼"
erieberie
Lucky 7s
"I was born on 7/7/77 and weighed 7 pounds & 7 ounces. Sadly though I clocked in at 6:50 A.M."
"The other is that around the age of 14 I started to notice the outsides of both of my feet starting to get much wider. After a couple of years of buying expensive custom-made shoes they decided to perform surgery on my feet. Turned out I had extra muscle growth along with something else I don't recall at the moment. My podiatrist told me he submitted a scholarly article on it. May also have been genetic as when my Dad was 3, he developed an extra toe growing out of each one of his big toes."
indiesnobs
You never know when the odds will, indeed, be in your favor.
Sometimes, when the odds seem against you, it's still worth it to give it your all, as you may find yourself surprised and happy with the results.
On the flip side, always best to be prepared, as you never know when your luck might turn on you...
On occasion, all of us look in a mirror and wish there was something about our physical characteristics that was different.
Being a few inches taller, having a different hair color, maybe a smaller nose.
But then, as we continue to stare at our reflection, we might suddenly realize there are some things about ourselves which we don't mind at all.
In fact, we might even be proud of our eye color, the shape of our ears, or having an enviable jawline.
For most people, finding their best attribute might not be so difficult to determine, owing to slim pickings.
But for those blessed with good genetics, choosing their best physical trait might be a bit more difficult.
Redditor askredditiscool was curious to hear what people with enviable genetics considered their best physical quality, leading them to ask:
"People who have 'won the genetic lottery' what qualities do you have?"
Come and get me!
"I'm not allergic to mosquito spit."
"So they bite me and I feel the pin prick, but I never get that red swollen itchy-as-hell welt."
"I also apparently taste bad enough to them that they will go for anyone else in the area before me."
"Ticks, on the other hand, will hunt me for f*cking miles."- open_door_policy
Million Dollar Smile
"No wisdom teeth!"
"The trade off is the ticking time bomb that is my cancer genetic..."- Opin88
"Well, uh my father and I have the bottom half of our wisdom teeth fit in and the top half of them don’t even exist."- MasterYoda092
"My teeth are nearly perfect."
"Whenever I switch dentists, they are a bit stunned at the first appointment."
"My husband hates me for it."- BilobaBaby
Happy Dance GIF by benjamin lemoineGiphySo flexible!
"I can actually lick my elbow."- Soulerous
Unbreakable?
"Strong bones."
"At age 72 I've fallen several times in the last few year, low blood pressure, and have never broken a bone in my life."- Duegatti
Pure blood indeed!
"Not a single blood related person who had or has cancer for at least 3 generations."
"Meaning parents, grand parents and grand grand parents and all their children and children's children."
"Or any other inheritable disease."- yohoho_99
Sleeping Beauty ain't got nothing on me...
"I inherited the Sleep Button gene from my grandfather."
"When I want to fall asleep, I just... do ...in a matter of minutes."
"I haven't struggled with falling asleep/waking up more than ten times in my entire lifetime."
"I can't nap for sh*t."- VertebrateCrossing
I got time...
"Not sure yet but like I may live a really long time."
"People on my mom's side just have exceptional lifespans."
"My great grandma got in a bad fire at age 45 and had third-degree burns everywhere."
"No one thought she'd recover or live very long."
"Out of pure spite for the husband she has been separated with for 23 years, she lived till she was 96."
"This was in India and she was upper lower-class."
"Meaning the healthcare was sh*tty."
"My great great grandpa lived till he was around 116."
"He maintained his capability and independence till the very end."
"In his last few years, he started to lose his eyesight and hearing but he still cooked his own food, bathed himself, did the house chores, etc."
"My grandpa is at 78 right now and he'll hopefully remain in good health."- a-lovelyy-ladyy
Old Lady Dancing GIF by MattielGiphyThe Lucky One!
"Not me, but my dad."
"All of his siblings, except his older brother, have heights within the range of 4’11” to 5’4”."
"All of my dads brothers are balding/ have been for years, and the rest of them have noticeably grey hair."
"His mom is 4’11, and his dad was 5’5."
"My dad is 6’0” with a full head of curly hair, and he only has about a 1/2 an inch of grey hair on the sides of his head.
"He’s turning 55 this week."
You win some, you lose some...
"I have severe scoliosis, I'm getting surgery in a few months."
"I was born with a heart disease and I still have a defected mitral valve from it."
"I have really bad asthma."
"But i have a 6.8 inch slong at 15 so its all worth it."- bremcrem
I guess I'm just perfect.
"I have no allergies."
"My parents are not the healthiest but me and my siblings have a super fast metabolism."
"Also, I am not exaggerating when I say my entire family has a genius gene."
"My uncle engineered the Dubai mall."
"My Great Uncle wrote a paper at Harvard, taught classes, wrote a book on anthropology, graduated from honors in UCLA and he was a foreigner."
"My brother got a full scholarship to Harvard."
"I have nothing but honors classes."
"My sister is going to dental school."
"My Grandpa, 4 uncles, and some cousins are all doctors."
"My dad was a lawyer before immigrating but when when he got a low paying job here he made a clause in our rent agreement that has saved us nearly 200 grand in rent."
"My other Great Uncle worked as a diplomat for our home country."
"My aunt has a degree in Sociology."
"Also my uncle is an architect in Germany and they all come from a war torn country, Syria, and yet still accomplished all this."
"Also, I am bilingual as well as everyone else in my family."
"I forgot that my other Grandpa owned a farm with workers and was mayor of the hometown."- OpportunityLazy4467
"I've been 110 lbs since I was 14 no matter what I eat."
"I'm 5'8 with long limbs and I still have curves for days despite being thin."
"Grey eyes and bouncy, shiny French hair."
"Light brown, thin but lots of it so it looks great and behaves just fine."
"It has always been kept long and reaches my lower back."
"The native in me means I can tan as dark as I like, I don't ever burn."
"I also love my cheekbones and the shape of my upper back."
"It's a very prominent gene as only my maternal great grandmother was native."
"Never any major health issues."
"Hated this when I was young and insecure, but having an A cup means no need for a bra."
"I f*cking love it now."
"They seem to cast a bit more of a shadow in my 30s, so I'm even happy with their appearance at this point."- newcowboys
perfection GIFGiphyThe Money I save on deodorant and razors!
"No one in my family gets body odor."
"Our hairs are so thin we don’t need to shave our legs."
"I’m unlucky and have to tweeze my armpits about once every two months but no one else needs to tweeze any hairs."
"Downside is our eyebrows are so thin that I need to get them tinted every so often."- ewc58
No diet necessary!
"I can really easily put on muscle due to how I process food but I also get fat reaaaallly easy."
"No middle ground."- MicrowaveCapriSuun
"I have a really really fast metabolism."
"I eat a lot and I' m still 36kgs."
"im 178cm tall."- UnEpicBoi
Some people are just born lucky.
True, it's what's inside that counts.
Which doesn't mean we don't still wish we had perfect teeth every now and then...
People Explain Which Situations They've Managed To Avoid Their Entire Life
Image by mohamed Hassan from Pixabay |
Life moves fast and chaos comes flying at us at warp speed. So it's a minor miracle when we look back at our life and see all of the craziness we've avoided. Like being struck by lightning. It happens more often than you'd think. So avoiding a strike here and there is a major feat.
Disasters and basic run of the mill stresses run amok, so be grateful when you can stand and say... "Never have I ever."
Who can relate?
Redditor u/poopcornkernelswanted to hear about people's strokes of general luck in life, by asking:
What have you managed to avoid your whole life?
I've never been to a Vanilla Ice concert. That's harder to avoid than you'd think, when all of your friends were obsessed fans. I'm a child of the 90's. It's a miracle I could pull that off, trust me.
Cuffs Away
Episode 1 Police GIF by BBCGiphy"Being arrested."
"One of my favorite stories in recent years was that 99 year old lady who asked to be arrested as part of her bucket list."
When you gotta go...
"Pooping outside. Not much of an accomplishment but during my employment for the US forest service I came upon the realization that I've never pooped in the woods and I'd like to keep that streak going."
"As a lifelong IBS sufferer I can say if you haven't pooped while looking out over majestic scenery you are missing out. Also having a group of people waiting for you to finish is very embarrassing."
PAIN!
"Kidney stones. I had problems getting on the right medication. Found one 5 years where the biggest side effect is kidney stones. Thank the lord it hasn't happened... yet."
- cboy6_9
"It is freaking HORRIBLE. Not to scare you, but I was in pain for about 3 months. It was insane. It's literally the most painful thing that's happened to me. I even had a mother of 2 with cancer say "I don't envy you, they're so painful it's horrible" which made me feel even worse."
"Apparently there's a high chance that once you have one another will come along fairly quickly due to... y'know... they're still being plaque in there and man, I am NOT looking forward to that. The moment I feel it I'm running to the doc and begging them for one of those fancy sound wave pulveriser things.
Health
"Cancer."
"Quite a few of my professors (biotech degree) worked in cancer research. They've all said that basically if you live a long enough, healthy enough life, cancer will get you in the end. The only way you don't get cancer is if something else gets you first. They also all agreed the only two things you should really, really concern yourself about in regards to avoiding cancer are - don't smoke/chew/use tobacco and don't tan."
"Everything else is negligible, so don't sweat all those sensational news stories about studies that say hot beverages cause throat cancer or using dryer sheets causes cancer. As one of them liked to say, "Life causes cancer."
"Edit: Of course, this is not to say that if you are healthy and avoid those two things, you will NOT get cancer, just that those are the two things that almost definitely WILL get you cancer. As well all know, sometimes cancer gets you anyway."
The Verdict
Sue Me Jury Duty GIF by Sabrina CarpenterGiphy"Jury duty."
"Aaaaand... just pop back in and let us know when your summons shows up. It should be within about a week."
I'm grateful to be able to say "Never have I ever" on a few of the big ones here, thus far. Fingers crossed that trend continues. I can attest, pooping al fresco isn't that traumatizing.
Coin Counting
"Wealth."
"Funny enough i was thinking the other direction: Debt. I've managed to avoid all long term debt up to this point. Dumpster diving to closed equity investments."
"It did mean there were times when we literally sold everything we owned and lived in our car... Starting out your life with debt is a handicap, and despite the struggles not having our future mortgaged has made it possible for us to survive."
- Oriumpor
Stung
"Getting stung by a bee or wasp."
"I was walking with a friend in high school down this wooded hill full of brush and debris. At one point, my friend (about 10' in front of me) turns around and goes "Whoa!" He doesn't say anything else, I follow suit, turn around, and there's a huge nest of Yellowjackets. Well, they didn't mind my friend, but he apparently put them on guard because me stepping over them enraged them."
"I ended up sprinting down this wooded hill, lucky my foot didn't catch on a branch or something. I ended up getting stung 9x I believe it was; Three times on my back, one on each ear (so much heat radiates from an ear sting), two on one arm, one on the other, and one on my legs. I couldn't sleep well for a few days, everything hurt."
- Gashnor
No Joke
"Addiction and pregnancy so far."
"You're lucky, for many people and myself including, it only takes a week to become physically addicted to opioids. A week on kratom and I'd get withdrawals even. It's so messed up. Opioid withdrawal is by far the worst out of anything. I can kick alcohol and power through the withdrawal a dozen times now, but not once have I been able to withstand any opioid withdrawal."
- user deleted
Love
Happy Four Weddings GIF by TLCGiphy"Divorce."
"Never been in a relationship so I'm steps ahead (or behind) haha."
I'd rather eat bees than watch "CATS." That movie nearly ruined movies. Talk about being traumatized.
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