Life is full of double standards and double edged swords. Which of course means that life... is eternally unfair.
Whether it's a sexist issue, a work issue, a race issue, there always seems to be levels of judgement that leave certain parties feeling slighted.
A perfect example is curfews. I can understand having a later curfew when relating to age, but when growing up, several of my female friends had earlier curfews than their younger brothers. Fair? I think not.
Also, parenting is full of double standards. How many times was I told not to curse when half of the adults out there have the mouths of sailors? Mhmmm...
Redditor u/CLHiddenInPlainSight wanted to discuss the most egregious unfairness in life by asking:
What's the WORST double standard?
One of the most stressful and aggravating places for double standards is the workplace. If we all work hard and stay focused we should all be rewarded accordingly. So often that is not the case. Women and people of color and gender expressions are often overlooked in order to promote less productive people. I call BS.
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"My Boss has brought me into his office repeatedly to tell me I don't do enough work and that we are all swamped right now. My Department is short staffed. Yet he has no issues sitting at his desk watching movies all day long, yet if I sit for five minutes to shoot off an email I am wasting my time."
Wining and Working
"I used to work nights by choice, which meant that occasionally I'd knock off work and decide to have a glass of wine before bed. For me, that was about eight in the morning, when my housemates at the time were getting up to go to their nine-to-fives. The reaction from people was insane."
"For me, it seemed way weirder to sleep during the day, wake up in the late afternoon, then get dressed and go out for dinner and drinks with them, which basically meant that I was having wine for breakfast -- but from their perspective, that made perfect sense. Night work is weird."
"My stocking manager at my first job (stocking for a grocery store) didn't teach me any of the techniques or methods for efficiency (yes, there are methods and techniques to stocking shelves as quickly and efficiently as possible), so I was very slow at it for a while. Turns out he never trained me because he was too busy napping in the office during our shifts."
"He would help us unload the truck when it got in, and then disappear to his office for the next 5-6 hours while we stocked so he could sleep. Like I understand helping with the shelves isn't necessarily his job, but not training your new employee and sleeping on the job is super crappy."
"My grandfather. He acts like an a**hole then gets upset when he gets called on his bull. He's also very quick to use first amendment rights to try and cover his a**, which gets him yelled at even further. He also makes things political during family gatherings, which nets him plenty of nasty looks from both me and my mother. Unfortunately, chewing him out is the only way to shut him up. I'm sorry for complaining so much, I just really needed to get that out of my system."
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"Employers expecting loyalty from employees while provided none in return. Sorry, buddy, loyalty is a two-way street. If you can terminate my employment at a moment's notice, then I reserve the right to leave when I want to."
I knew a ton of these would be work related. As we head back from Covid it's really time to rethink and make adjustments to these situations. Also, grandpa is never changing.
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"That my employer expects me to flawlessly come into work on time every day with no excuses allowed, yet our paychecks being late are met with rationalizations and excuses from the payroll department."
"Breaks during work. Acceptable for smokers, questionable for non."
"I'm a smoker, and at my last job I smoked 3 cigarettes every day. One at ~10am, another one right after lunch, and the third at ~15. I had 30 minutes lunchbreaks, which I only used 20 of to justify the smoking. And once he said I was smoking too much, and wasted so much time, blah blah. It didn't matter anymore when I told him I'd take my full lunchbreaks from now on, without interruption."
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"It isn't the worst double standard, far from it, but it's annoying. It's about the workers who start early (and leave early) vs the workers who start late (and leave late). Let's say I start to work at the office at 6am while my coworker starts at 8am. If I leave at 2pm and he leaves at 4pm, we would have accomplished about the same amount of work. For some reason, I'd be the one who's tagged as lazy because I leave the job earlier. It didn't happen to me, but I witnessed it a few times during my career."
"When a mom can parent but a dad can only babysit."
"UGH. My kids are 9 and 11 and when they were younger (so not that long ago), my husband would take them grocery shopping or to the park or to the movies, etc. and so often he'd get "oh, how cute, you're babysitting!" He was like "Umm, no, they're my kids. I'm parenting." SMH."
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"When I was a kid if I left my toys out and one of my parents stepped on them I got yelled at and in trouble for not putting my toys away. On the other hand, when my dad left his tools out and I stepped on one I got yelled at for not watching where I was stepping."
"I had a friend that worked at a batting cage in high school. The dude that owned the place was super shady and would always pay my friend like 1-2 weeks late. One day my friend had been waiting several days for his paycheck and the owner rolls in to work in a new Lexus. My friend ended up stealing some equipment and keeping it in his car with the threat of reporting the owner if he didn't get paid that day. Lo and behold the owner came up with the money and my friend quit the next day."
"School administrations will throw a dog-and-pony show about how much they will not tolerate bullying, yet will do nothing when it is taking place within their school. The bullied kid can speak up all they want but nothing will get done without hard evidence or some other BS. What happens when he has had enough and starts hitting back?"
"Suddenly he's the aggressor and now the Principal wants to exact their Zero Tolerance Policy on that kid who justifiably defended himself. If you are a parent and are concerned for your child being a recipient of bullying, empower them to use violence to defend themselves. In some situations violence is the answer."
"Wage theft is larger than all other forms of theft combined, but is not considered a crime. If you steal $100 from the register, you will go to jail, be branded a felon and (potentially) lose your voting rights. If your boss leaves $100 out of your paycheck you can maybe recoup some portion of that after a protracted civil case at significant personal cost."
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"Person 1 yells at Person 2, then gets offended if Person 2 yells back at them."
"That people won't hire you if you don't have experience but how do you get experience if no one hires you??"
"It's a sign of an industry that is perceived to have enough workers. They know that there are experienced people available, and they don't want to train up a green employee because it costs more."
"Companies will fire you without notice but expect a 2 week notice when the employee resigns."
"Honestly I do it more as a courtesy to my colleagues so I can properly transition my ongoing projects to them. I've been fortunate enough to like my coworkers at all of my jobs and I don't want to make their lives harder for little benefit to me. It's not like the new job is going anywhere in that time."
"Young people have to respect their elders, but then said elders can say and do as they please."
"Yeah. Had this happen to me. My parents raised me to be their equal. Multiple times I'd be dating a woman with "old fashion" parents who expected me to defer to them as though I'm twelve. They didn't like me much."
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"You can carry two single-edged knives, but a single double-edged knife is automatically illegal."
"If you take maternity leave, your job/position is protected and your medical insurance still covers you. You can also use any campus facility at my previous university as you are still "considered a student" and your scholarships can be put on hold. NSERC even pays a stipend."
"Get cancer and need to take some time off? Welp, job's not held, your insurance refuses to cover you as you "aren't working". You'll also lose your scholarships and being "on a medical leave of absence" means you can't use any uni's facility without paying a premium."
"Colleges that teach ethics while ripping the students off in every way possible. I believe that ethics should still be about what is right or wrong... not what you can legally get away with."
"As a former college student, I felt this one. I feel like every college views students as walking ATMs and I went to a public college so I kind only imagine how much worse a private school would be."
Oh that dad one got me. Why can you keep your clothes on the floor but I can't? Life doesn't have to be perfect but it can certainly be a bit more fair.