Why do some employers need to treat employees like serfs? It's bad enough that we already live in a society that devalues labor, but being personally devalued feels pretty awful.
Redditor danbrownskin asked:
What's the most ridiculous rule in your place of work?
Here were some of the answers.
Wood Shop
GiphyI'm a teacher, so I have a million stupid rules I have to follow. But the worst one is that my performance evaluation is based on student improvement on the STAR literacy test. I teach wood shop.
Freaking HR
At my old job, HR held a meeting to tell us that there was too much swearing on the sales floor. Someone raised their hand and pointed out that swearing is very common in our industry and that is the way that our customers speak. HR later sent out a memo explaining that swearing should be limited to conversations with clients. It was amazing.
I'm always late
GiphyIf you are stuck in traffic on the way to work, you must email the CEO. Phone calls and texts are not permitted, only email.
Stay Hydrated
I used to work at a place in which my boss implemented a no more than 2 glasses a day water policy.
I ignored this rule and complained directly to our CEO and the matter ended later that day.
What was weird though was the majority of people actually followed the rule and some even shopped me up to HR about 'breaking the rules'.
I left not long after that because not only was my boss a bellend, but if my colleagues were going to HR over me drinking water, then I obviously couldn't trust them.
That's intense
Had a workplace time our bathroom breaks and deduct them from our allotted 15 minute breaks or lunch. We had to go see the office manager to get a key to open the restroom. As soon as we left his office he would start a timer... when you got back he would stop the timer and tell you how much time you needed to deduct from your lunch or next break. They watched our breaks like a hawk.
Also, if you made a mistake they would stand over you and time you while you fixed it and deduct that from your lunch or breaks.
You couldn't bring anything "that smells" for lunch and they had no way of heating anything up.
I worked out my contract and split.
But, the kids!
GiphyThe VP of our company just held a mass meeting to tell all of us we can't have pictures or plants or food or any form of non office supplied object on our desk. Tons of coworkers have family pictures or their kids' finger paintings pinned up on the cubicle walls. All that has to be removed. People were pissed.
Perks
My dad told me this one a while back. He used to work for a PR firm... The way he described the office environment, think "The Office" but in the 1980's.
The company hired a "Corporate Efficiency Specialist" to come in and "improve" things. She came in and implemented all kinds of rules, which seemed to follow some sort of caste system.
Her philosophy was, the higher your office rank, the more "perks" you get...
Her idea of perks:
Number of pictures you are allowed in your cubicle.
Whether you are allowed to have a potted plant or not.
Coffee mugs were only allowed to senior employees. Others had to use paper cups.
Being allowed to leave the office for lunch was also considered a "perk"
Needless to say, a coup soon followed, and she was tossed out on her hiney.
The Best 'Actually, You're Speaking To The Boss' Experience | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Dress codes
Dress code policy is just dumb at my work. Different positions have different requirements. Even though we all work in the same office.
My favorite rule though is the one on shorts. We can wear shorts on Fridays between memorial day and labor day. However the shorts can't have pockets on the side. It was written to discourage ratty cargo shorts. But the way in which it is written allows me to wear gym shorts. So I do.
Smile for the camera
GiphyNot my current job but I used to work for some crazy people.
- you had to stand in a specific area while eating so they could see you on the camera
- don't talk to customers longer than 3 minutes unless you're making a big sale, even then, keep it short
- answer the phone within 2 rings, keep the conversation to less than 30 seconds
- you can't talk to your co workers outside of work
- you can't talk to your co workers while at work, even if there was not a single customer in the store
I'm sure there's more I just can't think of right now.
Discretionary
We got a new vacation policy where you could take UNLIMITED time off. All the while he assured us that if we wanted vacation, to take it. Really! A little bit afterward, he changed it to "discretionary" time off meaning that if your boss approved it, it was ok. Then it changed to "160 hours should be the max and if you go over 200 hours then you probably don't need to work here."
At least you get popsicles
GiphyFormer job. You couldn't eat at your desk. The team managers however were pretty tolerant, on a hot day they would sometimes even hand out popsicles. The regulation people (who were especially in charge on the weekends, when no team managers were around) were very strict with this. A colleague of mine was shouted at because she ate a small pretzel, which was her breakfast.
Then again, some colleagues would casually eat a whole pizza or kebab while making a huge mess.
My desk!
GiphyPrevious job: given a tablet and a locker, had to look for a desk to sit on every morning. Stupid, caused unnecessary friction, waste of time, inefficient, and many occupied the same desk everyday anyway, they piled junks on their desk so no one else dared to sit.
Once my manager had mental breakdown, he hid in another floor away from us. It was ridiculous having to walk that far to get to him multiple times a day.
Bandaids?
For a while, we were going through a lot of bandaids and my manager was tired of buying them. So, she locked the last remaining bandaid in the safe (we had to have one; required by health inspector) and no one was allowed to use them if they cut themselves. I worked at a fast food joint where people could knick themselves on knives, tomato slicers, sharp edges, etc. If you cut yourself, you just dealt with it/openly bled. The rule changed pretty fast though when she cut herself while using a box cutter and we had no bandages in the store.
What's with the personal items?
Old work place had assigned desk location for various things like phone and stapler. You were also only allowed 2 personal items on your desk. I was written up bc I brought my own red stapler and it didn't fit in between the lines put on the desk.
Coffee is important
GiphyI wrote the ridiculous coffee-making rules for my workplace. But I had my reasons. I was a woman on the edge. The coffee was unbearable and every time it was bad I would have a parade of people through my office complaining and a deluge of emails wasting my time. So I wrote a guide, rules, if you will, on how to use the extremely simple drip coffee maker in our break room.
I emailed them to everyone, I put two copies in the break room - one of them in the cupboard where the ground coffee was kept. I went through it with people who didn't understand. Minutes of everyone's time was wasted. No improvement, endless complaints to me, more of my time wasted.
By this point I was fed up of even hearing the word coffee, the sound of the coffee maker caused me to flinch. So I ordered pre-packaged coffee grounds to take the measurement difficulty out of the equation. How can you get that wrong? I thought, naively.
On the first day of what I was sure would be the new world, a coffee nirvana, I went to the coffee machine with high expectations. The senior partner had beaten me to it, she had put four sachets of coffee into the machine and added enough water to make six cups of coffee. The first mouthful nearly killed us. I went over it again with her and returned to my office, confident that this was a one-time problem.
After lunch I went back to try and get a cup of coffee. My expectations were not so high. I witnessed another senior partner carefully opening the sachet of grounds and reach for a teaspoon. She carefully spooned out a quarter of the sachet into the machine, filled the machine with enough water for 12 cups and triumphantly threw the rest of the sachet away. I waited, we tasted it together, she was appalled. She had no idea why it was so weak. I started a new pot, slowly filling with despair as it brewed. I couldn't shake one thought: I work for a doctors surgery. These people prescribe.
I went back to my office. I ordered a giant container of respectable instant coffee and a padlock. I keep the ground coffee locked in my desk. I brew four pots a day (this takes less time than the complaints!) and on my day off they make do with instant. We have a kettle, people are welcome to bring their own filter coffee and do with it what they will. Until someone can be trusted to make a pot of coffee which is not so awful as to inspire eight people to email me multiple times a day, each one of them hitting reply-all to create a small email firestorm in my inbox, this is the way things have to be.
Scotch tape
No scotch tape. On anything. I was a teacher, and the principal wouldn't allow it in the building, threatening letters in your file for insubordination if she saw it on your desk. Only painter's tape, which by design, is meant to not stick very well. I hung posters in my room with circles of duct tape on the back side, with strips of painters tape on the front side just for show. Subtle, petty insubordination.
What if you're sleepy?
You weren't allowed to yawn if you were with a customer. Our shifts started pretty early in the morning and you can't really stop a yawn unless you do this weird teeth gritting, nose breathing thing I perfected. Because God forbid we take 3 seconds to yawn and continue helping the customer, "We must be alert and clearly awake at all times."
They're children!
GiphyI work at a small cheap childcare center. The boss/owner's (who is a complete whacko) office is next to the preschool room, which consisted of 3-5 year olds. The kids are not allowed to be within arms length from the wall because they are too loud.... this is a childcare center.... I've never been in a childcare center that's not loud.
Oh. And also, her air control is linked with the infant and toddler room, so in the summer time, when it's hot as f---, we would turn on the air for the rooms because it's obviously hot as sh*t in the rooms. Plus, we're constantly moving! But because SHE gets cold in her small office we have to turn it off. To make matters worse, our changing room is in the middle of both room, so when the air is off, and our trash is filled with poopy diapers it stinks up both rooms, and with the wet diapers it makes the rooms so musty and humid. Its f*cking disgusting. The owner complains about the smell and YET refuse to turn in the air BECAUSE SHE'S COLD. Apparently she doesn't know what a jacket or coat is, even though we are in MN.
There's no curve
We get evaluations. Either annual, when departing the work place for an extended period of time, when receiving a different manager, when promoted, and a few other reasons.
The stupid thing is, unless you've royally f---ed up, these evaluations are usually just pieces of paper that has some generic copy and paste of why said individual did such a good job doing a certain thing at a certain time. However, if you actually did excel beyond what is expected, did jobs outside of your realm and succeeded, ensured others succeeded, etc this will be annotated but may not reflect the way you think it would/should. Yeah, it'll still be positive, but it won't put you too far ahead of your peers in most cases. Why?
Because your manager (the one writing the evaluation) has to maintain a certain tempo, grading, scaling, or whatever you want to call it based on the evaluation matrix. If he grades you too high, then he establishes a high baseline which he'll have to maintain even for sh*t evaluees. If he grades too low, then excellent workers will get sh*t scores. Because if his matrix is all over the place it reflects poorly on him as a manager. So, everyone is generally evaluated the same, no matter what (this does fluctuate in certain cases).
So, essentially, your promotion is based off of time and not effort.
[deleted]
The Best 'Actually, You're Speaking To The Boss' Experience | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
There are a few experiences as frustrating as dealing with an entitled customer. But there's absolutely nothing quite like dealing with someone who doesn't r...What do you use to drink coffee then?
I worked in an office where we couldn't drink coffee from an open cup/mug.
One of my coworkers, let's call her "Rebecca," claimed to have an allergy to coffee. If she smelled coffee or saw someone holding a mug with dark liquid in it (even black tea--yes, someone did this to test her) she would start coughing and run out of the office and take a break from the smell. When she came back to the office she'd proceed to loudly blow her nose and cough for a ridiculous amount of time to show her displeasure with the coffee. She eventually went as far as reporting a coworker to HR for having the audacity to drink coffee from a mug at his desk. The coworker called her bluff and asked for a doctor's note to prove she indeed had an allergy. What do you know? They never got one.
Manager ended up buying some tumblers off of amazon and giving them to employees to use since she wouldn't have this "allergic reaction" if tumblers were used. It became part of on-boarding.
PS - We all brought in Keurig pods to share so we could have a variety to use at the Keurig machine in the break room. I stayed late one night and caught her grabbing a handful of the pods on her way out and trashing them.
Also, she once got super cranky when someone forgot about her aversion to coffee and asked her if she knew where the nearest Starbucks was. You couldn't even mention coffee around her without her getting upset. What a weirdo.
That's not how that works.
GiphyAfter much deliberation I decide to go back to work after 2 years of maternity leave (my bro died tragically, too). Legislation means your job is safe in local government for two years. Half pay for 6 months, government $ for 5. Anyway, I'm a permanent salaried full-time Museum Director for Local Government. My manager says i can come back starting at 9am instead of 8.30 but not leaving at 5.30. I need to take half an hour annual leave a day if I want to start at 9. (something the HR manager had suggested, by the way). I go, yeah, whatever, then a couple of weeks in realized, this is TOTAL sh*t and totally against their policy. Bring it up with HR - well, you need to take it up with your manager. I'm livid! I have a postgraduate degree, have been doing the job for ten years not including leave, and wha? Not trusted to work alone for 30mins at the end of the day? WTF?
Needless to say, my main concerns about returning to work were to do with this idiot power monger. Then, blessed relief, she's taking time off on LSL, her replacement asks me if I'm able to get to work on time... I'll do my best. WTF. what is the getting to work on time sh*t? who cares unless you don't make it up at the end of the day, and even more so, who cares unless the job f*cking gets done? MADNESS.
Finance bros
A little late to the party, but here goes...
I used to work in a call center for a large financial services company. They were super strict about being off the phone. Basically, if you have to use the bathroom, you better hope that it hits during one of your two 15 minute breaks or 30 minute lunch. Outside of those times, you got 8 minutes a day to be out of the phone queue (including if you had a complex customer issue). Anything over the allotted time gave them grounds to fire you for "call avoidance."
I made it work until I ended up having medical issues. And as part of my medical treatment, I had to take a medication that had diarrhea as a side effect. You can probably tell that this went over well with my employer. Ultimately, I was told that I had to have a letter from my doctor certifying that I would need extra bathroom time. So I call my doctor and (even though they thought it was weird) they faxed me a letter.
Somehow the company decided that this was an issue that required the disability accommodation department of HR's involvement. At this point I think things are getting ridiculous, but for the sake of employment, whatever. Then I get an email from HR. The email advised me that me needing extra bathroom time would require me to use intermittent FMLA. I had to have my doctor fill out FMLA paperwork. Because I needed to be able to leave my desk to take an unscheduled shit. I get the doctor to fill it out (at this point they have decided that everyone in HR has lost their minds). I send it into HR, and I figure it's all good.Nope. Not even close. After receiving the FMLA paperwork I get ANOTHER followup email with a spreadsheet attached. And I was instructed that I would have to TRACK how much time I spent in the bathroom each day and submit the spreadsheet to HR at the end of each month so it could be deducted from my FMLA time. Eventually I said enough is enough and resigned.
How?
Last place i worked... You had to complete 40 hours of job related training in order to get a passing mark for that section on your yearly job review (which impacted how much of a raise you got) but because it wasn't "mandatory" and could be completed outside of office hours (I. E. If you took a class that related to the job, read a book, go to a conference, etc and that would count) they wouldn't always give you time on the clock to complete this. Yet.... We were not supposed to do any work or access company resources (including the website that most of us used for training) when not on the clock.....
We had a mandatory training for a new ticketing system (technical support call center) that was developed by... People (this is a whole different story/complaint/general f--- up) and they scheduled us 4 hours of training time to complete this... Before it was even fully finished... They ended up with the lessons taking more than 10 hours of time to complete (per their system... Not actual real time, I might have to retake a test or read slower, etc issues)....
Several modules/lessons were added after about 50% or more of the room had already completed this training and we are getting emails from our time management lady and the woman that was in charge of the launch of this new program basically bitching at everyone for either not having the training completed (which is hard to do when things are added after you think you have it completed) or for taking too long to complete it.
Several of the lessons were auto play videos that you could not skip or jump through as their were tests at the end... And if you failed the test 5 times in a row, you had to retake the entire lesson and not just the test. Many of the questions were select multiple answers from these options, so you couldn't even do elimination for multiple choice.
So many things the changed in the almost 3 years that I was there that lead to me basically saying f--- it and end up getting fired. Call center... So metrics... My average handle time (which includes after call work) is almost 5 minutes below what it had to be... But I was on final warning because my after call work was about 15-20 seconds over what it was supposed to be. I literally have an award for customer service...but was being written up because I didn't think I needed to keep a doctor or nurse on the phone just so I could make sure my ticket was finished.
The new boss.
GiphyI worked at a small advertising agency. We had few people but were second most profitable firm in our city, having the right combination of talents.
One day the owner's wife decided she didn't want to be a dentist anymore and started taking business classes. Not one entire semester passes and she somehow convinced boss that she should work with him (and bossing us).
First day she changes the ambient radio to gospel, louder enough to hinder concentration. Then at the end of our day 5h59 asks a single mother to do a sales report that would take at least one hour. Poor kid panics. She has to go take her son at school. She says so, promises to deliver the next day and come early. Boss says "do it or you don't have to come back tomorrow". Knowing that the girl couldn't abandon her kid at school. I wanted to jump on her and punch her face.
I used to read at my lunch break (and ate at a small mall near work). Monday comes and suddenly they're making people show the content of our bags. I happen to have a book on Greek Mythology with Pan in the cover. She says that I can't enter work with that book and that I should leave it at the gate (exposed, outside, in the rain and anyone could just rob it). I call boss and say that what she's doing is highly illegal and that I didn't want to sue them but things needed to get better. Things didn't get better, I quit. Some time later a friend tells me that the agency closed. She killed it in less than a year.
We know how to boil water.
We had a health and safety inspection in our office. We had a large store cupboard with a shelf dedicated to making teas and coffees. There were 7 of us in the tea club and would take it in turns to make a brew. We were told we couldn't have a kettle in case we spilled boiling water in ourselves. We'd used a kettle for several years prior to this without incident. Instead we had to go to the drinks machine and navigate back through 3 sets if double doors carrying several hot drinks! Oh, and like many others, we weren't allowed to walk whilst talking on our mobiles. Not even in the offices. And we got told off if we didn't hold on to the hand rail whilst going up and down stairs.
Everyone else gets it!
I work in lingerie design. The computer room that I work in isn't allowed a radio and the computers aren't allowed speakers. All other rooms are allowed speakers and radios except the room I work in...
Loophole
GiphyI worked doing fundraising for an environmental group one summer in college. I forget the exact numbers, but if you met a certain $ quota each week, you got a set percentage of the money you raised. If you missed that quota by even $1, you just got minimum wage for that week. I usually didn't have a problem meeting quota, but once I had a bad week, and on Friday afternoon realized I was going to end up just under $20 short. I did some quick math, and realized that if I raised just $20 more, I would be paid a couple hundred more, so I just hit up an ATM, took out $20, and added that to my last donation. So, not exactly a terrible rule like some of these other examples, more of just a dumb loophole in their pay policy.
Change your name?
Everyone has to have a different name. If you're a new hire and someone is already using your name, even if it isn't their real name, you have to choose a new "work name". The boss's name is Allen, so when an employee named Allen came on, he had to use his middle name, Darrell. Then we hired another guy whose first name was Darrell, so he decided to go by his last name, Morgan. So the real Darrell had to use a different name even though that wasn't anyone else's actual name, because it was someone else's "work" name. No switching allowed. Now I'm just waiting for someone whose first name is "Morgan" to join up, and see where this goes next. (names have been changed to protect the innocent)
Don't move!
Once I was told to not leave the desk then got in trouble for not leaving the desk to run an errand for a customer.
We were told to forward calls about memorials to a certain department. The resident never informed us about the memorial, so when someone called to ask about the memorial I forwarded them to that department. I then got in trouble for forwarding to the department.
I got written up for telling a resident that packages had not been sorted yet because we had had fire alarms going off all day.
I literally got in trouble for doing what I was told and and then for answering a question. That was the last straw so I quit.
How do you sell then?
I work in sales.
Most insane rule is where I currently work.
We aren't allowed to give out price lists to customers.
The pricing recently changed and customers who are used to getting price lists (that's the way it has been done forever, 50+ years) are told they can't have a price list and please look it up in their computer system.
But every customer uses a different program and 75% have the wrong pricing.
Management's rationale is that they don't want the numbers in the hands of the competition. And they didn't trust anyone to not give out the lists so NO SALES REPS GOT PRICES LISTS EITHER.
I was getting phone calls asking how much something cost and I couldn't tell them because I didn't have a list. I ended up having to go through a 3rd party and sneak a copy.
After 4 months of this management acquiesced and grudgingly gave employees a list. Mostly because there were hundreds of calls coming in asking for prices and NOONE IN THE COMPANY COULD ANSWER.
Giving that price list is regarded as grounds for termination. And I have checked and the other reps are obeying the rule despite it all but eliminating their ability to sell.
I gave my notice last month - they insisted on 30 days just to be petty - and I am out of there in a week!
Hold it.
GiphyNot an "official" rule but one we still get in trouble for if we break it:
We can only use the restroom the first 15 or last 15 minutes of planning.
If you have to go during class, good luck getting someone to cover for you.
Ireland
I worked for a supermarket in Ireland in which we personally had to provide pens for the customers to use to sign their receipts or whatever at the tills. The company wouldn't even order pens which we could then buy from them at cost. We had to go, on our own time, to buy pens for customers to use.
I worked there for six years and not once did I spent a single cent on a pen.
F is for friends
GiphyMy company doesn't allow fraternizing of any kind between the different levels of employee (assistant manager to staff members, higher management to assistant management). It's to eliminate favoritism. Yet every other company in the world champions on community.
Let them know
If you yourself come as a bagger in a completely different AD, we can't have a MBA and I've been trying not to all the marketing that goes wrong is so bad one time I was told I wasn't supposed to get them to confirm that there will be arrested.
Weird
Not a rule, per se, but you get in more trouble for calling in at the time your shift starts to let them know you'll be late than you do if you just arrive late with no warning.
More dress codes
GiphyWhen I was first recruited for the company, I was told that the dress code was relatively casual - as long as what you wear covers you sufficiently and isn't ripped/old and tired you were good.
Quickly I discovered that actually, teams kinda have their own individual dress codes. If you're not dressed to the correct standards for your team you won't make 'progress' in the company. I'm not sure who actually sets these standards - I'm assuming team leaders. This produces an odd situation where I, a programming gremlin who barely leaves her desk all day - I don't even have internal meetings more than once or twice a month - have to be dressed to the nines, while others who actually see clients, partners, suppliers, et cetera, will get away with jeans and a polo shirt.
That's a power imbalance
You can not join the conversation if the people who are having the conversation are higher ranked than you. So everytime someone speaks, those who are lower ranked must shut up immediately.
SUPER IMPORTANT
I work in a restaurant where we have three ice machines. Now, in most restaurant the ice goes from the machine, into a bucket, into the soda tower or bar ice wells. But in my restaurant we have to put ice into bags, put those bags in the freezer over night, break up the ice in the morning, and then lug however many bags it takes to six different locations in the restaurant. Why, you ask? Apparently the double frozen ice makes your drink SIX DEGREES COOLER AND THAT IS SUPER IMPORTANT I GUESS.
Double standards
GiphyI work at a car dealership where the morning meeting starts at 8:30 but if you are not there by 8:25 you will get sent home for the day. Also the management team (the ones in charge of the meeting) are almost exclusively 5 minutes late to the meeting.
I work at a medium sized company in a normal office environment. I have been here for a while and am good friends with several male coworkers, one in particular who shares a similar schedule with me so we often take breaks together.
People started noticing that we would leave and return together, and started to gossip (never mind that both of us are in committed relationships and our friendship is strictly platonic). My supervisor started watching on the cameras when I would leave, and one day when I returned she pulled me into a private office where she told me that male and female co workers would no longer be allowed to ride the elevator together if there was no one else in there with them... however, she meant that I was not allowed to ride in the elevator with said co worker.
That lasted all of about a minute, after multiple people were late due to having to time elevator rides so that they were on the elevator alone with a member of the opposite sex.
Don't wear pants
Business casual dress code even when i work at home. (They Skype me to check). Reddit
It's an emergency!
GiphyOnce worked at a place where some miniboss decided that since UPS trucks don't turn left, we shouldn't either.
I don't know or care how well that worked out for UPS, but this was a damned ambulance company with a 911 contract. I will turn left if and when I need to turn left. Monkeytuesday
Samesies!
Old job of mine in a warehouse. Our stations were pretty far apart, so when we'd listen to music we'd all usually have our own stuff playing. Not a problem since you could barely hear the neighbors music. Well, the CEO didn't like hearing multiple songs when walking through the warehouse. He made a rule that we all either had to listen to the same music, or none at all. Historiun
All for a pen.
I once needed a pen. Figured this was a reasonable ask. Went to the supply closet on my floor, which was locked. Asked the floor's admin, she told me to go to the main supply room in the basement. Went to the basement and explained my situation of needing a pen. They told me all requests for supplies must be approved by my department head. Problem is, being new, I'd never met my department head. She also worked in San Francisco (I worked in Milwaukee), so I needed to send an email both introducing myself, and asking her if I had permission to get a pen from the supply closet.NicolasCage4eva
Don't skip it.
GiphyIf you had to take a leave on Monday or Friday so that you have an extended weekend of 3 days instead of 2, it was counted as 3 days leave (counting in Saturday and Sunday). Deal with that! drvinaymuc
1 min.
If you are 1 min late it is a tardy. If you take a half day nothing goes on your record. I was told to just take a half day if you are going to be late because they straight up fire you for tardies. Also if you clock out early it is a tardy. If you have to go to the doctor on lunch break and it is going to take and hour and ten min, take the rest of the day off. Weird.Whosyabobby
Firemen
Fireman... our Risk Management department decided long ago that poles were too risky for us. So we use the stairs. We have poles. Anyway, now the newest rule is no free weights....as in NO free weights to work out, stay fit. Go into burning high rise- absolutely, walk around the station carrying 40lb dumbbells... too risky. Haligan74
Represent!
GiphyWe aren't allowed to wear jackets unless they are purchased from the resort gift shop with the hotel name logo on it. They are $50+ and we don't get reimbursed, but it's the price you pay to stay warm in the cold months. PhantomTaco84
McDonald's did this to us when I worked there. They paid half, but they were still like 50-60 bucks for a crappy fleece. I just wore my regular jacket and nobody said a thing. Slizzard_73
Get that bread!
Former job: There was trouble when I (officially) moved desks and my new desk had a phone with call display. Apparently call display phones were allowed for people at a certain pay level. Your pay level also governed the height of your cubicle walls. My manager's solution was to promote me.
Another former job: We were mandated to work on a engineering related research project outside of work hours, because a responsible engineer always gives back to the engineering community. I could live with that. However, your project had to be related to the company's business. khendron
Make a list, check it three times?
We have to do all of our paperwork at least three times. There is a copy of it in our personal folders, a copy online, and a copy in our store folders. Not only does it waste time and paper, but forgetting to do one has gotten people fired. They did the other two identical pieces of paperwork confirming that yes, they did take out the trash and yes, they did check the store voicemail, but how dare they forget to do the third piece of identical paperwork. Our weekly visits from corporate revolve around whether or not we've all done this paperwork. It's so redundant. quartpint
I got 99 challenges
GiphyMy workplace doesn't let you use the word "problems." Instead, we have to say "challenges" if something is wrong. As a problem is a negative word, and challenges promotes the fact that there is room to fix said problem. throwaWaY2113232444
xoxo
GiphyFormer job at a law office: One of the partners sent an email to the entire staff that employees were not allowed to gossip in the building. What was everyone gossiping about, you ask? Oh, said partner was divorcing his wife and sleeping with one of the associate attorneys in the firm. But, you know, don't gossip. kat_rob
Toilet paper
All the extra toilet paper in the building has to stay in a single closet where it can be overseen by the toilet paper queen. I heard her shrieking the other day when she discovered someone had "hoarded" one spare roll of toilet paper upstairs so the people who work upstairs wouldn't have to walk down multiple flights of stairs when the toilet paper ran out.rhino43grr
Get well soon.
I used to work for the now long defunct books, movies, and music store Media Play. Just one of the 285 reasons that poorly run business ran into the ground was the tardy/attendance policy.
If you were literally :01 seconds late clocking in, even hours before the store opened, it was a really, really big deal. You'd not only be formally written up, but lectured like a child often times berated even. If you were tardy three times, bye-bye. HOWEVER, if you no-showed and then called 2 hours later saying you were sick?—okay, thank you, feel better.
This trained everyone to just take a sick day instead of being half a second late to work. I can't tell you how many times you'd see a coworker screeching into the parking lot before work after fighting traffic from a wreck or whatever, noticing it was 8:01, and then slowly driving off to go home and feign being sick. This was particularly upsetting when it was a pulldown stock week when we needed every hand on deck but had unusually early shifts. SSmtb
Sing Along!
GiphyMany years ago I was a vacuum cleaner salesman. There were songs about this particular brand of vacuum cleaner and how awesome it was. Every morning, we had to sing these songs as a group. In fairness, it was a pretty quality item.
It was Kirby. Didn't mean to be subversive, just didn't think anybody would care. Im_A_Boozehound
Be a good friend
When I was in the military I saw a buddy of mine sitting outside crying. I went and consoled him best as I could- apparently he was just depressed and unhappy. After he was feeling a bit better I went to go and find someone to tell them what was happening. They knew. In fact, he had been crying so much lately that they had instituted a 'no crying at your desk' policy - which is why he was outside. TypewriterKey
Vacay!
If we want to take a full 5 day week off we need to use 2 vacation days, 1 personal, and 2 more vacation days. Can never use 3 vacation days straight!?!? icecreampopncereal
Something similar here. We can't use our "sick" time until we use three vacation days. So, lets say I have no vacation hours, but get really sick, I can't use PTO.
Our sick time is essentially useless. wetonred24
Driving rules
GiphyI drive valet. The company handbook says you're never allowed to back up. Ever. You absolutely cannot do the job without reverse. It's impossible.
It's in there because of liability and our insurance policy. This way it can always be the valets fault if an accident occurs ever.
Edit: Perhaps this will answer the most repeated question... If the rule says no reverse, yet you're expected to park a car, then how can you park the car?
Answer: Never hit anything, and always reverse despite the rules. Expect to be fired should you hit anything in reverse, but probably not. The rule only exists to cover the company's butt, but if they don't feel threatened by you working there and you're an asset, you still will not be fired. And yes, many people are questioning the legality of it and you're right. It wouldn't hold up in courts, but it's in the handbook and it's silly. So I posted it. ImJustSo
The Hawaiian shirt
It's not like this any more, but for a while they attempted to have a dress code. Guys had to wear collared shirts, but "Hawaiian" style shirts were totally acceptable. You could not wear jean shorts, but jean overall shorts were ok.
I got sent home one day because my shorts weren't finger-tip length. We were tech support... no one EVER saw us, that was the best part. FuffyKitty
Witches
GiphyNo accusing other staff members of being witches. (Yeah, it happened so we had to make a rule. I run a hostel in Uganda.) Reddit
Which is exactly the kind of rule a witch would create. Blovnt
Salt Was For Guests Only And Other Weird Rules People Had In Their House Growing Up
Please read the rules upon entering....
Rules aren't always made to broken, in fact in certain households breaking the rules can have some pretty severe consequences. And when you're growing you don't ask why, you just do. Who knows how parents come or heads of house come up with some ideas, hopefully it's to keep things in order and have no malicious intent. You have to wonder though how you made it all the way to college without going nuts.
Redditor u/alfred_the_whale wanted to know what odd things were required in certain homes in life by asking.... What's the weirdest rule you had in your home growing up?
50. False Representation
Wasn't allowed to wear pants (only skirts and dresses), wasn't allowed to listen to music, was told kissing before marriage was a sin, wasn't allowed to play video games. And before you ask, we were not Christian. We were Jewish (and not Hasidic). None of this was standard at our conservative synagogue. These were just the rules my parents enforced for some reason. Neither was raised this way at all.
49. Sauceless
Not mine, my wife's in fact, but her now deceased mother wouldn't let her or her siblings have any kind of sauce. Yeah no ketchup, mayo, mustard, fish sauce, gravy etc. Turning down all the meals at friends houses that included any kind of sauce. And an explanation was never given
48. I Don't Even Know Who I Am
I wasn't allowed to have friends outside my "season." I was born in the season of Buffalo, according to some Lakota Sioux spiritual beliefs. (There's Eagle, Coyote, Buffalo and Bear.) My mother would always inquire about my friends birthdays, and if their season wasn't compatible with mine, I wasn't allowed to be friends with them. This went on until I graduated high school and moved out.
20 years later, I found out she lied my whole life about (us) being part Lakota Sioux. That part of my genetic line is actually Creole.
47. War Never Changes
I wasn't allowed to have G.I. Joe action figures.
This was weird to me because my parents allowed me to have most other 80's toys (He-Man, Transformers, Battle Beasts, M.A.S.K., etc.), which all had various weapons and whatnot to go with them. I was also allowed to have toy swords and guns, and one of those guns was realistic enough to have gotten me in trouble at school when I brought it as part of my Terminator costume. But no G.I. Joes.
I think I asked why once, because I was allowed to watch the cartoon and DID ask for them. I think my mom's response was "I don't want you having them because they promote war."
46. Slang Ban
We weren't allowed to use the phrase "spin out" or any variation of it. This was the number one slang expression for our city in the mid-late 80s and we used it constantly. My mother banned it because "it doesn't mean anything". I remember being outraged by this great injustice, but now I have a 12 year old in my house saying "yeet" and "skrt skrt" constantly and I see where my mother was coming from.
We also weren't allowed to eat Kentucky Fried chicken because apparently it was made from diseased chickens with the diseased parts cut off. Couldn't go to birthday parties there or anything. I still feel weird and guilty if I have KFC. MacDonald's, Pizza Hut etc were fine though so it wasn't a tactic to try to turn us off fast food.
45. It's For Show
In our house growing up we weren't allowed to eat something that my mum had just bought from the shops, there was an unspecified cooling off time where you weren't allowed to touch it. If you did, she would say "I've just bought that, you can't eat it!"
Only now typing that out do I realise that's pretty weird.
44. Wicked Stepcarpet
Step mom wouldn't allow my brother and I to go into the living room no matter what because that's where the "nice carpeting" was. Her kids were allowed to go into the living room, just not my brother and I because "we were older and dirtier so we would easily stain the carpet". Only took our Dad two years to convince her to let us in the living room, under supervision.
That rule then changed to my brother and I not being able to sit on the leather couch because we would put holes in the leather by sitting on it. What made this rule hilarious to me is that the big screen TV they had was that kind of projector big screen TV where you had to be eye level with the screen to see anything otherwise you couldn't see anything. If my brother and I wanted to watch the "Family Night" movie, we had two options. We could either stand in the living room and watch it, or sit on the dinning room chairs IN THE DINNING ROOM because the chairs would ruin the carpet if they were in the living room.
43. Ahead Of Schedule
My mom demanded all clocks had to be set ahead by fifteen minutes in our household. So if a clock showed 12:15, the real time would be 12:00.
I have never understood the reason for that, but we got some weird looks from guests because of it.
42. Euphemistic Life And Death
I wasn't allowed to say I died in a video game. I had to say I "lost a turn," instead.
I remember being baffled by the idea that Mario could literally drown in front of my eyes, but I wasn't allowed to say what obviously just happened.
41. A Swear Jar, But Crueler
My mom had something she called the Saturday Box. If we ever left our stuff out in the common areas, she would confiscate it and put it in the Box, where it had to stay until Saturday. When Saturday finally rolled around, we had to pay to get each item out.
40. And The Word Is "No"
A few. Was not allowed to eat between meals. My sister and I were not allowed to take naps. Parents could though.
Also no breakfast foods for lunch or dinner unless it was a night my mom made pancakes for dinner. Which I couldn't eat. I was made too and then would not be able to leave the bathroom the whole night.
Trust me when I got to college I LOVED eating cereal at 10pm. I used to sneak in the pantry and eat in the dark but you cant sneak a bowl of cereal.
My kids will definitely not have these rules.
39. Peace ALL The Way Out
When I was eight years old and went to visit my dad and stepmother during summer break, I had to be out of the house before my stepmother woke up and was not allowed to return until after lunch on the days my dad worked. I would instead leave all day, so be gone from 8:00 until 5:00 when I knew my dad would be home.
38. Emotions Like Mariah
Forbidden to make any noise whatsoever or show any emotion. If we asked to listen to a different radio station in the car -- threat of violence. If we asked to roll down a window while two adults chainsmoked in the car -- threat of violence. If we voiced an opinion about what to watch on the family's one TV set -- threat of violence. Opinion on what's for supper? Threat of violence.
I learned to never speak or give any opinions, ever. The only way to avoid being screamed at and struck was to behave as if I didn't exist. Adult life has been rather unsuccessful as a result. Sorry. Guess I needed to get that off my chest.
It wasn't all bad. There were two exceptions to the above, Xmas and birthday. The parents must have known they couldn't totally oppress children on those days.
What my parents got for making it clear they didn't want a son, was to lose the son. I was about 22 when I realized I didn't have to spend any time with them. It has been a long time since they've heard from me. I found out my mom died by doing a routine google search and finding her obituary. My reaction ... wait for it ... no reaction, as taught.
37. This Is what We Call A Phobia, Kids
Couldn't leave the house until mom made sure everything was powered off. Literally checking anything with a power cord or wall socket. & most of the appliances & sockets hadn't been used in years, yet she still had to check. Usually took us 30 minutes to leave because of it.
36. Sometimes Rules Need Conditions
My mom saw some TV psychologist talk about limiting children's screen time, so for about 6 months I was not allowed to use a TV, game boy, computer, or anything electronic between the hours of 3 and 8 on weekdays. I was about 11 or 12 at the time
She gave up on this eventually because this made me have to stay up until 1 am to get my work done because I needed the computer to work.
35. Cherish This
There were a few movies that we were only allowed to watch once per year. We watched them at Christmas time, and would get in trouble if we watched them at any other time of year. They weren't even Christmas movies (example, one was The Wizard Of Oz), my dad just didn't want us to get sick of them, so they had to stay "special."
34. Sing A Song Of Sixpence
No singing at the dinner table was our big one. My sister and I would never stop singing, we thought that was a rule everyone had at their house until pretty late in our childhoods.
33. But I Have A Home
My mom wouldn't let me wear anything camouflage. I asked her why and she said it was "too aggressive". She also wouldn't let me wear anything with even a slight stain on it, because she said it made me look homeless.
32. Late Dinner And A Movie
No TV. This was the '80s. We finally got a terrible, tiny black and white TV when i was maybe, 12 ish. The only thing I could watch without ruthless mocking was the original Star Trek if there happened to be reruns. I can recite them by heart to this day. I was sooooo pop culture illiterate, it was unreal. I had no idea what Saturday Night Live was, or MTV or anything.
In retrospect I think my dad just hated everything and especially loud noises. I did learn to love reading tho.
Oh, and also dinner was between 10 PM to midnight. I was a night owl also, from babyhood, so this wasn't the worst thing for me but I do remember being woken up to come eat many times. My father just preferred it that way so that's how it was.
31. LARPed Myself Into A Hole
1. My parents listened to a guy in Sunday school who told them about the evils of D&D and all RPG's. They came home and made us get rid of Might and Magic: Secret of the Inner Sanctum. They actually bought us another game to replace it. This was around 1988 and the guy actually told them about LARPing destroying his life.
2. We had to answer the phone with our last name followed by residence. Pretend our last name was Mahaloth. We picked up the phone "Mahaloth Residence".
30. Always In The Dark
No lights. My mother suffered from migraines and couldn't tolerate light so the house was shrouded in darkness. We used candles and kerosene lanterns.
Now I literally turn on every single light in my house every morning just to get my day started. I still crave light after all this time. It hurts me not to have it.
29. Morbid Caution
In order to go anywhere overnight, rather it be a sleepover, or camping trip. I had to have my mother's name, address, and phone number written in permanent marker on my back.... in case my body showed up somewhere.
28. You...All.....
I wasn't allowed to say "y'all". I was living in Arkansas, but my mom didn't want us to sound southern (I wasn't born in Arkansas and neither were my parents). She also thought it would make my sister and I sound uneducated.
We ended up living in Arkansas for 9 years and Texas for 5 years. My sister and I don't have a southern accent, but we do say "y'all" quite often now.
27. Car Mode: Elite
We all had to meticulously record in a ledger every penny spent on our family cars: gas, oil changes (which we did ourselves), alignments, etc. Each ledger was kept in the glove box. Each entry had to include the date, the mileage, price per gallon (gas) or price per quart (oil) or some other description of what was being purchased, total cost, and a few other things I'm sure I've forgotten.
This was super embarrassing if I had to get gas with HS or college friends in my car. I was teased about it. However, I always assumed my Dad had some impressive spreadsheet with which he was tracking...something. Years later, after I bought my own car, I asked my Dad what he did with all of that data, he said, "Not much, really. Occasionally, I'd look to see what kind of gas mileage the cars were getting." 🤦🏻♂️
26. Practice In The Shed
My dad insisted I take up a musical instrument when they were first offered in 4th grade, but then demanded that I never practice at home until I got better because he didn't want to hear bad music.
25. Good For Very Very Bad
Every last Friday of the month my mom would make us stay home from school and play video games as a family. Didn't matter what was happening at school, test or whatnot, it was a rule and a tradition. She'd watch us play Sega or Nintendo games and make us these extravagant lunches. As a kid I always thought it was awesome and I look back on those days fondly.
Unfortunately it was for a darker reason. My dad was overly strict and pretty abusive, although I love the man unconditionally, he was also abusive to my mom and very controlling. Thing was he had a good job and was off on the weekends, and us kids obviously were at school all week. My mom made the rule so that she could spend a day with us, having fun and being together without my dad there instigating a massive fight or beating us kids because there were vacuum lines on the carpet. It was the only real time my mom got to spend alone without my dad there, aside from summer vacations. I didn't realize it at the time but to this day I don't think we missed a single last Friday, she would have never allowed it.
24. Awww...But Wishbone!
My mom didn't let me watch Wishbone because in one episode she walked in and they were burning a witch and she didn't want me to watch a terribly violent and disgusting show while I was so young.
23. Spiritual Tones
Not allowed to whistle at night. Was told that you'd hear one back from someone who isn't there.
Clarification: My mother is Native American, so we have a few superstitions like that. House isn't haunted. Parents aren't schizo. Just mild superstition.
22. Nom Nom Nom
We were told to bite hands and arms at the dinner table if the person reached past or over your plate for something instead of asking for it to be passed to them. But...GET YOUR ELBOWS OFF THE TABLE!!
21. It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown
My mom had me believing the Great Pumpkin existed and I could only pick 10 candies and the rest had to be given to the Great Pumpkin. In reality, the Great Pumpkin was my dad's cubicle.
20. Keep it bland....
Salt was for guests only. The actual use of spices was very very looked down on and seen as a huge insult to my mom and dad even though they were absolutely horrid cooks. Ticliff
19. Every other dog....
My dad made up a rule to stop my big brother from asking about getting a dog every ten seconds. We had neighbors on both sides who had dogs, so the rule was that only every other house could have a dog. My brother believed it for a long time. TwinLinds
18. Stand Erect!
I couldn't recline or lay my body down AT ALL if my boyfriend was over. My mom thought that me laying down would give them "thoughts" so I couldn't do it. Once I put my feet up on the couch while my FIANCÉ was over and my mom got pissed and thought I was trying to turn him on.
I also changed into sweatpants from jeans once because I was going to watch a movie with my boyfriend and she thought I changed to give him "better access." I was just uncomfortable in jeans.
Also, no sailor moon, avatar, fairly odd parents, Harry Potter, anything with magic or witchcraft. Also never celebrated Halloween and never trick or treated. OverallDisaster
17. Only Unsweet Tea....
I wasn't allowed to put sugar in my tea because my mum told me that when you go to prison they don't let you have sugar, so it will makes prison that much harder.
- Thanks for having so much faith in me mum.
- I'm pretty sure you are allowed sugar for your tea in prison. Griff-Man17
16. Lightning Crashes....
My grandmother said not to poop during a lightning storm because a bolt of lightning might strike the pipe and electrocute me. pavlovs_bog
15. Eating Buns.
My dad had diverticulosis (pockets in the intestine) and couldn't eat sesame seeds (among other things). When we would eat fast food sandwiches, everyone had to give their bottom buns to Dad, in exchange for his top buns. So all my life I grew up eating burgers with 2 top, seeded buns.
This was never explained, and it was from before I born, so it was literally when I was in college that I realized that it wasn't normal. I thought it was just Dad-Privilege TM to have 2 bottom buns. LtheDutch
14. Pizza What?
At my friend's house they had a "no pizza-balling" rule.
There were 3 teenage brothers and when they ordered pizzas (at least a couple larges), tempers flared quickly when people would try to grab as many slices as they could.
The first rule in place was that you couldn't have more than one slice at a time, and you could grab another once you had the last bite in your mouth. But one of the brothers quickly figured it out that if you ball up a slice he could fit it in his mouth and grab another one. Hence, no pizza-balling. tokyokish
13. But it's MY $$$!!
I could only buy things if I was buying them for a birthday or Christmas gift for somebody else. Mind you, this was my own money I earned from my job. My mom knew how long it took to get home from school, so if I stopped at the store, she knew and I'd be in trouble. melindseyme
12. Hush. I'm watching my stories!
Bedtime was 7pm until I was in my teens. I didn't realize other kids had much later bedtime until I was a teenager. I think it was mostly because my mum's favorite soapy comes on at 7pm. We were noisy kids. Daddyssillypuppy
My bedtime was 8pm until I was a senior in high school. Most nights went something like this:
"Goodnight son"
"Dad, it's only 8pm"
"I didn't ask what time it was. Go to bed" jfox73
11. Hmmm.....
No pooping or peeing within the hours of 2:00 to 4:00 am, not sure if they had a reason, but it was always so random. They just always told me not too. ColesFinsta
10. So Severe....
My parents acted like referring to them as "he" or "she" while they were in the room was the equivalent of saying "f**k you." So referring to my parents with pronouns was effectively not allowed. gentrifiedavocado
9. Life Lessons....
No violent video games unless they were about history. therealmacter
I talked my mother into incorporating Age of Empires into my homeschool history class because it was "educational." Korncakes
8. Use the Side....
We were not allowed to use the front door. Ever. There was a metal screen on it with a deadbolt that needed a key for either side... my step dad kept the key and even visitors had to go to the back through the side gate.
Edit: My step dad told us only cops use the front door. Anyone who came to the front was automatically suspect to him. We were too NEVER answer the door to strangers for this reason. All of our friends/visitors were to go through the back. Alices-Nightmares
7. Sing Out Louise....
No singing at the dinner table. This rule was frequently broken. Our parents thought it detracted from meaningful conversation and family bonding time, but I think it ended up actually enhancing my relationships with my siblings. lightlySaltedGuy
6. Feed Me....
I should never ask what's for lunch/ dinner. Elviikk
That's actually quite funny, whenever my parents asked me what I wanted for dinner I would always say food. They stopped asking me what I wanted to eat when I said it in front of some guests, which made it seem like they didn't feed me. Squady97
5. Finding Comfort.
Wasn't me but my neighbor. When my dad would would come home from work my friend would have to go home. His parents told him that because that meant it was dinnertime and therefore he should come home. Him being a child, didn't grasp that portion of the rule, he only understood come home when my dad gets home. This translated in my friend being terrified of my father. If he saw my dad turning into the driveway, he would drop whatever we we're doing and sprint home. If my dad would make it home and get out of the car, he would cry and run home. Somehow in his head, my father was bad.
It took some time before my friend was comfortable around my father. Not_all_aware
4. Stay Out!
My father woke up at anywhere between 10 and 12 every day. Immediately upon waking, he would stumble to the bathroom, where he would spend 45 to 75 minutes coughing mucus out of his lungs and spitting it into the sink. He had advanced emphysema because of his decades-long smoking habit. During this time, no one was to talk to him, look at him, or interact with him in any way beyond bringing him crappy instant coffee.
I learned this lesson the hard way the first week after my mother married him, because I had to pee, so I opened the door and was immediately confronted with a 38 year-old 400 lb man in nothing but his underwear, red-faced and screaming at me to get the hell out of the bathroom. Ourobius
3. Knock... Knock...
"Don't lock the bathroom door!"
... "why not?"
"Because you don't need to!"
... "Lady, I need my privacy." DEPRESSED_RAINBOW
2. Just 1!
We were only allowed 1 towel a week. We could do whatever we wanted with it, but we didn't get another until next week. Reddit
This was a test. You were supposed to weaponize your towel and take your siblings towels, becoming the towel god. How do you live with being such a disappointment? KJBenson
1. Stay Humble.
We weren't allowed to say "I am the best" or "I am the greatest!" My dad grew up in a competitive household. SomeCrazyGarbage
I went to private Christian school and some kids told me they got in trouble at home if they said something was awesome. "Only God is awesome," they'd be told. Mahaloth