I'm not perfect with words.
But I do love them.
That's why I get frustrated when people destroy them.
All it takes is one letter to ruin everything.
If I find I'm pronouncing something wrong, I look up the correct way.
Why can't everyone else do that as well?
Redditor schnozzberryflopwanted to compile a list of pronunciations we need to sharpen up on.
"What's a mispronunciation that sends you into fits of rage?"
Don't axe me anything. Ask me.
Correct evading
genie talking GIFGiphy"'Eluding to’ something. That’s alluding meaning referring to something indirectly. Eluding means evading something."
7oakskent
"I once made this typo, and someone commented 'it seems the correct form of 'allude" eludes you.' :D "
Memorphous
The Classic
"Ugh... affect/effect I just have a hard time ignoring. Like my brain will read the one they wrote but in a sarcastic/condescending tone."
CumulativeHazard
"Actually, legitimate question for you: when should one use "affect" and when should they instead use 'effect?'"
"I've never been able to find a hard and fast rule, and have been using it like; 'affect'; when something causes something (example: "you are affected by the sleep spell"), and effect when referring to the effects of something (ex: 'the sleep spell has an effect in a 30 ft sphere'). Is this anywhere near correct or am I way off?"
hahasnake
For once in my life...
"My co-worker keeps saying 'Ask-rix' instead of 'asterisk.' It drives me insane."
MLaw2008
I just found out and I’m, like old, that I’ve been saying it wrong 'asterick' my whole life. I want to punch myself in the face. Hopefully the next 40 years go better."
"I had a former coworker correct me when I said asterisk. She was very confident that it was asterix. For once in my life, I didn't rub it in endlessly."
JustMakinStuff
What a Year!
"I had a boss once who would always call it a 'physical year.' It took me longer than I care to admit to realize that she actually meant 'fiscal year.' It’s amazing how much more sense my job made after that lol."
Then_Jury_1336
"Had to scroll way too far for this. I have worked in finance and people still say Physical Year.. which is just mind-boggling to me. Fiscal and physical are two different things."
Flimsy-Animator756
"I've always thought a physical year in accounting/book keeping to mean Jan-Dec and fiscal year is the time between the company closing their books."
SmellyTofu
???
No Way Smh GIFGiphy"I try not to get worked up about mispronunciations, but I had a manager who said 'per batim' instead of verbatim, and I winced every time she said it."
AngkorLolWat
It's like nobody went to school.
Letters Matter
Insanity Going Crazy GIFGiphy"My boyfriend doesn’t pronounce the first r in 'frustrated.' He sounds like a child and it’s… well, frustrating."
crazycatguy23
"My husband (and his family) does this. Makes me insane."
becktacular_b
The Mix Up
"Not a pronunciation but I see people switch 'sale' and 'sell' in social media all the time and it boggles my mind they don't know the difference."
Jfonzy
"I’ve seen so many people mix up woman and women online that I can’t figure out if they don’t know that one is singular and one is plural or if it’s autocorrect for some reason. I’ve seen it so many times that I really don’t think people know the difference and it bothers me so much."
SleepyCakeInsomniac
just get a taco...
"My mom cannot pronounce chipotle. She says 'chip-ol-tee.'"
absurdbrain
"My Dad does the same thing! He also says 'kay-suh-dill-uh' no matter how many times I correct him."
VoidWalker4Lyfe
"When the town I grew up in finally got a Chipotle, nearly everyone pronounced it 'Chi-pol-tay' and it made me stabby."
scootypuffjr2
"My bf says... 'Kway-so' instead of queso. Makes me wanna go kwazy and kwill him."
Adorable-Ring8074
In Hotels
"I work in a hotel. The number of people that refer to adjoining rooms (meaning to have the connecting door between them) as 'ca-joined' (not conjoined which is still wrong but still less wrong) makes me want to rage punch them. Call them adjoining. Call them connecting. Call them adjacent even. But ca-joined is not a go**amn word."
heyderhoneydew
I'll have Tea
"When people say eXspecially instead of eSpecially."
throwwaywaywayyaway
"EXpecially if they order eXpresso at the coffee shop."
GeeZeusCries
"My Dad says expresso. Very smart, very educated, very good grammar, loves coffee. Still says expresso."
algo-rhyth-mo
"Had to scroll too far for this one, it’s the worst."
zuniceratops
"Someone I work with does this with so many basic words that she says almost daily, including exspecially. She also always says physical when she means fiscal. Oh, and she says supposably instead of supposedly."
thehelldoesthatmean
Be Sure
the narrator GIFGiphy"They never get insure/ensure right either."
TimidPocketLlama
"Like nails on a chalkboard."
wazoof01
Did we all pay attention? Sound it out!
Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below!
As with any language, English has a wide variety of dialects.
Pronunciations in one region—even within a single country—can vary.
But then there are those creative pronunciations that are just wrong—no matter the region or country.
Redditor nichtwarum asked:
"Which word have you proudly mispronounced for the longest time?"
Like Water?
"My husband pronounces condescending as 'condensending' and it drives me crazy."
"I've told him how it's pronounced a couple of times, but he still keeps saying it."
"I feel like I'm being condescending if I keep correcting him..."
- truryufhvcgdtre
Oh myyy...
"Armadildo."
- Back2Bach
"Armored dildo."
- blamethepunx
"I pronounce it this way the first time just to make the person question what I said. Then I say 'armadillo, what did you think I said?'."
"The follow up has yet to not be extremely satisfying. I hold those precious moments of embarrassed confusion and kinky realization in memory for when I really need a laugh."
- Fallacy_Spotted
Saucy
"Worcestershire."
"This word is physically painful attempting to say."
- Microscopiccheese
"I heard someone call it 'wash your sister' sauce, and I haven’t attempted any other pronunciation since."
- BoofingPalcohol
Chickens?
"Military coup."
"Pronounced it as 'coop' several times during a national debate competition, then got corrected in the middle of the debate by the judge."
"Opposing team laughed at me lol, but we still won."
- Substantial-Chef-198
GiphyDon't get us started on gif.
"Meme, pronouncing it me-me."
- batangtaft
"Had a manager who called any gif or anything sent to the group chat a 'me-me'."
"Loved him, best boss I’ve ever had, and I didn’t have it in me to correct him."
- geoffissiffoeg
Just say weiner dog.
"Dachshund."
"Always thought it was dash-hound until college. Not sure how I missed that lesson in german class."
- sonicaxura
"We had Dachshunds (Jake and Elwood). All the time, people would come up and say 'oh I love dash-hounds' and we would 'yes Dax-unds are great'."
"We would go back and forth discussing dash-hounds and dax-unds as if both sides were not pronouncing it differently."
- stuck_in_traffic
GiphyWeek...
"I used to say the phrase 'Play it by year' but in reality it was 'Play it by ear' which makes a lot more sense."
- Garden_of_Pillows
No, Vyvyan.
"For years, my family has pronounced those things you use to look at far-off objects as 'binoc-a-lears'."
"That's all very well as a family joke, but when you actually say the word out in public by mistake, it's excruciating."
"It has to be said in a whiney voice as per Ade Edmondson in The Young Ones, when he wants to know why he can't use some 'real binoc-a-lears'."
- Rsoles
GiphyAnd potpourri?
"Sachet, I always said it satch-it."
"Even now I feel like I'm just saying sashay and the world is trying to trick me."
- Pale-Procedure895
Rhymes with Pampers.
"For my whole life I thought diaper had an M in it, diamper."
"I still call it a diamper."
"Side note, was playing a party steam game you play with your phones and I realized I'd been wrong forever when my answer 'diamper' got made fun of horrendously..."
- feistiestmango
GiphyApt error
"It took me way too long to realize it’s Alzheimer’s and not Old Timers."
- feistiestmango
Hooked on phonics
"Horse doovers [for hors d'oeuvres]. Yes I am an animal."
- txarbuilder
"I'm only slightly more sophisticated than you, I knew it was fancy and called them oars-du-vores."
- zandyman
GiphyActually...
"I pronounced 'quinoa' as 'kin-oh-ah' for the longest time...in public."
- atltop5150
"If it makes you feel any better, in South America, where quinoa mostly comes from, we pronounce it like you used to!"
"The emphasis is on the O, as in ki-nO-ah."
- whiskercheeks
GiphyHere's the T
"Often. I didn't know you should actually pronounce the 't'."
"I said offen for an awfully long time, well I was taught that way, I still mispronounce it very often."
- raemi134
Zapped
"Champagne. In honour of Zapp Brannigan."
- TomCBC
"Good old sham-pag-nee."
- That_Cosmic_Chealien
"I started doing this with guacamole for the same reason, but have done it so often that I forget to un-butcher it when not with my friends…"
"I have embarrassed myself a couple times at restaurants haha."
- El_Frencho
GiphyHorrifying
"Macabre."
"I pronounced it ‘mah-cuh-bee’ forever like an idiot."
"I thought it was one of two ways to pronounce it, depending on the sentence. I was wrong."
- snarlyelder
A bit of mischief
"I used to say 'mischievious' instead of 'mischievous' (misCHivəs)."
- kikiiie
"The incorrect pronunciation of that one is so common that it’s almost become an acceptable alternate pronunciation, in my opinion."
- ToBeReadOutLoud
Chop, chop
"I don’t know but when I was a kid, 'helicopters' were 'hopter-copters'."
- ApollosOwl
"I called them 'helichopters'."
- yoiliketopramen
upside down spinning GIFGiphyIsn't it ironic?
"Ironically 'mispronunciation'."
"I used to say 'mis-pro-NOUN-ciation'."
- AerobaticDiamond
So, do you or someone you know have any words you proudly mispronounce?
Share them in the comments.
People Share The Funniest Mispronunciations They've Ever Heard Of Truly Simple Words
This is about to go far, far beyond M-E-L-K. But feel free to really simmer on that one. Infuriating. If I've alienated all those that do jam the "e" in there, no apology.
These moments of mispronunciation rifle past us every day. They're tiny moments of fury that we're forced to swallow. The alternative would be correcting someone. And that, friends, sounds like far more confrontation than anyone is in the mood for. What's more, it's a short road from correcting to being known as the pretentious jerk face correcting people's speech. There's no way out, really.
Luckily, these moments occupy about 2.6 seconds in a given day. But you're about to give a few solid minutes to a rapid fire list of them. Stay calm.
u/NishantRockstar911 asked, "What are the most ridiculous pronunciations you've heard for the most simplest of words?"What are the most ridiculous pronunciations you've heard for the most simplest of words?"
Sidenote: very enjoyable to read all these Reddit users' DIY approach to a pronunciation key.
It's Latin, You Wouldn't Get It
I know a guy who used to pronounce "Homo sapiens" as "Homo s-penis" with absolute confidence.
I'll Have the Gnocchi With No Chins, Please
My friend insists on pronouncing gnocchi as "no-chin". Not sarcastically, he's said it at restaurants even.
NOT AN OCEAN
Pacific for Specific. Makes me crazy! It's a completely different word
No You're Just Making Up Rules Outta Nowhere
Supposably instead of supposedly... like, where did you even get the b from?
GiphyFood for Thought
I don't understand how any of you can pronounce crayon like cran while still pronouncing crayola like crayola
It drives me crazy
This One Makes My Blood Boil
Instead of saying Monday like everyone else, my sister pronounces it Mun-dee. It's stupid because Sunday she pronounces correctly.