People Break Down Their Funniest 'Sir, This Is A Wendy's' Experiences
Reddit user deadmoby5 asked: 'What was your "Sir, this is a Wendy's" moment?'
Most of us have heard the "Sir, This is a a Wendy's" phrase, said in those moments when someone has said something totally inappropriate given the setting they are in.
And while some of these literally take place in a Wendy's or similar fast-food chain restaurants, these awkward moments can happen... pretty much anywhere.
Redditor deadmoby5 asked:
"What was your, 'Sir, this is a Wendy's,' moment?"
...Actually, This Is a McDonald's.
"I was working at McDonald’s and this lady said, 'Can I get the Wendy’s four-for-four?!'"
"I said, 'Ma’am, this is a McDonald’s.'"
"Without a moment's hesitation, she replied, 'Indeed it is, can I get a Big Mac?'"
- lukemercerrr
Someone Separated from Reality
"I had a guy come into my place of work yesterday p**sed off because he missed his payment date and had to pay extra to turn his phone back on."
"He said something along the lines of, 'It was due at midnight, and y’all aren’t open at midnight, so how was I supposed to pay?'"
"I calmly explained that we are open until 7:00 PM every day except Sunday."
"He screamed, 'Well, unlike you, I actually have a job!'"
"At my job."
"Whilst doing my job."
- lordgabe92again
An Office Mix-Up
"I work for a CPA office that is in an office park with a couple of doctors' offices."
"One day, a guy came in only speaking Spanish, so I grabbed my Spanish-speaking colleague to translate. He talked to the guy in the lobby for a few minutes, and then the guy left, and my coworker came back and asked if that was a joke or if we put someone up to that."
"Apparently, the guy explained that his testicles were extremely swollen and painful, and he was looking for one of the doctors' offices and just walked into the first building in the complex."
"I'll never forget, he said, '...I’m like, sir, we do taxes here, not testicles.'"
- AlternativeAcademia
A Health Advocate
"I worked in a cell phone store that had a veterans support office behind us."
"One day, an older gentleman was waiting in the queue. When it was his turn, I called him up and asked what I could help him with."
"He stepped up to the counter and told me that the veteran's hospital was claiming his vision impairment was only 20% disability, and he felt it was much higher."
"I agreed, and I offered to walk him to the correct building, and told him I would be a witness for him, lol (laughing out loud)."
- fridaycat
The Deck of Entitlement
"I was in Lowes one morning right after they opened. There was a woman at the service desk having a complete meltdown down, yelling and screaming because Lowes didn't have a licensed contractor there at the store for her to hire."
"She apparently woke up that morning and decided she needed a deck, like, that same day, and thought she could just go to Lowes and have someone immediately start building a deck."
"It was dead so I stood with the cashier listening to the show. They ended up having to call the police to get her to leave."
- DasGoat
The Coca-Cola Theorist
"I've told this story tons of times to my friends and family because it's one of my favorite Domino's Stories. This happened somewhere around 2017-2018."
"One day, it was really slow at work at Domino's. I was still a relatively new Insider (only a few months into what would be about four years) and still in school, so I was hoping that it would stay slow so I could go home early, so I could cheat on my math homework, play some League of Legends, and get some sleep since my school started an hour earlier than other schools in the area."
"A woman, probably mid-40s, came in to order a pizza. She was pretty chill, and we were just chatting while she was ordering because there really wasn't much to do otherwise since we already cleaned the store and oven and all that."
"After she got her pizza all done up, I asked her if she would like any drinks."
"She was like, 'Oh, what do you guys have?'"
"I was running down the drink options and she noticed Coca-Cola and looked at me wide-eyed like she just saw someone get hit by a car."
"She said, 'DON'T YOU KNOW THEY PUT HUMAN EMBRYOS IN COKE?!'"
"...I'm sorry??'"
"She then spent the next SEVEN. MINUTES. Running down pretty much every major conspiracy, from human embryos in Coca-Cola to Flat Earth to the moon landing being faked, etc. If you think of a pre-pandemic conspiracy, she hit it."
"I was stunned. The only words that could come out of my mouth were, '...So no on the drink, then?'"
"She said brightly, 'Coke Zero, please.'"
"I guess the Zero means 'Zero Embryos.'"
- noblemile
Work That Connection
"I work in radio, and got a call on the contest line one time."
"'Yeah, I need a hotel room,' said the caller."
"'OK. How would you like me to help you?'"
"They said, 'Well... book me one!'"
"'You're aware you called a radio station's contest line, right?'"
"'Yeah. Don't you book hotel rooms for rock stars when they do a show in town? Book me one!'"
- originalchaosinabox
I Believe the Store You're Looking For is... Sephora.
"Not one specific moment, since it happened all the time when I worked at Ulta."
"She said, 'I'm looking for this lipstick,' and showed me a Sephora brand lipstick."
"I said, 'We don't sell that, but I can show you something similar!'"
"She was indignant. 'No, I want this specific lipstick, don't you sell it?! Well, where can I buy it?!'"
"I deadpanned, 'At Sephora, ma'am.'"
- Sunshine030209
A Misdirected Call
"I worked in a local cafe/newsstand/convenience store type spot. We also had a Ticketmaster outlet for a bit. Our small town had an annual concert that usually ran two or three nights. It was really popular with the local folks, so it brought in a lot of foot traffic with people buying tickets (my boss was honestly a small-business mastermind)."
"That was the extent of our involvement: we sold and printed gate passes."
"On night one of the event, I was closing the store as usual, at 10:00 PM."
"An irate woman called, wanting to 'file a noise complaint' about the concert."
"I was like, 'Ma’am, you must have the wrong number, this is a local cafe.'"
"She INSISTED that she was filing 'an official noise complaint' and demanded to speak to the owner RIGHT NOW."
"I said, 'At 10:00 PM on a Friday? Yeah, he’s not here.'"
"He also isn’t the police and doesn’t deal with noise complaints. Also, it’s only 10:00 PM, and this concert has been widely advertised for months."
"She then went on a wild rant that we needed to do… something?… about the noise, since we sold tickets. She wouldn’t let me off the call and was going berserk."
"I told her I was going to disconnect since we had nothing to do with the event or the noise."
"She called back multiple times, and finally I just let the phone ring… It was still ringing when we locked up. Like, MA’AM, ARE YOU OKAY?"
- Swimming-trifle-899
In Search of the Mystical Dairy King
"I worked at Dairy Queen about ten years ago, and a customer pulled up to our very busy drive-thru."
"Customer: 'Yeah, can I have the 10 nuggets for $1.49?'"
"Me: 'I’m sorry, sir, we don’t carry nuggets, but I can get you a chicken strip basket?'"
"Customer: 'No, I want nuggets! On your commercial! You don’t even know your own food?!'"
"Me: 'Sir, I’m sorry but we don’t carry nuggets. We have chicken strips and steak fingers?'"
"Customer: 'NUGGETS FOR $1.49!'"
"Me: 'Sir, this is Dairy Queen, you are referring to Burger King.'"
"Customer: 'Dairy King?!'"
"Me: 'You are at Dairy Queen, asking for a Burger King menu item.'"
"Customer: 'Oh. (proceeds to wait in line for another five minutes while I watch)"
- avianeyb
Deer in Headlights
"I worked at Wendy's throughout high school and some lady ordered a burger meal at the drive-thru. Over an hour later, she comes back to the front counter, slamming the burger on it, saying it was cold."
"I checked our receipts and told her she ordered over an hour ago and that burgers aren't meant to stay hot for that long."
"She said that was absolutely unacceptable and how dare we serve her a burger that gets cold."
"She then proceeded to ask me for my full name and details so she could sue me, at the same time freaking out when I didn't have a pen to give her to write down my info."
"Another customer walking by said, 'Holy s**t, lady, relax,' and she yelled at him to mind his business."
"He said, 'Well, I just feel bad for this poor employee you're yelling at. If you don't wanna eat here, go somewhere else.'"
"Bless his soul, I was only 17 and was so shocked."
- hayleexh
Not a Medical Professional
"I work as a cashier at a home goods store. I’m very friendly and honestly treasure my customer interactions."
"I was doing my usual patter, like, 'Hi there, how’re you doing, did you find everything all right?' and this lady tells me that it’s the first time she’s been out of the house in a while."
"I thanked her for choosing our store and went to move on with the transaction. She raised her shirt, showed me a HUGE angry red incision on her stomach, and started telling me about her recent hysterectomy. The stitches hadn’t even been removed yet."
"I sort of nodded and smiled and tried to pivot to her total so I could move on with the MASSIVE line that’s building, and she wouldn’t stop talking."
"I had to call for a back-up cashier while getting a very detailed description of surgery, uterine cancer, and the recovery process. She didn’t drop her shirt the entire time."
- souryoungthing
Depending on the Pet Supply Department
"I used to work for Kmart. Someone came into the store and wanted to know where the pet department was located. We only had one aisle of pet items and it was mostly items for dogs/cats (food, litter, toys, etc)."
"I took the customer to the aisle, and they said, 'This is it? This is all you have for pet supplies? You don’t have an actual department like other stores?'"
"'Yes sir, we just carry the basics. If you need a bigger selection, there is a Pet Supplies Plus located at the other end of the plaza.'"
"The customer got upset and said, 'But if I wanted to go to Pet Supplies Plus, I would have gone there. But I wanted to go to Kmart. So I’m guessing you don’t have fish food or anything like that?'"
"I showed him the same selection of fish food, and he got upset. He then started asking advice for fish tanks and again, I directed him to the Pet Supplies Plus that was located just a couple storefronts down from Kmart. When he insisted on not going to that store, I gave him directions to 2 other pet stores in the area."
"Eventually he left, but not before saying, 'This is why Kmart is going out of business!'"
"Sure buddy, the lack of a pet department is the sole reason Kmart is going out of business."
- DannyC990
...Oops.
"Found the product I needed online. I drove to the store and spent 20 minutes failing to find said product on the aisle it was supposed to be on."
"I showed the picture to multiple staff, none of whom recognized it."
"I finally went to the customer services desk and after 10 minutes of waiting in line got told the website I was looking at was one of their competitors."
- SarcasmWedding
Uno Reverse Card
"I went to the drive-thru at a Wendy’s and the person taking the order said, 'Welcome to Walmart.'"
"I was really confused and I heard laughing and he said, 'I’m so sorry,' he works there too and was on autopilot."
- SpecificLook7215
"You missed the opportunity for the uno reverse card. Imagine saying, 'Sir, this is a Wendy’s,' as the CUSTOMER."
- Avenntus
"A few months ago, I drove up to the Wendy's drive-through and heard through the speaker: 'Welcome to McDonald's, can I take your order?' (There was laughing in the background)."
"I did reply in a serious tone, 'Sir, this is a Wendy's!'"
"Cue uproarious laughter by all... I think they were stoned."
"10/10. Always going to that Wendy's."
- codeprimate
From hilarious to jaw-dropping to utterly shocking, it's fascinating to see how awkward things can get when someone does something completely inappropriate for a setting. At least in most of these cases, they made for funny and memorable stories.
People Divulge The Most Embarrassing Thing They've Ever Done In Front Of Their Crush
We've all done some embarrassing things, some that are so embarrassing, they actually keep us up at night.
But the worst kind of embarrassment has to be the kind that happens in front of a crush. While you're already worrying about whether or not they like you, and you're hoping to impress them, you somehow manage to do the exact opposite.
Redditor nei7jc asked:
"What is the most embarrassing thing you did in front of your crush?"
Quite the Turn of Events
"I crashed my motorcycle in front of her and her new boyfriend… She came with me to the hospital. I won."
- Randomhero360
Word Choice
"We were at a writers' conference. I spent a good long time telling them about some controversy surrounding the use of pseudonyms in a writing contest. I was pretty proud of how well I stated both sides, as well as my fairly well-researched thoughts on the matter. They didn’t add much, but I could tell they were interested."
"About fifteen minutes later, I realized that every (single) time I’d meant to say 'pseudonym,' I’d said 'surname' instead. Never talked to them again. Thirty years ago and it still hurts."
- Preposterous_punk
Second-Hand Embarrassment
"I had a credit card declined..."
- Keithninety
The Accidental Text
"I accidentally sent her a message about her which was supposed to go to my best friend."
"Thanks to my stupidity, she is now my girlfriend."
- Ninjagator
Drowning in Love
"I almost drowned in five feet of water. We're getting married this year, lol (laughing out loud)."
"It was an accident due to my friend's landlord not taking care of the property properly. It was an above-ground pool. I was lightly leaning on the railing."
"I was trying to do my best 'I'm just a chill, normal dude who is definitely not super nervous in front of this very attractive person' pose. Then the railing snapped, and I fell backward, hit my head on the wooden part of the pool as I fell according to others. The railing didn't fully detach and my ankle got caught in the bars. I was hanging upside down, head and torso completely submerged."
"My beautiful, wonderful, strong fiancé jumped in, lifted me out, and got all the inhaled water out (luckily wasn't a whole lot). She literally saved my life. I luckily only sustained a mild concussion and sprained ankle, in exchange for an amazing human being I get to call my love for the rest of my life."
- Gaymerlad
Awkward First Kisses
"I went in for a kiss, missed the mouth, and kissed his jacket collar. Panicked, laughed, stuttered an incomprehensible 'sorry,' laughed again, and ran away as if I was chased by a f**king velociraptor."
"I was 14 back then, meaning that it basically happened in the stone age, so we're cool."
- Leocut78
FriYaY
"Throwing my fist in the air and weakly saying, 'Yay,' when a dude told me, 'At least it’s Friday.'"
- ddensity9009
All Too Real
"I went on a run and bike ride with him in the morning (one after the other), knowing d**n well I don’t have the stamina for either."
- zy-raii
Financial Preparations
"I was in high school and asked this girl out on a date. She said, 'How about Friday we go out to dinner and a movie?'"
"In the most embarrassing thing ever I said, 'How about we just go to a movie? I don’t think I can get my dad to give me that much money.'"
"She actually did go out with me, we ended up doing dinner and a movie, and she dated me for four years into college. I can’t imagine why. I told her how embarrassing that conversation was years later and she said she thought it was funny I asked her out but didn’t have any money."
- SweetCosmicPope
"Purr" of the Moment
"We were hanging out in my room when I got up, closed the window, and grabbed my cat to put him outside."
"My trousers were kinda loose when out of the blue, they fell down to my ankles, and my first reaction was to cover my crotch area with my cat. I still cringe at the thought of it."
- Kiro7676
Those Dance Moves
"Well, when I was in kindergarten, I liked this girl, and In my tiny kid brain, I thought that doing front flips and back flips was very cool. I thought that was peak human ability."
"So I thought I would impress her with my very own flipping skills. Which I did not possess. So I improvised. I thought it was just as cool to sit on the ground and roll backwards. Over and over."
"Fast forward some time and my school used to have a kindergarten dance for kids who passed. Parents were invited. Your kid couldn't go unless you were present."
"I thought, 'A school dance huh? Looks like my time to shine.'"
"Now imagine you're at a kindergarten dance. You're there to watch over your kid. And then out of nowhere, you see this other kid in a tiny suit rolling across the ground like a f**king 'Dark Souls' character."
"Safe to say I stayed single for a very long time."
"That is my first memory. I want to die."
- Jokesonyouiwannadie
Very Smooth
"I was new to driving and wanted to impress him by parking right next to him in the student lot. He watched as I struggled to find where the f**king headlight switch was for the d**n thing."
"And I proceeded to turn on the windshield wipers in search of the lights."
"This went on for agonizing minutes, and I drove away mortified."
- perpetualworries
Gorgeous, Gorgeous Coworkers
"There was this guy at work, in a different department, who I saw maybe once every two weeks. He was beautiful. So beautiful that every brain cell in my head fled the moment I saw his glorious face."
"He was very polite and friendly too, so when he would walk past, he would smile and say hi. One time he did that, I spilled a whole can of red bull over myself trying to say hi back and doing an awkward wave."
"Another time I was about to go back inside when the hi came, and I was so dazzled by the smile that I forgot that doors need to be opened and smacked face first into it. That godd**n smile."
- asharkonamountaintop
Something About Pottery
"This is so dumb, but we were at a pottery shop painting pottery and talking about books."
"He asked me what I liked so much about romance novels and I said, 'For me, it's the LONGING. Wanting what you can't have, fighting yourself and the world to get it anyway. That's the stuff.'"
"There was nothing bad about what I said but I was so embarrassed to have shared that particular tidbit. We've been together for a year and a half now, he's everything I ever longed for."
- Suitable_Ad_6911
Double Oops
"Hit her square on the head with a tennis ball by accident. She had to go see the nurse."
"Another girl I had a crush on in high school. I sat next to her and could feel that I needed to fart, so I held it in. Bad move. It came out as a prolonged squeak, and she turned her head and stared at me, disgustedly."
- GrandPerspective5848
We've all had some embarrassing moments in our lives, especially around people we have crushes on or would otherwise like to impress.
But at least for some of these Redditors, they were able to turn their embarrassing stories into happily-ever-after tales.
We've all known someone who tends to say mean things or generally be kind of a jerk.
And whether we want to admit to it or not, it can be fun to see that jerk taken down a few notches with a solid insult.
Ready for roasting, Redditor depressed_jellybear asked:
"What's the best insult you've ever heard?"
Not Your Mom
"When I was in high school, one of my classmates gave our teacher a typical 'your mom' response to a question without realizing the teacher’s mother had just died."
"Without missing a beat, the teacher said, 'Leave my mother out of this. I don’t make fun of your parents, and look what they produced.”
- HopeDeferred
Adoption Jokes Not Welcome
"I was playing 'Pavlov' (a virtual reality game) with a group of people, one of which was this very annoying kid who kept saying something like, 'You're bad because you're adopted,' and stuff like that."
"He did that to one dude, and the guy replies something like, 'I'd return the insult, but that'd imply someone wanted you.'"
"Had the whole lobby erupting. I don't know if it's taken from somewhere or what."
- ClaireBear13492
Underestimated by the Teacher
"Teacher of mine once said to a classmate who kept making the most asinine contributions to the conversation:"
"'You make it really difficult to underestimate you.'"
"The guy had no idea what it meant, he thought it was a compliment."
- robbycakes
Jeez, Dad.
"16-year-old me trying to convince my dad to take my friends and I to see 'American Pie':"
"Dad: So what is it about?"
"Me: A group of high school friends trying to lose their virginity."
"Dad: I can stay home and see that."
- Theromented1
Based on Real Life
"I once asked my cousin if he watched the tv show 'Desperate Housewives,' and he said, 'No, I’m married to one."
- InourbwotamI
The Joke Will Go On
"I remember when 'Titanic' came out. My grandma, my mom, and I were getting ready to see it."
"My grandpa said, 'Don’t know what the fuss is about. I can tell you what happens, the boat sinks. The end.'"
"Lol (laughing out loud). Maybe it was his delivery, but it cracked me up."
- a7xbarbie
So, Anyway...
"The best one I've heard was, ''I bet your parents change the subject when their friends ask about you.'"
- scottcree486
Seems Pretty Complicated
"I overheard someone tell someone else, They’d need a recipe for making ice cubes."
- thepiecesaremoving
An Insult for an Insult
“You’re not the dumbest person I’ve ever met, but you better hope he doesn’t die.”
- Trick-Reveal-463
"And I have the best response for that: 'Well then, I will pray for your health.'"
- Maria_506
New Take on the Clown Car
"I saw a bunch of quite pretentious people getting out of a limo at a club and pretending they’re more than they are to get in ahead of the line."
"The bouncer quipped, 'I can always tell clowns, all arriving in the same car.'"
- preferablyoutside
Signs of Aging
"Some bouncers are brilliantly witty, I assume it comes with working in a job where you have to deal with drunk a**holes all the time."
"A few years ago, I got IDed to enter a bar. I'd recently started buzzing my hair due to hair loss, yet my photo driving license had me with a thick full head of hair from several years before."
"The bouncer looked at the card, then me, and then said, 'Haven't you forgotten something?'"
"I was confused. He then showed his colleague, who nodded and said, 'Yeah mate, you've definitely forgotten something.'"
"Then he pointed to his head."
- Squeaky_Lobster
Good Luck Getting a Job
"You've got a face for radio, and a voice for writing."
- mike_e_mcgee
Girl Quips
"From 'Golden Girls':"
"Blanche: Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go take a long, hot, steamy bath, with just enough water to barely cover my perky bosoms."
"Sofia: You're only gonna sit in an inch of water?"
- LissaMasterofCoin
Randomness Wins
"Context aside, someone once told me I look like I go to the park to punch birds."
- TheRoamingWeeb
While it can feel terrible to need to be around negative people sometimes, there's hope knowing that there are some things we can say that are funny and that will relatively put them in their place.
Now if only some of us could think of the comeback at the moment when it's useful...
Teachers Share The Most Inappropriate Comments Students Made That They Secretly Found Hilarious
Contrary to popular belief, one of the top difficulties for parents and teachers alike is to not laugh at inappropriate moments.
Sometimes kids say things in hilariously wrong or sassy ways, and it can be so hard to not burst out laughing.
But when they say or do something that's also inappropriate, it's important to teach them the lesson now and have a laugh later.
Looking for a good laugh, Redditor Grouchy_Factor asked:
"Teachers of Reddit: What was an inappropriate comment or behavior you had to discipline a student for, yet you secretly thought was hilarious?"
Young Sailors
"I teach kindergarten. One of my sweetest little girls, coming inside from recess, smiled and said, 'Man, it’s f**king cold outside!'"
"I asked her to repeat herself, and sure enough, I heard her correctly. It was hard not to laugh!"
- Square-Set7031
Breaking the Fourth Wall
"A friend of my parents was acting in a University play as Poseidon, who was evil and had various dastardly monologues throughout detailing his nefarious mind."
"Anyway, a group of school kids sat in the front row in the audience, all about nine years old."
"In the middle of a particularly intense and malicious speech, one of them stood up and shouted, 'F**k off, Poseidon, you’re a w*nker!'"
- Spiritual_Review_754
Road Rage
"My daughter, the cutest little blonde-haired thing, around three years old at that stage, was in her car seat behind me en route to the crèche when someone cut me off."
"I didn’t shout but I just leaned on the horn for what seemed like forever."
"When I finally let off the horn and sat back in my seat, this concerned little voice from behind me asked, 'Daddy, is that guy a [c-word]?'"
- icallshenannigans
Inappropriate Presentation
"9th-grade student did a report on Whaling. The rubric required images on every slide and, to get their points, students needed to explain their images. Thinking that I wouldn’t notice, he decided to use images of Sperm Whale penises. A new photo on every slide of large pink whale penises breaching the ocean waves from all angles."
"I asked him to explain his images. He said, 'Well, that’s where you get the sperm.' With a very straight face, I asked him to come in at lunch. With grave seriousness, I explained that, now that he had exposed 30+ kids to whale penises, we would need to let his parents know."
"So, he called his mom and, voice cracking he said, 'Mom… I put a whale penis on my slides,' and started to cry. His mom talked to him about making good choices and how this might affect how others perceive him."
"But, later, when his mom chaperoned a field trip, we laughed and laughed. She made him tell his dad later that night and once they were alone, his parents laughed until they cried. I shared the presentation with my boss, and we thought it was so funny."
"How brave!! How stupid!! This is the most famous story in my group of friends, and I love getting to tell it at gatherings."
- esowmmm
Hating Vegetables
"A kindergartener shoved her hand into the spinach at the salad line in lunch, held it up, and shouted, 'Leafs is for sheep!' before throwing it in the ground in disgust."
"I had to walk away while another teacher scolded her for wasting food because I couldn't keep a straight face."
- sonomamayana
The Butt of the Joke
"Elementary PE class was getting lined up to leave the gym. The biggest kid in my class bent over and of course, had half of his butt crack pop up the back of his pants."
"The smallest kid in class with his high-pitched voice proceeded to yell, 'Release the Kraken!'"
" I was getting ready to get on him when the big kid started to lose his mind laughing. Once he started, the rest of the class and myself started. The big kid was an awesome young man and said he thought it was hilarious."
- manofsteele3297
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
"After telling a kid he needed to buckle down and get work done, he point-blank told me that if I just sit there on my a** all day, he can sit on his a** and not do work too."
"Ballsy move, kid. It didn't pay off as I sent him downstairs, but I still chuckle about it."
- Deezypeezy
Big Negotiator
"I handed a detention slip to one of my ninth-grade students, and he tried begging his way out of it. He eventually said, 'Who do I have to kill or sleep with to get out of this?'"
"He was not aware that the administrator in charge of discipline had quietly entered the room immediately prior to this. (This was the hilarious part.)"
"I later related this event to the middle school football coach, without naming the student. He replied, 'That sounds like something [actual name of student] would do.'"
- EvilSnack
Main Character Energy
"I once had a kid with ADHD, regularly late, really late."
"One time he turned up and I said, 'John, you're late again. It's nearly 11 o'clock.'"
"He replied, 'What's the problem, you're open all day!?'"
- R0gu3tr4d3r
Danny DeVito
"Kid printed 1000 copies of Danny Devito photoshopped into a chip and labeled 'Danny Dorito' and taped copies of it everywhere."
- Riot55
Inappropriately Funny
"I teach seven- and eight-year-olds at the minute. At lunchtime I overheard Child A say to Child B that they can't eat something because they have a nut allergy."
"Then Child C came in with the comment, 'But are you allergic to THESE NUTS?' as he cupped his pants."
"I had to call him out, of course, but I was laughing on the inside! As the child was in tears for getting in trouble."
- NostalgicDreaming
'Your Mom' Jokester
"I was teaching a Southern Indian immigrant kid with a strong accent. Kids were riffing 'yo momma' jokes about him."
"The kid got everyone's attention and then dropped, 'I, too, would make fun of your mother, excepting that cows are sacred in my culture.'"
- thereprbate
Funny Because It's True
"My wife is a teacher and had to tell off a group of her kids for consistently calling another kid Karen (not her name)."
"Problem is, the kid in question is definitely a Karen and my wife secretly thinks it's hilarious."
- toomunchkin
Literally
"My wife, a middle school teacher, once told a kid to walk over and flip off the light switch so the class could see the overhead projector easier."
"So... he walked over and gave the switch the bird."
- Tactically_Fat
For the Love of Science
"We were doing some very basic fermentation experiments in high school, the one where you add in different amounts of yeast, warm water, and sugar in flasks and you place a balloon over the top to see which one expands the most (aka produces the most carbon dioxide)."
"Anyways, one of the groups overdid it and their balloon exploded sending a gooey yeast mess all over the four group members."
"One of the kids stands up, removes his goggles, and shouts, 'I f**king love science!' at the top of his lungs."
"This happened to be during an observation. The admin was also trying to suppress her laughter."
- chaparrita_brava
Though there were teachable moments sprinkled throughout these stories, it's more heartening to imagine these teachers having something to laugh about at the end of their long work days.
The Funniest Times People Got Confused Between Items In Different Hands
As humans, we are far from perfect, and sometimes, the mistakes we make are utterly hilarious, if not also embarrassing.
The worst part is how unexplainable some of our mistakes tend to be, especially when we're holding multiple items in our hands and manage to mix them up.
Redditor DanielMichels decided it would be fun to collect stories of these mix-ups:
"What is the worst thing you have done because you got confused between items in different hands?"
Just Go With It
"I grabbed my banana instead of the conductor's baton on the music stand as I began conducting the orchestra and chorus during a rehearsal."
"The musicians followed the banana very well as if it were intentional on my part (some thought the curve aided in making the performance more expressive)."
- Back2Bach
"This was my brother, but I was on the receiving end. We were at a country club for a wedding one evening and there were various backgammon games set up. This happened so long ago that I don’t even remember how to play backgammon anymore."
"But it was my brother's turn and he was excited. So excited he slammed his glass of bourbon down on the game board and thrust the dice cup full of dice into his mouth."
"It was totally worth being covered in watered-down liquor to witness such buffoonery."
- theWildBore
A Beautiful Creation Until...
"I drank paint water and whilst washing my brush in my cup of tea."
"Two simultaneous f**kups."
- ScoutManDan
"I was drinking red wine and painting with a container of red paint the same size as the glass. I DRANK THE PAINT!"
- NikkiSnippets
The Things That Have Been Thrown Away
"I threw my keys into the recycle bin and attempted to start my truck with a crushed Monster can."
- DevilWitcher128
"My husband cleans the cat litterbox and puts the gleanings in a tied-off plastic grocery bag. He also puts his lunch in a tied-off plastic grocery bag."
"When he goes to work he takes both bags outside, one to come with him and one for the trash can. Mistakes have happened."
- AoiRenga
"I cracked an egg, poured out the egg into the trash, and put the shell into a bowl."
- BanjoBroseph
"A friend of mine once put the remote control in the oven and then wondered why he found himself in the living room holding a sausage."
"The remote control was destroyed. And it had previously spent several days in the back of a freezer because of a similar incident."
- ledow
"A couple of minutes ago, I unwrapped a stick of gum, stuck the wrapper in my mouth, and threw the gum in the trash."
- StylishSundae
Hilarious Mental Glitches
"I once picked up my toothbrush and then instead of picking up toothpaste, I picked up a tube of cortisone. I luckily caught myself. I also once picked up a razor instead of a toothbrush and just stared at it."
"Another time I poured water on the floor instead of in the sink. Just imagine someone standing facing away from the sink, angling their glass of water downwards and just staring at the stream of water hitting the floor."
"My mom has done the same but poured the glass of water into a dog cage my cat was chilling in. Cat didn't move but stared at her like, 'What the f**k?'"
- FavouriteParasite
"Lol (laughing out loud), I was writing and eating French fries and took a bite out of my pen."
- inglorious_tardbas
"When I was 10, I was watching TV and had the remote in one hand and a cup of hot tea in the other."
"My dad came in and asked for the remote. Instead of tossing him the remote, I threw my cup of tea, and it when all over him."
"The next morning his chest and legs were red."
- Firewolf_anna
So Many Coffee Woes
"I had a cup of coffee and a little single-serve container of coffee cream. I opened the cream container, poured its contents into the trash, and then dropped the empty container into my coffee."
"What?"
- CalgaryAlly
"Before-coffee fugue is a real problem. The other day I tore open a packet of sweetener and almost poured it into the trash. Then I took the milk out of the fridge, got coffee in the mug successfully, and went to put milk in the fridge without pouring any."
"I realized and then opened it and almost poured milk into the bottom shelves of the fridge."
- SusanCalvinsRBF
Always Check the Fridge
"Why is it that so much stuff ends up in the fridge? My boyfriend starts there when I'm looking for something. I've placed toothpaste, empty milk jugs, keys, and way more in there."
- ElfjieTinkerbell
"The fridge is my default place to look for missing items. I put my baby’s powdered milk in the fridge by accident I couldn’t find it anywhere and my cousin had to fetch me some more so I could feed the baby. I found it the next morning when I was making myself a coffee. I also find the tv remote in there too sometimes."
- B***h_Is_Taken
Some of these were gross or painfully hilarious, and some were just funny.
Either way, it's a reminder that we're all human, we all make silly mistakes, and it's totally okay to laugh at ourselves sometimes.
Has this ever happened to you? Let us know in the comment below!