I thought about being a delivery driver once.
Then I remembered the heinous pranks my friends and I would play on the pizza guys.
Shameful!
Also, after years of watching Dateline NBC, I'm not walking alone up to or into strangers' homes.
I can only imagine what some of these brave people walk away with burned on their psyche.
Redditor iicebath wanted to hear about all the crazy things delivery people have witnessed, so they asked:
"Delivery drivers of Reddit, what are some standout moments?"
Reminder: please tip generously because you never know what your delivery folks have been through that night.
Spark it Up
Chris Tucker Smoking GIFGiphy"A guy offered me weed. After I refused he insisted on giving me something, so he went opened a package of nutter butters. I grabbed a handful. They were good."
Tech_Enthusiast49376
WEEERRKKKK!!!
"Walked into a giant skyscraper in central London to deliver a parcel for a guy named Thomas, at the reception I'm told he will be in his office, so I walk in and find him dancing by himself in the corner with no music or AirPods or anything, he's facing the corner just doing the Carlton, so he had no idea I was just standing and watching."
"I leave the room and just try to reevaluate what I just witnessed, when I walk back in he is standing behind a table acting like nothing just happened. So I hand him my parcel and he just thanks me and signs for it. I have never got a delivery from Thomas to this day."
jamessaleh190e
Corpses
"I used to collect biohazards from doctors' offices, hospitals, and other places. I think people that work in funeral homes like to mess with the living. I saw way too many dead, naked bodies at that job. Did that job for 6 years and then went back to slinging office supplies. I have not seen a dead body since."
unhalfbricklayer
blah blah blah...
"I used to deliver Appliances for a major home improvement store. I'm at the end of my shift and standing at the back of the truck finishing up my paperwork in a... not great part of town. Suddenly I hear someone walking up behind me and turn to see three young men approaching my truck."
"My initial instinct is to just be, 'take what you want, blah blah blah,' but as soon as I'm about to go into my prepared statement the guy asks if I have any leftover boxes because they have to help his aunt move the next day. So I got rid of all my cardboard in one shot and had one less thing to worry about when I got back to the warehouse."
plucky13
Just Chill
Chill Leopard GIFGiphy"Delivered food to a guy on Friday afternoon. He answered the door in his hi-viz vest and tighty whities. I've never seen a man more chill with himself than that dude."
Thrownawaybyall
People really have no shame sometimes.
Not a Drop
Happy New Year GIFGiphy"I left the drinks on the roof of my car and made it to a stop light two turns away. A guy behind me got out of his car and handed me the drinks through the window and I was so shocked that nothing spilled I couldn't even thank him. I just exclaimed 'Omg how did they not spill!' and he ran back to his car."
unseenwreckage
'Oh, you're here!'
"Pre cell phone and gps days (1979), I was delivering carpets to an unfamiliar town. We got high to start the trip, lost the directions, but knew the address. We were so lost. We drove until we saw some people in a yard, and stopped to ask directions. Before we said anything, they said 'Oh, you're here!' We somehow found the right house. We dropped off the carpets, no complaints the next day. It must have been the right place."
eightfingeredtypist
Keep the Carvel
"Did Doordash for some extra cash on the weekends about 3 years ago. Had a Carvel order going to a funeral home. In my head I was thinking it was definitely a funeral where some kid was so upset that they ordered ice cream to calm them down and cheer them up. I arrive to the funeral home and it's empty."
"I knock on the front door and a few seconds later a dude answers in nothing but his boxers. Behind him another dude was looking at himself in the mirror that was hanging on the wall. That dude was also in nothing but his boxers. Weird sh*t to be happening inside of a funeral home."
F_a_username
Deliveroo
"I'll never forget when I worked for Deliveroo arriving at the customers door, lifting up the big bag of food to hand it to them, and the entire bottom of the bag fell out, leaving their whole order spilled across their door step. I remember their face of pure shock so vividly. I offered to help clean it, of course, but they refused, I think they just wanted me outta there, haha."
MacyTmcterry
Preparation & Dessert
Licking Ice Cream GIFGiphy"Still my favorite delivery. On a Saturday night, they ordered a pint of gourmet ice cream and a box of condoms."
fd1Jeff
There is so much to learn about people from their deliveries... and I am SHOOK!
When I was in college, I worked as a server at a restaurant. I hated the job, and so did every single one of my co-workers. We all assumed there is no worse job than being a server. We were wrong.
According to Reddit, there is a job that’s worse: being a food delivery driver.
That’s because when you’re delivering the food, the people who ordered have the home court advantage.
The delivery drivers of Reddit all had unforgettable experiences at certain houses. Some were funny, some were creepy, and some were just too strange for words.
Curious to find out more, Redditor HotHamWaterBath asked:
“Current and former pizza delivery folks, what’s “that house” you’ll never forget delivering to?”
Stay At The Scene Of The Crime
"The one where the dude held me up at gunpoint. Delivered to a house in a sketchy area..dude opened the storm door a crack, just enough for me to see the gun. Ran my pockets (we carried all our tickets and the cash until the end of shift. Manager would just total the tickets and we keep the difference). Went through my car, took my iPod, some change, a couple of other small things, and left."
"This idiot had me deliver to his actual address. When I got back and told my boss what happened, the police came through, gave them the address where it happened and he was there. Incredibly f*cking dumb"
– cpt_buttcheeks
Now That's A Tip!
"I delivered to this house of kids, only kids, like 15, 10 year olds."
"Clearly borrowed moms credit card, they were all acting like I was the police and they were waiting to see if I was going to arrest them all."
"The main kid eyed me suspiciously when trying to put in the tip, he ended up writing in $100 as a tip"
"I asked him if he was sure and he took it back and wrote $1,000"
"I told the manager and he didn’t enter the tip as assuredly this had been a mistake on an $11 pizza."
"I just remember watching all these kids celebrate successfully ordering pizza as I turned to leave."
– BrockSampsonite
Not About To Stick Around
"Delivered to a house on a dead-end street in a bad part of town around 10pm. Windows were covered in cut out pictures of dolls and horror movie villains. Poorly lit. Walked up to the front door and saw a sign that said “Smile, you’re on camera!”. A tv monitor showing live footage from several rooms in the house as well as the front door could easily be seen through the window. I ended up throwing the food on the ground and ringing the doorbell and running as fast as I could, I was so freaked out."
– 1-800-eatmyshorts
The Wording Matters
"Ho boy, I got one. I have Lupus, and at the time I had a pretty gnarly butterfly rash break out on different parts of my face. I walked up to this guy's house and went through the usual spiel, but as I'm giving him his order he looks at me funny. No big deal, this happens all the time so I'm used to it. Then he asks what's wrong with me, I tell him it's a butterfly rash, he asks what causes it, so I told him it was lupus. He says he never heard of that before, and naive lil ol me, thinking it's an educational moment to spread awareness, tells him that it's an autoimmune disease, what it does to the body, etc. I'll never forget the way his face changed from curiosity to disgust. And then he says "So it's like AIDS?". I say not exactly, they have some similarities but they're not the same. But of course he didn't listen, he backed away and said that it was disgusting and that I shouldn't be working with food because I could contaminate it. And then he slams the door. I learned that day that saying "autoimmune disorder" instead of "autoimmune disease" gets you way more positive reactions and more people willing to listen instead of immediately reacting with fear and disgust."
– LaRosaDeFlores
Should've Hidden It
"I delivered to this one kid who left his bong on the table when he answered the door, and like I don’t care but he freaked out so much that I saw it that I will always remember it."
– DrFishbulbEsq
Story After Story
"Delivered to this one trailer, had like 4 steps up to the door. I can still knock on the door without going up the steps. Now when they open the door, my face is at shin level, you know, below the knees. When they open the door, I get hit in the face by the weed smoke that ROLLS out. Remember, I'm at shin level, think about that. Then there's another time, I'm delivering to an apartment and as I knock they shout to come in. Open the door, dude is banging his girl right there on the couch, he looks over and says money is on the table. NEVER stops. That's just two instances, lol, I have a LOT more."
– lmshaw1975
Just Wanted The Company
"One regular was the police department civilian dispatcher who ordered the 3 piece special on Friday nights. I had to get buzzed in through the back door, and walk past holding cells to get to the radio room."
"Sometimes there were detainees in the cells sometimes not but when there were, they usually said, “Hey, where’s mine?” or “Smells good” but the ‘town drunk’ was locked up in there each and every Friday night."
"After a while, the dispatcher would also order for the drunk. She paid for her order, and then paid for his order from his confiscated wallet."
"This went on for months. Then the drunk started paying me from the wallet in his pocket, his cell door was open and was was sober. The dispatcher was just letting him in every Friday to eat with her and talk."
– Deleted User
Super Awkward
"Had to deliver a pizza to a nudist who kept bending over. Offered him a permanent discount if he just picked it up."
– Blind-bigfoot
How Demeaning!
"Delivered a pizza to a upper middle class neighborhood. A high school kid opens the door to pay me with a giant jar of coins. I hear laughter and look up to see his friends filming the exchange from the second story of the house with a video camera. The kids parents are also behind him laughing as they watch this “hilarious” prank being filmed on a broke 19 year old pizza guy. At this point I feel humiliated. Take the jar of coins and leave. At close my manager had to count out the coins and turns out the kid shorted me like $13. F**k you kid"
– g0thcowboy69420
Yeah, waitressing was definitely not this bad! That's why I always tip my delivery drivers well.
Do you have delivery horror stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Delivery Drivers Reveal What They Want Their Customers To Know This Winter
Delivery drivers have a long and often arduous job––and we have the power to make things a little easier for them.
When Redditor hannahclipse asked the online community "What do delivery drivers want everyone to know?" the responses proved invaluable.
"It's the one by the street."
Delivered for Grubhub during summers.
There are people who live in massive apartment complexes that just don't know how to articulate WHERE THE F**K THEIR BUILDING IS.
"It's the one by the street". All of them are by the street.
'Go in the parking lot and you'll see it". There are 3 different parking lots, each with their own unnumbered buildings.
"It's the lot with the black Camry".
"In most cases we deliver..."
In most cases we deliver to whoever calls first. Yes I know you only ordered desserts and yes I know you're only about 5-7 mins away but there is still 4 other people I have to deliver to before you.
Also people who are consistently mean/rude to me are my lowest priority deliveries especially when it's busy.
"I understand that..."
- Shovel your driveway
- If the shipper required the signature, signing the note won't work. You gotta be there in person, or go pick it up.
- I understand that you're supposed to be getting two items, but I only have one box. Maybe it was delayed, or maybe it's coming from a different delivery company, or maybe they put both items in a single box.
- USPS is not the same thing as UPS.
...which is ridiculous IMO."
Answer your phone even if it's a strange number. Delivery drivers aren't always going to have a number with the same area code as you. Also, we work for tips and delivery charges are not a replacement for that (they go to the store, not the driver). We pay for our own gas and car repairs and aren't required to be paid minimum wage (which is ridiculous IMO).
"If you are going to tip..."
If you are going to tip the delivery person, do it direct, NOT thru the app. Some apps take the tip into account and it's taken out of their pay, so if the delivery is supposed to pay $10 and you tip $5, the company takes $5 off the pay and the driver never sees your tip.
Not all work this way, DoorDash does.
The jury is still out, but these gig jobs don't seem to pay that well.
"Don't assume you're my only delivery."
GiphyDon't assume you're my only delivery.
When I was a driver in college for a Japanese restaurant I would have people be like, "I don't understand why you took so long, the restaurant is only 5 minutes away." and then get stiffed on a tip. Aside from the time it takes for the food to be made you also have to realize that drivers sometimes go out with more than one order, some that were put in before yours, which can cause it to take longer than you expect.
I also had one lady that forgot to add extra sauce to the order and was like, "Can't you just go and pick it up really quick?" No, I can't, I have two other deliveries and it's not my fault you forgot to ask for extra sauce and in this case I knew for a fact she forgot because I was the one on the other end of the phone that took her order.
If we're going outside of the delivery area for you, tip accordingly.
If there's only one point of entry and your apartment is on the other side of the complex (that's only accessible by foot), tip accordingly.
If it's five minutes before we close, tip accordingly.
I'm fine with less than 10% for a tip, but in these special cases, I really really appreciate more than 10%.
Also, I appreciate everyone who understands the fact that some places, by paying their drivers more, end up cutting staff to keep wages competitive. Thus, sometimes a store is only staffed with a single driver.
"Please be generous with your tips."
If you decide to order a pizza just before closing time, the driver gets to go home late. Please be generous with your tips.
"Do not ask me to come inside..."
Do not ask me to come inside unless you are literally disabled and need help. Even then it makes me uncomfortable because I don't know you or who is here. I don't care if it's raining/cold, I'm fine. I don't want to go in your house and we are not supposed to anyway.
"...please don't leave me standing outside..."
When its rainy or cold, please don't leave me standing outside while you look for your money when I arrive. And no. I don't wanna step inside your house. Please just have your money ready so I can be on my way. I Have other deliveries. Also, I know it's fun for you to leave delivery instructions like "Hop on one foot while giving me my pizza" but I'm 42 yrs old. I don't feel like entertaining you for a tip. I'm not a dog.
"...just chuck on some clothes and all will be good."
I was a delivery driver for dominos during high school and I don't care if it's a hot night please wear clothes when you answer the door. The amount of times I've seen men answer the door in just a pair undies is unbelievable, just chuck on some clothes and all will be good.
"If you come to the door with fistfuls of coins..."
GiphyIf your payment involves two cupped hands worth of coins, chances are, it's not financially responsible for you to be ordering pizza.
I can't help but feel like a bit of an ass doing it, but after getting shorted a few times in the past because of it, if you come to the door with fistfuls of coins I'm going to take my pizza back to the car and count every single penny until I make sure it's all there.
"Cue the homeowner going outside..."
If you're having furniture or anything heavy delivered, move your vehicles out of your driveway before the delivery guys get there. It killed me every time I would call a customer to let them know I was X minutes away with their stuff and when I got there they had three cars in their driveway so I would sigh and park in the street in front of their house, mentally preparing myself to lug a 300 lb sofa up and across their front yard. Cue the homeowner coming outside and going "Uhhhh duhhh...do you want me to move the cars?" WELL NOT ANYMORE I DON'T.
"...don't not tip..."
This is for Domino's customers; if drivers got paid even minimum wage, tips, and the delivery fee some people think goes to us; people would be lining up out of the door begging for our jobs.
The delivery fee goes to the franchise to cover their insurance of drivers. It doesn't go to us, so don't not tip thinking the drivers are pocketing $3+ per order.
"Please update your address..."
Please update your address when you move. Nothing more irritating and intrusive than showing up at 9:30pm unannounced at someones doorstep and they have no idea who you are or why you're there. Me: "Is this (address)?" Them: "Yeeaaaa..." Me: "Are you (name)?" Them: "Nooooo...." And if you do forget, at least apologize for it. Many people are so inconsiderate. Not to mention some people do not respond to strangers very well; especially at night (not surprisingly).