These Are The Adult Equivalent Of Finding Out Santa Isn't Real
Reddit user Just_Surround_2108 asked: 'What is the adult version of finding out that Santa Claus doesn't exist?'
When we're young and naive, we tend to be optimistic as we have our whole lives ahead of us and we have to time to figure out who we are and who we want to be.
But when we're all grown up and out in the big world on our own, nothing can prepare us for the harsh realities of adulting until we experience them.
And unfortunately, life isn't always sunshine and roses the way we imagined it to be when we were much more innocent.
Curious to hear about life's many wake up calls Redditor Just_Surround_2108 asked:
"What is the adult version of finding out that Santa Claus doesn't exist?"
Life's deceptions begin slowly revealing themselves.
Caveat Emptor
"When you buy an 8-piece tupperware set, 4 of the pieces are lids."
– throwmeawaypoopy
"Same with pots and pans. What a rip off!"
– MrsMalvora
"And when you put them in the cabinet, suddenly SIX of the pieces are lids 😂"
– opheliainwaders
Value Of Friendships
"That some friends were never really your friend."
– Kangaroowrangler_02
"Also that friendships can end just like any relationship."
– ScienceUnicorn
"The best friend I'll ever have said some nasty things to me and blocked me recently. Never going to get much closure on that front."
"Not having closure is, with both friends and lovers, worse than the loss itself. I want to grow. Tell me what I need to become so this doesn't happen to me again!"
– VoxClarus
"On a related note: your co-workers are not your friends."
– tomdelfino
"I think most people seem to treat this as the default stance, but I’ve learnt you can actually make deep connections amongst coworkers, the same way you do in other stages of your life."
– immorjoe
The role of parent and child unexpectedly switches. So now what?
Who's Parenting Who
"That time period when your relationship switches and your parent looks to you for answers and advice, instead them being the one with all the answers."
– Smile_Terrible
"Not sure about that one. Dad simultaneously says I’m the smartest person he knows and I don’t know how to do anything lol."
– Puzzleheaded-Job6147
About Grieving
"When both your parents die. I am in my mid 50’s and had my mom pass on Mother’s Day ‘22. My Dad then was living with us from then, and eventually reached in-home hospice status with a sudden stage IV cancer diagnosis. He died in January of this year, and then I got laid off from my tech job and was unemployed for 10 months. Nothing takes the wonderment and positive outlook from the world than having to empty out your childhood home solo and throw everything you grew up with into a big dumpster and are left to wonder what our lives really mean."
– i_spock
Leaving Behind The House You Grew Up In
"I’m in the process of dismantling my childhood home right now. I’ve compared it to dismembering the dead body of a loved one. It’s really rough."
– HaloTightens
"my mum sold my childhood home a decade ago. i won't have to go through that."
– deathschemist
We all want to grow up when we're young. But as soon as reach reach 30, we want to slam on the breaks.
Aimlessness
"I thought I'd grow up, move out, find my footing in the grown up world and basically switch into cruise mode. Now I'm in my 40s and sh*t is confusing as f'k."
– Borsti17
"As adults, nobody knows what they're doing, we're just pretending we do."
– BeautifulMidnight-
Misconception Behind Work Integrity
"Being a hard worker and good at your job doesn't necessarily mean that you'll be rewarded for it."
– DorianOrosco
And the laziest person at work is allowed to be lazy, but the hardest worker isn’t allowed a break."
– Puzzleheaded-Job6147
We Are Our Parents
"Finding out that your parents are people, too, with weaknesses or flaws that you were blind to when you were young."
– tamammothchuk
"And the day you suddenly notice how old they are. When their mortality finally hits you."
– daggerxdarling
Living On Borrowed Time
"Yep had that day earlier this month. Was visiting for dad's 75th birthday."
"As I was leaving, out in the sunshine and fixing to get in the truck, I suddenly saw how small and frail-looking they are now. Mom hit me the hardest. She's started to shrink. They are both healthy, but Dad's just . . . worn."
"Been also doing the math lately. The math where you count up how many times you see them a year and then multiply that by how many years they have left according to the average."
"I've had enough crap and surprise losses in my life that I've long since started parting with family and friends like it might be the last time I get to see them. But that times left to see them calculation really clobbers me with my folks, and it's not even that bad yet for me. Given the ages of my grandparents when they passed I've probably still got somewhere between 150-200 visits."
"But the meter is running."
– Boudyro
I'm at the point where I'm realizing there are no handbooks on life and taking care of our parents.
When you're so used to having them there and taking care of you your whole life, nothing can prepare you for the time when that role reversal happens.
As tough as that may be, however, there's nothing more beautiful in life than returning the favor for the people who loved you unconditionally and raised you.
The Biggest Misconceptions People Had About Adulthood
Reddit user Caseated_Omentum asked: 'What's the biggest misconception you had about adulthood?'
When we were kids, we could not wait to grow up. We had big dreams about what we were going to do and who we were going to be, and we could not wait to get started.
But there were some things we were expecting that were totally off the mark, too.
Redditor Caseated_Omentum asked:
"What's the biggest misconception you had about adulthood?"
Staying Up Late
"I thought that I could stay up as late as I wanted. I envisioned myself adventuring all over town until the wee hours, meeting interesting people and experiencing life."
"Turns out 'as late as I wanted' is about 8:00 PM after a quiet night in with my girlfriend and a cup of tea."
- Calm-Ad6493
Going By Too Fast
"Time. It turns out adulthood is stuck on fast forward."
- VegetableTears
"Boy! Is this ever true! A week used to crawl by and now you blink your eyes and it's, 'Is it (choose a day) again already?'"
"Summers were almost never ending and now they are over in a blink of the eye!"
- miffsc
Lots of Guesswork Included
"I always thought that adults knew what they were doing."
- sorengray
"We're all winging it. Most of us are competent at certain s**t and can function day to day. I've been in my field for nearly five years now and work with people in my field that have been in it for nearly forty years. I'm not bad at what I do and they're great at it."
"We still end up scratching our heads, wondering what the h**l we should do next on a project, because that s**t's just weird."
- thewaterglizzy
Forever High School
"I thought graduating high school meant I'd be out of high school. It turns out that all of life is high school. I'm still dealing with the exact same problems except even fewer people care."
- Individual_Speech_10
"That was the biggest disappointment of my life. As a kid growing up, I absolutely hated most other kids for all the bulls**t mind games, bullying, playing favorites, etc. I couldn't wait to be an adult where that all stopped, life was fair, and bad people were brought to justice."
"Holy f**k was I ever wrong. As you said, adults are just kids in grown-up bodies as nothing else has changed."
- ZiggerTheNaut
Full-Circle Moment
"I was always a little salty that my dad was kind of a goofball. He'd play pranks and s**t and you couldn't confide anything seriously in him like you had a crush on a girl or something, because he'd make fun of you."
"I wanted a dad like in the movies where they put you up on their lap and say, 'Now listen here sport...+ and go into some kind of sage-like monologue on how to handle life's problems."
"Then I got to be an adult and I'm EXACTLY like my dad. And so is every other adult male I know."
- SweetCosmicPope
So Much Free Time!
"You could do anything you wanted, whenever you wanted."
"I never have the time between working full time and being exhausted the rest of the time, lol (laughing out loud)."
- ravynmaxx
Owning a Home
"Homeownership apparently, lol (laughing out loud)."
- Gentleman_T-Bone
"I came here to say this! Embarrassing, I even thought I'd have like a beach house as well. I was so dumb."
- PumpkinPieIsGreat
"Growing up, I was told I may inherit my parent's house one day. I was grateful but wasn't that excited because it was a small house on a small property and I always wanted a nice piece of land."
"Now home prices in that area are creeping into the high six-figure range and I'd be over the moon to have it."
- slinkocat
Hard Work Means Success
"If you work hard and give everything you got, then you’ll succeed and get what you worked so hard for."
- Useful_Dane_319
"As someone who works in finance, the most valuable lesson I've learned is that money doesn't come from hard work, it comes from the presence of existing money."
"Wall Street bros who make seven figures don't work any harder than your average teacher or public servant busting their butt making 50 thousand a year at best."
- AdmiralPlant
A Living Wage
"I thought that most jobs actually paid a living wage. When I was a pre-teen, I thought that all you had to do was show up to basically any job clean, polite (and don't be a total id**t obviously, but you don't have to be Einstein either), and work 40 hours a week, and you would have everything you need."
- True-Sound-9240
Easier After Graduation
"I was under the false impression that having a job would be less stressful than going through school."
- Friendly_Neighbor12
"Well, it depends. Until I was 14, I used to go to school from 7:30 AM to 4:30 PM with an hour to get lunch. When I got home, I still had to do homework or study for tests. Now I work the same amount of hours but when I finish working, I'm free to do whatever I want. So I would say at least in my case that school was way more stressful."
- CollapseIntoNow
Happily Ever After
"I thought you'd always have a relationship and money and you lived happily ever after."
- llcucf80
Chronic Illness
"I thought that your body would remain healthy. I got chronically sick in my late 20s (27+). I'm 33 now, and I hate it. Docs still don’t know what’s up. SMH (Shaking my head)."
- xAdrtxx
Natural Obstacles
"I believed quicksand would be a real concern."
- Euclid_Interloper
"I thought being on fire would be a more common occurrence, what with how often we were taught about stop, drop, and roll."
- anonymousbach
Professionally Independent
"I used to think adults had autonomy in their jobs. Like, as a professional who went to college, your expertise and knowledge would be sought after and people would treat you with respect. But no, we're just capitalist pawns."
- Majestic_Heart_9271
Actually Much Better Than Expected
"That it would be zero fun and all bills."
"This is way better and more carefree than childhood! No one controls me and I don’t have to babysit anyone if I don’t want to! No one yells at me and I can 'talk back' if I want to!"
"I can just… be. I don’t have to beg and plead to leave the house and see friends."
- Dom-Franson
"I think this ALL the time. I'll be having the time of my life just... I don't know, WEARING SHORTS IN PUBLIC, or HANGING OUT WITH SOMEONE THAT ISN'T A FAMILY MEMBER, or something absolutely crazy like that, at almost 30 years old, and think, 'Wait, why were all the adults in my life when I was little telling me adulthood would suck so much because I would have to figure everything out for myself?'"
"That's the part I love the most about adulthood. No controlling, narcissistic, emotionally abusive a**holes around to dictate my every move and tell me I'm a worthless female. H**l, I don't even have to speak to them as an adult!"
- thatonespicegirl
For most, adulthood fell far short of what their childhood dreams called for.
But a few loved the independence that came with adulthood after having traumatic childhoods.
This is one of those concepts that is all about perspective, and all we can really do is try to make the best of it.
We get it, we're all super busy, and sometimes it's really hard to get all the chores done around work and living our lives.
But there are appliances we can have in our home, like a dishwasher, that can make those chores much more convenient.
However, they could really ruin our day, too, if we use them incorrectly.
Redditor Loud-Situation2643 asked:
"What should never go into the dishwasher?"
Can This Go Without Saying?
"The toilet brush! I read a story here about somebody that does that regularly."
- BOFHOOC
"That’s disturbing. I had a landlord tell me to put my cat’s litter box in the dishwasher weekly to keep the cat smell down. I did not take her up on that advice."
- annissamazing
"Your toilet brush. My friend found out the hard way her housemate was doing this WHILE DOING THE DISHES."
- raz0rflea
Apparently... Dinner?
"Fish. I worked apartment maintenance and a lovely old couple ruined, like, three dishwashers in a row by using them to steam fish. Very gross, considering the pre-wash cycle uses the gray water from the last cycle."
"Smelled pretty bad, too."
- poppykayak
"Lasagna."
- SiloueOfUlrin
High-Quality Knives
"I'll admit, we run some knives through, but only the crummy ones. The good ones, NEVER, and ideally those are hand-washed right away after use and not left to sit with anything on them."
- InannasPocket
Cast Iron Accessories
"I found a La Creuset Dutch Oven on clearance sale at crate and barrel of all places. I immediately bought it. Still, a lot of money to spend, but it was the best purchase I ever made for my kitchen."
"I fully understand why people pass these down from generation to generation. It’s in amazing condition for the number of times I’ve used it. And it’s dishwasher safe!"
"I still hand wash mine, because it’s like a child to me, and I don’t trust my partner to handle it! I always said I’d be a chef if I didn’t love what I do right now. So the fancy kitchen stuff I have always gets hand washed."
"P.S. their website says it’s dishwasher safe, but they recommend a hand wash for longevity and because the enamel can eventually wear down in a dishwasher."
- TheGhostofGiggy
Also, Wooden Kitchen Accessories
"Wooden Cutting boards."
- theSealclubberr
"This is one of my luxuries in life. Using a machine to wash your wooden spoons will shorten their life by a lot. Hand washed and well cared for a wooden spoon will last decades."
"A set of bamboo wooden spoons is like $12, so I buy a new set every year or two. $12 to not hand wash every night? Yes please."
- mwbbrown
Liquid Dish Soap. Enough Said.
"My daughter did this once, WOW, what a soapy disaster."
- CRCs_Reality
Also, Laundry Detergent
"When I first moved into my own apartment, my mom gave me a sandwich bag full of about a dozen detergent pods as a 'These will help you start off on your own' gesture."
"The first night of living in my own apartment, I fired up the dishwasher. 20 minutes later while playing video games, I noticed this wave of suds moving toward me from the kitchen. When I say a wave, I mean it. I have never seen so many d**n bubbles."
"That’s how I learned my wonderful mom gave me both dishwasher detergent pods AND laundry detergent pods in the same sandwich bag. I had a 50/50 odds and boy did I lose, lmao (laughing my a** off)."
"Needless to say, this happening on my first night living on my own had me questioning what I was doing, and if I would be better off living in my mom’s basement for the rest of eternity."
- mitten_man69
We Need a Storytime for This One
"The part of the blender that says, 'Do Not Immerse.'"
- PomeloLongjumping537
Protect the Detailed Glassware at All Costs
"All my PRETENTIOUS fancy brewery glasses. Those designs are staying where they are."
- JonathanWattsAuthor
"I put a printed shot glass into the dishwasher that was part of a set. It came out clean all right, picture completely dissolved."
- Luneowl
That Would Be Terrible
"Your secret cash stash."
- ThinkingOz
Ew ew ew.
"Mashed potato residue. Oh my god, it gets on EVERYTHING. Especially if the chunks are too large to fit through the filter. It just sits in the water and coats everything."
- ioncloud9
For the 'Friends' Fans Out There
"Paper, snow… A ghost!"
- TheAceBoogie
Divorce.
"I found out recently, you aren't supposed to put your girlfriend's collectible Starbucks cups in there."
"They melt."
- scumbag801
Reddit's Got Jokes
"A baby."
- DrunkWestTexan
"As a new father, I wish you'd told me earlier."
- ancalime9
And Feathered Jokes
"A duck."
- beetus_gerulaitis
"Who are you that you are so wise in the ways of science?"
- MacTechG4
While dishwashers were invented to make our lives a little bit easier when it's time to wash the dishes, there are some items that, when placed in there, could really ruin someone's day.
People Explain Which Activities They Did Wrong For Years Until Someone Showed Them What To Do
As humans, it's impossible for us to know everything, including the most efficient ways to do things.
But while we may know that, it's still frustrating when we discover there may have been an easier way to do something all along.
Even on TikTok, one of the top trends features users who discover a simpler, more efficient way to do something in their thirties or forties, before they robustly claim that they "learn more on TikTok than they ever did in school."
Fortunately for those who may not use the app, Redditors were ready to share their favorite finds in the thread.
Eager to learn more, Redditor slart_n asked:
"What everyday activity did you do wrong for years, before someone finally showed you an important trick?"
Restock Issues
"Not every day for everyone, but it WAS every cashier at my job... we had cigarette cases at the self-checkout that we could unlock and get packs out of for customers, so we didn't have to walk all the way to the big register to get them every time."
"Restocking them was a pain in the *ss, one pack at a time, pushing the little spring loader thing back with each one, squeezing them in next to each other..."
"We did it this way for years. It was how I had been shown how to restock them. YEARS. At least seven!! SEVEN. YEARS."
"And then one day I was pulling the price tags off to change them out, and one was a little stubborn. I gave it a little yank upwards and suddenly THE ENTIRE SHELF SLID RIGHT OUT ON ROLLERS."
"The way my jaw dropped. I think I actually swore out loud. It was SO MUCH EASIER to restock them. I ended up showing every single one of the other self-checkout cashiers, and every single one was blown away. Even the ones who had been there way longer than me."
"None of us knew the shelves pulled out. Not even the manager! She actually said, 'Are you f**king kidding me?!' when I showed her."
"I can't believe we all went that freaking long without knowing the shelves pulled out. Years of stocking those things one pack at a time. Then again, if we had known and been using it, they probably would have been broken like everything else in that place."
- TinyCatCrafts
Physical Gains
"I never thought I needed a workout routine as long as I worked different parts of my body on days until I watched an Arnold Schwarzenegger video on how he makes sure every single muscle gets hit in a three-day period. Since then I noticed more gains than I had made all year."
- NeverMindWait
Chopsticks and Pens
"Someone told me I used chopsticks wrong. I put the second one on the side of my ring finger, with my index and middle fingers on top of it. The person told me to just hold it like I would hold a pen, and I was like, what the f**k, this is how I hold a pen."
"Then I realized I hold a pen differently from most people."
"I've since retrained myself to hold chopsticks correctly, but I'm not even going to try to change how I write because it's just ingrained so deeply (and also, it doesn't really matter anyway)."
- Wegzuwerfendes_Konto
Remaking Beds
"Put on pillow covers. I used to shove the pillow in there and struggle with it until my wife showed me how to flip the pillowcase inside out and cover the pillow while flipping right side out."
- Immediate_Papayas
Hanging a Picture the First Time
"If you’re mounting something to the wall that has pre-designed holes on the back, rather than measure between the holes and try to space the nails/screws accordingly, stretch a single piece of painter's tape (blue tape) across the back of the piece from just before the beginning of the first hole to just after the last one."
"Mark each hole with a pencil/pen on the painter's tape, then place the tape on the wall and voila, you have a perfect mounting template. I suggest you do a quick check with a laser level on the wall just to make sure your marks are level before drilling."
"I work as a freelance handyman, and when my Dad showed me this trick it blew my mind. Seriously, ask a usually quiet and reserved Dad if he has any DIY hot tips and you’re bound to get some solid gold advice.
- darthva
How Was That, Now?
"Opening a beverage can."
"I keep my fingernails very short and sometimes it would be a bit finicky to open the tab on a can."
"I was d**n near 40 years old when my buddy showed me you’re supposed to push down on the hinge portion of the tab (the little dot toward the middle) with your thumb to raise the other edge of the tab so you can get your finger under it. I felt like an id**t."
- funklab
Text Editing Made Easy
"When texting, sliding your thumb on the spacebar of your phone will move the cursor."
- UnfairMicrowave
Goth Life
"Boots first, then corset."
- Ellesworth
Tomato Paste Push-Pops
"Those tiny, obnoxious cans of tomato paste. You can take both ends off with the can opener, and use a wooden spoon to push on the top. It comes out clean like a push-pop!"
- knittybitty123
Gift Card Identity
"Whenever a 'free' service asks for a credit card, I input the information from the back of a gift card. Trust no one on the internet."
- II_Confused
The Last of the Soap
"When the soap bar gets to the last sliver, you can just stick it onto the new bar to use it up completely."
- finlyboo
New Deoderant
"Taking the safety cap off of deodorant."
"I used to try to get my fingernails under it and pop it off. They were quite a pain in the a** to get off."
"In my late 20s, my roommate was talking to me while unpacking her groceries and she opened her deodorant and just twisted up the stick so that the cap came off. I was shocked."
- dinosarahsaurus
In-Kitchen Gardens
"Leek will continue to grow when put in water. When you have used all the green parts, and only the boring white stuff is left, put its roots in water for a few days and the green parts will grow back."
- scutterpikk
Wasted Produce
"Not an everyday activity, but someone showed me I'd been wasting celery for years. When it goes limp and loses its crunch, you can just soak it in water overnight, and it makes it crisp again."
"When celery goes limp, it's only because the water content has been reduced over time. Same with some other crunchy vegetables. I use the same trick with daikon radishes to make them fresh again."
- joec_95123
Dishwashing Efficiency
"You can take the silverware basket out of the dishwasher when unloading it."
"You can also set it on the counter next to the sink when you’re loading to keep from having to bend over to put things in the basket over and over."
- 877-Cash-Meow
While all of these lessons are pretty simple in and of themselves, they could make a big difference in someone's life if they've been taking a much more complicated route all this time, especially if they're in their thirties or later.
People Who Gave Up Their Dream For A Stable Job Explain Whether They Regret Their Decision
When I was little, I dreamt about becoming a famous actress who made lots of money, got interviewed by big names in the entertainment industry, and attended red-carpet events.
While I would never say no if I were ever offered a movie role, I know my shyness coupled with my lack of experience means I'll never make a living as an actress. I have a proper adult job, and I focus on working, taking care of my family, and learning useful skills, such as how to cook. Acting is not a part of my daily life.
Now, I know I was never meant to be an actress. I may be able to act, but I'm way too shy to get up on stage. It's not something I'm truly sad about.
However, there are people who have similar dreams and tried to make it happen. Unfortunately, they had to face the truth that they either couldn't achieve their dreams or took their dream as far as it would go, and had to go down a different path.
Many people on Reddit are sharing how they tried to get their dream job, but were forced to give up on it, and what regrets, if any, they have about that,
Curious to find out more, Redditor GeneReddit123 asked:
"Redditors who gave up pursuing their 'dream' to settle for a more secure or comfortable life, how did it turn out and do you regret your decision?"
Some people gave up on their dreams, but found a good life, and rarely, if ever, think about their past dreams.
The Dream Wasn't What I Thought
"My dream was to become a translator for Nintendo, specifically the Zelda franchise. Studied Japanese and lived there for a year, then became a video game translator at a small studio. Afterwards a Localization Project Manager at a bigger Korean company. Worked my way up to maybe, maybe one day be hired by Nintendo. Lost more and more passion for games on the way, heard awful stories about working at Nintendo and slowly realized that this isnt the right job for me after all. Translators are - most of the time - underpaid and the whole thing isn't as romantic as it seems. Decided to do something entirely else, left the gaming and Localization industry and am now a really happy (and well paid) Product Manager for an e-commerce company. I will never go back. Knowing Japanese (well, the bit that is left after not using it for years) is a good party trick still, so no regrets. Was a fun time but it had to end."
– Odango777
"People don't realize that institutions, like corporations, often utilize worker passion as an excuse to mistreat them (pay less, make unsustainable demands). Thus why a story like yours just echoes through this whole thread. For example, it's what the world is doing to a whole generation of frontline healthcare workers rn."
– ishitar
Music vs. Education
"When I was in college, I wasn't the most enthusiastic student. I barely hung onto my grades and spent most of my time partying. I mostly hung out with a buddy of mine who played drums for a thrash punk band that was on the cusp of being something. He taught me how to play and I was surprisingly good at the drums."
"One day, my buddy broke his arm and the band asked me to sub in for him. I played like five shows with them and had a hell of a time doing it. While he was recovering, my buddy wound up moving out of state and the band asked if I wanted to replace him permanently."
"I think about that moment a lot, but wound up changing my major and getting through college. I now work in IT for a large company and think it worked out for the best. In hindsight, the music was pretty much unlistenable and the band went no-where, but there are definitely days when I'm overwhelmed at work and I wonder what could have been. Maybe it's just age at this point, but I don't think I could have kept up with it for long."
– FakePlasticSN
Not Quite Good Enough
"Turned out great, just not right at the moment as I am still job hunting after having to quit my previous job. Still no regrets though."
"I went to college to become a 3D animator. Something I always dreamed about. I was top of the class, constantly won awards for my work. I honestly thought I was going to make it big. Then the final semester started and all the seniors were required to go to a special hiring event where tons of big names would be. I got my portfolio and resume copies ready to go, and spent hours researching the big names and their projects as well as rehearsing lots of practice questions."
"It was devastating. No one would look twice at my stuff. Introduced myself, made some awkward small talk as they were so disinterested, then as I walked away they would immediately put it in the stack with hundreds of other portfolios, and not in the special pile."
"I switched up my game. I started introducing myself with a quick mention that I had a background in programming (I did). Thinking that maybe that would give me an edge. Oh boy did it work. Suddenly I was getting personal business cards, phone numbers and emails, my resume was put on the special pile."
"It was at that moment I realized I went into the wrong field. I was just a tiny insignificant drop in a sea of artists, many of whom were much more talented than I could ever be."
"Finished up my degree and went back to college for a BS in Computer Science. Got my first job right out of college from an internship I did over the summer. The job itself was heaven, and I really enjoyed it. It also helped that I made bank when I was there. Paid off all my school loans within 3 years and had plenty to invest and put into savings."
"While it sucks not having anything right now, I'm hoping to find something soon."
"Side note: The 3D stuff I still do as a hobby. Not nearly as good as I once was, but it is still fun and relaxing."
– -PM_me_your_recipes-
Not Too Surprising
"It was fine, but no one gives a sh*t if you're a professional bassoonist and there really isn't enough paying work."
"I did it professionally for eight years before quitting to raise kids. Now I work in IT. If I had to do it over again, I'd have just gotten a real job and not put so much time into an instrument that I don't like playing."
– RPBN
"You know what the bassoon is? It’s a cry for help!”
– but_uhm
Others do have regrets about not following their dreams, or trying and giving up too soon.
The Band Didn't Make It
"Honestly turned out great. I realised my band wasn’t going to get a record deal after a few years and then after playing for other peoples bands for a while it started to become less fun."
"I got a ‘proper’ job, started working on my career and used my new spare time to start playing rugby again. Now I’ve got a really good job in a sector I enjoy working in, married, kids, nice house all that stuff and I still play rugby on Saturdays (pre pandemic) to keep things a little different as well as keeping in shape."
"I don’t really see it as giving up on my dream. It was just recognizing that it wasn’t going to happen. I’m very fond of that period of my life and having spent quite a few years chasing that particular dream I don’t have any regrets or what-if’s about being in a band."
– jprimus
They Rose Again
"I worked in video games for almost 19 years. I worked for Sega as a tester in college, got a masters degree in education and worked for The Learning Company designing educational games. The educational software market started to collapse."
"I eventually left the industry for other fields but I miss making games for kids."
"I’ve met so many people who grew up playing the games I designed and built. Maybe after my kids are out if the house I’ll try to make games again."
– practicalm
Writing Isn't Just Writing
"Being a successful writer means taking on far more than just writing your book or short story."
"I'm a medical writer for a cancer center and love it, but I always wanted to write other things as well. I spent two years writing the memoir of a friend who served as a helicopter crew chief in Vietnam, including time in special ops running covert missions into Laos and Cambodia. I hoped to publish it, but finding an agent has beaten me down."
"Today you can't be just a good writer; you need to have a strong presence on social media, with a lot of followers on Twitter/Facebook and a popular blog, because agents and publishers expect you to be the marketing engine."
"I'm in my 60s now and just don't have that level of energy anymore. It's not the writing that's hard -- it's the hustle."
– BSB8728
Doctor, Doctor!
"Part of me regretted it, part of me knew I had to."
"I always wanted to be a doctor. No pushy parents or anything like that. I just wanted to fix problems, and medical things seemed like the most interesting problems, things change, get worse/better, and add new problems. My little brother was born and developed seizures and developmental issues. I decided Pediatrics was for me! The same problems/puzzles but with the added intrigue of the patient being unable to tell me what was wrong. Sounds a bit sick, but that's what my brain wanted."
"I didn't get the grades at school, unfortunately, my step dad died, and it messed me up a bit being needed at home with my siblings, and I shifted my focus. I did go to university, did an access course and a biology degree with the aim of then going on to medicine afterward. Sadly, I got two rejections for med school (on my birthday no less), and I pissed away the rest of my final year, because...what was the point anymore??"–
"I then met a boy (now husband), and needed to get a job. Any job. Please just give me a job. Countless applications were ignored or rejected. I felt worse than useless. I finally landed a job at a call centre. Hated every minute of it. But bills got paid, a wedding and honeymoon have been paid for, and we bought our house..."
"But. In 2019 I knew I was turning thirty soon and knew this wasn't what I wanted, even if it was what I needed."
"I enrolled at a local college on an access course and last year I passed with distinction. I applied to a few university courses, and I had two successful interviews. I quit my sucky job on new year's after nearly 6 years of hating it. And in two weeks I start my course to become a nurse."
"Plans change, needs must. But I'm hoping its worked out..."
– Jynxiii
The Music Still Moves Me
"TLDR: I went from being a pro musician, signed to a label to working IT Security. I make great money but I'm kinda miserable."
"I go back and forth. Mostly regret. Covid has given me a strange new perspective on what is and isn't worth pursuing in life."
"I was a former professional musician in my late teens to mid twenties. Got the degree, started a band, worked our butta off and got signed to a label that later became notorious for ripping bands off. (Name rhymes with Prick Story Bread Chords)"
"I toured the country, played in front of thousands of people, recorded a couple of kick-@ss albums and played gigs several days a week for nearly a decade of my life."
"Problem was, that entire time: I didn't make a nickel. I was broke ALL the time. I didn't officially move out of my parent's house completely until I was 24. I had apartments and roommate situations, sure, but for many years I had to have my safety net of my Mom and Step Dad, which is embarrassing."
"I remember the day I decided to quit the band I was in. We drove 12+ hours to Atlanta for a music festival, only to be told on arrival that we were bumped from the bill. Not only that, but the promoter decided to compensate us with a measly $100 for our inconvenience. $100 split among five dudes. It wasn't worth the hard work anymore, living in a van and eating gas station food and military rations to survive. I quit the band not long after."
"Long story short, I transitioned into IT."
"I make six figures, own a house, have a wife and a top of the line Nissan Armada Platinum in my driveway and frankly, I couldn't be more miserable if I tried."
""Fx this!""
"What's the status on this situation?"
"Sorry you're on your honeymoon, but software just went down and we need your help"
"You aren't professional enough. You need to work on your communication."
"Good job getting all of your work done without ever needing help. You're super good at your job, but it isn't quite enough for us. You need to be perfect."
"You did 99% of your job perfectly but didn't send an email fast enough. You're useless."
"Sorry... got lost in the rant but my point stands. I'm half tempted to move to Vegas and work as a hired gun in a casino band. Those a-holes make money hand over fist playing covers from the 80s."
Deleted User
A few people dreamt about having a good job or a lovely family, and have achieved those goals.
There's No Such Thing As A Dream Job
"I wish I'd realised sooner that work is just work for me, there is no dream job. I just want something I'm good at with decent pay and no stress, think I've found it."
– SlightlyIncandescent
"Same. I think some adults really need to stop pressuring children to find their ultimate passion and translate it into their future career. That line of thinking led to a lot of anguish in college, and some adult depression. I still kinda feel like I’m adrift in the ocean. We need more talk about how work is sometimes just work, and that’s OKAY. It doesn’t mean you’re a failure."
– YeOldeOrc
"The biggest scam ever to exist is making you feel like your dream is a job"
– DiaryoftheOriginator
A Good Life Is The Dream
"When I was younger my dad told me to find a job I don’t hate that allows me to live comfortably financially and provides a good work/life balance, because no matter how much you love your job to start, it’s still work. So that’s what I did. The best advice I’ve ever recorded honestly. I put in the hours and fully focus on work when I’m there, then I leave it at the door."
– ashboify
"Right? The dream is to be able support myself, not completely hate my job, and be able to take vacation like, once a year."
– Sun_on_my_shoulders
"Yup. I stopped really giving a damn about two years ago- now it doesn't really matter what I end up doing, as long as I can support myself and my cat and I don't outright hate my job."
– Deleted User
Ultimately though, most people were able to achieve a different dream and are happy, even if they miss their old dreams a little bit.
Making Movies...Sort Of
"A little bit. I bounced around the lower levels of the film industry, earning nothing, earning $5 a day, earning $8.20 an hour. I really enjoyed most jobs, got some great stories. But after 10+ years of missed opportunities, missing out on jobs to those more connected, of not having enough to do (I could blame the early days of digital but I just didn't go hard enough), it was time. My 30's were approaching, I had less than 5 figures in the bank despite still living at home and having next to no expenses, my romantic life consisted of admiring the actresses from afar and being an @ss to anyone who got close."
"I switched to teaching and I mostly enjoy the work. I still tap into my skills occasionally, I make movies with my classes, last year made a whole bunch during remote teaching. I actually had the self-esteem (and cash) to start dating and am now engaged to a girl I don't deserve and have been trying to marry for months."
"I don't regret it, but I do miss it."
– goodie23
We can't always achieve our dreams, but sometimes there's something even better waiting for us!