Whoops!: Common Mistakes People Make In Their 30s
Reddit user cthulhu34 asked: 'What’s a common mistake people make in their 30s?'
Most people think that by the time they're in their 30s, they'll have their life together.
It's only when they get to that point that they realize that's not totally true.
Maybe those in their 30s have a job, are in a serious relationship, and have a home. Perhaps they're married or have kids.
However, that doesn't mean they don't make mistakes.
According to Reddit, people in their 30s make all kinds of mistakes, and Redditors are ready to share what those mistakes are.
It all started when Redditor cthulhu34 asked:
"What’s a common mistake people make in their 30s?"
Toxicity
"Stay in unhealthy toxic relationships."
– Lavenderplatte
"Alternatively, leaving healthy relationships because you’re bored and want to have fun."
– numenik
Too Scary
"Romanticizing your 20s and fearing your 40s. (live where you are)."
– theresites
"This is so good. So easy to romanticize the past and fear the future. Life is organic and so are we. We will keep changing and often times in a good way (stronger, wiser, more confident etc.). I'm so happy to be who I am at 37."
– iamnottheuser
Compare and Contrast
"Comparing their lifestyle to other 30-somethings."
– Affectionate_Item_51
"This is a good one. Your peer’s success can seem perfect from afar and make you feel inadequate."
"But if you sit down and talk with them you will learn all sorts of shortcomings and difficulties in their life that will make you appreciate something about yourself and your situation."
"In other words we all just out here tryna function."
– ThunderBobMajerle
It's Never Too Late
"Thinking they are too old. Never too late to switch career paths or look for a new relationship or start taking care of your health."
– Mans_Got_Cheaks
"Almost 40, just started my MBA. Never too old!"
– AbsoluteCP
"It's absolutely never too late. I'm 42 and honestly feel like everything is getting better, ESPECIALLY dating and relationships in general. It's a relief to finally know myself and what I want."
"Also, I'm returning to study next year and looking forward to a career change. Having a beginner's mindset, always curious and learning. My dad is an inspiration, her had a stroke in his 60's and changed his life. After he recovered, he got a divorce, moved countries and decided to study medicine. He's now in his 70's living this dream and working as a doctor. It's never too late!"
"I feel and look younger than when I was 30! I know many people well into their 60's and 80's with this growth mindset and I'm determined to be like that until I die."
– Tank_Grill
Healthy Living
"Not exercising enough and eating a crappy diet. You can't get away with those things anymore like you did in your 20's."
– DeathSpiral321
"My doc told me at the end of last year that I'm not 16 anymore and now is the time in my life where I get to decide whether I want to see my daughters grow up or whether I wanna die of a heart attack in my 50s. Sh*t cut deep but I got the message lol."
"Dropped 40 pounds since January and might be in the best shape of my life tbh."
– Misdirected_Colors
Friends Forever
"Your 30s is when you are really in the thick of "adulting". It's easy to loose focus on what is really important to you among all the demands and responsibilities."
"Not Fostering Friendships: As you enter your 30s, maintaining and nurturing friendships becomes more challenging. It's a time when connections can fade, and forming new ones becomes harder. It's very important to invest effort in the friendships you currently have. Edit: A few people have commented about what to do when people don't reciprocate? My advise - keep trying! Everyone is under water in their 30's, they likely won't be able to make every attempt at outreach you make. But over time as things become less hectic they will remember you kept trying (without guilt) and will appreciate it and come back to you. But toxic people, yeah cut those out!"
– hyperside89
Romance
"Not Nurturing Your Romantic Relationship: Responsibilities increase in your 30s like careers, parenthood, and caregiving for aging parents. It's common for the most crucial relationship – your romantic partnership – to be inadvertently neglected. Avoid taking your partner for granted, assuming they'll always be around, or treating them as an outlet for your worst moments."
– hyperside89
Be Who You Are
"Not Preserving Your Identity: Similar to the previous points, your 30s come with a whirlwind of conflicting priorities that can lead you to lose touch with your identity. It's easy to forget what truly brings you joy and satisfaction. Maintain a hobby that gives your life purpose and regularly reflect on whether your job still fulfills your needs in terms of purpose, financial stability, and overall satisfaction."
– hyperside89
"I'm 33 and in the process of rediscovering who I am, what I like doing beyond just 'filling in time' and how I like to present myself. It's scary to be caught off guard by the realisation that you don't know you and just as scary trying to start down a path to change that."
"I'm happy with my job and my role as a mother. But as an individual... I just feel like a crusty 90's kid, wearing 00's fashion and focusing on everyone else's needs because it's hard to find a direction for me that will 'spark joy'. I want my wonder and whimsy back!"
– Makasaurus
Change Always Happens
"Thinking you're a finished product, not likely to change all that much."
– kat_Folland
"Have you tried not moving in the ocean? It’s damn impossible. You can’t be stagnant in the turmoil of this world."
– quanoey
NOT Forever Young
"Biggest mistake I made in my 30's was not enjoying them more."
"Young enough to party, still play some sports, and perfectly in place in any bar. You have energy, you have a circle of friends (that will get smaller, trust me)."
"Try to carpe a diem every once in a while, the decade passes VERY quickly."
– hockeynoticehockey
"Do whatever you can while you are young. 30s is a peak time. I'm 64 now, forced into early retirement, and I can't do half the things I "thought" I would be able to do in "retirement". Can't bend to do gardening, can't climb the ladder to get into the pool, can't handle a walk for more than a few minutes due to arthritis and more. I'm mentally "still young" but my body is telling me otherwise."
– saywhat1206
Life Is Tough
"Got laid off at 32? Just said F it, got 2 degrees in different fields (37 now). But I kept expenses really low and saved/invested a lot of money when I did work. I went from medical research, to analytics, to education, to computer science now."
"30's...uhhh not starting investing by 35, because that's the last stop on the compounding train."
"Also, I see people get wrecked by bad marriages/relationships. That's probably one of the biggest wealth and happiness destroyers I've seen."
"Also, waiting over the fertility window. People tried to have kids later on and it looks like an absolutely expensive brutal experience with the OBGYN visits and the $15k USD IVF rounds (multiples). Then dating over your thirties seems like a hopeless market from what I can see. I never really tried so I dunno (data analyst in me looked over the stats as a 5'7 East Asian male in North America, I'm out!)..."
"Oh yeah!!! Health! Working out is crucial. After 40 it gets super tough to achieve any exceptional fitness goals. That's the best case scenario. Some people come down with nasty metabolic diseases like diabetes, and the CVDs - hypertension, cholesterol, and heart disease - these are very difficult to reverse and they kind of stick to you with more aggressively the longer they persist."
"Also, daily brushing/flossing, apparently dentists are expensive in older age. Brushing avoids cavities, flossing avoids gum disease and cavities."
"Also, not constantly learning about economics and economic/social/technological/political trends, because the pace of technology will wipe out people's economic opportunities faster than their head can spin. I see a lot of people get broad sided by economic malaise because they didn't get their financial house in order before a crisis hit. Life can be rough!"
– Deleted User
I'm not 30 yet, but I sure will learn from these stories!
When you're young, it's easy to think you've got plenty of time to responsibly live your life and learn essential life skills. This is especially true in your 20s.
In your 20s, you're just out of school, working on advancing yourself career-wise, and you want to just enjoy your youth. While there's nothing wrong with that -- you should enjoy your youth -- you have to start some life planning as well.
By the time you get to 30, you'll realize you're too late to the party on things like getting your degree, living a financially healthy life, and, according to Redditors, dental care. Use your 20s to have fun, but make sure you also take advantage of being young. Sometimes, your youth is the exact right time to start good habits.
This is probably the philosophy behind Redditor give_me_wings101 question:
"What’s that one thing people in their 20s should definitely do before turning 30?"
Dental Care
"TAKE CARE OF YOUR TEETH"
"Always. Rule number one of all time. Please please PLEASE take care of your teeth."
"I don’t care how old you are/will be etc."
– Leading_Funny5802
Time to Quit
"If you smoke cigarettes - quit. It's all sh*ts-n-giggles when you're in your 20s, but it'll catch up to you way quicker than you think. If you quit now your body still has time to heal much of the damage that has been done to it."
– YouWillGiveMeTP
Do It While You're Young
"This, though I was going to say "lose weight.""
"The change in your metabolism from the 20's to the 30's makes it much, much harder to do."
– FearGunner
People Go and Come
"Realize that your friend group from your early 20s will most likely look completely different by your later 20s and into your 30s and that's ok."
– forman98
Expect The Plan To Go Wrong
"Life plans don't really work for 90% of people. Especially nowadays. Basically we're all stumbling along trying to figure sh*t out as we go."
"I'm a cook/restaurant manager now. Studied economics and politics at uni. Lol. Pretty happy though. Life is strange."
– No_Belt3011
In A Rich Man's World
"Become financially literate"
– Historical-Major1832
Educate Yourself
"Go back to school if you are wondering if you should.. I went back at 28, graduated at 33, as a 40 year old I am patting my 28 year old self on the back."
– tangoshukudai
Protect Yourself
"Wear sunscreen! Wrinkles suck and melanomas kill."
– LunaGloria
Keep On Moving
"Exercise."
"My doctor told me most people don’t fix their bodies in their 30s and then it becomes unfixable when they get to their 40s and on."
– ImGoingToSayOneThing
30 Years Young
"Stop yourself from saying you are "so old" now."
"And continue to hit pause on that thought in your 30s. Consider that you're simply grown instead. You've still got plenty of time to actually get old, no need to rush it. You can put that off longer than you think."
– dark_blue_7
That last one is some great advice. Yes, you should use your 20s to start your life planning, but never count yourself out because you think you're too "old" either.
Every age has it's pitfalls and perks. You've just got to figure out what they are so you can reap the benefits and avoid the drawbacks.
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