"Redditors with SOs who talk in their sleep, what is the creepiest thing they've said?"
Double Entendre Maybe?
“'Steven'.”
"What?"
“'He’s coming out of the faucet'.”
"What?!"
“'STEVEN’S COMING OUT OF THE FAUCET!”'- pinnietans
You Get Used To It After A While
"I talk in my sleep."
"My wife has told me many stories."
"the best one hands down has to be when she was pregnant, she woke up with really bad heart burn and nausea."
"She tried to wake me up and tell me she's not feeling well."
"She tells me I legit said 'you know those feelings you are feeling? just turn them off' and fell back to sleep."
"I'm really lucky my wife knows I sleep talk and loves me."
"She doesn't hold anything i say like that against me, just teases me a lot."- CubbyNINJA
Speaking Metophorically?
"My SO informed me one morning that he had woken up in the middle of the night with my face inches from his, my finger in his ear and I was apparently whispering, 'I just need to get in, let me in!''- veenabaneena
Movie Love GIF by Lauren JenkinsGiphySurely They Think They're Worth More Than That?
"She said 'Don't leave me for $3'."- bf0caiig
... Be More Specific?
"My boyfriend once cupped my crotch in his sleep and said, 'Two out of five stars'.”- irish-ygritte
"Bug"ing Out...
"I come in to go to bed, lay down and am about to turn the bedside lamp off."
'Cue him turning over, eyes still shut, obviously still asleep."
'Don’t turn the light off'.”
"I’m confused now, 'why?'"
“'They need to see."
”'Now I’m freaking the f*ck out wondering who is in our bedroom that I haven’t noticed."
“'Who needs to see?'”
"'The bugs.'”
“'Why do the bugs need to see?'”
“'To read'.”
'This happened months ago and I still haven’t let it go."- BoldBupropion
Fox Artists On Tumblr GIF by Animation Domination High-DefGiphyAs Long As He Could Laugh About It.
"He did that sit straight up in bed thing that I thought only happened in movies then shouted 'they're coming for my skinnnn'."
"Chuckled then fell back asleep."- visionsofk
Not The Answer They Were Expecting
"My mother loves to still bring this story up, happened back during my 8th grade year of school."
"One morning she walked in to see if I was awake, so she asked 'are you awake?' to which I apparently said 'f*ck, I don't know is it meteors' all while dead asleep."- schrack
So Many Questions...
"Not SO, but a roommate, woke up the whole house shouting 'Where is the head?! Where is the head?!'."- lotnia
animation monday GIF by Tony BabelGiphyWho knows what's going through our partners minds when they begin talking in their sleep.
More often than not, they're probably in the midst of an intense dream or nightmare, and it's nothing to worry about in the grand scheme of things.
Should you ever hear your partner call out for "Ralph" however, you may have legitimate cause for concern...
Redditor Gifwii wanted to hear all the ways we'd all react when betrayed by the ones we love.
So they asked:
"If you caught your best friend having sex with your wife, what would you do?"
How can people betray one another like that?
Gross
Say Word Lol GIF by Desus & MeroGiphy"Be weirded out because they are brother and sister."
roadkilled_skunk
"Haha... I'm also dating my best friend’s sister."
Alcoholic__Engineer
Ok Dateline...
"I'm more concerned on how he found her body."
Smiddy3663
"If he's really your best friend, he helped bury it."
Inside-Effective-353
Hey Bestie
"I don't think he would. I had him neutered as a puppy."
a5redwing
"This reply was made extremely funny (or concerning) by the fact that I took it as someone neutering an actual person when they became friends."
DuCKDisguise
Never Cry Wolf...
"Take his car keys and drive to his place. It's all yours now buddy."
gerbageman
"Hol' up, remember to make it official. You have to p*ss a border around your new acquisition like in Never Cry Wolf, and if any relatives of the former owner are present you need to mark the ones you can't mate with, and you know, mate with the others."
SuboptimalButHopeful
"With that logic, I guess his house and and family are mine now? That's okay with me, his wife is pleasant to be around."
Savageturtles
Betrayal...
Julio Cesar Rome GIF by Luis RicardoGiphy"That happened to me 30 years ago and I haven’t been able to fall in love since."
TalboGold
"I'd be more unwilling to make best friends than rather than unable to develop a crush."
Equivalent_End5
The rudeness of it all.
An Assist?
Season 4 Flirting GIF by FriendsGiphy"Ask if she wants help..."
"Since they're the same person."
null640
Revenge
"Have sex with his wife. It’s only fair."
ami2weird4u
"My ex fiancée had an affair with a married man. Talked to his wife, she and I made a sex video and sent it to them."
Solid-Acanthisitta86
"I'm not a vengeful nor petty person but this kind of turned me on."
dipstyx
Evidence
"Record it for evidence then talk to a divorce lawyer on how to get a divorce without losing anything."
"Thank them both and move on with my life."
Wraisted
"In most states, the fault isn't a thing that matters beyond the reason. It just may waive the cooling off period... at fault divorces mattering in regards to separation of property ended in the 70's for the vast majority of the country."
"Apparently they discovered that people lie, and it is rarely a clear cut 'this person is the only one guilty.'"
Dredly
GO!
"I'd have to leave, or else I'd commit murder. I would then leave forever, I think I would just leave everything behind and become a nomad at that point and never look back."
AlavarTheBlue
"Also my first thought. Never a more compelling moment to finally hit the road and live every day like it's my last."
yes_yup_uh_huh
"Maybe tomorrow I'll wanna settle down..."
Lost to Me
"Well, it is an extreme level of cheating. One thing is to find your wife in bed with a lover but whole other to find her with your best friend. It is multi-level betrayal and that would leave a huge impact on my future life. Not that I would be sorry for losing that person but because it would make me hard to trust anyone after that. Hope that never happens to me or anyone I know."
Didytz
LOL
bill murray nw GIFGiphy"Exclaim, 'Bob! What the hell? I HAVE to sleep with her, but you??!!'"
Slartytempest
This is more common than you think. Watch Dateline.
How would you react in this situation? Let us know in the comments.
"Parents of reddit: How do you feel when your kid brings back a girlfriend/boyfriend? How do you decide whether you like them or not?"
If They're Happy, I'm Happy...
"It's not up to me to like them, it's up to her. If she does, then I do."
"I care that my daughter is, safe, happy, motivated, handling her own business."
"Apart from that, I'm just enjoying watching her experience things, and hoping she includes me in some of that."- Mahhrat
It Can Be Just As Nerve Wracking For Them.
"Met my daughter's boyfriend the other day.'
'First boyfriend."
"She’s 17."
"He’s 18."
"I must admit I was a bit nervous and I remember very well being 18 and what I was thinking/wanting, but had a word with myself to be welcoming and warm and to treat him as an equal, my daughter's friend, and therefore my friend."
"Anyway, he’s a nice young man so it’s all good."
"But to answer your question I guess if he’s nice I’ll like him if he’s a d*ck I won't."
"Either way as far as my daughter is concerned I’ll like him."- dou8le8u88le
watching you meet the parents GIFGiphyJust Give It Time
"I come from a middle class Indian immigrant family and my parents were never cool with us kids having boyfriends."
"So when at the age of 25 I brought my boyfriend home, they were a bit hesitant and took a long time to open up to him."
"My mom went all mother-in-law mode and felt she had to keep up appearances."
"If he came over and she was laying on the couch, she would get up and act all formal."
"The first day he met my dad, I asked my dad afterward what he thinks of my boyfriend, his response was 'don't lose him, that's all'."
"Now he comes over and hangs out with them without an ounce of formality."
"They all have little inside jokes with him, my siblings included."
"My parents went car shopping and I didn't get to go so my dad asked if the boyfriend and I would go take a look at the car one day after work."
"They just really wanted him to check it out too, which felt so special to me because they value his opinion and he's part of the family now."
"I never would have imagined that my family would welcome him like this."
"Melts my heart."- annnabear
Parents Have A Way Of Surprising You
"Not a parent, but this was my experience with my mother when I was a teen."
"So, as a teen, my mother pulled me to the side and gave me the 'gay talk'."
"You know, the ''I'll still love you even if you were gay' talk."
"I asked her why she thought I was gay and she said it was because I never bring any girls to the house."
"Guess what I did within the next few days?"
"I brought a girl in the house."
"Guess what my mother did?"
"She kicked her out and gave me a lecture on how inappropriate it was to bring girls to the house."
"Yes, it makes no sense."- Mr-Klaus
family guy no girls allowed GIFGiphyYoung, YOUNG, Love
"My 4yo daughter introduced me to the 5yo neighbor kid as a bf."
"She told me he's really good at running fast and he appreciates snails as much as she does."
'Needless to say, this is a keeper."- LittleMissEmmet
What Does This Even Mean?
"My daughter just started dating."
"She was mortified when I picked them up and asked if everything was Gucci."- raynbowz13
Just Be Polite, And Wait It Out...
"My daughter, 13, wanted me to meet her first 'real' boyfriend."
"I was nice and pleasant, but I knew it wouldn't last cause he was all looks and no brains."
"Of course, as jr high relationships go, it was about a 2 month ordeal."
"I think all parents should try and be cordial, unless the person feels like a serial killer or something."- littlecakebaker
Ariana Grande Couple GIF by Justin BieberGiphyThat Feeling
"I have always instinctively known within seconds of meeting them. I've liked all but one of my son's partners, and the one I didn't feel right about was the one who screwed him up."
retailface
"I’ve given my daughter the best advice I can give her and she’s leaps and bounds better at relationships than a lot of older adults I know (she’s nearly drinking age where we’re from)."
"That’s not to brag though as a lot of what I told her was don’t do the same dumb sh*t I did. Well that and to always know her worth."
"The moment someone makes her feel less important than they are they get the boot."
"She doesn’t try to fix people she dates. You are who you are and if you’re not right then oh well (a direct quote)."
"Honestly it’s something she said to me once that helped me be better off when dating (married now)."
"I’d made the remark that I hadn’t understood some sappy things people do when they’re in love."
"She looked me dead in the eyes and said “That’s because you’ve loved but never been in love.” She wasn’t wrong and as much as I sometimes hate to admit it she rarely is."
"That caused me to examine the relationship I was in under closer scrutiny than I ever had before."
"My husband today is the most amazing husband and father we could have asked for but never realized (until now) that we deserved."
Buttercup_Bride
Give Me A Reason Not To
"Not a parent so I called my mom. She stated and I quote:"
“I like all of them until they give me reason not to. Then I never tell you whether I like them or not, so I don’t influence your own judgement. I cannot choose for you, although sometimes I wish I could.” - Mrs. UnappreciatedSon
UnappreciatedSon
Act Natural
"It's about respect, if she treats him right, and compatibility."
"On the other end, not her dad, but my girlfriend's roommate is this old grizzled marine dude. She told me that he liked me because I didn't try to get him to like, which apparently most people do. I was just myself and acted naturally, which he appreciated. Just be yourself and the people that will like you will like you, and the people who won't won't. But always be respectful."
HippyKiller925·
Principals
"My stepdaughters boyfriend came into MY house and we were talking about computer games and he had the audacity to tell me why red dead 2 was better than god of war. IN MY HOUSE!! But respect to the lad for that, he stuck to his principals and a year later still argues with me about gaming stuff."
teksti-tv666
Same Brand of Weird
"My eldest is 15, and boys in high school can be....gross. The way they speak to girls (and girls to boys) is just so far out of line it makes me ill. But her boyfriend is respectful to her and her family. Most importantly they're the same brand of weird. They facetime 19 hours a day I swear, but yesterday they had an entire conversation about penguins both using the same weird fake Russian type accent. He's her safe place and without very good cause, I'd never get in the way of that."
EmptyBobbin
Blown Out of Proportion
"Here's my dad's take. He liked my ex-BF at first because he was initially polite and friendly, and I was very happy with him. However, my dad started to notice red flags later on and his opinion of him changed. For example, when we came back to my place from a day trip, he had sulked because I didn't show the enthusiasm he wanted about his favorite landmark. My dad told him that he should forgive me, but he still would not stop whining. My dad later told me that his reaction was blown out of proportion. Basically my dad would decide whether or not to like any guy I bring home based on the way he treats me."
"Edit: I did not show zero interest in what my ex liked. I just wasn't as over the top excited as he wanted me to be."
smalldoggobigpupper
Reflection of Parenting
"I love to meet his girlfriends. In a very self-serving way, I think his ability to attract charming ladies reflects the quality of my parenting."
"On one hand, I like whoever brings joy to his life. On the other hand, I prefer to be around polite and well-spoken people. A bit of nervousness on her part indicates that meeting me is important to her."
3MTAE
It's ingrained in parent's DNA to worry about their children.
And all parents have an idea of how they want their children's lives to turn out.
Hence their immediate trepidation when they bring their first significant other home.
Of course, their trepidation doesn't always come from a place of judgment, but rather a place of sadness.
As the first partner is a bittersweet reminder that their children aren't children anymore.
Redditor CanadianKiss was eager to hear the most absurd and ridiculous lies people ever heard from their significant others, leading them to ask:
"What was the most insane lie an S/O told you?"
Keep Your Panties On!
"After I found out my wife was having an affair, I snooped through her email, saw she bought 5 pairs of lingerie over the past several months that I had never seen."
"When confronted about it she said she liked the progress she has been making in the gym and just wanted to see how she looked in them and threw them away after she tried them on."- DrMilzie
False Credentials
"Told me she was a veterinarian and even had a degree hanging on her wall."
"My parents own a small farm so I asked her for advice and the answers were always questionable."
"My gut was telling me something is off."
"Googled her school and asked some basic questions that anyone who went should know."
"She didn’t."
"It was all a lie."- Auditory_Whiplash
baby daddy GIF by Face The TruthIt's All About The Anticipation...
"That there was spaghetti waiting for me when I get back."
"There was no spaghetti waiting for me."- IWannaBeMade1
Why Bother?
"That he didn’t like honey when he did."
"It’s insane to me because what’s the point?"
"lmaooo."- astroqualityyy·
Some People Don't Even Try...
“'I got gonorrhea from cutting myself on a broken bong'."
"Survey says, that’s a lie!"- CautiousOwl02
True Love Weed GIF by GIPHY Studios OriginalsGiphyGaslighting 101
"That I was the one who was destroying our marriage for being suspicious all the while she was the one cheating."-shenanigansgalores
Faking Cancer? Seriously?
"I broke up with this dude after only a couple of dates."
"A week later he hits me up asking to take me to lunch bc he just found out he had cancer."
"He tricked me into a year-long relationship based on a cancer lie."
"I believe karma is a b*tch though."- crunchyleafs_
"She called me three months after we broke up to tell me I was right."
"'All that tanning has given me skin cancer'."
"I asked which kind."
"She couldn't remember what the doctor called it."
"I asked, 'Is it lymphoma?'"
"She said, 'Yeah, that's the one.'"
"I hung up."- Spodson
Family Issues...
"That she was an orphan."
"Her family was very surprised."- Garlic_Bread_865589
orphan GIFGiphyThe key to a healthy relationship is honesty, barring of course covering up a surprise which will make your partner happy.
And when the only way to stay in a relationship is through lies and deceit, it's probably time to start re-evaluating how well things are going.
Ironically, that's when it becomes time to really be "honest" with yourself.