Young Professionals Share Tips On How Not Immediately To Tank A Job Interview
Young Professionals Share Tips On How Not Immediately To Tank A Job Interview[rebelmouse-image 18362209 is_animated_gif=
With more and more people entering the labor force, it's important to have great interview skills. Let's be honest, though, a lot of articles about how to give a good interview are kind of boring. This article ain't that.
One user gave Reddit a challenge:
Your task is to ruin a job interview in the first 30 seconds. What do you do?
Reddit responded like they do to pretty much all challenges - and stepped up to the plate in a big way. We've got some suggestions that made us cringe and laugh, and some stories that convinced us some people shouldn't be allowed in public without a chaperone. Have fun!
Tough Guy[rebelmouse-image 18362210 is_animated_gif=
Keep referring to the interviewer as "tough guy." Works equally well for both genders, works even better if the interviewer happens to be younger than you.
Grilled Cheese Sandwich - No Cheese[rebelmouse-image 18362211 is_animated_gif=
I can tell you what one young woman did when I was a hiring manager. She had a perfectly positive phone interview for a business casual, sit-down sales type job with our non-profit, so we scheduled a time for her to come in.
I arrive in the lobby to find this young woman wearing a stained, oversized wifebeater t-shirt, a pair of yoga pants in what I can best describe as an Arizona iced-tea can fake desert pattern, and crocs.
And literally the first words that came out of her mouth were, "I bet I don't look anything like I sound on the phone, do I?"
I was so stunned, I just took her in for her interview with me and my boss. The interview lasted all of five minutes during which she displayed all the personality of a grilled cheese sandwich missing the cheese.
She was not hired.
Interviewer Qualifications[rebelmouse-image 18362212 is_animated_gif=
Ask the interviewer how qualified they are to be taking your interview, and as a bonus, ask for their salary.
I work in a call center as a supervisor. I had this rep who could have been amazing but she just was a miserable person and didn't want to be coached or told what to do.
A few months go by, she had stopped talking to me or even looking at me by this point (literally would not look at me as she walked by and I said "good morning").
Her performance continues to suck and I finally put her on a performance plan. As I'm administering I have my team lead present because at this point I refused to be alone with her with concerns of allegations (for the record....I'm gay, so not that kind of allegations). As I'm administering the plan I'm stating how my team lead will be helping her through the process. The rep interrupted me and starts asking my lead what qualifications she has to be a part of this. My lead being taken aback started to answer. I quickly shut that down and moved on.
She essentially failed on day 1 because she said "I have worked in call centers for many years and I know what I'm doing to take a good call. I'm not going to change my actions just because you think otherwise."
She didn't make it past 30 days after that meeting.
"I Don't Have A Boat"[rebelmouse-image 18362213 is_animated_gif=
I once interviewed a guy who was unbelievably high. A few minutes in, he stops and stare out the window and says "Hey is that my car? I think someone is stealing my car. Oh wait, no, there's a boat on that one. I don't have a boat." Job offers are contingent on passing a drug test.
Key Questions[rebelmouse-image 18362214 is_animated_gif=
"Hi, I do not want to work with black people, do you have any of those?"
In For The Hug[rebelmouse-image 18362215 is_animated_gif=
When he goes for the handshake, step in for the hug. Refuse to move until he reciprocates, and throw in a "mmm," in his ear.
They might go ahead with the interview anyway as a professional courtesy, but you're not getting that job.
The Briefcase[rebelmouse-image 18362216 is_animated_gif=
I used to be a hiring manager and was having a hard time finding a decent employee for the office. I had a phone interview with a guy that seemed really legit. At the end of the phone interview I set up an in person interview with him and ask him to please bring a copy of his resume to the interview. After hanging up I send him an email confirmation of the interview and state "also, please remember to bring a paper copy of your resume."
Day of the interview, he shows up with a briefcase and in a full suit. A little overdressed, but whatever, I'd rather someone over impress than under impress. We go in to the meeting room, he puts the briefcase on the table in front of him and opens it so that he can see in and I can't. He doesn't close it....
I start by asking him if he has a copy of his resume, he responds with a quick "I'm sorry I forgot!". I tell him it's no problem, I'm thinking as long as there are no other red flags it doesn't matter too much. And I proceed with the interview.
Literally every single question I ask him he responds with "well if you look at my resume you will see..." Or something along those lines. I reminded him about 4 times I didn't have a copy because he didn't bring one (ya I had one on the computer but he forgot it and should be able to answer basic questions without referencing it). When he continues referencing it, I give up, finish the interview, thank him, and say goodbye.
One thing still really bothers me... If he forgot his resume... WHAT THE HECK WAS IN THE BRIEFCASE?!
The Birthday Present[rebelmouse-image 18353298 is_animated_gif=
you can do what my brother did and have a hip flask of whisky in your jacket pocket and let it fall on the floor as you take your jacket off
BTW he is not an alcoholic, i had given him the hip flask as a birthday present two weeks before
Passing On A Question[rebelmouse-image 18362217 is_animated_gif=
Most mind blowing interview I ever note took went something like this
Interviewer: Right well we're going to start with 6 standardised questions. Take your time and think about your answer. Tell us about a time when you exceeded in the workplace, what results did you get and how did you achieve them?
Our Hero: thinks for about 5 seconds and then says ... pass
Attendance Not Required[rebelmouse-image 18362218 is_animated_gif=
I actually once got a job that I ditched the interview for.
I was in my early 20s, submitting a ton of applications because why not? Got a call for an interview, said I'd be there, went out partying the night before and slept through the interview time.
I figured that job prospect was shot, so I just gave up on it. The next day, though, I get a call from another manager saying they found my application and it said my interview date was yesterday so they'd like me to come in to fill out all the new hire paperwork. It must've been a miscommunication between all the staff, or something. Either way, I thought it was amusing.
Turning The Tables[rebelmouse-image 18362219 is_animated_gif=
Bring a starter kit from each of my five MLMs in, and "answer" every question by weakly tying the content to at least 3 of the "great opportunities" I have. If called out, admit cheerily that I never wanted the job, I just want to help the interviewer quit theirs, or would they like to host a party for free product??
That's The Stuff[rebelmouse-image 18362220 is_animated_gif=
"Got any pictures of your kids?.... Yeah, that's the stuff."
Establish Dominance Early[rebelmouse-image 18355390 is_animated_gif=
Walk in and go straight for the handshake while making direct eye contact. The second the handshake is engaged let out a nice long fart while maintaining eye contact and don't let go of their hand until your done.
Screaming At The Hiring Panel[rebelmouse-image 18362221 is_animated_gif=
Was on a hiring panel, called a candidate in, the boss asked him, "so, why do you want this job?" Candidate screams "YOU CALLED ME" we all looked at each other, went around the table, questions? no, no, no. Okay, we will contact you, if there is ANY interest.
Ask That Guy[rebelmouse-image 18346555 is_animated_gif=
After going thru the high level interview process , as hiring manager I was brought in to interview someone
I like to break the ice and get a feel for someone's comfort and how they conduct themselves by asking "tell me about what you do now"
Now I have their resume n in front of me so it's not like I can't read it , it's just an easy question that usually gets people talking
So I lob my softball to this candidate ..
And his reply ...
"Man why don't you ask that guy !? " (the hr person who first interviewed him)
"I already told him everything..."
It was at that point I looked at my phone and said "oh no I have an emergency"
And walked out of the room
Blow It Before You Even Show Up[rebelmouse-image 18362222 is_animated_gif=
I've seen 2 situations where someone blew an interview before they even came in for the interview.
-One person got called about an interview for a job they applied for where I was working. They asked what the starting pay was because they didn't want to waste the gas driving across town (10-15 minutes) if the pay wasn't high enough.
-A guy got offered and interview and asked if he was offered the job if they would allow him to wait 1-2 months before taking his drug test.
Both people were told not to bother showing up for the interview.
How to blow one in 30 seconds when you're there? Ask if they test for marijuana because that's not really a drug right?
The Honest Answer[rebelmouse-image 18362223 is_animated_gif=
I did this one time lol. I don't think was quite 30 seconds. Their first question was "so do you think you have any skills that will help you with this job?" I said "I don't think so." That was pretty much it lol
Don't Wait To Be Offered An Interview[rebelmouse-image 18362224 is_animated_gif=
Do what my favorite interviewee story did and show up without being offered an interview.
2 hours later he left (usually a 30 min interview) shouting that he's a team player and that he'd be back.
Resident Advisor[rebelmouse-image 18362227 is_animated_gif=
I had the pleasure of being in the interview process for other resident advisors in college in year 3. A guy sat down and said "Gotta be honest here. I really don't like black people." Quickest interview ever.
Failing A Drug Test[rebelmouse-image 18362228 is_animated_gif=
I had to tell a guy his application was unsuccessful because he failed a drug screen. he test positive to marijuana.
Conversation was like
Me:"Hey Mate, just wanted to let you know that unfortunately you were unsuccessful with your application due to failing the drug and alcohol test"
him: "Oh really ? but i don't understand, i only had like one or two puffs of a joint the day before the test, surely only a few puffs doesn't show up"
Spent the next 20 minutes explaining to him that if you smoke weed, you will fail a drug test.
He just didn't understand
There's an old saying that, "You can't make everybody happy," and that seems true for practically anything, from people's actions to TV shows to simply having to do the laundry.
But there are certain subjects and activities that seem to get a lot more hate than they might deserve.
So much so, it's confused some people.
Curious if other people noticed the hate, Redditor StoneCT asked:
"What gets more hate than it should?"
A Small Kindness
"Smiling at others randomly or just being friendly."
"It seems that a quick smile, acknowledging someone’s presence, or saying hi is just not the thing to do anymore?!"
"Makes me kind of sad. I’m pretty introverted, but I just want to be outwardly happy out and about without being met with glares or resting b***h face."
Honoring the Inner Child
"Being an adult and liking things that are considered childish."
"People get so much hate and get told to 'grow up.' Listen, I didn’t get to enjoy my childhood. Let me enjoy things. Let me play video games. Let me watch the animation. Let me buy that Tamagotchi. It’s not hurting anyone."
Going It Alone
"Solo-traveling is freakin' liberating. Sure, I get a little lonely, but there are NO schedules and you can randomly stop if you see something even slightly interesting."
Just Getting Some Fresh Air
"I go out by myself all the time. I’ll go for a few drinks just to get out of the house, grab a beer, sit outside to enjoy the weather."
"Occasionally I’ll run into people I know, and they try to invite me on for their night, and I’m like, 'I’m good, man, just having a few beers.'"
"And I get these, 'Ookaay? Whatever' type replies."
"Just because I’m out doesn’t mean I want to be social, I just want to be around socialization sometimes."
The Joy of Mocktails
"Not wanting to drink. When you tell someone that you don't drink, most of the time they act like you just told them you juggle heads in your spare time."
"Being single. Everybody acts like it’s the worst thing in the world, but if you are content with being on your own, it’s really not. It’s actually quite relieving to not have the responsibility of another person."
Still at Home
"Being in your twenties or above and living at home with your parents or other family members."
"Being a millennial and wanting to live childless or childfree. For heaven's sake, just let people choose how they want to live their lives."
"Want to be childfree? Cool! Want kids? Cool!"
Love What You Love
"Brussels Sprouts are my favorite vegetable."
Loveable Midnight Furbabies
"Black cats are some of the cutest, most goofy kitties ever. I love them!"
What's with the Hate?
"Donkeys. Those poor fellas just be chillin', doing menial work, and not disturbing anybody, and for some reason, the term came to mean someone who's utterly incompetent and stupid."
Something Written By Hitchcock
"Crows are the best. Gotta respect an animal that'll tell its friends about you if you treat it well or f**k it over. They are just smart MF-ers."
"They'll pay you for snacks and possess an intellect on par with a seven-year-old human. Some say they rival apes."
"Clearly, the only thing stopping them is the lack of hands with opposable thumbs."
Helping the Environment
"Nuclear energy. It's very safe, but a couple of massive disasters due to gross negligence (and also the fact that the word nuclear is involved) have given it a bad image to the point where people just assume it's dangerous and a bad idea."
"Tell you what the bad idea is, it's sticking to fossil fuels."
"The word 'moist.' People love to jump on the bandwagon of hating it. 20 years ago, nobody hated it, but since some people started making a scene over it, it’s become a thing and it's dumb."
Judgment: The Sequel
"People being found not guilty of crimes."
"Usually, before a trial people have made their mind up about a situation and think a person is guilty. So when the jury gets all the information and finds someone not guilty, people get mad at the person found not guilty and the jury."
"Do we not want a system that looks at evidence-based information before making a decision that will affect someone’s life?"
Redditors were surprised to see some of the things that were receiving such negative attention, especially since so many of these are a person's individual choice and which don't impact other people's lives at all.
Sometimes we're in a hurry when we're getting our groceries, and in our rush, we decide the self-checkout line might be the faster option.
But frustratingly, sometimes that is not the case.
Redditor TPABolts88 asked:
"At stores in the U.S., what's so wrong with 'self-checkouts'?"
The Cost of Groceries
"The people who are clueless about self-checkout are definitely an issue, but they're not the only issue, at least to me."
"My main thing is that these self-checkouts are a money-saving measure for the store/company. But the store's/company's prices stayed the same or rose."
"If I'm doing the work that they used to pay someone to do, my grocery bill should be reduced, or at least stabilized."
Not Worth It
"'Please place your item in the bagging area' about one second after I scan the item."
"The scanner scans the item two times and then has to wait for a person to come to cancel the item."
"I hate how these things work. I'm not opposed to using them when they work right and they should really be working better but they're annoying as h**l. I'd rather deal with a human."
"'Please place your item in the bagging area' needs to come on like one or two seconds later than it does. It seems like ShopRite wants me to hurl everything sideways so it passes over the scanner and lands in the bagging area in a single motion."
"When they have over-sensitive sensors that need an employee to reset the scale after every item, and there's only one employee watching a dozen self-checkouts, it slows everyone down (Meijers was notorious for that)."
"For me, the biggest issue is the inconsistency store-to-store with sensitivity. One store I shop at often has zero problems with the self-checkout. Occasionally I get the 'please wait for attendant' notice, but that’s maybe one out of five times."
"The other store I go to the same amount, the self-checkout makes me question my sanity every time."
The Adult Hokey Pokey
"You put your item in the bagging area. You take your item out of the bagging area."
"You put your item in the bagging area and you shake the self-checkout machine all about."
"You do the hokey pokey as an employee comes around. That's what it's all about!"
"I straight abandoned an entire grocery cart half-scanned. It ran into some sort of an error, wanting me to put something in the bag I’d already put in the bag and wouldn’t let me move forward."
"I waited like five minutes and there was no employee anywhere to be seen. I could scan anything and it started beeping at me if I removed items to put them back in my cart."
"So I shrugged it off and said, 'f**k it,' left everything where it was, said sorry to the guy stuck in line behind me, and walked my happy a** out the door to another grocery store where I proceeded to take my items to an actual human who won’t get stuck like the computer does."
No Technical Difficulties, Please
"I'm 100% introverted so I love them. As long as nothing goes wonky and I have to call someone over to fix something."
"Sometimes when I go to use self-checkout, I end up behind someone with an entire f**king cart of groceries who very clearly is not technology-savvy in the least. They stand there looking at the thing like it just landed from Mars, look around desperately for assistance, and start mashing s**t."
"Anyway, that’s the only thing wrong with them. Stupid people. Get in line if you have 60 items and can remember a time when everyone on the same street shared the same phone number."
"I think the issue is the customers at this point. Self-Checkouts have been a thing in most major grocery stores for almost 20 years at this point."
"If you're still incapable of following the directions on a touch screen after 20 years *you* are the problem."
"I'm tired of forgiving stupidity."
New Self-Scan Options
"Sam's Club in the US has a phone scan option. I love it. I scan as I go, I can see my running total so I know if I'm over budget and I check out as I'm walking to the front. They have one or two people checking every person on the way out."
"Most of the time I don't mind self-checkout, but when I have a lot of stuff (ie weekly grocery trip) it doesn't make sense. When there are no regular lanes even open and people are forced to do big runs via self-checkout, that's when it's annoying."
"Now, at fast food places, I think it's dumb. My orders get screwed up enough as it is. If I'm going to put the order in and check out on my own, I'd rather go make the food too so I KNOW it's right!"
"I think of lonely senior citizens whose only interaction might be at the checkout. My aunt was a cashier and she made it her business to chat up anyone who wanted to when she retired, there were so many people who told her they would miss talking to someone."
"I read on Reddit a while ago that in the Netherlands, they instituted 'slow' lines to address this, which warms my cold, under-insured American heart."
"They're meant to replace jobs. These large companies don't want to continue paying employees to scan and bag your items, they want you to do it for free instead. It's all about profits at the expense of low-wage workers."
"There's nothing wrong with them. I get through self-checkout 10x faster doing it myself, no matter how much I have."
"I don't want to wait for someone to scan and bag my stuff anyway, I enjoy having the option of doing it myself. In and out of the grocery store, no muss no fuss, no questions, no asking for donations, etc."
Though most people now utilize the self-checkout lines, they seem to have an endless supply of concerns about them.
From technical errors to human errors, they may not always be the time-saving machines major companies insisted they were.
Some of the best comedians of all time have passed through the doors of Saturday Night Live over at New York's Rockefeller Plaza, and many of them have gone on to achieve superstardom.
Some of the comic legends of the 1970s include Dan Aykroyd, John Belushi, Gilda Radner, and Chevy Chase, while the 80s saw Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Eddie Murphy.
Cast members making star turns today include Kate McKinnon, Pete Davidson, and recently exited actress, Cecily Strong.
With so many greats that have made millions laugh over the years, people have their wide-ranging favorites.
Curious to hear from fans online, Redditor Nickster1619 asked:
"Who is the best SNL cast member of all time?"
Repertory cast members from earlier seasons get a shout-out.
Known For Eugene–The Anal Retentive Chef
"Quite possible! It's Phil Hartman."
The Larry King And Burt Reynolds Impersonator
"Idk about the best, but Norm McDonald was always my favorite."
"Norm did a skit where he played a police sketch artist who wasn't any good at eyes or hair so everybody had a giant hat and sunglasses. It was a rip on the Unabomber sketch with the hood, bandana and glasses. It was so dry and hilarious."
Best Weekend Update Host
"Norm was by far the best weekend update. No question. Seth Meyers and Tina Fey were second. I'm a big fan of Michael Che because I've been following him since he was doing stand-up. Who else? Dennis Miller, meh. Collin Quinn, I like the guy but he wasn't my favorite weekend update by a long shot. Norm was the perfect person for that gig."
The "Beverly Hills Cop" Star
"Eddie Murphy. He carried the show when he was on it, and it probably would have been cancelled if he wasn’t there to do so."
"Seconding! Murphy was at a career peak during his time with the show, and his characters - Gumby, Mr. Robinson, Buckwheat - were iconic."
The Church Lady
"Dana Carvey was incredible in his time."
The 2000s boasted these greats.
Now Starring In "Barry"
"I dont really watch a lot of SNL so my knowledge is limited. He just always appeared to be having a really good time on the show and he's one of the ones who could make me laugh sometimes."
"I loved it when he’d get the giggles at something he was going to say and he couldn’t deliver it because of his laughter. That was as good as the joke."
Love To The Ladies
"Gotta send love to my ladies, it’s Tina Fey for me. Amy Poehler is also a goddess but I don’t remember her as much until Parks and Rec. Also Kenan Thompson? He had such a long run!"
Kiss Me, Kate
"Kate McKinnon. She is the most versatile cast member of modern times."
Longtime Cast Member
"Gotta give some love to Kenan. He is often the center and driver of the sketches. So consistent and has been there so long now."
No one made me crack up harder than the great comedy legend, Gilda Radner.
In 1975, the SNL alum was one of the original "Not Ready for Prime Time Players"–the freshman cast of the show's first season.
A character of hers I'll never forget was the know-it-all Weekend Update advice expert, Roseanne Roseannadanna. YouTube clips of her hilarious turn as the wacky consumer affairs reporter show her comedic timing and delivery brilliance.
Unfortunately, Radner left us too soon in 1989 having died from ovarian cancer. She was 42.
As Forrest Gump famously quipped "stupid is as stupid does".
Forrest was right, as far too many people judged him by purely looking at him, which should not have been indicative of his, or anyone's, overall intelligence.
Even so, we've likely all been guilty of judging someone's intelligence based on a first impression.
Likely owing to something outrageous they said or did.
"What makes you instantly question someone's intelligence?"
One Shouldn't Always Be So Confident...
"Being confidently ignorant."- Tattooed-Tangoamanda tanen catwalk GIF by HULUGiphy
Learning Is An Eternal Gift
"An unwillingness to learn new things."- Electrical-Bid-9577
Don't Be Fooled...
"Interest in a pyramid scheme."- GameCox
"When people are really into a MLM scheme."
"I’m not taking about 'I’m a bored house wife so I decided to start selling makeup, leggings, whatever it may be, because I’m bored and this gives me something to do'.”
"I’m talking about the people who consider it their career and are huge into the Boss Babe lifestyle."- MilehighcarsonTalking Season 3 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy
"When they post one of those things on Facebook saying 'only a few will share!' or when they comment on one of those clickbait 'God has a blessing for you today say amen!' posts."- se7ensquared·
Do You Even Know What I'm Saying?
"Arguing without listening."- dezx156
"Talks a lot and never listens."- BaronVonOstrichangry daffy duck GIF by Looney TunesGiphy
And Now For Something Completely Different
"When you prove your point in a discussion and the other person explains that it doesn’t even matter because their REAL point is something that’s an off-shoot of that subject in a 'gotcha!' manner."- No-Mud-5854
Loud Is Almost Never Right
"People who can only argue by raising their voice."- malkumecks
"Littering."- CannaPanda69driving eric cartman GIF by South Park Giphy
They Have No Idea What They're Missing
"Active hostility to books (as opposed to simply not reading them)."- Manganela
"Being proud of never having read a book."- peppermintcreams
"When they repeat a certain statement word for word I get the impression that they memorized something to sound more intelligent than they are."- Armedes369Talking Nigel Thornberry GIFGiphy
How Much Proof Do They Need?
"They aren't open to changing their beliefs when given new information."- Pretengineer_825
What Are They Trying To Prove?
"Oddly enough, when they try and tell me their IQ."- manwithoutcountry
It is often the people who try to prove how smart they are who end up doing just the opposite.
A truly intelligent person would know better than to do that.