Movies are supposed to make you feel something ... sometimes that something is a deep, deep sense of regret.
One Reddit user asked:
... did you know there was a movie so bad that fans of the show it's based off of literally refuse to acknowledge its existence? Thanks, Shyamalan.
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Avatar: The Last Airbender
You must be mistaken. There was never an Avatar Last Airbender movie made. Never. I'm a big fan so would love for a live action movie to be made. But alas, such an event has yet to occur.
Same, that would be awesome. There's literally no way for a movie like that to be terribly messed up.
The problem is that the animated series is SO GOOD. The gap between the two is so vast that anyone who saw both just says "Nope, that wasn't The Last Airbender. Guess no live action movie was ever made."
The Emoji Movie- my girls made me sit through it when it first came out and I still haven't forgiven them.
I took six kids to see that for my daughter's birthday.
The theatre had those roomy, reclining seats. At the time I was going through a severe situational depression and was always exhausted.
I stretched out and had one of the best naps of my life through the entire movie, waking during final credits feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. The kids absolutely loved the movie, and we ate at Red Robin afterwards.
Best. Party. Ever.
Fight And Flight
Holmes and Watson
That movie triggered both my fight and flight responses.
And the thing is, he was right....but probably not in the way he intended. The movie throws every type of humour up against the wall in the desperate hope that something will work: slapstick, gross-out, surreal, stupid...they even try throwing 'political' jokes in there to score a "duh huh America and Trump" chuckle.
I've never seen a movie flailing around so aimlessly for a cheap laugh.
No Mushu, No Cricket
Mulan live action, no mushu, no cricket, an actor who supports the Hong Kong police, and having to pay money to watch the movie on a service I'm already paying for!?
Plus they took away all of Mulan's growth and development as a soldier and as a woman.....and replaced it with some cheap magical "Use The Force" bull.
Like how could they leave out Cri-Kee bro...
And to think this was the one movie people actually wanted a l I've action version. A more serious take without the talking animals and songs, but more on the war. Get Disney decided to go and again not listen to fans and basically copy the same story(only with no charm/emotion/struggle). Swear it's Rise of Skywalker all over again....Rey, Mulan, really Disney?!
A Deliberate Attack
Son of the mask. The entire time I had a WTF is happening look on my face. Then when it was over, I just turned the TV off and sat in the dark for a few minutes wondering what just happened.
That movie was a deliberate attack on billions of childhoods.
The CGI gives me night terrors
"It Was Like My Body Shut Down To Protect Itself"Jason Derulo Cat GIF by Cats Movie Giphy
Cats. Made it about 25 minutes before shutting it off
Due to the pandemic, there is an increasingly non-zero chance that someone died, and CATS was the last movie they ever saw.
Memory is one of my favorite musical numbers.
My brain literally shut off during the new CATS and theater employees physically woke me up a half hour after the movie ended. I legit only remember a chonky cat eating roaches, the first part of Memory, and then being woken up.
I was like, "oh sh*t I got caught out. If the theater staff were robbers, I'd be dead."
It was like my body shut down to protect itself, and I woke up for a song I like, then my soul left my body. I think I saw a cat wearing a cat skin suit, and like.. took it off like a fur coat to reveal that they're.. also.. a cat..
I had zero interest of trying to see it again. I did thoroughly like the 90's CATS movie because it was set up and shot as an actual stage production, and seeing it attempted in an actual film theatrical way was a cursed adventure into devilry.
3/10 with holy water and a crucifix.
Crimes of Grindelwald. The incompetency behind the basic rules of storytelling in that movie is unbelievable.
Agree. The retcon of "surprise! You're a Dumbledore!" Was so ridiculous.
The creator of this entire universe who claims to know everything about it should know how to not mess up the story. But she was the person responsible for ruining it lol.
And also what happened to all the beasts in this one? They literally stopped existing.
That's One Way To Kill A Witch
Blair Witch 2.
I don't remember much detail, but I do remember that at one point a pentagram appears on somebody's stomach and somebody else says "Maybe it's just a rash!"
Lmao, this was going to be my answer.
Not only did it bizarrely deviate from the found footage style, but there were scenes that would jarringly jump from "filmed on professional cameras" to "this was filmed on a Nokia brick phone." The dialog was terrible. And I clearly remember one scene where the boom mic was visible for a stretch (not just a split second).
I vaguely recall that a large portion was literally filmed in a backyard, too. Still made money compared to its production costs, but the bait and switch by using the original's name pissed so many people off.
Blair Witch went from "this could be an entire franchise" to it disappearing from the film world for over a decade.
Deep Shame And Regret
2012: Doomsday. I have so much deep shame and regret that I wasted 90 minutes of my life watching that movie.
Not to be confused with the semi-eponymous action flick, this rhinoceros bowel movement has got to be the most atrocious movie in all existence.
It was made as part of some kind of "Faith Films" project. You know, it's the type of movie religious groups have commissioned to put a strong religious point across in a cringe-inducing manner. Now, I have nothing against that concept, but when you execute it in a manner so bad that I want to gouge my eyes out just typing about it, you know there's something wrong.
The premise is as simple as it is idiotic - Some archaeologists discover a cross in an ancient Aztec temple, concluding that the Aztecs knew about Christ all along. They also discover a calendar that foretells a great catastrophe will occur in 2012, and only the dismal acting skills of the merry band of mentally handicapped people assembled to make the movie can make it all go away.
There's a Latina pregnant woman / Virgin Mary clone that gives birth on an ancient pagan altar, thereby saving us from doom, the archaeologist's ex wife, played by a French actress who can't put two meaningful English sentences together, and, of course, the skeptic nurse who discovers God after a platitude-ridden talk in her car.
You have to see this movie to believe something like it can exist. How in the world this got past any sort of quality control and into world-wide distribution is beyond me. To this day I bring it up when talking with my brother from time to time since he was the one that suggested we watch it.
Wait ... There Are Two?!
An animated version of the titanic - at the end it said "and they all lived happily ever after"
I've heard of this. There's multiple movies. The "happily ever after" element is a complete disrespect to all of those who lost their lives or were affected by a very real tragedy.
So are you talking the one with the rapping dog, or the one with the talking octopus? Because after someone made a terrible animated ripoff of the James Cameron flick, somebody thought it would be a good idea to ripoff the ripoff.
The ship still sank, but they made it so everybody survived. Although I'm not sure which of the two Titanic animated movies OP is talking about: the one with the rapping dog, or the one with the whaler-talking sharks conspiracy and the puppy-faced octopus.
Life is full of suspicions and theories that we'll never be able to prove in concrete but are just obvious. I'm not talking about wild conspiracy, but thoughts that make sense without a shadow of a doubt. Just lacking tangible evidence. Which can sound like wild conspiracy.
Think about aliens, ghosts, unsolved murders, all situations we know we have validation, but... do we have solid receipts? The everlasting issue. Let's break it all down.
Redditor u/Lazy-Ape wanted to dive into what we know deep down are facts, no matter what others say, by asking:
What are you convinced is true but cannot prove?
I don't know where to begin. I know who killed JonBenet. But I can't say. But we all know, and we can't say. It's no theory, but we have no receipts.
"There is some scam going on with power companies in the US. The colder months when I literally don't turn on the AC at all (electric for heat and cold) is basically the same price... I called and asked them if they are averaging it and they say no... someone is lying."
"That Tom Holland "spoiling thing" and some "leaks" are all a marketing strategy. And it works!"
"I'm not a fan of superhero movies but i saw him idk why my algorithm did that and yes you are right, you have to be next-level stupid to be spoiling stuff accidentally, one time I understand but not again and again. He is not a kid (although he looks like one)."
"The real Sonic movie was already finished. Then they put some extra time in to make the bad sonic trailer. The outrage it cost was the best publicity they could get for the movie."
The X Files
"The evidence for aliens to exist is so strong that it is not really a question of their existence. Look up Drake's equation if you haven't. Just consider 100-400 billion stars in just our galaxy, the milky way. And then 100 billion other galaxies in the observable universe."
"Each star has a habitable zone and some have Rocky planets in their habitable zone. There are many forms of life and the are theories about forms of life that are not carbon based either. There is no doubt there is alien life. Now intelligent alien life is going to be much much rarer, but still there is a high probability of intelligent aliens. Look up Fermi paradox."
Show me the...Pay Day Money GIF by MOST EXPENSIVESTGiphy
"Money can buy happiness."
"This one's been proved. I don't remember the numbers but people are happier the more they make up to a certain dollar amount. If nothing else money buys peace of mind, which is the next best thing."
Life is a mess of confusion. Can any of us prove anything? Well yes, money DOES buy happiness. That is just truth. Go out and get some.
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"That earth is simply a 5th grade science project for some kid, to whom we are the size and importance of fruit flies. Our entire existence and history amounts to about 5 days in her time."
"Google many worlds theory. Worlds is a misnomer, if iirc. Basically it's a solution/interpretation of quantum mechanical wave function I think (not an expert). It's much more complicated than that and a lot of it very sciencey. And very philosophical. Don't get surprised if you get an epiphany. https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/qm-manyworlds/ Here you go , it isn't deep quantum mechanics but it does do a nice job of explaining it."
"Ten-ish years ago Google offered a free 411 service using voice-to-text. You spoke the person or company you wished to call (and perhaps added the address) and the Google computer would respond with the information. They stopped the "experiment" or "beta" or whatever they called it after 3-4 years. The conspiracy theory? Google now uses that voice recognition for their Google Assistant devises and services. AND has sold the technology to the government to improve wiretaps and eavesdropping."
I WANT TO MAKE SURE IT FITS!!!
"I'm lowkey convinced there's a clothing industry conspiracy to keep physical retail outlets in business. There's an unspoken mutual agreement to make sure everyone uses their own proprietary clothing sizes. That makes it impossible to transition clothes shopping to a fully online experience."
"Clothing shops suck. The selection is garbage. They are always short on certain sizes. They are always understaffed and it takes forever to grab something from the backroom. It always takes forever to go through checkout. People still go to physical clothes shop though. What's the number 1 reason they give? I WANT TO MAKE SURE IT FITS!"
The King!elvis presley GIF by MauditGiphy
"Elvis Presley lived in Las Vegas impersonation himself from 1978 to 2013, when he actually died. Easiest case of witness protection ever."
Oh Elvis. Just say hi. Keep strong in your fortitudes. Find all of your evidence. Prove life.
When reflecting on failed relationships, do you ever wonder if you've missed any indication the person you used to share a bed with was not a good match?
"What 'Red Flags' did you totally miss in your past relationships? And why?"
A person's lack of trust in a relationships is indicative of a larger issue.
"She insisted on checking my phone all the time, but I was never allowed to touch her phone, ever."
Phone With X-Rated Content
"when one month into the relationship I discovered nudes of other women on his phone and that he still had Tinder. when three months into the relationship he went though my text messages and read through old conversations I had with someone before I even started seeing him and somehow made me feel guilty about it, and four months into the relationship when he cheated on me for no reason other than that he could in the moment and he was drunk. it took me three years to break up with him."
Addicts who will not get help are bad candidates for love.
It's Not Up To Us To Change People
"I was too new to realize that you can't 'fix' an addict."
"That somehow there was always a good reason to drink. Later he became lazier and stopped pretending to have a reason and just drank the whole time out of habit."
"I'm half convinced zombies are a metaphor for addicts. They look like your loved one which why you don't immediately recognize them as a bottomless pit of hunger that will either get close enough to try to bite you and turn you into one of them or simply tear chunks out of you until there's nothing left."
"I married a mom's boy. I didn't see the problem at first but things got weird quickly. She controlled him and our marriage."
"It took 15 years and couple of kids, but I left that situation. The funny part is, after the divorce, she and I got along quite well."
Gaslighting is a common problem in relationships that people unfortunately are unable to identify early on.
"He 'didn't get jealous' but he also didn't want me to hang out with male friends. Or, in fact, other people in general. One time he came to pick me up from the cinema, saw I'd been there with a friend, and got so mad on the drive home that he punched the steering wheel. That was...a thing."
"He also took advantage of my mental health problems to not only gaslight me but to make him look like the better person and to make me out to be crazy. I didn't realise the extent of it until ages later when I was in a healthy relationship! Lesson time: if someone is constantly making you feel uneasy and vulnerable, they are not your friend, let alone your partner."
"YES. The whole 'I'm not controlling you because I'm not directly 'forbidding' anything; I'll just find ways to emotionally punish you after, until you can't muster up the energy anymore' game. A classic. Your world shrinks month by month, seemingly by choice, and one day you look up and realize you have nowhere else to turn. Textbook."
"If they're yelling anything like 'I'm not controlling!' or 'I don't get jealous!' at you, it's a red flag. This is NOT a debate that needs to happen in healthy relationships. You're not crazy, you're just being gaslighted. Sure sign to GTFO."
Mental Health Denier
"First bf I had, he was 24 I was 18. Was the only person outside my family who I told about my depression after I was diagnosed with it. He said that was a fake disease. Because this was many years ago and on the media, there wasnt much info about it like nowadays, I believed him. One time he went out with me and my sister, he took us home but he was extremely wasted. He crashed against a wall and the car was a total loss."
"At that moment I felt like sh*t because of his car and because 'this wouldnt have happened if he wouldn't have taken us home'. Months later he used to laugh about the accident because his parents bought him a new car. He was always joking about how we 'defeat death', and later confessed to me that he knew the brakes were not working properly that night. I was so f'king pissed cause my sister and I could have died. Overall the guy was a complete a**hole and I am glad we only dated for 9 months. After that I have never dated with anyone who drives after drinking, nor with anyone who believes mental health issues are fake."
Many in the thread said red flags are often there but are ignored.
This was true for a friend of mine who was in an emotionally abusive relationship. She recognized all the signs telling her she needed out of that relationship, but she stayed with him because, "he was working on changing to be a better person."
She held him to that promise for three years and realized he was not making any effort to change at all, but she refused to see it because she "loved him."
She eventually left him and is now happily married. Her only regret was the fact that she wasted a lot of time ignoring what her gut had been telling her all along.
It was a good reminder we should trust our instincts more.
Can you see Harry Potter at a football game in the Midwest? Chowing on a corn dog, throwing back some good ole Pepsi-Cola? Or can you picture the Harry universe living and loving in the great U. S of A? What would casting look like against the backdrop of the great harvest plains? I have so many thoughts and ideas. The first thought, the change would never work. Keep the story alive on British soil.
But, for fun, let's chat about the idea.
Redditor u/Cuish wanted all the Potter heads out there to share what American tweeks would occur in the Potterverse within America, by asking:
If Harry Potter was set in the United States, how would the story change?
I just can't see anyone else saying those words other than the people who did. And it's not that America can't do great fantasy, look at Buffy. Which also benefitted from the Brits. Coincidence?
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"Quidditch coach is the highest paid "professor" at the school."
"Harry would probably live in New Jersey. Ron would probably live in Kentucky or Tennessee, and Hermione would probably be from California. They would go to ileverany (I spelled it wrong it's the North American wizard in school), which is in Massachusetts. There would be a train but only for people in Boston-New York-Philly-DC corridor. Everyone else would use flying cars. Outside of that it is a typical American boarding school."
"Airport terminal 9 and 3 quarters."
"Eagles instead of Owls. Sasquatch instead of Centaurs."
"We have owls though? Eagles would be more of a flex but like, owls would still work better as they fly night and day. OK. Eagles would be an option. The useless 1 miles per gallon of gas muscle car of the owl world. Americans are super obnoxious. We suck. I get it. Sorry. Lmao."
"Too conventional. Leave it to the Wizarding World to adopt the mythical Ben Franklin's turkey idea instead. Idk how the heck that'd work as a delivery service, mind you, but still."
RelicsHappy Harry Potter GIFGiphy
"The school would be a defunct military base because we don't have any incredibly old buildings, and the uniforms would be military style instead of robes. 'Murica."
Well those sound like some solid choices. Who doesn't love taco Tuesday? And why are sports always the first go to change?
Happy 5th!Happy Birthday Dancing GIFGiphy
"Taco Tuesdays at the Great Hall."
"And a freaking epic (but pointless) Cinco De Mayo party. For non Americans, it's mostly an excuse for Americans to drink on a Mexican holiday. It gets cringey. But hey, on other hand, tacos and margaritas."
"Nathan Fillion would've been cast as Guilderoy Lockhart."
"They would change 'philosopher's stone' to 'sorcerer's stone'."
"The editors wanted Rowling to change the name to "Sorcerers Stone" so that the readers would know the book is about magic, and not some philosopher with a theory about a stone and sends a random guy on a mission to find it. Most people that are not American underestimates an American's brain capacity. I'm American. We are not as stupid as you think."
The Drop Off
"No train ride to Hogwarts. Instead, parents will be dropping them off by car. A huge parking lot just outside Hogwarts, and instead of Diagon Alley, a large Wal-Mart exists surrounded by nothing more than another parking lot."
"It's hidden by being inside a Walmart parking lot. But when you reach the edge, almost to the building, muggles get all turned around and suddenly notice the Walmart was at the other side of the parking lot. This can repeat until the muggles either get inside a real Walmart, or go away."
Commercial GainFlying Harry Potter GIFGiphy
"This quidditch match is brought to you today on ESPN by Swiffer, the official broom of the Quidditch Cup."
"Quidditch in the old South West Conference was crazy… I remember when Texas A&M offered Eric Dickerson that gold Swiffer and he took it and rode it up to Dallas to sign his letter of intent with SMU."
Nothing here really seems necessary. It was fun to dabble in the thoughts though. Keep perfect as is.
Life isn't as simple as one may think. It's not always easy to take a step back and look at the big picture, but when there's over seven billion people on the planet, there's no way things are as cut and dry as they seem.
Everyone's experiences are different going through life. We may not be able to see the complexities it if we haven't lived it ourselves.
So we went to Reddit because we wanted to see what's not as simple as people think it is.
Redditor Queasy_Researcher_27 asked:
"What's not as simple as people think?"
There's never a bad time to learn something new, so keep reading to get a different perspective on life.
Driving a bus.
"Driving a bus. It's very tiring focusing on the road for up to 10 hours a day and having to look in the mirror every 5 to 8 seconds while making sure all your passengers are safe and well on top of try to work out what other motorists are gonna do in front and behind you."
"Really, driving in general should be like this but most people ignore most of these aspects and that's why we get accidents involving inattentive drivers."
"Thank you for taking your job seriously, though. An inattentive bus driver would be phenomenally dangerous."
"Getting out of poverty. Especially if you're born into it."
"This. Very few people who haven't experienced poverty, understand how systemic it is in keeping people trapped in it."
"Even grocery shopping while broke is hard....more money you have the easier it is to take advantage of the offers and weekly/daily deals."
"Its not even as simple as being poor. I think finding comfort in poor is a huge part of it."
"I was raised middle class. And being able to go out to a nice restaurant without worry was one of many luxuries that are now nostalgic to me. And even when my family dropped all support and I had to work up from nothing again, I was never comfortable until I was back there again."
"On the flip side, I have no idea what it would be like to be rich rich. Like designer clothes, fancy cars, knowing-the-right-people parties. There's a 'lane' of upper-middle class-rich that Is foreign to me and I have absolutely no desire to push or work to get to that. I wouldn't know what to do with it if I did."
"I'm not saying that those that grow up poor are stuck that way or don't know how to get out of it or anything like that, but there's something so damn nice about what-you-know. I can imagine if all you know is being broke AF it would be so much harder."
Mental health matters.
"Getting out of depression."
"'Just be happy.' Yeah Mom, I like being sad all the time..."
"Relationships! I thought it was simple. You love someone, they love you, that's all you need. Ohh how wrong I was haha."
"Welcome to the club. It's even worse when you have to give up before you even get a chance to truly love the person. You just have to go on with life knowing that you wanted to and were willing. So yeah, relationships, don't recommended those lol."
"Same. I could never understand why my friends would brake and then get back together with there a**hole ex's after what they made them go through until I was in my own relationship and had my own a**hole ex."
Moving on from relationships.
"Moving on, even when you want to."
"There are relationships I've moved past, but doubt I will ever truly 100% get over. Years of time, therapy, meditation, burying myself in my career, hitting the gym and getting in the best shape of my life and even now these people occupy more mental real estate and influence how I go about making decisions."
"Hey man that's natural, it's just what makes us human. As long as people can embrace that it is easier to understand and deal with."
"Relationships form the strongest memories, so it's natural for them to always be there and pop up when you least expect it."
This effects the last two.
"None of us are ready to talk about this one bud."
"Learn English, it's super painful because it isn't consistent and [doesn't] make any sense most of the time (at least for a Spanish speaker)."
"It's worse for someone from a language like Russian, since you have to figure out what the hell an article is and how to use it (Slavic languages don't have them). My wife has been living in the US for 10 years and still routinely messes them up."
"There's also the inconsistency between when to add an S to a word. For nouns it's when they're plural. But for verbs it's when they're singular (third person)."
"And the TH sound can be very difficult for someone who is an adult to master, since vocal cords harden with age to your preferred language."
"Making a movie, it takes hundreds of people to make a film and most of them actually put effort and care into the project."
"I went to a filmmaking summer camp for 2 weeks. While was SUPER fun, it took a lot of effort to put the movie together and I learned just how long it takes to really make a movie."
"Same goes for making games, hundreds of people sometimes who all care very much for the product they produce, however chewed up it gets by publishers."
Making friends as an adult.
"Making new friends as adults."
"Yeah this is me. When i was a kid I was just able to approach someone without thinking too much of it, I'd consider anyone I've talked to as a friend. Idk what age hit me when i realized that we're just acquaintances. Now I just can't go up to someone and make a conversation without an intention, and you also have to feel what that person is thinking. Maybe its just me overthinking this."
Though these things are not as simple as they seem, we are all going through life together. At some point or another, we may find that we need to walk a mile in someone else's shoes to really understand the difficulty of the situation.
Variety is the spice of life. Without the difficulties and challenges that come along the way, life would be pretty boring.